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  1. I wrote already a lot in this forum and others, and like many I was totally unaware of what was ahead of me when I quit Seroxat. Even after repeated attempts to quit, the dime did not fell and in September 2007, still ignorant about WD and tapering, I quit for the final time from 10 mg just before going on a holiday to Italy. The holiday was about the best 2 weeks of my life, but one month after being home again the withdrawal hit me hard as ever. And that was the start of a long long road though Hell and beyond, in which I visited numerous therapists, lost my job, tens of thousands of bugs and felt like worse than the living dead for almost 2 years. But this is about succes stories... The good news is that recovery started in the second year off, albeit slowly and bumpy whit long and nasty waves for another couple of years . Now after more than 6.5 years off I feel pretty much close to healed. Many symptoms are gone completely, I feel mentally pretty stable (not to confuse with very happy because I still have many things to worry about in life), a pretty active social life and embared for a 80% job for the first time in Februatry this year. Unfortunately, my employer had to close their business recently so I have to hunt for a job again, but for many years this was really impossible. But I know that even further recovery will come and though it takes 7-8 years in total, we DO recover from this and we ARE able to built a new life. I will give an other update if even better news is available.
  2. cymbaltawithdrawal5600

    Recovery Success Stories from Around the Web

    "Wendywoo" from Paxilprogress, a now defunct site When you finally get off seroxat (paxil) it is hard to come back here at times, it is a reminder of very difficult and painful times. I have really just popped in to tell you how life is for me, nearly one year off, and also try to encourage those who struggle with the thought of a very slow taper. It took me over 2 years from July 2005 to August 2007 to go through my taper. I used liquid seroxat and don't think I could have done it if I hadn't used liquid. The first drops were quite manageable and then I hit a really bad patch as I realised I was dropping by 2mg each time - way too fast. That was when I found paxil progress. The drops were sometimes easy, sometimes hard. Stabilising sometimes took days, others weeks, before I was able to drop again. I learned to listen to my body and work with it to know when the next drop should be made. I refused to go by a schedule, or set myself a goal. It would take as long as it would take, and once I adopted that mindset and was determined to minimise my WD symptoms, it was okay. I managed to work and look after my kids all the way through. Saying that I had some horrendous WD symptoms, the worst being a foul temper like a red rage. Problems with sleep. Restless legs (terrible).Terrible concentration problems. Here I am, nearly a year off and life is *okay* for me. Physically I don't think I have any long lasting stuff going on. Possibly a general muscular aching all over. Mentally I am much sharper, and only when tired have to search for words (I used to do that all the time in WD) Immediately I finished on seroxat I had 3 weeks off sick with stress. think it all caught up with me and I had terrible anxiety attacks.. these passed. I do have some depression issues but nothing more than I had before seroxat (that's just me!) I know that not everyone is as lucky. Don't think for a minute that I had a mild reaction to seroxat. When I cold turkeyed I thought I would die and had terrifying akathesia. It put me off trying WD for a very long time (4 yrs) Even going down literally a drop of seroxat could bring out WD symptoms. I am just an ordinary person, and if I could do it, you can too. I want to thank all at PP who helped me get through. I would NEVER have got through and reached the end without this message board. There are wonderful people here. I also want to tell everyone who thinks they will never make it - you will. But go slowly, so slowly, listen to your body and know that one day there WILL be an end to this. I wish you all, all the best wishes in the world. SEROXAT 20mg since 1999/2000 during marriage breakdown. Started taper July 2005 from 20mg. Very slow taper on liquid seroxat. Last dose 26 August 2007. Now seroxat free!
  3. LINK: pax80a's Introduction topic Hi! Some might know me from PP, back there I was Pax80, from Portugal. My story is quite long so i'm not going into detail. The withdrawal was hellish and lasted so long. I was bedridden for some years and was in panic mode all the time. I had to learn walking, eating, driving again. Time and patience was key. Tried every supplement and treatment in the world and nothing worked, despite thinking it could be doing something. Only 6years after the last dose of paroxetine /seroxat) I felt 100% better. Ok there are some issues with muscle tension, but I can deal with that. Hang in there, it does go away.
