Jump to content

catmama: Introduction


catmama

Recommended Posts

Thank you for checking in, friends. I haven't logged in on here in a while. It's been really hard. I feel ok most days, but never good. And other days, I feel downright terrible. I know that the advice is to go slow, towards the end, but it's not working. Holding, doing micro-drops, etc. The results are the same: I feel like ****. So I am pressing on. I dropped 10% six weeks ago and did another 10% drop yesterday. So my current dose is now 0.73mg. It's truly insane to me that this tiny of an amount could have this much affect on my body. (I will read the links you sent Ariel, thank you.) My WD symptoms are 95% physical, pretty much always have been. It's so depressing to be essentially disabled like this at 34. Yes, I will get better. But when? That's what exhausting - physically and emotionally - to be enduring this for so long while life just passes me by. 

2013-2015: paroxetine, with brief switch to sertraline, and brief combo with bupropion  • 2015: got off all antidepressant meds for approx 9-12 months, felt great 2015: fluoxetine, bad side effects, quit after two weeks 2015: escitalopram 15mg/day Summer 2019: attempted fast taper off escitalopram, reinstated to 15mg/day dose after six weeks • October 16, 2020: begin taper off escitalopram at rate of 1mg per 1 week (sometimes per 2 weeks) using 1mg/ml liquid from pharmacy • Jan 22, 2021: down to 3mg and holding due to worsening of WD symptoms • Feb 4, 2021: updose to 4mg holding • Feb 2021: tapering at 10% every 28 days Jul 2021: begin using microtaper of 2.5% per week Feb 2022: down to 1.43mg and experiencing worsening WD symptoms, updose to 1.45mg and holding • Mar 2022: resume microtaper schedule, lowest dose: 1.34 mg • Mar 2022: extended hold at 1.36 mg •Jul 2022: resume 10% taper • Apr 2-Jun 21, 2023 extended hold at 0.5mg • Jun 9, 2023 massive life stress situation triggered WD wave, Jun 15-16 took 5mg dose, Jun 17-21 back to 0.5mg dose • Jun 22 small updose to 0.58mg • Jul 1-2 tried 2.5mg, suffered adverse affects (anxiety, can’t eat, palpitations, electric jolts in chest) • Jul 1, 2023 - Jan 3, 2024 long hold at 1mg, slowly stabilizing after crash • Jan 4 resume taper  0.98mg - Jan 11 0.95mg - Jan 18 0.92mg - Jan 25 0.90mg -  May 13 0.81mg - Jun 23 0.73mg - Aug 7 0.66mg - Sep 8 0.59mg

 

Supplements: vitamin D3 with K2, vitamin C, iron, magnesium glycinate, EPA/DHA essentials fish oil, melatonin(as needed)

Other prescription meds: levothyroxine 75 mcg (for hypothyroidism), lorazepam 0.25 to 0.5mg (as needed, which is almost never), zofran 2 to 4mg (as needed) 

Link to comment

Also wanted to add that I’ve been having flu-like symptoms including body aches, exhaustion, and low-grade fever. Is this something related to WD, or more likely unrelated illness/virus? 
 

For context, I had a cold that lasted about 10-12 days, mostly just a lot of sinus congestion. It mostly cleared up and was feeling back to normal, then two days later I did my dose drop, then less than 24 hours later I got hit with body aches and a low grade fever. 

2013-2015: paroxetine, with brief switch to sertraline, and brief combo with bupropion  • 2015: got off all antidepressant meds for approx 9-12 months, felt great 2015: fluoxetine, bad side effects, quit after two weeks 2015: escitalopram 15mg/day Summer 2019: attempted fast taper off escitalopram, reinstated to 15mg/day dose after six weeks • October 16, 2020: begin taper off escitalopram at rate of 1mg per 1 week (sometimes per 2 weeks) using 1mg/ml liquid from pharmacy • Jan 22, 2021: down to 3mg and holding due to worsening of WD symptoms • Feb 4, 2021: updose to 4mg holding • Feb 2021: tapering at 10% every 28 days Jul 2021: begin using microtaper of 2.5% per week Feb 2022: down to 1.43mg and experiencing worsening WD symptoms, updose to 1.45mg and holding • Mar 2022: resume microtaper schedule, lowest dose: 1.34 mg • Mar 2022: extended hold at 1.36 mg •Jul 2022: resume 10% taper • Apr 2-Jun 21, 2023 extended hold at 0.5mg • Jun 9, 2023 massive life stress situation triggered WD wave, Jun 15-16 took 5mg dose, Jun 17-21 back to 0.5mg dose • Jun 22 small updose to 0.58mg • Jul 1-2 tried 2.5mg, suffered adverse affects (anxiety, can’t eat, palpitations, electric jolts in chest) • Jul 1, 2023 - Jan 3, 2024 long hold at 1mg, slowly stabilizing after crash • Jan 4 resume taper  0.98mg - Jan 11 0.95mg - Jan 18 0.92mg - Jan 25 0.90mg -  May 13 0.81mg - Jun 23 0.73mg - Aug 7 0.66mg - Sep 8 0.59mg

 

Supplements: vitamin D3 with K2, vitamin C, iron, magnesium glycinate, EPA/DHA essentials fish oil, melatonin(as needed)

Other prescription meds: levothyroxine 75 mcg (for hypothyroidism), lorazepam 0.25 to 0.5mg (as needed, which is almost never), zofran 2 to 4mg (as needed) 

Link to comment
  • Administrator

Hi @catmama

 

9 hours ago, catmama said:

I’ve been having flu-like symptoms including body aches, exhaustion, and low-grade fever. Is this something related to WD, or more likely unrelated illness/virus? 

