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@Jaffa Understand what you mean. But I think you did the right thing. May not be worth the risk. Yes, I feel I did the wrong thing going zero. Different level. Didn't know about the delayed effect. It's true, you can get horrible WD even if you go slowly. I’m also worried about becoming diabled. Thought about treatment resistant depression too. And Tardive dystonia. Can you really get enough of your own serotonin back after many years and fast taper… You’re lucky to have the beaches. I’m from Norway. Relatives in the U.S. so I've been there a lot. Never been to Australia. Hoping for beaches and flip flops again one day… 🏖️ 🙏

Hello everyone! Wow...I can't believe it's been almost 2 years since I posted. I know people often search the forums for information, so I didn't want to just leave this abandoned. I took some time off of tapering because I was dealing with some other health issues and just decided that since I was stable I would finish the taper once I felt up to it. Well, I've been up to it this year. I'm currently completely off the Prozac and down to 15mg of Cymbalta. Things are going well! I will probably make another update once I am off or if I feel that anything of note occurs until then. Cheers!

I think I got to the core of my issues, deep down behind my Sertraline chemical deception and its crazy-making withdrawal, the trauma of my psychiatric criminal and inhumane intervention and the psychiatric indoctrination and brainwashing into its insane sanism, and of course that very traumatizing narcissistic relationship. I was in crisis when my psychiatric intervention happened, but I wasn't insane, I had legitimate objectives and human needs that I desperately needed to met, and I gave everything I had trying to do so and be "moral", "normal", even at the hospital, until exhaustion, until I was too morally hurt to keep searching for the moral support I needed to feel a worthy, valid person and become fully "functional" and productive, overcoming my tyrannical postraumatic moral identity, the cause of my psychosocial "dysfunctionality". I had very intense postraumatic reactions and overwhelming postraumatic and moral feelings and emotions when I was 19-20, I isolated myself to control them and calm down reprocessing my trauma, avoiding my external triggers to do so, but my moral identity/superego was too powerful and hijacked me, my mind and my life, my family also made me feel even more guilty and ashamed, immoral, for destabilizing it with my behaviors, and I got sucked into a moral loop, unable to escape it. Then the psychiatric intervention happened, it was my last hope, I thought and felt that I could receive the external emotional validation and moral support that I desperately needed to overcome my postraumatic and moral crisis there if I told my story the right way, that is, that they could make me feel moral and normal if I acted perfectly normal and moral and told my story in a way that made sense. But I was sentenced and deemed as insane by the moment I entered that psychiatric ward. Then I started disconnecting psychologically because of the psychiatric trauma and chemically because of Sertraline, and I forgot everything, my legitimate objectives, true human needs and real life problems, completely tricked by this malignant psychiatric drug. 8 years ago I was desperately trying to feel moral, normal, valid, worthy and safe, to overcome my post-traumatic and tyrannical moral identity, to prove it wrong, but psychiatry gave it even more power by criminalizing me instead of understanding me and helping me overcome it, so without moral support and loosing all the understanding I had over my issues, forgetting everything, taking Sertraline or other psychiatric drugs was the only way I had to control my moral and postraumatic feelings, emotions and reactions and be "functional", specially when I became addicted to Sertraline and unaware of it.

@ArielAriel I am SO GLAD to see you back on here. How are you doing? I have missed you!

I found it, if anyone is interested. The article is in french. https://ici.radio-canada.ca/info/long-format/2050737/antidepresseur-sevrage-arret-medicament-medecin It's a great article. Well researched in my opinion. It's infuriating how Dr Pierre Bleau, Dr Benoit Mulsant and Dre Daphné Rocha Marussi are completely dismissive. For them, we don't exist. I wonder how many of their patients just "relapse" for no reasons?

It's great you can get sun. I'm so sorry you're in such pain. I can't imagine it. Are you able to exercise to the point where you'd get some endorphins? They're the body's own painkillers. But if you're very reactive these days more intense exercise than you're used to might destabilise you, for all I know, so the key is to ease into it. If you haven't already, I'd ask for a referral to a pain clinic and also read up on pain. A few years ago I had nagging, minor chronic pain -- nothing as bad as yours -- and I was looking forward to a possible surgery with a particularly long and painful recovery. Here are the links I started collecting in case I needed them. Pain clinic useful resources https://www.nbt.nhs.uk/our-services/a-z-services/pain-clinic-services/pain-clinic-useful-resources Living with chronic pain https://www.uhbristol.nhs.uk/patients-and-visitors/your-hospitals/other-services-in-bristol/pain-clinic/what-is-pain/living-with-chronic-pain/ Rethinking What Causes Pain: Psychological Treatment Shown To Yield Strong, Lasting Pain Relief https://scitechdaily.com/rethinking-what-causes-pain-psychological-treatment-shown-to-yield-strong-lasting-pain-relief/ Perceived choice in music listening is linked to pain relief https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2022/08/220803141240.htm Nostalgia relieves pain https://scitechdaily.com/nostalgia-can-relieve-pain-viewing-images-from-childhood-reduces-pain-perception/ An Update on Cognitive Therapy for the Management of Chronic Pain: a Comprehensive Review https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/31292747 Much of the above is about psychological approaches to managing pain. That's not to say the pain isn't real, but we feel pain more intensely when we're psychologically or physically distressed. But when we turn down the sympathetic nervous system (fight or flight system) we reduce pain intensity. That's not as easy as taking a pill but it helps and it's safe.

