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  1. Well, first I want to thank Alto for creating this site which helped immensely during those hard times (and there were many ) and also to all the members whom helped along the way. I finished my taper 4 years ago this month after I believe was 3 other month long tapers had failed. This last time I started a 10% taper in December 2013 after being on mostly 10 mg . Paxil and a few runs of 20 mg. I finished my taper I believe April 15th 2015. The last 6 months of the taper which was basically dust particles of Paxil was brutal. The next year was pretty rough with anhedonia and being diagnosed with an autoimmune disease that I am certain ether Paxil or the antibiotic Levaquin caused (if you read my story you will find that Levaquin started this whole cascading process of decreasing health and medicines. Year two I was feeling better but still not myself. Not really interested in my prior hobbies. Year 3 is when I was really starting to change back to ME again and was interested in lots of things again. The only thin that has held me back is the physical pain from my autoimmune issues. I have considered myself healed for about a year now but it seems like there was even more to come, which is where I'm at now. Doing just great ,although I do have lower libido than I thought I would. Without TMI , was the equivalent of an 18 year old until about the time Paxil pooped out on me. I was 45 then and now 50 so I guess this might be considered normal aging but I will never know🙄. Anyway, all parts work but not as good as before and not as often, so for the PSSD people, it does get better, but at my age now I'm not sure how I'm supposed to be🤔. So there it is in a nutshell, things are really good, I'm in a shitload of pain from AI issues but life is still great. It's been a really long time since I have been on here and I don't visit too often at all anymore because I'm too busy at life. I'm going to post a link to my story so anyone interested can see how I was able to do it. If anyone has any questions, I will try to answer when I can because I'm so damn busy at life again.
  2. Hi Everyone, A year ago I never thought I would be writing this, but I am here to tell you that HEALING IS POSSIBLE! Here is my story; I hope it helps... Like many of you on here, I was prescribed an antidepressant (the SSRI Paxil) after going through a period of prolonged stress that left me anxious and depressed (though, ironically, nothing even close to how depressed and anxious I was AFTER coming off the Paxil and going into a prolonged withdrawal). I was extremely hesitant to go on anything that would, “mess around with my brain chemistry” because I use my brain a lot in my work as a...wait for it...school psychologist! Yes, even with my deep knowledge of mental health, I still got sucked into the medication trap! I just wanted the pain to go away and, while I knew therapy was an option, I irrationally thought that my thoughts were “normal” and couldn’t be changed...who knows, maybe, as Victor Frankl once alluded, my ‘neuroses’ were a normal reaction to an abnormal world...but that’s another story and I know you guys want to get to the good part about recovery. Anyway, thankfully, I was only put on a very small dose (10mg) of Paxil and I was able to feel the benefits quickly. Because it worked, I decided to just keep taking it...and no doctor who refilled my prescription during the 10 YEARS+ that I was on it EVER suggested that I quit...they just kept writing the script; indeed, some even asked me if I wasn’t ready for a higher dose (thank God I didn’t go that route). Fast forward to winter of 2017 and I began thinking it was time to go off the Paxil for a variety of reasons including the fact that I was getting some weird side effects. My doctor at the time (just a regular GP, not a psychiatrist as here in Canada any MD can prescribe antidepressants) suggested that I take 5mg for 2 weeks then quit. I knew better than to do that, so I came up with a tapering schedule (something I cobbled together myself from a bunch of research online....but unfortunately not Surviving Antidepressants as I didn’t know of the site yet). Doctor thought I was being ridiculous to want to slow taper, but nevertheless prescribed a liquid suspension and I began dropping 1mg per week. All was OK until I got to below 5mg (half my dose)...that's when the more intense physical and psychological withdrawal symptoms appeared (head zaps, weepy, low mood, etc.)...so I decided to slow down and drop dosage every 2 weeks by 0.5mg instead. It was still hard though and the brain zaps continued, but my mood seemed OK-ish, but not really 'normal' for me. At that time, I went to see a naturopath who put me on a mood boosting supplement that has some GABA and 5-HTP and L-theanine. She also gave me St.Johns Wort to take 400mg 3x per day (total of 1200mg a day). I don’t think either of these really worked during that time and I eventually tapered off them. Anyway, I completed my taper by mid June 2018. In July 2018 I went on a 3 week trip to Morocco. I was relatively fine in July though I slept VERY poorly on the trip and overall the trip was very exhausting and it was very hot! When I got back I went into a total spiral; I could not handle even the slightest amount of mental stress or my body would have a near panic attack. It was as if my body was sort of out of control/ possesed. I won’t get into