Osbrin: My story so far

[Osbrin]

Years ago i got diagnosed with hyperactive bladder and we could never find ther cause so my doctor prescribed me a TCA (clomipramine) to help me calm down since i was suicidal at the time because of my degrading quality of life caused by the condition. a few months later i got better and decided to stop the drug, i did and had around 2 weeks of withdrawn symptons but got good as new, 2 years later my bladder got bad again and i returned to the drug this time i stayed with it for about 2 years and when i tried to stop again the withdrawn sympstons were way more severe than before even though i was tampering and it didnt clear with 2 weeks, i was 2 months in and still feeling it and it was ruining my daily life so i chickened out and decided to go back to it and i stayed with it for abou 6 years.

 

At the end of last year/beggning of this year i decided to stop it again but this time tampering as slow as possible. The tampering was a slow reduction of the dosage every 2 weeks, even with the tampering i felt the withdrawn sympstons become stonger every time i reduced the dosage, when i was finally out of the drug completely the withdrawn sympston became absurdly strong i couldnt handle more than 3 weeks so i went back to the drug, but this time there was a wierd side effect, even back at the drug after 2 weeks of usage i got the withdrawn symptons and the only thing that could make it better was to increase the dosage, i did that and 2 weeks later the same time happend so i had up the dosage again and this happened 4 times until i was feeling the withdrawn even witht he maximum dosage, i got really angry because my doctor had no idea what was going and went to seek help from other doctors and they also didnt know what was going on.

 

One of them even suggested add some lithium to max the potency of the drug but that didnt explain why i was getting resistant to it every 2 weeks and neither this could guarantee that i wouldn't get resistant to the drug + lithium 2 weeks later, and the doctor couldn't give me this guarantee so i decided to just stop since i had no choice i already was feeling the withdrawn symptons full force even with 75mg of Clomipramine daily.

 

I am now 2 months and 2 weeks out and my symptons are getting worse every day. Not 5 days ago i started feeling symptons of periferal neurophatic disorder, my hands and feet hurt like hell and when i touch things it feels like i am touching knifes, the other symptons were bad enough but this new ones are making my life impossible in every single way, i cant work right and i cant do anything else right either. Of course i went to seke out other fields to try and find a cause for my different withdrawn symptons (severe headache, severe stomach pain, feeling tired all day, abnormal irritated state, muscle and join pain and stiffnes and lastly pain and hypersensitivy on hands and feet) all my exames for these conditions were ok as you expect, nothing wrong with my nerves, stomach or joints and it ruled out that whatever is happening is happening in my Central Nervous System with the withdrawn much likely being the culprit.

 

All my symptons have the same thing in common: they all seem to have been the consequence of my SNC going haywire because of the withdrawn. I am desperate, i cant go on with this the way it is and i also cant just go back to the drug since i got that wierd effect of becoming completely resistant to it every 2 weeks for no reason. I really dont know what to do now, i have SI every day, my life has literally ended and i cant seems to find a light at the end of this tunnel.

 

Any help of people with a simular experience would mean a lot to me.

 

Thank you, sorry about my bad english.

Edited July 26 by Emonda
Name to title - added some spacing

[Emonda]

Welcome @Osbrin

12 hours ago, Osbrin said:

sorry about my bad english.

 

All good 👍

 

With your next post, please add some spacing/paragraphs so it is a little easier for my middle-aged eyes to read (I might go in and edit your original post).

 

So the moderators can best help you, please complete your drug signature by following these instructions. Adding a signature ensures your drug history appears at the bottom of every post, making it more efficient for those trying to assist. This link should go directly to your own signature: Account Settings – Create or Edit a signature

 

We need to know Date/Drug/Dose.

 

12 hours ago, Osbrin said:

I am now 2 months and 2 weeks out and my symptons are getting worse every day.

 

Without seeing your signature, It sounds like you tapered too quickly. Those that taper too quickly often develop very unpleasant withdrawal symptoms. This Daily Checklist of Antidepressant Withdrawal Symptoms (PDF) is a helpful summary of what many experience. Going on, off, on, and off drugs is also very unhelpful.

 

When tapering, slow is the way to go: Why taper by 10% of my dosage? The reductions should get smaller and smaller each month, for example: 10mg, 9mg, 8.1mg, 7.3mg etc. This process involves a degree of trial and error, as there is no way of predicting how an individual will respond. Importantly, if you develop unpleasant side effects from tapering, halt the taper, give yourself time to settle, and once stable, taper more slowly and by smaller amounts moving forward. The experience of others suggests that the lower you go in dose, the slower you need to go with tapering.

 

Recovery from stopping ADs too quickly is not linear. There are good days and not-so-good days/weeks/months. This is referred to as the Windows and waves pattern of stabilization.

Non-drug coping strategies

We don't suggest many supplements, but two that many of us find helpful are magnesium and omega-3 fish oil. Here are the links for info about those. Add one at a time and start with a low dose to see how it affects you. 

Magnesium and Omega-3 fatty acids (fish oil)

Avoid alcohol and other mind-altering drugs.

Once again, welcome to S.A.

Emonda