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  2. Guilietta

    Len189: I messed up

    Hello Len Ack! Look at the date. Sorry not to have responded sooner. I need to adjust mysettings. 😉 Every day is a step toward full recovery - even if on the 'outside' we feel crummy from time to time. I am so thankful for this site. I have learned some lessons myself. My CT has let me know that I should never trust the medical industry again. This is a pity because I don't like investing my time in being an MD or pharmacist myself. No one pays me $500 for 15 minutes. 😁 Have a good one. Giulietta
  3. Time for a happy dance! A relief from dystonia. Sending positive thoughts for more days like this one.
  4. Guilietta

    Rhi: Incremental success

    Hello dear Rhi, What an inspiring autobiographical sketch and resilient woman you are. The big changes in your life - under the strain of pressure to hasten your tapers - and doing just that - the fatigue and emotional turmoil of career changes and your intense period to see your daughter and grandchild through a difficult transition period. And to move from being suicidal (and making an attempt) to being happy (even if not every day?) - accepting the WD symptoms that still hang around - is outstanding. I am so pleased for you and am thankful to you for your support and help to me. Without it I would be up a creed without a paddle. Thank you for sharing your story. Giuilietta
  5. Hi, Fish. I copied this from your earlier post because I'm concerned that your crossover was to a lower dose than we recommend. We go by this equivalency chart that's been used for years on various benzos forums - Benzo Equivalency Chart. Xanax is 20 times as potent as Valium, so going from 1.5 mg Xanax should have been to 30 mg of Valium. It's good you're feeling better with the crossover and the decrease but as you point it, it's "almost like a paradoxical withdrawal effect." Some people experience episodes of hypo-mania with sudden benzo decreases where they do feel better for awhile. This can cause people to continue tapering until the hypo-mania ends in a crash (feelings of fatigue, depression, etc). I don't know if this will happen to you, but it is a concern. Would you be willing to hold for a couple of weeks and see how your mind/body reacts to all of these recent changes? It will be helpful to know more about your benzo history, as well as the history of your other drugs. Please add a signature. Include drugs, doses, dates, and discontinuations & reinstatements in the last 12-24 months. Also include supplements. This will help us give you the most accurate advice we can. Any drugs and supplements prior to 24 months ago can just be listed with start and stop years. Please use actual dates or approximate dates (mid-June, Late October) rather than relative time frames (last week, 3 months ago) Spell out months, e.g. "October" or "Oct."; 9/1/2016 can be interpreted as Jan. 9, 2016 or Sept. 1, 2016. Please leave out symptoms and diagnoses. A list is easier to understand than one or multiple paragraphs. This is a direct link to your signature: Account Settings – Create or Edit a signature.
  6. Hello Carmie Been thinking of you and stopping by to say hello. Hugs, Giuilietta
  7. TomSawyer50

    TomSawyer50 Hello with an intro and my story

    Edit fixed @Altostrata do you think its better to get stable via a different drug and taper as I think the Remeron has pooped out or start tapering now? How would I know if the remeron has pooped?Any opinion about this still being Cymbalta wd 6 months later?
  8. Today
  9. Sorry, I forgot about your time change. Yes, this will work fine. Many of us feel a bit down when the time and seasons change, so do a lot of self care.
  10. This sounds like a good plan. Yes, stabilize first. You've got some great non-drug coping techniques with meditation, journaling, and exercise. This will set you up for a much easier taper journey.
  11. Does the Zyprexa help with sleep or do you rely on the Ativan for sleep? If you find that the Ativan is what is helpful the most for sleep, you may want to come off the Zyprexa first. Zyprexa has a very long list of potentially dangerous side effects, so it may be a better one to remove first. Be careful about coming off it at too high a dose (you mention "without trying to taper it all down") because some people find themselves with more severe symptoms toward the very end of the taper. If you're doing well on a taper, it's best to see it all the way down to a very low dose than to risk problems when the finish line is so close in sight. Just some thoughts.
  12. Is this correct or a typo?
  13. Kronos18

