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  1. Cigarettes at age 11. Alcohol periodically from age 13 to age 30. Valium episodically from age 18 to age 27. I have been on myriad anti-depressants since 1982 for major depression and generalized anxiety. Imipramine, desyrel, ativan. Off drugs from 1984 till 1995. Started Prozac 1995 till 2014 (did well from 1995 to 2011). Tried Wellbutrin, Cymbalta. Abilify and Trintellix from March 2014 till August 8, 2017 (depression free). Had to withdraw due to cervical dystonia and tremors which still persist. Terrible experience withdrawing from Abilify and Trintellix. Started Wellbutrin 150 mg. and Prozac 10 mg. for one week to help with withdrawal. Then increased Wellbutrin to 300 mg. and experienced ringing in ears; stopped the Wellbutrin and increased Prozac to 20 mg. (10 in A.M.; 10 in P.M.) Now on Prozac 20 mg. per day, occasional Propranolol for tremors (doesn't help). I've read that coming off Abilify can take up to 3 months or more, and it has been 2 months so far. I feel like I've spent (wasted) my entire adult life trying to feel better, first by self-medicating, then by psychiatric medicating. I'm 72 years old. I wonder if there is any hope for me.
  2. I've been on antipsychotics for nearly 20 years after I had a psychotic breakdown whilst I was taking an antedepressant and experiencing several major life stressors. I've tried to withdraw numerous times but have always become psychotic very quickly. My memory has been affected, I now have diabetes and my weight soared as I put on 10 stone. I'm here because several people recommended this site. I currently take 300mg amisulpride plus medication for diabetes, high blood pressure and high cholesterol.
  3. Hello, my name is Manny. I was diagnosed 0CD and schizophrenic in 2008, but I been taking benzos and amiptriptiline since 2005. Currently,taking abilify 20mg,risperidone 2mg,cymbalta 60mg,biperiden 4mg. I am tapering klonopin down to 0,27mg from a dose of 1,25mg. I went to see my doctor this week because a blood test that I did. He said my hepatic transaminases are high because of the medication that I take. I am assuming the APs that I take. What can I do to get my liver function well? I know, quitting the APs, but I can t cold turkey. Any advice,please.
  4. Hi. I'm new here. Here are the basics of my story. I had been on 150mg of Zoloft for 17 years for dysthymia and generalized anxiety disorder. I decided to taper off, with the blessing of my pdoc. My depression and anxiety returned, and I had to not only increase the Zoloft to 200mg but add 1mg of Abilify (plus Konopin as needed). It's been a year and a half since the episode began and a year since starting Abilify. I'm feeling quite a bit better--I hardly ever take the Klonopin, and my pdoc said I can try doing without the Abilify. I just went 16 days at only 0.5mg of Abilify, but I'm feeling anxious and depressed again and bumped back up to 1mg. I'm so frustrated with the whole situation. I'm working hard to recover: I'm in weekly therapy, I run just about every day (3-6 miles), and I meditate almost daily. I don't want to come off the Zoloft, just the Abilify. Maybe I won't be able to, in which case I need to come to terms with that. Any comments or questions would be greatly appreciated.
  5. Hi All, Diagnosed schizophrenic here currently on a 300mg depot injection of Abilify monthly until March 2016, on a community treatment order. Am doing everything I can to get off medication ASAP, as am experiencing akathisia, anhedonia, complete loss of libido, numbness, and a loss of spirituality. I'm sure most of you know how horrible this can be, especially when previously I was a healthy & happy, loving guy full of life and energy. In total I'll be on the abilify for a year, what are my chances of recovery? Has anyone in a similar position ever come off medication and found their voices to return (mine were extremely loving, and quite special to me)? Could anyone provide me with tips to detox/cleanse, or peace of mind that I will recover? I smoke ciggarettes, take st johns wort, to try to counter the effects of the abilify, which help, along with numerous other supplements. Exercise regularly, eat as healthy as possible. Thanks for reading, I really appreciate any help or guidance on the topic of antipsychotics.