@Tom2020 Yes I walk a lot so no reason I wouldn't get sun exposure

You don't need to thank me, friend. 🥰 I am happy to support you in any way that I can. You are NOT alone. If I can suggest a few YouTube videos.. Baylissa is amazing and so incredibly knowledgeable. Her videos are calming. Angie Peacock is a badass survivor as well and has great videos. I also love Michael Priebe of the Lovely Grind. You've got this @Dahlia50!!!!! Look at how many days you've gotten through. You are doing amazing! Reach out anytime.

@EdaB Hi there, friend. I am so sorry that you are having a difficult time tapering the Ativan. I did not taper Ativan. I was cold turkeyed by a Psychiatrist. If you go back and read my intro bio, you will read that I am still on Klonopin. I will be tapering that drug last. I am not in a position to help guide you through the tapering process but the mods on this site are. I have no idea which mod @KenA but I am sure Ken could help you find one that can help guide you safely. I am here if you ever need support as are A LOT of other beautiful souls on this site. Remember, this is temporary. You WILL heal. EVERYONE heals. I will be praying for you.

800IU isn't even that much. Thanks for the extra details. It's useful to document these things in case other people have a similar situation. Are you able to get enough sun in the summer?

Do you have a link? I'm interested! Even if it's it's in french... Thank you!

Thanks everyone for your reply. I have already published my paper on radio-canada.ca at the end of February. So I am not looking anymore. Good luck to all of you in your attempt to withdraw antidepressants. Julie

Here is my update after being off of Mirtazapine for 4 months. I continue to feel solid post taper and I am grateful. * My frozen shoulder is better and I'm getting more range of motion. About 75% healed. * Still sleeping between 5-8 hours a night, though it's hard to drop off most nights. I continue to take Magnesium Glycinate to relax me and sometimes L-theanine. * My mood remains good. Remaining Symptoms * Had a cold for the first time in years. Recovering. * Still feel some fatigue but am walking more. Plan to rejoin my gym in a few weeks. * Might have lost a little med weight but stil out of shape. * Have a low grade hissing/tinnitus in my ears that I hope will fade. Had it with benzo withdrawal too. Overall I feel positive about my post withdrawal recovery. Will post more updates next month. Hibari

@Tom2020 No different types each time. First one was 800iu daily from doctor prescription. This time was 400iu from a supplement. There were no added ingredients either. It just seems a bit to uncanny to me. But I dunno anymore

If you read through this thread, you may find some in your city to reach out to, etc

I think stress definitely predisposes us to bad reactions but even so that's a remarkably strong reaction to vitamin D. Given it happened both times I doubt it was a coincidence. Did you take the same brand and dose of vitamin both times? If you're only a little deficient in D it's not something to worry about.

@Deano32 Hi, just wanted to say I can relate to how hard this is. Also do not understand how it’s possible these drugs can cause all these inhumane symptoms. Hope we heal and get some relief 🌿

That's my story. I am still in the middle of it. I reinstated too high at 5 mg but then tried 10 mg and that was a disaster so after 3 days I went back to 5 mg. I had been off the drug completely for 3 months. I was suicidal and suffering from dp/dr, no joy, no emotion. The reinstatement helped with the big issues. Stabilizing took at least 6 months. My system is very sensitive and tapering is a slow crawl. I do not think it would be wise to add any drug to your sensitized CNS. You will heal. It will be a long journey. But adding a drug will probably make it worse and lengthen the healing process. Neither of our situations are ideal. Gratitude and being positive go a long way to helping direct your precious energy into healing. I too couldn't smile or laugh. It is still a struggle when I am in a wave. I read somewhere when you see your reflection force a smile. So I did and it helped. I honestly think we have to retrain ourselves to do it. I couldn't read, watch tv, converse but it has improved immensely. I have to be very selective in what I watch or read. It is a matter of carving out a life with the things you can do and not concerning yourself with the things you can't do at this time. Eventually we will heal completely. Kindness and acceptance will aid that. Honestly I wish I could have made it through without reinstatement but I am here now and that's okay too. You're got this. Others' examples have shown us that we will survive and thrive.

@Sonia009 Yes it is, terrible. Hug to you.

@Tom2020 I was in a stressful job which we thought was the cause but i had been doing it a little while. It just seems odd 2015 I was fine took vit d 4 days later bam antidepressant and propranalol prescribed. Took vit d this time few days later all the symptoms I had last time Could be a coincidence

@LotusRising Yes definitely i was totally fine after ct in 2021 .not even single withdrawal.

What was your health like before you took the vitamin D in 2015? Could anything else (drugs, supplements, stress, illness...) in the months before have contributed to your reaction?

Today I've had a horrible migraine type headache, probably brought on by crying and stressing too much. I nursed my husband through his TIA, spent sleepless nights with him, went through his mental health issues, but now the tables have turned somewhat I get no empathy from him, just "you've got to make more of an effort" reaction. He is going through withdrawal too but won't even accept it. I realise that I must get well again so that I can reconfigure my future. Sorry to rant but I have no one else to talk to and I just wanted to make the point of how cruel and devastating this whole withdrawal process is and how these drugs ruin lives.

You there? How are things today?

@LotusRising I have one question how can i stable on paxil when my aka had started after few pills?? Thank you so much .i really need your all help