a huge story detailing the timeline and exact symptoms I had because this is not a novel, but I will say that within a matter of a couple of months I was a total mess, much like many of you. My sleep was f*#$ed, I rapidly lost my appetite and lost weight (OK, I'll admit, that was a bit of a silver lining for me...haha), and anxiety and eventually a deep depression were daily guest. I read and researched a lot to try to figure out what was going on! And that’s how I found Surviving Antidepressants and read other people’s stories and realised what was happening to me. When I spoke to my doctor about it, she dismissed the notion of protracted withdrawal, saying instead that I was just ‘relapsing’ (yeah...right...only feeling 1000% worse than I ever had BEFORE the Paxil) and offering me a different SSRI to which I said no, of course. I have to say, that while in the depths of my withdrawal and what I can only describe as a living nightmare that I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy (I know you guys can totally relate) I never thought I would get better. One of the worst parts was not knowing IF and WHEN I would recover. Honestly, one of the things that kept me from going back on the meds was my fear of ending up on a psych-med merry-go-round that might leave me debilitated and steal even more years of healthy, vibrant living from me. All I could do was go one day at a time, with the knowledge that some days would be better and some worse than others. I tried to keep close to people as social connections always helped. I binge watched Netflix like it was going out of style (normally I don’t watch any TV as I have lots of interests and hobbies). I also got out in nature as much as possible since I have always found that healing. Going to the gym fell off the radar as did a lot of 'self-care' stuff that I had been so good and diligent at doing BPW (before Paxil withdrawal), but I tried to accept that and forgave myself for not having the strength to keep it all up. I tried to eat (when I had an appetite) as healthy as possible; did a lot of take-out, but luckily there are healthy options available now and I would also eat whatever others were willing to feed me! Anyway, slowly slowly, things began to improve...but I am not going to lie and say that it was fast (I wish I COULD say that because lord knows, it was what I wanted desperately to hear while I was suffering through this)...It took me about a full year off the very last micro-dose to feel about 70% 'myself'. Now, 19 months off, I feel 90 to 95% 'myself' and much much stronger; somehow I even survived the death of my beloved dog 3 months ago without meds (I grieved hard and it hasn't been easy, but I accept this as part of life now). If I were to plot my 'healing' over time I think the graph would resemble the stock market graphs, with daily and weekly fluctuations, but with the overall trajectory being 'up'. I want to let you guys know you are HEROES and SO BRAVE for taking on this journey. While this process is so incredibly hard, there IS hope and recovery WILL come...our brains are ‘plastic’ and I truly liken this process as a sort of 'brain injury' that needed time to heal. Please stay strong. One day, looking at it all from the other side of this nightmare, you will be glad you made it through and are med free. Much love and strength to all.
  3. Hey @Cocopuffz17, congratulations and many thanks for sharing your success story with us and thanks for your encouraging words! I think you put a lot of effort in it and also very brave of you to share your photos and videos with us. After how much time your hair began to regrowth? I lost many hairs in the last1.5 years (I have androgenetic alopecia). So I hope some hair will regrowth as well. Hair loss gives me additional depression as well 😕 I also took Paxil and struggling mainly with a lot of fatigue and tiredness. I wished more people would know how much damage this drugs can cause. I also think food is very important. I recently started a vegan diet. Thats exactly the same thought that I had All the best! 👍
  4. Here’s my story of the highs and lows, curses and blessings I’ve experienced since I started Paxil in 1999. I was born in Southern California in 1960 and lived there all my life. Looking back, I suffered from anxiety since my 20’s, but it was mostly episodic and triggered by major negative experiences. In 1999, my anxiety became constant due to work and family issues. I went to see my GP, who prescribed a daily dose of Paxil. At first, it helped me deal with daily life, but like many others, I gained weight and found myself unmotivated to exercise. I didn’t see a therapist nor seek any non-medication-based help. I continued to have anxious episodes but managed to handle them. In 2006, my father died, and I had to make the decision to take him off life support. It wasn’t a clear-cut decision and caused me a lot of anguish. I began a descent into constant anxiety exacerbated by feelings of impending doom, both in my personal health and my professional life. Every ache or pain became a sign of a deadly disease, and every mistake I made at work would get me fired. I began seeing a psychologist to help, but didn’t have much success until 2008, when I found one who could help me with my feelings of guilt over my father’s death, and used EMDR and CBT to help me identify the root of my anxiety and use behavioral tools to manage it. It was then I began to develop