Lisauk: SSRIs for 30 years

[Lisauk]

Hi I’m sorry if I’m posting this in the wrong place. I can’t really work out how this forum works on my phone. 
 

I’ve been on and off (mostly on) SSRIs for 30 years. Each time I come off I end up going back on after a few months - a year ish. This time I’ve been off just over a year, and now I’m back at the same place - depression, constant anxiety, feeling like I’m about to die or faint or explode or go completely insane. Totally think I have dementia - like my brain doesn’t work properly. I can’t think properly how to say things, I feel confused, detached, like I’m not me, constantly terrified. 
 

Half of me feels like I should persevere - maybe a point will come where I start to improve. But the other half of me thinks I should just go back on them, because I’m just getting steadily worse. Can hardly leave the house again now, too anxious to see people. It’s just horrendous. I’ve tried a few supplements but nothing helps even a bit. 
 

I don’t understand windows and waves because I feel this bad all the time. I didn’t even feel that much better on them but I could at least function a bit, and the anxiety wasn’t so crippling. 
 

Can anyone please advise? I really don’t know what to do at all. I’m so upset and desperate. Do I keep going or do I go back on them? Each time I’ve come off I’ve tapered slowly but i always end up back here again. 
 

Please can anyone help? 😢😢😢

Edited August 24, 2023 by FireflyFyte

[FireflyFyte]

Hi Lisauk,

 

You are posting in the correct place.

 

For us to help, could you list your recent drug history with start dates and dosages?

 

At a year off, reinstating may help but may not. You can read more about reinstating at - About reinstating and stabilizing to reduce withdrawal symptoms. If you decide to reinstate, you would want to do so with a very small dose. I will confer with other moderators to determine an appropriate amount for Sertraline.

[Lisauk]

Thank you so much - I have added as much as I can to my signature, but I didn't keep any records pre 2015.

I have always been at my best on meds. Every time I come off I end up here - anxious, depressed, can't go out. Makes me think that the answer is just to be on them, BUT I know they are damaging long-term. But surely being in this constant state mentally is also bad long-term?

[FireflyFyte]

Thank you for updating your signature.

 

We are a site dedicated to safely tapering off from psychiatric drugs. If your decision is to go back on medication, that is fully within your right but is not something we can advise on.

 

You may want to read about The Windows and Waves Pattern of Stabilization as well as Hypersensitivity and Kindling.

[Lisauk]

I understand, thank you. I don't want to go back on them as I've been so long off now. I just don't know what I can do at this point to be able to manage. I've read a lot on this site, including info about windows and waves, but it just doesn't seem to match with me, as the way I feel is constant.

[FireflyFyte]

13 minutes ago, Lisauk said:

I understand, thank you. I don't want to go back on them as I've been so long off now. I just don't know what I can do at this point to be able to manage. I've read a lot on this site, including info about windows and waves, but it just doesn't seem to match with me, as the way I feel is constant.

 

I have asked for assistance with other moderators to see if a reinstatement of a small amount of setraline would make sense in your case.

 

You might also want to read about Protracted Withdrawal or PAWS (post-acute withdrawal syndrome) - How long does it last? and see if it applies to you.

 

 

[Altostrata]

On 8/24/2023 at 8:20 AM, Lisauk said:

....

Every time I come off I end up here - anxious, depressed, can't go out. Makes me think that the answer is just to be on them, BUT I know they are damaging long-term. But surely being in this constant state mentally is also bad long-term?

 

@Lisauk this is a very common pattern for withdrawal syndrome. That awfulness you felt was withdrawal. Just about everyone here has been told by their doctors that it's relapse.

 

How has your symptom pattern changed in the last 3 months? How's your sleep?

[Lisauk]

Hi thank you for the reply. The symptoms are just getting worse. I just feel gradually more anxious and weird. Even just being with my family or being at home. And I can’t go out now. In the past I’ve felt pretty ok at home. Now I’m just anxious all the time wherever I am. It’s unbearable. My sleep is the one thing that’s ok. I’ve never suffered with insomnia. I’m tired all the time so I could sleep loads if I let myself. I just want to feel a bit ok again 😢

[Altostrata]

You may wish to try a reinstatement of 1mg sertraline, to see what it does at a low dose, which may be enough to reduce the symptoms. Sertraline comes in liquid form in the UK. See

 

What is withdrawal syndrome? 
 
About reinstating and stabilizing to reduce withdrawal symptoms 
 
The Windows and Waves Pattern of Stabilization

 

How do you talk to a doctor about tapering and withdrawal?

 

PRINT OUT leaflet: Guidance on stopping antidepressants by UK's Royal College of Psychiatrists

 

Please let us know how you're doing. 

[Lisauk]

Thank you, I will read these. I'd like to give 1mg a try, but I don't know how I would get the liquid form. I can't even get an appointment to see my doctor, let alone get persuade them to prescribe it. 

[Altostrata]

This will tell you how to make your own liquid from a tablet Tips for tapering off sertraline (Zoloft)

 

Please let us know how you're doing. 

[Lisauk]

Thank you so much.