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  1. I went off of my Zoloft 50 mg of 4.5 years old turkey in Jan. Stupid stupid mistake. It ruined my cns. I had 10 days of extreme withdrawl in March which I’m still stuck in. It made my cns not fight any toxins off anymore. We lost our home and all processions bc I was dx with mold toxicity and there was mold in my home. My week of withdrawl started me waking up weak, then falling over, dizzy, then sweating hands and feet racing heart then a night of electric shocks all through my body up into my brain. During this time I quit sleeping all together. No feeling of sleep. Went to the er two times second time they said o maybe you’re panic is coming back take Ativan. Was on that for a month .5 mg and they took me off ct. didn’t sleep for the whole 2 months I was off of it. Now on 1 mg at night barely works for me to sleep 2 hours on off light sleep. I am so very weak it ruined my gut even more than it was before I cannot absorb and digest anything or even have a bm bc I have lost all nerve sensation in my stomach and most of my body. It’s made my blood pressure low, my temperature not regulate. I never feel relaxed at all, not in fight or flight just nothing at all. I don’t sweat, my mouth is so dry my teeth are deteoriating. And mold or toxins I come in contact with engulfs me. My hairs falling out. It’s absolutely hell. And knowing I did this to myself. I knew I needed to heal my gut and thought the Zoloft was only hurting me. Now idk if there’s any hope to repair my damaged cns at all. I have memory loss loss of function to do tasks. I don’t tolerate any foods but 5 things bc all of the infections in me took over and are eating me alive. I can’t take any supplements to get rid of parasites and candida. I hear honking horns esp when toxins are high around me. I see flashing lights. Can’t listen to music or watch tv. I wish I wouldn’t have ever stopped taking it at all. My life was so much better on it. I had no idea this could happen this severe. Someone told me to try a castor oil pack on my spine to try to rebuild something. Thanks for reading
  2. HopingForRelief


    Hi there, I am new to this site after trying to find an explanation for the symptoms I was/am experiencing after a CT from Paxil at 30mg. I want to thank all of the frequent posters in these forums as many of the success stories and positive encouragement have helped me through this horrific experience so far. My story (I apologize if it is long): I started taking Lexapro (10mg) in 2012 (when i was around 18 years old) for continuing panic attacks and debilitating anxiety/OCD. I needed the medication to function at that point and within a few months I was back to myself and living a happy life. Throughout my entire time on Lexapro, while still having some presence of anxiety, I was definitely "normal" and living a happy life that I currently wish I could go back to. Around Nov 2018 I was switched from Lexapro to Paxil at what I now know was a way too fast change and heavy dosage amount (I just stopped taking the lexapro one day and started on Paxil 30mg the next day). The Paxil worked for my anxiety, but it also caused these weird body jerks as I would attempt to go to sleep that scared the crap out of me. Also worth noting: I take my AD before bed, and I would experience a weird sort of brain zap and "cold brain" whenever I exercised the next day, but this would go away when I would take my next pill. Obviously these symptoms really scared me (mainly the body jerks at night), so I foolishly stopped the Paxil CT in May 2019 and said enough was enough. The next few weeks I experienced mainly brain zaps and flu-like symptoms, but nothing unbearable and I had an idea that was to be expected. These went away and for the next three months, aside from heavy dreaming at night, I was totally fine. Then, in September, I got hit like a truck with crazy unexplainable symptoms. These symptoms are: waves of panic that feel different from my original anxiety/panic, OCD about symptoms and thoughts, feeling disconnected from the world around me, phantom smells (it is always the same burning smell), insomnia, vivid and whacky dreams, horrible ringing in my ears and head (almost feels like an electric current), weird burning/shivering of my brain, and more. These were so debilitating to me I left my job and am currently unable to function. They have now relentlessly continued for over a month, and I am not experiencing any "windows" where I feel better. Maybe I will get relief for minutes/to hours of one day over the course of a week. I have tried reinstating (per my doc) a different AD, Luvox, at a low dosage of 25mg and have been taking this for 3 weeks, but I have not noticed a difference one way or the other in my symptoms. What can I do next to help me? I was not experiencing any terrible W/D symptoms for 3 months so by then it was apparently too late for reinstatement to work. Now I also feel like I am "stuck" on the Luvox that is not helping as I have taken it long enough for my body to get accustomed to it. I am not functioning and am taking a huge toll on my mother who is taking care of me currently. We cannot continue financially at this rate with me no longer taking in an income, but I literally cannot work in this capacity. She also believes that I need to take a higher dosage of AD to help myself, so she will not continue supporting me unless I do so. I understand her stance as she doesn't want to see me in this state and doctors tell her that is the "cure" to all of this. I am at a loss on what to do. Would there be any hope if I tried reinstating Paxil? Am I stuck like this forever? I cannot continue ruining my life and living in my house like this. Please, any help would be much appreciated. Thank you for taking the time to read this.