  6. Hello. I am twenty years old and had been on antidepressants since I was ten. From then on through my teenage years, all I knew was I needed to take my medicine . Once I was diagnosed with high-functioning autism, my pediatrician referred me to a neurologist. The neurologist then put me on respiradone and strattera. I don't remember if I had any behavior problems or not, but my neurologist told me I would have to be on medicine for the rest of my life. I stayed on those two meds until I got into high school. My first two years of high school, I couldn't stop crying. I cried day and night. My neurologist put me on celexa. When that didn't work, my neurologist told me he could no longer help me and referred me to a psychiatrist. I saw the new psychiatrist my junior year of high school who told me I had depression and anxiety that needed to be treated. I was taken off respiradone and strattera and put on pristiq and adderall. When pristiq wouldn't work, I was switched back to celexa. So it went on, switching back and forth between antidepressants. There were so many different ones I can't remember many of them. Every time I asked my psychiatrist if the next time it would work, he assured me it would. There was no chance to talk when I saw my psychiatrist. It would result in a new prescription every time. During my senior year, I helplessly slept through every class, sometimes falling out on the floor asleep. I had a good school counselor who allowed me to pass because she knew it was the medicine and I got plenty of sleep. I also cried uncontrollably almost every day in front of everyone and it was very humiliating as I would stir up a lot of attention. My senior pictures of me showed a person with a puffed up and swollen face. I was switched to lexapro again and stayed on it my whole first year of college. Then the crying returned. During my second year, I was switched to Abilify for depression. I still trusted my psychiatrist as he again promised me it would work. Out of all my experiences with antidepressants, there is nothing that could ever have compared to this. As soon as I took the first dose of Abilify, my brain signaled to me something was very, very wrong. I began receiving no sleep. My psychiatrist put me on trazadone for that, but when I took it, my body fell completely limp, my heartbeat slowed down to almost nothing, and I went numb while my body shut itself down. I stopped it after two nights. Meanwhile, with abilify, I began spending all my time obsessing over things I would normally never touch. I believed I was an alien hybrid sent from outer space to save the planet. I also believed the human race are all aliens in disguise. Then I started going mad. I didn't want to be a human anymore. I wanted to be a supernatural creature with otherworldly capabilities. This was all extremely terrifying to me, but I couldn't stop myself. I lost my common sense as I believed these nonsensical theories. My mind was overpowering me with racing thoughts such as these listed. I couldn't think clearly. I was almost always in a state of rage. Reasoning had left me. For reasons I do not remember, I stopped Abilify by myself cold turkey. My psychiatrist had told me before that I never needed to worry about tapering because the antidepressants I took were all in the same family. He never mentioned stopping completely. Withdrawal symptoms didn't show up until a week later. My psychiatrist told me they would last 15 days. They were relatively minor, and I didn't worry much about them. However, nothing could have ever prepared me for the horror I underwent next. Every horror I could have never imagined bestowed me over the course of a month. I received no sleep. I was very lucky if I got one hour. The nights soon got from bad to worse. I developed REM sleep disorder. I was unable to tell the difference between being awake and asleep. As my mind was drifting, I jumped up in the air, screamed, swung at the air, and thrashed violently all over. In addition, my head would suddenly snap up and I would shout melancholy indistinguishable language and suck in sharp breaths. I was aware of everything, but I had no control over it, and it was very disturbing to me. Then came the uncontrollable muscle movements. My lips drew up on the sides, my mouth gaped open, my lips puckered and pouted, my teeth bared, my tongue stuck out, my neck extended, my eyes bulged, my eyebrows rose and lowered, my hands flapped, my arms swung, my knees jerked, my head jerked side to side, and my fingers extended. Shouts, grunts, moans, and gasps escaped my mouth. Several weeks went by as more horrendous symptoms appeared. Every day I was a zombie. I could only do basic human activities. I had no awareness of the passage of time. At night while drifting off, a dark shadowy presence swept over me. I was aware of where I was in real time while drifting, but I sensed a sudden danger. I jumped up alert every time. I heard a voice I believed to be God's telling me why I was like this and what I needed to