my approach to anxiety as a chronic, though manageable, condition. In 2006, I tried to quit Paxil since it didn’t help my anxiety. My doctor told me to taper, but didn’t offer many details, and I tried tapering much too quickly. In late 2006, I discovered the Paxilprogress website and got great advice and support on tapering. I began a very gradual taper in 2007, and was Paxil-free by 2009. It wasn’t easy and I had many setbacks, but paxilprogress’ members and my psychologist gave me a ton of support. My wife, a woman of great faith, reminded me I was meant for better things than to be lost to anxiety and depression--God had work for me to do. I continued seeing my therapist every other week up till this September, when my wife and I moved to Portugal to explore Europe for a few years. We have one son, who’s in graduate school in Michigan and starting his own career, so the time was right. Anxiety is still part of my life but it doesn’t control me or the decisions I make. I still take a low dose of Klonopin when things get too much, but no more than one or two a month. I use CBT and “reality checking” to keep my catastrophic thoughts in check. Looking back, even at its worst, my life with anxiety was good. I was able to function, and participate in our son’s life, even if I had to force myself sometimes. My advice to those just starting the journey: Don’t be too hard on yourself. Even with a slow taper, there were times I had to use a higher dose sometimes, until I was ready to take the next step. It’s not a race; do what works for you. Find a therapist or at least someone who can offer you support and keep you rooted in reality. Medication alone will never be the answer. Whether its CBT to other tools, find the behavioral practices that work for you. Accept the fact that anxiety is part of who you are. Whatever the cause, anxiety will be with me until the day I die. I’ve learned to manage it, and most days its just a dim feeling far in the back of my mind. What I now understand is that it only has the power I give it. It no longer controls my actions or decisions, and therapy has helped me separate irrational anxious thoughts from genuine concerns and problems. The short story is, like any other chronic condition, it takes the right tools, the right people, and determination to manage anxiety and reduce it to an inconvenience instead of a monster in my own mind.
  5. @Cocopuffz17 well done Coco I’m very proud of you! yet another Paxil survivor!!! how much do you attribute the Plant P diet to your success ? and do you still remain on it ?
  6. What an awesome read💖 You are a true inspiration and a Paxil survivor💪 This post gives so much hope to all of us. Thank you for sharing, and enjoy your new med free life🙏
  7. Hi there:) I was a member of paxilprogress since 2004 and then the site was shut down...I was on paxil for 8.5 years starting in 2001...after a horrible withdrawal ..at 11 months off i went back on paxil again for a few years then did a successful 4 year taper with compounded pills.. i have now been paxil free since June 1, 2014..paxil progress members will know who i am:) Michele aka MapleLeafGirl Admin note: MapleLeafGirl's Introductions topic: ☼ Mapleleafgirl off Paxil
  8. I just made a clean exit from SSRI (Paxil CR) for almost 3 years down the line. My journey was really tough. I can help you guyz for the same. I almost studied every corner of Brain and this chemical pathway. I had to first understand about this chemical behavior in order to overcome its effects. I had initially failed twice, once cold turkey during initial 3rd month and 2nd failed instance was after 1.5 years. Doctors never say anything about its ill effects. Later I realized I had to think in terms of Neurosurgeon level. One of the danger zones which I encountered during withdrawal symptoms are Heart Palpitations. Below list might sound crazy but those were the ones which helped me out of SSRi loop. I can write a book upon these lists, each point has its own significance, Continuous Discipline Constant alertness about thoughts and behavior Should completely avoid negative thoughts Should not pull panic button for palpitations as it is temporary. Keep moving until light comes. Walking is must : Around 10km / day Exercise Yoga Completely stop internet browsing/downloads/ Breathing rituals Completely go Vegan (Except for few fish). Meditation is must Sleep well atleast 8 hours Have a healthy diet Drink smoothies every week Ban coffee Initiate Diet plan every month. Stop music’s Stop internet time (being in front of PC) Stop playing CG games. Go to office early and come early Focus on work to deviate unwanted thoughts Watch out for CBT and other health related videos (TTC helped me a lot) Positive self-talk Positive Affirmations before sleep Laugh at least once : Watch out for jokes/comedy Eat Fish once or twice a week. Completely avoid world affair Don’t think of future Watch out for stressors and reduce stressors Reduce salt and sugar intake. For neuroplasticity – avoid all sorts of stress and negativity. Take good care of self. Incrementally grow. What out for emotions. Have military instinct. Spend time with nature. Reduce sedentary life keep moving. Do what would make me happy. Stop whinning. Reduce anger and accept it. Reduce sugar intake, Avoid coke or any such drinks. Be mindful. Drink lot of water. Eat seeds/dry fruits/walnuts/all kinds of nuts Eat fruits in office. Avoid Traffic if possible. Relax your mind and body. Watch out for Brain fogs. Circadian rhythm / Natural clock should be in proper sync. Intake saffron. Eat Mackerel/Sardines/Tuna/Salmon for Omega 3. Eliminate Smoking Eliminate drinking alcohol Eliminate Poor diet Spend time exposing skin to Sun. Drink lime honey water mixed with Turmeric early morning. Last but not the least one of the most important No Porn and No Fap. I may have missed out few points. Let me know if you need any road maps. After successfully quitting SSRi I met my Doctor and he was really happy with my exit journey. 