  3. Hi everyone. I've been browsing this site for a couple of years and thought I'd finally join. I'd love to be able to talk with others about what I'm going through. I'm only 22 but I've pretty much been through every hell imaginable in terms of SSRI use (I started when I was 5--not by choice, obviously). It really frustrates me because I never even chose myself to go on these medications, I had very bad tantrums and anxiety as a small child and a psychiatrist put me on them. As I got older, instead of being told to get therapy and try getting off them, she just kept raising the dosage. By age 12 I was on the maximum dose even though my problems weren't that severe. I remember being in middle school gaining weight, feeling tired CONSTANTLY, just not feeling like a kid at a ll, and at the time no one thought that the medication could be the reason for it. It's so upsetting because I feel as though my entire life up until this point has been taken from me and Ill never experience what it's like to be young and happy. Like I said I never showed depressive symptoms before the medication but as the dose was raised I would occasionally get depression symptoms. When I was 15/16 I was switched to celexa which actually "worked" quite a bit better for me, I lost a lot of weight and felt energetic and motivated, but by the time I was 18 I really wanted off of these drugs that weren't even my choice to go on. However, as I learned the hard way psychiatrists don't have a good understanding of what's required for a successful taper. I was then on 40mg, and she lowered it all the way to 30, and then quickly after that to 20. This all happened right before I went away to university for the first time, so it was just horrible timing. My first month of college I noticed I began to feel severe chest pain. I didn't know what was happening and it was very scary. My entire freshman year I essneitllay spent in severe burning pain all across my chest and upper back. I would be doubled over crying for much of the day because of the pain. I went to see SO many doctors about it but they all said I was perfectly healthy and it must be from anxiety or just 'in my head'. I had to leave college after my first year because of the pain. By this point I was completely off of the celexa because I didn't know what was happening and I thought the pain was being caused solely by the drug itself. But the pain didn't get any better, it got worse. I basically spent the next 3 years (not an exaggeration) bedridden crying in pain. I cannot even describe in words how severe the pain was. And the problem was no one even considered that it was due to withdrawal because every doctor I went to said no, withdrawal wouldn't cause pain like that. So it was just a constant 'search' to figure out why I was having this mysterious pain. Even when I went back on the celexa to see if it would help, it wouldn't get rid of the pain, but I believe that's because (as I later found), the only way to get rid of it is by going on the HIGHEST possible dose because that's the highest dose my body was accustomed to. Finally last year I tried Zoloft out of desperation (I was missing my whole youth...I feel like my situation is a lot different because I spent 18-21 bedridden in pain. I know I could "wait it out" a few more years...but I'm missing my entire youth, a period fo my life I won't get back, and I don't know how much longer my college is going to let me take time off. I should have already graduated by now :(. It's so painful to be in so much pain while other people your age are having the time of your lives.) So even though I hate these medications, I tried Zoloft in a desperate attempt to just be out of pain and be able to move forward with my life. By the time I reached 150mg my pain went away completely (after 4 months on it), but of course I have other side effects on it I do not like like loss of creativity (I want to be a musician, and I love art), not feeling emotions as deeply, and almost feeling like your'e living life in a fog. To be blunt I don't feel "myself" on it. My individual spark is gone. But, I was just so desperate to get rid fo the physical pain. Anyway I made a freaking stupid decision in May to go off of it. At this point me and my doctors still didn't 100% make the connection between the pain and withdrawal, it was just a 'theory'. I thought my pain could have lessened because I had a boyfriend and friends now, was in school, feeling better, was out of pain to the point I was exercising consistently, etc. Well, nope lol. All of my pain returned this month. I'm back to being in bed with pain I'm in a huge dilemma because I know from past experience the pain DOES NOT go away. It's weird because I don't have any mental symptoms from going off the medication. I don't feel any more anxious/depressed/etc. The symptoms are all physical for me. It's just the most severe pain imaginable. I'm sure it's some type of nerve damage because it feels like burning knives stabbing into me..no words can describe the pain. I just want the pain gone as soon as possible, but I know if I go back on the medication I have to say goodbye to who I am as a person and my musical talent. I don't know what I'm supposed to do. Like I said, I have already missed so much of my life. I don't want to be bedridden from pain anymore 😞 It just hurts so much. And it's not even my fault because I never chose to go on this medication!! I feel like I'm screwed for life, and will never have a full life devoid of both pain and of the medication. What if I just never adjust to being off of it because I started so young? I just hope some people here can offer me advice on how to eliminate it without having pain like this. I just cannot stand the pain... I'm sorry this is so long but like all of you, my story is long! To make it easier if someone is just skimming, withdrawal symptoms include - severe burning / stabbing pain in upper back, chest, shoulders - occasional hip pain and inability to walk because of it - digestive problems (extreme bloating, heartburn) - lightheadedness when standing up at times - basically feel like all my nerves are on fire - chest tightness 24/7
  4. Hi all, I'm new to the forum and would like to provide you with a brief history of my antidepressant use and current situation. When I was in my teenage years (15) in 2003 I was diagnosed by a psychiatrist as having General Anxiety Disorder and Obsessive Compulsive Disorder due to having panic attacks and intrusive thoughts. I was prescribed Citalopram 10mg and to be honest I do not remember much during this time, all I know is that the medication worked to a certain extent reducing both my OCD and anxiety. (but never completely "curing" the conditions, only making them manageable) The side effects were brutal (weight gain, lack of empathy - turning me into a zombie and sexual disfunction being the main ones) but I continued taking the medication because I was told there was a "chemical imbalance" in my brain and the medication is the only solution. From 2003 to 2018 my dose was gradually increased from 10mg to 60mg as I had periods of anxiety and panic attacks through the years even when medicated. I distinctly remember that the medication stopped working for me in 2016 when I suddenly started having anxiety 24/7 with the occasional panic attack. In late 2018 I decided to come off the medication for good as I believed it was not helping me anymore and the side effects were quite debilitating. I consulted my general practitioner about stopping the medication in 2018, he suggested I cut the dose in half every 3 days and then stop when I hit 5mg. I did not quite follow his instructions as during my taper I experienced some severe withdrawal symptoms (brain zaps and agitation) so I decided to reduce my dose by 5mg every 2 weeks. My last dose was taken in March 2019 and I took 2 weeks leave from work in anticipation of the withdrawal. At first there was only brain zaps and some agitation that in itself was manageable, then came the gastro intestinal issues about 1 month after stopping the meds, mostly heartburn and IBS type symptoms. I did not link these issues with withdrawal and went to a GI specialist that performed multiple tests (Colonoscopy, Gastroscopy, CT scan and blood tests) all tests came back reporting no issues. after about 2 months off the meds I started having severe panic attacks and anxiety as well as pressure in my head (behind my eyes), severe dizziness and a lot more symptoms that I cannot even recall as they disappeared and reappeared seemingly at random. Due to the anxiety and panic attacks I started to struggle at work and I reasoned that it must be due to me requiring the medication and I probably need to take it for the rest of my life (even though it does not seem to do anything for me anymore). So I went back to the general practitioner explaining to him my situation and symptoms, he reinstated the Citalopram at 20mg (this was at the end of August 2019). After taking my first dose I felt fine but taking my 2nd dose all hell broke loose - intense shaking, vomiting, insomnia, hallucinating and migraines. On the 4th day after reinstating I ended up in the ER unable to sit still and focus on anything I probably looked like I was on hard drugs or something, they gave me some Ativan and sent me on my way advising me to cease my current medication and go see a psychiatrist. Off the Citalopram I was still in hell - could not focus or sleep, randomly crying over nothing. Finally I went to my appointment with the psychiatrist 2 weeks later - he prescribed me Effexor XR 75mg which he said will fix all my problems. Again I managed to make it to day 4 before giving up on the medication, it made me 100x worse. Once again I landed in ER with hallucinating, migraines, muscle spasms all over my body and my face muscles “pulling” downward rendering me unable to speak. The ER sent me to a mental health clinic as they could not assist me with my condition. Booking myself into the clinic I waited to see my psychiatrist, he told me to stop taking the Effexor XR and put me on Zoloft (Can’t remember the dosage) but I refused to take the medication as I was MUCH better off before reinstating and I already knew what will happen to me if I have to take another SSRI. Having refused the Zoloft and sending my psychiatrist a lengthy timeline of my symptoms showing that I get VERY sick every time I try another SSRI - So he puts me on 25mg Valdoxan. It does absolutely nothing for me (stopped taking it 2 weeks in as my psychiatrist refused to send me for liver tests) and my symptoms get better as the Effexor leaves my system. This was approximately 6 weeks ago, currently it feels like I am in hell, I am able to work but I am struggling. I had blood work done today and will get the results back on Monday (just to make sure I don’t have some kind of infection/disease/vitamin deficiency - because it literally feels like I am dying). I am seeing a neurologist in late November so they can do some scans of my brain to further make sure nothing is physically wrong with me and when I get the all clear I feel I will be able to hang on for the duration of this terrible terrible experience. I only started to log my symptoms about 3 weeks ago but in those 3 weeks I have experienced: Abdominal Pain Joint Pan Migraines / Headaches Feeling of insects crawling under my skin throughout my entire body Severe fatigue Body trembling (muscle twitches in legs and arms) When holding arms/legs together can feel a quick repeating “pulse” of muscles Pain in hands/wrists muscles feeling “not connected” touching objects feels strange (numb). Nausea / Vomiting Visual problems feels like the brightness in my eyes was turned up to 11 this produces poor night vision Dizziness Pain in neck and head (right side) - behind ear to forehead Pain in thighs Super brain zaps? - lasts hours instead of seconds (worsens with eye movement / sound) - Pressure/Tingling in skull, sensitive to sound I do believe all the above mentioned symptoms seem to align with withdrawal perfectly, but I am still very scared. Not knowing when/if I will get better is true torture. My hope is to get support/advice/hope from this forum that I cannot receive from the medical professionals I have access to (they do not know or seem to care about this very real and very frightening condition) and to help others where I can to the best of my ability.