do. It spoke to me relentlessly for days. When this occurred, an otherworldly and overwhelming sense of peace filled my every being. But it was always soon replaced by a terror so surreal I could not function. During this time, I could "see" my brain and I believed I was in control of what I allowed to be let in. After four days of this, I ordered the voice to "Get out!" It did and did not come back. Right after this, a veil suddenly covered my mind and I was disengaged from reality. I had no sense of where I was and I had no connection with my parents. I was always mad, crying most of the time, and my head was always jerking. I saw my psychiatrist for the last time two months ago. The doctor who had been nice to me all this time suddenly turned mean. He told me he refused to see me unless I got on medicine. By this time, I had found this site and many other websites about withdrawal. I knew I wanted to try living a better life and I was not backing down. I never took the newly prescribed anti psychotic he prescribed me. A week later, my parents, exasperated with how I was doing and on their last straw, called my psychiatrist. My dad told the psychiatrist I had read on the internet how long the withdrawal really is and the doctor spoke with me on the phone. My psychiatrist told me that the withdrawal symptoms I was describing were "all in my head" because the medicine would already be out of my system now six weeks later. He told me I needed to get on medicine right now because "I needed help". He told me my quality of life was not as good without the medicine. I was in another rage episode by this time, and unlike me, I confronted him. I said "Well why are a lot of these the same symptoms I experienced during the so-called withdrawal time?" He said he didn't know and preceded to ask me was I on drugs. I was in disbelief that anyone would ask such a thing. I have not spoken to that psychiatrist since. I am dealing currently with a lot of physical and mental symptoms but none I would describe as severe as that horrible nightmare of a month. (That month just happened to be timed perfectly with my Christmas break.) My mouth, head, and fingers jerk, but never as exaggerated as they were the first month. I dealt with extremely numb fingers, feet, and ankles up until two weeks ago. My ankles at times felt like they were hanging by a single nail. My feet, bluish-green, were so numb and swollen I had no feeling and shooting pains shot up my legs. I was extremely dizzy for so long. My gp told me I have low blood pressure. I started having panic attacks. Anxiety crept over me for no apparent reason. I cried a lot. I felt hopeless. I am dealing with apathy, anhedonia, akathisia, and cognitive problems. My memory has not been well during this whole time. I am not aware; I'm just wherever I am. I have lost perception of sight, hearing, and touch. I do things I'm supposed to do because I know that's what I've always done. I cannot connect feelings to memories; I have to rely on pictures and journals from over the years. I had to look back in my journal to refresh my memory of this whole experience which I happened to write down. I have been disconnected with myself...it was worse in the beginning. I would look at pictures of myself and couldn't connect that it was me. The whole first month of withdrawal my face was so puffed up I thought my skin would fall off. Sometimes things look bigger or smaller than they appear. My thinking ability is limited. I went to my gp again three weeks ago and I was low on vitamin D. I am currently on iron medicine, vitamin d supplements, allergy medicine, and multivitamins. Although the numbness has gone away, I am extremely faint and have weak tremors every day. At night I'm miserably exhausted. My heart is always beating fast and hard. I get chills and my body tenses up. I'm not sure if I should be concerned about any of this. I cold-turkeyed Abilify four months ago. I have managed to keep my grades up in college since then and so far have maintained a perfect attendance. Some days are harder than others, but I try to count my blessings as I've heard stories far worse than my own. I am only beginning to understand what I am dealing with. The last thing I would want is to ever take another antidepressant and hinder this process. I feel like I have a real sense of myself now and I feel more in control. I have no idea how long this will last or if it will ever go away but I try to maintain a positive attitude about it as things slowly get better. I have faced the fact that I can't change my past but I can certainly shape my future. I apologize for the long story. It is difficult to get my thoughts together.
  7. I started Abilify 3 months ago and it has done very little depression wise, but has definitely given me akathisia, muscle twitching, and increased anxiety. I am currently taking 2mg and wish to taper off as safely as possible. I’d like to use liquid if possible. Any advice, dosing schedules, success stories would be greatly appreciated.
