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AliG

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Hi,  I've been reading here for a couple of days and hope to get some ideas and suggestions.

I was always told from the medical field- "you have a chemical imbalance" -  depression and put on antidepressants for many years.

About 10 months ago , I decided to go the natural route - exercise, sunlight, vitamin D, supplements etc. thinking that was the answer. I fell in a heap. I couldn't work it out until I found this site.  I was in withdrawal, but didn't realize it.

This has happened a few times, and I have always gone back on the drugs believing I needed them.

I came on here to find a voice of reason and maybe talk / learn from those who have lived through this.  I'm really glad I found this site and I hope I can learn from all of you but hopefully also contribute.

Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014

 

                                                  Psych Drug - free since May 2014
.
         

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Hi there  AliG ,  I'm waving at you from Sydney.

 

You've landed in an amazing place .. there's loads of information here related to antidepressants and other psychiatric meds., as you've been finding out.   

 

I've had a similar history , and never knew a thing about withdrawal until 2013.    You'll find lots of kindred spirits here :).

 

In the Relationships section , there's a thread for Australia members - please register.    Let me know if you'd like to meet up with someone socially . . . a few of us have been doing that with great success.

 

Once again , welcome to the club none of us want to be in!

 

We all understand you.

 

Best wishes ,   Fresh

1987-1997 pertofran , prothiaden , Prozac 1997-2002 Zoloft 2002-2004 effexor 2004-2010 Lexapro 40mg

2010-2012Cymbalta 120mg

Sept. 2012 -decreased 90mg in 6months. Care taken over by Dr Lucire in March 2013 , decreased last 30mg at 2mg per week over 3 months. July 21 , 2013- last dose of Cymbalta

Protracted withdrawal syndrome kicked in badly Jan.2014 Unrelenting akathisia until May 2014. Voluntary hosp. admission. Cocktail of Seroquel, Ativan and mirtazapine and I was well enough to go home after 14 days. Stopped all hosp. meds in next few months.

July 2014 felt v.depressed - couldn't stop crying. Started pristiq 50mg. Felt improvement within days and continued to improve, so stayed on 50mg for 8 months.

Began taper 28 Feb. 2015. Pristiq 50mg down to 45mg. Had one month of w/d symptoms. Started CES therapy in March. No w/d symptoms down to 30mg.

October 2015 , taking 25mg Pristiq. Capsules compounded with slow-release additive.

March 2016 , 21mg

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Hi AliG

 

Welcome to SA. I agree, your falling in a heap was probably withdrawal. Many drs are clueless about this. I thought I had some underlying condition that caused dizziness nausea extreme insomnia etc. then I found stuff on withdrawal and this site.

 

Do you have any questions? Are you experiencing any symptoms now?

 

Dalsaan

Please note - I am not a medical practitioner and I do not give medical advice. I offer an opinion based on my own experiences, reading and discussion with others.On Effexor for 2 months at the start of 2005. Had extreme insomnia as an adverse reaction. Changed to mirtazapine. Have been trying to get off since mid 2008 with numerous failures including CTs and slow (but not slow enough tapers)Have slow tapered at 10 per cent or less for years. I have liquid mirtazapine made at a compounding chemist.

Was on 1.6 ml as at 19 March 2014.

Dropped to 1.5 ml 7 June 2014. Dropped to 1.4 in about September.

Dropped to 1.3 on 20 December 2014. Dropped to 1.2 in mid Jan 2015.

Dropped to 1 ml in late Feb 2015. I think my old medication had run out of puff so I tried 1ml when I got the new stuff and it seems to be going ok. Sleep has been good over the last week (as of 13/3/15).

Dropped to 1/2 ml 14/11/15 Fatigue still there as are memory and cognition problems. Sleep is patchy but liveable compared to what it has been in the past.

 

DRUG FREE - as at 1st May 2017

 

>My intro post is here - http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/2250-dalsaan

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Welcome. You will find loads of information here. Glad you finally realize what is happening to you. Now you can make informed decisions about your health and wellbeing. I am almost 8 months off Paxil.

2002-put on amitryptiline for fibromyalgia. 10mg.2004-stopped abruptly. Didn't think it helped.2006 approx.-put on Paxil for mild anxiety 20 mg.2007 upped to 40 mg. not sure why.2011- tapered from 40 to 10. went nuts and went back to 20mg2014- tapered from 20mg to 0 from April to The end of June.current meds- Metformin(type 2 diabetic) and low dose aspirin.Take multi vitamin and vit b12, vit. D and magnesium. 5 months off Paxil. Still suffering.recently added 1.2mg of Paxil to alleviate withdrawals.(Nov 30)Dropped to .9mg because having symptoms from reinstatement.(dec 23)<p>taper to .76mg-.8mg (Feb 3) approx. weight .010 to about .008-.009 on scale.
.6mg (march 19th.) .5mg(April 19th)
.4mg(April 27th)
.2 (June 27th)

0mg.  done taper at beginning of August.

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Welcome AliG. I am not at all new to the ploys of Big Pharma. My daughter was poisoned by an antibiotic 5 years ago, when she was 16, and has suffered nerve damage--possibly permanent. Struggling through this with her is what made me want to get off all my medications. I was prescribed Zoloft for Chronic Fatigue Syndrome--not depression. I never had depression, and my doctor knew this. I did not, however know about withdrawal, and tapered 100 mg. in 6 weeks, so now, almost 7 months out, I find myself suffering. Hope you are able to get lots of help here!

Zoloft 100 mg. daily for Chronic Fatigue Syndrome since Oct. 1994 / Synthroid 88 mcg. daily / Supplements: Neptune Krill Oil-1,000 mg. twice daily/Astaxanthin 10 mg. twice daily/Ubiquinol 100 mg. twice daily (These 3 have allowed me to discontinue (approved by doctor) bp meds I was on. Calcium Citrate 500 mg. daily/Vitamin D3 2,400 iu daily/K2 (MK7) 100 mcg daily (osteopenia and fam. hist. of severe osteoporosis). Stress B Complex (1/2 dose)/Quercetin (for allergies/asthma)/Magnesium (400 mg. oral glycinate and about 50 mg. magnesium chloride spray oil a day, divided throughout day).