  5. Hello all I’ve been searching on this site for a while I’ve seen a lot of posts can anyone shed shed some light. There is a lot more to my story but tying to keep it short as possible So here goes I started my very first prescription drug flupentixol around 19 years old I am now 28 I can’t even really remember much about that time I had really bad anxiety/panic attacks distorted mood. So dr prescribed and I took it. Through out them years had many ups and downs. I used to drink a lot so most of my younger years I can’t remember much I think I just blocked a lot of it out and put a lot of my issues aside. In this time though I wasn’t depressed I just didn’t really have a purpose in life. Most of the time on this drug it was great. 2017 I started getting a lot more issues had a lot of stressors going on in my life I took a turn experienced what I would call sort of a psychotic episode couldn’t think clearly was so confused thought I was going insane, in desperation not knowing anything about ADs I upped my dose for a few days and nothing still felt insane with thoughts It carried on with intense crying spells and hopelessness. I went back to GP and they prescribed me citalopram had a really bad reaction but still managed 17 days of torture. Was told to immediately come of the medication and side effects reduced soon after. (Still on flupentixol) Although I still wasn’t back to myself I was prescribed Mirtazapine 15mg and felt better after one week. The only side effects I had were RLS and weight gain. I decided to come off as I thought I was feeling better but also was putting on weight. I tapered as per GP’s advice alternate days with in four weeks I was completely off. (Still on flupentixol) Roughly 2 months later I had a small trigger I immediately spiralled back into a depressed state. I wanted to try with out any medication (self-help books, exercise) I wasn’t getting any better after 5-6 months later. I then took another major turn. I decided that the only thing that would help was another AD. Came off flupentixol within few months Gp said to come straight off as wouldn’t get withdrawal from that type of drug. I visited my GP who referred me to the mental health team who prescribed me duloxetine as they thought would help with my spinal pain (scheuermann's disease) I lasted 5 days roughly and came off as the anxiety was so intense. So I went back to Mirtazapine yes In the beginning I got the usual sedation like effects. The longer I was on it though the more I started to lose myself. I had paranoia. Extreme dread (especially upon waking) suicidal, anxiety as time went on, GI issues/trouble breathing, visual disturbances (blurred vision, floaters) Dilated pupils,Teeth clenching worsened Depression/hopelessness,Constant rumbling in belly, Heavy pulse in stomach Anxiousness/irritability, Extreme health anxiety Constant state of fear, Restlessness, Palpitations,Abnormal thinking/distorted mood Sadness,Tinnitus/full ears,Hungover feeling in the morning, Headache/neck ache Mouth sores/funny taste in mouth, Random body pain, Cold feet,Hot flushes,Itching, Lower back pain, Abnormal dreams,Voice changes Body jerks/spasms, Chest pain/rib pain Lumpy painful groin,Sensitive to pain Painful hands and feet, Nausea,Anger/overwhelmed,Early satiety,No appetite,Flu like symptoms/malaise,Tingling sensations Sharp/stabbing head pains,Depersonalisation Pulsating In ear I never had most of these side effects before Mirtazapine i went on for mainly depression and few other issues (possibly wd from last year?) I’ve been off them completely for 8 weeks now. A lot of symptoms have dropped off but a lot of them are still ongoing. I don’t get why I’ve had such adverse side effects this time around on and now off the drug? 1st week of coming off, extreme nausea and flu like symptoms, sweating/clammy. Anxiousness. Diarrhoea Current ongoing issues intermittently Pain in ribs, chest, also lower back aching pain which didn’t have with my spinal condition before. (Seemed to have eased for now) Hands and feet painful Hips, bum. Excruciating head pains but also over sensitised to pain, front of neck, jaw, groin, allergies- catarrh, itchy roof of mouth nose, lost sense of taste. Ongoing GI issues(never had issues with this before Mirtazapine) currently being investigated for celiac and other diseases. Awaiting results from endoscopy biopsy. Intense emotional lows Intense anger occasional paranoia Blurry vision/floaters sensitivity to light Sensitivity to sound, tinnitus Poor cognitive function - Confusion, brain fog, memory issues. Extreme Depression,Extreme fatigue, Nausea,Poor body temperature regulation,Extreme Health anxiety/fear I’m convinced I have cancer or some serious disease. Painful teeth and gums. (Could be due To the teeth clenching) There is prob a few more I haven’t listed I’m constantly looking up my symptoms. The ones I’m worried about most is my weight loss (underweight) I can’t seem to put on any weight which scares me, and I’m full quickly after eating, although I have lost appetite a bit I do eat often! All my symptoms point to cancer. Also the intense emotions that come across feel so overwhelming it’s scary it’s like my cortisol is so so high! Anything little my stress response can’t handle it. This has been a real struggle writing this and it’s taken me weeks. My Taper would be considered CT. My GP’s great advice alternate days for 2 weeks then come off. Although I took it slower and came off Mirtazapine with 2 months. I couldn’t handle the adverse effects anymore they were making me sicker. Although I’ve had some better hours what I’ve seen people call windows. This last week I’m going through a wave I can’t get off. I’m so confused by all of this and disheartened is it the drugs that have done this to me or is it a serious illness. I have never felt so unwell in my life physically and mentally. Part of me thinks it’s wd related and the other part is saying it’s not. I’ve not had many days without pain. Another thing to mention I did a genetic test and have many mutations Including MTHFR, COMT. My report flags up red for AD response. Also have a variant gene for celiac disease. I’m possibly deficient in a lot of things maybe hence the weight loss etc. Malabsorption issues which is being looked into Also early hours this morning my Fitbit says I was awake for 15 min and I’ve noticed I’ve taken random pics on my phone of the floor etc which I can’t remember doing! I don’t know if reinstatement would be a good idea I wasn’t Even stable on the drug it’s changed my life I’m scared Please someone with a similar story or advice help me out. I just feel like giving up
  6. Light

    ☼ Light