 

Those symptoms are certainly on the WD checklist: Daily Checklist of Antidepressant Withdrawal Symptoms (PDF). Have a look at items 29-34.

 

If you were sick recently, it could also just be a hangover from that, but the proximity of the symptoms to your dose reduction points towards WD.

 

I hope things pick up for you soon.

Please don't send me PMs. I am not a doctor. My comments are based on my personal experience with ADs and tapering. Consult your doctor about your own medical decisions.

Start of taper: Jan ’22 Vortioxetine 15mg, 

End year 1: 4.5mg, 

End year 2: 2.38mg, 

Year 3: 8 Feb 2.19mg, 21 Mar 1.99mg, 2 May 1.83mg, 13 Jun 1.69mg, 25 Jul 1.50mg, 14 Aug 1.46mg, 3 Sep 1.43mg, 10 Sep 1.40mg, 17 Sep 1.37mg

Link to comment
  • Mentor
Posted (edited)
9 hours ago, catmama said:

Also wanted to add that I’ve been having flu-like symptoms including body aches, exhaustion, and low-grade fever. Is this something related to WD, or more likely unrelated illness/virus? 
 

For context, I had a cold that lasted about 10-12 days, mostly just a lot of sinus congestion. It mostly cleared up and was feeling back to normal, then two days later I did my dose drop, then less than 24 hours later I got hit with body aches and a low grade fever. 

 

Have you been tested for Covid?  Just another thought to throw in the mix.

Edited by Catina7

Disclaimer:  This is not professional medical advice but is based on personal experience only.

1994 - 2017:  Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Paxil, Wellbutrin, Zoloft, Seroquel, Buspar, Lorazepam, Xanax, Ambien

2005-present:  Trazodone 50 mg 

2017:  Effexor XR 37.5 >> 75 mg 

2020 (March):  Began 10% monthly taper of Effexor XR (got down to 12 mg)

2021 (September):  Completely crashed.  Went back up to 37.5 mg but I kindled myself

2024 (Avg. bead count per capsule is 111):  1/1:  -6  |  2/1:  -11  |  3/1:  -16  |   4/1:  -18  |   5/1:  -21   |   6/1  -25 |   7/1  HOLD |   8/1  -29  |   9/7  -33

Reasons for starting psych meds:  PMDD/Depression, Generalized Anxiety Disorder

Other medications:  Levothyroxine 75 mcg

Supplements:  Dr. Berg's Electrolyte Powder on occasion   

 

Never give up  Holding On with Patience & Endurance

Link to comment
13 hours ago, catmama said:

Also wanted to add that I’ve been having flu-like symptoms including body aches, exhaustion, and low-grade fever. Is this something related to WD, or more likely unrelated illness/virus? 
 

For context, I had a cold that lasted about 10-12 days, mostly just a lot of sinus congestion. It mostly cleared up and was feeling back to normal, then two days later I did my dose drop, then less than 24 hours later I got hit with body aches and a low grade fever. 

hello. yes i had them all in the beggining, ibelieve

they ll fade away. keep strong ❤️

2015 20mg lexapro 

2016 20mg attempt get off one month taper(doctor advice) xtreme terror and anxiety 

2016 again  20mg attempt get off extreme ocd and social fear as withdraws

2018 reduce to 10mg ocd visual snow fatigue couldn't learn

2022 10mg get off again one month taper(doctor advice) had reactions on it and inflammation markers... xtreme protracted  withdraws symptoms 

Link to comment

the body aches, fatigue and overall muscle stiffness are my most persistent symptom until this day

hope it gets better with time

Story in short:

  • Started Escitalopram 2017 May after health related issue and sleep troubles, 1mg Fluanxol as well.
  • June 2018 - off all medicaments (had mild withdrawal symptoms, probably because it was my first time and my body was not so dependent)
  • June 2019 - Lenuxin was discontinued, started 10mg Cipralex (escitalopram) due to work/education stress, 1mg Fluanxol
  • June 2020 - failed taper (1/2 doses + skipping)
  • December 2020 - March 2021 - withdrawals (headaches, nausea, tremor, anxiety, agoraphobia, insomnia)
  • March 2021 - re-instantiated 10mg Cipralex, 1mg Fluanxol
  • September 2021 - again failed taper (1/2 doses, but longer holds - 7months total and jump to 0 from 2.5mg)
  • April 2022 - off medicaments
  • May 2022 - withdrawal symptoms (severe insomnia - 1,2 hours broken sleep - and vomiting, nausea, daily headaches, brain zaps, anxiety, fatigue)
  • May 2022 - July 2022 - tried some things for sleep (Trazodone, Hedonin, Valeriana, Melatonin, 5-HTP - did not help)
  • Start of August 2022 - could not handle insomnia and vomiting - re-instantiated 5mg Cipralex, 1mg Fluanxol
  • End of August 2022 - added + 25mg Agomelatine (Valdoxan) for sleep. Started sleeping.
  • Start of October 2022 - up-dosed Cipralex to 10mg and tapered successfully Fluanxol (1mg -> 0.5mg -> 0mg from 18.10.2022 - no withdrawal effects)
  • Start of November 2022 - tapered successfully Valdoxan (25mg -> 12.5mg -> 0mg from 19.11.2022 - no withdrawal effects)