Tapered Zoloft about 6 wks. Totally off since the end of July (25-29, 2014). 3 wks. vertigo at end of taper, then 3-4 wks. OK, followed by withdrawal symptoms increasing in severity (nausea, gastric disturbances, loss of appetite, insomnia, restlessness, jitters, anxiety, agitation--jumping out of my skin--possible akathisia?) Seem to have paradoxical reactions to everything new, even Vitamin C. Severity of akathisia comes and goes, but is constant to some degree. Hard to leave house, and cannot be home alone. (Retired)

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Hey HomeGirl!  Welcome!

 

What can we help you with?

 

As I understand it, you have been off the AD's for 10 months?  

 

Have you noticed a windows and waves pattern - times when you are sinking, caught in a rip, feeling agony - and the windows, where you are surfing on top, seeing 360 of sunshine and water, and you are given hope?  

 

Here is one of the best descriptions ever of withdrawal, from our esteemed mod, Rhi:

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/603-what-is-antidepressant-withdrawal-syndrome/?p=88441

 

Here is information about the windows and waves pattern of withdrawal:

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/82-the-windows-and-waves-pattern-of-recovery/

 

Do you still have any more drugs to taper off of?  

 

What was the situation that got you on the drugs to begin with?

 

Have you tried magnesium? (I'm especially partial to Epsom Salts baths, or Mag Chloride baths)

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1300-magnesium-natures-calcium-channel-blocker/ 

 

Most of us use fish oil, as well:

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/36-king-of-supplements-omega-3-fatty-acids-fish-oil/

 

 

AliG writes:

I hope I can come on here and find a voice of reason. 

That you will.  It is the policy of SA to NOT suggest or push ANY drugs.  And your health decisions are YOUR choice, your responsibility.  You will receive expert suggestions, to help you choose the gentlest path to your recovery.

 

Did you happen to be at the Peter Goetzche talk in The Valley on Wednesday?  Or any of his other talks?  If yes, you would have heaved a sigh of relief - that someone "Gets it."  Because I'm certain your docs, and pdocs, do not.

 

Additionally, there's a thread just for Aussies to chat about our local issues.  You will find that I have posted my contact details there.  Egads!  So if you are brave enough, you can SMS me or email me directly.  I also have some local practitioners that have been helping me - and I'd be curious to know about your doctors and whether they were good doctors, bad doctors, or just doctors.   :P 

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/6284-australia-members-please-check-in-here/

 

Please, let us know how you're going, where you are on your journey.  Are you still on any drugs at all?  Or if you quit them, please adjust your signature so that we know how long you've been drug free, and whether you tapered, or went Cold Turkey (CT).

 

Again, welcome!

"Easy, easy - just go easy and you'll finish." - Hawaiian Kapuna

 

Holding is hard work, holding is a blessing. Give your brain time to heal before you try again.

 

My suggestions are not medical advice, you are in charge of your own medical choices.

 

A lifetime of being prescribed antidepressants that caused problems (30 years in total). At age 35 flipped to "bipolar," but was not diagnosed for 5 years. Started my journey in Midwest United States. Crossed the Pacific for love and hope; currently living in Australia.   CT Seroquel 25 mg some time in 2013.   Tapered Reboxetine 4 mg Oct 2013 to Sept 2014 = GONE (3 years on Reboxetine).     Tapered Lithium 900 to 475 MG (alternating with the SNRI) Jan 2014 - Nov 2014, tapered Lithium 475 mg Jan 2015 -  Feb 2016 = GONE (10 years  on Lithium).  Many mistakes in dry cutting dosages were made.


The tedious thread (my intro):  JanCarol ☼ Reboxetine first, then Lithium

The happy thread (my success story):  JanCarol - Undiagnosed  Off all bipolar drugs

My own blog:  https://shamanexplorations.com/shamans-blog/

 

 

I have been psych drug FREE since 1 Feb 2016!

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Welcome to SA. I am glad you saw the light and are well away from psych drugs.

2009: Cancer hospital said I had adjustment disorder because I thought they were doing it wrong. Their headshrinker prescribed Effexor, and my life set on a new course. I didn't know what was ahead, like a passenger on Disneyland's Matterhorn, smiling and waving as it climbs...clink, clink, clink.

2010: Post surgical accidental Effexor discontinuation by nurses, masked by intravenous Dilaudid. (The car is balanced at the top of the track.) I get home, pop a Vicodin, and ...

Whooosh...down, down, down, down, down...goes the trajectory of my life, up goes my mood and tendency to think everything is a good idea.
2012: After the bipolar jig was up, now a walking bag of unrelated symptoms, I went crazy on Daytrana (the Ritalin skin patch by Noven), because ADHD was a perfect fit for a bag of unrelated symptoms. I was prescribed Effexor for the nervousness of it, and things got neurological. An EEG showed enough activity to warrant an epilepsy diagnosis rather than non-epileptic ("psychogenic") seizures.

:o 2013-2014: Quit everything and got worse. I probably went through DAWS: dopamine agonist withdrawal syndrome. I drank to not feel, but I felt a lot: dread, fear, regret, grief: an utter sense of total loss of everything worth breathing about, for almost two years.

I was not suicidal but I wanted to be dead, at least dead to the experience of my own brain and body.

2015: I  began to recover after adding virgin coconut oil and organic grass-fed fed butter to a cup of instant coffee in the morning.

I did it hoping for mental acuity and better memory. After ten days of that, I was much better, mood-wise. Approximately neutral.

And, I experienced drowsiness. I could sleep. Not exactly happy, I did 30 days on Wellbutrin, because it had done me no harm in the past. 