  8. Hello, I really appreciate seeing everyone's stories and strategies, and it helps to know that I'm not alone. I am in my late 20s and have been on and off many meds since a hospitalization for depression in 2005. By fall of 2016, when I started the “taper”, I was on 4 medications: Cipralex 20mg, Adderall 30-40 mg, Abilify 2mg and Wellbutrin SR 200 mg. The first 3, I think I was taking for around 2 years after numerous failed treatments including various meds and rTMS; however, I have been taking the Wellbutrin for 12 years. On that regimen of 4, from something like 2014-2016, my mood was generally in-check but my life was beginning to fall apart. I graduated and got a full time job in the summer of 2016, but I was having horrible energy crashes randomly during the day. Sometimes I couldn't keep my eyes open or stay seated. I struggled socially. My memory and attention were affected, and I would cry randomly. I had trouble believing it could be from the meds because they were supposed to do the opposite. In Sept 2016, I was off work and on disability. It was an incredibly confusing situation, and everyone, including myself, blamed my brain. Soon after that I began having a gradual and profound shift in perspective as I realised that meds may have been more of a problem for me than a solution. At some point in the fall of 2016, I started my withdrawal journey. First, I stopped the Cipralex over a few weeks, and became incredibly anxious. It was really horrible; I would get spells of pacing and yelling at myself. I couldn't meditate or do anything to calm down anymore. After a few months of that, I then tapered the adderall over around a month. At that point, I became really exhausted, was getting frequent (but not ER level) suicidal thoughts, and had trouble doing anything. I eventually got accepted for a volunteer job to which I had previously applied, and reinstated half of the adderall to function. However, I was scared that the tolerance crashes might come back, so my doc switched me to Vyvanse 20-30 mg. It was smoother but I was still concerned that it was not a long-term solution. I finished the volunteer job, then I read about things that other people had tried and decided to do some lifestyle changes. I stopped sugar and gluten and got outside a lot. Then I tapered both the vyvanse and the abilify at the same time over around 2 months. It was not as bad this time, and after a few more months off of them, I was mostly able to concentrate and wasn't getting very many dark thoughts. My emotional depth and variety, as well as cognition, were even beginning to improve. Once I could sort of focus again, I decided to try the paleo/keto diet and taper the wellbutrin. The problem with wellbutrin is that I have unsuccessfully tried to stop it numerous times over the past decade by following the traditional taper advice. Each time ended with me falling into an awful depression a few weeks later, and eventually back onto the med. I had been convinced that this was evidence of a chronic underlying depression, but now reading other people's stories, I'm going to be optimistic and assume that it was delayed withdrawal. So, I felt a little better on the paleo diet and dropped the WB dose from 200 mg to 100 mg on Oct 25, 2017 (right before I found this forum). I then became very sluggish with low motivation, but after a few weeks I was able to get out of bed in the morning again and do a few things. It's been 5 weeks now and no terrible-delayed-withdrawal-depression yet. I'm mostly just tired with trouble getting started on tasks. I asked for an extension on my leave from work to finish sorting this out. Surprisingly though, my difficulty connecting with people and obsessive thinking are improving in intermittently - I'm not sure yet if that's from going off the meds or from the changes in diet, but I greatly welcome it. By reading other people's success stories here, I learned that my best chance at becoming free from the Wellbutrin is to do the rest of my taper extremely slowly. I have an appointment with my doc next week to make a plan. This doc is good so it should go okay. I would be interested to hear anything from you!
  9. Hello fellow SA members! I am curious to know if anyone has come off antipsychotics and gone onto antidepressants and recovered from antipsychotics? My pdoc says that she's had ppl recover in this situation, but I'm in disbelief. Any comments and info would be greatly appreciated. Thank you! Xo
  10. Hi Everyone! I consider myself the Kimmy Schmidt of internet forums, having been in seclusion for so long, but I grew tired of hiding . My disastrous dance with Big Pharma started in 2006, when I began hearing voices after months of anxiety and panic over a very traumatizing experience. Cops handcuffed me and placed me in four point restraints after I started screaming in public. The good young Doc at the local hospital they shipped me to gave me Zyprexa, never once asking if I had a family history of diabetes. I DC the drug after a week and about 5-6 months later I had another episode. 2007-2011 A true blur. 4 hospitalizations (two in 2007, one in 2008 and the last in 2011). Three months of sleeplessness due to Zyprexa withdrawal (someone in my life at that time told me that their family member discontinued cocaine in 3 days after years of abuse and I should due the same with Zyprexa - huge mistake), lost many friends due to neglecting their needs and my own, and a crazy amount of weight gain. My voices pestered me to the brink of despair. Yet, I still held on... 2011-2015 The breakthrough years. Switched from Zyprexa to Abilify without major impact on my sleep. Started working again although, not employed at this moment. After a spiritual breakthrough and addressing the demons of my past, I am on my way to permanently breaking up with Big Pharma. I attribute this breakthrough to trusting God and the guiding spirits, reading stories from those who have triumphed or in the process of triumphing over psyche drugs, and seeking support from family (although they still believe in the medical model of my so-called condition). Critical Psychiatry sites that delve into the rampant fraud and fear-mongering present in modern US Psychiatry also provided an alternative narrative to the chemical imbalance-broken forever label that my pdocs dumped on me. For the first time in years, hope blooms in my heart and mind. Will I be the same pre-drug woman? No and in many respects, I don't want to be. Those years in spite of the intensity of emotion that I felt and the warm and love in my heart, I could not take care of myself or establish healthy boundaries. Now I do a much better job of that. I don't eat as much sugar, and I have cut out caffeine and alcohol completely. I'm grateful for the victories, great and small. I want to document this journey for my brothers and sisters in the struggle and build community, because I believe in the healing power of relationships and knowledge sharing over BigPharma's so-called quickfixes. Also, I understand that I need to do the work on my own, to self-care regardless of my situation. A balancing act, for sure. Towards a drug-free me and a brighter tomorrow.
