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  1. I was put on 2.5mg of Olanzapine for racing thoughts/anxiety and as a sleep-aid. I was mostly taking 1.25mg though. I wish I had done the research before taking it!! I would have never taken it if I had known it would be like this, and cause such changes to the brain. So, I've decided to just stop taking it cold turkey, as I figure that having only been on 1.25mg - 2.5mg for most of the 3 weeks, and... (5.0 for 2 days near the end) it for 3 weeks total, it's best to just stop without adding length to the drug being in my system. The dose I've been taking is small also, however, I am very medicine sensitive. I'm so worried about side-effects from withdrawing... I was using the phone and laptop last night until 3am to distract me until I felt relaxed enough to try and get some sleep, which I eventually did at about 3.30am. I was researching all about Olanzapine withdrawals and looking at many videos people posted on YouTube regarding this. It was slightly comforting. I had very vivid dreams, as I have been having on the Olanzapine, only they somehow felt even MORE vivid. I can still remember the dreams easily enough if I try and this makes me feel anxious as I experience derealization/depersonalization every day I feel. I woke up a few times this morning. First at about 6am. Felt like absolute crap. Depression, comparable to the “come down” after a high from ecstasy etc. Managed to sleep again, even with an anxiety-induced racing heart, falling into that vivid dream-filled, seemingly shallow sleep. Woke again before my wife got up at 8am, but once again, managed to fall asleep before she left the house. It’s 12.15pm now, and I feel very depressed. I feel no joy and I have anxiety that is bubbling behind this cloud of depression. Obsessive, intrusive thoughts are frequent, and I don’t want to do anything at all today. I feel so very low. I find it extremely difficult to even write this, but I’m trying as I know it is something positive, to be keeping track of my progress. I really hope I feel better soon. I’m very nervous about what to expect. I feel like it can’t get worse than this, as I feel absolutely hopeless, with no happy feelings…I’m just so depressed. I’ve been thinking about trying Effexor XR, as I’m experiencing this crippling feeling of depression, and I’ve been feeling about the same way for the past 3 days, give or take. I actually started feeling this low after I re-commenced on Olanzapine 2.5mg after a 2 day trial of withdrawing from it after I took one 5mg tablet. I started feeling this low after taking that last 2.5mg tablet. Well, that’s all I have to write for now. I feel so low… (My question to people who have successfully stopped Olanzapine) - Will I ever feel ok again? Will I find the old me..? Is 3 weeks and the dose I've been on not small..? I was taking it for 3 weeks, and mostly (for about 75% of those 3 weeks) 1.25mg (splitting 2.5mg in half) along with taking 0.625mg (splitting the 2.5mg in half) as I’m very med sensitive and nervous in general about medication. UPDATE on DAY 2 of Olanzapine WIthdrawal It is now 5.10pm in the afternoon. I am still feeling depressed and have racing thoughts which are causing me anxiety on a high level. I feel like I have lost myself, and I'm afraid that I won't be happy again. This depression is so bad that I managed to talk to a psychiatrist in the day hospital and she prescribed Mirtazapine 7.5mg (taking half of 15mg). I really hope this will help me through this, as I am feeling rather hopeless and lost... Has anyone used antidepressants to ease coming off of Olanzapine? Thanks. UPDATE on DAY 3 I slept from some time after 1.30am while listening to a YouTube video. My sleep felt very shallow with vivid dreams, which I can't recall clearly now, but I don't think they were particularly good dreams. Woke up at 6am. Immediate panic. Still empty, no, worse... no feelings at all, just fear/panic. Perhaps this is due to my receptors being messed around with from the 3 weeks on Olanzapine? Is 3 weeks enough time to do irreversible, permanent damage to the brain? I wish I had some answer... I used my phone to watch videos of people's journey of withdrawing. I couldn't seem to find enough. I continued to watch videos until about 9.30am when I got out of bed with my wife. It is 10.20am now. I'm trying to remain active, even though doing things is just so difficult! I washed the dishes. I managed to eat a banana. My wife made me a cup of hot milk. Thinking about eating food makes me feel quite nauseated. I have zero appetite. My thoughts don't seem to stop. I wonder about the point of existence. Humans as creatures - what, really, is the point? I have depersonalization and derealization for at least 4 months now, and I think about every little thing I do or see... I'm just so tired and stressed! I'll continue to update. Thank you everyone, and I hope to hear some friendly people! Shane.
  2. Hi everyone! I've been reading this forum for months and it has helped me immensely. I've been drug free for 6 months. Have had many WD symptoms that have come and gone, but the past few days have been awful. Headaches (brain pain is more accurate though) and brain shivers (very strange feeling, not sure how else to describe it), memory is all of a sudden awful, feel like I can't gather a thought in my head, feels like I won't be able to even remember my name, can't focus on anything for any length of time, brain humming sound at night (although this isn't new). I haven't felt this bad since I stopped. Has anyone else experienced this? Do things get worse before they get better? I thought that 6 months out the waves of WD would be easier than the previous months? I'm taking Vit D, Omega 3 fish oil, Vit C (just stopped to see if it was affecting my headaches etc). Thank you for creating this forum! I'm so grateful it exists and for any support. Trying to stay hopeful, but these past fews days have been challenging.