    Hello, SA members- My intro--After 9 years of antidepressant use Zoloft pooped out on me in a big way and so began the reckless polypharmacy that lead me to where I am today... At its worst I was on 5-6 psychotropic drugs including multiple serotonergic drugs that left me emotionless, anhedonic, overweight, asexual, and moody. I also experienced several frightening and dangerous episodes of serotonin syndrome that led to a hellish 4.5 year taper off of all medication. During this time I experienced severe depersonalization/derealization, serious cognitive issues, mood swings, blinding fatigue, sleep disturbance, OCD, severe anxiety, a cartoonish inability to tolerate stress, muscle twitches/tremors/jerks, headaches/head pressure, hypersexuality, visual disturbances, etc. This whole period felt quite literally felt like a nightmare and to a lesser extent continues to today. I am currently nearly 6 years clean and although there has been significant improvement in many areas I continue to experience cognitive issues, episodes of confusion, intense muscle irritation, and agitation, as well as migraines. My functioning has improved but I am still a long way from living a full life. The last 6 months have been particularly difficult, as some of my worst episodic symptoms have returned. Although I believe that I will continue to heal this recent setback has made it difficult for me to believe in a full recovery. Thanks "Sur" and it's great to see some "long timers" here! Wishing you all continued improvement in this very difficult journey... -Light
  7. Hello. This is my intro. The last 8 months have been hell as my insomnia got worse with each drug given to “help”. Things fell apart after taking a month of medical marajuana in May 2018. I then was then put on ambien seroquel and lexepro July 2018. Nothing helped. I was cycling badly ( every other day was good/bad) my shrink ink took me off lexepro (5mg). In sept 2018 and onto lithium. I could take the lithium due to terrible headaches. The insomnia worsened and I could no longer live at home as i was a danger to myself. I went to an inpatient clinic/ rehab. And was tapered off seroquel (25mg). And ambuen(2.5 mg). I also went back on the lexepro (10mg). For 6 weeks and then was tapered off it for another 6 weeks. At the end of the lexepro taper things went to hell again. I am again cycling pretty badly. I sleep a few hours every other night. I’ve been off the lex. Almost 1 month. Still on 25 mg hydroxizine and 4 mg melatonin. Would like to get off these meds but am so unstable I am afraid to start tapering. I am calm at night but just don’t sleep. Sometimes I start to dream but I am still awake. I do do all the sleep stuff people recommend. Dark room, epson baths, mediation etc. desperate for relief. Goosie
  8. Hi, I have struggled with anxiety for a long time and Zoloft saved me and I was on it for 11 years and tapered off slowly over a year as I felt stronger and did not want to take it for life. My last dose was December 2018 and I was fine. But these last couple of months, I am struggling with anxiety and my moods. Having emotional blunting and worsening derealisation, my derealisation I feel came on in 2016 for no reason and has not gone away. I really feel dead inside. When playing video games I feel in auto pilot and have no enjoyment attached to it. I can have a laugh at work with my friends but I feel dead and detached/ I even had a massive anxiety attack in June, that made my heart rate so high I had to go to emergency department, since then I have had mini ones that I have managed to control. I have tried everything, bike riding/exercise, Apple cider vinegar, multivitamins, magnesium, fish oil, vitamin d, probiotics, change of diet, positive thinking etc.. I recently had a full blood test done and vitamin D levels are good and bloods are normal. My Bilirubin was high but doctor said there was no clinical significance. But the anxiety is catching me out of nowhere and I am getting anxious over small situations and things, even stuff like the weather is affecting my moods, when it is overcast and dull, I feel really down. I am on a constant state of alert and it is affecting my hearing/tinnitus. I really thought I could do it but it seems that I need help. What medication is there that I can take that has the least side effects and will help me feel emotions more again and less blunted and more attached to my body? I have a doctors appointment in a week and I know he is going to say to me go back on meds. I really don't want to go back on Zoloft as I think that caused some of my emotional blunting towards the end and derealisation. I have put below in quotes my derealisation symptoms below if it is of any interest. I assume it is derealisation? This came on in 2016 and coming off Zoloft in 2018 has made no difference to it, if anything has made it worse.. Something changed in me 2016 and I know I do not feel right, it was like I switched into a different state of perception and feeling. Still to this day, I remember how I used to feel and I know that what I am going through is not right. Nothing happened in 2016 apart from going on holiday in July. All this started around October 2016. Mental State: Constant brain fog, heavy headed and feel tired/fatigued. I am detached from myself and do not feel connected with my body, like looking at my arms, feels like they are not a part of me, I feel like I am in a dream and in a haze. Emotionally numb but can feel anxiety and panic with no issues at times. I can carryout daily tasks and work perfect, my mental capacity or memory is not affected and I feel sharp as I have always been and fully aware of what I am doing or what is going on in front of me. Just feel like I am in auto pilot and different from how I normally would feel. I feel like I am in a 24/7 hangover or high, not one day I have had a break from this. Eyes: Constant light sensitivity (Everything is bright to my eyes and it has changed the way I view things especially in dark environments, seems that my eyes are blurry from being light sensitive) Visual snow. My eyes feel heavy and tired and bloodshot at times. Fuzzy vision. Sleeping: I sleep around 10:30pm to 6am but wake up like I have only had 3 hours sleep and really heavy headed and groggy with dry mouth. I never wake up feeling refreshed, it is like I wake up with a hangover, This head space feeling doesn’t go away, it is connected to the above symptoms. I am tired all day. On some days during the month: I feel really ill, and I mean really ill, On these really ill days, I wake up really fatigued, more so than other days and feel like I am about to come down with something but never do, I feel so ill and really really dead inside, no emotions and feel sick and I feel so tired and weak. It is like I have been hit with a virus out of nowhere overnight. I feel better the next day after sleep, but all the other symptoms like the detachment, feeling spaced out, fatigued, light sensitivity etc.. remain. I have good and bad days. But the really ill days can happen a few times a month. It is like on these really ill days, my current symptoms, are amplified to the extreme. Body: My neck, upper back and jaw feel stiff and tense all the time, especially near the base of the skull and neck and the upper back, It is really noticeable around the back of my neck. Sometimes there is a shooting nerve sensation near my lower neck/upper back. It is like a nerve spasm. My neck and back are giving me real issues when I work and sleep and general resting. There is a cracking/popping sound between the shoulder blades and spine and neck when I move that area. I get a random dull ache that lasts days on my lower right side back. My neck and back issues are at their worst when I have one of the hearing/tinnitus episodes, I assume they are related? My head at times feels like there is pressure in it and I get more frequent headaches and pains inside my head than I used to. I get headaches when waking up in the morning a few days a week. These headaches can vary on different sides of my brain. I am constantly getting mouth ulcers all the time, so it is a sign that I am run down from something. Hearing: My tinnitus is so loud now and my hearing is becoming different. Every day when I get home from work, I am exhausted. Thank you
