sallclops: Sally withdrawal and worried about my body

[sallclops]

Hello all, my name is Sally, I’m 35 years old and am full of regret and terrified for my future.  I’m not sure how to attach my complete med list on here though, in all honesty, I wouldn’t know the doses and timeframes verbatim anyway.  I know my SSRI use started slightly under 20 years ago on Prozac, but I think I must have come off at some point , maybe during my pregnancy back in 2013.  I know I went back on again, perhaps for PPD.  I also had an alcohol addiction that unfortunately restarted a few months after my baby was born, which makes me feel regretful as well.  I quit alcohol for good during Covid lockdown (I was a binge drinker). At some point after, I know I stopped taking the Prozac, called doctor (I don’t remember what was going on but probably withdrawal symptoms though I wouldn’t have known it at the time) and she put me on Effexor. I believe I was started at 75mg and then bumped up to 150mg sometime later.  
  About five years ago, I screwed up the doses due to intense stress of a schooling program I was in and I ended up tripping my brains out; serotonin syndrome maybe.  After this incident I knew I had to come off.  Again my memory is very fuzzy on this, but quite a time later, maybe a year or so, I went back down to 75 mg and stayed for awhile.  Then we went to 37.5 for a few months with doctor telling me to do a pill every other day , but I should have been in better contact with her, she probably would have had me keep it going through this winter, but I did the very other day for about a month and then I stopped this last August.

I was “ok” for a few weeks, albeit angsty as heck and then thanksgiving came around and a slew of panic attacks erupted. I also had severe gut inflammation, clenching and twinging all through the digestive tract.  I also developed a bizarre sensation in my urethra, which feels like something is out of place and makes me feel so broken.  I didn’t realize I was suffering from an SSRI injury until the beginning of January, after doing tons of research.   Sleep has been terrible, when I feel myself relaxing, my body jolts me back and I feel like I wasn’t breathing.  I sent a message to my doctor about having protracted withdrawal and she replied that this is not a thing, that I was only on 37.5 mg and that wouldn’t cause anything.  So, although I want medical intervention to help what’s going on, I truly do not trust the help, as I assume she will aim to put me right back on a full dose of Effexor.   After reading on here, it seems like this could be quite disastrous.  I’ve been wondering if it’s perhaps too late to even attempt to fix this with a return to SSRI’s (or SNRI’s) though, if I knew it would fix my symptoms, I definitely would.  But I have read many peoples accounts saying that it made things worse, and the literature on this site (thankful I found it) stating that “the dominoes have already fallen” leads me to believe this is the case.  It’s been five and a half months since I stopped the drug, and about 1.5 months since the panic and withdrawal has set in.  I’m wondering what others of you think about reinstatement at this time?  I’m so scared that my quality of life and body have been disastrously affected and I may never return to a normal feeling.  I want to be here and be strong for my daughter but I’m so scared.  I have started taking fish oil 1000 mg twice a day, and Metamucil tablets for “constipation” (gastro said that was the issue, but again they don’t really seem to care).  I do have magnesium 250 mg I took once and had a terrible sleep, but it probably wasn’t even due to that.  I see magnesium glycinate is the better choice and I should get that instead maybe.  I’ve also been using CBD oil.  I quit vaping marijuana during the panic episodes and I thought perhaps withdrawal from that might be making things worse.   I appreciate anyone’s help and input, thank you so much.

Edited Friday at 07:50 PM by Emonda
Name to title

[sallclops]

I tried posting yesterday but I cannot seem to find it, so I apologize if I’ve done something wrong, but I’m desperate for some advice.  I stopped taking Effexor mid August after following tapering instructions from my doctor, but we weren’t in direct communication during this time.  I realize now all the mistakes I have made in this process and am filled with a horrendous amount of regret.  I believe I have protracted withdrawal, as the intense symptoms did not start until this past November 21.  My entire gut became inflamed, my anxiety skyrocketed and I have pressure in my urethra that makes me feel like I’m prolapsing.  I’m worried that I’m developing auto immune issues from all this and am looking for advice.  Does reinstatement seem too risky for me right now?  Could it possibly reverse these bodily effects I’m experiencing or has it been too long and I ought to continue med free?  I’m so scared, I know I’ve screwed myself and am worried about my life expectancy especially since I have a child who needs me.  It’s been about 5 months since completely stopping the Effexor.  

[Jane318]

Greetings @sallclops and welcome to SA.  We are a community of volunteers providing peer support in the tapering of psychiatric medications and their associated withdrawal syndromes. 

 

Thank you for completing your drug signature - can you please indicate whether you were taking the IR or ER form?  Do you have any left on hand?