2 years off since taking SSRi, I just came here to say my positive story because I had visited this site during my SSRi intake. EDIT: The medication which a depressed person consumes tricks the Brain generating chemicals from their own, but one should have the will power to override all the chemical settings at any cost. The mental trauma never supports this agony and finally one could fall back to medications again. Heart Palps one would never knew was it a issue from Brain or Heart, this is like impending doom almost like death knocking the door. Fundamental story is rewire the Brain and its chemical pahtways so that the Neuroplasticity kicks in to restore old conditions. What really matters is determination/ tightly bound WILL power. Never fall back. Light comes at great cost. Cheers to all..!!
  9. Thank you so much Irishwill for coming back giving hope! I read your initial post in 2015 and remember you all these year and always wonder how you have Benn doing. Your initial success story is one of the best and now it's even better than that! So happy you made it out this far and keep living a normal life! Can I ask if you remember, what benzo did you take after paxil and for how long? Have you ever experienced sensitivity to food? If so how long did it take to resolve? Best Lex
  10. Very great to read that you also recovered from a horrible CT withdrawal from Paxil. We were in the same boat I remember. Congratulations, it is a miracle on its own to get rid of this nasty stuff!
  11. As you can see from the title this is going to be a long and in-depth story, so bear with me. I am going to write this in small paragraphs as well for people who are still having issues with light sensitivity and brain fog (hopefully it will make it a bit easier to read) I was prescribed Paxil back in summer 2003 after having a major depressive episode, i had been out of work for about 3 months by then which i'm pretty sure what the trigger was for this episode. I have always suffered from social anxiety and irrational thinking patterns making me a natural worrier. I started off on 20mg a day and after about 8 weeks or so felt much better and just started to get on with my life again. About a half a year later i went down to 10mg a day with not much of a problem, another 6 months passed and i felt it was time to come off them, i just went cold turkey from 10mg, felt fine for the first few days then it hit me, i felt really low and started climbing the walls so to speak, back on 10mg it was. I carried on on 10mg until winter 2008 where i really felt like it was time to come off these drugs, i went down to 5mg a day by splitting the pill into quarters, then 5mg every other day, then zero, it was now Jan 2009. I was really apprehensive about quitting because of the previous cold turkey experience but i knew this time i had tapered down, but still too quick really, because of Paxil's short half-life. I felt fine though and thought i was home dry, that feeling lasted 2 months. I was hit with depression but didn't really think much to it, i have always had little bouts of mild depression before and even while on antidepressants, but this feeling lasted and lasted and lasted, along with a feeling of being off balanced, sudden vertigo spells, brain zaps, panic attacks, bouts of insomnia and a general sense of impending doom, all of this came in a package of waves and windows, very little windows!. I had these symptoms for the best part of 4 years, 4 years of swearing like a trooper, cursing GSK, pretending to be okay for family, friends and work colleagues (yes i had a full time job though all of this) and moments of wishing i was never born. But you know what, i am glad i took antidepressants because they saved my life. I had moments during that period when i genuinely felt like i was never going to make it through to the other side, that "feeling" of normal was a distant dream, i felt like maybe i had permanent brain damage. 2013 was my year, that was the year i felt like all of my symptoms had finally subsided, i was still working, the sun was shining and i was now cycling 40 miles a week, and when i mean all my symptoms had gone i mean all of them, i couldn't believe it, i was now living that dream and feeling "normal". I am 33 now and i am very content with life, sometimes i look back from my current comfort bubble and wonder whether it was really that bad, i want all of you to be in this comfort bubble. I think what really helped me through it all was acceptance, CBT, throwing out the calendar of time, patience, supplements (omega-3/vit e, magnesium), gentle exercise/fresh air and always remembering the quote "spring always follows winter", hell i would have had that tattooed on my forehead if only i didn't look like a recovering drug addict. I do currently have health issues though, which i have seen a doctor about, he said it was to do with stress and anxiety, what!!, i couldn't be more chilled out nowadays if i tried. So i bypassed his verdict and went and got a private blood test to check my vitamin D levels (my symptoms have gotten worse over the winter just gone and i have been researching a lot recently about diet and nutrients). I am deficient in vitamin D and am starting to take supplements for it. I can honest to God (thank you) say i feel i have fully recovered from Paxil withdrawal despite my current health, which to be fair, i have never had a good diet or been in optimal health, but knowledge is power and i am now aiming for "optimal" health. I want to wish every single one of you the best luck in the universe with this, it is crazy, life is crazy. And i promise to try not to start every paragraph with a "I".
