Hawesome's Lexapro recovery

[Hawesome]

What a Journey it has been...

History: 

• Start - 2 months

I started Lexapro January 13th of this year due to having anxiety for nearly 10 days strait, it was a gradual build up and more than likely cannabis induced. I was scared, and desperate so decided to take Lexapro even though my wife told me not to. The first dose of only 2.5  milligrams started the nightmare to come. Within 4 hours I had heart palpitations and would break out into a sweat for what felt like no reason at all. I took a total of 4 doses of 2.5mg's until I decided to get off of the medication. Over the next 2 months I lost 20% of my body weight, extreme insomnia, bubble feeling all over my body especially my legs, resting heart rate of 80-110 for what felt like no reason at all (usually 58),  massive heart palpitations to the point I could feel my pulse in my feet, Tinnitus,  and many other symptoms. I thought my life was over, I was scared to talk to the doctor because she only wanted to give me more drugs. I decided to buckle down and ride it out, and put my faith into God.
 

• 3 - 4 Months

Were things getting worse? I couldn't tell what was up or down, am I broken? Some days felt better, then a massive wave would swoop in. I did notice that my appetite would come and go in windows and I was able to gain some weight back. Sleep would slowly improve in this span of time however, I had to take Unisom off and on.  I would get 2 nights of some type of sleep then one night of insomnia. This is when the sleep zaps started to swing in hard. As soon as I drifted off, I would get hit with what felt like  lightning all over my body then go into a sweating fit, then it would follow with fear and strong palpitations. At this point I hadn't found SA so my mind was going wild, I had nothing to ground myself in and simply thought this was my life moving forward. I hard to fight hard not to think suicidal. I would just be up in the middle of the night and look at pictures of my wife and kids from the years past and think I would never feel that type of  happy again. But I would pray and He would tell me to not give up, healing was coming
 

• 5 - 6 Months

This is when I was able to tell myself I was getting better, I would have half days here and there and feel totally normal. In those moments I really told myself to put it into memory (see you are getting better! don't forget this moment). In those moments, when they would come, I started researching online and found this amazing site SA. I  would read everything, the bad, the recoveries, the plan of a action, what Windows and  Waves were, how to coach your spouse through your recover. I HAD A MAP FORWARD! I got on Magnesium that night, and had the first night of sleep without palpitations! They still came and went in the coming months, but just getting moments without them nearly brought me to tears... This was when I started to really  notice improvement. God bless this site, and thank you everyone for sharing your suffering and progress
 

• 7 Months - Today

Right at the 7 month mark I got a nasty wave, not nearly as bad as the worst days however, I was just getting exhausted of it coming and going. I was ready for the end, but I never gave up. I had a big vacation planned with my little family and really wanted to show them an amazing time, and this wave needed to end before we left in a few days. All I could do was wait and see. The car ride down was so hard, but I never let my family see my suffering, I had to deliver. By the grace of God, once we arrived and we ate dinner, something happened. A weight was lifted off my heart, and I felt a huge shift. I was able to let go and enjoy myself, laugh, play with the kids, smile at my wife while she was cooking dinner, and even enjoy a beer! This marked my big turning point, I wasn't 100% but a big step took place. After vacation I still had little waves here and there, but all manageable.  And today I'm happy to be typing this in a great mood and symptom free! My story isn't over, I have more to go, waves will still come but I can now see the light at the end of the tunnel and had to share my story. 

Vitamins and Supplements 

• Magnesium (CVS Brand, 400mlg)
• Taurine 100mg

 

Medication History

• Lexapro 2.5mlg for 4 days, then Cold Turnkey

[getofflex]

Hello, and welcome to SA.  We are a volunteer-run community of people who have been or are getting off of psychiatric drugs.  First off, I can tell by your post that you are a stellar and amazing husband and father.  I'm very sorry that you had this severe bad reaction to Lexapro right away.  However, I'm glad that you stopped taking it right away.  

 

The symptoms of an immediate adverse reaction are pretty much the same as those of withdrawal.  The good news for you is that your recovery should be pretty quick, relatively speaking, compared to those of us who were on the drug for a period of time, and became dependent upon it.  

 

I strongly suggest that you avoid cannabis in the future, as well as other mind altering drugs and substances.  You may want to avoid alcohol for now, although it sounds like in your case the beer didn't cause you any problems.  I would at least go pretty light on the alcohol for a while.  