  9. Hi friends! I am a 24 year old male. I had been using Venlafaxine XR 225mg capsules for around a year and a half ( July 2017- April 2019). I'd started Venlafaxine for my chronic fatigue which was thought to be depression (it most probably was). Other drugs I used: -Pre Workouts(PW): Mix of Caffeine, PEAs, and a variety of nootropics. I used these almost daily to try to stay awake. They helped me enormously with school and social life; to the point that I got psychologically addicted. -Modafinil(rarely): Best antidepressant I've ever felt in my life when it was combined with the Venlafaxine. Not stimulating like the PWs, just made me feel completely normal. - 4 LSD trips over 1 year In March of this year I had decided that the Venlafaxine had not been having any major positive effects and that I was better off stopping it. Together with my psychiatrist we decided to taper off of it. At the time I didn't know about the importance of proper tapering and neither does my psyhiatrist. Her plan consisted of reducing to 150mg for 2 weeks and then 75mg for another two, after which I went down to 0. I had the classical 1-2 weeks of acute withdrawal with the brain zaps, nausea, depersonalisation, derealisation, extreme depression and anxiety etc. Followed by this I went through about 2 weeks of what I would consider complete normality and I thought I was out of the woods. Following those 2 weeks it got really bad. I got severe parestethias, numbness, extreme fatigue, anxiety, lack of concentration. Over a period of 1 month I failed 3 exams in med school. I was trying to keep myself focused and alert with the PWs and Modafinil but I seemed to be hyper-reactive to them. Sometimes they worked really well but sometimes they gave me this intense head pressure where I could theoretically see but it was more like a brain and "eye" fog. Before the withdrawal, and before every taking Venlafaxine, my tiredness, or low mood, or anxiety could be temporarily fixed by taking PW. I was not getting any of the functional use anymore. Since then, I've been getting waves of this sort of state, with waves of feeling "better", but I haven't felt close to how I used to feel on Venlafaxine since, or even before starting Venlafaxine. In other words I'm doing worse now than before starting the VF. In the worst parts of the wave I can't even take caffeine anymore without getting head pressure and a sense of overstimulation. Before all this it was like I didn't even have a threshold for how high I could go with stimulants without adverse effects, but now I take 1/4-1/8 of what I used to, and even that's risky. I'm not looking for the "rush" again, I'm just trying to be as transparent as possible with how my body reacts. For my last exam in July, I had a 3 week period where I took Wellbutrin IR 150mg so I wouldn't fail again. It seemed to help bring me a bit closer to stability, but again nothing like before. On Jul 5th I quit Wellbutrin cold turkey. As far as I can tell I've had no withdrawal symptoms at all. Nowadays I try maintaining stability by Meditating, taking Mg Glycinate( 400 - 800 mg ) and Fish Oil. I've also had another 2 LSD trips and one Mushroom trip. All of these have helped me with accepting my symptoms and powering through the day. I'm still taking low doses of PW to get any sort of semblance of energy and focus through the day. However, I'd ideally like to reinstate VF so I can taper properly and be stable. These symptoms are very disruptive and I'd love to go back to any semblance of my old stable self. Would it still make sense for me to try reinstating something like 37.5mg or 75mg Venlafaxine now and starting tapering? Is my only other option waiting it out? Sorry for the long block of text. Any advice is appreciated.
  10. Hey guys, my name is Charlie and I've been on sertraline for five years, I tried to come off it about two years back but it took an abnormally long period of time. Anyways, hi.
  11. I had been taking 10 mg of Prozac for about 4.5 years (Jan 2014-- Sept 2018) without any negative experience. Due to a pharmacy error my medicine was increased to 20 mg (Oct 2018)-I took for 1 month (unknowingly) but I did not take in Nov 2018 b/c felt uncomfortable on. Early Dec 2018 medicine prescription was increased to 40 mg (7 days at 30mg, then to 40mg). One month (Jan 2019) after the increase I developed hand tremors and noticed issues with cognition. The medicine was decreased to 30 mg (Jan 2019) and the tremors did cease. But continuing on 30 mg over the next 2 months (Feb-March 2019) the side effects still included cognitive issues- processing speed/retention/memory/following conversations AND in March I started to develop a strange headache/head pain/ heaviness in my head, neck stiffness, global facial muscle tightness, a strain on my ability to read, food sensitivity. I had not had any of these symptoms prior to the increase. At that point (end of March 2019) I wanted to discontinue Prozac. The doctor said I should try another SSRI and prescribed 25 mg of Zoloft (which I tried for 7 day--until early April 2019). I still preferred to discontinue with the meds. I did ask if tapering was necessary and I was informed no. I was told I did not need to worry. SO I DID STOP COLD TURKEY. I asked if symptoms would go away and I was told after stopping the medicine at most a month or two---I wouldn’t be experiencing anything. It has now been 4 months since stopping medicine (cold turkey) and I am still experiencing several issues that started after the higher dosage—for example the headache/head pain (like a weightiness in my head), a constant stiff right neck and lower right head region, facial muscle tightness, when speaking a tightness in the neck area and face feels tight, and a restrain on my ability to read (internally) whenever I try I feel head tension and tightness around eye muscles. It's like I experience a pressure/ tightness in back of head/ overall head & eyes when reading (internally) which affects pace/comprehension/retention and causes fatigue. Certain foods cause face to feel tight. And though some of the cognitive issues have improved, I still have some slower processing with certain things/ and the physical strain when reading. A new symptom that started shortly after stopping the medicine (off and on shock like feelings on the right side of my body that come and go randomly). Overall, the restrain on reading affects my ability to pursue educational and career goals. . summary: 10 mg prozac for about 5 years (no adverse effects). Increased to 40 mg prozac Dec 2018 (negative), then decrease to 30 mg (Jan 2019). Remained at 30mg until end of March 2019 (still adverse affects). Zoloft for one week until April (still adverse). Last day on medicine April 1st, 2019. Stopped medicine cold turkey. No tapering schedule. 4 months out--still adverse effects. At this point, I just want to get better.
  12. clarknova

    Clarknova: Hello, SA!