  3. Hello I live in Saudi Arabia. Male, mid 50s, married. I had taken SSRI (Cipralex 25mg) for 6 years. I tapered it for 5 months, then stopped it completely on March 29, 2016. Just to give you some background, I was living happily, never thought of taking AD drugs ever. However, one day, I was subjected to severe conditions that was beyond my control. This situation has caused me insomnia, because of the tremendous stress, and therefore, I started taking SSRI. The doctor, who prescribed it, was not so professional, because he wanted to give me any drug that would work for me, performing trial and error on me. I know that AD drug is not a treatment, but rather a chemical stuff that would screw up brain chemicals to calm me down so that I can go to sleep, and also to improve my mood. I was very much concerned with the withdrawal symptoms, but the doctor reassured me that it would last only 2 to 3 weeks. I believed him, but I wish I did not. He did not provide me a true honest advice. While taking the AD drugs, I developed some side effects: such as fever and PVC. Six years down the road, I noticed that I always want to go to sleep, even if I had just woken up in the morning and had my coffee. This has annoyed me and scared me, as I was afraid that this drug would cripple my life. At this point, I decided to quit and live my life free of AD drugs. The journey of WD suffering started on October 31, 2015. I tapered it for 5 months, and stopped it completely on March 29, 2016. Here is a time line along with my WD suffering: 1-6 months: things were bad, but tolerable. I experienced difficulties falling asleep, with anxiety. 6 mo-1.5 years: Severe symptoms began. It was so severe that I was thinking of going back to AD. I took it for one day, but then regretted that I did, and felt so bad for going back to the drugs. I decided to fight and continue my journey no matter what. I am glad I did. I do not know how I was able to cope with WD symptoms, but it has to do with my faith. Prayers, reading Quran, and reading positive comments that I used to write to myself. 1.5 – 3.25 years: Incremental improvements. Now, I can enjoy coffee and tea, and do my hobbies. I am not 100% recovered. I still have nasal congestion and tinnitus both of which have improved slightly.
  4. I'm writing to hopefully get some insight, see if anyone had problems they assumed were WD, but turned out to be something else that once addressed led to noticeable improvement, and see if anyone has symptoms not shared by most others here (i.e. my insane hunger/destroyed cues). Even if you don't read this whole post (long, sorry) answering 2 or 3 would be great! Long story short, I was recovering from anorexia when put on Celexa. My body was unstable then, and the drugs made it worse. A month in I had increased hunger, looser bowel movements, insomnia, etc. Slowly I developed food sensitivities, dairy first, then gluten, and now it seems a whole host of things. Recently went to a gastro, was diagnosed with sibo. Took xifaxan for 2 weeks, saw some really good improvement the first week, then worsened the 2nd. Back to where I started before the antibiotic by now. I'm struggling to determine if the sibo is what has actually caused my food sensitivities, leaky gut, increased hunger, weight gain (really driving me crazy, especially since I worked so f***ing hard to gain weight/stay stable after anorexia), etc. or if my gut is just messed up b/c of the meds and sibo is a result, reinforcing the above issues. Part of me doesn't think it's entirely WD, since I don't see many people here with the problems I'm facing. But hunger, etc. problems got to be the worst both times I tapered before, slowly evening out to my state now (not driving me suicidal) which makes me think the sibo/issues are tied to WD (also since the sibo problems seemed to come back immediately after the antibiotic). I'm going crazy trying to figure everything out (between anorexia recovery, celexa side effects, and now WD, I don't know what 'stability' is). Keep messing around with my diet in the meantime, with little success. moderator note: SIBO = small intestine bacterial overgrowth
  5. Hi, I thought I would introduce myself. Have joined this forum after experiencing horrendous withdrawals from anti-depressants. I am 34, female. Currently 3 months completely off of Prozac which I took for 6 years at the highest dose I understand is allowed to be prescribed in the UK (60mg daily). I weaned down from 60mg to 0mg over 5 months. Have had 3 months of pure hell since stopping taking Prozac completely - symptoms ranging from suicidal depression, nausea, migraines, loss of appetite, the most debilitating anxiety and panic. Weakness, crying spells, the most excruciating emotional and psychic pain that I have ever had to endure. All the symptoms I have read others have experienced except I haven't had brain zaps - not sure why. Am determined to stay off of Prozac and just go through what I need to. Very grateful to have come across this forum and hopefully to be able to share how I am getting through and to hear how others have managed and hopefully to offer support too. I am aware that there seems to be no other way that through this - keen to connect with others who are finding a way through. Very keen to connect and speak further to anyone else having to go through this. Very determined to get through although very aware it feels like you just don't know what each day will bring or when you really are finally on solid ground. Very keen to hear others experiences. I am using the idea of windows and waves to navigate through currently. Very keen to connect with others. Natalie
  6. Scotty

    Scotty

    Drug History 2002 - Started Zoloft 100mg. Gradually reduced to 50mg, intending to come right off. 2009 - Went back up to 100mg - no ill effects. 2011 - Began slowly reducing again. 2017- Down to 25mg. October 2017- Dose increased to 50mg. I started taking Sertraline 100mg in 2002 because I’d developed panic disorder after a stressful mature-age college course. The medication worked immediately and continued to help me - I was well for 7 years with no anxiety. I gradually reduced to 50mg, but in 2009 went back up to 100mg with no ill effects during a life crisis. In 2011 I determined to come off again and began reducing very slowly with no ill effects. By October 2017 I was down to 25mg. I went to my GP to get a counselling referral. I was quite well with no anxiety, but she advised me to go back up to 50mg to mop up any underlying depression I might have. So I did - one of the worst decisions of my life! Within 24 hours I developed horrible symptoms... terrifying anxiety/dysphoria, palpitations, severe insomnia. I was certain they were caused by the increased dose of sertraline but my GP denied that this was possible ‘on such a small dose’. She said I woud soon adjust. So I stupidly continued to take it for 2 more weeks before another doctor in the practice told me to go back to my normal dose immediately. I was expecting that I would then return to ‘normal’ but I did not - instead I continued to suffer bouts of toxic anxiety as well as the other symptoms. I consulted other GPs and a psychiatrist - all reluctant to link my symptoms to the increased meds and instead going with the ‘pure anxiety’ diagnosis. Recently I found a GP who was willing to listen and referred me to a psychiatrist who tested me positive for clonus and hyperreflexia. He said that on the basis of these together with my other symptoms I definitely have non-acute sertraline syndrome. Although it is unusual, he thought it was triggered by the increased dose of medication in my system. He told me to titrate down fortnightly in 5mg increments using a solution. However when I got down to 15mg last week I soon developed withdrawal symptoms including ataxia, burning, nausea. But then yesterday I started to feel much better - almost normal! So this is my dilemma. I’m told that serotonin syndrome disappears soon after the medication is withdrawn. If that’s the right diagnosis then I should follow the 5mg taper and get off as soon as possible. But if this quicker rate gives me severe withdrawal then I should stick to the much slower 10% monthly regime - thereby possibly prolonging the agony. What to do? Can’t go forward, can’t go back! I’m so confused. I’d appreciate any help the forum can give me.