  4. Hi Musk. I can honestly say I've never thought of my story as amazing and this is the only place I've ever told it. (I did post on the precursor to this forum once but it shut down soon after - but I hadn't been through the half of it then) What do you mean by the highlighted bit? You started these drugs to cure degenerative problems or to cure the fear of degenerative problems? Sorry if i'm being thick! I think what helped me was that I tried to come off these drugs so many times that I was used to the suffering (I don't mean to sound like a martyr there but this was a well worn path for me) . I've literally missed years off work coming off Seroxat, breaking down and having to reinstate. Each time cost me about 6 months of life and work. Moving to Prozac and then Sertraline had the same effect. These drugs never suited me so I knew I had to get off them. By the time I'd gone in to the withdrawal detailed on this forum I had run out of options. I didn't know I would recover, all I knew is I couldn't go back to the drugs. At that point all I had was myself if that makes sense. I felt dreadful for a long time but there was no choice. I just had to get through it. I had days of deep despair as you can probably relate. But I also had days that gave me hope. I read the right books and treated it as a nervous breakdown (as I mentioned in my intro topic). I'd had breakdowns before and recovered. This was just a bigger one and unlike any of the ones before but the principles are the same. Of course some days I just wanted to give up but I just reminded myself if I carry on it will inevitably get better. I had bad shakes for quite a while in my hands and was struggling typing before I went off work in my first few months of withdrawal. I also had the internal tremor. I used to say to my doctor 'feel my arms they are shaking' and he couldn't because they weren't. It was all 'inside' my arms. He used to look at me like I was an idiot. I don't think I had the electricity thing ( I didn't have the head zaps either that a lot of people get which must be similar). Don't worry about them. They will go. They won't harm you, even if they last a long time. I don't get the internal tremors or shakes anymore and there was no damage to my arms. I understand your worry though so don't think I'm dismissing it. One day I was where you are. One day you'll be doing what I'm doing have been through it and recovered yourself.
  5. Thanks Hibari and Hi! I'm glad someone else has felt like this (well I'm not but you know what I mean!) The feeling that everyone was else was laughing and joking and enjoying life and I was just watching them through a window plagued me for a long time. It came quite early in my withdrawal and was probably one of the main reasons I 'broke'. The intensity was unimaginable and was classic withdrawal depression with hindsight. It isn't really true, it's just a (very strong) emotion right now. Of course I'm 20 years older than I was when I started these drugs so I would be different anyway but in withdrawal it feels like you've lost your whole sense of being and you'll never have fun again. It's just a trick of your nerves so don't believe it! I also spent quite a while grieving my youthful self and regretting all the things I hadn't done. I may well have not done those things anyway but the mind works like that when you're looking back all the time. The drugs did however make me complacent and lazy and the good thing about coming off them is that I've done more in the last two years than I've done in the last 18 before that. I've bought a house for one thing and that is something I never thought I'd do! I have regrets and I do wonder what I would have done if I'd not been on Seroxat all those years because I also lost my ambition. I would have liked to have been a dad but I'm getting to 50 nearly and I don't think I'd have the energy anymore!Those feelings were intense at one time but they are now just thoughts that I can easily dismiss. They don't plague me anymore but they do occasionally rear up. I suppose they would have even if I'd never been on the drugs. I suppose that's the key to all this withdrawal stuff, everything gets magnified - every emotion, every hurt, every worry, every regret. Life isn't perfect really for any of us. I just resolved to try and make the most of it when I recovered. I haven't always succeeded but I try 😎 Like you I feel my 'drugged' life is over. After prolonged use of these drugs things are unsurprisingly different for some of us. But different doesn't mean worse. I think your interests will return when you feel better in yourself. At least that's how it worked for me. Best wishes to you Hibari. I know what you're going through and I know it will change and you will figure it out.