 

 

Current Cipralex/Lexapro Taper:

  • Today (December 2022) - left only on 10mg Cipralex (tablet).
  • 6 December 2022 - switching to liquid (5mg tablet, 5mg liquid)
  • 12 January 2023 - switching to liquid (10mg liquid = 0.5ml)
  • 1 March 2023 - taper dose (9mg escitalopram = 0.45ml in liquid)
  • 1 April 2023 - taper dose (8mg escitalopram = 0.4ml in liquid)
  • 20 May 2023 - taper dose (7.2mg escitalopram = 0.36ml in liquid)
  • 1 July 2023 - taper dose (6.4mg escitalopram = 0.32ml in liquid)
  • 1 Sept 2023 - taper dose (5.8mg escitalopram = 0.29ml in liquid)
  • 24 Sept 2023 - reinstated 6.4mg due to withdrawal symptoms (anxiety, panic, sleep disturbances, gastritis, nausea, very fatigued)
  • October 2023 - hold at 6.4mg - sleep issues gone, nausea/gastritis is better, manageable anxiety, left with fatigue/muscle weakness and aches and head tension
  • 1 Jan 2024 - still at 6.4mg - bad fatigue, body aches and muscle soreness + weakness, burping, easily triggered anxiety, hypersensitivity to sounds and some lights.
  • 21 March 2024 - decided to updose to 6.6mg to try to alleviate symptoms - first couple of days felt way better with massive improvement in physical symptoms - after 1 week became too activating and I needed to go back to 6.4
  • 29 March 2024 - back to 6.4mg after bad reaction to updosing
  • 19 April 2024 - taper to 6.2mg - first 10 days had some headaches and again felt a bit better, but on the 2 week mark noticed crying spells, physical symptoms worsened, nausea, gut issues, weakness.
  • 4 May 2024 - back to 6.4mg, decide to hold through summer.

Current symptoms: muscle pain, fatigue, inability to do anything exercise-wise except brief walks, teeth clenching, palpitations, tinnitus, mostly housebound

Link to comment

Thank you for the input everyone. Day three now with these symptoms and it’s worse today than yesterday. My fever is higher. So I do think it’s viral. I asked my dad about it, and he’s a PA, and he thinks viral as well. Unfortunately, my health insurance doesn’t start until July 1, so I can’t go to the doctor until next week. If anything gets really bad, I will go to the ER, but I’m hoping it won’t come to that. And hopefully with rest, fluids, and Tylenol it will get better on its own. I feel pretty miserable. Luckily my cat is laying on me now and healing me with her purrs and taking the chills away with her warmth. 

2013-2015: paroxetine, with brief switch to sertraline, and brief combo with bupropion  • 2015: got off all antidepressant meds for approx 9-12 months, felt great 2015: fluoxetine, bad side effects, quit after two weeks 2015: escitalopram 15mg/day Summer 2019: attempted fast taper off escitalopram, reinstated to 15mg/day dose after six weeks • October 16, 2020: begin taper off escitalopram at rate of 1mg per 1 week (sometimes per 2 weeks) using 1mg/ml liquid from pharmacy • Jan 22, 2021: down to 3mg and holding due to worsening of WD symptoms • Feb 4, 2021: updose to 4mg holding • Feb 2021: tapering at 10% every 28 days Jul 2021: begin using microtaper of 2.5% per week Feb 2022: down to 1.43mg and experiencing worsening WD symptoms, updose to 1.45mg and holding • Mar 2022: resume microtaper schedule, lowest dose: 1.34 mg • Mar 2022: extended hold at 1.36 mg •Jul 2022: resume 10% taper • Apr 2-Jun 21, 2023 extended hold at 0.5mg • Jun 9, 2023 massive life stress situation triggered WD wave, Jun 15-16 took 5mg dose, Jun 17-21 back to 0.5mg dose • Jun 22 small updose to 0.58mg • Jul 1-2 tried 2.5mg, suffered adverse affects (anxiety, can’t eat, palpitations, electric jolts in chest) • Jul 1, 2023 - Jan 3, 2024 long hold at 1mg, slowly stabilizing after crash • Jan 4 resume taper  0.98mg - Jan 11 0.95mg - Jan 18 0.92mg - Jan 25 0.90mg -  May 13 0.81mg - Jun 23 0.73mg - Aug 7 0.66mg - Sep 8 0.59mg

 

Supplements: vitamin D3 with K2, vitamin C, iron, magnesium glycinate, EPA/DHA essentials fish oil, melatonin(as needed)

Other prescription meds: levothyroxine 75 mcg (for hypothyroidism), lorazepam 0.25 to 0.5mg (as needed, which is almost never), zofran 2 to 4mg (as needed) 

Link to comment
  • Mentor
7 minutes ago, catmama said:

Luckily my cat is laying on me now and healing me with her purrs and taking the chills away with her warmth. 

