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  2. Hooray! So glad to hear about the window and also your proactive steps on getting the FMLA stuff sorted out. HMOs can be a pain to deal with, in terms of getting the proper specialists and appts. My mom made a point to set up her medicare as PPO so she could pick and choose her doctors. And I tell people, if you have the means, get a concierge doctor! But not everyone has the means, of course. Don’t worry about what your healthcare system thinks or how others perceive you, get the care that you need!
  3. Made the reduction to 8.0 mg this week after 3 weeks on 8.25 mg. Experiencing my usual uptick in sweating, head symptoms, sleep issues. If things continue as usual it will level out within the week. Mostly posting on here to rant a tiny bit: I’m trying to arrange for some simple accommodations for school related to my WDnormal issues. My school set me up with an appointment with a psychologist per their protocol. In my visit I basically explained everything that I’ve gone through and provided lots of resources (scientific papers on withdrawal). I know she’s doing her best to understand and she probably mostly evaluates people for cognitive/learning disabilities or anxiety/depression. Still, it’s hard when my lived experience butts up against the “textbook” medical model for these things. She’s aware of withdrawal but had to confirm with me several times that I had zero history of anxiety or depression prior to this. As if that is a predictor of whether or not you will go through withdrawal. Nope. Perhaps there are genetic/metabolism predictors of these things but prior history or lack thereof is just not relevant. There are also several questionnaires I filled out that seem to be screeners for anxiety/depression but oddly enough do capture lots of symptoms experienced in withdrawal: sweating, heart pounding, restlessness, lack of appetite, derealization. I accept that some people with severe anxiety do go through these things, but gosh, are they ever so pronounced in an incapacitating way due to these drugs/withdrawal. It’s hard to truly convey the magnitude of what happens to us. I have to remain grateful for the professionals that do their best to understand and wrap their heads around it. It’s just a taxing process having to do the educating—which is not limited to ADWD but can be true for so many chronic conditions that doctors/professionals just have little reference for. I feel a strong conviction to do more about this issue in the real world and with my studies. It has simply colored my world and how I perceive the whole arena of “mental health.”
  4. Today
  5. HopeforHealing

    HopeforHealing - Seeking Reinstatement Advice

    Hi @Cooper1968, Thank you so much for your encouraging message! Yes, the tingling/numbness when my arms are crossed is a strange symptom! I came across one other member who mentioned that symptom as well, but I unfortunately can't remember who it was. So glad to hear that you are back at work and loving it after all you've been through. I am holding onto hope that there is a fulfilling life on the other side of this withdrawal.
  6. HopeforHealing