I don't have the DAWS mood or state of mind. It never feel like doing anything if it means standing up.

In fact, I don't especially like moving. I'm a brain with a beanbag body.   :unsure:

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Hi everyone.Thanks for your words of welcome and encouragement. I haven't been back on here , for a few days,as I have been having problems. I have been off the Mianserin for 9 days, but I had only been back on A/D's for  2 weeks after a break of 10 months. I never did any tapering, ever so I don't know what that has done to me over the years of  using these meds. I have been suffering, feeling low and don't know what to do next. My husband wants me to go back on medication. He doesn't understand and thinks by my doing that I will be helping myself.  He wants me to move forward. I don't know how to do that at this stage. I am so confused. It is so easy to keep thinking that I need these drugs.

Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014

 

                                                  Psych Drug - free since May 2014
.
         

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Hey   Ali G , good to see you.    Thank you for filling in your signature.

 

Just so it's clear to everyone , could you add dates for the following:

- when you started the 10 month break from a/d's

- when you started on citalopram

-how long you took that , at what dose

-when you changed to miancerin , at what dose

- what date you ceased miancerin

 

This comes up every time you post , so anyone reading gets all that at a a glance.   In order to offer any constructive advice or suggestions , it's

important that we know these things.

 

I suspect that things got pretty bad after 10 months off , and that's why you started citalopram?

If at all possible , it would be good to avoid that situation returning.

 

Thanks Ali  :)

1987-1997 pertofran , prothiaden , Prozac 1997-2002 Zoloft 2002-2004 effexor 2004-2010 Lexapro 40mg

2010-2012Cymbalta 120mg

Sept. 2012 -decreased 90mg in 6months. Care taken over by Dr Lucire in March 2013 , decreased last 30mg at 2mg per week over 3 months. July 21 , 2013- last dose of Cymbalta

Protracted withdrawal syndrome kicked in badly Jan.2014 Unrelenting akathisia until May 2014. Voluntary hosp. admission. Cocktail of Seroquel, Ativan and mirtazapine and I was well enough to go home after 14 days. Stopped all hosp. meds in next few months.

July 2014 felt v.depressed - couldn't stop crying. Started pristiq 50mg. Felt improvement within days and continued to improve, so stayed on 50mg for 8 months.

Began taper 28 Feb. 2015. Pristiq 50mg down to 45mg. Had one month of w/d symptoms. Started CES therapy in March. No w/d symptoms down to 30mg.

October 2015 , taking 25mg Pristiq. Capsules compounded with slow-release additive.

March 2016 , 21mg

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Thanks Fresh. Yes, things did get bad.  I thought it was the depression worsening, as I had struggled during those 8 months, but now I'm thinking it was withdrawal symptoms. I haven't had as many acute symptoms as some here, but I  have had insomnia, weight gain, panic attacks (fairly recent thing), slight agorophobia, social isolation at times , and worsening of anxiety and depression. I just don't know what is normal anymore. I don't know what is the drugs and what is me!!

Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014

 

                                                  Psych Drug - free since May 2014
.
         

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Just wondering if there is any sort of time frame with withdrawal. Does anyone know how many years this can go on? Does it depend on how long you were on the medications?  Are we permanently damaged?  Also, I have a friend who has just recovered from cancer and she has been put on an antidepressant! I can't believe it.I have been taking fish oil- (a really good quality one) and  exercise. At the moment I'm going ok. I don't know how long this will last.

Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014

 

                                                  Psych Drug - free since May 2014
.
         

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Hi  Ali ,    the length of the withdrawal seems to be commensurate with the length of time you've been on and off antidepressants.

Some people have no problems after short stints ,   but with a long history like yourself (thanks for updating your sig.)   it's likely to be long-ish  :(

1987-1997 pertofran , prothiaden , Prozac 1997-2002 Zoloft 2002-2004 effexor 2004-2010 Lexapro 40mg

2010-2012Cymbalta 120mg

Sept. 2012 -decreased 90mg in 6months. Care taken over by Dr Lucire in March 2013 , decreased last 30mg at 2mg per week over 3 months. July 21 , 2013- last dose of Cymbalta

Protracted withdrawal syndrome kicked in badly Jan.2014 Unrelenting akathisia until May 2014. Voluntary hosp. admission. Cocktail of Seroquel, Ativan and mirtazapine and I was well enough to go home after 14 days. Stopped all hosp. meds in next few months.

July 2014 felt v.depressed - couldn't stop crying. Started pristiq 50mg. Felt improvement within days and continued to improve, so stayed on 50mg for 8 months.

Began taper 28 Feb. 2015. Pristiq 50mg down to 45mg. Had one month of w/d symptoms. Started CES therapy in March. No w/d symptoms down to 30mg.

October 2015 , taking 25mg Pristiq. Capsules compounded with slow-release additive.

March 2016 , 21mg

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Just wanted to thank everyone for their concern and help on this site. It is so comforting to talk to people who understand and have been through this. I seem to be going ok at the moment, except last night I couldnt sleep, at all. Out of the blue - total insomnia!! whats that all about? Anyway , thanks again.

Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014

 

                                                  Psych Drug - free since May 2014
.
         

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Hi AliG, I just read through some of your recent posts and wanted to make a few comments.

My husband wants me to go back on medication. He doesnt understand and thinks by my doing that I will be helping myself.

 

Its difficult when our family and friends don't understand how harmful these drugs actually are, its taken me a while, but I've been able to get my family to know the truth now, and having that support can help a lot. 

 

I'd highly recommend reading Anatomy of an Epidemic by Robert Whitaker. and if possible, get your husband to read it.

 

Other resources you may find helpful are Your Drug may be you Problem by Dr. Peter Breggin and Council for Evidence Based Psychiatry

 

Just wondering if there is any sort of time frame with withdrawal. Does anyone know how many years this can go on? Does it depend on how long you were on the medications?  Are we permanently damaged? 

