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  1. Hi all! I'm so so happy places like this exist to aid in our recovery! A little background on me - I was prescribed lexapro 10mg August of 2017 after a horrible bout of anxiety. I literally had tried everything under the sun to feel better and I was at the end of my rope, so it seemed like medication was the only option. It felt like a miracle! Within days I felt back to myself and continued to feel great for 4 months - so good in fact that I talked to my doctor about tapering. I had zero withdrawl and felt pretty good until 6 months after starting the taper. My insomnia came back full force and my therapist suggested I start lexapro again since I had such a great experience the first time. WOW... that was a mistake. I had a horrible reaction to lexapro the second time around becoming more and more depressed, feeling disconnected, inner ear ringing, and diarrhea. So after four weeks of feeling awful, I reduced to 5mg and two days later started feeling crazy! Weird vertigo (kinda feeling woozey or like I have sea legs), blurry vision, ringing in my ears, and diarrhea. It's been super terrifying. After a week on 5mg, I decided to stop and have been having the same weird vision and dizziness issues for 3 weeks now. I went to my GP who wants me to go to an ENT to get my inner ears checked. She also started me on thyroid and testosterone hormone replacement since they were both low. My questions is could this be withdrawal even though I was only on lexapro for a month? Could something more serious be going on? Is it just anxiety? I just don't want to get on another drug out of desperation, but I'm starting to feel helpless. 2017- lexapro 10mg + Vistaril (for sleep) 2018 - lexapro 10mg + Vistaril (for sleep)
  2. 10 years ago I started having what I thought were panic attacks diagnosed by my Dr...I was put on 10 mg Lexapro. During the last 10 years I still had the so called attacks but only a few so we assumed the drug was working.....until July 2015 when I had another episode that lasted 4 days... a pulse of 180 that would just not go down...In th ER an attendant looked at the monitor and said casually -oh you have “a-fib”....something I had never heard of..... which convinced me that all those panic attacks were really a-fib attacks...because they all felt the same! Last June 2017 I decided along with my Dr it was time to get off the Lexapro....he told me 6 weeks was long enough to taper off, which I did. During the end of July 2017 I was also in hospital with another a-fib episode.....while there I had what I realize now we’re brain zaps, neck tremors and fuzzy thinking and hard to focus my sight , but attributed them to the cardio medication....the zaps went away, the fuzzy thinking stayed, along with eyesight focus problems.....all of which I thought was brought on by the new medications.....during this time I also experienced insomnia, tinnitus which was off and on until February 2018...since then it has been constant and very annoying. I now listen to “white noise” at night to be able to sleep....I must say my eyesight and fuzzy thinking have somewhat improved the last few weeks...but these brain zaps and the lightheaded feelings are about to get the best of me....I just break down and cry when they happen....but......I will not ever take an antidepressant again! I am so angry at the Dr for ever putting me on that nasty thing when it was not needed.....I am angry and sad for the time it is robbing me from my family....because I just don’t feel good when all this is going on....I keep praying that all this comes to an end soon and I will be able to enjoy my life once more...the last 3 years I have had 2 ablations for the a-fib and since November 2017 I finally started getting my life back from the a-fib problems.....then this withdrawal problem starts....It’s very annoying! I have 4 grandkids that I would love to spend more time with, but I can’t because of these withdrawal symptoms going on right now. I saw my Dr , who is different, today and when I mentioned that I could be experiencing withdrawal from the Lexapro....she looked at me like I was nuts! So here I am tonight wearing a 24-hr holter monitor....then she setting me up an EEG appt and an appointment with ear, nose and throat dr.....I am convinced that there are too many similar symptoms of withdrawal for this to be coincidence.....
  3. Hi, I was on Escitalopram from Sept 2017 to April 2018. Being at high which I was with these drugs, I stopped it cold turkey. Major mistake for sure. In mid of June 2018, I have got anxiety attacks back, severe mood swings. Major loss in confidence. Anxiety has gone down because I'm monitoring my thoughts but the fear has not. There are fear and anxiety about most random tasks, like driving a car which I've been doing from last 10 years, quite odd. I've been mostly stiff physically during my days but have been a bit better, however loss in confidence remains a major worry because that's not me for sure. I asked my psychiatrist, he told me to relax and monitor my thoughts and has given me etizolam but I'm reluctant to take any more meds now. I'm trying a few mindfulness techniques like philosophical meditation(writing Journal), which has helped a bit but this still bugs me all the time. Do let me know if someone else had similar consequences.