 

Here is information about immediate adverse reaction, which you had: 

 

Immediate Adverse Reaction

 

This link will go into all the various factors affecting our recovery.  

 

How Long is Withdrawal Going to Take?

 

You may also want to try some omega-3 supplements. 

 

Omega 3 Fish Oil

 

Here are some other links that may be helpful to you: 

 

 

Video on Recovery from Psych Drugs

 

Windows and Waves Pattern of Stabilization

 

Non Drug Ways to Cope with Withdrawal Symptoms

 

Please keep us posted and let us know how you are doing.  Keep up the good work!  

 

 

Edited August 25, 2023 by getofflex

[Hawesome]

Thank you so much for your reply @getofflex, I can't tell you how it feels to have someone respond to what has happened to me and actually understands. Congrats on your progress, and thank you for staying on the site and helping the poor souls who have been harmed.

Thank you for your kind words, my wife and children are how I made it out alive, and when I read that, it made me very emotional (happy).  I'm going to review the research you have shared and show my wife the suggestions on those supplements, I'm always looking to optimize. Oh yeah, and I agree on the drinking. I have a 3 beer limit as long as it's before dinner, but I was leaning on it to much. I drank every day for maybe 3 weeks strait (usually 2 beers before dinner) just to take the edge off. I have stopped that as of 2 days ago, and I'm going clean for a few weeks.

I will never touch cannabis again for the rest of my life, I only get high on Jesus 

 

Sleep is what I'm trying to improve on now, I can fall asleep but most nights I'm waking up 3-5 times which is discouraging as I used to just sleep before.  The other symptom that is still lingering is heart palpitations, but I'm confident that it will go away with more time as I'm only 7 months out. That said it has improved so so very much, mainly alt night I can feel my heart beating in random  places. 

[getofflex]

Thank you very much.  I was very dependent on the Lexapro being as I was on it 15 years before I started my taper.  I had a painful withdrawal that lasted for 6 years, and I'm still not fully recovered.  Had I known it would be like this, I would have never started on it.  

10 minutes ago, Hawesome said:

I only get high on Jesus 

Jesus is extremely important in my life and my recovery as well!  

 

10 minutes ago, Hawesome said:

Sleep is what I'm trying to improve on now, I can fall asleep but most nights I'm waking up 3-5 times which is discouraging as I used to just sleep before

I suggest practicing good sleep hygiene - cool dark room at night, no screen time a couple hours before bed, do only quiet relaxing activities in evening, avoid caffeine, etc.  

 

Here is our topic on sleep: 

 

Withdrawal Insomnia

 

And, here is what I do to help myself establish a good circadian rhythm, and help my sleep: 

 

My Insomnia Tips

 

Insomnia has been the worst part of WD for me.  Here is what I do to help.  

 

1) don't get overly anxious about it.  Realize that eventually, your sleep will improve.  Insomnia won't kill you, although it can make you pretty miserable.  Anxiety about sleep just makes the problem worse.  I know, easier said than done. I don't always do this, but I try.  Practice acceptance.

 

2)listen to very soft relaxing music at a very low volume.  

 

3)don't worry about what time it is.  Don't look at the clock.  

 

4) I try to stay active during the first half of the day.  I take a walk (mine is one hour) after breakfast every day.  Then, as the day goes on, gradually slow down.  Several hours before bed, I only do very relaxing things, like read, or just sit and relax.  This helps to set our circadian rhythm.  Try to get outside and get some light exposure during the day, too. 

 

5) Avoid toxic, negative people.  Avoid stress when possible, although I know a lot of stressors are unavoidable.   For me, this can really help me to relax better.  

 

6) I stay away from MSG, high salt, and aspartame. They are in a lot of our modern processed foods.  I try to eat more whole and natural, and not as many processed foods.  Also avoid processed meats with sodium nitrate, etc , such as hotdogs, ham, bacon, and sausage.  These can keep you up at night too.

 

7) avoid eating large amounts of sugar and processed carbohydrates.  This causes your blood glucose to spike up, which causes your pancreas to create insulin to control your blood sugar, which then causes your blood sugar to drop too low, and then your to create adrenaline to try to regulate your blood sugar.  Adrenaline keeps you awake because it is an activating hormone.

 

9) too much sodium (salt) can cause your blood pressure and heart rate to rise, and make it hard to sleep.