 

Aww, nothing like a fur baby to help comfort you.  😻  I hope you feel better very soon!  

Disclaimer:  This is not professional medical advice but is based on personal experience only.

1994 - 2017:  Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Paxil, Wellbutrin, Zoloft, Seroquel, Buspar, Lorazepam, Xanax, Ambien

2005-present:  Trazodone 50 mg 

2017:  Effexor XR 37.5 >> 75 mg 

2020 (March):  Began 10% monthly taper of Effexor XR (got down to 12 mg)

2021 (September):  Completely crashed.  Went back up to 37.5 mg but I kindled myself

2024 (Avg. bead count per capsule is 111):  1/1:  -6  |  2/1:  -11  |  3/1:  -16  |   4/1:  -18  |   5/1:  -21   |   6/1  -25 |   7/1  HOLD |   8/1  -29  |   9/7  -33

Reasons for starting psych meds:  PMDD/Depression, Generalized Anxiety Disorder

Other medications:  Levothyroxine 75 mcg

Supplements:  Dr. Berg's Electrolyte Powder on occasion   

 

Never give up  Holding On with Patience & Endurance

Link to comment

I’m now on day six of low-grade fever and body aches. Also have broken out in a whole-body rash that looks a bit like chicken pox, but not nearly as itchy. I went to urgent care a couple days ago and the doc was very dismissive. I forgot to show her the rash because on that day, it wasn’t as prominent yet. She prescribed antibiotics. But I haven’t taken them yet because I don’t think I have a bacterial infection. I have no idea what’s wrong, and no idea if it’s withdrawal-related or not. All I know is that I feel terrible and it’s making me even more depressed. I can’t find any answers and I’m scared too. 

2013-2015: paroxetine, with brief switch to sertraline, and brief combo with bupropion  • 2015: got off all antidepressant meds for approx 9-12 months, felt great 2015: fluoxetine, bad side effects, quit after two weeks 2015: escitalopram 15mg/day Summer 2019: attempted fast taper off escitalopram, reinstated to 15mg/day dose after six weeks • October 16, 2020: begin taper off escitalopram at rate of 1mg per 1 week (sometimes per 2 weeks) using 1mg/ml liquid from pharmacy • Jan 22, 2021: down to 3mg and holding due to worsening of WD symptoms • Feb 4, 2021: updose to 4mg holding • Feb 2021: tapering at 10% every 28 days Jul 2021: begin using microtaper of 2.5% per week Feb 2022: down to 1.43mg and experiencing worsening WD symptoms, updose to 1.45mg and holding • Mar 2022: resume microtaper schedule, lowest dose: 1.34 mg • Mar 2022: extended hold at 1.36 mg •Jul 2022: resume 10% taper • Apr 2-Jun 21, 2023 extended hold at 0.5mg • Jun 9, 2023 massive life stress situation triggered WD wave, Jun 15-16 took 5mg dose, Jun 17-21 back to 0.5mg dose • Jun 22 small updose to 0.58mg • Jul 1-2 tried 2.5mg, suffered adverse affects (anxiety, can’t eat, palpitations, electric jolts in chest) • Jul 1, 2023 - Jan 3, 2024 long hold at 1mg, slowly stabilizing after crash • Jan 4 resume taper  0.98mg - Jan 11 0.95mg - Jan 18 0.92mg - Jan 25 0.90mg -  May 13 0.81mg - Jun 23 0.73mg - Aug 7 0.66mg - Sep 8 0.59mg

 

Supplements: vitamin D3 with K2, vitamin C, iron, magnesium glycinate, EPA/DHA essentials fish oil, melatonin(as needed)

Other prescription meds: levothyroxine 75 mcg (for hypothyroidism), lorazepam 0.25 to 0.5mg (as needed, which is almost never), zofran 2 to 4mg (as needed) 

Link to comment
  • Mentor
22 minutes ago, catmama said:

I’m now on day six of low-grade fever and body aches. Also have broken out in a whole-body rash that looks a bit like chicken pox, but not nearly as itchy. I went to urgent care a couple days ago and the doc was very dismissive. I forgot to show her the rash because on that day, it wasn’t as prominent yet. She prescribed antibiotics. But I haven’t taken them yet because I don’t think I have a bacterial infection. I have no idea what’s wrong, and no idea if it’s withdrawal-related or not. All I know is that I feel terrible and it’s making me even more depressed. I can’t find any answers and I’m scared too. 

 

Oh no, that sounds terrible...I'm sorry.  A doctor being dismissive?  C'mon now, I find that hard to believe lol.  And don't you just love how they throw an antibiotic at anything before they even know what's going on?  Anyway, you may want to have a look at the thread on skin issues.  Maybe you'll find some answers in there:

 

 

Disclaimer:  This is not professional medical advice but is based on personal experience only.

