Jaxy59: Need help with current reinstate taper

[Jaxy59]

Thank you. Also, I’ve noticed that aside from random muscle twitching in my arms, severe burning chest anxiety every morning, day and sometimes night which leads to negative thoughts and fatigue, I don’t see any other symptoms other than occasionally lightheadedness. It’s the same every day. Does that mean this horrible anxiety is the new normal? Bc if it is, I can’t survive every day with this. It’s been constant everyday for 10 months. I’m so afraid it won’t go away. 

[Catwoman73]

10 minutes ago, Jaxy59 said:

Thank you. Also, I’ve noticed that aside from random muscle twitching in my arms, severe burning chest anxiety every morning, day and sometimes night which leads to negative thoughts and fatigue, I don’t see any other symptoms other than occasionally lightheadedness. It’s the same every day. Does that mean this horrible anxiety is the new normal? Bc if it is, I can’t survive every day with this. It’s been constant everyday for 10 months. I’m so afraid it won’t go away. 

 

No, the anxiety is absolutely not your new normal.  I have found that psychological symptoms are the very last to disappear in my previous cold turkeys/ rapid tapers.  It can take a very long time.  The idea with restatement will be to reduce that symptom (and others of course) to a level where you can tolerate it while holding for a few months to stabilize.  But even if you didn't reinstate, you would heal from this.  Like I said- it can take a long time though.  Work on those non-drug coping mechanisms- they will help you if you practice them consistently.   

[Jaxy59]

Ok. I just struggle with how to deal and manage the anxiety and panic if it’s not “real” type anxiety. It doesnt respond to the techniques I’m applying or the book I’m reading bc it’s not my anxiety. Just hard to work through it. My chest is just a constant burning of anxiety and panic. It’s so overwhelming. 

[Jaxy59]

I’m still wondering if it’s part of an adverse reaction to this viibryd. It’s really bad burning in my chest anxiety. 

[Catina7]

Hi @Jaxy59 and welcome to SA!  I sent you a PM and you'll see why when you get it.  

[Jane318]

On 9/2/2024 at 7:31 AM, Jaxy59 said:

I was on Zoloft successfully for 24 years until I finally decided I want to live life without chemicals... I feel like I’m a loss cause and I’ll never get better. 

Just wanted to say that you are not alone, and you are in the right place.  I was where you are a couple months ago when I fortunately discovered this site.  Got good advice, followed it, and am slowly but surely stabilizing.  Not linear, but noticeable from week to week.    Trust the moderator - if you take their advice, I promise that you *will* stabilize and start to feel better.  It does takes time - If you read the Bible, you will find many encouraging verses about waiting on the Lord and hope.  Cling to those.  I've been on ADs even longer than you have and I know that eventually I will be free.  Hang in there - praying for you.

[Jaxy59]

Hi there. Thank you for reaching out. This is the hardest thing to go through. I’m really struggling bad. I have this chest burning anxiety/panic in my chest that is there everyday, all day and it’s scaring me. It’s been 10 months and it’s not even showing a glimpse of going away. How does 1 manage this? It’s unbearable. Aside from muscle twitches and the thoughts that come from the chest anxiety, I really don’t have any other symptoms. I’m so scared. 

[Jaxy59]

I just don’t know if this level of chest anxiety is even normal to have even with withdrawal. And it gives me terrible SI thoughts that are the absolute farthest from what I want in life. This is not how life should be right now. Im so scared. 

[Jaxy59]

Do you think maybe it’s too high of a dose that’s why I’m having this severe burning chest anxiety? I dropped to 6.1 exactly 1 week ago yesterday and I’m feeling the same, sometimes worse. I really don’t know what to do. 

[Catwoman73]

If you made a drop a week ago and you're feeling worse, then dropping further is absolutely not the way to go.  You've answered your own question- if this were an adverse reaction, you would feel better with a drop.  I think stability is what you really need right now.   Over the last year, you've been on six different medications, with multiple dose changes of each of them.  That screams nervous system instability to me, and for that a LONG hold is the only answer. 

