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NovaSouls Approaching 3 months Lexapro free, is the worst yet to come?

NovaSouls

By NovaSouls
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NovaSouls

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I went on Lexapro 10mg in October of 2020 after having a severe panic attack (caused by marijuana) that would not leave. I felt like I couldn’t breathe and had constant OCD thoughts of breathing. After waking up the next day with the same feeling, I went to the ER and then my doctor put me on 10mg of Lexapro. Within a few days I felt even more awful, so my dr told me to go to 20mg. Slowly that worked. I can’t remember specifics but the panic attacks finally stopped months and months later. I went to therapy as well and learned some techniques. It worked really well for me for over 2 years. Then one day my sister visited and said I seemed off, almost “too chill” and numb. This opened my eyes to the (lack of) feelings I had and were overlooking. I decided in November 2022 that I would begin to taper and hopefully get off completely. I was able to manage my anxiety now and simply think away panic attacks. The ED and weight gain were HUGE factors in why I ultimately decided I wanted off. This was my taper:


20mg 11/2020

 

Taper started, 15mg - 11/16/22

 

10mg - 11/30/22

 

7.5mg - 1/24/22

 

5mg - 2/26/22

 

2.5 mg - 3/12/22

 

0 mg - 4/9/23

 

I felt great at 15mg. I was angry a lot though, but it felt good to feel. 10mg I felt fine as well.

 

Around 7.5mg is where I could cry at movies again, but also when anxiety somewhat felt more real, I was in my head a lot about what I should be expecting. Read horror stories online and what not.

 

At 0mg I felt very depressed for a couple of weeks and the depression caused anxiety. It came and went though. However 3 weeks in, my breathing OCD came back and it was very upsetting. No panic, just annoyed at the intrusive thoughts. About 2 months in panic started to show. 2.5 months in I had a couple full panic attacks and I am now every day fighting that general anxious feeling.

 

I’m back to the feelings I had that made me take Lexapro in the first place. EVERY time I get anxious I wonder if I should start Lexapro again. Part of me wonders if I’m just a panic prone/ocd kinda person, and now that the Lexapro is out of my system my symptoms are back, or if this is also withdrawal still. I read online that symptoms get WORSE 3 months out and I am truly terrified and very close to starting Lexapro again if it gets worse than this, despite having made it almost 3 months sober from it.

Lexapro History


10/2020 - 10mg

11/2020 - increased to 20mg

 

11/16/22 - tapered to 15mg

11/30/22 - tapered to 10mg

1/24/22 - tapered to 7.5mg

2/26/22 - tapered to 5mg

3/12/22 - tapered to 2.5 mg

4/9/23 - 0mg completely off

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Onmyway Grand Master

Onmyway

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Hi @NovaSouls, 

welcome to SA. 

You are NOT a panic/OCD prone person - you just messed with your brain first with marijuana and then with lexapro and your brain had a reaction. 

 

I am not sure why you attribute your recovery to lexapro rather than the passage of time from the marijuana incident or the techniques you learned in therapy. If it was lexapro that helped you, it would have done much sooner than months and months. These drugs are not very effective in general - here is an article that talks about it: 

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4172306/

 

What you are experiencing now is withdrawal symptoms from stopping lexapro. You may wish to reinstate a small dose and see if that will help with the symptoms. You can then slowly taper off that dose. While you did not experience WD at the higher doses, these drugs are more potent at the lower doses anyway. Here is the Lancet paper that discusses that. 

https://markhorowitz.org/academic-paper/tapering-of-ssri-treatment-to-mitigate-withdrawal-symptoms/

 

Pls let us know if you decide to reinstate and we will make a recommendation on what reinstatement dosage may be best. 

 

 

"Nothing so small as a moment is insurmountable, and moments are all that we have. You have survived every trial and tribulation that life has thrown at you up until this very instant. When future troubles come—and they will come—a version of you will be born into that moment that can conquer them, too." - Kevin Koenig 

 

I am not a doctor and this should not be considered medical advice. You can use the information and recommendations provided in whatever way you want and all decisions on your treatment are yours. 

 

In the next few weeks I do not have a lot of capacity to respond to questions. If you need a quick answer pls tag or ask other moderators who may want to be tagged. 

 

Aug  2000 - July 2003 (ct, 4-6 wk wd) , citalopram 20 mg,  xanax prn, wellbutrin for a few months, trazodone prn 

Dec 2004 - July 2018 citalopram 20 mg, xanax prn (rarely used)

Aug 2018 - citalopram 40 mg (self titrated up)

September 2018 - January 2019 tapered citalopram - 40/30/20/10/5 no issues until a week after reaching 0

Feb 2019 0.25 xanax - 0.5/day (3 weeks) over to klonopin 0.25 once a day to manage severe wd

March 6, reinstated citalopram 2.5 mg (liquid), klonopin 0.25 mg for sleep 2-3 times a week