  6. Hi MMMM, I think I missed the 'loss of personality' symptom when I responded to SuphaSet. Looking back it was probably my greatest fear. I think this is where Claire Weekes books are particularly useful. I had basically lost all my confidence and felt my personality had disintegrated. I've never been a looker or had money but I've always been capable of a **** joke or two to make people laugh😃so that was all I had really. And it was gone. Or so I thought. Weekes talks about this 'disintegration of the self' and how it isn't real but just an exaggerated response to a stressful situation. Basically the nervous system is shot. And when all you think about is suffering the colour and interest goes from your personality. This is normal. It's hard not to end up like this when going through what we all have/are going through. I spent months on my own going slowly bonkers. I was a shell. Totally broken. The change came when my nerves started to recover and I made it back to work. That was a slow process. Even after returning it was still tough but I was slowly started to get a bit of confidence back. I think I went out for the first time in about 18 months not long after returning to work with some old colleagues and that helped. It was all about feeling 'normal' again. Today all that stuff isn't even an issue. I probably feel better than I did on the drugs in that respect. I'm more natural now if that makes sense. I always felt a bit drunk on Seroxat and acted like a giddy idiot at times. Now I'm just a drug-free idiot 🤣 who can have a laugh most of the times, but can also a bit of a grumpy git too. So, like most people really! If you're going through the 'personality disintegration' feelings then I would really recommend Claire Weekes books like 'Self Help For Your Nerves'. She is brilliant at putting your mind at ease and explaining things logically. Regardless, those feelings will eventually pass as your nerves recover. Best Wishes to you.
  7. cymbaltawithdrawal5600

    Recovery Success Stories from Around the Web

    SCHNAUZERPOWER From Paxilprogress, a now defunct site 2 Year Update Hi everyone, Well, it seems like I just posted my one year update, but here I am posting my 2 year update! All I can say is that things have definitely improved for me. I still have some symptoms pop up every now and then but it's nothing I cannot manage anymore. There have been some nights when I have difficulty sleeping; some days I feel weepy and anxious; and yes my ears are still ringing. But all of these have gone down in intensity which is why I can cope better. And oh yes, episodes of brain zaps have been less and less and it's almost gone now. I used to not be able to tolerate any form of exercise, but now I do walking, 25 minutes on the stationary bike and some free weights. I am steadily losing weight at last. I think what really helped boost my recovery these past few months were the Magnesium caps and Fish Oil. I take 250 mg of Chelated Magnesium and 1200 mg of Fish Oil everyday and it seems to help me a lot. But the best tool that I have learned this past year to help me cope with withdrawal is to make sure that I STOP FEARING THE SYMPTOMS. Early in withdrawal, I was in constant fear of what I will go through and what I am going through. I was afraid of hearing my ears ring, was afraid to lie down and try to sleep, was afraid to eat things, drink medicines for it might trigger another wave. But then I realized that hey, being afraid does not make it easier for me. So whenever I feel a wave coming (which is signaled by my ringing getting louder), I just stop and breathe and say, ok just another hump but it won't kill me unless I let it kill me. So I just look forward to the ride down the hump and to how better I will feel after. So to everyone who helped me get this far, THANK YOU SO MUCH. I hope you guys give me the opportunity to help you in return and change your lives as much as you guys have changed mine. To all those who are just about to hit their "HUMP", hang in there. It will be a bumpy ride, but the ride down will be well worth it, I promise Started Seroxat 20mgs July 25 '07 Tapered for 1 month Nov '07 Restarted Seroxat 20mgs Dec '07 Tapered for 1 month Feb '08 Seroxat Free since March 1 '08
  8. cymbaltawithdrawal5600

    Recovery Success Stories from Around the Web