  7. I am coming off of citalopram for the second time. The first time was about eight months ago and I slowly weaned myself off. I still had a lot of side effects and emotionally was miserable. I was so irritable and snappy. I felt awful. I lasted eight months before my anxiety went up again and so after talking with my doctor, started back on citalopram 20 mg. I’ve now been on it for four months but want to wean off as I am planning to become pregnant and it was advised I should be off of citalopram before then. I’m really nervous because of how awful it was the last time but I am hopeful because I know what to expect, I can get through it. Just here looking for support and wisdom to make the next few months manageable. I’m also very nervous that after being off, if I become pregnant, what if my anxiety goes out of control again? Are there any supplements I can take that help with mood changes, etc? I’m trying to have a plan in place for healthy outlets and management for my anxiety and emotions during withdrawal. Thanks all!
  8. I got off 75mg zoloft in about 2 months, had horrible withdrawal and went back on 2 months later on escetalopram. Got off escetalopram over the course of 2-3 months ish... wasnt a 10% taper but also wasn't too fast of a taper either. 6 months drug free and I experience anhedonia, and in those 6 months I had ***** up symptoms, unexplainable anxiety constant hyperarousal etc bunch of ****. Should I go back on escetalopram maybe? is it too late for me to reinstate?
  9. I feel devastated still - nearly 8 years after a brutally swift taper from Effexor. I did not know better then. Apparently nor did the doctor. Seven years at 150 mg of Effexor - then down to zero in about five days. Obviously my story is a lot longer than this and all kinds of hellzone has happened between then and now ... involving another drug I was forced on for many months because of the protracted withdrawal. (which these doctors do not believe in as you know) And I have only just learned that what is included in what I have been suffering for a while now, has a name - vulvodynia. (then there is the burning sensation throughout various parts of the rest of my body). I am so scared because life is over if this is all there is now. Surely there is some kind of wonderful holistic herbal miracle remedy to take or something - a solution for CNS damage. I am drug-free now and want to stay that way and wish I always had been. Unbelievably for all of those years I didn’t really know what I was really taking - I never gave informed consent. If I had the knowledge then I would never have given consent at all. Meanwhile I need to heal or there is no life left.
  10. Hi everyone I was on Paxil 20mg for 19 years- most of which time it worked well (except for some weight gain and bloating). While studying at grad school I started taking Adderall for four years until it developed until a problem and managed to come off it inn July 2017. Went through the PAWs from that which lasted for a long time (and is maybe still ongoing). However, since I came off the Adderall, the Paxil appeared to have stopped working (either than or the PAWs from the Adderall was overriding its effects). So 5 months ago I decided to do the Prozac bridge to see if Prozac would work for me. I did a straight switch to Prozac 20 mg without any tapering and felt some withdrawals and also felt weird most likely from starting on the Prozac as well. While taking Prozac I have been up and down, with good weeks and bad. However, in the last two weeks I have had what seem suspiciously like the 'waves' I hear about on this site. I have felt the worst I have ever felt in my life and it seems very much like SSRI withdrawal to me (I've experienced withdrawals from Paxil several times before when I either ran out or tried to quit). This time symptoms include a sense of impending doom, nausea, tinnitus, hypersensitivity to stress, depression. It seems unusual to be suddenly hit with withdrawal symptoms 5 months after giving up Paxil and while still taking Prozac right? So my question is- is this some delayed withdrawal to the Paxil I stopped taking 5 months ago or is it some adverse reaction to the Prozac (even though I have had periods of feeling fine on it). I am leaning towards to the possibility of coming off the Prozac and reinstating the Paxil. Even though I was feeling pretty depressed when I was on Paxil last I didn't feel like this now where I basically feel like I'm losing my mind. Any recommendations on what I should do?