 

Its impossible to know how long withdrawal will last, everyone is different, since I've been here on the site, I've followed lots of stories and I honestly can't seem to find any reliable patterns.  One thing I've noticed is that people who are on multiple drugs and have been for a long time, seem to take longer to recover, possibly because it takes longer to safely taper off multiple medications.  The damage isn't permanent, everyone gets better given enough time.  Some people do take a long time though.

 

... except last night I couldnt sleep, at all. Out of the blue - total insomnia!! whats that all about?

 

Unfortunately, insomnia is a common withdrawal symptom, hopefully you will be able to get some sleep tonight.  This topic has a lot of helpful information about sleep issues:

 

Important topics about symptoms, including sleep problems

 

Here is the link to our symptoms and self care section, you may find some useful ideas to help manage symptoms as you recover.  Especially read the topics pinned at the top.

 

Please feel free to write whenever you want, you will find a lot of friendly help and support here.  I’m glad you found us.

 

Petunia.

I'm not a doctor.  My comments are not medical advise. These are my opinions based on my own experience and what I've learned. Please discuss your situation with a medical practitioner who has knowledge of tapering and withdrawal...if you are lucky enough to find one.

My Introduction Thread

Full Drug and Withdrawal History

Brief Summary

Several SSRIs for 13 years starting 1997 (for mild to moderate partly situational anxiety) Xanax PRN ~ Various other drugs over the years for side effects

2 month 'taper' off Lexapro 2010

Short acute withdrawal, followed by 2 -3 months of improvement then delayed protracted withdrawal

DX ADHD followed by several years of stimulants and other drugs trying to manage increasing symptoms

Failed reinstatement of Lexapro and trial of Prozac (became suicidal)

May 2013 Found SA, learned about withdrawal, stopped taking drugs...healing begins.

Protracted withdrawal, with a very sensitized nervous system, slowly recovering as time passes

Supplements which have helped: Vitamin C, Magnesium, Taurine

Bad reactions: Many supplements but mostly fish oil and Vitamin D

June 2016 - Started daily juicing, mostly vegetables and lots of greens.

Aug 2016 - Oct 2016 Best window ever, felt almost completely recovered

Oct 2016 -Symptoms returned - bad days and less bad days.

April 2018 - No windows, but significant improvement, it feels like permanent full recovery is close.

VIDEO: Where did the chemical imbalance theory come from?



VIDEO: How are psychiatric diagnoses made?



VIDEO: Why do psychiatric drugs have withdrawal syndromes?



VIDEO: Can psychiatric drugs cause long-lasting negative effects?

VIDEO: Dr. Claire Weekes

 

 

 

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Thanks Petunia, for taking the time to read through my details and for the helpful comments. I notice you're also from Australia. How did you get the Robert Whitaker book. Its so hard to get decent books here, but I would love to read it.

Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014

 

                                                  Psych Drug - free since May 2014
.
         

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Hey Ali ,    JanCarol posted in the Australia room a while ago that she brought some books from the U.S.   Maybe check with her. -_-

1987-1997 pertofran , prothiaden , Prozac 1997-2002 Zoloft 2002-2004 effexor 2004-2010 Lexapro 40mg

2010-2012Cymbalta 120mg

Sept. 2012 -decreased 90mg in 6months. Care taken over by Dr Lucire in March 2013 , decreased last 30mg at 2mg per week over 3 months. July 21 , 2013- last dose of Cymbalta

Protracted withdrawal syndrome kicked in badly Jan.2014 Unrelenting akathisia until May 2014. Voluntary hosp. admission. Cocktail of Seroquel, Ativan and mirtazapine and I was well enough to go home after 14 days. Stopped all hosp. meds in next few months.

July 2014 felt v.depressed - couldn't stop crying. Started pristiq 50mg. Felt improvement within days and continued to improve, so stayed on 50mg for 8 months.

Began taper 28 Feb. 2015. Pristiq 50mg down to 45mg. Had one month of w/d symptoms. Started CES therapy in March. No w/d symptoms down to 30mg.

October 2015 , taking 25mg Pristiq. Capsules compounded with slow-release additive.

March 2016 , 21mg

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  • Moderator Emeritus

 How did you get the Robert Whitaker book. Its so hard to get decent books here, but I would love to read it.

 

Amazon.com,  if you click on the link to the book in my above post, it takes you to the site where you can order it.

I'm not a doctor.  My comments are not medical advise. These are my opinions based on my own experience and what I've learned. Please discuss your situation with a medical practitioner who has knowledge of tapering and withdrawal...if you are lucky enough to find one.

My Introduction Thread

Full Drug and Withdrawal History

Brief Summary

Several SSRIs for 13 years starting 1997 (for mild to moderate partly situational anxiety) Xanax PRN ~ Various other drugs over the years for side effects

2 month 'taper' off Lexapro 2010

Short acute withdrawal, followed by 2 -3 months of improvement then delayed protracted withdrawal

DX ADHD followed by several years of stimulants and other drugs trying to manage increasing symptoms

Failed reinstatement of Lexapro and trial of Prozac (became suicidal)

May 2013 Found SA, learned about withdrawal, stopped taking drugs...healing begins.

Protracted withdrawal, with a very sensitized nervous system, slowly recovering as time passes

Supplements which have helped: Vitamin C, Magnesium, Taurine

Bad reactions: Many supplements but mostly fish oil and Vitamin D

June 2016 - Started daily juicing, mostly vegetables and lots of greens.

Aug 2016 - Oct 2016 Best window ever, felt almost completely recovered

Oct 2016 -Symptoms returned - bad days and less bad days.

April 2018 - No windows, but significant improvement, it feels like permanent full recovery is close.

VIDEO: Where did the chemical imbalance theory come from?



VIDEO: How are psychiatric diagnoses made?



VIDEO: Why do psychiatric drugs have withdrawal syndromes?