  4. My medication history is complicated and in all honesty my memory isnt working all that well. I cant really remember a lot of my medication journey which is a scary thing to admit. Ill do my best to summarise. I started taking diazepam in 2013 i believe. I took it for the sudden onset of panic attacks. To begin with I only used my medication sparingly (and always, always as prescribed). I was seeing a psychiatrist at the time who was trying to help me find an antidepressant to help, however after trying almost all of them, i found nothing worked. At this point my Pdoc agreed it might be wise to take a small dose of clonazepam daily while doing CBT in order to allow me to do the work which would ultimately help me heal. Unfortunately CBT never did help and i remained on a daily dose of clonazepam for about two years. After deciding my clonazepam still wasnt working well enough to help my GAD and panic, i decided to try an antidepressant again. This time i chose escitalopram. I took 10mg and it worked after the first dose. Not many people believe me when i say that, but after trying nearly every other AD available and having absolutely no success, i know it was no placebo effect. I took 10mg for about two months, and i felt pretty good but unfortunately i also felt pretty numb. I decided to quit taking it. I cant remember if i tapered. But i will say i had no issues coming off. I found myself exactly where i left off before starting it. About six months later, i decided to try escitalopram again at a lower dosage, given i was still no better in terms of managing my anxiety. It took longer to work this time around, and in actual fact i wasnt even convinced it DID work the entire next year i was on it (more on that later), but nonetheless i continued to take it. I changed dose almost every week for about three months trying to figure out what dose would be best. I would try 2.5mg one week, 7.5mg the next, 5mg the following. And so on. Eventually i settled on 5mg and remained on that dose for a year. During this year i slowly tapered off my benzodiazapine by cross tapering from cloanzepam to diazepam and then doing a daily microtaper off. I took my final dose of diazepam on the 18th August this year (2017). It was one week later that i decided to quit my 5mg escitalopram cold turkey. I thought i was on a low dose, and i wanted to be off all medication. I wasnt even convinced it ever worked so i thought it would be no big deal. I did okay for the first two months. For the most part I felt really wired. I couldnt stop moving, my thoughts wouldnt slow down. I felt hypomanic in a way. My sleep was terrible, i would bolt awake straight after falling alseep and feel a strange terror and/or rage. I struggled TERRIBLY with restless legs too. At month three is when things started to change. I started to feel really unlike myself. I started to feel disconnected from my surroundings. I would wake up and not know where i was. I started to feel like i couldnt recognize the people in my life i loved the most. And i felt scared of them too. A couple of times out of desperation i took one off doses of my escitalopram only to feel better immediately, or at least by the next day. Im now in month 4 off both drugs and this last week has been the worst week of my life. I have fallen into a deep depression. I dont recognize my life. I dont recognize my house, my pets. Intellectually I know who they are and where i am but emotionally i feel scared of everyone and everything because its all foreign. It doesnt feel like my life. And yet at the same time I feel like im in some sort of time warp where ive travelled back 7 years in time. I'm having intrusive memories of 2010/2011. Not bad ones. Theyre mosly neutral in fact, but the fact that I emotionally feel like its 2010/11 is terrifying me. Its like i cant remember the last 7 years of my life. And its not because i took medication for 7 years. I didnt. I started medication in 2013. I AM SO SCARED AND CONFUSED. Im pushing everyone i love away because im scared and i cant recognize them emotionally. My poor boyfriend. We have been together 6 years and i love him so dearly, but i dont rezognize him. He seems foreign and scary. I have had DP/DR before but this is in a league of its own. Its like its my life, but my life 7 years ago. And im not numb either, which i usually have with DP/DR. Im full of emotion. Ive been crying hysterically because i feel like ive lost my mind. Last week i couldnt take the pain anymore, and i took a 5mg dose of escitalopram. It seemed to fix everything the last few times i tried that tactic. And immediately so. I would usually feel better and immediately regret ever taking the dose and interrupting my withdrawal. But last week it didnt work. Today i had the worst day to date and again i desperately reached for my 5mg of escitalopram. It hasnt worked. Now im sitting here feeling everything i was feeling before i took it and now im even more "out of it" having taken the escitalopram. I know how dangerous it is to randomly take escitalopram here and there. I dont need a scolding. My poor brain is probably so kindled it doesnt know what to do. Im aware of the risks and that ive been playing with fire. It just shows how desperate ive got. Im not sure this post will even make sense. I can barely string my sentences together. The time frames probably dont add up. Im not trying to deceive anyone with time frames for things, im just generally too out of it cognitively to figure it out. My memory is shot anyway. But for the love of god im so scared of my symptoms and i need help desperately. My whole life is unraveling. I dont know who i am and nothing feels the same. I cant remember my life for the last 7 years and thats the worst part. Please can someone help me?? I dont know whats causing these symptoms. Not sure if its just "me" or if its escitalopram withdrawals or if its a horrible wave of my diazepam withdrawals. I thought at four months id be improving but instead im getting worse. much much worse. This cant be normal. Im wondering whether i should try and stabilize on my escitalopram and wait a few months before embarking on a 5% taper. I dont care how long it takes. i just need the pain im feeling now to stop. Please help
  5. Loach

    Loach

    Hey guys, Am I experiencing PSSD, or is it just elevated stress/anxiety? I'll try to sum up the best I can. I received very stressful work news last week, felt like I couldn't handle it (have had moderate anxiety my whole life but nothing debilitating). Made a snap decision to see the doctor, got a Cipralex/Lexapro prescription (first time, haven't done therapy or anything). Took 3 doses of 5mg pills last Sat/Sun/Mon, and stopped due to heightened anxiety, mind racing, constipation, insomnia, and no libido/ED. I took my last dose 8 days ago now (last Monday), and some symptoms have alleviated (not as jittery, stomach is clearing up), but I'm still extra anxious and nothing's happening sexually. Still getting insomnia too. I don't get any erections throughout the day, and I'll sometimes get one in the morning that abruptly disappears. It's almost like it's non-existent down there, there's just nothing. I'm in a long-term relationship so I'm worried, but do you think this added worry + my original stress could be causing this? Let me know, thanks.
  6. I've been looking at this site for a whole month before deciding to reach out and get specific advice about what I'm going through. I was determined to go off my 15 mg of Lexapro this year, not because I had any specific problems on the medication but because I was feeling a little foggy and lazy and wanted to check in with my unmedicated self. I am 22 years old. My very non-plused psychiatrist allowed me to do this and told me I could taper off the medicine by taking 10mg for two weeks and then 5mg for another two weeks. I did this fast taper with unfortunately no guidance other than her (wish so desperately I had come upon this site sooner and done a safe taper). My only symptom while tapering was a sense of disassociation, but after I had my last dose my symptoms rapidly multiplied. The first few weeks without medication were brain zaps, dizziness, vertigo. The nice thing about these symptoms were that they were inconsistent, and I still had not done much withdrawal research so I was determined I could stick them out. I unfortunately rapidly deteriorated after that. My dizziness, vertigo, and nausea became more and more consistent along with horrible feelings of derealization (I felt, and still feel, like I'm not really looking at the world). My stomach began acting up severely. These stomach pains became acute and severe and from the end of April to mid-May I was bedridden with constipation, diarrhea, stomach pain and bloating. I went to a gastroenterologist and had an endoscopy that found mild stomach erosion, possibly unrelated to the withdrawal but I am unconvinced that my stomach pain is not completely related to this small bout of gastritis. Over this time (mid-May to early June) I tried to reinstate three times and failed. Each time I would begin taking 5mg again but after a few days my appetite would disappear completely and I was unable to function. In early June my stomach began to start feeling better and I was left with dizziness and new vision problems. Often my vision felt like it was shaking, visual snow, lots of afterimages, hypersensitive to light. I have also developed terrible headaches, mainly on my temples and where my head and neck meet. My family has a history of bad migraines and I wonder if the lexapro withdrawal has jumpstarted my own migraines. About two weeks ago very bad insomnia set in along with my stomach pain returning in full force. I have little appetite and cannot sleep for long periods of time. My psychiatrist gave me ativan to use as needed and unfortunately I must admit that I have been using it inconsistently this month to help my sleep and anxiety. I definitely do not want to pick up a benzo dependency so have been trying to limit my intake but its difficult when I feel so horrible. My last symptom is a very bad return of anxiety and depression. I wake up many mornings in a near panic attack state, my heart rapidly beating. Chamomile tea has been briefly relieving this but not much. And just generally feeling hopeless. Insomnia has been a real trigger for me and I wish so much I was still getting sleep. My ability at least to have a good night sleep really helped me cope with these other symptoms. Now that this is gone I feel very hopeless about my health. The vision problems are also very difficult, and increase my feelings of disassociation and depression. I wish so badly I could go back in time and do a safe taper. I wonder if anyone thinks trying a reinstatement again might be helpful? Perhaps if I tried a very low dose? I have also read of people switching to Prozac to help elevate these symptoms. I feel so abysmal right now both physically and psychologically, it would honestly not bother me so much to pick up another ssri if it would just allow me to be more functional. Any advice on how to deal with this would be sooo greatly appreciated, please let me know if another attempt to reinstate would possibly work. I had no idea it must possible to feel this bad. I need some hope to help me stop ruminating about all the mistakes I've made on this journey. I know I might be in a wave right now, but its the severest wave I've encountered yet and I need help treading water.