    An update from Wallflower from Paxilprogress, a now defunct site Hello, Some of you may recognise my name, but I have to admit I've not been on here much at all for some time. I am sorry for this as this place was a lifesaver for me, as I have been very, very poory with paxil withdrawal. Coupled with a change in job which meant less access to the internet and a decision to minimise my time spent thinking too much about WD I have not been around. I am going to start by saying thanks to everyone who responded to my posts, there are people who have been so supportive and understanding, even when in difficulty themselves. So thank you!!!! So an update after 2 years. I would say I'm 80% recovered and that for me is absolutely amazing as cold turkey rendered me totally emotionally and physically in peices. I had more or less every symptom and associated with seroxat withdrawal syndrome. I don't need to convince you guys, but it was unadulturated hell. Don't cold turkey if you're thinking about it. It is not mind over matter. It is endurance which is dangerous and I had so much support from family, friends and professionals. Ok, I think you get the point - sorry. Even when I talk about it now, I get lost in it. Anyway, back the present - I am living, I am laughing, I am free and in relatively good health. I am able to generally cope with what life throws at me. It has taken so much personal rehabitation - from exercise, meditation, CBT, talking and grit and determination. So there is hope! I am a better person from the experience and I like the person I am now. So never give up hope that life will improve. I know you'll read it again and again here, but I really never thought my brain would recover, but it certainly is getting there. However, I have to say my memory (both short and long term) and cognitive functioning, including concentration is not great. My sleep is erratic and I have many ADHD-like symptoms. All of which are noticable and commented on. I am not complaining about this, but I feel I need to acknowledge these challenges. I have had to learn to live with it and hope that things will continue to improve. I also occasionally have head-shocks and vibrations, but rarely. I have to tell you I suffer from depression and anxiety disorders too. I did before seroxat, when I was on it and after it. I always bear that in mind and I do not blame everything on seroxat withdrawal. I'm hopeful about improvements in this area too. Anyway, I could go on and on, but you can read my previous posts to see how desperate I have been. I thought cold turkey would be bad for a short time, I never thought I would step into a personal hell that would last for months and still challenge me today. I am not fully recovered, but I believe I will and you will too. Take care of yourself, slow and steady, be your own best friend and when you can't go on, keep going. Thanks again to you all. You are my friends, for life x
  9. I was on 20mg of seroxat for 3 years to help on the taper of 10mg of Diazepam which was taken for muscle issues for 3 years also.
  10. Hi Michelle, this is so strange but I was only thinking of you this morning bizarrely! I wondered if you would be here as I remember you from PP. I remember you as the lady doing a really slow taper and I remember you doing really well. Well done on coming off Seroxat, you are very brave and your taper schedule has worked well for you. I would love to know a little more about your taper schedule, would you mind sharing? Did you do a 5% taper the whole way through? Did you ever use the liquid at all? Thankyou Michelle and once again well done. :-) (ps I apologise if this post sends twice, the first message I tried to post didnt work)
  11. I am now about 6.5 years post-cold-turkey from Paxil/Seroxat and beginning to see the light at the end of a extremely long and dark-black tunnel. Thanks to some circumstances I did survive but without aome crucial support I probably would not be here anymore... But yes, I feel close to healed though still not free of some nasty symptoms. And after having been unempoyed for about 6 years, I am planning to remume work in the near future. Tapering the right way would probably have saved me from this utter misery but that knowledge came too late for me. So I survived, just as the rest of us here. But OMG what a unbelievable long and dark journey. But still thankful for the (almost) recovery and heading for the rest of my drug-free life!
  12. Interesting, maybe you were talking about me who was told by C that he was recovered after 7 years. I never knew which drug he had taken, always had assumed it was Paxil/Seroxat but apparently it was Prozac. Not the most notorious in terms of excruciating long-term WD I thought, but obviously it can be just as dangerous.
  13. I remember reading posts from Aeroman on his journey from Lexapro and he was very inspiring. It was on another site. I sure would love to read Recovery/Success Stories. Alto you have a success story... I have a friend who sucessfully got of Seroxat (Paxil) and is doing well. Said she feels better now then she ever did. Trying to get her to join this site, but she has been drug free for a year. I will ask her to join the site and post her story Hugs
  14. 2011hope had a successful taper off of Seroxat and is doing fine now. She's drug-free. Her thread is here. "Now I am finally free of the "drug" mill. I went on with the tapering exactly as you told me by cutting and recutting my tablets and it worked out fine." - 2011hope
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