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  2. Okay then. Thanks Arte . So sorry that you got put on AD's at such a young age. I agree with Alto. I think you can expect a full recovery. Thanks for doing your signature.
  3. nick1990

    nick1990: citalopram crap

    Lol ! Thanks @brassmonkey What do do you think Tom ? Just keep holding at the current dose ? I’m really not keen on the idea of an updose. Especially considering symptoms were definitely worse this time last year, so there has been improvement, without a doubt. Moving to Melbourne is happening in 3.5 months and I don’t want to rock the boat too much for that as it will undoubtedly involve some level of stress.
  4. Superwoman

    Superwoman: Effexor taper

    1 month ago I reduced Effexor xr by 10% from 112.5mg to 101.25mg. The taper went very smoothly. The only increase in symptoms that I had was insomnia and fatigue. I believe this was most likely caused by disruption to my sleep schedule from lots of mandatory overtime. Anxiety, and heart palpitations significantly decreased since tapering. Brain zaps and headaches are maybe a little better. Unfortunately, sexual dysfunction has not improved. However, it has also not gotten any worse. What a difference from tapering the standard medical way! When I tapered the standard way I had severe dizziness, headache, brain zaps and depression by evening after taking the pill in the morning. But yet, according to my doctor opening the capsules is so dangerous. If these doctors ever stopped to listen to their patients they would see that the drugs they prescribe and the way they haphazardly take patients off of them is really what is dangerous. Today I tapered another 10% from 101.25mg to 91 mg. It was uneventful. I had brain zaps infrequently. I was lethargic feeling all day. One bout of mild anxiety while making up pills. Other than that I was okay.
  5. Hi Saturn and welcome aboard, I just approved and moved your most recent posts from KimD's topic back here. Your introduction is the best place for questions around your unique situation. KimD's topic IS a good one to refer to, but it hasn't been posted on since 2015. Please put your withdrawal history in your signature to help us out. And yes, as Gridley stated, WD can cause all kinds of weird symptoms and flucuations. Some of the AD's do seem to mess with other systems as well. I see that in your case, you had the Grave's disease before using an AD......so more of a natural occurance then, not iatrogenic, or caused by treatment. Welcome again and I can ask Alto to take a look at the post above, directed to Alto. L, P, H, and G, mmt
  6. Onmyway

    Allodynia

    I have been having strange pains recently - my skin is painful to touch. Sometimes all over and sometimes in very specific areas. The first time it happened it was severe for a day and when I woke up the next day it was gone. It came back mildly a couple of other times and then it localized in specific areas - thigh and back. It's not in Glenmullen's list of symptoms but I'm wondering if anyone else has had it. Because it comes and goes I am assuming it is WD but also worried that it might be something more sinister. Anyone else experience it?
  7. 1/25 8am awoke from weird anxiety dreams, 20mcg levothyroxine & water, ringing in ear 9am 67.5mgai sertraline, breakfast, feel very fatigued & chilled, sit next to light box and then decide to rest on bed even though it’s morning. Bloating, gas 10am .125mg klonopin, spent time on this forum, answered emails & texts (becoming more social again, that’s good) fullness in rear, tired of gut issues & wonder if they’ll sort themselves out. Feel like a muscle is constantly contracted. 11:30am stirred crockpot chili, made another batch of black bean brownies, kinda trudging through day 1pm ate light lunch 2pm walk, even jogged for 5 minutes. 3:30pm painted a little, got chilled again, decided to take an early epsom salt bath—thought a lot about withdrawal in tub. Stomachache. 7pm tried to clean all the annoying little parts of the nutribullet thingy, worried about black spots on the rubber seal 8pm looked over Breggin’s Guide to Psychiatric Drug Withdrawal, seems like sometimes he did some fast tapers, brushed Henrietta. 8:30pm a couple spoonfuls of coconut yogurt, then bed with heating pad. Try to relax butt muscles or what is going on back there. Super frustrated with bad gas, weird sensations, always feeling like I need to go, and bloating. It must be the withdrawal-parasite(?). Not a great day but still things to be grateful for.
  8. brassmonkey

    nick1990: citalopram crap

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=In7z7B87Puc
  9. nick1990

    nick1990: citalopram crap

    @Altostrata it has been 16 months since I stopped tapering. Is that not a bit risky ? Honestly, an updose had not even crossed my mind. I don’t feel the symptoms are bad enough , it’s just the current pattern of consistent symptoms that is troublesome.
  10. Now 12 days since my last (micro) dose of abilify. Read that salt can cause RLS so cutting out processed foods as much as possible.
  11. Hi altrostata I have seen some improvements still I have taken 5 mg .. but still my focus is not clear and I do have memory issues which makes me very scary . I also wanted to ask u whether taking this for Long term will cause memory loss etc as I am very much scared after reading those horrific stories in Google .. please help me thank you godsave
  12. Altostrata

    nick1990: citalopram crap

    Yes, you may be sensitive to the heat. Do you want to try updosing 0.5mg?
  13. Superwoman