    HopeforHealing - Seeking Reinstatement Advice

    Hi @PoetJester, Thank you so much for referring me to Bellatrix's thread! She was 8 months out from her last dose as I am. It is very encouraging that she had a successful reinstatement with microdosing - and man, did she start with tiny doses! I'd love to know how she's doing now. Do you know of any others who had similar success with reinstatement more than 3 months out? You've had quite the journey! How are you doing now?
  7. Thanks for clarifying what is meant by "a success story", Altostrata. I think I will eventually get to the point when I can present one. In answer to your question, I have been taking 10 mg of Amitriptyline each night just prior to going to bed for about two to three months. (I can find out the exact date I started from my diary if you want me to.) I got up to 20mg for around two weeks but the flatulence which came with that dose led me to cut it back to 10 mg. I saw the GP this morning and we agreed I would reduce it to 5 mg from tonight. He said it should be relatively easy to get off compared to Zopiclone. He even went as far as to say I could stop taking it altogether. He left it up to me. It is a very low dose and I haven't been on it for long either. He told me about one of his patients who is in the process of being switched by a psychiatrist from one antidepressant to Amitriptyline and is going to start the drug at 200 mg. This gives me some context in regards to the dose I am taking. All being well, I will be off the Amitripyline fairly soon. My sleep is still not that good. I am waking early each morning but sometimes like today very early with the result that I feel deprived of sleep. I guess it will take time for my sleep pattern to be fully restored. Regards, Evertonfan. PS The GP is aware that I have been posting on this site. He asked me to find out why people on this site are being given psychiatric drugs. I told him that I suspected that many people are put on psychiatric drugs when the situation they face does not really require drugs. I also told him that I have looked at many members' signatures and have noted that a lot of them are on a range of psychiatric drugs. This doesn't surprise me at all. My own experience of psychiatry - which now is extensive - indicates that psychiatrists are more likely to add more drugs into the mix rather than wind down their patients' drugs. If you have a few minutes to comment, I would appreciate it. He manages the practice and he consults with the other doctors. He is aware of the extent of prescribing by psychiatrists and is sometimes left to deal with the consequences.
  8. @Markolo1980 the head pressure has completely dropped off for me now that I drastically lowered my tapering speed. Thank goodness, that symptom felt like brain damage more than any other. I’m sorry you’re still experiencing symptoms after hitting 20 mg. It took me about 7 months to stabilize at 20 mg after my big drops and rapid reduction of lamictal. I’ll check out your page now.
  9. @Altostrata I reduced one percent since that day and my symptoms actually seem slightly better. I’ve been applying to part time work. Here’s my symptom pattern for today and yesterday, as they are the same. 11:15 am - wake up to some fatigue and irritability 11:15 - 3:30 main symptom is agitation and a kind of tightness in me (this has been present for quite some time) it dropped off for a couple days after I dropped the one percent and then came back again. It almost feels like pre-akathisia. It’s the main symptom that i experience. 4:30 pm to present - more of the same, don’t feel terrible but also don’t feel good. Agitated/annoyed etc. @Altostrata I think I slightly kindled myself after my updose and this is all still the remnants of that. I think the only real thing to do is to slowly continue my taper, dropping one or two percent when I can, and observing improvements in my overall symptom pattern. I must say, I’m pleasantly surprised that the one percent drop didn’t totally throw me off, fingers crossed. Let me know if you think my appraisal of my situation is basically on the right track. thanks for dropping in.
  10. Kornyboyo1917

    Kornyboyo1917 Remeron 15mg

    I've also developed pretty painful brain pressure/squeezing since I started remeron. Usually starts toward nighttime. I can't take any supplements especially magnesium in benzo withdrawal. I'll update my signature.
  11. NicoleL

    NicoleL: Tapering too quickly

    Hello! Quick update and question: I have weaned down to what I THINK is about 1mg of Lexapro per day, or at least it’s the smallest I could actually cut a 10mg pill with a pill cutter I bought on Amazon. I’ve been on this dose for about 10 days and doing okay. My question is, how do I taper from here? I can’t physically cut the pill any smaller ... Not sure what to do next. Every other day?
  12. Altostrata

    Kornyboyo1917 Remeron 15mg

    You have post-acute benzo withdrawal syndrome. I don't know if taking an antidepressant is going to help, that's something we've never recommended. Perhaps @Shep has some suggestions. Have you tried fish oil and magnesium supplements? A lot of people find them helpful, see https://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/36-king-of-supplements-omega-3-fatty-acids-fish-oil/ https://survivingantidepressants.org/topic/15483-magnesium-natures-calcium-channel-blocker/ Try a little bit of one at a time to see how it affects you. To help us out, follow these instructions Please put your drug and withdrawal history in your signature You may need to use a computer to do this.
  13. Let's start conservatively and see how it does after 6 weeks (the 4 week taper and the 2 week BM taper hold). If all is well, you can increase to the regular 10%/4 week taper and if that goes well, faster. Wellbutrin uniquely seems seem allow for a faster taper, so let's take it a step at a time. Certainly your side effects argue for a more rapid taper if you can tolerate it.
  14. Cloudskishawna