1994 - 2017:  Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Paxil, Wellbutrin, Zoloft, Seroquel, Buspar, Lorazepam, Xanax, Ambien

2005-present:  Trazodone 50 mg 

2017:  Effexor XR 37.5 >> 75 mg 

2020 (March):  Began 10% monthly taper of Effexor XR (got down to 12 mg)

2021 (September):  Completely crashed.  Went back up to 37.5 mg but I kindled myself

2024 (Avg. bead count per capsule is 111):  1/1:  -6  |  2/1:  -11  |  3/1:  -16  |   4/1:  -18  |   5/1:  -21   |   6/1  -25 |   7/1  HOLD |   8/1  -29  |   9/7  -33

Reasons for starting psych meds:  PMDD/Depression, Generalized Anxiety Disorder

Other medications:  Levothyroxine 75 mcg

Supplements:  Dr. Berg's Electrolyte Powder on occasion   

 

Never give up  Holding On with Patience & Endurance

Link to comment

@catmama could it be shingles?

 I am not a medical professional. My comments are based on my personal experience and information on this site. 

2016-twice weekly for a couple months-oxazepam 10 mg sleep/ 2020-22-once a week 3.75-7.5 mg for sleep/20 yr+ Paroxetine/ Dec2018-May 2022 20 mg/ May 2022 30mg/2022.07.28-2022.08.24 30mg to 0mg/ August 24-29 2022 10mg Prozac/2022.11.28-2022.12.04- 5mg Paroxetine/Dec 5&6/22 10mg Paroxetine/ Dec 8&9/22 10mg Prozac/ 2022.12.07 to 2023.07.01 5mg Paroxetine

TAPER 23.07.02-58mgpw/4.9mgai/ 23.07.21-4.8mg/23.07.28-4.73mg/23.08.04-4.65mg /21.09.23-4.58 mg/27.10.23-4.56 mg/5.12.23-4.54 mg/2.1.24-4.52 mg/9.1.24-4.51 mg/17.1.24-4.49 mg/26.1.24-4.47mg/6.2.24-4.46mg/ 19.2.24-4.44mg /4.4.24-4.43mg/28.4.24-4.4 mg/5.5.24-4.39 mg/19.5.24-4.36 mg/2.7.24-4.34 mg/9.7.24-4.32mg/31.7.24-4.3 mg/ 1.10.24 -4.29mg/

8am-probiotics/9am-paroxetine, 200mg mag bisglycinate/ 1000mg Vitamin D/5pm-75 mg DGL/200mg calcium citrate/0.25 mcg melatonin nightly

"... your strength will be in keeping calm..."-Isaiah 30:15

 

Link to comment
47 minutes ago, LostInCanada said:

@catmama could it be shingles?


I don’t think so. The rash isn’t painful. It looks like a bunch of mosquito bites and flea bites (size of the dots varies). It’s not any sort of bug bite though, and it’s not really itchy. It first appeared on my chest and neck, then spread out over the past two days from there all the way to my fingertips. I showed pics to my dad and he said it’s viral but didn’t elaborate beyond that. Very mysterious. 

2013-2015: paroxetine, with brief switch to sertraline, and brief combo with bupropion  • 2015: got off all antidepressant meds for approx 9-12 months, felt great 2015: fluoxetine, bad side effects, quit after two weeks 2015: escitalopram 15mg/day Summer 2019: attempted fast taper off escitalopram, reinstated to 15mg/day dose after six weeks • October 16, 2020: begin taper off escitalopram at rate of 1mg per 1 week (sometimes per 2 weeks) using 1mg/ml liquid from pharmacy • Jan 22, 2021: down to 3mg and holding due to worsening of WD symptoms • Feb 4, 2021: updose to 4mg holding • Feb 2021: tapering at 10% every 28 days Jul 2021: begin using microtaper of 2.5% per week Feb 2022: down to 1.43mg and experiencing worsening WD symptoms, updose to 1.45mg and holding • Mar 2022: resume microtaper schedule, lowest dose: 1.34 mg • Mar 2022: extended hold at 1.36 mg •Jul 2022: resume 10% taper • Apr 2-Jun 21, 2023 extended hold at 0.5mg • Jun 9, 2023 massive life stress situation triggered WD wave, Jun 15-16 took 5mg dose, Jun 17-21 back to 0.5mg dose • Jun 22 small updose to 0.58mg • Jul 1-2 tried 2.5mg, suffered adverse affects (anxiety, can’t eat, palpitations, electric jolts in chest) • Jul 1, 2023 - Jan 3, 2024 long hold at 1mg, slowly stabilizing after crash • Jan 4 resume taper  0.98mg - Jan 11 0.95mg - Jan 18 0.92mg - Jan 25 0.90mg -  May 13 0.81mg - Jun 23 0.73mg - Aug 7 0.66mg - Sep 8 0.59mg

 

Supplements: vitamin D3 with K2, vitamin C, iron, magnesium glycinate, EPA/DHA essentials fish oil, melatonin(as needed)

Other prescription meds: levothyroxine 75 mcg (for hypothyroidism), lorazepam 0.25 to 0.5mg (as needed, which is almost never), zofran 2 to 4mg (as needed) 

Link to comment

Hi @catmama

I'm sorry you've been feeling ill. Wishing you get some relief soon. 