    Hello, SA Hello, everyone. Long time lurker, but this is my first post. First of all I want to thank everyone on this site for educating me and giving me comfort through rough times. I’ve read and re-read posts and found tremendous solace in your stories. At the same time, I’m truly sorry for all your struggles. My story: I’m male, 42 years of age, I work as a TV-editor and I live in Oslo, Norway. In 2004, after touring with a band for a year and a half, I had severe panic attacks, 2-3 times a day for about 6 months. I finally saw my doctor and he put me on 10 mg of cipralex and referred me to a support group which I participated in for 2.5 years. It helped me tremendously, so I told the doctor in 2007 I was feeling better and he said I could taper down over a few weeks. This went fine and for a few years I was okay. No withdrawal that I can remember. Then, in 2010, following a break-up, I didn’t want to feel heart-broken and so I asked my doctor if I could go back on cipralex. I don’t think I was depressed, I just didn’t want to feel sad (How I wish I could go back, I'd take the natural sadness instead). I went back on 10 mg cipralex and this was fine, no severe side-effects (On the contrary, I actually enjoyed having delayed orgasms as I was often more premature when not on meds). But after a while I noticed subtle changes to my personality. I’m a musician and have made music since the age of 14, but suddenly I wasn’t interested anymore. I stopped writing songs. I also stopped crying completely, even the good cries, like when I saw Good Will Hunting or Finding Neverland. I didn’t feel very much of anything and starting thinking that this was not the way to go through life. So I told the doctor I wanted to get off the meds, and he basically said I knew how it worked now and could regulate my medication use on my own. So I did. In 2015 I tapered pretty quickly, probably over a month, and was fine for a while. A few heavy crying-spells, but nothing major. I started making music again, and sold an apartment so I had enough money to not work since I was sick of my job as a TV-editor anyway. Then, at the end of 2015, a toxic friend I was trying to avoid suddenly had a major life-crisis and was asking a lot from me in terms of help and support. I tried my best, but at the same time; this was a person I didn’t want in my life. I became very upset, not knowing what to do. I had overwhelming anxiety and ended up in the emergency room begging for valium. Having a somewhat avoidant personality, I decided the only thing I could do was to skip town. I went to my mothers and after a few days crashed completely. I felt I was a horrible person for skipping out on someone who needed me even though I wanted to distance myself from this person. I felt I had become like my late father, avoiding responsibility. I became extremely depressed. The massive anxiety made self-harm feel like a dangerous possibility and so I was brought to the emergency room and was told by the psychiatrist there that I should go back on the cipralex since that had worked for me before. I reluctantly did what she said and was back on the meds. Looking back, I realise now that this episode with the toxic friend happened while I had been off meds for about 6 months and my reaction to it could very well have been massive because of a overly sensitive CNS. Anyway, I had never been this sick. I was hanging on for dear life. Awful depression and intense anxiety. I walked and walked, and swam and swam (at the local pool) just to keep everything at bay. Mornings and evenings were worst. I saw Douglas Bloch-videos on youtube over and over again for comfort. I got some follow-up from the local psychiatric hospital and after four months, now 2016, I realised that living with my mother wasn’t doing my self-esteem much good so I moved back to my apartment in Oslo and explained to my old boss that I had had a nervous break-down and asked if I could come back to work - not do anything, not get paid, just come to the office every day. I couldn't manage even the smallest responsibilities. He was very understanding and said of course. Just being around people helped me a lot, and after a while I started helping out with scripts and some minor editing work. After a few months I was given a 50% position working from 9 to 13 every day. Slowly I got better and started working full time through 2016, 2017 and 2018. I was still on meds, but again feeling like I was too much of a Zombie I wanted to be free of them. So in early 2018 I decided to taper. I went down to 5mg for a month, then 2.5 for a month and then quit in april. May and June were just horrible with depression and anxiety so I got back on them again, but then regretted it, so tapered again, same protocol - 5 mg for a month, then 2.5 for a month and then quit in september, deciding to make it stick this time. And I have. It’s been just over a year. I found this site, and of course realised that I had tapered too quickly. But thinking come what may, I trudged on. In March and April of this year I got the weirdest muscle aches. It had all the hallmarks of fibromyalgia and so I was convinced I had that, but then realising it was probably withdrawal. It suddenly went away, and May, June and July were really good, I was thinking “Yeah, I beat it!”. Then, as I started work after the summer, I had 5 weeks on a very stressful project. It must have triggered something, because after it was finished I started crashing. The muscle pain came back, especially in the chest and neck, muscles hard and tight as a rock. Also my health-anxiety has slowly increased since I came off the meds, so now I’ll have weeks were I’m convinced I have a heart conditon or some form of cancer or infection. I go to the doctor a lot and he tells me I’m fine (I don’t even discuss SSRI’s with him anymore, because everytime I’ve tried he has brushed it off like so many of you are probably familiar with). And then, about a week and a half ago suddenly the muscle pain went away, but I became extremely depressed. And really suddenly too, like from one minute to the next. And it’s been fluxuating wildly ever since. Just this god awful suicidal depression. It’ll be horrible for a few hours or half a day, and then I will get a little relief. Like a nightmareish rollercoaster ride. The massive break-down of 2015 fresh in my memory like a trauma, I spiral into terrible anxiety about going back there, having to quit my job, moving back with my mother, going back to hospital, going back on cipralex just because I’ve lost all will to put up a fight against the doctors. But the little man in my head, behind the gruesome thoughts and feelings, is trying to flow with it, and I try to remember what’s really going on here - I’m in protracted withdrawal, I tapered too fast, my CNS is scrambling, I’m healing in waves and windows. As I am writing this tonight, I feel alright, but it’s sure to fluxuate again soon. I wanted to post this to tell my story, as I have found relief in all your stories. I’d like to bring updates when I can, and I’ll try to contribute to others if I feel I can add some value. In short, I hope to be a part of this community. You have all convinced me that this is indeed happening, and occasionally I have hate for my doctor for dealing me these drugs, but at the same time I know he doesn’t know any better. Everyone’s stumbling around in the dark, it seems. In 2004 there was a case for me needing medication, but in 2010 it was all my doing, not wanting to feel the effects of a break-up I took the easy route. I have to take some of the responsibility for that. I just didn’t know how powerful these drugs actually were. I know now. All the best.
  13. Hi everyone! I've been off medicines for about 6 months. Most of the overbearing physical side effects are manageable now. However, now that I am back into the semester a new effect is apparent. I have trouble focusing on anything. Never before have I had such problems with attention and focus on tasks. Any tips or similar experiences? I've considered reinstating simply because it's affecting my academics. Would that be 5 steps back or a suitable temporary solution?