  7. I weened off my Welbutrin and almost done weening off my Lexapro. It took almost a year now but with a lot of time staying at the same dose (could've taken a lot shorter amount of time but procrastinated initiating dosage drop). Just wanted to let everyone know that I used 5 htp to help with withdrawal symptoms (mainly light headedness/ brain flashes). and it really helped. I basically stopped the Welbutrin cold turkey with taking about 200 - 300 mg of 5 htp for about a week then lowering the 5 htp dramatically and that really helped. The lexapro is harder but the 5 htp really helps. I don't come on this website often so I you guys are always already talking about 5 htp sorry for the redundancy. I just felt the responsibility to come on here and let everyone know. I was on Lexapro 20 mg and Welbutrin 300 mg and now I'm off. and my sex drive is back and I feel emotionally fine because they were probably a placebo in the first place. good luck
  8. I’m 27 years old and I have been off lexapro for almost a month now and around week 3 (used for 3-4 years) is when the struggle really began. I have read endless forums for peace of mind. The small manageable things are random headaches manageable with ibuprofen, random brain zaps which are lessening each week, and quick ejaculation during intercourse. The dizziness and zaps have subsided since stopping 5htp during withdrawal. The real struggle is my anxiety and irritability. Small things in the family household tend to flood me with anger quickly to where I want to punch things and I say things I later regret. My fiancée has been supportive but it’s still hard for her to deal with. The anxiety is the other half of the battle. I get heart palpitations randomly that will last through the day with moderate anxiety that is a little short of an impending doom feeling. It leaves me almost not wanting to go out in public and I have never been that way. When I go to the gym I can sometimes feel the heart palpitations in my neck to the point of affecting my cardio. I assume this is just my bad anxiety at times from the withdrawal. The irritability and anxiety are my main battle and sometimes make me feel like I’m losing it although I am always in control. I just need some support in knowing this will pass and will be worth it in the end. I don’t feel depressed just kind of beat down from this battle. Any advice or experience in going through a similar journey would be much appreciated! Researching forums all the time, it’s still hard to find successful stories of people completely off this poison. See my signature for current med regimen!
  9. Hi everyone. Quick intro: Due to a long term dependency on alcohol to self medicate my panic disorder I decided enough was enough had sought detox which in turn led me to my doctor approx 2+ years ago. Since then I (had) been sober until 7 weeks ago where went on an awful bender before ending up in hospital and going into detox again. I have been diagnosed as depressed for over 15 years but I have always been very weary of AD's ... my panic disorder was finally diagnosed around 18 months ago and since then I have had citropram thrown at me briefly before being switch to escitropram which seemed to work wonders I was back working and was busy and happy and less anxious and had the bright idea to taper of because "I" thought I did not need them"... bad idea two weeks after my last dose I started to crash emotionally and physically sometimes ...until I ended up drinking again (briefly) After detox my doctor spoke to me about my experience on escitropram and I told her it gave me bad stomach ache after taking but worked... so she decided to try me of Venzir/Effexor XL 75mg 1 day and I have quit... my nerves lit up like a Christmas tree and the nausea was unbearable and add to that here in the UK we are in the middle of a savage, clammy, humid heatwave... I took it yesterday morning and today I am still suffering extreme nausea and tingling all over still ... ONE pill may have messed me up for a few days ? Does anyone have any experience like this ? It should be well out of my system by now ... it's been 26 hours and its half life is only 16
  10. Hi Y'all, I have been taking an SSRI since 1993 ????. I was prescribed Prozac for Panic D/O. I am now committed to ending my addiction to this poison. Knowing there are many others that are going through the same process is very comforting. I am grateful for this forum and everyone's contributions. With trepidation and hope.