Sending love and healing vibes,

Ariel 

 

1996-2018 - misc. polypharmacy, incl. SSRIs, SNRIs, neuroleptics, lithium, benzos, stimulants, antihistamines, etc. (approx. 30+ drugs)

2012-2018 - 10mg lexapro/escitalopram (20mg?)    Jan. 2018 - 10mg -> 5mg, then from 5mg -> 2.5mg, then 0mg  -->  July 2018 - 0mg

2017(?)-2020 - vyvanse/lisdexamfetamine 60-70mg    2020-2021 - 70mg down to 0mg  -->  July 2021 - 0mg

March-April 2021 - vortioxetine 5-10mg (approx. 7 weeks total; CT)  -->  April 28th, 2021 - 0mg

August 2021 - 2mg melatonin   August 1, 2022 - 1mg melatonin   March 31, 2023 - 0mg melatonin

2024 supplements update: electrolyte blend in water sipped throughout the day; 1 tsp cod liver oil blend (incl. vit. A+D+E) w/ breakfast; calcium; vitamin C+zinc

 

Courage is fear that has said its prayers.  - Karle Wilson Baker

love and justice are not two. without inner change, there can be no outer change; without collective change, no change matters.  - Rev. angel Kyodo williams

Holding multiple truths. Knowing that everyone has their own accurate view of the way things are.  - text on homemade banner at Afiya house

 

I am not a medical professional; this is not medical advice. 

Link to comment
On 6/29/2024 at 5:49 PM, catmama said:

I’m now on day six of low-grade fever and body aches. Also have broken out in a whole-body rash that looks a bit like chicken pox, but not nearly as itchy. I went to urgent care a couple days ago and the doc was very dismissive. I forgot to show her the rash because on that day, it wasn’t as prominent yet. She prescribed antibiotics. But I haven’t taken them yet because I don’t think I have a bacterial infection. I have no idea what’s wrong, and no idea if it’s withdrawal-related or not. All I know is that I feel terrible and it’s making me even more depressed. I can’t find any answers and I’m scared too. 

Hello sweetheart, as I mentioned the other day, do you think it's 5th disease? Don't let the name scare you....it's not anything to worry about, just let it run its course. Our elementary school had it going around towards the end of the school year. 

Just checking in on you. Love you and BIG HUGS ❤️

Chlo❤

•Celexa 40mg 1999-2021•LONG COVID Aug.2021•Celexa stopped working•Zoloft 100mg Sept21'-Oct21'•Buspar •Lexapro 10mg Oct21'-Nov21'

•Lexapro did not work(adverse effects)•Lexapro 5mg Nov21'-1/17/22 switched to Lexapro liquid form 5mg 1/18/22•4.75mg 1/19•4.5mg 1/25•4.25mg 2/1•4.0mg 2/8

•3.75mg 3/28•3.5mg 5/23

•3.25mg 5/30•3.0mg 6/19

•2.75mg 6/26•2.50mg 7/10•2.45mg 7/18•2.40mg 7/25•2.35mg 8/1•2.33mg 8/26•2.27mg 9/15•2.21mg 9/23•2.16mg 9/30•2.10mg 10/14•2.04mg 10/24•1.99mg 11/18•1.95mg 1/02/23•1.90mg 1/09•1.80mg 1/27•1.75mg 2/21•1.70mg3/6•1.65mg3/14•1.60mg 4/07•1.52mg 4/30•1.48mg 5/07•1.40mg 6/08•1.36mg 6/17•1.32mg 6/27•1.28mg 7/17•1.20mg 8/18•1.15mg 9/13•1.12mg 10/15•1.06mg 1/20/24•1.02mg 2/16•1mg 2/27•.98mg3/02•.96mg3/20•

.90mg7/1•.85mg8/17•

Magnesium Glycinate•Vit.C 

Omega3•Probiotic•Zinc•D3•

Mirtazapine 15mg

I don't know much, but 3 things I do. There is a God. His word is true. Stay close to Him and He will bring you through. Amen🙏

Link to comment

Thank you all for the well wishes. Whatever virus I had, it seems to be better now, thankfully. Fever finally went away on day seven and the rash has cleared up 90%. I feel completely exhausted and drained, but that feels more like WD than anything else. It’s been nine days since my last dose drop, and the previous drop took about two week for symptoms to level out. So I’m expecting a similar pattern with this drop too. Hoping, anyway. 

2013-2015: paroxetine, with brief switch to sertraline, and brief combo with bupropion  • 2015: got off all antidepressant meds for approx 9-12 months, felt great 2015: fluoxetine, bad side effects, quit after two weeks 2015: escitalopram 15mg/day Summer 2019: attempted fast taper off escitalopram, reinstated to 15mg/day dose after six weeks • October 16, 2020: begin taper off escitalopram at rate of 1mg per 1 week (sometimes per 2 weeks) using 1mg/ml liquid from pharmacy • Jan 22, 2021: down to 3mg and holding due to worsening of WD symptoms • Feb 4, 2021: updose to 4mg holding • Feb 2021: tapering at 10% every 28 days Jul 2021: begin using microtaper of 2.5% per week Feb 2022: down to 1.43mg and experiencing worsening WD symptoms, updose to 1.45mg and holding • Mar 2022: resume microtaper schedule, lowest dose: 1.34 mg • Mar 2022: extended hold at 1.36 mg •Jul 2022: resume 10% taper • Apr 2-Jun 21, 2023 extended hold at 0.5mg • Jun 9, 2023 massive life stress situation triggered WD wave, Jun 15-16 took 5mg dose, Jun 17-21 back to 0.5mg dose • Jun 22 small updose to 0.58mg • Jul 1-2 tried 2.5mg, suffered adverse affects (anxiety, can’t eat, palpitations, electric jolts in chest) • Jul 1, 2023 - Jan 3, 2024 long hold at 1mg, slowly stabilizing after crash • Jan 4 resume taper  0.98mg - Jan 11 0.95mg - Jan 18 0.92mg - Jan 25 0.90mg -  May 13 0.81mg - Jun 23 0.73mg - Aug 7 0.66mg - Sep 8 0.59mg