  14. Alto and everyone who was there for me in the beginning, thank you. A lifetime of lessons learned. I ID as someone who has fully recovered. I no longer believe my brain is damaged. I still have depressive episodes, but I think differently about them. I am not the same person I was before Prozac. It makes me sad, yes. Part of my recovery is letting go that the past could be different. I still contend that taking this poison was my life's biggest regret, but I don't live in that space. Acceptance has helped me push to a new level of life. I am 4 years out as on 11/1. Things that helped: Gut biome (this is EVERYTHING - see new study that just came out about antiDs and gut bacteria............) Gluten-free Low-histamine foods Sugar-free (being on a glycemic roller coaster is your ticket to hell) Exercise (natural anxiety killer) Fish oil (not for first year) Magnesium (as much as you can stand) Socializing/laughing (this is distraction/escape from your misery) CBT (I learned not to indulge anxiety-filled thoughts) B vitamins (not for first two years; caused anxiety and jitters and too much energy) Sleep (I didn't sleep first two years due to sky-high cortisol) ADMIN NOTE: Cakes's Intro topic is here
  15. Hello Its now about 4 years since i stopped taking remeron 15 mg i was on it for 6 months Lools like im permanently damaged, i feel like im mentally retarded, i never again had sleep like in the past, its like i was removed from this planet, my eyes are blank and my mind my emotions gone my personality my love and everthing else, im an empty shell I dont care about anything anymore, i spent money without thinking, no need for social contacts, i cant even enjoy having sex anymore I do not longer have my inner monolouge with myself so i cant function if i dont hear my thoughts Writting this was hard, concentration is gone It looks like chemical lobotomy
  16. Hi. I'm mark. Was on prozac for 6 years. Cold turkeyed. And stayed off for 3 months. Went back on citalopram for 6 months. Tapered over 3 weeks(doctor said taper wasn't required but I did anyways). I'm now off for 15 months in agonizing hell. Here are my symptoms. Anxiety Depression Lethargy Fatigue Breathing issues Food,light,noise,motion sensitivity Irritability Suicidal thoughts Throat clearing Voice issues Sleep/wake issues
  17. I was on Effexor for 17 years, l got off cold turkey 2 years ago in November. I tried to kill myself, over dose in pills. The Doctors knocked out my front teeth, to save my life with the breathing tube. I hate life, l have chronic fatigue, tremors, memory problems, can't concentrate, bones hurt, spinal problems, digestive problems, insomia, etc. I'm angry this medicine destroyed me. I hate living through this hell.
  18. Hello. I stopped taking Ssri in 2013. I had taken them for 14 years and benefited greatly from them. I knew nothing really about them and stopped abruptly after reading some article in a magazine about their long term effects. I suffered greatly for 2 years trying several times to get on a different SSRIs( I didn’t know I should have tried the original) i was completely non functional. Things have stayed fairly static since 2015. Still functioning at about 15% of pre 2013 constant tinnitus constant jaw and facial pain constant headache bouts of vertigo constant stiff neck from akathesia chronic fatigue chronic insomnia agitation/akathesia/rls severe depression doom repetitive thoughts lots more things. my psychiatrist agreed I had akathesia but propranolol/clonidine has not really helped. I am going to try liquid Prozac. I don’t know if this is the right thing as it caused akathesia when I took it 10 years ago but only for a few weeks then worked very well. i do not want to take any meds but I don’t live a life I just exist. I was hoping for a little support with this trial.
  19. Hi everyone, I'm Mark, living in Marseille, south east of France, I'm 36 yo. I began Paxil (Deroxat in France), in 1999, given for a "IBS" (irritative bowel syndrom)... 20mg a day (1999-2014). 2010-2014 were the best years of my life, friends, family, job, music, soccer, etc etc... Mid-2014 I decided by myself to reduce Paxil. So, I started to take 20mg a day, then 10mg next day, then 20, then 10 ... End 2014, jav/fev 2015, I took 10, 5, 10, 5.. then 5mg... 2 weeks after being at 5 mg / day, my life turned to hell. Many symptoms occured weeks after weeks : Nausea, dizziness, lightheadness, belly ache, loss of appetite, tinnitus, electric schocks when moving eyes... Then i thought about my paxil reduction... I re-start 10mg in 2015, then 20mg since january 2016, but my symptoms are still here... Now, I just wanna die with those awful nausea all day, dizziness etc... Sometimes I have 1, 2, 3 days where symptoms seem to reduce, then they retstart awfully... In 2015 I had all medical examination to exclude other problem : Colonoscopie, Pillcam (for small intestine), Ultrasound, 2 Belly MRI, 2 head MRI, tons of blood analysis, eyes tests, inner ears tests, etc, etc... Nothing found... I saw more than 20 doctors in 18 month (gastro, neuro, diagnosticians, ENT, opthalmo, psychiatrists...). None want to listen me, and all say that's not a problem with my paxil, because Withdrawal least no more than few weeks... I'm here, to claim for help. i really need somebody who understands me, who well knows withdrawal problems, etc... I don't understand why I don't feel better since I have re-taken 20 mg... Sorry for my bad english.
  20. Hi, I thought I would introduce myself. Have joined this forum after experiencing horrendous withdrawals from anti-depressants. I am 34, female. Currently 3 months completely off of Prozac which I took for 6 years at the highest dose I understand is allowed to be prescribed in the UK (60mg daily). I weaned down from 60mg to 0mg over 5 months. Have had 3 months of pure hell since stopping taking Prozac completely - symptoms ranging from suicidal depression, nausea, migraines, loss of appetite, the most debilitating anxiety and panic. Weakness, crying spells, the most excruciating emotional and psychic pain that I have ever had to endure. All the symptoms I have read others have experienced except I haven't had brain zaps - not sure why. Am determined to stay off of Prozac and just go through what I need to. Very grateful to have come across this forum and hopefully to be able to share how I am getting through and to hear how others have managed and hopefully to offer support too. I am aware that there seems to be no other way that through this - keen to connect with others who are finding a way through. Very keen to connect and speak further to anyone else having to go through this. Very determined to get through although very aware it feels like you just don't know what each day will bring or when you really are finally on solid ground. Very keen to hear others experiences. I am using the idea of windows and waves to navigate through currently. Very keen to connect with others. Natalie