 

I am sorry for all you are suffering right now.  Believe me, I can relate as I found myself in a similar place last summer after a too-fast taper off Effexor.  I want to assure you that you will recover and heal from this.  Our bodies are designed to heal.

 

On 1/9/2025 at 7:10 AM, sallclops said:

I went back down to 75 mg and stayed for awhile.  Then we went to 37.5 for a few months with doctor telling me to do a pill every other day , but I should have been in better contact with her, she probably would have had me keep it going through this winter, but I did the very other day for about a month and then I stopped this last August.

Unfortunately, you received ill-informed guidance from your doctor.  Most doctors do not understand how these powerful drugs affect our brains and how to go about discontinuing them safely.  

 

On 1/9/2025 at 7:10 AM, sallclops said:

I was “ok” for a few weeks...  I didn’t realize I was suffering from an SSRI injury until the beginning of January, after doing tons of research.

It is not unusual for withdrawal symptoms to worsen several week or even months later.

 

On 1/9/2025 at 7:10 AM, sallclops said:

 I’ve been wondering if it’s perhaps too late to even attempt to fix this with a return to SSRI’s (or SNRI’s) though, if I knew it would fix my symptoms, I definitely would.  But I have read many peoples accounts saying that it made things worse, and the literature on this site (thankful I found it) stating that “the dominoes have already fallen” leads me to believe this is the case.  It’s been five and a half months since I stopped the drug, and about 1.5 months since the panic and withdrawal has set in.  I’m wondering what others of you think about reinstatement at this time?

Reinstatement of a very small dose of the original drug is the only known way to help alleviate withdrawal syndrome.  It isn’t a guarantee of diminished symptoms but it’s the best tactic available.   While it is best to reinstate as soon as possible after withdrawal symptoms occur and it predictably works only up to about 3 months after last dose, we have seen reinstatement help outside that window.  If you wish to try it, I would recommend trying 2 or 3 mg, no more.  If symptoms worsen right after taking the drug, stop.  Otherwise, wait a week or so to see if symptoms improve.  If they do, hold at at that dose.  If no improvement, increase by another 0.5 or 1 mg and repeat.  I takes about 4 days for blood levels to stabilize at the new dose, a few days longer for the brain.   The goal is to find the lowest dose at which symptoms start to improve - going too high can induce kindling, which can be quite difficult to recover from.  Once you find a dose that helps alleviate symptoms, you will want to hold at that dose for as long as it takes to stabilize - it will likely take several months.

 

Recommend you read:

 

About Reinstating and Stabilizing to Reduce Withdrawal Symptoms

How long does it take to stabilize after reinstating or updosing?

Hypersensitivity and kindling

 

Here is information about tapering Effexor, which includes how to prepare low doses:  Tips for tapering off Effexor and Effexor XR (venlafaxine)

 

Once you stabilize, you can begin a slow taper down to zero.  We can send you information about safely tapering later.

 

This is your introduction topic.  Each member gets one intro topic- please post updates and questions here, in this thread.

 

Let me know what you decide, if you have any questions.  Best wishes.

[thenextguy]

 

On 1/9/2025 at 7:10 AM, sallclops said:

 I sent a message to my doctor about having protracted withdrawal and she replied that this is not a thing, that I was only on 37.5 mg and that wouldn’t cause anything.  So, although I want medical intervention to help what’s going on, I truly do not trust the help, as I assume she will aim to put me right back on a full dose of Effexor.

 

It's hard to imagine that the medical system has allowed this massive blind spot to develop and that it still exists today, right? But as you seem to recognize, it is very real and, unfortunately, it's not that rare. You've come the right place for info though.

 

Jane has given you some good advice about reinstating. It would be ideal if you were closer to your "stop" date, but it might be worth trying a very small dose to see how you feel. 

 

 

[sallclops]

2 hours ago, Jane318 said:

Greetings @sallclops and welcome to SA.  We are a community of volunteers providing peer support in the tapering of psychiatric medications and their associated withdrawal syndromes. 

 

Thank you for completing your drug signature - can you please indicate whether you were taking the IR or ER form?  Do you have any left on hand?

 

I am sorry for all you are suffering right now.  Believe me, I can relate as I found myself in a similar place last summer after a too-fast taper off Effexor.  I want to assure you that you will recover and heal from this.  Our bodies are designed to heal.

 

Unfortunately, you received ill-informed guidance from your doctor.  Most doctors do not understand how these powerful drugs affect our brains and how to go about discontinuing them safely.  

 

It is not unusual for withdrawal symptoms to worsen several week or even months later.