VIDEO: Can psychiatric drugs cause long-lasting negative effects?

VIDEO: Dr. Claire Weekes

 

 

 

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Thanks  Petunia. While I'm at it , are there any other good books worth reading ?  Thanks also, Fresh. I'll check with JanCarol. I'M on day 18 off  drugs and I'm surprised at how well I'm doing, but I'm not overly confident. I realise this could be the lull before the storm !! I'm taking fish oil, magnesium oil spray , and vitamin D and just starting a whole foods plant based diet . We'll see how it goes. I'll keep you all posted. 

Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014

 

                                                  Psych Drug - free since May 2014
.
         

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I never answered a few people who welcomed me as I was a bit overwhelmed. Dalsaan, Frustrated, Luv2knit, JanCarol,Westcoast, Fresh and Petunia. Thank you for your kind words. I hope you are all going well.

I come from a dysfunctional family. I've done what I could to survive which took me down the path of psych. drugs to deal with my depression. I It has been a comfort to have read some of your stories and to realize that I am not alone in my struggle .

Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014

 

                                                  Psych Drug - free since May 2014
.
         

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  • Moderator Emeritus

AliG - I read all my Robert Whitaker books from the library!  Great price!  Free!  I find that Amazon has outrageous shipping to Australia, and I'm worried that they have bought Bookdepot and ABEbooks, too.   I think that's where my practitioners got them, too.

 

Sorry Fresh & AliG - I couldn't afford to pay excess baggage to bring the extra books home, so I gave them away or sold them.

 

Ali writes:  

 

 

just starting a whole foods plant based diet 

Um.  Brain needs fats.  Enzymes, aminos.  These are much more difficult to get from plant based diet.  You can try it - but watch your symptoms, and if you start to disregulate, I think you will find that your brain craves fish, organ meats, as well as the nuts and coconut oils that you may be using on your plant based diet.  Unless you have a moral obligation to avoid animal based products, I believe that your brain will heal faster using them.

 

In my own life, I've called meat a "mood stabiliser."  Since then I've learned about other ones, like magnesium, daily sun walks, and regular sleep patterns.

 

So I am still confused.  You are now off all drugs?  For like 15 days now?

 

How are your symptoms going?

 

Can you exercise?  Walking is the best, as the tick-tock motion seems to help balance the brain.  They don't have to be a big deal, if you can only walk 10 min a day, that's better than nothing!  Have you ever tried a yoga class?

 

Tell me about your mild agoraphobia.  Can you walk around your neighborhood?  Can you drive?  Is it people you are nervous about (social issues) or is it "out there" - out of the nest, out of the safe space of home?  Can you go to the shops?  

 

And here's how it is with me:  IF you go to the shops, do you then collapse in a heap and not want to talk or do anything because you've expended all your resources just doing the shopping?

 

It sounds like you are willing to do the extra work it takes to stay off of the drugs.  Some people come in here and say, "well I just want off them", but are unwilling to learn about the wellness and lifestyle essential for regulating their moods.  It sounds like you've already done some good work!

 

Keep in touch!

"Easy, easy - just go easy and you'll finish." - Hawaiian Kapuna

 

Holding is hard work, holding is a blessing. Give your brain time to heal before you try again.

 

My suggestions are not medical advice, you are in charge of your own medical choices.

 

A lifetime of being prescribed antidepressants that caused problems (30 years in total). At age 35 flipped to "bipolar," but was not diagnosed for 5 years. Started my journey in Midwest United States. Crossed the Pacific for love and hope; currently living in Australia.   CT Seroquel 25 mg some time in 2013.   Tapered Reboxetine 4 mg Oct 2013 to Sept 2014 = GONE (3 years on Reboxetine).     Tapered Lithium 900 to 475 MG (alternating with the SNRI) Jan 2014 - Nov 2014, tapered Lithium 475 mg Jan 2015 -  Feb 2016 = GONE (10 years  on Lithium).  Many mistakes in dry cutting dosages were made.


The tedious thread (my intro):  JanCarol ☼ Reboxetine first, then Lithium

The happy thread (my success story):  JanCarol - Undiagnosed  Off all bipolar drugs

My own blog:  https://shamanexplorations.com/shamans-blog/

 

 

I have been psych drug FREE since 1 Feb 2016!

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Hi AliG

 

The Book Depository does free shipping from the UK - http://m.bookdepository.com. I can recommend some good trauma books too if you like

 

Dalsaan

Please note - I am not a medical practitioner and I do not give medical advice. I offer an opinion based on my own experiences, reading and discussion with others.On Effexor for 2 months at the start of 2005. Had extreme insomnia as an adverse reaction. Changed to mirtazapine. Have been trying to get off since mid 2008 with numerous failures including CTs and slow (but not slow enough tapers)Have slow tapered at 10 per cent or less for years. I have liquid mirtazapine made at a compounding chemist.

Was on 1.6 ml as at 19 March 2014.

Dropped to 1.5 ml 7 June 2014. Dropped to 1.4 in about September.

Dropped to 1.3 on 20 December 2014. Dropped to 1.2 in mid Jan 2015.

Dropped to 1 ml in late Feb 2015. I think my old medication had run out of puff so I tried 1ml when I got the new stuff and it seems to be going ok. Sleep has been good over the last week (as of 13/3/15).

Dropped to 1/2 ml 14/11/15 Fatigue still there as are memory and cognition problems. Sleep is patchy but liveable compared to what it has been in the past.

 

DRUG FREE - as at 1st May 2017

 

>My intro post is here - http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/2250-dalsaan

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Thanks Dalsaan, I will have a look at that site - free shipping sounds good !


 


Thanks JanCarol.  Today is 20 days off all drugs. I understand about fats and protein. I've been on a paleo type diet but it wasn't helping and seemed to cause weight gain and I have to be very careful about cholesterol. I'm supposed to be on Statin drugs, but you know what I think about that?  "Hell no. I I just thought I would give this a go as an experiment to see if I felt better. However I'm having all the " healthy" fats - avocado, nuts etc.


