Becca going off Zoloft

[Becca]

I've been on zoloft for 20 years, tapered from 100mg to 50 mg.

[Altostrata]

Welcome, Becca. I made your post into your Intro and Updates topic.

 

Tell us more!

[strawberry17]

Curious to know more as well.

[peggy]

welcome Becca!

Wow, 20 years!

How are you feeling now?

[Becca]

After the 100 to 50 mg. reduction was so freaky I gave up.Status quo. Next 6 years I took as little as possible to avoid w/d (50 mg. every 3 -4 days) Then a strange thing happened.I had to get a refill and it turned out to be a different generic (Camber). Now you may be aware of all the Wellbutrin XL stuff so you know that generics aren't all alike. Well the different generic put me into total SSRI w/d--of course not intended and a total shocker. It was hard to realize what was happening but I have intimate knowledge of the w/d so I figured it out.After 12 days on the Camber, I ordered my old brand and started taking it-- 50 mg every day.But lo and behold, I did not just get back to my pre-generic switch status. It was like starting from zero--with the typical 2 weeks for the sertraline to reach full effect. So, again this suggested that active ingredient or suspension was way different in the Camber. But you know, things happen for a reason. The upside of the unintentional w/d is that during that period I got a glimpse of what the drug has been masking--I got a glimpse of my real self. During this period, at a tai chi class my real feelings washed over me. And so I am now going to taper. When I was tapering before, I couldn't figure out how to do accurate, minuscule reductions of a pill. But thanks to your site, I ordered the Ora-Plus today and I'm ready. God willing. Thank you all!

[Altostrata]

Wow, good to hear we can help.

 

How long have you been taking 50mg every day?

 

Did you see the Tips for Tapering Zoloft topic?

[Becca]

As you know, it's so important to be very prepared and very intentional about doing the w/d. So when I was in the middle of the surprise w/d caused by taking the different generic, I was pretty freaked out. I thought I would need in-patient. So I called around to every detox/rehab clinic in King County (Seattle has lots!)and none recognized the SSRI w/d. Except I spoke to the head nurse at Schick Shadel (she has 30 yrs in the biz) and she (as an individual) gets it-- she understands SSRI w/d. She said Zoloft is like a benzo withdrawal.I've never taken benzos but that is what the Zoloft w/d is like for me--like the harrowing rebound anxiety that a long-time benzo user experiences. So I would be interested in whether anyone has found that taking a benzo during w/d of SSRI is helpful.That's why I mentioned valerian in the other post--I've had good results with valerian for anxiety.But it was a very strong concentrate. From what I've read, Zoloft is more sedating than other SSRIs. It also affects dopamine more. I gather from this site that you're not in favor of the Prozac w/d protocol which some say lessens w/d because of its longer half life.

[Altostrata]

Try not to take a benzo for SSRI withdrawal, benzos have their own problems, one of which is rebound anxiety.

 

Slow tapering, if it works for you, is less risky than the Prozac switch, which sometimes does not work.

[alexjuice]

I have experience with benzos and antidepressant withdrawal. If I could redo it, I would not have used the benzo.

 

In my case I had taken benzos for years and then stopped using a 12 day detox protocol in an inpatient facility. Firstly, this (12 day detox) didn't have a good result, not at all. However, it wasn't until about 2 years after discontinuing benzos that I decided to taper the other medications I was on (Effexor & Risperdal).

 

I tapered too quickly and developed severe insomnia, anxiety, hypersensitivity, etc. I felt so terrible that my doctor recommended reintroducing a benzo. I found myself back on klonopin and soon dependent on benzos. My attempts to taper/manage the benzos created or influenced terrible health consequences that were, in retrospect, worse than the original insomnia and anxiety.

 

If I had it to do again, I would absolutely have tapered the Effexor much more cautiously. And I would not reintroduced the benzodiazepines. At this point, it is water under the damn... (there's an expression in the neighborhood of what I just wrote) ... really I just wish I had taken the thing slower and kept the additional inputs to the minimum.

 

I agree it is important to think through a tapering strategy and plan for contigencies. I didn't do this -- I didn't know what the heck I was doing. And so I ended up making mistakes and those mistakes live on as regrets.

