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  2. RichT

    mbanks: Abilify liquid 9mL taper

    Now on 0.5mg/day. I was originally on 5mg/day. I felt ok (bearable withdrawal symptoms) for about 2 months, then I started to feel anxiety, depersonalisation, insomnia, agitation. I haven’t felt the symptoms you have, but we are all different.
  3. Hi I'm Federico from Italy and I will be 30 in August. I have an history of depression and social anxiety. I talked to a psychiatrist and he put me on zoloft, lorazepam and olanzapine around 6 years ago. At the "worst" of my therapy I was on 50 ( or 100 mg sorry I don't remember) of zoloft, 3.5 mg of lorazepam and 5 mg of olanzapine daily. I was on zoloft for around a year but decided to quit, but I stayed on lorazepam and olanzapine for 5 years until recently. I managed to wean off the lorazepam during the years and now I'm free of it since around a year. Got worsened anxiety when quitting the lorazepam but other than that I managed to quit fine. The last drug my psychiatrist wanted to remove was the olanzapine. Keep in mind I took the drug at 5mg for 5 or 6 years daily. He decided to reduce the dosage so he put me at 2.5mg, when I reduced the dosage I was hit with insomnia for around a week or so but fortunately managed to sleep well after that. Everything was fine. Then he wanted me to be off of olanzapine completely. So he instructed me to take half a pill of 2.5mg for 10 days and then to quit taking the half a pill entirely. When I was at the half a pill I was sleeping fine. Since 15 of April I'm completely off of olanzapine and I'm experiencing terrible insomnia, the first two days couldn't sleep at all and now I have troubles falling asleep but manage to sleep three hours a day ( I believe, I might be sleeping more, not sure). Also I don't know if it is because of the drug withdrawal but I was hit with a terrible itch all over my body ( legs, knees, behind my neck, hair, arm, hands, etc), the itch was so bad and I was so frustrated for not sleeping I had to take some drops of delorazepam to calm down and managed to sleep ( this happened only at the third day, only time I used benzos since quitting them). Yesterday I decided to call my psychiatrist to have advices for sleeping better, in my mind I expected some supplement or whatever, but no he told me "to start taking olanzapine again immediately". I also told him about the itch all over my body and he told me it's not because of the drug since " you didn't have it when you were on it", but I wondered if it is because of the withdrawal not because of the drug but didn't ask him. I suggested to give some more time to see if things improve and I will contact him again otherwise. To be honest, I don't want to be back on olanzapine. In terms of mental wealth I'm feeling fine, I don't know if it's placebo, but seems like a fog has been lifted, I have more energy and I don't feel depressed, almost positive. Sure I'm not feeling too well phisically because I feel tired and a little "confused" especially today. Yesterday I had a car accident but fortunately nobody was harmed only the cars. I know this sound crazy, but I feel not too well phisically but good mentally, I believe that's a great thing for myself being out of the drugs. I hated being on them for all these years. Do you have advices for improving the insomnia? I'm taking magnesium, drops of somekind of natural supplement ( valerian and melatonin) and some infusion of natural herbs to help sleep. How long do you feel it will take to get better? ps sorry for my bad english. edit: just noticed I might have posted this in the wrong section, feel free to move the discussion in the correct forum.
  4. Tough day - so tired, legs like concrete and aching, seeing years ahead of this sh*t again. Worked from home and had some good input into a phone meeting - felt I'd be able to handle the workload for a while yet. But so exhausted. At least anxiety and the hungers and wees were low. I am going to have a go at going to the office on Monday - I have to show my face sometime - and have worked out that the neighbour is happy to drop me at the rail station in the morning, then I can get a taxi at the other end to work, see how long I can manage in the office, then either wobble my way back to the station or get a taxi again and the neighbour has said he will pick me up from the station up here as well. I feel nervous about it. I know my legs are not as able as they were but I won't know how less able until I have a go at being in the office. I'm holding on all drugs at the moment - going to see how it goes in the next month - think I may have been experiencing quite hefty WD from the benzo taper. Won't know if things are helped by holding for a few weeks. Weight increasing - lack of exercise I guess and maybe induced by the drugs a bit. Yuck. So, what are the things to be grateful for?: Managed to change my bed linen (two months since the last change) and turn the mattress Supportive messages from SA friends An understanding manager Enough mental capacity to advise colleagues at work Being able to rest after working The sun warming the house in the afternoon Watching a monarch caterpillar eat its way through the swan plant leaves
  5. Today
  6. @AltostrataI really understand there is no definite answers. Its a gamble.. I will let you know what I decide to do. Thank you again for you relentless work in helping us all
  7. Hello Rosetta Sorry to hear you are feeling so awful: You always have a way of saying and writing so beautifully responses to other people to give them a pick me up, so I'm quoting back to you something you wrote on my thread not long ago and it was such a comfort to me: "While I am in a wave I can't see any reality outside of the one I am experiencing at that moment. I can't remember or believe that I will get better. Once the wave lets up I can. Otherwise, I'm just distracting myself from my reality in order to get through. I need someone to say to me: You will get better. You will get better. You have before; you will again." You will get better. You will get better. You have before; you will again. Things do change and tomorrow could be a whole lot different. Warm wishes - we're hanging in with you Neroli 💜
  8. I'm very sorry I can't be more definite about what you should do. I can't predict what will work, you'll have to feel your way along. That's what everybody does here.
  9. mbanks

