MissPettigrew: JAM - just about managing off ADs

[MissPettigrew]

Hi everyone at SA,

 

So glad to have found this organisation and many thanks to all involved. You are a lifesaver!

 

I have been on and off antidepressants for over 20 years (I am 62). I've experienced a lot of situational 'life things' (bereavement etc.) that led my GP to diagnosing me with depression and putting me on antidepressants. Most recently I've been on Duloxetine (20mg). I decided that I wanted to come off of it, partly because my life has been on a reasonably even-keel over the last year, and because I didn't want to be dependant on medication for the rest of my life. I'm a teacher so summer is a good time to heal. The psychiatric nurse at my GP practice told me to just go 'cold turkey' (she knew nothing about tapering). That was 3 weeks ago. The first week I had brain zaps, tinnitus, dizziness and diarrhoea - but it was tolerable. I actually felt surprisingly upbeat and positive in that first week. My husband was supportive and I spent lots of time doing nice things - gardening, being with horses, reading. I have found the last 2 weeks more difficult, but I am just about managing. The brain zaps, tinnitus, dizziness and diarrhoea are mostly gone, but I am VERY emotional. I have frequent ups and downs and periods of incandescent rage - real red mist stuff. I am also remembering what its like to actually cry, and I feel like crying a lot (I never cried while on ADs which always struck me as disturbing). I also have moments where I notice things in the garden that I don't think I've seen before, and appreciate my life and all its boring details in ways that I didn't before. So good days and bad days! Another interesting side effect is that I am noticing more osteoarthritic pain (knackered knees) than before. Duloxetine apparently helps with pain in some studies.

 

As noted above, I didn't know about tapering, which is why I went cold turkey on the advice of my clinician. I have only just found about SA (after watching a Panorama documentary on the BBC). Now that I'm 3 weeks into 0 meds and 'just about managing' I am going to try to stick with it (the forum might have thoughts on this ...  ) You will see in my signature that I also went cold Turkey in 2021 (Duloxetine 20 mg). I managed okay over the summer but when I went back to work I couldn't handle the anxiety. The difference was that we were in the middle of the pandemic then, so there was A LOT of stress at work and at home. The psychiatric nurse strongly suggested I go back on the meds and I agreed. But it felt like a defeat and I resented being made to feel that I just had a accept that I would be on ADs for the rest of my life. So here we go again ... hoping this time I can manage it. 

 

That's me - thanks to the community for all the support and good luck everyone in getting off ADs!!

 

 

Edited July 9, 2023 by manymoretodays
name to topic title

[Shep]

Hi, @MissPettigrew 

 

Welcome to Surviving Antidepressants. 

 

On 7/8/2023 at 12:01 PM, MissPettigrew said:

The psychiatric nurse at my GP practice told me to just go 'cold turkey' (she knew nothing about tapering). That was 3 weeks ago.

 

Being just 3 weeks off, you may want to reinstate. The full brunt of withdrawal is delayed for a lot of people. I'm going to leave you the information for reinstating, as well as tapering and other helpful links to read through. 

 

About reinstating and stabilizing to reduce withdrawal symptoms

 

Tips for tapering off duloxetine (Cymbalta)

 

Why taper by 10% of my dosage?

 

The Windows and Waves Pattern of Stabilization

 

How psychiatric drugs remodel your brain

 

Healing from antidepressants. Patterns of recovery video (4 minutes)

 

Please consider reinstating. You may not need to reinstate at the full 20 mg that you went cold turkey off of.  I'm not familiar with duloxetine enough to recommend a reinstatement dose, so I'm going to ask the other staff members to weigh in.

 

Please continue using this thread to document your taper and recovery and to ask questions. 

[Onmyway]

Hi @MissPettigrew, 

so sorry that you are dealing with these withdrawal effects. As Shep has already noted, the harm reduction option for you would be to try to reinstate so that you don't get into more severe withdrawal over time. I would suggest that you go to a dose of 15mg, stabilize on it for a few weeks/months and then taper off slowly. If you taper off very slowly (10% of previous dose every 4 weeks) you may not need summer vacation. This will take years to come off of the drugs but you should feel quite normal during those years. Please have a look at the links that Shep has posted and keep us updated on how you do whether you decide to reinstate or not. 

 

OMW

[MissPettigrew]

Hi Shep and Onmyway,

 

Thanks so much for taking the time to reply. I'm still JAM - just about managing! It's been okay so far, but I am obviously wary given my history and also your experience of withdrawal getting worse over time. I am reluctant to go back on the ADs just now - so will hang in a bit longer. If I hit the buffers I will let you know!! 

 

It's great to know that you guys have my back. I will keep you posted!

 

Miss Pettigrew

[Shep]

@MissPettigrew Are you reluctant to go back on this drug because you feel that you would have failed coming off? Please note that reinstating isn't a failure, but rather a strategy. The goal is the undo some of the damage caused by a too-rapid taper or a cold turkey. If you break your ankle, you use crutches as a way of aiding your ankle in healing. Adding in a bit of duloxetine would simply serve the purpose of being a set of crutches to aid your traumatized nervous system. There's no shame or failure in that. It's doing what is best to take care of yourself until you heal. 

 

Please note the further out you are from coming off this drug, the more risky a reinstatement is. 

[MissPettigrew]

Thanks Shep! I am grateful for the advice. I honestly don’t think it would be a failure to go back on the meds and it’s definitely an option. For now, the withdrawal is totally manageable  - week 1-2 was tricky but I.was ‘functional’ and able to continue with everyday living. That is why I’m just going with the flow for now. I will take stock regularly and report back. I’ve been here before - I  went off Duloxetine (20mg) cold turkey in 2021 for 3 months over summer - similar withdrawal experience to now.  I decided to go back on in the autumn because of pandemic related stress at work and home (was talked into it by my clinician)  but kind of wish I had just stuck with being off the drugs. Anyway, thanks again for the advice and help - so wonderful to know folks are out there who care. All best to everyone reading this forum!