 

Supplements: vitamin D3 with K2, vitamin C, iron, magnesium glycinate, EPA/DHA essentials fish oil, melatonin(as needed)

Other prescription meds: levothyroxine 75 mcg (for hypothyroidism), lorazepam 0.25 to 0.5mg (as needed, which is almost never), zofran 2 to 4mg (as needed) 

Link to comment
  • 1 month later...

Checking in.

 

That last drop I wrote about was a serious doozy. I held that dose until after my 35th birthday for the next drop. It's been about two weeks since my drop from 0.73 to 0.66 and it's gone comparatively much better. I still had intensified yucky symptoms for about seven to ten days, but they were tolerable and seem to have subsided.

 

I just continue to feel so frustrated. My emotions are okay for the most part. But mind is not as quick and sharp as it used to be. I find that if I'm fatigued, it's especially hard to focus and think deeply. It makes me scared to one day return to work. I fear I won't be as good of an engineer. 

 

I feel physically disabled as well. The fatigue is just relentless. All I want to do is lie down. I fight through it as much as I can, but it's so exhausting. I don't workout like I used to. I don't socialize. I don't feel able to get a job even though I'm at the point now where I need one. I am also having POTS-like symptoms, which are uncomfortable and just make any type of chore or outing so much more work. And my parents are supportive, but they told me that if I run out of money, I can't move back in with them. So in a few months I may need to find another living situation as well. I am trying to start an online tutoring service but so far have struggled to find clients.

 

I also called a place to inquire about an adult autism assessment. It's something that I've been considering for a long time and finally decided to pursue it now that I have state-provided health insurance. I suspect that being autistic could be both causing some of the symptoms I attribute to WD and also making all actual WD symptoms feel so incredibly heavy and debilitating because of my innate hypersensitivity. 

 

I'm just full of so much anger and sorrow. Of course, not every moment is like this. But it's often. The things I want to do - fall in love, work a fulfilling job, travel, etc - just feel so out of reach.

2013-2015: paroxetine, with brief switch to sertraline, and brief combo with bupropion  • 2015: got off all antidepressant meds for approx 9-12 months, felt great 2015: fluoxetine, bad side effects, quit after two weeks 2015: escitalopram 15mg/day Summer 2019: attempted fast taper off escitalopram, reinstated to 15mg/day dose after six weeks • October 16, 2020: begin taper off escitalopram at rate of 1mg per 1 week (sometimes per 2 weeks) using 1mg/ml liquid from pharmacy • Jan 22, 2021: down to 3mg and holding due to worsening of WD symptoms • Feb 4, 2021: updose to 4mg holding • Feb 2021: tapering at 10% every 28 days Jul 2021: begin using microtaper of 2.5% per week Feb 2022: down to 1.43mg and experiencing worsening WD symptoms, updose to 1.45mg and holding • Mar 2022: resume microtaper schedule, lowest dose: 1.34 mg • Mar 2022: extended hold at 1.36 mg •Jul 2022: resume 10% taper • Apr 2-Jun 21, 2023 extended hold at 0.5mg • Jun 9, 2023 massive life stress situation triggered WD wave, Jun 15-16 took 5mg dose, Jun 17-21 back to 0.5mg dose • Jun 22 small updose to 0.58mg • Jul 1-2 tried 2.5mg, suffered adverse affects (anxiety, can’t eat, palpitations, electric jolts in chest) • Jul 1, 2023 - Jan 3, 2024 long hold at 1mg, slowly stabilizing after crash • Jan 4 resume taper  0.98mg - Jan 11 0.95mg - Jan 18 0.92mg - Jan 25 0.90mg -  May 13 0.81mg - Jun 23 0.73mg - Aug 7 0.66mg - Sep 8 0.59mg

 

Supplements: vitamin D3 with K2, vitamin C, iron, magnesium glycinate, EPA/DHA essentials fish oil, melatonin(as needed)

Other prescription meds: levothyroxine 75 mcg (for hypothyroidism), lorazepam 0.25 to 0.5mg (as needed, which is almost never), zofran 2 to 4mg (as needed) 

Link to comment
  • 4 weeks later...

I’m reaching my breaking point. I can’t do this anymore. Every drop, no matter how small, I feel terrible and am just essentially disabled for weeks. I eventually bounce back but never to 100%. Knowing that I’m going to have to repeat this cycle for perhaps a year or more is just unfathomable. How am I supposed to work, make a living, have a life, do anything when I’m nearly bed bound for one week every four weeks? I can’t do it anymore. I am really thinking about just jumping to zero and being done. I will ride the wave and then I won’t have to anymore. Tapering and holding is just not helping at all anymore. 