  21. Hello! please i need help. 2017 i have Problems with insomnia. i went to a Doktor. Trazodone dont Works. Seroquel make me like a zombie. My doctor gives me cipralex 10 mg. And lyrica 25 in the morning 50mg in the evening and 150 mg at night. 1mg xanax in the night . I Woke up a little bit feeling drunken. And i had a tremor . But this goes away. I know a side effekt from lyrica. 10 days later my doctor said put the xanax away. So i make this with Nothing sleep. So she said xanor again and 30mg mirtazapine. It works and so i can cut off the xanax. Every week 0.5 mg tapering. It was no problem for me. I feel good. I have Problems from the mirtazapine with my eyes. I couldnt fokus on a Objekt. I told this to my doctor. Of course its psychosomatic she said . It goes away . Today i know its a side effekt from mirtazapine. But it goes away. Then my doctor said taper the cipralex and the pregabalin. She said every day 5mg away from cipralex and every day 50mg from the lyrica . So i taper the cipralex in one week and i taper the lyrica in one week. From the lyrica tapering i woke up in the night and my body was very wet. So i told this to my doctor and she said thats psychosomatic . I know thats a side effect from tapering lyrica too fast. So i took lyrica 50mg at night again with the mirtazapine. It works. But after 2 months later i was from the mirtazapine very tired. One day it was not so bad and At the next day i felt so tired. My doctor said thats Not possible. She said i can Not have one day side effects and one day Not. So my doctor gives me cipralex again. I said to her i know thats the mirtazapine. I reduced the mirtazapine 22.5 mg . It dont get better. 15 mg ....nothing better. So she said took it away. I have no more side effects when i gave the mirtazapin away. she gives me xanor. 0.5 mg . After 3 Weeks i woke up in the morning with pain behind my eyes. I told this to my doctor. She said thats psychosomatic. She said lyrica again 150mg in the evening and in the morning 75 mg and in the evening 75 mg It doesnt work. My eyes still get hurts It was horrible. So 4 weeks later she said put the lyrica in the day away and also the cipralex. She said when You have this problem with the eyes and head hurts take a xanor. So i took the xanor for 3 months. The symptoms get very worst I dont know what happend to me. I went to seven doctors. Everybody said i have a depression with Body symptoms. The want to give me venlafaxin and mirtazapine. I took this Not. I was now in a Dose of xanax 3.5 mg. My First doctor know this. I get very worse. I Think my head was exploding. i Think i must die. The doctor Number eight was the right doctor. He said you Are always in a withdrawal from xanax. Your brain wont more. I Cant believe that. So the new doctor bring me to the hospital. For the xanax withdrawal. It was the hell. The gives me clonidin and lyrica 100- 100-100- 300 lyrica Instead the xanax the gives me oxazepam. It works and helps me a little bit of the benzo withdrawal. And cipralex 25mg because i am a fast metabolizer of this medication From mirtazapine i am a very slow metabolizer. The doctors in the hospital makes this special blood Test. Maybe thats the reason why i have side effects from the mirtazapine the new doctor said. After 6 weeks i was benzo free . I have no symptomes like exploding head or eyes pain or like buggs under my skin. Lyrica works good but sometimes i was very tired from the medication But Not every day. Sometimes i was a little bit lyrica high. After 10 weeks later i have many side effekts from lyrica.very Tired all the time. It was horrible. I was so sad about that. Every medication is for a little time good for me and than i have side effects I cant believe that. So i tappered the lyrica . 25 mg every week. I woke up in the morning and i Think i am on benzo withdrawal again. The side effekts dont get away. I was so tired . And at the next 2 hours i was very fit.Somethings goes wrong with my brain ..then the extremley tierdness go away. Now i am 6 months free from lyrica. 1 year free from benzos I have many symptoms The come and goes in waves. Feeling dizzy i can Not go into sunlight because my eyes hurts from the light. Extremley brain fog like my brain is away. Sleep disturbance . I have no concentration. When i wake up in the night i have often headaches or a pressure in my head Often the pressure in my head and under my eyes is before i go to sleep. I wake up in the night unphysiologic very dizzy and dazed and i see to my eyes like a fog. Sun trigger the symptomes. I can not go in the sunlight with my dog . I am so dazed every day . Sometimes it get better . Windows and waves. Often i can do nothing because the symptomes are so bad. I look in the mirror and i see a young woman with a very white face and i look so old .....not like me. My head feel sometimes so Hot but the Temperature is normal. I Think its all from the lyrica tapering. Its a nightmare. Parästhesia in my leg. Old symptomes gone and NEW come. Its horrible. I have this all not before. My doctor said its paws. My brain is from the medication a little bit demaged. It Gould be better in 2 years. I am medication free. My Situation is very bad. My doctor said my brain is not in homäosthase my neurotransmittersystem is confoused. I have many read about the paws and neurotransmittersystem. I can not work i am at home. Would it get better? Thank you for help. I have a iatrogen damaged. All the time . The nightmare begans 2017 with All the medication. P.s. excuse me for my unperfekt English I am from Vienna Austria
  22. Hi everyone! I've been reading this forum for months and it has helped me immensely. I've been drug free for 6 months. Have had many WD symptoms that have come and gone, but the past few days have been awful. Headaches (brain pain is more accurate though) and brain shivers (very strange feeling, not sure how else to describe it), memory is all of a sudden awful, feel like I can't gather a thought in my head, feels like I won't be able to even remember my name, can't focus on anything for any length of time, brain humming sound at night (although this isn't new). I haven't felt this bad since I stopped. Has anyone else experienced this? Do things get worse before they get better? I thought that 6 months out the waves of WD would be easier than the previous months? I'm taking Vit D, Omega 3 fish oil, Vit C (just stopped to see if it was affecting my headaches etc). Thank you for creating this forum! I'm so grateful it exists and for any support. Trying to stay hopeful, but these past fews days have been challenging.
  23. I am coming off of citalopram for the second time. The first time was about eight months ago and I slowly weaned myself off. I still had a lot of side effects and emotionally was miserable. I was so irritable and snappy. I felt awful. I lasted eight months before my anxiety went up again and so after talking with my doctor, started back on citalopram 20 mg. I’ve now been on it for four months but want to wean off as I am planning to become pregnant and it was advised I should be off of citalopram before then. I’m really nervous because of how awful it was the last time but I am hopeful because I know what to expect, I can get through it. Just here looking for support and wisdom to make the next few months manageable. I’m also very nervous that after being off, if I become pregnant, what if my anxiety goes out of control again? Are there any supplements I can take that help with mood changes, etc? I’m trying to have a plan in place for healthy outlets and management for my anxiety and emotions during withdrawal. Thanks all!
  24. I got off 75mg zoloft in about 2 months, had horrible withdrawal and went back on 2 months later on escetalopram. Got off escetalopram over the course of 2-3 months ish... wasnt a 10% taper but also wasn't too fast of a taper either. 6 months drug free and I experience anhedonia, and in those 6 months I had ***** up symptoms, unexplainable anxiety constant hyperarousal etc bunch of ****. Should I go back on escetalopram maybe? is it too late for me to reinstate?
  25. I feel devastated still - nearly 8 years after a brutally swift taper from Effexor. I did not know better then. Apparently nor did the doctor. Seven years at 150 mg of Effexor - then down to zero in about five days. Obviously my story is a lot longer than this and all kinds of hellzone has happened between then and now ... involving another drug I was forced on for many months because of the protracted withdrawal. (which these doctors do not believe in as you know) And I have only just learned that what is included in what I have been suffering for a while now, has a name - vulvodynia. (then there is the burning sensation throughout various parts of the rest of my body). I am so scared because life is over if this is all there is now. Surely there is some kind of wonderful holistic herbal miracle remedy to take or something - a solution for CNS damage. I am drug-free now and want to stay that way and wish I always had been. Unbelievably for all of those years I didn’t really know what I was really taking - I never gave informed consent. If I had the knowledge then I would never have given consent at all. Meanwhile I need to heal or there is no life left.
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