 

Reinstatement of a very small dose of the original drug is the only known way to help alleviate withdrawal syndrome.  It isn’t a guarantee of diminished symptoms but it’s the best tactic available.   While it is best to reinstate as soon as possible after withdrawal symptoms occur and it predictably works only up to about 3 months after last dose, we have seen reinstatement help outside that window.  If you wish to try it, I would recommend trying 2 or 3 mg, no more.  If symptoms worsen right after taking the drug, stop.  Otherwise, wait a week or so to see if symptoms improve.  If they do, hold at at that dose.  If no improvement, increase by another 0.5 or 1 mg and repeat.  I takes about 4 days for blood levels to stabilize at the new dose, a few days longer for the brain.   The goal is to find the lowest dose at which symptoms start to improve - going too high can induce kindling, which can be quite difficult to recover from.  Once you find a dose that helps alleviate symptoms, you will want to hold at that dose for as long as it takes to stabilize - it will likely take several months.

 

Recommend you read:

 

About Reinstating and Stabilizing to Reduce Withdrawal Symptoms

How long does it take to stabilize after reinstating or updosing?

Hypersensitivity and kindling

 

Here is information about tapering Effexor, which includes how to prepare low doses:  Tips for tapering off Effexor and Effexor XR (venlafaxine)

 

Once you stabilize, you can begin a slow taper down to zero.  We can send you information about safely tapering later.

 

This is your introduction topic.  Each member gets one intro topic- please post updates and questions here, in this thread.

 

Let me know what you decide, if you have any questions.  Best wishes

 

Jane, thank you so much for your reply!  I wasn’t sure how to reply to you hence the large quote in here, I’m not well suited to technological things.

The only Effexor I have left is 150 mg and it’s from march 2023, label says to discard by march 2024.  I wish I could make up my mind about this!!  I wonder if the damage is done in terms of my gut and bladder and will adding the drug back possibly make these worse?  There’s no way to know.  On the other hand, will NOT going back on be worse off for my body?  I read about people developing auto immune disease 9 months into withdrawal but how to know if reinstatement could prevent that?  It’s such a huge risk/gamble on either choice and it’s driving me crazy.  There’s so much regret and I don’t even feel safe making a solid choice.  I read on the tapering link about hypersensitivity and about once you’ve reached the point I was at that it’s most likely too late.  But then I read that other people were able to and gahhh I just don’t know!  My gut has calmed down slightly, though I don’t think I’ll be able to eat the way I used to again.  I feel it moving in weird ways and spasming at times, and I do not eliminate like I used to.  I’m scared I’m going to be hit with multiple health issues and my 10 year old will watch her mom disintegrate 😭.  Thank you again for commenting, it means so much.

[sallclops]

2 hours ago, thenextguy said:

 

 

It's hard to imagine that the medical system has allowed this massive blind spot to develop and that it still exists today, right? But as you seem to recognize, it is very real and, unfortunately, it's not that rare. You've come the right place for info though.

 

Jane has given you some good advice about reinstating. It would be ideal if you were closer to your "stop" date, but it might be worth trying a very small dose to see how you feel. 

 

 

Thank you for commenting!  Yes the fact that I’m five months out from the stop date is what’s really concerning me.  Ive been somewhat “ok” the past couple of days, but still very anxious, especially in the morning.  Not so ok today, however,  very terrified of what’s going to happen to my body after reading some things.  I’m not sure if reinstatement would fix the toll already taken on my gut and urinary system.  No one probably knows, that’s what makes this all so hard.  I also keep anticipating bad things happening to my loved ones and not being able to handle it.  Or if I keep spiraling downward, end up with more disease and then my daughter has to endure that.  It’s torture, life is so painful.  Thank you for caring.

[Jane318]

I encourage you to reject the "what if" fears - The fear will only work against you. I understand you want to do the research to help you decide.  But every person is different, so reading others' stories can be helpful, but they are not YOU.  Our bodies were designed to heal.   I too have regrets, but we cannot change the past, so beating ourselves up doesn't help either.  

 

It seems you are improving somewhat.  If you think you can hang in there, you will likely feel a lot better after a few months. Otherwise, trying a very small dose to see how you feel is pretty low risk.  If it make you feel worse right away, stop it.

 

Recommended reading about withdrawal:

What is withdrawal syndrome.

Brain Remodelling 

Video:  Healing From Antidepressants - Patterns of Recovery

 

Also, whether you reinstate or not, you will have periods where you feel better, and periods where you feel terrible.  This is what we call the windows and waves pattern of stabilization.  This is actually a good sign of healing!  Read more about windows and waves here:   The Windows and Waves Pattern of Stabilization

 

Here are some threads that may help you cope with your symptoms:

 Non-drug techniques to cope with emotional symptoms

 

Ways to cope with daily anxiety

"Change the channel" - dealing with cognitive symptoms

Dealing With Emotional Spirals

Symptoms and self-care

Getting Started With Mindfulness

Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT) for anxiety, depression, withdrawal symptoms, insomnia

 

May you receive wisdom in your decision.