  11. Hi! My name is Erik, i live in Norway and i have been using Escitalopram Activis since December, 19. 2017. I was at 20mgs when i started tapering. I started tapering off the drug a few weeks ago, i went 5 mgs down each time, using about 3-4 days per taper. 2 days ago i quit the medicine alltogether. (Stupid i know). My doctor told me i should use 4-5 weeks per 5 mgs. Today i felt jittery, had some minor brain zaps? (I think, i never understood what the zaps were). Reading online i had found people saying they had quit cold turkey no problem, no stress so i thought it would be ok. Then today i read that you might die from quitting the medicine and that it might induce braindamage. Panicing i found this site and read about reinstating (https://www.survivingantidepressants.org/topic/7562-about-reinstating-and-stabilizing-to-reduce-withdrawal-symptoms/) I decided to start at 5 mgs again and i took a 5 mg pill. I hope i did not make a mistake. I am abit nervous now and feel pretty stupid. I hope i haven't ruined myself. -Erik
  12. My signature should have pertinent info. Essentially, I am not in a great place right now. I've been on 1.5mg (.5 3xday) Clonazepam for the past 3 years. . . and for the past week I've had bad anxiety in the morning. I have teased wanting to get off of it many times. I DO need to get off of it. My main concern is that I ran into severe akathisia/dysphoria earlier in life while tapering a much lower dose. I believe that Lexapro had SOME role in this and perhaps the benzos were/still are just masking this side effect til I got down to a dose where it wasn't. I'm lost as to what my first move should be. I've been given an increased script for 2mg Clonazepam a day, have an appointment with a psychiatrist(I've seen previously) on Monday. . . It SEEMS like I might want to taper off of the Lexapro first, but I am not sure a long taper would suit me. I have yet to take more than 1.5mg Clonazepam a day despite mounting anxiety (particularly bad in the morning) but if I taper off of Lexapro for a year or longer, as so many of you suggest. . . I'll become further dependent on the Clonazepam and may indeed require a higher dose. I desperately want to be off of these drugs, I can handle anxiety. . . I can somewhat handle depression. I cannot handle the dysphoria and severe akathisia I ran into during my last foray into tapering off benzos.
  13. Hello all, I'm new here, and wondering if anyone could provide insight or an opinion. Woud appreciate some of your knowledge. Here it goes: Last year, Jan 2014, I had a bad tmj disorder flare up. Vertigo and all. It caused me horrid anxiety and panic attacks. I couldn't sleep because I kept jolting up when my body started resting. It was awful. The doc prescribed Lexapro, 10mg and Xanax .5mg as needed. I used the Xanax to sleep for about 3weeks, then weaned off when the Lexapro kicked in. After a few weeks, I felt better. A couple of months later, I felt great despite the tmj symptoms. I weaned off over a course of 4 months - June through Oct 2014. I weaned off longer than I was on it. Shortly after, my untreated tmj symptoms got worse, inc horrible vertigo. I started the right treatment, but slumped into a dark depression. Assuming that Lexapro had an easier taper, I asked my doc to prescribe it. I started with 10mg. Three weeks in, I developed tachycardia (only when I'm asleep).This was the beginning of things getting crazy. My doc (Naturopath) wanted to support my wean by having me take seratoflo and dopaflo (they have 5htp in it). I was told to take two sprays as I taper from Prozac. I read incorrectly, and did two sprays twice that day - the first day. Well, I developed serotonin syndrome symptoms. I freaked out, and my anxiety went through the roof. Ended up in ER. I requested to see a Pscyh (I've never met with one). The Psych told me to get off Prozac and prescribed 12.5mg of Zoloft and Zyprexa, which was a huge concern for me as I am not bipolar. He described it as a mood stabilizer. I took it a few times, but was too afraid to continue. The 12.5 Zoloft did nothing except make me jittery. The tachy just became a constant at suring sleep as well. I was on it for 10 days, and wasn't sure if I should go up or go a different path. I read that Zoloft was just as activating as Prozac, which I just don't do well with. I found a new Pscyh (a more thorough one) who suggested I just go back to Lexapro since it worked before, and stay on it while I see a therapist to talk about my stress issues (it's why I got tmj disorder). I am on day 5. The first two days I started with 2.5. I'm now on .5mg - for 7 days. I'm supposed to go up to 10mg afterwards. I was also given Ativan 5mg to take as needed. Now ... I still have tachy. It comes on in my sleep every hour or two. Last night, I had to take Ativan because I desperately need sleep, but I'm so worried about benzos. My anxiety yesterday was through the roof. The anxiety seems to happen only when I'm at rest. When I'm trying to relax and watch TV, my body is in full terror. It's horrible. It's awful. I've also been feeling a few brain zaps? (Could it be the Prozac?) Anyway guys, wondering if guys could shed some light on my current path. I guess I destabilzed? I just want this horrid anxiety to chill out. The doc thinks the tachy will go away, but that it was due to the Prozac.
  14. Hello this is where am at. I was on lexpro for a total of 6 weeks. Started at 10 and went to 20mg. Was in on bus par for 4 weeks before that. I should have never started this stuff!!! My pharmisit said to taper by going to 10 mg for a week than 10 mg every other day for a week. Well my last dose was may 17. That first week after I stopped I felt great. Since than I started with worse anxity no interst in the regular things I used to like. My back hurts sometimes. Can’t concentrate and anything. I know this was not the way to come off but I did not know. When I was on lexpro it did not help but thought it was making me feel worse. Please give me some encouraging ideas that might help. Thanks Jim
  15. ponsrock

    ponsrock: Lexapro

    Dear all, today is March 16, 2018 and i am doing a chronicle/diary of process of FINALLY stopping LEXAPRO. ———————— i have been on lexapro since october 2012.... on and off. When i tried stopping, the symptoms of depression and anxiety would return after 4 months that i would return to using the drug. It has happened for three cycles. from october 2017 to december 2017, i have been taking 1/2 tab once to twice per week. I felt symptom free. December 16, 2017 was my last dose. I DECIDED TO BREAK FREE. january 2018 was easy. I didn’t feel any symptoms of withdrawal. february 2018. My mood swings started going wild. Mornings were the worst and things would improve come 6pm. Some days were worse. I would meditate daily to manage this.... i feel brain foggy at times. I felt i was speaking much slower than before. I i tried speaking at the same speed, i would stammer. This wasn’t normally the case before SSRI’s. March 2017.... i read The Mood Therapy book and seems to be helping me. The days of mood swings are still there and I have days where focus is difficult to achieve. Sometimes i read some paragraphs in a book thrice to five times just to understand what it means... FOCUS FOCUS!!! anyway, i will keep this journal regular.....