  12. Hi all, I logged in for one more time today after my last post now more than 2 years ago already! I am still doing pretty well. Now working for 4 years in my current job. There are still some residual issues which I did not have before my horrific almost cold turkey withdrawal. Also I still have to cope with the ongoing medical ignorance and my two elder sisters who still think my whole experience with Paxil/Seroxat is nonsense... and still sometimes sugggrest I should see a psychiatrist... I completely avoid the subject now in my sparse contacts with them. Luckily my 83 years old mum has been of great support , knows my story well and is so happy to see me function normally again. Also my current GP takes my story seriously. But my heart breaks when I still read recent stories here from doctors who still insist that WD does not exist and poeple need this stuff for life. So in short, I have my life back at least for the largest part. Now 12 years after the last dose I wonder if even further healing will take place but nothing is impossible I think I am pleased to see this site still exist after sites like PP and others have closed long ago. Hang on everybody and good to read that more and mroe people are aware of the need to taper extpremely slowly. I still wonder how things would have been if I would have known that 14 years ago. But I am still here and did eventuelly largely recover from a gruesom cold tuerkey withdrawal which makes me formly belief that recovery is in the end possible for even the worst cases.
  13. I posted the following this time last year on another forum. It was my 3 year update. Today - I am active, healthy and busy living my life with barely a thought to WD. I feel pleasure and pain, excitement and disappointment, joy and hurt, I cry and I laugh - all the normal range of emotions that are part of the human condition. I have my energy and motivation back. Today - I consider myself a full success story because any more healing will be a bonus only. This, is without question, the hardest thing that I have ever gone through but I do not regret doing it. I am completely 'med' free and have my own mind back (for what that is worth lol) so IF the handful of 'residual issues' (listed below) that remain, happen to stay around I consider the price worth it. Residual Issues Physical Tinnitus - this is by far the worst physical symptom. It started while on Paxil and became considerably and progressively worse once off. There are basically 2 sounds which both vary in intensity - a high pitched whine and a low buzzing. Every month or so I get a few hours break of blissful silence which gives me hope that it will completely go away one day. Can be irritating at times and I am usually aware of it but the overall impact has become minimal. Numb feet - this has stayed with me since coming off and sometimes affects my balance. It too varies in intensity but aside from being more careful in the shower (cannot tell if I am going to slip) this has less than minimal impact on my life. Vision - eyes are healthy but vision problems come and go. Mostly blurring and floaters. Minimal impact. Skin - still have worse acne outbreaks than when I was a teenager. I suspect that the hormonal system could still be adjusting. Impact on my life ....... ZERO Psychological/Emotional Stress tolerance -these have been bad for the duration and up until a couple of months ago I would have said that they were still at very low levels. Recently though, I have found myself in a number of very high stress situations and surprised myself by not falling apart - apparently I just needed some practice LOL. Impact on my life ........... moderate to minimal Anxiety levels - these have vastly improved (how could they not after the ridiculous stuff of acute WD), however ............ I still have times and they have a different 'feel' to pre- med anxiety. Impact on my life is moderate because this only impacts when the levels are bad - the regular anxiety that I have always lived with is now a walk in the park by comparison. Depression - once in a while with months between sessions. This is something that I never had pre 'meds' so I count it as a residual issue. It comes with the usual misery - crying, lethargy, suicidal thoughts etc. Impact is minimal because it happens rarely and only lasts a few days. Update Nothing has changed in the last year except for a bit more anhedonia. Although I said that it doesn't matter above, I now realize that I had hoped for some more healing. I still do not regret coming off these foul poisons and would do it again even knowing what was ahead ........... however ............ is this it?