[sallclops]

Thank you Jane, I'm trying to decide the best course of action here, still don't know.  The links you've provided have been very informative, it's so hard to know what to do.  It's hard waking up in the morning and feeling the weight and dread of this catastrophic life change.  It's hard getting my daughter on the bus and then being alone with my brain and dumb urethra.  I wish I could go back to sleep after getting her on, but the cortisol spikes make it very hard.  I'm utterly terrified of what's to come. 

 

I see you use an extensive list of supplements, what made you choose the Magnesium Threonate?  I'm guessing these supplements have been beneficial for you, could you tell me what has improved for you while on these?  I did get fish oil and magnesium, but it's plain magnesium and it's 250 mg and i was worried it was the wrong type/too much.  I also have been using CBD oil, which I understand is a bit controversial.  I started using it because I quit vaping marijuana once WD hit and thought the quick cessation might have been stressing my body more.  Thanks!

[Jane318]

5 hours ago, sallclops said:

I'm utterly terrified of what's to come.

Again, I encourage you to fight that fear.  None of us can knows what will happen to us tomorrow.  Focus on the fact that your body is healing.

 

5 hours ago, sallclops said:

I see you use an extensive list of supplements, what made you choose the Magnesium Threonate?  I'm guessing these supplements have been beneficial for you, could you tell me what has improved for you while on these?

Some of the supplements are part of a nutrition program I adopted several years ago (The Root Cause Protocol) - before I started tapering, although I stopped several others when I went into severe withdrawal last summer.   Some are for thyroid support because I am hypothyroid.  So those are things I have been taking for a long time to address fatigue, mainly.  Magnesium was the turning point for me - I really noticed improvement when I started taking it.  I ussed to take Mg glycinate, but switched to the threonate form because it apparently can cross the blood-brain barrier, which I thought might support healing.  But who knows for sure?    There are many forms available, some can cause digestive / bowel upsets - but whatever you can tolerate is fine to use.  I've read as rule of thumb: 10 mg per KG body weight.  

 

Although I prefer / try to get nutrients from food, I recently added the B vitamins because my labs showed my levels were sub-optimal and dropping despite all my best efforts.  B vitamins seem to cause problems for some people who are tapering, though.

6 hours ago, sallclops said:

I also have been using CBD oil, which I understand is a bit controversial.  I started using it because I quit vaping marijuana once WD hit and thought the quick cessation might have been stressing my body more

I don't know a lot about CBD oil. I do urge you to shun all marijuana and other recreational substances and drugs that affect neurotransmitters - you want to avoid adding fuel to the fire.  Even some OTC drugs and prescriptions drugs like antibiotics can cause havoc for people who are in withdrawal or tapering.  

 

If you haven't already, suggest this thread: Important topics about tests, supplements, treatments, diet.

 

You can also search the site to read about others' experiences: https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/search/

 

Hope this helps!

 

 

[sallclops]

On 1/11/2025 at 7:06 PM, Jane318 said:

Again, I encourage you to fight that fear.  None of us can knows what will happen to us tomorrow.  Focus on the fact that your body is healing.

 

Some of the supplements are part of a nutrition program I adopted several years ago (The Root Cause Protocol) - before I started tapering, although I stopped several others when I went into severe withdrawal last summer.   Some are for thyroid support because I am hypothyroid.  So those are things I have been taking for a long time to address fatigue, mainly.  Magnesium was the turning point for me - I really noticed improvement when I started taking it.  I ussed to take Mg glycinate, but switched to the threonate form because it apparently can cross the blood-brain barrier, which I thought might support healing.  But who knows for sure?    There are many forms available, some can cause digestive / bowel upsets - but whatever you can tolerate is fine to use.  I've read as rule of thumb: 10 mg per KG body weight.  

 

Although I prefer / try to get nutrients from food, I recently added the B vitamins because my labs showed my levels were sub-optimal and dropping despite all my best efforts.  B vitamins seem to cause problems for some people who are tapering, though.

I don't know a lot about CBD oil. I do urge you to shun all marijuana and other recreational substances and drugs that affect neurotransmitters - you want to avoid adding fuel to the fire.  Even some OTC drugs and prescriptions drugs like antibiotics can cause havoc for people who are in withdrawal or tapering.  

 

If you haven't already, suggest this thread: Important topics about tests, supplements, treatments, diet.

 

You can also search the site to read about others' experiences: https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/search/

 

Hope this helps!

 

 

Very helpful, thank you so much for taking all this time to respond to my questions.  Picked up mag glyc as I couldn’t find the theonate and I’ll see how it goes.