    mbanks: Abilify liquid 9mL taper

    Whats ur dose? Can you remember when you were off the drugs, did you feel at peace for many months and then all of a sudden start to feel brain zaps, depression and overheating after about 3-4 months? That’s how I felt
  10. Have a great time, Carmie! (I'm up late tonight over in the other hemisphere.)
  11. Definitely @puthappinessfirst @intothewoods I’ve got so many other artists that I would love at a recovery party too: One Republic, Ben Howard, John Farnham, Bastille, Muse (minus the couple of songs that have swearing in them), Pete Murray, Icehouse, Lee Kernaghan, Lifehouse, Snow Patrol etc etc etc etc etc etc etc. I think our recovery musical party would go on for a month with all the musicians I like. I’ve been so anhedonic lately, but I’m actually feeling excited about the show at the Queensland Petforming Arts Centre tonight. Belinda Davids is amazing at singing Whitney Houston songs! I loved her show sooo much last time that I had to see her again. I’m getting picked up soon. We’re going to a Thai restaurant first. I had red Thai curry for lunch, which I made, so I’m getting a double whammy of Thai food today. Yummy! Hope you’re both coping as best you can. One day this dreaded withdrawal journey will end. Sending hugs to you both🤗🤗
  12. mbanks

    mbanks: Abilify liquid 9mL taper

    On box it says 1mg of Abilify in 1ml. Why? Is this significant?
  13. @Altostrata thank you for all your information. . I must now choose what to do . Thank you again
  14. That sounds like waves of symptoms to me. Your symptom pattern does not sound like an adverse reaction to the Seroxat dose. Again, if you want to try a tiny updose, you'll see if that's the right direction. I don't know what else to suggest. There are only a few ways to go -- up, down, sideways. Other than that, there's crossover to Prozac to bridge off Paxil. Best to work with a doctor on that. The Prozac switch or "bridging" with Prozac Not being doctors, we can't prescribe additional drugs for you, I'm sorry.
  15. @Altostrata The akathesia type symptoms are sporadic throughout the day also accompanied with like a burning skin on lower legs. I feel the need to move but its not essential, but I do cross my legs somewhat. I have no mental issues with it like suicidal or rage or ocd. Also no involuntary movements. No skipped doses or exposure to anything. Sometimes the throb at the back of the head is linked to its initial starting. I many thanks your reply. I didn't realise the volume of people on this site needing help. I'm also not aware of how many moderators are here either, as I seem to be at your door repeatedly. Once again thank you so much.
  16. Glad you’re still doing well Hazel, Good on you for having a long hold and really allowing your body to stabilise. Let us know how you go once you start tapering again. I’m down to 7mg now. I tapered again a week ago, so far the withdrawals haven’t been too bad. Last time I tapered I had pretty bad waves in amidst the windows for about three weeks. I just take each day as it comes. No use worrying about what tomorrow will bring, or even the next hour. We have to make the best of the moment we are in. I’m going to do another three 0.25mg drops, and then I’m going to try some form of micro tapering. That’s months away though. Wishing you all the best with your continued recovery.💚
  17. Are these symptoms worse at any particular time of day? How about after you take Seroxat? Have you accidentally skipped a dose recently? Are your tablets old or have they been exposed to heat or moisture?
  18. Carmie