[Jaxy59]

Ok. You’re right. I just don’t know how to bear this discomfort. It’s so painful. I distract and it takes me right back to it bc it burns so bad. Like anxious burning in chest. I always feel like I’m fighting panic attack or I’m going to lose it. I know I can’t go to the hospital bc they would make it worse but sometimes I don’t know how to handle this. Please God, heal me!!! 

[Catwoman73]

5 minutes ago, Jaxy59 said:

Ok. You’re right. I just don’t know how to bear this discomfort. It’s so painful. I distract and it takes me right back to it bc it burns so bad. Like anxious burning in chest. I always feel like I’m fighting panic attack or I’m going to lose it. I know I can’t go to the hospital bc they would make it worse but sometimes I don’t know how to handle this. Please God, heal me!!! 

 

Practice, practice and practice some more with the mindfulness, meditation, distractions... whatever you need to do.  It may feel impossible, but if you keep working at it, I promise, it will eventually click.  It took me a long time to master this stuff, but it has been so worth the effort!  Even when I have anxiety or panic now, I'm able to get it under control almost immediately.  And I'm nothing special- if I can discipline myself to master these techniques, anyone can!  I believe in you- just keep working at it! 

[Jaxy59]

I am working on meditating. It’s just so hard sometimes to focus bc of how uncomfortable I am. Do you think this burning in my chest is just my nervous system screaming? Maybe it’s worse bc my body is now feeling the slight dose change to 6.1? Thank you for helping me. I’ve had no breaks the past 2 days from this anxiety so I’m panicky. 

[Catina7]

Have you read through this topic thread yet?  It has some good tips.

 

 

[Catina7]

How are you doing today @Jaxy59?  Thinking of you.  ❤️

[Jaxy59]

Hey there. Thank you so much for reaching out. I’m so grateful for everyone that I’ve come to contact with during this journey. I’m better today. Had an extremely rough 2 days but anxiety is better and manageable today. I have made a daily self care checklist for myself that I will be doing every single day consisting of, food journaling, multiple guided meditations , morning scripture readings, I AM affirmations throughout the day and just started reading Claire Weekes book “Hope and Help for your Nerves”. I’ve also been reading about anxiety and learning where it comes from and why it happens so I know exactly what I’m up against to defeat it. Today is a pretty good day so I’m praying that it’s a sign that my brain and body can now stabilize and we can overcome this. It’s just really hard on those hard days. But God is carrying me through. I never considered myself a very emotionally, mentally strong person and always worried about what others think but o believe after this, Gods purpose is to show me that I am incredibly strong, resilient and all I need to be is confident within myself. It’s time to rewire this brain of mine and get to business. It’s already been a long journey and I’m determined to help God heal me sooner rather than later. God is Great! I need to get back to my family. I pray for all of you and thank you again for being such an incredible person. How are you? 

[Jaxy59]

And it’s frustrating to try and figure out what foods are triggering my intense burning anxiety. 

[Catina7]

1 hour ago, Jaxy59 said:

I’m better today

 

Glad to hear it!  One thing this journey teaches us is that we have good days and bad days.  Just because we're having a bad day doesn't mean every day is going to be bad.

 

1 hour ago, Jaxy59 said:

I have made a daily self care checklist for myself that I will be doing every single day consisting of, food journaling, multiple guided meditations , morning scripture readings, I AM affirmations throughout the day and just started reading Claire Weekes book “Hope and Help for your Nerves”. I’ve also been reading about anxiety and learning where it comes from and why it happens so I know exactly what I’m up against to defeat it.

 

Sounds like a great plan of action!  I am dealing with daily anxiety myself, and it can be very challenging at times.  I feel you!

 

1 hour ago, Jaxy59 said:

But God is carrying me through. I never considered myself a very emotionally, mentally strong person and always worried about what others think but o believe after this, Gods purpose is to show me that I am incredibly strong, resilient and all I need to be is confident within myself.

 

These are very nice thoughts.  My faith definitely has been a stronghold as well.  

 

1 hour ago, Jaxy59 said:

I pray for all of you and thank you again for being such an incredible person. How are you? 

 

You are very kind!  I'm doing okay, thanks for asking!  I look forward to reading more of your posts as to how you're doing.

 

Well neighbor (lol) ... signing off for now!  