    Superwoman: Effexor taper

    Tuesday January 14, 2020 11:30pm: Wake up 10.5hrs sleep, slept well but still tired, groggy 12pm: 1C coffee, breakfast, still tired, groggy 12:30pm: Probiotic 2 tsp, Effexor xr 101.25, shower 1pm: Topical Onguard, Tea Tree EO, light headed spell lasting few seconds 1 1:30pm: Still tired, brain fog 2:30-4:30pm: anxiety, more energy, more alert 4:30-6:30: ok 7:30pm: Flat mood 3 8pm: Flat mood 2 8:30pm: Flat mood 1
  14. Today
  15. Superwoman

    Superwoman: Effexor taper

    Monday January 13, 2020 12pm: Wake up 10 hrs sleep, breakfast, 1 C green tea, headache few minutes 1 12:30pm: Effexor 101.25mg, still tired 1pm: Topical vitamin d 2000IU, fatigue 1:30pm: Probiotic 2tsp., fatigue 2pm: Fatigue 2:30-4pm, flat mood 2/3, irritability, groggy 4-6:30pm: not groggy, less irritable, flat mood 2/3, little less tired 6pm: Headache lasting 1 minute 6:30pm: Dinner, ok 7pm: 1 hr flat mood 4/5 8pm: Flat mood 3 8:30pm: Flat mood 2 9pm; Mood good rest of evening, few brain zaps after eating chocolate bar 11pm: Brain zaps, 1 hr 12am: Headache moderate 12:30am: Armour Thyroid 120mg 1am: Bed, diffuse Pettigran EO, fell asleep easy
  16. It is incredibly sad what’s been done to us, @Happy2Heal. Your story is very similar to my own. I’ll admit that I about croaked when I read your comment about elavil! That was the first one I was ever on. Talk about nasty!! I think your plan to confront your therapist about her lack of outward empathy is a good one. Her response should give you a good idea of whether or not you want to continue with her as your therapist. Changing to a new therapist is a very difficult decision. We’ve put so much time, trust, pain, effort, and hope into that relationship (oh, and $$$’s). I hope she opens up to you and will understand how important empathy is.
  17. nick1990