 

Alex

[Becca]

I read the thread on using Prozac to w/d from other SSRIs--it makes sense and all the posts are positive--it worked for them-- which makes it really tempting to try, but I'm pretty sure it won't work for me. I tried prozac several years ago, after Zoloft pooped out, and it was way too activating for me. Zoloft is much more sedating that Prozac. My doc said that prozac is too stimulating for many. I'm pretty sure the gross anxiety I experience in Zoloft w/d would b amplified by prozac in my case. The slow taper approach looks like my best bet. I'm an impatient person, but if I'd started the slow taper years ago I'd be better off.Got to start somewhere. Regrets are a waste of time.

[Nadia]

Hi Becca,

 

That is interesting what you say about the generic. The last few years I took Zoloft I sometimes bought a cheaper generic, and noticed it didn't really work well. It's what I was taking when I went cold turkey, and just now I remember thinking that since it wasn't working so well, it was almost like I had tapered (as if the difference with the generic were just potency!). I knew so little about how to taper back then!

 

I sometimes have also wondered if some of what I have gone through with withdrawal was due to the generic.

 

It's also interesting what you say about Zoloft being sedating and the dopamine. The "magic combo" for me was always Zoloft and Wellbutrin. I had a psychiatrist say she was betting on the Wellbutrin doing more for me than the Zoloft. It gets me thinking... I think I liked Zoloft because the extra serotonin would make me feel good. It never lasted for very long, but I guess it was a way of masking my pain and depression, even if it wasn't getting at the root cause. At the time I totally bought into the chemical imbalance thing and was feeling like what I thought normal people felt for the first time in my life! I felt confident and able to handle things and interested and active. In control... no longer destroyed by small things and needy.

 

About two years into taking Zoloft, my horrible psychiatrist at the time upped my dose to 200mg (because I was hospitalized... long story). Really, I was going through a rough time because of certain life events, and instead of recognizing that, she thought I was depressed again and needed more drugs and that my 100 mg wasn't working for me anymore. I got severe headaches and felt awful on the higher dose of Zoloft, so she took me off it and had me try Prozac. It didn't make me feel activated like you say, but it didn't do much for me. Eventually I went back on Zoloft and felt fine again. Then she added Wellbutrin because of sexual side effects. That was the beginning of the merry go round.

 

Looking back I can't believe I asked to be medicated, and then let it get so out of hand!

 

In any case, I'm rambling. I really just wanted to encourage you to go on a very, very gradual and slow taper. I did a several month taper in 2008 and thought I'd be fine but it was not enough. I had such severe anxiety and horribleness that I reinstated. Then stupidly I stopped cold turkey in 2010, also thinking that since I felt OK at first I would be fine. 20 years is a long, long time. Don't get impatient!! And I think it makes sense to taper the Zoloft instead of switching!

[strawberry17]

Hi Becca

It sounds like you have great insight into your situation. I was on Zoloft 50mg for years (except it's called sertraline in the UK), I found it extremely hard to get off the liquid wasn't available here, and I didn't have the wonderful information on this site about how to make a suspension or I would have done that. Because of that, I DID do the Prozac switch, it worked out for me, it was a leap of faith that worked. But I have seen many people for whom it's been a disaster they regretted. Personally I wouldn't advise anyone to do it if they have access to liquid zoloft, really it is better the devil you know than the devil you don't. I think you will do fine with your taper.

[Becca]

strawberry: thanks for encouraging words. By the way, I love England!

[Barbarannamated]

Hi Becca.

 

I read the other thread that you are looking for resources in Seattle. Do you think the nurse you mentioned above might have any suggestions? She, at least, acknowledges the problem.

 

It sounds like you have a plan of action. Just throwing that in in case you're still searching.

[areyouthere]

 

I sometimes have also wondered if some of what I have gone through with withdrawal was due to the generic.

 

 

Huh. I never thought of this. I too had a terrible reaction the the generic lexapro I took for 14 days last April or so. I reinstated the brand name but perhaps this is a more logical explanation as to why my summer was so much different than pervious ones. Thinking.

 

Welcome Becca. The beauty this forum that attracts new people like you .... your experience has sparked a few "Ahas!" for those of us stumbling through our own journey. Thanks for that. I hope this site will assist you in your journey.