  16. Hello all- i just want to introduce myself to the group. I have been a long time reader and follower. I just decided to create account. I will be totally honest.\ Back in 2014 Started using steroids to enhance my body building. I never used before but all my coworkers used them and so i started a 8 week cycle. After stopping them and going through the whole post cycle therapy, i started to experience what i did not know at the time was anxiety attacks for no apparent reason. Please note i never had panic or anxiety attacks before. On July 4, 2014 i experienced a full panic attack while sitting down watching TV. This panic attack felt like i was going to die! I was short of breath, sweating, dizzy, like i was about to faint. Right after that attack i was not the same. I felt the after effects. i was scared to have another one, i had brain fog, anxiety, Depersonalization, suicidal thought which scared me to my wits. I became depressed because i didn't know what was wrong with me. I stayed that way for two days, until i went to urgent care. I was given a injection and calmed down for the rest of the day. I was sent home with xanax, and instructions to see a Psychiatrist. Once i seen the doctor she diagnosed me with GAD. Wrote me prescription for Escitalopram 10mg, and xanax 0.25mg as needed. I started taking the Escitalopram 10 mg at night and immediately couldn't sleep, had racing thoughts, and was more anxious. Next day she instructed me to take it in the morning. That seem to do work better than taking it at night. Eventually my symptoms were gone except that i was tired alot and my libido was down. She prescribed me Bupropion SR 150 which i made me feel like my mind was going 100 mph. I stopped Bupropion SR 150 and she switched me to Bupropion Xl 150 and then 300 mg which combated the tiredness. At this dose of Bupropion XL i had motivation, my libidio returned, and my energy level improved. Fast forward to last year November 2016 when i decided i want to give it a shot and taper off lexapro first. With my doctor agreeing with me, i started to cut the 10 mg pill into 4 pieces. I weaned myself down to the point that i couldn't cut the 5mg pills to get a accurate dose. That's when i researched on SAD on how turn Escitalopram into a liquid form. See my signature for my tapering doses. Recently my employer started restructuring the company, Unsure of my future i started interviewing and testing for other potential employers. During the interviews i was so nervous i took 0.25mg xanax to calm me down. This was last month in August 2017. My latest taper was on August 14, 2017 i was at 0.7mg and reduced to 0.6mg/1.2ml - 2:1 ratio of Escitalopram. During on of the testing for this new job i was on the verge of having a panic attack. Not sure why since i was not nervous nor worried about the testing portion. I had no choice but to push through since we could not leave the room at all! I managed to finish the test but i was not feeling to good, so i took 0.25mg of Xanax which helped. After the testing episode i have been noticing that when i go into a important meeting i start to panic. i get dizzy, sweaty, and anxious. I feel like i want to run out of there. It got to the point that before one certain interview with a potential employer i have taken 0.125mg of xanax to get through it. And after all that i actually go the job! I decided to return to my latest dose i felt i was stable at which was 0.7mg/1.4ml of Escitalopram in liquid form. I increased my dose on September 10, 2017 I was hoping this will help. I was ok for 3 days until i had to make more liquid Escitalopram with distilled water. I bought some 10ml bottles so just in case i have to travel i have a small enough jar or vial to carry around. So after this mixture the new ratio will be 1:1. I crushed two 5mg pill of Escitalopram and added 10ml of distilled water. After a couple of hours i took my dose at 0.7ml = 0.7 mg 1:1 ratio. I am not sure what happened but maybe the powder that sits at bottom didn't have enough space to properly mix with the water, because right after i took this dose i was on the verge of having a panic attack and i haven't been the same since. I had to do breathing techniques. That worked for like 15 minutes but i was very irritated, i couldn't stay still, i had racing thoughts coming into my head, heart was pounding, i felt dizzy. I had to take 0.25mg to calm down to be able to sleep. i woke up around 1100pm the same night and felt anxious and i took a extra 0.125 mg of xanax again to fall asleep. I had to call in sick to a golf tournament with my new boss, and some clients. Now ever since then i have been on edge, i feel ok one moment and the next, i am anxious, i get racing thoughts, my left eye is twitching a lot. i worry that i won't be able to perform at my new job which is very demanding. Yesterday i did my original mixture of Escitalopram 2:1 ration in a slightly larger jar and i took my dose at 1.4ml/0.7mg of Escitalopram and bupropion xl 300 mg. I did not have the same episode i did the previous night. I this point i don't know what to do. Should i stay at my current dose and try to stabilize, lower my dose, ??? your help and input is much appreciated. Thanks
  17. When91

    When91 lexapro

    Mudar para portuguêsFull screen closeI started using ssri in 2006 at age 14, however not always wore often used day in day not until September 2014 are already nine months ... right after I have stopped the use abruptly barely stayed for about a month, however after that I felt very well, very well, I thought q was healed, however a few days later returned it, two months later went to a party drank was barely even not drinking too much and the next day tava was better to eat a pizza and soon after started have severe pain in the gut and much much weakness, one week later I improved a little, one month after I came to feel again, however a little less intense, and improved again, however one month after I started to have arrhythmias that in Portuguese in medicine call extra systoles, it seems q heart will stop ... after a few weeks decreased intensity. in the new year was well drank got sick but improved then had fun on the beach ... weighed 85 kg this epoca..tenho 1,83m ... like my body was one of the few things q I had in me made me q well, at least help me with women ... used to do exercises outdoors ... however after a little while my nervous system began to show signs of failure and could not keep pace, and the TBM physical symptoms got worse and my body and muscles are desfezeram ... in two months I lost 15 kg, this was one of the worst things q happened to me ... right after I tried to recover but no point in, trained but the body or the nervous system not recovered until I saw that was useless to try ... it made me very badly why always imagined what I lost, especially the body ... now I do not have 1/3 of force q had no body even make hiking and so I speed makes me feel bad !! I never in my life imagined that one remedy would cause me so much misfortune, and I'm only 24, today is my aniverssario, but I'm not to celebrate, I can not drink with friends, I can not exalt me ​​emotionally, to fight with my parents and my cousin died have limited time, the withdrawal from lexapro not let me do anything at that age I wanted this living alone without my parents, however the Brazilian economy is very bad, and so'll be for a few years at least, I would have to have a job that pays well to support myself, go out for fun is also complicated, I am with the effects of the recession and also here is very violent, when I walk down the street can not relax, gotta look pros sides and always avoid certain streets, if they come to Brazil Please carefully ... I am now 70 kg with no power, with arrhythmias (danger but has not bothered), and already have nine months I stopped, and my parents did not believe in me that caused it lexapro and despair ...