  14. Doubt about what? I had anxiety before quitting Paxil, and even on Paxil it didn’t completely go away, then when it pooped out on me and sent me into withdrawal, the anxiety was so so severe. I’m way better than before Paxil. Anxiety doesn’t just go away until you learn how to cope with it and accept it bring there. I’m much more aware of how to do that No, very rarely
  15. Hi , Aeroman i'm italian guy who suffered from Paxil WD since December 2018 now i'm attend my 18ish months in Bad WD,my primary symptoms is DIZZINESS /instability sensation in 18 months i experienced all the symptoms in the list. Actually i feel in a suffer with no end(i'm exausted) . i read your story and i'm proud of you and your strenght. my question is : at 18 months what are your sensation? your remaning issues? and the last is you suffered all the 4 years or gradually improve? thks for reply and sorry for my bad english!!
  16. Hi Disc Great question, especially given the times we're in and your location (I'm So Cal born). I actually still have a generic Klonopin script for .5 mg to use as needed, so we're very similar. I got the script on the advice of my therapist a year or two after I completed my withdrawal from Paxil. He wasn't a big fan of meds, especially benzos, but recommended it. Given you're still in the early stages of WD, here are my thoughts. The reason I have the Klonopin script is because, as my therapist explained at the time, there's a physical component to anxiety that sometimes can't be managed by CBT or other coping tools. Basically its just the way we're made, and sometimes we need something to get us over a difficult physical/emotional period. These triggering periods are when I take a pill. For example, I've always been an introvert and don't like being the center of attention. Pre-retirement, my job occasionally required me to make public presentations that were sometimes televised to the community. For especially challenging presentations, I would cut a Klonopin in half and take it a couple hours before the meeting to keep me clear-headed. I also don't like flying and may take one before a flight. When work got really stressful, I would take one on Sunday night so I could go in on Monday in a good frame of mind. Typically, a bottle of 30 pills will last me six months, so I don't take them often. Having said that, my suggestion, before you think about taking a benzo more than occasionally is to separate your WD symptoms and associated feelings from your "baseline" anxiety. To deal with withdrawal and truly recover, you need to adopt and practice effective coping strategies like CBT or similar behavioral modification tools. There are links to coping tools on this site. To ensure long-term recovery, you really need to address the issues that put you on Paxil in the first place. If you were okay until a couple of days ago and tapered at the end of last month, I would say you're hitting wave of withdrawal symptoms. You're going to experience these "windows and waves" as you taper, and the best way to deal with them is to start practicing coping now, (and participating here for support). I'd give coping a try first unless the physical symptoms become unbearable. I would not use a benzo as a support for withdrawal--as Gridley as mentioned to others, benzos are addictive and you can experience withdrawal after just a couple of weeks' use or sometimes intermittent use. It took me a couple years to get through my taper and recovery, so you might want to think about giving yourself some time to see if coping tools and time will help with your withdrawal before turning to another med. Hope this helped!
  17. I wanted to know during your withdrawal process, did you ever have to take klonipin or ativan when withdrawal symptoms got really bad and unbearable? I have a 30 day supply of Klonipin at .50mg. I am only suppose to take it as needed. But the past few days have been really rough. I have morning anxiety when I wake up. At work, I am a little disoriented, brain fog, etc. I did a drop in dose at the last week of February. I was fine until a couple days ago. I'm on Paxil, was on 30mg, then dropped to about 27mg (end of Feb). I don't know if I should wait it out, but add Klonipin if needed. Or go back to 30mg. And what is your personal rule of thumb if you are using anti-anxiety during withdrawal? Should I take it if I really need it? And up to how many times a week should I take it? Last thing I want is to have to taper off of that after tapering Paxil. I was reading your story and thread and thought you would have insight. Some mornings I wake up thinking I will never be able to get off this drug, feared, and feeling all alone, but just reading your success story kind of gave me a slight window, plus I am almost at the end of my work shift, which 8 hours feels like eternity during withdrawals.