  11. I’ll keep the introductory story short since this is a forum about antidepressants and withdrawals. In June 2018, after being physically unhealthy and constantly stressed out for a couple years, I got depersonalization/derealization after smoking some marijuana. I kept having panic attacks because I wasn’t aware of what was happening with me, and those made the symptoms worse, inducing more panic. The downward spiral led to a visit to the doctor. I couldn’t take the nightly panic attacks anymore. He prescribed me 10mg Lexapro, thinking I just had depression and anxiety, which was bumped up to 20mg after a couple weeks. The side effects were exactly what you’d expect. I felt zoned out all the time, blunted emotions, increased appetite, gained 30 pounds, sexual dysfunction, fatigue. All of these side effects lessened after a couple months, but remained to an extent. The panic attacks stopped, the anxiety gradually calmed down, but the zoned out feeling became sort of indistinguishable from the depersonalization and derealization, which sucked and is why I really wanted to get off the medication, along with the weight gain and sexual side effects. The psychologist I see biweekly said this would be fine, and that 6-7 months on the 20mg dose was enough. I started my taper on February 1st, cutting down from 20mg to 15mg. The withdrawals were really mild. Basically I felt like I was coming down with a cold for 2 days, that feeling went away, and I didn’t feel any different than I had on 20mg. March 1st I cut down to 10mg. This time I had some electrical-like feelings in my face for a week, which went away. I started feeling a little bit more like myself. April 1st, cut down to 5mg. The electrical-like feelings spread to my arms, but went away after a couple weeks. On May 1st I stopped taking Lexapro. Here are the withdrawals I’ve gone through since stopping Lexapro: Electrical-like sensations throughout the whole body. These have almost entirely gone away now and are usually isolated to a hand or my face. Brain zaps. For some reason I only got these when moving my eyes from side to side. When they happened, my sense of hearing would momentarily change. The fan in my room would briefly sound like the ocean. Loss of appetite. When I was on Lexapro, I used to kill a mountain of food no problem. This was way higher than my appetite before Lexapro, so I guess this loss of appetite is somewhat normal, although sometimes I don’t care to eat now, even when hungry. Anger. This comes and goes, but wasn’t a big part of my personality before or while on Lexapro. I’m usually very agreeable. Most of my anger is towards the doctor who put me on this medication in the first place, in fear that the medication has put me into a deeper hole than I would be in right now had I been given an accurate diagnosis of panic attacks and depersonalization. ”Cortisol mornings”. Last week I had a few of these and they were devastating. I became obsessive about every withdrawal symptom and was convinced I will never recover from any of them. I had one this morning and it sucked. The fear is near the intensity of a panic attack, but not high enough to start one. No more insomnia. I’m a night person. Have been most of my life. Now I’m sleeping 9pm to 5am every night, with no difficulty getting to sleep. This could also be because I cut my caffeine from 4 pops to 2-3 pops daily. Caffeine just isn’t doing much for me right now, and I don’t want to ramp up my intake in fear of inducing a panic attack and getting thrown back into the worst of depersonalization, which has somewhat alleviated. Burning sensations. These typically occur in my feet very intensely, and moderately in my genitals and wrists. I suffered a bout of this last week for a few hours, and am suffering from it a little bit right now. Ear ringing. This happened quite frequently when starting the medication and would go on for around 30 minutes. Now it only lasts maybe 20 seconds at a very low intensity. This may not even be a withdrawal symptom. Sexual dysfunction. I won’t say I didn’t have genital numbness while on Lexapro. I most certainly did. But as I tapered this gradually reduced. Then after 2 weeks off of Lexapro completely, they went numb. After experiencing the burning sensations last week, I regained some feeling, and over the next couple of days I regained even more. Then a lot of feeling went away, but not totally, and some seems to have come back today as I’m experiencing the burning sensations again. I haven’t had any of the other sexual dysfunctions like erectile dysfunction, loss of libido, or delayed/no pleasure orgasms since the first few weeks of starting Lexapro. Floaters. Hate them. They’re also part of derealization. Flat emotions. This comes and goes like many of the other WD symptoms. Some days I’m pretty content, other days I feel complete dread, and sometimes I feel totally flat. Combined with depersonalization, this is a tough one. That’s pretty much it as far as my WD symptoms go. I’d have to agree with the observation here that most WD symptoms tend to come and go, but they’re less severe and don’t last as long during each wave, and my baseline seems to move towards recovery. Anyways, I know 10 months on antidepressants is baby level stuff to a lot of the members here and I just wanted to ask some questions about withdrawal because I’m kind of anxious. How long would you estimate my recovery from WD will take given the dose I took and the length of time I took it? I know there is no definitive answer, and giving me one would heighten my anxiety if that time came and went and I still had some WD symptoms, but a ballpark would be helpful. I’m 28 years of age. What can I do to speed up the process of recovering from WD symptoms? Right now I take a multivitamin daily, as well as some fish oil 2-3 times per day, and get 8 hours of sleep per night. I will admit my diet is crap, also tfw no exercise. Do any of the WD symptoms, such as burning sensations, numbness followed by feeling, leg tingling, etc indicate my nervous system is repairing itself? What can I do to help my nervous system go back to normal?
  12. Hi everyone, I wish i could say i am here to share a story of inspiration but my story is not such. I was prescribed zoloft at the age of 17 and went off back in November at the age of 39 after a very gradual 40+ week taper. At first i felt ok. The initial symptoms of withdrawal were mild, perhaps due to the fact that i was tapering down at only 5mg every two weeks. In January of this year (about 10 weeks after my last dosage) i began to experience quite severe anxiety. It was all day and persistent. After 4 weeks i returned to my GP and he suggested i go back on a low dose of zoloft until my CBT sessions began. He prescribed 50mg of Zoloft (1/3 of my regular dosage for 20+years) and to my shock after three days i went into an almost catatonic state of complete and utter panic attacks. I was immobilized by panic. My doctor told me to stop immediately and also prescribed Klonopin to help with the immediate anxiety. After i was stabilized he prescribed a low dose of Citalopram and the same thing happened after a few days. More Klonopin and no SSRI's. I weened very quickly off the benzo and was then walloped with the most severe insomnia of my life. After 4 days without any sleep the doctor (now a psychiatrist i was seeing) said to continue the benzo and added Lyrica (pregabilin) to help ween off the benzo while thwarting the insomnia. After three hellish months i was finally off the benzo and am currently now weaning off the lyrica. Every step of the way has been hell for me. I'm inside of an existence that has become a rollercoaster of anxiety, depression, fear and nausea, intermingled with short periods of normalcy. All along i thought that this experience was the benzos and lyrica and reemergence of old symptoms but only recently stumbled upon info about protracted withdrawal from ssris--which amazingly is completely off of the radar of the medical profession, as i'm sure most of you know. I'm currently living in a state of hyper vigilance as i never know when in the day i'll suddenly be walloped with severe anxiety and i always feel apprehensive at bedtime hoping i'll sleep ok. The worst part of this whole situation is that i don't know with any certainty that this current state i'm in will ever end. There have been many many days over the last 7 months where i have thought about death as the only relief from this predicament. I'm very lucky to have an amazingly loving and supportive wife who continues to hold me up and a couple of close friends who know what i'm going through. This keeps me going--barely. I struggle with feelings of deep resentment toward the medical and pharmaceutical fields for leading me to this place that i'm in. I wouldn't wish this hell on my worst enemy. I'm glad i found this site. I'm here to find some hope. I'm here to hopefully find stories from others who are in a similar predicament who have found recovery. I need to recover because this is no way to live. I do not want more meds (and doubt i can take them anyway at this point) Thanks for the opportunity to share my story.