 


Most of the time I force myself to push through . I do a lot of  positive self talk to get myself going.  I used to do Yoga and loved it. I want to start again. I also did a lot of walking but haven't lately mainly because of little energy.  I've put so many things on hold .


Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014

 

                                                  Psych Drug - free since May 2014
.
         

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AliG

 

Quite a number of people here have a difficult family history, including me.

 

The books I would recommend are by Babette Rothschild, particularly a The Body Remembers and 8 keys to Safe Trauma Recovery (link to website- http://www.somatictraumatherapy.com). I would also recommend Healing Developmental Trauma by Laurence Heller

http://www.drlaurenceheller.com

 

What I like about both of these is that they link the body and the mind and speak about nervous system dysregulation

 

Dalsaan

Please note - I am not a medical practitioner and I do not give medical advice. I offer an opinion based on my own experiences, reading and discussion with others.On Effexor for 2 months at the start of 2005. Had extreme insomnia as an adverse reaction. Changed to mirtazapine. Have been trying to get off since mid 2008 with numerous failures including CTs and slow (but not slow enough tapers)Have slow tapered at 10 per cent or less for years. I have liquid mirtazapine made at a compounding chemist.

Was on 1.6 ml as at 19 March 2014.

Dropped to 1.5 ml 7 June 2014. Dropped to 1.4 in about September.

Dropped to 1.3 on 20 December 2014. Dropped to 1.2 in mid Jan 2015.

Dropped to 1 ml in late Feb 2015. I think my old medication had run out of puff so I tried 1ml when I got the new stuff and it seems to be going ok. Sleep has been good over the last week (as of 13/3/15).

Dropped to 1/2 ml 14/11/15 Fatigue still there as are memory and cognition problems. Sleep is patchy but liveable compared to what it has been in the past.

 

DRUG FREE - as at 1st May 2017

 

>My intro post is here - http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/2250-dalsaan

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Thank you Dalsaan. That is very helpful. I will add them to my list of books to read. It's getting quite long.  I do like to read though which is good.

 

I'm feeling very, flat, tired and down today. I hardly got any sleep and I've just got no energy. I'm sick of the struggle. 

Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014

 

                                                  Psych Drug - free since May 2014
.
         

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I have found magnesium and taurine good for improving the quality of my sleep (in combination). You might give these a go yourself. If you do, start them separately and take a very low dose to start with to see how your body reacts.

 

D

Please note - I am not a medical practitioner and I do not give medical advice. I offer an opinion based on my own experiences, reading and discussion with others.On Effexor for 2 months at the start of 2005. Had extreme insomnia as an adverse reaction. Changed to mirtazapine. Have been trying to get off since mid 2008 with numerous failures including CTs and slow (but not slow enough tapers)Have slow tapered at 10 per cent or less for years. I have liquid mirtazapine made at a compounding chemist.

Was on 1.6 ml as at 19 March 2014.

Dropped to 1.5 ml 7 June 2014. Dropped to 1.4 in about September.

Dropped to 1.3 on 20 December 2014. Dropped to 1.2 in mid Jan 2015.

Dropped to 1 ml in late Feb 2015. I think my old medication had run out of puff so I tried 1ml when I got the new stuff and it seems to be going ok. Sleep has been good over the last week (as of 13/3/15).

Dropped to 1/2 ml 14/11/15 Fatigue still there as are memory and cognition problems. Sleep is patchy but liveable compared to what it has been in the past.

 

DRUG FREE - as at 1st May 2017

 

>My intro post is here - http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/2250-dalsaan

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Thanks Dalsaan..  I'm already taking Magnesium, but surprisingly don't know much about  taurine. I will investigate. Thanks for the tip. I actually have been taking valerian at night for sleep, which doesn't suit everyone, but it normally works for me.  There are just some nights where sleep is impossible. Its the withdrawal I suppose. Most of us have experienced this I assume. It just makes it so much harder to be proactive,and to care. Some days I just don't care anymore. However I know I just have to keep putting one foot in front of the other.

Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014

 

                                                  Psych Drug - free since May 2014
.
         

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Hi AliG, I can relate to the flat feeling - it seems to be a very common side effect - I am struggling with it as well, and as you said, just trying to keep putting one foot in front of the other. I generally have to force myself to do the things I need to do - thank God I'm not working right now! But we have to keep believing and telling each other that this flat, melancholy mood will eventually pass. As long as we maintain hope, we will be okay. So I am praying that you will feel hope today that you are slowly healing, and will one day see this as a distant memory. <<<HUGS>>>

2005-2009, Lexapro 10 - 20 mg, CT WD w/severe depression and anxiety:  2010-2015, Paxil, 30 - 40 mg, tapered off at 10 mg/week, moderate anxiety and depression:  2010-2015, Clonozapam 0.25 mg, as needed for anxiety and sleep:  1/10/2015, Zoloft 25 mg, tried to increase to 50 and 75, but nausea and dizziness:  2/13/2015, Paxil 5 mg, added back after 2 weeks at zero to reduce WD:  2/28/2015, Paxil 10 mg, increased from 5 mg to reduce WD, HOLDING:  3/04/2015, Zoloft discontinued (reduced to ~12.5 mg on 2/19, ~6.25 mg on 2/26, then zero):  4/26/2015, Paxil starting 10% taper (no scale so was inadvertently at 20% taper, yikes!):  4/30/2015, Paxil 10 mg, reinstated (WD disappeared between August 2015 and May 2016)

5/02/2016, Started 10% taper, reinstated to 10 mg on 5/11/16:  4/29/2017, Last dose of Paxil (working with holistic psychiatrist, lots of supplements to aid WD):  Primary symptoms: apathy, demotivation, anhedonia, fatigue, stress intolerance, moderate social anxiety

7/1/2018 Finally feeling like myself again, success!!! Praise God! Even with the stress of relocating recently, I am feeling pretty good most of the time now. Granted, I eat healthy, I exercise, I don't drink caffeine or alcohol and I try hard find a healthy balance of quiet and social times. Hang in there and keep the faith, you can do it too!