  11. Hi, i'm new to this forum, so forgive me if i make mistakes, i'm still learning. I'm about two years out from withdrawing off of Paxil that i tapered down on, and about one year from one situational exposure to benzodiazepines, and two years from consistent benzodiazepine usage (the klonopin,) as i withdrew both the antidepressant and the benzodiazepine at the same time. I am drug free for an entire year. The drugs tagged in my post are also drugs i have been previously exposed to, or had other exposures in the same class of drugs, (E.g, i have also been exposed to zoloft, prozac, and pristiq in the "Serotonin Reuptake Inhibitor" category over the course of 14 years, though paxil was my last exposure to an SSRI drugs.) For the sake of simplicity, i will spare the details. I am posting here today because i am struggling with a couple issues that the specialists i've seen cannot help me with, and i hope to find resources here. I have ruled out thyroid issues, cardiovascular issues, vitamin deficiency in standard ranges, and other infectious disease issues through doctors and testing. I am debating about seeing an endocrinologist, but have lost a lot of faith in medicine since my psychiatric outpatient stent and the answers for my health that continue to elude me. I have listed my main issues below: 1. Fatigue - From what i've read and am trying to understand, fatigue can be a huge factor in antidepressant and benzodiazipine post acute withdrawal because of potential effects on hormones and neurotransmitters. I've also read that amphetamine withdrawal, especially in the context of abuse can cause fatigue, but my exposure to amphetamines was a decade ago, so i don't know if that could still be a contributing factor or not? The fatigue seems to come on intermittently, i drink green tea to help with wakefulness as the fatigue can feel debilitating throughout the day, and i feel like my brain just doesn't want to function on all gears. I am also sensitive to caffeine - if i ingest more than normal it can send me into a panic attack. My intermittent benzodiazepine exposure last year was in part induced by too much coffee, but i used to drink a pot of coffee a day without too much anxiety on paxil. 2. Emotional Blunting - I know that emotional blunting is also a factor in both benzodiazepine and antidepressant use and withdrawal, but i am a little perplexed that i still feel difficulty with emotional attachment. I theorize that this may be due to the benzodiazepine withdrawal mostly, for the reason that benzodiazepines inhibit or prevent neurological recovery from trauma, from what i understand. Is it possible that my body and mind are still in a state of survival even two years out from antidepressant and benzos? I understand that the psychological trauma from years of being medicated may also play a key factor in trust and developing relationships, but that is a psychological piece that should resolve itself through counseling, CBT, once the body begins to function correctly again. My other theory is that all my exposure to drugs over the years, (especially in the context of intermittent antipsychotic and benzodiazipine exposure) has caused irreversible atrophy to the neurological circuitry that is responsible for those functions (pre-frontal cortex and frontal lobe?) I'm looking for any input, resources, or suggestions that might help with those pieces Thanks, - NR EDIT: I don't have any recreational drug exposure either, all my drug exposure has been exclusively psychiatric with the exception of alcohol on a few celebratory occasions. I have also had antibiotic exposures on three separate occasions in the past five years.