    nick1990: citalopram crap

    Hey @Altostrata I am feeling lost right now and need some guidance. I seem to be in an almost constant wave of symptoms of some sort, with the odd day not noticing much , but really up and down through the day . Anxiety, depression, fatigue, headaches, over sleeping, dreams, sore feet, minor eye twitches, occasional shivers. These are waves that seem to have increased in frequency over the last month or so. I’m so sick and tired of it. I am doing my best to practice acceptance and mindfulness and sit with it. It’s just really making my summer very miserable . Even though symptoms aren’t that intense, they’re so consistent at the moment. It’s the hottest summer on record here and constant glaring sunshine. Could this have something to do with the increase in WD symptoms ? Or is this just part of the WD wave/window process? I was so close to feeling back to stability a couple of months ago and then this. This time 4 years ago I was on 45mg of citalopram and in WD - now after a slow, careful taper and holding for over a year I’m still struggling and at 22mg. I just need some advice on what to do please. I feel like I’m in limbo right now. Is it just a matter of waiting out the waves? My nervous system is clearly still not settled. @brassmonkey what do you think ? Thanks so much , and sorry for the whinging - I’m just hot, frustrated and stuck at home without a job and with my family who frustrate me further. Cheers Nick
  18. @Shep my hands feeling like that are not mine has not passed but it has improved. My mind seems to have vivid nightmares in a half wake state. It was like hallucinating I saw myself in my real position and then saw a cat jumping on me. I realizedthere isnt any cat and then came huge fear with huge tingling I could not move and I could not scream. I tried to scream thinking I was dying. I forced myself and edit my body falling in real slow motion. I woke up now and I have lot of paranoia with my normaldaily tinnitus.
  19. thank you @FindRest I was just reading your thread, you've been in nearly the same boat, I see. Oh I'm so sorry too, it's just awful what's been done to us. I was diagnosed as schizophrenic when I was around 20, but that was AFTER they gave me an anti- psychotic in the clinic when I was just 18, and my actual diagnosis at that time was "adjustment reaction to adolescence" (what I really had/have was/is PTSD) Later they decided the schizophrenic diagnosis was a bit off, because I was "too emotional" and apparently schizophrenics have a "flat affect". so they decided I was bipolar! and they put me on mood stabilizers (lithium at first, then others) and the older ADs (elavil mostly) but it was the SSRI's that I was given after my dad died 27 yrs ago, that did the most damage, in my opinion. I lost the ability to feel after that. and now it seems as if I have a backlog of grief for the all the losses along the way- for my dad, still, even to this day, and also to a lesser degree my mother (our relationship was never good, she was incredibly abusive in every way possible) and several beloved cats... as well as other assorted losses. I think it's odd that I've continued to see the therapist I have now, in spite of the fact that she's never once said anything even remotely comforting when I cry. And now she's getting frustrated and voicing that frustration, although she never says it's because I'm crying. She says she doesn't know what advice to give me, because I haven't been clear about what the "problem" is. I tell her that I'm incredibly sad and that I don't always know why. I think maybe I do know why a lot of the time, but as I write this, I am thinking that the reason I don't share what I am sad about is actually because she's never said one empathetic or sympathetic thing to me while I was crying. Why would I trust her with that information? I have no reason to believe that she'd understand my grief, since she can't seem to even acknowledge it. The old me, or rather, the younger me LOL would have been embarrassed to be crying and would have shut down (which was incredibly easy to do when I was drugged, I could rarely cry at all eventually, nor feel any other emotion) but it's funny I keep seeing her and sitting there and getting choked up about something that I'm thinking, and I don't hold back the tears. I don't sob or anything like that but I let the tears flow. I think when I see her again I will try to get up the courage to tell her that I think it's pretty odd that she's never once said anything comforting when I cried... and maybe ask her why that is. I could be wrong but I think she's attributed my "progress" to her wonderful therapy skills. I have not made any "progress" at all. When I first met her I was in acute WD and I was a basket case of severe anxiety, barely able to breathe or sit still. I saw her a few times but had to quit because as it turned out she was not associated with a prescriber and I needed one to get the meds to do my taper, so I went somewhere else for that. But after I got off the lexapro, I decided to go back and see her, since she was at least somewhat against drugs in general. Or so she said. I liked having someone to check in with on a regular basis, but she's never fit the bill as far as what I really want from a therapist. I'd really rather have like a life coach, but those are expensive and I am dirt poor with lousy insurance LOL so my options are limited and I decided I'd stick with her and see if I could make it work. but now I think it may be time to move on. I don't know if grief counselling would be help or not. But it's something to look into, I guess. Thanks to everyone who has posted here thus far, you've really helped me to sort this out. and @FindRest I hope your journey is as short and uneventful as possible.
  20. I know how you feel. It will get better. I was unable to do 1 push up at the worst times in withdrawal. Now i am able to do personal bests!
  21. Sending you a virtual hug. Try not to panic (my BP would then in turn skyrocket) as I absolutely believe you can heal from this. Keep in touch.
  22. Thanks I triad it bu it seems I just cant tolarate anythig.
  23. Exactly! Thank you for reaching out to me, @Andie, and for your valuable advice. ❤️
  24. I understand why you are worried. I’ve been there too. It’s like every option could be the wrong one and the worry that comes along with that just exacerbates everything. the one thing that has got me through every time my symptoms were really bad was stability and holding. I was having really unpredictable results with the compounded Pristiq after I got to about 20mg. I needed to come off hence the switch to Prozac. We can’t get the store bought 25mg here in Australia so 50mg is the lowest available and I started compounding from there. Chessiecat has reduced her dosage down using compounded Pristiq and I don’t think she hasn’t had any problems. Even if you did go the Compunding route you would still need to taper slowly. I wish I could give you some better advice.
  25. You’ve hit the nail on the head, h2h. I’m so sorry for you and all of us. So much grieving to do. But, I do believe there is a lot of strength in grieving. Hugs.
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