  13. Hello Thank you for accepting me in to this group. I have always faced adversity and never ever took any medication. I always felt these were life situations that all of us must face - and that there isn't a fast fix - only time will heal - which it always had. But when my son was diagnosed with Acute Lymphoma Leukemia - I forgot all about the above and listened to my GP to take something for this pain that hurting my very soul. So I took Zoloft and stayed on it for 8 years - Then on December 3, 2011 - my GP and I decided it was time to start tapering off Zoloft. Unfortunately Zoloft only comes in 25, 50 and 100 mgs in capsule form. I had to taper 25 mgs at a time, albeit I stayed on that amount for 4 months at a time. Took a year and a half to finally get off it, which was on May 17, 2013. My tapering experience: I had litte WDs in the beginning - first was the dizziness, arms and legs ached, headaches, groin pain to the point where I had a hard time walking, indigestion, - all these symptoms except the dizziness and headaches disappeared. I was coping quite well all through withdrawals - but I didn't know what was coming, was not prepared at all. When off completely May 17, 2013 - again for a couple of months still able to cope with WDs. Then around 6 months off - WDs seem to get worse - visual disturbances, anxiety, worsen headaches, lightheadedness - pins and needles all over my face and chin, daily migraines, tight band around my head - DP, crying all the time - night sweats - morning anxiety - All these symptoms started mildly around the 6th month period off - then they just got worse and worse and around 18 months of until now there has been no let up at all. Day after day with high anxiety, crying every day, distorted vision in one eye I think caused by the headaches. I am literally in hell - and I wonder if maybe I will be like this for the rest of my life. Also recently I have lost a person whom I love so much, never to see that person again. I think my WDs are even worse now because of it. There is no hope left in me...- Zoloft is the only medication I have ever taken and do not take anything at all - not even vitamins.
  14. Hi guys, So here I am after being off antids for about 6 months, having tapered too quickly and suffering the consequences. I was latterly taking Citalopram 30mg, Lamotrigine 150mg and Venlafaxine 75mg. Summer 2015 I was officially diagnosed with major depression, which had obviously been there for a long, long time but had at that time got particularly bad. This was due to psychological issues, alcohol and drug abuse but wouldn't shift despite years of work fixing these. Now I know the long term citalopram use was probably making the depression worse. Around that time I saw 4 different psychologists and got 4 different opinions on how to recover/which meds to take. This of course was a ridiculous situation so I took matters into my own hands, taking what I thought was the 'best' advice and integrating it with my own research and experience . Following the 'advice' of one of the psychiatrists I added 75mg of Venlafaxine to the Citalopram and Lamotrgine. At the same time I'd heard about l-methylfolate so gradually ramped up to 15mg daily with b-6 and b-12. I know starting 2 things at once is not advisable but I was desperate and could hardly function. Within a couple of weeks something kicked the worst of the depression into touch which was a massive relief. After a couple of months on the 3 med cocktail the side effects were really starting to get to me so it was time to get off this stuff. Yes, I know, I did it all too quickly which is why I am where I am now....I should have listened more closely to the advice here :-) Hoping for a little advice and encouragement about my nervous system which in the last 3 months or so has got worse even though I stopped all meds 6 months ago. The lamotrigine taper had me shouting angrily at my wife a number of times - the intensity of the rage was incredible but passed quite quickly. She was very brave to be able to get through that! Citalopram taper was surprisingly easy. The final stages of the Venlafaxine withdrawl was tricky. I was down to 1 bead and if I didn't take it within a few hours I'd get head zaps, restless legs etc. At some point I had to stop so I did and put with these symptoms for a week or so. After all this I was however very fatigued which has improved to an acceptable level over the last 3 months. The fatigue was probably also due to recovering from the major depression. Right now I have anxiety issues, very easily stressed/snappy, can't sleep more than 5 hours a night and impossible to catch up with sleep during daytime as on the verge of dropping off I wake with intense terror/fear. Often trouble breathing properly, tight stomach and I am very sensitive to noise, light and touch. I also have panic attacks when the stress is high in my life. These have been occurring for a long time though and haven't really changed with changes in meds. Having done years of therapy and some bodywork I know that these are physical symptoms and I have quite a healthy psychological make up. I also do a lot of things to look after my physical and mental health which I won't go into here. On the plus side, I don't have the general low mood caused by taking Citalopram for years, blurred vision, muscle tightness, sexual problems, cognition and memory problems, sense of not being fully present + other well known side effects from these meds. I am having thoughts about re-introducing a very small amount of Citalopram or Venlafaxine - not sure which one of these is causing the nervous system issues - probably both. I'm aware that the likelihood of this helping after 6 months is low, but I'm willing to try to alleviate symptoms. Advice on this is very welcome! As my name suggests, I do finally feel alive after 16 years on these meds - something about taking them was just not 'right'. Even though I'm suffering right now I'd rather be here. I hope this gives some encouragement to others and also serves as a warning about what happens when you taper too quickly! Thanks to mods and users alike for this wonderful resource. Cheers
  15. 6 years ago had baby number 2. Ended up post natal. They put me on sertraline. Wasn't working on me great so eventually went up to 200mg. Since Dec 14 I tapered off. Finishing in April 15. I've been suffering with anxiety and tears negative thoughts ever since. In waves and windows. Now nearing 7 months and going through a wave if tears last week and this. I feel maybe I should go back on but my heart of hearts and also hubby and friends say stick it out as I have good days too. Mornings are bad at times.