  18. Jaywill little did we know what we would put ourselves through when starting Paxil All those years ago .. It’s a demon .. and some you have done well coming off it !!
  19. Longroadhome

    DanaG Healing will come!!

    Hello Dana thank you for posting your success story I am also a long term Paxil user and have just started a slow taper after months of holding due to a too fast taper in the beginning . what symptoms of WD did you have and for how long ? So glad you are nearly there it gives me hope because as you say the scariest thing is thinking we will never recover. what were the weird side effects you had while taking Paxil do you think you Had developed tolerance ? I did hence my taper. and last question how old are you as I feel age may make a difference in how long it takes to recover from WD thank you LRH
  20. @Judith thank you so much for your reply . I was also told I had a chemical imbalance for years . Over the years I went on and came off Paxil as soon as depression and anxiety surfaced . I was able to over the years with ease. Then in 2004 I started it again and remained on it for years buying into the chemical imbalance rather than trying to help myself . It scared me so taking the pill was much easier . anyway I developed tolerance to the drug in 2018. A common problem after years of continuous use. And since then I’ve been tapering and holding on and off . I am determined to be rid of it once and for all . thank you for the videos I know they will be really helpful as my mind is stuck in negative mode. As in “will I ever recover” . many thanks Judy take good care of yourself Elaine
  21. Longroadhome

    Tao of the Brassmonkey

    Brass you talk about “real recovery” happening once off medication so can I ask you; I hit poop out 10 months ago on Paxil then a too fast taper led to heightened symptoms . I’ve held at 8.4mg Paxil since Feb 2019. Do I hold now until I have no symptoms then continue Will that ever happen while still on Paxil and having poop out? You said it took you 2.5 years to navigate your way out of poop out while tapering before starting to experience some kind of stability while continuing to decrease. Therefore do I now continue to taper using the sliding scale because I started with poop out and it’s not going to get better unless I decrease and get off Paxil? In other words would homeostasis happen while still on this drug and having hit poop out, if I hold? Or indeed any kind of stability ?  I value your opinion as my journey with poop out and Paxil is similar to yours.  Thank you so much for the strength you give to us through your messages. You are my hero. have I missed the post Brass ?
  22. Hi Coco, I have a form of psoriatic arthritis/ spondylarthritis. It mainly affects my tendons and muscles and no joints. This could have also started from Levaquin poisoning because that is what started this whole mess almost 17 years ago. It’s very possible the Paxil was just masking it because it always appeared when I tapered and disappeared when I reinstated. For the record NO ONE on any side of my family had this or psoriasis and I was fine until I took these meds. There is definitely a correlation. I’m now managing it with Humira because basically I can’t walk without it. It makes me about 90% better.
  23. Longroadhome

    Tao of the Brassmonkey

    I’m looking into the topical gel now so thank you. Brass you talk about “real recovery” happening once off medication so can I ask you; I hit poop out 10 months ago on Paxil then a too fast taper led to heightened symptoms . I’ve held at 8.4mg Paxil since Feb 2019. Do I hold now until I have no symptoms then continue Will that ever happen while still on Paxil and having poop out? You said it took you 2.5 years to navigate your way out of poop out while tapering before starting to experience some kind of stability while continuing to decrease. Therefore do I now continue to taper using the sliding scale because I started with poop out and it’s not going to get better unless I decrease and get off Paxil? In other words would homeostasis happen while still on this drug and having hit poop out, if I hold? Or indeed any kind of stability ? I value your opinion as my journey with poop out and Paxil is similar to yours. Thank you so much for the strength you give to us through your messages. You are my hero.
  24. Hey, great to hear! Congrats this drug is a PITA. Glad you are doing well What is your autoimmune condition, if you don't mind me asking? I also developed a few while on paxil and they are reversing now that I am off it and have changed my nutrition
  25. Longroadhome

    Tao of the Brassmonkey

    Fantastic Three years free of Paxil what a hard journey and what an achievement well done. LRH
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