  12. Hello to all! I was tapered, over a period of two months w/doctor's help, off of venlafaxine xr, buspirone, trazadone, and abilify. I had taken venlafaxine xr and abilify for 7 years and the other two for 14 years. Prior to the venlafaxine and abilify, I was on lexapro for 7 years. Considering the multiple meds and number of years of having taken them, I believe that my doctor tapered me down much too quickly. What is a real kicker is that when I contacted her to tell her I was having terrible symptoms, she diagnosed me over the phone with allergies and told me to go see my GP for further help. I did that, and he said they were all withdrawal symptoms. He assured me that time will heal me. He advised me to drink a lot of water, get exercise, and a lot of sleep. It's been over 5 months now, and I'm still symptomatic although they have reduced in minute degrees of intensity. I go from always being sick to feeling sicker and then back to being sick. My symptoms include burning, stinging, tingling skin on my arms; hot flashes (did those years ago with menopause); insomnia; lack of energy and motivation; icy-cold feeling hands, lower legs, and feet; brain-freeze feeling in the right backside of my head; and sensations of being stabbed throughout my body. The skin sensations are constant. The only thing I take now is fish oil--nothing else. When I first went off the drugs I also had terrible, intense, insatiable itching. The more I scratched, the more I itched. That has subsided, thank goodness. Has anyone experienced any similar symptoms? If so, did they eventually disappear? Did you ever experience a window? So far, I don't think I've had one. I would appreciate any help.
  13. It has been 8.5 weeks since I ct'd off 30 mgs of generic lexapro and 2mg of Abilify. I was depressed because my father who lived with us had died and marriage was getting rocky from the stress. I had been taking the generic lexapro for 2 years. This doctor added Abilify in Jan '16. I trusted her. I was depressed over life issues. I have no previous mental health diagnosis other than some anxiety which I had taken Xanax over the past 5 years. Most .5 three times per day. varied in usage - often less. I quickly became dysfunctional and family doctor prescribed .5 Ativan twice per day or I would have died. I have only become a bit more functional. but barely. I don't know what to do. I am very scared.
  14. Spideygsm

    Spideygsm off zyprexa

    Does anybody have Tips or something that actually worked for treating insomnia caused by antipsychotic withdrawals? The are some people like myself who had to do a pretty rapid taper because of dangerous side effects caused by years of use and a very high dose of Zyprexa. There are also some people holding back from getting off antipsychotic drugs due to the insomnia alone. I had moderate insomnia before I took Zyprexa. All of the antipsychotic drugs I've taken were for their approved use and NOT for insomnia. For myself nothing worked for the intense insomnia caused by the Zyprexa withdrawal. I tried Valium and Ambien and neither did anything. Hard exercise helped with the anxiety, depression ... but not for the insomnia. Only after I started to feel better and most of the other side effects were generally gone did anything help with the intense insomnia. I think it was at this point in my withdrawal that my brain starting to function as it did before I started taking the Zyprexa. At this point I tried Trazodone which did very little. I tried CBD oil and since I started the CBD oil, I've been sleeping well (ave 6 hours a night which is great for me). Please note, I had underlying insomnia and anxiety before Zyprexa. After the withdrawal symptoms from the antipsychotic pretty much went away, I started to feel exactly the same way I did before I started taking Zyprexa in that the underlying insomnia and anxiety that are caused by my Bipolar 1 and Anxiety Disorder returned. Zyprexa did not cause these underlying symptoms. Stopping the Zyprexa did not make me feel completely healed and normal (whatever that is). Stopping the Zyprexa got me out of the horrible brain fog and drugged feeling I had while taking Zyprexa. I do feel like I can think much clearer and have emotions again. Antisychotics took all that away. For me, I couldn't find that magic bullet to get rid of the insomnia caused by the antipsychotic withdrawal. I think the insomnia during withdrawal is completely different than the insomnia I experienced before by the use of the antipsychotic. I don't think there's anything that can be done to treat the insomnia caused by the antipsychotic withdrawal. The antipsychotic drugs are so powerful that the withdrawals can't be treated. I think the withdrawals can be controlled by a very low dose reduction and very slow taper as recommended by SA. For some people a 5% or 10% drop might be too much. If it is, try less. Everybody is different. I think your body will tell you how much of a dose reduction to make. You may be able to tolerate 10% or even 25% or as low as 1% or 2%. Nobody can tell you for sure. Pick a number and try. I wish I had that option. If anybody knows anything that helps the insomnia during the antipsychotic withdrawals, please share. For me, adding bandaid drugs didn't work. Even share your thoughts about timelines you experienced when your symptoms started to diminish. All of this would have helped me.