    Kronos18: Lexapro withdrawal

    Thanks Leo. I will have a look into it. This thing is so crazy, but as I never had this issues before the pills i'm pretty sure it's withdrawal.
  14. TomSawyer50

    TomSawyer50 Hello with an intro and my story

    Remeron not Paxil
  15. Leo1983

    Kronos18: Lexapro withdrawal

    Hi man. Have you been to GP? You could ask for a electroreinogram. Its a range of tests which examine the electrical activity in your eye basically. Looks at the whole eye and the optic nerve. Again if the eye looks ok??? its likely a time thing. Electro retino gram.
  16. Update I feel pretty okay right now. Headache is better. Only thing bothering me right now is tinnitus and stomachache and some anxiety.
  17. Guilietta

    Guilietta

    October 21 Log 4 a.m. Awakened - fell asleep without trouble 6.45 a.m. Awakened 7 a.m. Breakfasted and meds (dulox liquid, gaba 300 mg, clonaz .5 mg, crestor 10 mg, lisinipril 2.5 mg) + calcium/magnesium + fish oil 11.00 a.m. Stomach is upset 12.30 p.m. . Ate lunch 2 p.m. Gabapentin 300 mg and dulox 4 p.m. Anxiety 6 p.m. Ate dinnerďťż. Took 600 lamotrigine ER 9:20 p.m. Headache 10:00 p.m. Fell aslelep - 4.30 a.m Awakened with tremors, anxiety and chills but got back to an uneasy sleep (this starts 10/22)
  18. I feel me worse and worse day after day Can't stand. I feel like I'm dying. Vega
  19. Kronos18