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Oh, experiment with the magnesium, I have found that although it helps with sleep, it can also make me lethargic - I think. I am experimenting with it myself, I took it faithfully for a long time but am sleeping fine (for the most part) right now without it.

2005-2009, Lexapro 10 - 20 mg, CT WD w/severe depression and anxiety:  2010-2015, Paxil, 30 - 40 mg, tapered off at 10 mg/week, moderate anxiety and depression:  2010-2015, Clonozapam 0.25 mg, as needed for anxiety and sleep:  1/10/2015, Zoloft 25 mg, tried to increase to 50 and 75, but nausea and dizziness:  2/13/2015, Paxil 5 mg, added back after 2 weeks at zero to reduce WD:  2/28/2015, Paxil 10 mg, increased from 5 mg to reduce WD, HOLDING:  3/04/2015, Zoloft discontinued (reduced to ~12.5 mg on 2/19, ~6.25 mg on 2/26, then zero):  4/26/2015, Paxil starting 10% taper (no scale so was inadvertently at 20% taper, yikes!):  4/30/2015, Paxil 10 mg, reinstated (WD disappeared between August 2015 and May 2016)

5/02/2016, Started 10% taper, reinstated to 10 mg on 5/11/16:  4/29/2017, Last dose of Paxil (working with holistic psychiatrist, lots of supplements to aid WD):  Primary symptoms: apathy, demotivation, anhedonia, fatigue, stress intolerance, moderate social anxiety

7/1/2018 Finally feeling like myself again, success!!! Praise God! Even with the stress of relocating recently, I am feeling pretty good most of the time now. Granted, I eat healthy, I exercise, I don't drink caffeine or alcohol and I try hard find a healthy balance of quiet and social times. Hang in there and keep the faith, you can do it too!

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Thanks Prestorb,  I'm sorry to hear you're in the same state.  Thanks for the hugs.  I think I've accepted this as my "new normal". I don't fight it as much , as I have in the past. I have been in  withdrawal before and not realised it . I  thought it was the "depression " recurring. I just feel at the moment like this is my journey for whatever reason and I'm trying to go with the flow.  At least now I know what it is and that is a big relief, in a way. That sounds strange but it feels like the whole "chemical imbalance / major depressive disorder, that I thought I had has just gone up in a puff of smoke because it didn't exist. That feels like a burden has been lifted so that when all these symptoms  of withdrawal  settle down with time I'll be able to go on with no illusions and even if I'm never exactly the same as I was I will accept that. At least whoever I am will be me and not the drugs.  I'll keep an eye on the magnesium.

Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014

 

                                                  Psych Drug - free since May 2014
.
         

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Just to give my view to this, I'm not the same person I was, I'm better.  Not because of the drugs but because I have learnt about myself, have grown more informed, have worked out how to be gentle with myself, have developed an understanding that ups and downs are normal in life and decided to work through my past.

 

I am doing things I never thought I would do and feel much less vulnerable doing them.

 

I loathe these drugs and their effects but it is possible to fashion growth and positive change out of the experience, it doesn't all have to be about the damage.

 

D xx

Please note - I am not a medical practitioner and I do not give medical advice. I offer an opinion based on my own experiences, reading and discussion with others.On Effexor for 2 months at the start of 2005. Had extreme insomnia as an adverse reaction. Changed to mirtazapine. Have been trying to get off since mid 2008 with numerous failures including CTs and slow (but not slow enough tapers)Have slow tapered at 10 per cent or less for years. I have liquid mirtazapine made at a compounding chemist.

Was on 1.6 ml as at 19 March 2014.

Dropped to 1.5 ml 7 June 2014. Dropped to 1.4 in about September.

Dropped to 1.3 on 20 December 2014. Dropped to 1.2 in mid Jan 2015.

Dropped to 1 ml in late Feb 2015. I think my old medication had run out of puff so I tried 1ml when I got the new stuff and it seems to be going ok. Sleep has been good over the last week (as of 13/3/15).

Dropped to 1/2 ml 14/11/15 Fatigue still there as are memory and cognition problems. Sleep is patchy but liveable compared to what it has been in the past.

 

DRUG FREE - as at 1st May 2017

 

>My intro post is here - http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/2250-dalsaan

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Dalsaan, Prestorb, Ali: I enjoyed reading this wonderfully positive conversation, with good ideas for everyone.

2009: Cancer hospital said I had adjustment disorder because I thought they were doing it wrong. Their headshrinker prescribed Effexor, and my life set on a new course. I didn't know what was ahead, like a passenger on Disneyland's Matterhorn, smiling and waving as it climbs...clink, clink, clink.

2010: Post surgical accidental Effexor discontinuation by nurses, masked by intravenous Dilaudid. (The car is balanced at the top of the track.) I get home, pop a Vicodin, and ...

Whooosh...down, down, down, down, down...goes the trajectory of my life, up goes my mood and tendency to think everything is a good idea.
2012: After the bipolar jig was up, now a walking bag of unrelated symptoms, I went crazy on Daytrana (the Ritalin skin patch by Noven), because ADHD was a perfect fit for a bag of unrelated symptoms. I was prescribed Effexor for the nervousness of it, and things got neurological. An EEG showed enough activity to warrant an epilepsy diagnosis rather than non-epileptic ("psychogenic") seizures.

:o 2013-2014: Quit everything and got worse. I probably went through DAWS: dopamine agonist withdrawal syndrome. I drank to not feel, but I felt a lot: dread, fear, regret, grief: an utter sense of total loss of everything worth breathing about, for almost two years.

I was not suicidal but I wanted to be dead, at least dead to the experience of my own brain and body.