  18. I am looking for some advice or reassurance. ---For 8 years, I was on Lexapro (most of the time at 10mg and 15 mg for last year). I tried many times to taper off of it but the anxiety was too crushing and I never got far. --However, in Dec 2013 I was prescribed a remedy by a homeopath that completely wiped out the anxiety. As soon as the feelings of generalized anxiety (heart, palpitations, knot in stomach) were gone, the Lexapro felt completely too stimulating to take and I literally gained 12 lbs in a week. (My weight has been stable for over 15 years.) --So, I began to taper in January dropping 2.5 mg every couple weeks. It has been a rough ride down to 0mg at the end of May. I've now been off Lexapro for 3 months and have worked through the symptoms of anger, dizziness, de-presonalization, stomach pains, hypoglycemia, etc. with a combination of cell salts, homeopathy, supplements, EFT, meditation, yoga, and generally trying to take it easy. --However, I am still not feeling completely well. I get lightheaded, have diarrhea, and experience anxiety now (again) in waves and even had a couple panic attacks. I get cortisol surges at night in mid-dream that wake me up with my heart racing. On bad nights, I could up every 45 minutes. (Vit C and Seriphos has helped but makes me feel not so great the next day.) I am eating a low histamine diet as well. QUESTIONS - Is this a normal place to be symptom-wise for 3 months post last pill? Was my taper too fast? Where do you guess I am in the progression toward homeostasis? A year away? More? Less? What else can I do to hasten the recovery? My kids and husband have been very sympathetic but I feel terrible that we are missing out on so much. We have a trip planned in November and I just can't cancel that, too. Thank you for your help. Reading these boards over the last few months have been inspiring, consoling and generally wonderful, as I don't know anyone IRL who has gone through this. It's a lonely place to be.
  19. Hello! I have been on Lexapro for one solid year, most of the year was 10mg but just increased the dose in March (2 months ago) to 20mg. It has helped my anxiety an extreme amount but unfortunately due to an insurance issue, I was not able to fill my last prescription. It has been four days of being Lexapro free and the withdrawals are HERE. My biggest concern with them currently is the foggy brain as I work every day with children with autism.. lets just say, I have to be very quick on my toes with these kiddos! I am also experiencing brutal headaches, trouble with sleep and a huge loss of appetite. I am pretty terrified for the extreme anxiety and panic attacks to return but so far that's a missing symptom (thank goodness). I began to google and its a real scary place to be. I have read horrible and terrifying things about being on this drug as well as the process of stopping it. I would love to live my life anxiety free but that is something i gave up on a long time ago. It's apart of who I am and learning how to manage it and all I can do. I guess I just want some hope that I can get through this cold turkey? If the anxiety stays calm, I can tough through the rest of the withdrawals. If anyone has a positive story of quitting cold turkey, I am all ears and would LOVE to read all about it. I also was hoping for some advice on steps I should take next. Any vitamins that help these withdrawals? I also would like some clues on what to expect over the next few weeks/months. Will my anxiety return with a vengeance?
  20. Hi, First time here. I will try to make this a short story. I don't know what or how much to share. Desperate for your thoughts and guidance. I have been on a multitude of antidepressants for 20 plus years, having tried unsuccessfully to stop but each time returned to the same or yet another RX. Diagnosed M.Depressive Disorder/Anxiety/A.D.H.D. For years I got my prescriptions from my Internist, who originally prescribed me anti-depressants. It took over a year for her to convince me to do so, then I held onto them for dear life. (I was about a year-and-half-sober (alcohol) and didn't want to rely on any more artificial substances but eventually succumbed. Sometimes, I was on a combination of drugs. Fast Forward. At Dr.'s request, went to psychiatrist. She didn't immediately try to put me on yet another pill, which was refreshing. First did thyroid T3? Then I tried Lamictal and had a horribly adverse reaction as I was titrating up on this medication. I am not a violent person and guns scare me, but I thought about getting one. I also had depersonalization? So very scary. This and a subsequent adverse reaction to an antibiotic (3 days in the E.R. thousands of dollars of tests--I believe it was neurotoxicity--made me want to eliminate all medications. After over a year of slowly reducing medications, I was off Escitalopram 20mgs and had reduced Adderall XR from 25mg to 10mg, however, the anxiety was so great and I just didn't fully understand the Adderall withdrawal process. (I hadn't found your site yet) I went back on Escitalopram 5mg. This began in mid-February. Again, I tried to eliminate both meds. In June, I crossed over from Adderall XR 5mg to Immediate Release and was on liquid Escitalopram 3.75mgs when, I started having horrible nightmares/P.T.S.D. It was unbearable. At Psychiatrist request, went back on Adderall XR mg and eventually to Escitalopram 5mg. She also prescribed Minipress (off-label) for nightmares. 4 days of this was hideous. Horrible anxiety. Discontinued and was given Wellbutrin XR 150mg. I believe this was to help with the side-effects of going back up on the Escitalopram which now seemed to produce horrible anxiety. I'm not sure if this was due to the liquid form and/or possible because I changed forms of Adderall and didn't stabilize before reducing the Escitalopram. Four days of Wellbutrin was shear hell. I have been plagued with suicidal thoughts before but while on Wellbutrin, the overwhelming nature of these thoughts was terrifying. Wellbutrin was eliminated and I was next prescribed Hydroxyline 25mg up to 8 times a day to reduce the overwhelming anxiety. This was about a month ago. There are overwhelming events in my life. True. But I don't know if the Hydroxyline is contributing to these. I have been suicidal and my anxiety is exponential (numbness in my body, chest pounding, blood-pressure up, virtually paralyzed) Today in desperation, I again went to see the psychiatrist. She has given me Gababentin. I just took 100mg tablet and am terrified. I cannot explain how much it feels as though I have failed. As a person in recovery, I tried to stop drinking multiple times without success. Each time feeling worse about myself when I drank again. After almost, almost eliminating RX's I am now supposed to take Escitalopram 10mg (which I have done for approximately 7 days..I had been on 7.5mg) Adderall XR 5mg has been consistent about a month and a half. And I have just put another pill in my mouth to alleviate the heightened anxiety. After reading some of the things about Gababentin on your site, I don't know what to do. I realize my system is totally confused and that you cannot tell me what to do, but I feel like a science experiment. I was told that some people have to be on medications their whole lives but I don't want to be one of them. I have been on anti-depressants for over half of mine and I didn't fully realize the price that I have paid. I started Lexapro when it first came out and then went to the generic form. My brain was once my thing but I have felt stupid for years. My brain just wouldn't work. I could not find the right word, my short term memory seemed non-existent and I have felt like a zombie. Again, please forgive the length of this post. I just feel so very alone.