    Kronos18: Lexapro withdrawal

    Hello. Can anyone relate to these visual symptoms? -Afterimages(powerful lights stay even around 1 minute when I close and open my eyes I can see them) -Light sensivity (My eyes hurt a lot) -Light flashes (I have some sort of sand in my backyard, when I look at it, seems like if flashes) -Problems switching from low light to bright light -Tiny white dots moving in my vision(doing circles) -A lot of floaters -Blurred vision I mention that this whole nightmare started for me after the benzo use(2 weeks). Will I recover from it? I had no problems like this in the past. It's been 11 months feeling like this after benzos and is worse as ever.
  20. Hello Shep, Yes I'm little less affraid with this schedule. Can I stay at 9, 3, 9 for prazepam ? (Remember :hour change in France sunday) Thank you Vega
  21. Yes, separating the 2 drugs will be very helpful to see how you are reacting to each drug. I understand you don't wish to change the benzo timing. What do you think of moving the escitalopram? We really need to see how you feel on the escitalopram without the prazepam. What do you think of the below schedule? You would still have the 3 daily benzo doses, but the escitalopram would be 2.5 hours after the morning benzo and 3.5 hours before the afternoon benzo. To do this, you would move your escitalopram only one hour per day. Please post your thoughts on this. 8. 15 am : homĂŠopathy, probiotics, lihium citrate 9. 30 am : prazepam 4.75 mg noon - escitalopram1.5 mg 12.30 : homeopathy 3:30 pm - prazepam 4.75 mg 7.45 pm homĂŠopathy, 9.30 PM prazepam 4.75 mg 11.30 pm : homeopathy and L-tryptophane 220 mg
  22. My doctor adamantly told me "olanzapine doesn't cause habituation/dependence, you can just stop taking it", which is to, to say the least, logically untrue since when I first started taking it knocked me out, whereas now it doesn't do anything. I am seriously considering dumping this imbecile doctor and going back to the old one.
  23. Did not sleep until about 6am. Light in and out of sleep until 8am. 8am: Wake up anxiety. No way to sleep even though I’m so tired. 9am-12pm: Same. 12pm: Out of bed and feel horrible. Hot, sweaty, vision bright, dizzy for first time ever, head feels like a balloon, anxiety, stomachache, tight burning forehead is back. 1230pm: Go to get food. Eat. 1pm: On couch. Extremely angry. Everything makes me very very upset. Same symptoms as above. Yelling, crying, feel like a psycho. High anxiety. 2pm: Take .10mg of Ativan. 3-4pm: Same as 1pm. 5pm-8pm: Go to play video games. A bit calmer. 8pm: Go to get food. Eat. Probably feel the worst I’ve ever felt. Fear is coming back, brain fog coming back, horrible burning headaches are back, just feel like a psycho it’s intense. 9pm: Ears getting super clogged and anxiety really picking up. This always happens around this time. Don’t want to be left alone. Scared. 10pm: Video games. Feeling horrible need a distraction. 11pm: Feeling okay. Calm. Tired. 1130pm: Take .375mg of Ativan. 1230pm: Feel the same maybe a little worse? 1am: Stomach really hurts. 2am: Ready for bed. Stomach really hurts. Tight burning forehead still there. Clogged ears ears are better. 230am: Definitelt calmer Today again unlike any other day. I feel like my old symptoms are all coming back slowly since I quit the RI like fear, dp/dr, brain fog, severe headaches. But now I have new symptoms such as dizziness and stomachaches which I’ve never had ever. Also burning headaches in my whole head. Burning of my body is still a thing, numb penis is gone. Since I quit my RI all that’s gotten better is the numb genitals and everything else has gone down hill I believe. I think the RI was working at the lower dose and the Ativan is the one causing the problems.
  24. Thanks @Altostrata thats very interesting about the timing for the full effect. I had hoped that now I am taking much less Vortioxetine then things would have improved not got worse but there are no guarantees I know. Maybe the vortioxetine reduction is intensifying the destabilisation from the Sertraline. I know some of the symptoms are the same as the beginning of the year when i was destabilised from the high reinstatement such as the burning, the numbness at night, the chemical anxiety but then there are new symptoms in the last 3 months which I never had before such as these daily intrusive memories and the bruxism. 21/10 8.00am - get up have shower, distressed because of the bad night,suicidal ideation strong, jaw is sore from the clenching, tired 9.00am - take 2mg diazepam, feeling dread about the future, try and tell myself I will get better than this 10.00am - feel a bit calmer, speak to mother in law on phone she boosts my hope with her hope 11.00am - do some work emails 12.00pm - eat sandwich, still feeling down worried if i will sleep tonight, try and change the channel 1.00pm - head feels tingly and vice like - very similar to first few days of sertraline taper 2.00pm - take 1mg diazepam 3.00pm - do a little bit of work 3.30pm - children walk past house coming home from school, reminds me of being at school and get intense electrical anxiety reaction right through to my head,brain tingling and feels like its on fire - for no reason, I didnt have a traumatic schooling. 4.00pm - sense of edginess comes over me and also a few random memories with anxiety spikes - pattern seems to be in the afternoon. take 2mg vortioxetine 5.30pm - eat some dinner 6.00pm - feel a bit calmer, play a quiz with husband 7.00pm - take 2mg diazepam 8.00pm - take 16mg sertraline and lie down 10.00pm - fall asleep 12.00am - woken with a burning electric anxiety feeling 1.00am - 5.00am - woken with teeth clenching and electric anxiety through my stomach and head and arms going numb repeatedly