 

Catina 😘

[Jaxy59]

You have daily anxiety? How long have you had? Is it everyday? I’ve been working and researching on how to overcome anxiety because I will. Here’s a few sites and book that I’m currently reading. 

https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZTF8kSsuL/
 

book: Claire Weekes “Hope and Help for your nerves” got on Amazon. 
 

I’ve been learning exactly what anxiety is and how it works so I know exactly what I’m up against. 
God does not want us to be anxious and to give to him so I will learn and follow his orders. We will beat this. So many people out there that have learned how to overcome everyday anxiety. 

[Catina7]

13 hours ago, Jaxy59 said:

You have daily anxiety? How long have you had? Is it everyday?

 

Yes, I have it every day.  I've had anxiety issues even before I went on antidepressants, but the anxiety I get now with tapering and withdrawal is much, much worse.  It gets worse with stress and too much social interaction, so I'm limited with how much I can take on.  Once I'm off all these horrible drugs and my brain gets back to normal, I'm sure the anxiety will get better.

 

What really helps me is keeping my life very low stress, exercise, EFT Tapping, nice warm baths, and not fighting it but just accepting it.  I did get acupuncture for a while back when I tapered too fast, and that seemed to help too.  I've read the Claire Weekes book and it's very helpful.  Thanks for sharing that video, I'll have to check it out.

 

13 hours ago, Jaxy59 said:

God does not want us to be anxious and to give to him so I will learn and follow his orders

 

It's true that God doesn't want us to excessively worry about things, but the anxiety that arises due to tapering and withdrawal is not a result of us not being obedient to his Word...it's due to chemical changes inside our brains that can be difficult to control sometimes.  But he understands this and can give us the strength to endure.  

[LukeUK]

I am glad you have had times where you feel a bit better. That is a good sign. You may have more times when it is difficult again, but I agree that the best advice is to just hold and stabilise. You have had many, many drug changes in recent times. Your body needs stability, to stabilise itself.

 

Once this has been achieved, you can approach your tapering journey with intent from a position of strength, deliberately, and not out of desperation, and with hopefully minimal suffering.

 

  

18 hours ago, Jaxy59 said:

And it’s frustrating to try and figure out what foods are triggering my intense burning anxiety. 

 

It may be that they don't.

 

By all means see if you can identify patterns. Perhaps you could get a diary, write down everything you eat and a 1 to 10 rating of anxiety severity at the end of each day. That might help identify a pattern.

 

However, it may well be that food sensitivities are simply not something you are experiencing. I have had extremely severe symptoms and have noticed absolutely no patterns in relation to food. I have even attempted to have lots of high histamine foods, or other foods I may have reacted to, to see if it makes symptoms more severe and it has not.

 

I had low tolerance for caffeine and no longer do. I reacted negatively to a pepsi max (which I have never had again), but this was both in the early months and I've never reacted to any foods since.

 

I'm not saying don't try to identify patterns, I'm just saying write it down and then forget about it- don't overthink it and cause more anxiety. You just don't need that right now and chances are if there's no obvious, immediate adverse reactions to food that you've noticed, after 10 months, you won't notice anything that is happening in the background without tracking it with a diary.

[Catwoman73]

On 9/11/2024 at 3:21 PM, Jaxy59 said:

And it’s frustrating to try and figure out what foods are triggering my intense burning anxiety. 

 

Keeping that symptom diary, along with your tracking your food intake, is the best way to do this.  That is what helped me identify my small handful of triggers.  But some anxiety just happens when in withdrawal, with no triggers at all.  At takes time and patience to tease it all out.  Living in society these days makes us all think that things are going to happen quickly, but that just isn't the case in withdrawal.  We taper slowly, we recover slowly, and if we want to endure this with any degree of calm and grace, we slow our lives down, and learn to listen to what our bodies are telling us.  Living in withdrawal is a massive lifestyle adjustment for virtually every person on this site- give yourself the time and grace to figure it all out. 