  21. Hi everyone! I am new here, and for the past almost week I have been reading all of this invaluable information and learning so much. My journey goes back to June 2016 when after a jaw surgery that wouldn't heal I found my self extremely stressed not sleeping due to pain and overwhelmed which forces my Dr to offer me a script for citalopram 10mg to get me through my trying time. My Dr said to give it 6 months and then I could wean off. The meds worked like a charm and I breezed through the 6 months and came off with a few brain zaps and a few headaches for a couples weeks and then it was done. Skip forward to June 2017 when I wound up catching strep throat from my son which ended with a script for antibiotics and a horrid case of c. Diff as a result of antibiotics. Again my health anxiety shot through the roof and my Dr once again offered a ssri to get me through. This time escitalopram 10mg the med worked well without any side effects I was on them from June 2017 - February 2018 when I decided to taper off I went as my Dr suggested from 10mg to 5mg over about 10 days and then went off. I began to feel crummy stomach problems, looser stool (sorry tmi) nausea. I called my Dr she told me to go back on a small dose to see if the symptoms went away, which I went on 2.5mg and the symptoms went away. I stayed on 2.5mg for about 10 days and again went off. I did good from the end of Feb- mid April. Looking at my journal I was off almost 11 weeks. And then once again symptoms restarted GI type (not sure if that's a common thing after ssris) reflux/heartburn type symptoms, fatigue, and some increasing anxiety. 2 days ago I called my Dr and she recommends I start back on 10 mg of citalopram. I took 5mg of citalopram today. But am worried if I should continue, what is the best way to proceed? Should I continue on with citalopram or should I try to power through off of meds? Any suggestions? Thank you in advance.
  22. Hello, I did a relatively quick taper from Lexapro using 1 mg per week water titration from 10mg with my final dose mid-November. Acute withdrawals lasted a couple weeks then subsided. Around Christmas the weeping and depression set in with a vengeance. At the same time insomnia started. I could not sleep unless I took 50mg of Seroquel. i am still battling the insomnia but ironically last night I slept 7 hours without having to take meds. Today is my 5th day of reinstatement on 5mg of Lexapro. Seroquel as stopped a week ago and replaced with Ambien, which I have not taken for 2 days. The insomnia is taking it's toll on me. My T3 thyroid is starting to go low, I am having cold temperature intolerances, hair is falling out, strange "feelings" in my hands and legs from time to time, and inability to relax or make myself comfortable. It's like I am always in a restless state. Since I have reinstated the weird feeling in my hands and legs are subsiding and are more flair up in nature. I felt relaxed when I woke up this morning and when I layed down last night. I do have the typical startup anxiety/tiredness that is all too familiar. the head fog is very bad also. How long will I know whether or not this reinstatement is going to work? Also, how long should I stay at 5 mg before I go to 10 mg and plan to hold there? I did not want to reinstate but the insomnia will put me to an early grave if I do not get it under control. Dr. Shipko's blog also scared the crap out of me. If I would have read that back at the end of last year, I would have never goin off in the first place.
  23. Hello I've come across this site whilst trying to find some reassurance to help me get through this hell. I was put on AD when I was 14 (now 33) for adolescent anxiety and depression. I have been on one form of AD or another since. I've failed many times in the past timing off these drugs, not handling the symptoms and ending up going back on a full dose. I've lost count how many of those years I have been on Escitralopram but that is the drug I'm now withdrawing from. I used the liquid to taper off slowly over the last year. I got down to 1mg and just over two weeks ago was the last time I took it. For a few days I felt OK but after about 4 days the evil head shocks began. They have continued along with feeling disconnected from myself, irritable, tired, tearful, dizzy and very low. The Dr said I could push on through or go back on them! I want to beat this because my husband and I would like to try for a baby. I've been "pushing on through" but my anxiety is getting worse. I feel on edge and keep having panic attacks. I've also had a one sided headache/migraine for the last 5 days. The Dr has prescribed a beta blocker to help with the anxiety but I'm scared to take something else. I've battled health anxiety as long as I can remember and with stopping AD I'm experiencing so many physical symptoms and getting very frighten. Trying to work out its is withdrawal or something is wrong with me!? Can anyone offer any advice or guidance on how to get through this. Are headaches/migraines withdrawal symptoms? I've read some posts on here that it can effect your heart? I'm now terrified something is going to happen to me. I'm so scared and lost and don't know where to turn ???? Thank you for reading if you got this far. I hope someone can help me.