  16. Hello. My name is A and up until 2007, I was a happy well adjusted individual (loving, caring and with a huge amount of empathy for others) with a young family, who was very content with life. Due to an situation at work, I became anxious, and this anxiety did not subside. I visited my doctor, who immediately prescribed Citalopram (Citalex) - will hereafter refer to as C). My doctor did not suggest getting off these as soon as possible, instead recommending I stay on them in case I had a relapse (do they recommend cancer drugs to patients in remission). The possible consequences of this course of action were never explained to me. I have been on them pretty much ever since (and when they were working they worked fine), but I have had several attempts to get off them, with no success. I instead became depressed and was put back onto C. My most recent attempt was in mid-December 2016, and initially things appeared to be going OK, in that is I was functioning as would be expected, but without the medication. Unfortunately, my mood deteriorated. I was again signed off sick from work, and despite a further prescription of C (which I have discovered I can now not tolerate - instead it gave me severe headaches and made me confused) I am now totally anhedonic. The question I would like replies to address is whether this state is likely to be permanent, and if so, how do those in a similar sad situation cope with never feeling any pleasure whatsoever. I know I love my family, but there is no "warm fuzzy" feeling inside, just this deadness, whereas before there was love and empathy. What do other forum members feel has been the cause of their depression - life in general (with its ups and downs) or the fact that they have been on an antidepressant for a long time without which, ultimately, their body could not function, i.e. it was the drug itself that led to a depressive state?
  17. 9 months ago today I took my last Prozac and I am still dealing with withdrawal. I took 15 mg of Fluoxetine for 12 years from PAR pharmaceuticals. In July 2015 the fluoxetine I received from the pharmacy was from TEVA pharmaceuticals, apparently PAR pharmaceuticals discontinued the tablets I was taking. Well, my body did not react well to the TEVA brand. I started having nausea and tremors. After a couple of days on the TEVA brand I switched to the MYLAN brand but nothing changed. Realizing my body was not going to handle the change I decided to taper but it seemed pointless because my body was in withdrawal from the PAR pharmaceutical fluoxetine my body was use to taking. On August 27th 2015 I took my last pill. From July to November I dealt with nausea and tremors and then all hell broke loose. On top of the nausea and tremors I developed a bad smell in my nose that only I can smell, internal shaking that is constant, the nausea got much worse, I started having hot flashes, night sweats, insomnia and chills. I also have cried almost every day since November. In December I had a gastric emptying study done due to the nausea and lack of appetite. I discovered I now have delayed gastric emptying. To date I have lost 44 pounds from the nausea and not being able to eat. I have also had a CT scan and an MRI for the tremors and internal shaking. Those results were normal. I have seen an ENT for the bad smell in my nose, but they can find nothing wrong. I have noticed that I am feeling a tiny and I stress tiny bit better but I still have the internal shaking, nausea, bad smell in my nose and crying. I have read about internal shaking in withdrawal but how long does it go on. I was put on Prozac for panic attacks and the constant internal shaking is making me feel panicky and anxious. Does anything help with it? Has anyone else experienced a bad smell in their nose or heard of anyone having a bad smell in their nose during withdrawal? Thank you for any advice or help anyone can offer me.
  18. Hi to all I'm Chuck, Italian guy of 33 years old, have PSSD after adverse reactions to Citalopram 7 drops of 3 years ago,now I'M total drug free I'm Old pp members, I hope someone remember me in these years I had some improvement better erections, more sensitivity. My story of AD and psychiatric drugs start around 2001, in my first college years I have degree in Biology and now I'm in the third year of MD school, for some months in 01/02 psichyatry put on me on Amisulpride and Seroquel, and After mutabon mite(amytryptaline) and i stay on It for 3 months, i try some SSRIs but I always vomit it at the first dose, after this evrything gos is fine, and I stay drug free for around 10 years, in december 2013 after a period of discouragement I go to psychiatric and he is prescribed me Citaloprom 10 drops, I take only 7 drops and I have horrible adverse reaction with 11 discharges of diarrhea and since I developed in PSSD. But on Monday I had a virtual colonoscopy, for rectal bleeding due to hemorrhoids, Virtual colonoscopy did not find anything abnormal, no polyps, and no cancerous lesion, the colon is perfectly clean and healthy. But the preparation for Virtual Colonoscopy was brutal, I used two laxatives , one Lovoldyl pill, and 3 glasses of Lovol ESSE (polyethylene glycol ), I think is the same product of Miralax, I had a serious adverse reaction to this product with Eighteen discharges of bloody diarrhea abdominal pain and cramps that I have and even PSSD symptoms seem worse, and despite this strong rectal bleeding due to inflamed hemorrhoids, the doctor decided to make the virtual colonoscopy, drenching with less air. Can this preparation for colonoscopy have worsened PSSD? I read that the polyethylene glycol is neurotoxic, and can damage the kidneys, I am very afraid of developing kidney damage in the future, this is possible? I'm also afraid of not being able to eat and drink as before, or develop Diverticulosis another possible side effects of colonoscopy,I have strong pangs in the stomach and burning, I have read of people after the colonoscopy for years can eat only liquid food, This screening for early detection of cancer is very barbaric, and brutal, both the classic version and virtual, it would definitely prohibited and find safer alternatives. Thx to all.