  25. Hello @Shep i thought about the schedule : - you want to sÊparate the 2 drugs to sÊe the rÊactions I have with each drug - With the AD at noon and 2 x prazepam it will be more clear for you - if I take the AD at noon and not the morning it is possible even if not sÝre to have an impact of my sleep. That's why you think of taking more prazepam on evening? Is it correct or not? What would be your move plan to 2 equal doses of prazepam ? 1) 9.30 am 4,75 mg, 2,30 pm 2,375 mg, 4.30 pm 2,375 mg, 9.30 pm 4,75 mg 2) 9.30 am 4,75 mg 1.30 pm 2,375 mg, 5.30 pm 2,375 mg, 9.30 pm 4,75 mg 3) 9.30 am 4,75 mg, 12.30 2,375 mg, 6.30 pm 2,375 mg, 9.30 pm 4,75 mg. 4) 9.30 am 4,75 mg, 11.30 am 2,375 mg, 7.30 pm 2,375 mg, 9.30 pm 4,75 mg 5) 9.30 am 4,75 mg, 10.30 am 2,375 mg, 8.30 pm 2,375 mg, 9.30 pm 4,75 mg 6) 9.30 am 7,125 mg, 9.30 pm 7,125 mg ? Maybe I say foolery but I try to anderstand. For my part, I notice that my taper of Sertraline 50 to 25 mg has been sucessfull, with lot of physical symptôms that I have now again but the were more slightly during my taper of sertraline. During my taper of Sertraline, it was not easy with physical symptôms, but I can stand it. And as soon as I tapered, my physical symptôms reduced, with one week a month who were harder than the others : the most often the third. I had only physical symptôms. The nervosity fast reduced. I had no anxiety, no dÊpression ( I have been Never dÊpressive of my life until +/- 2 month), had a good sleep.. The problèm was that I had too much prazepam. It helped me to not be too nervous and agitated when I had the biggest doses of AD, but in the same time, they made me important drowsiness, problèm of concentration and memory. Early and morning I feeled not nervous, and no drowsiness. 8.30 am I took AD 9 am I took prazepam -/+ 9.30 am : a lot of drowsiness +/- Noon : nervosity, agitation 3. pm I took prazepam +/- 3.30 pm a lot of drowsiness +/- 6 pm nervosity, agitation 9.pm took prazepam 10-10.30 pm drowsiness, feeled asleep. As soon as I tapered sertraline, nervosity dissapered. In the same time I reduced benzo very slowly, but drowsiness increased at the hours I have telling you. That why I make sôme little adaptations of prazepam with no big problèms. But, drowsiness became harder and harder. During april to june who I stoped tapering Sertraline I feeled me good with very, very little physical symptôms. And in the same time I tapered prazepam more fast, but carefull I recovered memory, I was abble to drive , that I couln't do because of drowsiness and problèmes of concentration, a little (20 km), drowsiness dissapeared or very slight. My mood were stabilized. As physical symptôms I had only arms pain but in progressive rÊduction and sometimes head pain but not very hard. But ...in end june I feeled me a little nervous again and it increased slowly. As I told you, I think that dose of escitalopram was too hard for me. At 5 mg nervosity increased very fast. I let me convinced to taper harder as I wanted to, even if I knowed that the rÊduction effects are coming after long time for me. (Slow mÊtabolism?) And now I hav a lot of symptôms that I know very well for having thèse during my taper of sertraline but the are very very harder. And I have other new symptôms as anxiety and dÊpression. At 5 mg I was very nervous, the nervosity has dissapeared since two month, but now I have depression and anxiety with other symptôms that I knew well for most of thèm during sertraline taper, but the intensy is very very harder as it was, too hard. Sorry to have been so long. But my feelings are really that the problèmes is first of all escitalopram, started with too hard dose and too fast tapered which is on the origine of my hard symptôms. It is maybe possible too that prazepam takes anxiety too : I have increased my dose since one month and I Never had the same dose of prazepam so long time. I'm affraid that if I change schedule and mostly benzo division (more benzo evening than morning), it will be desequilibrate me again. And that's why I think that an little increasing of escitalopram might help me. That is my point of view, my feelings, but you are the experts. Have a good day. And thank's a lot. Vega
  26. So nice to hear! I hope the windows keep on coming!
  27. Thanks for these ChessieCat, harks back to simpler times. Good to share with nieces & nephews. Cheers
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