  24. Hello, I am 24 years old, and am currently going through what I think are Lamictal withdrawals. My story is rather long and complicated, so I will try to sum it up as best I can. If anyone wants me to explain anything further, I can do that as well. I was diagnosed Bipolar II in 2010 at 18 yeara old, and was prescribed Lexapro, Seroquel, Vyvanse, and Klonopin. I immediately felt like a zombie, and stopped taking everything but the Lexapro. Fast forward to May of 2016, I am only on 5mg of Lexapro now and feeling rather depressed. My new psychiatrist wants to try a mood stabilizer (I have always fought against doctors wanting to add new drugs to my cocktail). Unfortunately, my parents convinced me that a new pill would be the answer, and I started up on 25mg of Lamictal. For two weeks I took that and felt alright, a slight improvement I guess. Two weeks later I bumped up to 50mg and started noticing a decent improvement, but also some pretty noticeable side effects. Two weeks later, I upped the dose to 100mg, and the next day felt absolutely horrible. I got terrible flu like symptoms, rash on my hands and feet, swollen glands, spread throat, stomach pains, etc. I went to the hospital and they said it was just a virus. I continued to take 100mg of Lamictal. Two days later, the rash had now spread to my whole body and was extremely itchy. I went back to the ER, and again they said it was just a virus and had nothing to do with Lamictal. I took it upon myself to stop taking 100mg that day (June 5, 2016). The rash went away almost immediately, but the withdrawal symptoms were unbelievably overwhelming so I reinstated 50mg three days later when I couldn't take it anymore. I stabilized for two weeks on 50mg, until I got yet another itchy rash, this titem accompanied with a very dizzy headache and a lot of cognition problems. I stopped cold turkey again, and made it three days before needing to reinstate 25mg as the withdrawal was too much to handle. I then stayed on 25mg for a week (still feeling absolutely horrible the whole time). I experienced insomnia (jerked myself awake every time I was about to fall asleep), rapid heart beat, extreme anxiety, worse depression then I've ever had before, zero appetite (lost 13 pounds and am already underweight), dizziness, terrible brain fog, confusion, memory loss, dp/dr, shakiness under the skin, back and neck pain, extreme fatigue, bouts of crying, extreme anger, and much more. After trying to stabilize at 25mg for that week, both my pDoc and GP told me just to stop the 25mg as it wasn't making anything better and I was past the worst of it. They also prescribed me 2 weeks of Klonopin as I basically hadn't slept the past week. I took my last pill of Lamictal on July 1, 2016. It's now been two weeks since taking my last pill, and I'm not sure if I feel any better. One moment I feel alright and think I can push through, the next minute I feel like it's going to last forever and I should reinstate a small dose and try to stabilize there first. Then I think I've already made it through 14 days with no pills, and my symptoms are not nearly as bad as they were when I was taking 25mg of Lamictal at the end of the taper. The first week after stopping Lamictal I felt rather depressed, but somehow still hopeful that things would get better. I still had a very rapid heart rate, trouble sleeping, dizziness, and feeling generally uneasy, but it wasn't too bad at all. This second week has been somehow harder though, and I feel like I don't know what to do. I am now pretty dizzy all the time, my loss of appetite is back, and I usually feel pretty depressed and hopeless about the future. I also have almost no interest in anything that used to bring me happiness. It's getting somewhat overwhelming and I don't know what to do anymore. Should I just keep fighting? Both my mother and my pDoc think that I should keep pushing through and eventually things will get better. I want to believe that but I feel like my hope is fleeting me each day that I wake up and feel the same. I also am very addicted/dependant on Marijuana, and use it to sleep, eat, stop anxiety, feel better, etc. However, after this whole issue whenever I smoke it makes everything a million times worse. Unfortunately, when I don't smoke, all I can think about is smoking pot and that it will make me feel better. So I then proceed to smoke, feel worse, and then painfully sober up until I go through the whole process again. I want to stop smoking altogether, and have tried hundreds of times, but have never made it more than a few days before I feel like I'm losing my mind. I was taking .25mg of Klonopin 2x/day these past two weeks, but have decided to stop that now as I don't want to become dependant on it. I have also been meditating, eating healthy (when I do eat), trying to stay positive, trying to exercise and stay busy, got myself on a sleep schedule, and want to start taking some supplements. None of these things I was doing before all of this. I also scheduled an appointment with a talk therapist (as I feel I have some deep rooted issues causing my anxiety/depression) and with a Neurofeedback Center (in hopes of lessening my anxiety/depression, reducing pot addiction, and resetting my brain to its natural state). If anyone could offer any insight or advice or experience with anything I've been going through I would be extremely grateful. Right now I have so many concerns I don't even know where to start. Should I continue pushing through the Lamictal withdrawals in hopes the symptoms will reside soon? Should I reinstate any amount of Lamictal to stop the withdrawals symptoms? But couldn't that cause worse symptoms like it did when I was on Lamictal in the first place? Should I keep taking the Klonopin to help with anxiety/sleep or should I stop? Should I just cold turkey stop or try and taper down the Klonopin? Is it possible to already be dependant on Klonopin after only two weeks? I feel as though I may be dependant on it to sleep. Sorry for the long post, I'm not sure if that's alright, but I've been holding this in for a while and am not really sure where else to turn.
  25. Hi! English is not my native language and I apologise in advance. Started cipralex 20mg in 2013 and i ended the treatment in february 2017 total of 4 years. I did a quick taper of 2 weeks. Immediate symptoms: Brain zapps/body zapps, crippling anxiety and depression, could not leave bed literally for 2 weeks. For me the biggest problem were the brain zapps/body zapps wich are still ongoing. The zapps lasted every single second for 7 weeks (with an exception will explain later in post) it never stoped it kept me up at night and when I fell asleep these zapps would wake me up. I was sure my life was over as it did not seem to stop and if it would have lasted longer I would most likely have ended it. I am sure allot of you here can rellate to this. For the first time in my life I had become suicidal. So what temporarily cured it? Running did, within 10-15 seconds of starting to run they went away. And immediately came back a few seconds after I stoped running. So I was running twice a day morning and evening and rest of the day i was walking, all day long i stayed mobile it was the only way I could get some sort of relief from these horrendous zapps. So my advice for anyone who might experiencing this for temporal relief is to get your pulse and heartrate up and really get going. As I said wile I was running it cured the zapps 100%. For referance I am a long time runner for many years running 80km/50miles a week +. And as fast as these zapps came it suddenly stoped being constant and I got a few an hour, then less and less. They are still here gets worse at evening and less at middle of the day. Lack of sleep,anxiety and being in a depressed mood triggers it. Also if I keep focusing on these symptoms they get worse. By staying active and distracting myself and training for around 2 hours a day keeps these zapps at a minimal. But they come and go and are really unpredictable. Its been 6 month and my brain still does not feel right, in all honesty I feel like I might have gotten some sort of brain damage,at times I can literally feel pain inside my head a wery uncomfortable feeling. Like the brain is waking up after many years of being in a sleep and is struggling to keep up. But I try not to think of that and try to make my life as best as possible living in the moment keep training and hoping all these strange head sensations will go away some day. My doctor and my psychologist have never had any of their patient complain about these symptoms. My psychiatrist whos been in the business for 30 years has never had a single patient mention this to him and he had only heard about these so called brain zapps. And basicly every health proffesionall I have seen about this say the same thing, that it is some sort of stress response and it will pass soon..... Lets hope for the best.
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