Apr 1st citalopram 2.0 mg (liquid), klonopin 0.25 once a week (off by 4/14/19- no tapering)

citalopram (liquid) 4/14/19 -1.8 mg, 5/8/19 - 1.6 mg,  7/27/19 -1.5 mg,  8/15/19 - 1.35, 2/21/21 - 1.1 (smaller drops in between), 6/20/21 - 1.03 mg, 8/7/21- 1.025, 8/11/21 - 1.02, 8/15/21 - 1.015, 9/3/21 - 0.925 (fingers crossed!), 10/8/21 - 0.9, 10/18/21 - 0.875, 12/31/21 - 0.85, 1/7/22 - 0.825, 1/14/22 - 0.8, 1/22/22 - 0.785, 8/18/22 - 0.59, 12/15/2022 - 0.48, 2/15/22 - 0.43, 25/07/23 - 0.25 (mistake), 6/08/23 - 0.33mg

 

Supplements: magnesium citrate and bi-glycinate

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NovaSouls Newbie

NovaSouls

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1 hour ago, Onmyway said:

Hi @NovaSouls, 

welcome to SA. 

You are NOT a panic/OCD prone person - you just messed with your brain first with marijuana and then with lexapro and your brain had a reaction. 

 

I am not sure why you attribute your recovery to lexapro rather than the passage of time from the marijuana incident or the techniques you learned in therapy. If it was lexapro that helped you, it would have done much sooner than months and months. These drugs are not very effective in general - here is an article that talks about it: 

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4172306/

 

What you are experiencing now is withdrawal symptoms from stopping lexapro. You may wish to reinstate a small dose and see if that will help with the symptoms. You can then slowly taper off that dose. While you did not experience WD at the higher doses, these drugs are more potent at the lower doses anyway. Here is the Lancet paper that discusses that. 

https://markhorowitz.org/academic-paper/tapering-of-ssri-treatment-to-mitigate-withdrawal-symptoms/

 

Pls let us know if you decide to reinstate and we will make a recommendation on what reinstatement dosage may be best. 

 

 

Thank you, I’ll check out these references. It appears that whatever the THC did to my brain, Lexapro helped for a little but now that I quit both Lexapro and THC, my brain is just going wild. Is it safe to say I can expect symptoms to be even worse as I enter month 3?

Lexapro History


10/2020 - 10mg

11/2020 - increased to 20mg

 

11/16/22 - tapered to 15mg

11/30/22 - tapered to 10mg

1/24/22 - tapered to 7.5mg

2/26/22 - tapered to 5mg

3/12/22 - tapered to 2.5 mg

4/9/23 - 0mg completely off

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Onmyway Grand Master

Onmyway

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  • Moderator
Posted

Hard to predict. You may wish to read up on the 'windows and waves' pattern. Have a look at the Symptoms and Self Care Forum. It has a lot of helpful info. 

"Nothing so small as a moment is insurmountable, and moments are all that we have. You have survived every trial and tribulation that life has thrown at you up until this very instant. When future troubles come—and they will come—a version of you will be born into that moment that can conquer them, too." - Kevin Koenig 

 

I am not a doctor and this should not be considered medical advice. You can use the information and recommendations provided in whatever way you want and all decisions on your treatment are yours. 

 

In the next few weeks I do not have a lot of capacity to respond to questions. If you need a quick answer pls tag or ask other moderators who may want to be tagged. 

 

Aug  2000 - July 2003 (ct, 4-6 wk wd) , citalopram 20 mg,  xanax prn, wellbutrin for a few months, trazodone prn 

Dec 2004 - July 2018 citalopram 20 mg, xanax prn (rarely used)

Aug 2018 - citalopram 40 mg (self titrated up)

September 2018 - January 2019 tapered citalopram - 40/30/20/10/5 no issues until a week after reaching 0

Feb 2019 0.25 xanax - 0.5/day (3 weeks) over to klonopin 0.25 once a day to manage severe wd

March 6, reinstated citalopram 2.5 mg (liquid), klonopin 0.25 mg for sleep 2-3 times a week

Apr 1st citalopram 2.0 mg (liquid), klonopin 0.25 once a week (off by 4/14/19- no tapering)

citalopram (liquid) 4/14/19 -1.8 mg, 5/8/19 - 1.6 mg,  7/27/19 -1.5 mg,  8/15/19 - 1.35, 2/21/21 - 1.1 (smaller drops in between), 6/20/21 - 1.03 mg, 8/7/21- 1.025, 8/11/21 - 1.02, 8/15/21 - 1.015, 9/3/21 - 0.925 (fingers crossed!), 10/8/21 - 0.9, 10/18/21 - 0.875, 12/31/21 - 0.85, 1/7/22 - 0.825, 1/14/22 - 0.8, 1/22/22 - 0.785, 8/18/22 - 0.59, 12/15/2022 - 0.48, 2/15/22 - 0.43, 25/07/23 - 0.25 (mistake), 6/08/23 - 0.33mg

 

Supplements: magnesium citrate and bi-glycinate

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  • Altostrata changed the title to NovaSouls Approaching 3 months Lexapro free, is the worst yet to come?
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Altostrata Grand Master

Altostrata

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Hello, @NovaSouls, how are you doing?

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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