[Barbarannamated]

I, too, have had issues with different generics of Klonopin and trazodone. The one branded generic of Wellbutrin (Budeprion for bupropion) was recently pulled from market. My husband tried it briefly and immediately noticed a difference. The time release coating was releasing drug too quickly and levels very inconsistent.

[Becca]

speaking of aha! moments: I was reading another thread here. Before reading, it never occurred to me that the tinnitus I developed could be caused by SSRI.

[abster728]

I too have been on Zoloft now for 15 years and I am only 26. I am down to 100 mg now. I was on 150mg but I am now down to 100 about to go to 75mg.. I also have been off of my valium now for almost 1 year, I was also on it for 15 years. I am doing ok with out it. Just REALLLLLLY HORRIBLE insomnia. My goal is to be drug free...... If you need to talk to anyone Becca feel free to message me.. that goes for anyone on here as well. Well I am off to bed well at least gonna try... Night!

Abby

[Becca]

Abby: Thanks for your reply. I get an array of w/d symptoms but by far, the rebound anxiety has been the deal breaker in the past for getting off SSRIs. When I first had it prescribed I was depressed--not anxious. But I remember when it first kicked in (around day 12-14), a feeling of total calm washed over me like I was stoned. Then, over time, that just sort of steady-stated into general zombieness. As the rehab nurse I mentioned earlier said, Z. is more like a benzo than other SSRIs-- so the w/d is similar to a benzo w/d.That fits with my experience of w/d anxiety/insomnia that is beyond belief, and frankly, intolerable. The only suggestion is to taper very slow. (this is unsolicited advice so take this with a grain of salt: reducing 100mg to 75mg is probably too big a step.May want to taper slower. The problem is if you get into trouble with a taper that is too fast, you may give up, like I did. Lots of people on this forum say they did a taper too fast. I wish I'd tapered 100mg to 50 mg. slower years ago. My plan is to taper from 50mg one mg at a time!!

[Nadia]

Ahh... Becca, I'm glad to hear of another person that didn't have anxiety before Zoloft. It seems a lot of people have rebound anxiety that is worse than their original anxiety, but in my case the anxiety is completely new. Well... it's hard to make such an absolute judgment like that. I did get nervous before, and I even talked about feeling some anxiety, but boy, I didn't know what I was talking about (pre-drugs). What I called "anxiety" was me getting really worked up to try to avoid my depression. I would feel myself getting depressed, or having strong emotional reactions, and I had a deep fear of abandonment, and that's what I called anxiety.

 

It had nothing to do with what I feel now with awful insomnia and feeling like someone secretly injected me with massive amounts of cocaine (which I suppose is adrenaline). And how now, if I get nervous about any little thing, it stays turned on and amplifies to nightmarish proportions and takes days, weeks, sometimes months to improve.

 

All the doctors I've seen just assume that it's "regular" anxiety, unrelated to coming off of Zoloft. They get a blank, skeptical look when I tell them I think it's related to quitting Zoloft and/or Wellbutrin. So it helps to get some kind of validation from a story like yours.

 

Anyway, it seems my "recovery" is challenged by life stressors and my menstrual cycle, but I did have a couple of weeks of feeling completely normal in July, so I'm holding onto that as hope for the future.

 

I wish you a speedy recovery!

[Becca]

Nadia: Yes, the rebound anxiety of Zoloft w/d is like being injected with adrenaline. I relate exactly to how you describe your pre-SSRI anxiety--normal feeling compared to drug-induced massive adrenaline surge caused by w/d. The skepticism of doctors is a big problem for me because one of my core issues is not being believed (related to my childhood experiences). So the official denial of the w/d severity has been really mind boggling for me. We all need to have our existence affirmed. It's so important for us to have a forum like this where we are believed.

 

“It is certain my conviction gains infinitely, the moment another soul will believe in it” (Lord Jim)

[Nadia]

Yes!! I too have trouble with being believed/validated because of childhood issues (that then persisted into adulthood and got compounded). Dialectical Behavioral Training helped me with that a bit, but I'm still learning to validate my own feelings, I still struggle with needing "permission" to feel things. So having doctors deny my experience has been really tough. I am so thankful to this online community for this...