  15. I'm sure I'm going to leave something out, but here is my brief history: 1989 saw psychiatrist - took Prozac 1991 - 1995 was on various depression medications, none really helpful 1996 heard about wheat allergy from friend - began eating all natural, using supplements 2003 went to natural clinic - took megadoses of vitamins - set me back, never recovered ability to work full time 2013 read about MTHFR mutation - yup, I've got it. At least it gave me some hope. 2015 moved home, can no longer cut it in the real world. Saw Judy Tsafrir - put me on regimen espoused by William Walsh. Worked! To some degree at least, no SAD. Still no energy. 2016 Seeing naturopath to see what I can do about MTFHR, etc. Things seem to work some days, not others. Strange. I'm currently trying to withdraw from Abilify, under supervision. Thing is I have no medical symptoms, am super-healthy. Nothing touches the depression/fatigue though. Also, some days I'll miss taking Abilify and feel really great the next day. Is this common? Feel like the meds gave me just barely enough functioning to survive, and only that. Am supposed to start Wellbutrin (?) in 4 weeks, and stop Abilify. Have looked over this site for a long time now, I know I'm decreasing too fast but would love input/would welcome making suggestions.
  16. Hi. I'm trying to taper off Abilify and I'm flying solo because my GP has no clue about how to do it. She did say I should taper but had no guidelines. So last October I stopped taking it cold turkey because I am foolish and forgot what she said. One week later, I was a complete mess. So I went back on, and started to taper. I decided to decrease by .5 mg (started at 5 mg) every 2 1/2 weeks, the timeline was mostly just because it's easy to remember. I didn't have much of a reaction to the tapering, so I was pleased. However, I finally got down to .5 mg at the beginning of February (so hard to cut those pills ugh) and then stopped about a week ago. I'm starting to have withdrawal symptoms again -- the anxiety especially; it doesn't seem as bad as when I stopped at 5 mg in October but . . . it's just a week now and last time it got worse . . . I'm sort of lost as to what to do now. Was it too fast? Should I go back on .5 mg and stay there for a month or so and then try to stop completely? Or should I just try to wait out the symptoms? Any advice would be welcome! I have had trouble going off antidepressants in the past . . . Zoloft was a problem, as was Wellbutrin (although not the first two times I went off). I can stop taking Prozac on a whim with no problems, though? *shrug* (I'm also taking Prozac and Wellbutrin, no changes to those in some time. Oh, and dextroamphetamine but not depression related.)
  17. I was put on abilify 2 years ago. I had suffered several losses within a six month period. I started having anxiety attacks. The drug did work for me initially. I did not realize it was going to be a life contract. I want my life back and have tried to get off this terrible drug. Has anyone been successful in weaning off?
  18. Jennifer78

    Jennifer78

    Hello...I'm new to this website and I'm still not sure how this works. I'm looking for some hope I guess that's what you'd call it. I have been on meds for 15 years. Only an SSRI until probably 3 years ago. I was on Celexa 40mg, Abilify 10mg and Wellbutrin XL. I was so over medicated I felt numb and I couldn't function. I didn't know what was wrong with me & then I thought maybe it's to much medicine. I lost my health insurance on 12-01-16 so I couldn't afford all these meds so I stopped taking the Celexa & Abilify on that day. I'm still on Wellbutrin. The reason I stayed on it was I heard it would cause seizures if I cold turkey off it. I did not know I shouldn't of done that with the other 2. It will be 5 months on May 1st that I stopped other 2 meds. The only reason I went on medicine was because I lost my grandmother and I was stressed. My friend suggested I see a Dr so I did. Stupid mistake! I didn't even know Abilify was an antipsychotic until I googled it looking for answers about what was going on with me after stopping meds. I came across discontinue syndrome and then this website. Most psychical symptoms are gone and insomnia has gotten a tiny bit better but the anxiety and I guess it's depression is awful!! I don't have insurance so I can't afford to go back on the meds & go back to not functioning. I'm just wondering if I'm going to make it through this? I'm really worried. God Bless!