 

Sending hugs... I know it's tough.  ❤️‍🩹

[Jaxy59]

Yes I agree. I admit that I am guilty of wanting a quick fix to everything but I’ve learned from my therapist and through this journey that it takes TIME: Things I Must Earn. That really made me realize that I will grow incredibly strong from this. I’m realizing that A lot of my anxiety, burning symptoms are stemming from food triggers. I’m getting bloodwork done Monday and meeting with a nutritionist on Wednesday that will test my food intolerances, histamine and other things and will help create a diet plan that will help me. I definitely am learning that I really need to fix my gut and I believe it will in turn help with the withdrawal and make things a lot smoother. I’m really working on getting closer to God and meditation multiple times a day. Thank you again for being you. Youve been incredibly helpful.  Hope you have a great weekend! 

[Catwoman73]

This all sounds absolutely wonderful, @Jaxy59!  Good for you for taking control of what you can.  That's all any of us can do- control the things we can, and just let the rest of it go.  You will grow tremendously as you proceed through this journey, and it's actually exciting to know that you will be a whole new you on the other side!  Talk about putting a positive spin on a crappy situation lol!

 

You have a lovely weekend as well! ❤️

[Catina7]

4 minutes ago, Jaxy59 said:

I admit that I am guilty of wanting a quick fix to everything

 

Ha!  Aren't we all? lol

 

4 minutes ago, Jaxy59 said:

this journey that it takes TIME: Things I Must Earn.

 

You're becoming wise very early on.  Yes, it takes lots of time, but in the end it's going to be well worth it.  

 

5 minutes ago, Jaxy59 said:

A lot of my anxiety, burning symptoms are stemming from food triggers. I’m getting bloodwork done Monday and meeting with a nutritionist on Wednesday that will test my food in

 

Good to hear.  Let us know what they find.

 

6 minutes ago, Jaxy59 said:

I’m really working on getting closer to God and meditation multiple times a day.

 

Nice!

 

6 minutes ago, Jaxy59 said:

Thank you again for being you. Youve been incredibly helpful.  Hope you have a great weekend!

 

Aww you're very welcome.  I hope I've been of some help.  I hope you and your family enjoy your weekend as well.  😘

[Magenta]

Hi @Jaxy59hope you’re doing well! I found your post as I’m sitting here currently up with instead burning in my stomach and chest, I think acid reflux but I didn’t think I’ve been eating enough to have that problem. I hope you get good guidance from the nutritionist!!

[Jaxy59]

Hi @Magenta I absolutely know that feeling. My burning in the chest is always accompanied with terrible anxiety. After lots of research and experimenting with foods, it all comes down to the disruption in the gut that is caused by the long term use of SSRI. For me, my body is readjusting and having to create more digestive enzymes. The burning for me is caused by high histamine foods (not all) so I’ve been doing an elimination diet to figure what works for me. The nutritionist has helped me come up with a meal plan to help get my gut back to normal. Ur guts and brains are very tightly connected so I’ve been dedicated to working on both diligently. It absolutely gets better. Maybe take note of things you eat and eliminate things here and there to see what are your triggers. Food sensitivities are a very common issue in withdrawal. Compared to a few weeks ago, the burning has subsided tremendously. It took a long time to figure out what it was but with strength and perseverance by God, I’ve come to learn a lot and feel that this journey is inevitably helping me thrive as a brand new version of myself. Please reach out anytime. It just comes down to your gut having to restore itself. Food sensitivity also causes anxiety, depression, negative thoughts, acid reflux, bloating, etc. 

[Jaxy59]

@Catwoman73Hi there. So I got some bloodwork done and my serotonin level is low. I need to raise and I was thinking of omega 3 fatty acid. Any help as far as brand, dose, etc? 

[Jaxy59]

@Catwoman73I have found Nordic Naturals Ultimate Omega that is 1280mg (2 soft gels a day) (EPA: 650mg and DHA: 450mg). I saw on this site that this is a good brand. Do I take as suggested would you say? Is it enough? 

[Jaxy59]

@Catwoman73 of course now I’m worried that my serotonin level is so low. Is this normal? Will it eventually build back up? 