  19. Hi all, thanks for having such an amazing and helpful forum!!! I was prescribed Venlafaxine (Effexor) for anxiety and depression (moderate in my opinion). I started taking it. I'm so stupid... I had read about withdrawal symptoms, but I wasn't imagining it as so awful. After 5 days I got bleedings from the uterus, even though my period wasn't due. They were about as strong as a normal period, but more painful. The GP (doctor) made me stop Effexor. After 2 days I started to have the symptoms everyone reports: Crying, suicidal, self harming, fits of rage, nausea, dizziness, heart racing, trouble breathing. My GP didn't know anything about withdrawal symptoms and wanted to admit me to the psychiatric hospital. I sent him a bunch of information and finally convinced him to leave me alone and deal with it myself. I think he feels a bit guilty now, but that doesn't help me.... It's day 9 after stopping and my brain is still totally messed up. Question to you all: Do you think I need to go back on Venlafaxine and taper down slowly to prevent lasting damage to my brain? I also got some Sertraline from the GP, which I could use to switch to temporarily. I think even if the bleeding comes back, I can handle it. Iron values are ok. I had thought that after just 5 days of taking Venlafaxine, the withdrawal should be short and mild. But after reading a lot, I'm getting a bit scared. Any advice welcome! Laura PS: I really think I had a guardian angel who sent me those bleedings and made me stop before I took the medication for longer.
  20. Greetings! I am very fortunate I found this site. I will not go into to much detail but here are some facts about my current situation. I have had anxiety/panic my entire life, from the earliest I can remember I used to have horrible separation anxiety, agoraphobia, and just plain being scared of silly things, like when I was younger I was terrified of thunderstorms and elevators I had to do exposure therapy while I was little and that was pretty difficult but it defiantly was not enough. My mother didn't put me on pharmaceuticals until I was 12 or so because the SSRIs were fairly new and she wanted to wait as long as she possibly could do try one of these medications. Flash forward to 2005, my father dies on the treadmill right in front of me, I am still in high school, and my anxiety up to that point was manageable, put when that happend my anxiety went through the roof. I couldn't finish high school in public but I was fortunate enough to have some retired teachers come to my house so I could graduate with my class. Of course during this time I was seeing a psychiatrist. Now he is an intelligent man and I have a number of medications to be thankful for, especially getting me out of that trauma. I was on a Tricyclic Anafranil 150 mg, from 2006 to 2013 for anxiety. During November 2013, I tried getting off the medication because it wasn't working and it was effecting my speech (probably from the anticholinergic effects). I tried to get off of it several times before but was given bad withdrawing advice (cut dose in half and 2 weeks you will be good), well that never happened of course. The old, see you need your medication, none of these brain zaps you speak of cannot occur with these drugs. So I followed the doctors advice and continued taking the Anafranil for a few more years. In November 2013 I tried to get off Anafranil for good. I wanted to do half the dose but just stay on that dose for like a month and then go down another quarter or something and try it that way. I had no idea how wrong both the doctor and I were. As soon as I lowered the dose I became a basket case. I started crying for no reason, I lost a bunch of weight (about 25 pounds in a month), vertigo, heart palpitations which scared the crap out of me because my father died from a birth defect we were not aware of at 49. I went back to the psychiatrist who I had seen for 6 years and was slapped with a bi-polar diagnosis. After doing a lot of research and looking into these drugs I didn't realize that the withdrawal could be so severe, or that most doctors had no idea that these drugs were capable of producing such a profound effect upon discontinuation. I reinstated the drug after 6 months of shear terror and my heart rate returned to normal, my crying stopped and it was like none of it ever happened. Now my main concern is with my heart because part of my anxiety would be dying in a similar fashion my father did. I have a great cardiologist who I have been seeing for years. He was fortunate enough to understand what was happening to me. I had every test imaginable and everything came back normal. Even when my heart was skipping a lot during the withdrawal, the holter monitor didn't pick up anything. He said its not so much your heart, its the receptors on your vagus nerve which is the main problem which makes since because they up regulate and down regulate depending if you are starting or stopping a drug. He said these drugs can effect the QT prolongation of the heart sometimes, but every EKG and Echo looked good so thank god for that. I stared back on the 150 in mid 2014 and currently I am on 60 mgs as of now. Now I think I misread because I tapered 10 mg every month instead of 10 percent of the dose, which is what a lot of people recommend. So what I am going to do as of now is try to stabilize on 50 mgs for a few months, since I am almost done with the 60 mg, and then taper down 5 mg every month which is roughly about 10 percent of the dose, I have calculated. I just hope this process goes a lot smoother than it did before because when I first tried my psychiatrists way it was absolutely horrible.
  21. Cherry47

    Cherry47

    I have had CFS for 32 years. Put on Zoloft 100 mg 14 years ago because 'it seems to help but nobody really knows why'. Certainly some help for the first ten years then seemed to have trouble tolerating other meds eg cholesterol meds, supplements, magnesium, sleeping pills albeit at low doses. Through process of elimination got down to the Zoloft, so stopped over a year although the last 50 to zero too quick I now realise. My introduction to hell! After 15 weeks, seemed to get a bit better but then relapsed. Around the 15 week mark out of sheer desperation I took half a sleeping pill (temazapan), great the next day, then slowly slid back. I have also taken some Q10 for four weeks for energy. Is that building up? Was it the temazapan? Is there any rhyme or reason to this? So hard to work out. Only medical advice different drugs and more of them! Has anyone with CFS been on this same roller coaster?
  22. I am 77 years old. I was prescribed 20mgs Prozac in 2013 to help with withdrawal from Xanax. When I had completed withdrawal in 2014 and wanted to stop Prozac psych said no - I was depressed and would have to take it for life. I had never had depression and the councilor I saw weekly for over a year agreed with me I had been miserable etc. but not depressed. I was on my own if I wanted to stop the Prozac. After a lot of research I did it very, very slowly (18 months) and changed to liquid fluxetine. I took last dose 10 months ago but still have withdrawal symptoms. I wondered if age had anything to do with it. I am sometimes not sure if its just old age that causes foggy brain. memory problems! Can anyone offer an opinion.