2015: I  began to recover after adding virgin coconut oil and organic grass-fed fed butter to a cup of instant coffee in the morning.

I did it hoping for mental acuity and better memory. After ten days of that, I was much better, mood-wise. Approximately neutral.

And, I experienced drowsiness. I could sleep. Not exactly happy, I did 30 days on Wellbutrin, because it had done me no harm in the past. 

I don't have the DAWS mood or state of mind. It never feel like doing anything if it means standing up.

In fact, I don't especially like moving. I'm a brain with a beanbag body.   :unsure:

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Thanks Westcoast. This has been a lifeline for me as I'm sure it is for others. Encouragement and support is vital in this  battle we are all engaged in.  Dalsaan, that is such a good way of looking at it. I suppose I have been grieving for the person I was, but maybe if I can put it in that context, I can see things in a different light.  I know I'm certainly stronger, more patient and empathetic . I'm a survivor not only with the drugs but childhood issues and family dysfunction.  I'm going to take a leaf out of your book. Thank you for the new perspective.

Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014

 

                                                  Psych Drug - free since May 2014
.
         

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Thanks for stopping by my thread, AliG. Hope you're hanging in there.

Zoloft 100 mg. daily for Chronic Fatigue Syndrome since Oct. 1994 / Synthroid 88 mcg. daily / Supplements: Neptune Krill Oil-1,000 mg. twice daily/Astaxanthin 10 mg. twice daily/Ubiquinol 100 mg. twice daily (These 3 have allowed me to discontinue (approved by doctor) bp meds I was on. Calcium Citrate 500 mg. daily/Vitamin D3 2,400 iu daily/K2 (MK7) 100 mcg daily (osteopenia and fam. hist. of severe osteoporosis). Stress B Complex (1/2 dose)/Quercetin (for allergies/asthma)/Magnesium (400 mg. oral glycinate and about 50 mg. magnesium chloride spray oil a day, divided throughout day).

Tapered Zoloft about 6 wks. Totally off since the end of July (25-29, 2014). 3 wks. vertigo at end of taper, then 3-4 wks. OK, followed by withdrawal symptoms increasing in severity (nausea, gastric disturbances, loss of appetite, insomnia, restlessness, jitters, anxiety, agitation--jumping out of my skin--possible akathisia?) Seem to have paradoxical reactions to everything new, even Vitamin C. Severity of akathisia comes and goes, but is constant to some degree. Hard to leave house, and cannot be home alone. (Retired)

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Thanks luv2 knit. You've been through the wringer, so to speak.   I hope things get better for you soon. There seems to be no rhyme or reason, to this drug poisoning that we have all gone through.  

Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014

 

                                                  Psych Drug - free since May 2014
.
         

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Thanks, Ali. There are others who have it worse. It's starting to get to me, though :(

Zoloft 100 mg. daily for Chronic Fatigue Syndrome since Oct. 1994 / Synthroid 88 mcg. daily / Supplements: Neptune Krill Oil-1,000 mg. twice daily/Astaxanthin 10 mg. twice daily/Ubiquinol 100 mg. twice daily (These 3 have allowed me to discontinue (approved by doctor) bp meds I was on. Calcium Citrate 500 mg. daily/Vitamin D3 2,400 iu daily/K2 (MK7) 100 mcg daily (osteopenia and fam. hist. of severe osteoporosis). Stress B Complex (1/2 dose)/Quercetin (for allergies/asthma)/Magnesium (400 mg. oral glycinate and about 50 mg. magnesium chloride spray oil a day, divided throughout day).

Tapered Zoloft about 6 wks. Totally off since the end of July (25-29, 2014). 3 wks. vertigo at end of taper, then 3-4 wks. OK, followed by withdrawal symptoms increasing in severity (nausea, gastric disturbances, loss of appetite, insomnia, restlessness, jitters, anxiety, agitation--jumping out of my skin--possible akathisia?) Seem to have paradoxical reactions to everything new, even Vitamin C. Severity of akathisia comes and goes, but is constant to some degree. Hard to leave house, and cannot be home alone. (Retired)

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Hi Ali, thank you for stopping by my thread I hope you doing well.

Spring of 1998 place on birth control pills for irregular bleeding, high testosterone and one ovarian cyst, stayed on until April 2004, told to take hormone holiday, conceived first son 4 months later-VERY BIG SUPRISE, was told wouldn't be able to have childern or would need reproductive doctor to help. Got pregnant again 2006 with second son easily, then was on/off birthcontrol again until October 2011, concieved 3rd son in October 2011(tried many times to get pregant again when 2nd child was close to 2yrs, hormone problems started again after 2nd child, along with thyroid enlargement.

 

Spring of 2001 celexa 10 mgs-rx'd by pcp for complaints of chronic fatigue, irritability and weight gain, stayed on until June 2005, switched to Lexapro 20mgs for PPD, stayed on Lexapro 6-7 months, couldn't afford to see psyh dr. and Lexapro, saw PCP switched back to 20mgs celexa in 2007, remained on until November 2011, was c/t off due to 3rd pregnancy, baby had umbilical cord defect, seemed ok during pregnancy, except for crying jags here and there. Our miracle baby was born July 20th 2012, healthy except with reflux. One month later the anxiety,restlessness,horrible crying, insomnia and the deepest depression ever. That started the psyh drug nightmare-benzo's,antidepressants, sleeping pills, mood stablizers. Nothing help made me worse, doctors just kept changing the meds frequently. 4 mental health hospitalizations, rapid detox off benzos Jan 2013, horrible withdrawal and still suffering withdrawal symptoms NO ONE BELIEVES ME, I feel like ive been on one consistant drug withdrawal for the past 2 years

January 2014 slow titrate up of lexapro to 20 mgs-horrible side effects!!, was just rapidly taper by current pysh off to pursade me to try an MAOI-no way!!! Was told should consider ECT

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