 

[Hawesome]

@getofflex you are a beacon of light my friend, God bless you! You give me so much encouragement overall and specifically on the sleep. I can't believe I haven't started high quality fish oil with Vitamin E, I will try to start that today after I talk to my wife. Magnesium worked so well, I should have trusted the fish oil suggestions for other folks. I'm super discipline with my sleep schedule now, but I can improve on the coffee. I need to not drink any after 2pm so it can get out of my system before bed. I used to go to sleep at 11pm post all of this, and I found that my natural rhythm and overall highest success is 9:30pm on the dot. I have a feeling fish oil + VitE, coffee optimization, and your suggestions with mindset will help me out tremendously. I'm feeling extreme optimism right now! 

One more thing on the sleep, i'm getting 8+ hours, it usually goes as follows. Solid 4 then wakeup, 2 more hours, then wake up, 1 hour then up and down until it's time to just get out of bed. Some nights are better some worse, but I never eat past 7pm and stopped eating at night about 6 months ago. I feel rested throughout the day but my mind makes me think i'm not sleeping right which brings on anxiety. 

Finally, I'm sorry for your pain and suffering these past 15 years. I will say, you are a bad a$$ MF. It takes a true savage to go through this. And I hope you find joy helping others. You have given me so much hope with your responses to me. My God bless you, I will pray for you tonight ❤️ 

[getofflex]

1 hour ago, Hawesome said:

You give me so much encouragement overall and specifically on the sleep

You are most welcome.  I'm just extremely grateful for this site and its knowledge, as I don't know how I would have ended up without it, so I'm just paying it forward.  

 

1 hour ago, Hawesome said:

I can't believe I haven't started high quality fish oil with Vitamin E, I will try to start that today after I talk to my wife.

Sounds good!  

 

1 hour ago, Hawesome said:

Magnesium worked so well, I should have trusted the fish oil suggestions for other folks.

You could try taking low doses of magnesium in the middle of the night when you wake up.  Some folks find this helps them to sleep.  

 

1 hour ago, Hawesome said:

I need to not drink any after 2pm so it can get out of my system before bed.

You might even try giving it up altogether. Some of us are extra sensitive, and it can affect our sleep no matter what time of day we drink it.  Even decaf has small amounts of caffeine.  

 

1 hour ago, Hawesome said:

One more thing on the sleep, i'm getting 8+ hours, it usually goes as follows. Solid 4 then wakeup, 2 more hours, then wake up, 1 hour then up and down until it's time to just get out of bed

It sounds like compared to others here, your sleep is actually pretty decent.  I know it may not feel like it to you though.  If you have early morning wake ups, you could try some slow release vitamin C.  Are you aware of the cortisol spike in the early morning?  In people with destabilized nervous systems, this tends to be exaggerated, and instead of waking up in the morning with energy, as the cortisol spike is meant to help us do, they wake up with panic and anxiety.  Here is a link about how to deal with the early AM cortisol spike. 

 

Managing the Early Morning Cortisol Spike

[getofflex]

1 hour ago, Hawesome said:

I will say, you are a bad a$$ MF. It takes a true savage to go through this. And I hope you find joy helping others. You have given me so much hope with your responses to me. My God bless you, I will pray for you tonight ❤️ 

I do appreciate your gratitude.  Yes, God often puts His children through some hard things.  I'm very glad I was able to be of help.  I'm praying for you, too.  

[Hawesome]

@getofflex Hello again, QQ - What is the best schedule for Magnesium? I take one 400mg magnesium pill around 7pm currently. Should i spread it out throughout the day? and what is the upper limit to how much you can take in a day? Just trying to optimize my schedule. Thank you! 

[getofflex]

You want to start at at a low dose, and gradually work your way up.  There is no specific dose.  We suggest taking small doses throughout the day.  I don't think there is an upper limit, it is just a mineral, and not dependency forming in any way.  Here is our topic on magnesium, which will give you more guidance. 

 

Magnesium

 

 

[Hawesome]

Thank you @getofflex ❤️ 

[Hawesome]

Heart palpitations and tinnitus

 

Hello All 👋

 

I'm nearing my 1 year anniversary from a horrible adverse reaction to 4 2.5mg pills of Lexapro, it's been a WILD ride to say the least. I have two questions below if anyone is interested in helping me. Last two symptoms left

1. What is the likely hood of heart paltipations totally resolving? They are much better however, I'm starting to believe I will have to live with them. Any chance this will totally resolve over time?

