Introduction / the absolute poison that is Amitriptyline

[Phillipschill]

Hello there, 

 

My name is Phil and I’m 31 years old. My pharmaceutical journey began in October 2020. I began to experience random waves of nausea, indigestion, dizziness and anxiety out of no where. So, I figured I’d seek help. I went to a clinic, and they ran a bunch of tests. They decided that my anxiety is the culprit, so they gave me a script for Celexa. I took the 10mg and later that night I went to the ER from sheer fear that I was about to die. Safe to say, I gave up Celexa and moved on to “the next best thing” which in their mind was Mirtazapine. I will admit, Mirt gave me the most sound sleep I’ve ever experienced in my life. But that’s about as far as Mirt did for me. It gave me brutal anxiety and panic attacks during the day, and beautiful sleep during the night. Kinda ironic. 

 

Eventually the clinic gave me a referral to see a gastroenterologist. From there, I had a series of tests done that left the GI with no answers. He decided to diagnose me with the umbrella term of “functional Dyspepsia”. Basically they give you this diagnosis when they can’t find anything wrong with you. 

Shortly after my “diagnosis”, he chose to put me on Amitriptyline for my “nerve pain” So I transitioned from Mirtazapine to Amitriptyline very quickly. It was a bumpy few weeks, but I eventually stabilized on 10mg amitriptyline. They told me it would take up to 6-8 months to see any benefits from Amitriptyline; so I gave them the benefit of the doubt. I waited. I suffered and told myself that it’ll eventually get better. 

Fast forward to today and I feel like I’m going to war with myself everyday. I am now a slave to Amitriptyline. I have attempted to self-ween myself from this poison and I have been humbled by the drug multiple times. I don’t remember my experience coming from 10mg to 5mg, but this time around trying to get to 2.5mg has been the most brutal thing I’ve ever encountered. I’m currently in the throes of my most recent attempt to ween to 2.5mg. 

Im currently experiencing grotesque GI symptoms that include violent waves of nausea, cramping, diarrhea, constipation, 0% appetite, etc. As far as the mental aspect goes, I don’t think I can even put into words what the last few weeks have been like. I’m in constant loops of what feels like psychotic episodes. Ranging from severe panic attacks, paranoia, derealization, depersonalization, suicidal ideation, insomnia, night terrors and self isolation. 

I am truly at a loss, and I know that this is Amitriptyline’s doing. I have felt these things in the past from attempting a ween, but this time around has been very violent. I’ve had to take a leave of absence at work, and I’ve been bed ridden for about two weeks now attempting to stabilize on 2.5mg. Every night when it’s time to take the pill, I battle with myself. It’s either I continue down the path of the 2.5mg or attempt to re-stabilize myself on 5mg. 

Im feeling very lost at the moment and was hoping for some type of guidance here. 

If you chose to read my story, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. 

[Onmyway]

Hi @Phillipschill

Please consider going back to 5mg and once you are stable you can start weaning more gradually. Since it's been less than 3 weeks this updosing has a better chance of working.

 

You should feel better within a week. Please keep notes on how you feel. This kind of suffering when you have the option to go back is not necessary and with the physical symptoms you're describing could be dangerous to your health. Hope you are keeping hydrated and safe.

 

OMW

[SurreyGuy]

Hi @Phillipschill, I have just read your story and can relate to so many of the things you've written about! As @Onmyway suggests, you probably went too fast with your tapering... I will tag you and follow your progression. Hang in there. And yes, amitriptyline is a poison...

[Katerina]

@Phillipschill sorry that you suffer with Amitr. To be honest I am not surpriced because I made several attempts to come off off it and several times I ended in hospital with undiagnosed withdrawal syndrome. I tapered 35mg of Amitr for more than 2 years. Now I have been 1 year off and still have wd symptoms. 
 

You wrote this in July… how are you now? Have you upped the dose back to 5mg? Amitr is very potent antidepressant and is challenging to come off off it. I failed 3 times untill I made it. But it was and still is hard and I am far from functioning somewhere like normally 😢. 
 

I made 2% cuts from previous dose weekly. But had to hold for many weeks during my taper many times because wd´s were heavy and life threatening. 
 

People do succeed with liquid ami… unfortunatelly in my country there are only 25mg tablets. No liquid, no smaller tablets. I made dry cut method the whole time, with knife and scale. 
 

Be prepared for hard days with a lot of physical problems. There are a lot of advice here how to “live” in wd.