2013-2015: paroxetine, with brief switch to sertraline, and brief combo with bupropion  • 2015: got off all antidepressant meds for approx 9-12 months, felt great 2015: fluoxetine, bad side effects, quit after two weeks 2015: escitalopram 15mg/day Summer 2019: attempted fast taper off escitalopram, reinstated to 15mg/day dose after six weeks • October 16, 2020: begin taper off escitalopram at rate of 1mg per 1 week (sometimes per 2 weeks) using 1mg/ml liquid from pharmacy • Jan 22, 2021: down to 3mg and holding due to worsening of WD symptoms • Feb 4, 2021: updose to 4mg holding • Feb 2021: tapering at 10% every 28 days Jul 2021: begin using microtaper of 2.5% per week Feb 2022: down to 1.43mg and experiencing worsening WD symptoms, updose to 1.45mg and holding • Mar 2022: resume microtaper schedule, lowest dose: 1.34 mg • Mar 2022: extended hold at 1.36 mg •Jul 2022: resume 10% taper • Apr 2-Jun 21, 2023 extended hold at 0.5mg • Jun 9, 2023 massive life stress situation triggered WD wave, Jun 15-16 took 5mg dose, Jun 17-21 back to 0.5mg dose • Jun 22 small updose to 0.58mg • Jul 1-2 tried 2.5mg, suffered adverse affects (anxiety, can’t eat, palpitations, electric jolts in chest) • Jul 1, 2023 - Jan 3, 2024 long hold at 1mg, slowly stabilizing after crash • Jan 4 resume taper  0.98mg - Jan 11 0.95mg - Jan 18 0.92mg - Jan 25 0.90mg -  May 13 0.81mg - Jun 23 0.73mg - Aug 7 0.66mg - Sep 8 0.59mg

 

Supplements: vitamin D3 with K2, vitamin C, iron, magnesium glycinate, EPA/DHA essentials fish oil, melatonin(as needed)

Other prescription meds: levothyroxine 75 mcg (for hypothyroidism), lorazepam 0.25 to 0.5mg (as needed, which is almost never), zofran 2 to 4mg (as needed) 

Link to comment
6 hours ago, catmama said:

I’m reaching my breaking point. I can’t do this anymore. Every drop, no matter how small, I feel terrible and am just essentially disabled for weeks. I eventually bounce back but never to 100%. Knowing that I’m going to have to repeat this cycle for perhaps a year or more is just unfathomable. How am I supposed to work, make a living, have a life, do anything when I’m nearly bed bound for one week every four weeks? I can’t do it anymore. I am really thinking about just jumping to zero and being done. I will ride the wave and then I won’t have to anymore. Tapering and holding is just not helping at all anymore. 

 @catmama   I'm so sorry, sweetheart. Please understand that is just your wd brain talking to you. I'm here to tell you that you don't want to make that jump, even though it's less that 1mg, it's still a big jump. Have you tried micro tapering? Like .001 every 5 days? That's what I have been doing for the past 3 months and it seems to be working. You can hold a little longer if needed. Find your baseline once again, then go from there. Just a suggestion. You are doing so good and have came so far to mess it up and cause more pain on yourself by jumping. I know when your in the midst of a wave, it's pure hell. And then just hell when in wd normal. You've got this, sweetheart!! Remember, slow, low, and steady wins the race. I love you 💛

Chlo❤

•Celexa 40mg 1999-2021•LONG COVID Aug.2021•Celexa stopped working•Zoloft 100mg Sept21'-Oct21'•Buspar •Lexapro 10mg Oct21'-Nov21'

•Lexapro did not work(adverse effects)•Lexapro 5mg Nov21'-1/17/22 switched to Lexapro liquid form 5mg 1/18/22•4.75mg 1/19•4.5mg 1/25•4.25mg 2/1•4.0mg 2/8

•3.75mg 3/28•3.5mg 5/23

•3.25mg 5/30•3.0mg 6/19

•2.75mg 6/26•2.50mg 7/10•2.45mg 7/18•2.40mg 7/25•2.35mg 8/1•2.33mg 8/26•2.27mg 9/15•2.21mg 9/23•2.16mg 9/30•2.10mg 10/14•2.04mg 10/24•1.99mg 11/18•1.95mg 1/02/23•1.90mg 1/09•1.80mg 1/27•1.75mg 2/21•1.70mg3/6•1.65mg3/14•1.60mg 4/07•1.52mg 4/30•1.48mg 5/07•1.40mg 6/08•1.36mg 6/17•1.32mg 6/27•1.28mg 7/17•1.20mg 8/18•1.15mg 9/13•1.12mg 10/15•1.06mg 1/20/24•1.02mg 2/16•1mg 2/27•.98mg3/02•.96mg3/20•

.90mg7/1•.85mg8/17•

Magnesium Glycinate•Vit.C 

Omega3•Probiotic•Zinc•D3•

Mirtazapine 15mg

I don't know much, but 3 things I do. There is a God. His word is true. Stay close to Him and He will bring you through. Amen🙏

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

Terms of Use Privacy Policy