2. Tinnitus, should I expect to live with this forever? Do I have a chance this could resolve itself over time? 

Thank you everyone for your time and attention. I look forward to your feedback ❤️

Edited December 6, 2023 by LotusRising
added title from merged post

[Hawesome]

Hello All 👋

 

I'm nearing my 1 year anniversary from a horrible adverse reaction to four 2.5mg pills of Lexapro, it's been a WILD ride to say the least. I have two questions below if anyone is interested in helping me. Last two symptoms left

1. What is the likely hood of heart paltipations totally resolving? They are much better however, I'm starting to believe I will have to live with them. Any chance this will totally resolve over time?

2. Tinnitus, should I expect to live with this forever? Do I have a chance this could resolve itself over time? 

Thank you everyone for your time and attention. I look forward to your feedback ❤️

[LotusRising]

@Hawesome

 

Congratulations on nearing the 1 year mark! In my experience, both of these symptoms will fade with time and should follow the same windows and waves pattern as other symptoms. My tinnitus comes and goes in various forms (hissing, ringing, electrical wire humming) and heart palpitations are less frequent. Have you noticed an ebb and flow?

 

FYI: We have existing topics related to your above noted questions. Please have a quick look for existing topics before creating new ones, as this keeps our site tidy and makes info easier to find. You can do a site search in your browser eg. tachycardia:survivingantidepressants for existing topics.

 

See:

 

 

 

[Hawesome]

Gosh, thank you so much for the fast response @LotusRising! All very helpful, and I will dive into that reserach. I have searched the site high and low, and always have coments on the symptoms but never timelines on healing. 

I do notice waves with the specific symptoms, HOW CRAZY.

 

I hope your healing is moving fast, God Bless You!

[LotusRising]

Just now, Hawesome said:

always have coments on the symptoms but never timelines on healing. 

Unfortunately, I think this is because healing times are so individual.

 

You could try scouring the success stores, you might find some timelines there, but of course yours may also not line up with theirs ...

 

I know healing is painfully slow, but I hope you're staying optimistic  

[KenA]

@Hawesome Everyone has a unique healing timeline that we each have to go through But no matter how long it takes, just know that you are going to heal! Keep taking it one day at a time because each day you make it through is one closer to being healed!

[KenA]

23 hours ago, Hawesome said:

Heart palpitations and tinnitus

 

Hello All 👋

 

I'm nearing my 1 year anniversary from a horrible adverse reaction to 4 2.5mg pills of Lexapro, it's been a WILD ride to say the least. I have two questions below if anyone is interested in helping me. Last two symptoms left

1. What is the likely hood of heart paltipations totally resolving? They are much better however, I'm starting to believe I will have to live with them. Any chance this will totally resolve over time?

2. Tinnitus, should I expect to live with this forever? Do I have a chance this could resolve itself over time? 

Thank you everyone for your time and attention. I look forward to your feedback ❤️

I had both of these symptoms. The palpitations have gone away completely and the tinnitus is 95 percent gone I would say. The only time I notice it is if I am sitting in a quiet room and have nothing else to focus on. There are times it goes away completely. So, it's just a waiting game, but something I learned how to live with a long time ago. Once I completely accepted it, it lost its power over me. Doesn't bother me at all anymore. 

[Hawesome]

@KenA This is music to my ears! Thank you, I have massive hope today. I'm finally getting my life back and these last two last symptoms are sticking around a bit longer, and that's ok.  I take my magnizium right before bed, and that calms down the palpitations massively. I'm sure by this time next year I will be totally healed, I can live with that

[KenA]

@Hawesome Most welcome! You will get there I promise! Slow and steady wins the race!

[Celeste1990]

Hello @Hawesome! I love your positivity and optimism, and I could really use some of that right now. Your story is very similar to mine, I had one 10mg dose of Lexapro one month ago and had a horrible reaction. My symptoms are extreme dizziness all day, insomnia, jerking awake when trying to fall asleep, and muscle twitching and jerking. I’ve also had suicidal thoughts like my family would be better off if I wasn’t here pulling them down. I never thought I would imagine my two year old son growing up without his mom. 💔 It’s truly a horrible experience. I was just curious how you were doing now?