 

It's interesting, because at the same time as I have so much trouble with not being validated on an emotional level, I have also traditionally been very skeptical of "experts"... more so now than ever. I am not a follower, I fact-check everything to the best of my abilities. I get in arguments with lawyers, with accountants, with doctors... I get criticized a lot because those are not my fields. This has served me well, even when I of course make mistakes. But I think questioning everything has done me more good than harm.

 

My mom often says you have to pick a doctor and then trust what he/she says and follow it because he's the expert. No way!, I say... never follow anyone blindly. Look at the mess I'm in now for trusting what doctors said about antidepressants. The doctors said the drugs were safe, and I suspended judgment because for years I had been hoping for something that would make me feel better. My sister had started taking Paxil and it worked for her... I didn't even know that SSRIs existed until then. These new drugs didn't have horrible side effects, they said. So I went to a psychiatrist and ASKED for them! And only three days after initiating Zoloft, I started feeling better than I had my whole life. I felt like the crutches were kicked out from under me... I imagined I was now normal, my hypersensitivity was gone. I was blinded by my desire to be "normal" and didn't apply my critical thinking! I defended the use of ADs to the death! If only the internet existed back then like it does now, perhaps I would have done some research. As it was, I didn't start researching into negative effects until around 2002.

 

Of course, I am completely lost as to a real explanation of what is happening to me now. I know it has to do with a complex mix of the results of having taking ADs for so many years and then quitting, plus probably hormonal changes due to my age, plus my particular original psychological issues and my current life situation. Sometimes, in the depths of despair, I wonder if there is something else going on... if perhaps having had chronic mono is somehow involved as well, if perhaps I've developed other issues that I should keep trying to find. But it is so disheartening that so few people, from experts to close friends and family, take my evaluation of what I'm going through seriously. I'd say 95% of people I talk to about this think it's all in my head. The only thing that gets any acceptance is possible hormonal changes. Everyone believes in those.

 

Anyway, sorry for taking over your thread with this rant!

[Barbarannamated]

When I first had it prescribed I was depressed--not anxious. But I remember when it first kicked in (around day 12-14), a feeling of total calm washed over me like I was stoned. Then, over time, that just sort of steady-stated into general zombieness. As the rehab nurse I mentioned earlier said, Z. is more like a benzo than other SSRIs-- so the w/d is similar to a benzo w/d.That fits with my experience of w/d anxiety/insomnia that is beyond belief, and frankly, intolerable.

 

Add me to the list of those who did not have anxiety prior to taking SS/NRIs. The anxiety/morning panic/insomnia of acute withdrawal was completely foreign to me.

 

I'm curious about the comparison of Zoloft to benzos and also the effect on dopamine. Zoloft caused severe bruxism/TMJ which is, theoretically, a dopamine-related movement disorder.

 

Thanks for sharing your experience.

 

Nadia, your post sparked recollection of challenging college professors regularly - and winning I wish I had done same with doctors.

 

B

[strawberry17]

I can relate to a lot of this thread, I was on Zoloft (although it's called Sertraline in the UK) for several years, now I would say I did have some anxiety pre Zoloft, but, NOTHING like the rebound anxiety coming off it too fast, I had 24/7 adrenaline surges and chronic insomnia, which only ever eased with reinstating the drug. Never heard before about it being close in formulation to benzos before, that's interesting.

[Altostrata]

I think the nurse was speaking figuratively about Zoloft being like a benzo. It's not really.

 

I also did not have a lot of anxiety prior to SSRIs.

[Becca]

it's not like a benzo in formulation

[abster728]

Although Zoloft is not good for me now as I have had the poop out effect I suppose well after 15 years I would like to think that's what it is... It did serve its purpose for me... I had SEVERE anxiety before I started Zoloft 15 years ago.. From what I can remember of it. It was absolutely dehibilatating!!! Zoloft brought me out of a VERY dark spot in my life... But it has also put me in an even bigger spot than I ever imagined.. It's like a double edged sword but I promise I am gonna come out on top in the end even if it takes 5 years .... I WILL BE DRUG FREE!!!

[Becca]

From comments on this thread, I thought some might be interested in these links on information on generics in general and generic Wellbutrin in particular:

 

http://www.peoplespharmacy.com/2012/10/03/generic-wellbutrin-budeprion-xl-300-withdrawn-vindication/

http://www.beneschclassactionupdate.com/?entry=22