    Cloudskishawna: 5 weeks on Remeron / mirtazapine

    Yes I'm going to start doing some stretches when I going through these jerks I was listening to this nice relaxing music it made me calm so I might use it again
  15. I noticed the day 14 difficulties more when I was tapering 10% rather than 5%. 21 days is also aspirational - there’s often travel or something that keeps me on the previous dose by an extra week. I was planning to reduce percentage drops over holidays given that it’s a tough time of year. I spoke to a neurobiologist friend who explained that there’s an immediate effect of the reduction, a medium term effect and a long term effect. So I figured the 14 days relates to the medium reduction. It’s so hard to wrap my head around how long it will take to get off these meds.
  16. Rosabell

    Rosabell : Two months off of Effexor

    Sounds good, I’ll start it up with dinner this evening. Hopefully it works fairly quickly and I don’t get any of the start up symptoms that I get when I first started!! i can put up with some short term yuckiness if it will in any way provide longer term relief! in all reality, I do feel like I am just being a big complainer, but any time I start to get the least bit “nervy” it starts to spiral to all our panic, I think I am more worried about being anxious than anything and it just makes it worse!
  17. Altostrata

    SlaughterOfinnocents intro. Coping with emotional anhedonia

    Welcome, Slaughter. What drug or drugs are you talking about? This is a site for going off drugs, how can we help you?
  18. Kornyboyo1917

    Kornyboyo1917 Remeron 15mg

    My mind is just torturing me 24/7 about the remeron. It only helps with the pacing and terror. But all the other mental symptoms are still there. I noticed the looping start a week or so ago but it was only briefly. Today I listened to a song and one part of the song has been playing in my head all day. I have other kinds of earworms as well. Anything I read/watch/hear and conversations play in my head constantly. Have you heard of this symptom before Altostrata? Would it be better to switch to an SSRI like Luvox if I'm going to be on antidepressant. At least one that is designed for OCD. Even though i never had OCD before the benzos.
  19. I'm concerned that it takes 14 days for your nervous system to settle down after a reduction. Perhaps you could reduce every 4 weeks rather than 3? This allows your system a couple of weeks rest and recuperation.
  20. Altostrata

    Cloudskishawna: 5 weeks on Remeron / mirtazapine

    Acupuncture, massage, and exercise can help with leg twitches. Do you spend a lot of time sitting at the computer? Hypnic jerks are a relatively mild symptom
  21. .95 of the previous dose, by bead. Previous dose 103 beads, current dose 98. Averaged three capsules to start, and I count them out, I don’t just remove beads. I put the beads back in original or new capsules. re Ativan - in the last two weeks, maybe two? In the past week, one. I take less than I used to, and never took more than 3-4 in a week, even when my life was falling apart. Some weeks zero. Also it’s .5 not 5, but you probably guessed that. thanks.
  22. Very good letters. I hope the doctors learn something from them. Everton, I would like to celebrate your recovery, but our success stories are from people who definitely have come out on the other side of withdrawal and have felt recovered for months. Instead, I'd like to celebrate your progress in minimizing your drugs, your improvement, and toast to its continuation. We look forward to your success story! What drugs are you taking now, at what times of day, and what dosages?
  23. Yesterday
  24. Thanks everyone.. İ think I will get my brain checked. Does anyone know should I get mri ör smth else?
  25. Altostrata

    Gemma92: severely kindled

    Does this occur before or after you take mirtazapine?
  26. This is a terrible idea. Be forewarned. Do not cold turkey any of your drugs. We're not going to hold your hand through self-induced withdrawal insomnia. Did you do this yesterday? Also a terrible idea. Please note: We advise changing only one drug at a time and definitely DO NOT COLD TURKEY absent a life-threatening adverse drug reaction. If you are an impulsive person who cannot manage a taper, we cannot support you -- you'll be making your own problems.
  27. AuntieBea

    AuntieBea: tapering Celexa and Wellbutrin

    @Gridley Hello again, I’ve posted yesterday’s and today’s daily notes...there has been some noticeable symptom relief from spacing out the Wellbutrin and Celexa doses. I’ll give it a few more days to settle in. The Brassmonkey Slide does seem like a good middle of the road place to start the taper, but the push-pull that you mention related to my vision problem has me wishing I could step it up faster. Best to start conservatively though.
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