  23. Hey, I don't post much on here. I used to be a member on PaxilProgress. I thought I would start a topic to post some updates. I will post my original story and 3 year update below. The short version is that I took 10mg citalopram for situational depression (I had dropped out of college) for about 6 months and then I stopped. Ever since I stopped I went into hell and experienced some very debilitating symptoms. I am now just over 4 years off and I have been unable to work or live any kind of functional life during this time. In my update 1 year ago I was feeling optimistic at the time since I have been going through a little bit of a good period. Now 1 year later I feel less optimistic about my future. Since last year I have noticed very little improvement. The worst symptom for me is my inability to socialize which I fear will never recover. I always feel very withdrawn and act awkward in social situations. I have to think of what to say and try very hard to act normal. Before the drugs it just came naturally without thinking. This is a very strange symptom and I've not seen many other people mention it. It makes it very hard for me to have friendships with other people. I had a few periods early on where it went away almost completely for a week or so and it was as if someone turned a light back on in my brain. However, I have not really noticed any improvements in the past year. Something that is also very strange is that when I go into social situations for any period of time, it will trigger many symptoms and I will start to feel very bad. I wouldn't even believe it, if it wasn't happening to me but something as simple as socializing can cause physical symptoms. The symptoms generally don't come on till a few hours later. I will often notice my mood being lower than normal then I will start to feel cold and shivery and my appetite and sex drive will go down very low. In general I just feel very bad and know something is wrong. It generally takes a few days (away from social situations) before I feel back to normal. I also often get mouth ulcers. I have had about 2 or 3 a month on average for the past 4 years. They tend to go hand in hand with some pretty brutal fatigue where I just feel like I can barley lift my arms or do much of anything. Sexual function is also reduced from normal and intermittent. Sometimes my sex drive will feel close to normal but most of the time it's a little low. I have difficulty concentrating and find it hard to focus on things for any length of time. I also still have many other symptoms that come and go. I get migraines frequently, my appetite is often quite low even at the best of times, I often have digestion problems and constipation regardless of my diet. I feel like if I didn't have the social withdrawnness and symptoms triggered after a social situation then I could live a much more functional life despite the other problems. It is obvious to me that my brain is screwed up big time after going through all this for years. It's funny because I know if this had not happened to me and I was reading this then I probably wouldn't believe it was possible. I'd probably just think I am some crazy guy with social anxiety who is attributing it to drugs. I guess anyone who has been through this withdrawal knows how messed up the whole experience is. In the early period of withdrawal I read a success story by LossLeader that kept me going. He recovered after 4 and a half years. Now that I'm approaching that point I feel like perhaps these remaining symptoms are permanent. I guess I will need to hang in there for another year or two and see if things change or not. I have thought as a very last resort I may try and go back on the drug. Many of you will think that it crazy. I think it is as well. I don't even know if I would have the guts to do it. At the same time I think maybe I am just dependent on those drugs now and perhaps it would help me live a normal life for a while. I guess I would only consider that option if I knew for sure that I was never going to get any better over time and I felt like my life was still severely limited. I'll have to wait and see how things go.
  24. When91

    When91 lexapro

    Mudar para portuguêsFull screen closeI started using ssri in 2006 at age 14, however not always wore often used day in day not until September 2014 are already nine months ... right after I have stopped the use abruptly barely stayed for about a month, however after that I felt very well, very well, I thought q was healed, however a few days later returned it, two months later went to a party drank was barely even not drinking too much and the next day tava was better to eat a pizza and soon after started have severe pain in the gut and much much weakness, one week later I improved a little, one month after I came to feel again, however a little less intense, and improved again, however one month after I started to have arrhythmias that in Portuguese in medicine call extra systoles, it seems q heart will stop ... after a few weeks decreased intensity. in the new year was well drank got sick but improved then had fun on the beach ... weighed 85 kg this epoca..tenho 1,83m ... like my body was one of the few things q I had in me made me q well, at least help me with women ... used to do exercises outdoors ... however after a little while my nervous system began to show signs of failure and could not keep pace, and the TBM physical symptoms got worse and my body and muscles are desfezeram ... in two months I lost 15 kg, this was one of the worst things q happened to me ... right after I tried to recover but no point in, trained but the body or the nervous system not recovered until I saw that was useless to try ... it made me very badly why always imagined what I lost, especially the body ... now I do not have 1/3 of force q had no body even make hiking and so I speed makes me feel bad !! I never in my life imagined that one remedy would cause me so much misfortune, and I'm only 24, today is my aniverssario, but I'm not to celebrate, I can not drink with friends, I can not exalt me ​​emotionally, to fight with my parents and my cousin died have limited time, the withdrawal from lexapro not let me do anything at that age I wanted this living alone without my parents, however the Brazilian economy is very bad, and so'll be for a few years at least, I would have to have a job that pays well to support myself, go out for fun is also complicated, I am with the effects of the recession and also here is very violent, when I walk down the street can not relax, gotta look pros sides and always avoid certain streets, if they come to Brazil Please carefully ... I am now 70 kg with no power, with arrhythmias (danger but has not bothered), and already have nine months I stopped, and my parents did not believe in me that caused it lexapro and despair ...
  25. *moved from symptoms forum I'm 5 years now completel y med free, still have withdrawal, but symptoms come and go quickly, but the minute it gets cold weather, I start having brutal static electricity, Even my bottom of my leg touches car and gets shocked, i have of course had static electricity before withdrawal before. It seems worse since I went into withdrawal, has anyone else experienced this in withdrawal, a worsening of static electricity, and has anyone still had this worsening at 5 years?
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