    ☼ direstraits: Paxil withdrawal

    Hi Direstraits, I’m sorry you’re still struggling so much. Yes, this journey really is a sad journey, there is so much suffering. I still try to look at the positives in my life though. Anhedonia has been pretty bad lately, but I continue to do things I love, even if I’m feeling numb. Neroli has started writing down what she’s grateful for, there are still many things to be grateful for despite the torture we are going through. I’m going to a show tonight at the Performing Arts Centre, which will be nice. It’s a Whitney Houston show by a South African singer, Belinda Davids. I’ve seen her before, she’s amazing. The music is such happy music. Last time my friends and I couldn’t stay seated the whole concert. We had to get up and dance.💃 The Show was down the Gold Coast, I’m not sure if we can stand up in our chairs at the Arts Centre. I’ve been to there heaps of times, but they weren’t events one would dance to, so we’ll see. Yes, definitely direstraits, here’s to better days ahead.💚
  19. I’m so sorry you’re struggling so much Rosetta, Sending lots of hugs 🤗🤗🤗
  20. Hi Cleerity, That’s really great getting your dosage down by a quarter soon. Slow and steady really is the way to go. Well done!💚
  21. Carmie

    Byc28: bilateral temple pain

    Hi Byc, So glad to hear that you’re taking 20mg daily again, instead of alternating doses. Yes, please give it at least a month, maybe longer, to stabilise. Then you can start tapering again by no more than 10% a month. I am doing under 4% myself. Wishng you all the best in your recovery.💚
  22. Hi Jozeff, Nice to hear from you. Yes, great choice holding while going through a major life event. Enjoy your new baby when he or she finally arrives. 👶🏻 Sending hugs🤗
  23. So glad you got a good night’s sleep Jackie🛌😴😴😴💚
  24. Hi Shoehorn, Everyone is different when it comes to withdrawals, and the patterns that may happen at one stage may totally change in the future too. Withdrawals are all over the place, there’s nothing linear about them whatsoever, I’ve learnt that in my case. A lot of people get delayed withdrawals too, like you, and that’s happened to me as well. Some people who haven’t felt the drop early on have decided to taper too soon because they thought they were doing fine. Off course, then they ended up having to hold a lot longer because the waves lasted a lot longer. I’ve done that in the past, thinking I’d be okay. Nope, not a good idea! I’ve learnt so much on this site since then. I’m all for holding as long as it takes now, and then a bit longer. The holds are just as important as the tapering. Thanks for your kind words, wishing you all the best with your continued taper too.💚
  25. bunchesofoats

    bunchesofoats: starting 2nd citalopram taper

    I'm learning to program and I just noticed there's no space between the word "Location" and the person's location. The code has print("Location" + userlocation) when it should have print("Location " + userlocation) Needs a space before the end quote. Or something like that, depending on what language this is in. Yay I'm learning something 😁. Maybe.
  26. bunchesofoats

    bunchesofoats: starting 2nd citalopram taper

    Day 6 - 20mg 8% taper = 18.4mg diary Yeah, today was harder. I woke up at 5am with body rushes. I almost laughed when symptoms returned, like "ahh, of course, hello." I still felt decent all morning, but the lack of sleep and the additional change to liquid in my last dose caught up to me. Been having trouble eating and today was no exception. Feeling dizzy, intestinal cramps, nausea, hot flushes (though to be fair today was a hot day). Self-loathing thoughts about how much I've lost due to this path,. Anger at others for not providing better help to those vulnerable. Anger again at myself for not doing a better job protecting myself, even though that's the entire point of my anxiety (or so it thinks). I remembered today about how in 2011ish my dr prescribed my citalopram. I was on a double dose of prilosec at the time and had been for years. He didn't think to ask about my other medications, and he didn't know these two interacted when I told him. I went to work with crazy hot flushes and chills, thinking maybe I was sick, until I saw my pupils dilating and contracting wildly in the bathroom mirror. That to me signaled serotonin and from there I realized it was the citalopram. I had SSRIs pushed on me so many times, and I didn't want to give in because it didn't seem worth the negatives (which I didn't even know the extent of at the time). I finally gave in, and now my mind just keeps repeating, "why couldn't you get it together enough to not be so broken?" My entire career/current lack there of hinged entirely on my poor mental health. Why wasn't there more support? Why didn't the help I did seek pan out? Enough feeling sorry for myself. Nothing to do now but try to make it work (hearing that in Tim Gunn's voice). But man am I scared I'll never make it work. Today was not productive. I did quite a bit more than what my bare minimum was in the past, though. Still, though, when do I get to "really start living"?
  27. Sorry I know I may seem like I am not listening, but I don’t know what to do so I unfortunately went back to doctors advice. I held for almost a year on Paxil with no improvement, I felt I needed to make a change, I know it was a risk, but I just didn’t know what to do anymore.
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