[Catwoman73]

Serotonin is made in the gut, which is heavily affected by withdrawal. Lots of people end up with leaky gut and all sorts of nutritional deficiencies etc when in withdrawal.  Keep going with a healthy, whole foods diet to assist with gut healing, and your serotonin levels will normalize eventually.  Start slow with any supplements, including Omega-3's just to make sure you tolerate them ok.  I have just started eating fish again, after years of being fully vegan, in order to help boost my Omega-3 intake.  I also eat flax every day, without fail. I'm always a fan of trying to do things naturally before supplementing, but lots here supplement quite successfully.  

[Jaxy59]

@Catwoman73 Thank you. I was really freaked out when I saw my serotonin level was only 9 and should be within 50 and up.  So that’s all normal as my body starts to build its own? Now I don’t eat any seafood except maybe once or twice a year. If I took omega, do I take 1 pill to start even though it’s recommended 2 a day? How long does it typically take to heal the gut and increase serotonin?

[Jaxy59]

@Catwoman73 All other bloodwork was normal. Vitamin b12, vitamin d, magnesium, etc. 

[Magenta]

6 hours ago, Jaxy59 said:

Hi @Magenta I absolutely know that feeling. My burning in the chest is always accompanied with terrible anxiety. After lots of research and experimenting with foods, it all comes down to the disruption in the gut that is caused by the long term use of SSRI. For me, my body is readjusting and having to create more digestive enzymes. The burning for me is caused by high histamine foods (not all) so I’ve been doing an elimination diet to figure what works for me. The nutritionist has helped me come up with a meal plan to help get my gut back to normal. Ur guts and brains are very tightly connected so I’ve been dedicated to working on both diligently. It absolutely gets better. Maybe take note of things you eat and eliminate things here and there to see what are your triggers. Food sensitivities are a very common issue in withdrawal. Compared to a few weeks ago, the burning has subsided tremendously. It took a long time to figure out what it was but with strength and perseverance by God, I’ve come to learn a lot and feel that this journey is inevitably helping me thrive as a brand new version of myself. Please reach out anytime. It just comes down to your gut having to restore itself. Food sensitivity also causes anxiety, depression, negative thoughts, acid reflux, bloating, etc. 

thank you!! I struggled last night and am having some yogurt this morning. The problem is I don’t feel I’m eating anything risky because I’m having trouble eating in general so it’s all very simple and easy foods but I’ve started a journal and hope that will give me some insight. I struggle with agoraphobia so I can’t really get seen by a doctor easily for help with this but I do have an at home urgent care number o can call if needed. I almost called an ambulance last night because the burnin was so bad I thought my stomach was going to explode but I drank some water and that helped. Luckily someone else in the house was awake and could help me. It’s so hard to have never had issues with digestion and eating and to have it now be a very present issue. It sounds like you have a great plan and a great nutritionist. Maybe I’ll look into nutritionists and see if I can find any that do virtual. 

[Jaxy59]

@Catwoman73 another question. So in trying to heal leaky gut and me reacting to histamine foods, how do I get any probiotics to help heal my gut if I can’t have fermented foods. I would need to take a probiotic but should I be worried to do that? 

[Catwoman73]

4 hours ago, Jaxy59 said:

@Catwoman73 Thank you. I was really freaked out when I saw my serotonin level was only 9 and should be within 50 and up.  So that’s all normal as my body starts to build its own? Now I don’t eat any seafood except maybe once or twice a year. If I took omega, do I take 1 pill to start even though it’s recommended 2 a day? How long does it typically take to heal the gut and increase serotonin?

 

That would work.  You could even empty part of a caplet or cut a single tablet to start slower if you like.  I took this years ago, back in my running days- liquid formulations really do lend themselves to slowly increasing your dose!

 

https://ca-en.florahealth.com/products/udos-choice-oil-blend-369?variant=40412239691950

 

1 hour ago, Jaxy59 said:

@Catwoman73 another question. So in trying to heal leaky gut and me reacting to histamine foods, how do I get any probiotics to help heal my gut if I can’t have fermented foods. I would need to take a probiotic but should I be worried to do that? 

 

Personally, I'm a fan of just eating super clean for gut health.  I aim to get at least 30 varieties of fruits and veggies per week in my diet, very minimal added sugar and white flour, and try to stick with whole grains wherever I can.  Some here have had some success taking probiotics though- here's our thread on probiotics and gut health to help you decide what's best for you!

 

Probiotics and Gut Health