  19. Hello, I've been off Abilify for over 3 months now and came across an ad talking about Abilify and compulsive gambling lawsuits. I have no experience with lawsuits or lawyers and have reached out to a few law firms that I found online that are handling Abilify claims. Unfortunately, so far it seems that they can't handle a claim if you were taking the generic form of Abilify (aripripazole) or if you didn't loose a significant amount of money from gambling (over $50,000) or if you can't prove the losses. My issue is that looking back, I did have very serious compulsive behaviors including gambling, binge eating and shopping, not to mention weight gain and diabetes. So I am reaching out to anyone with experience in filing claims what I should do next or where I could go for help? I'm very interested in helping others realize the dangers of this medication, including severe withdrawal symptoms that I am still dealing with. TIA!
  20. Hello everybody: I'm in a struggle for my life with regards to taking Abilify. The clinic I attend doesn't really seem to know how to taper me off the substance. I myself don't know the specifics but I get the guideline that I should decrease by 10% per each taper event. Unfortunately, Abilify only comes in 10, 5 and 2 mg tablets. I'm currently at 10 mgs, and so how do I decline by 10% each time. I could go to 8 mgs my first try at it. That would be four 2 mg tablets. Would my or any insurance be cool with me getting a 120 supply of 2 mg tablets which would amount to a month at being at 8 mg dose of Abilify, and then in a month later ask them for 30 pill supply of 2 mg tablets with a 30 day supply of 5 mg tablets to reach a 7 mg dose? Then, that is only for two months... I'm confused how I can decline incrementally. The nurse practitioner said she wanted to go from 10 - to 7.5 - then 5 mgs all in four week's time. That sounds again like a very dangerous decline, which will put me in the hospital again. I'm already noticing sleep difficulties in falling asleep, followed by wakening within the hour, followed by falling back to sleep and wakening again. The whole cycle repeating itself 2 times at sleep onset and then around 4 or 5 in the morning, I have early wakenings. Although not so troubling, I have some muscle twitching in my hands between my index fingers and thumbs...and there are other areas where there is involuntary muscle twitching for shorter times. I need people's and the administrator's input on how specifically I can go about a taper from 10 mgs down to 5 mgs for the time being. I've only been at 10 mgs for the past two weeks, and I think if I go down another level tomorrow, that could bring about major sleep disordering. Okay, enough for now. Thanks for your valued input.
  21. hello, so about 5 years ago i was taking bath salts(stupid, i know), a lot of bath salts, and i developed a symptom like bulging eyes which destroyed my life this symptom lasted for one month but already i developed an obsession with how my eyes looked to other people which is still present in my life so i got depressed and isolated still obsessing over my eyes so what to do next? with my mother persisting in going to get help i ended in a psychiatric hospital, after 5 minutes of describing the symptoms and telling the cause (bath salts) to the psy I've got my identity and the sentence, I've got BDD, body dysmorphic disorder and the sentence was 2 zoloft in the morning 1 solian(antipsychotic) in the evening we all know whats coming next, after months on this treatment I've got worse, another diagnose, bi-polar - 2 zoloft + 3 norset + 1 abylyfy + 1 solian and an extra 4 serestra and that went for 5 years which comes with psychotic episodes, attempted suicides, forced psy hospitals stays, violent behavior, unable to form thoughts and without emotions, drug use, drinking and in the process i lost my soul and after only two years I've started hearing voices, pretty scary, but i was afraid talking with my psy because of another diagnose which all know that they say is for life, schizophrenia. And after all the suffering caused by this treatment they wanted to give me more powerful dosages I'm not going in to the details, i don't want to remember, it's hard not trusting your doctor, thinking is the devil, which he is imo. It's pretty hard for me to get off this drugs because I'm being forced in to the treatment and watched every day, there are nurses which came every day to give me the meds because of my attempted suicides, so they give me a glass of water and watch me if i swallow the meds , pretty scary, i know. The doctor it's convinced that i need the treatment all my life because of my behavior. So how i came off without anyone knowing? One night (of many) without sleep i went on YouTube watching movies reviews and by divine luck I've come across a video about big pharma an psychiatric drugs which changed everything and going deep into the subject i discovered the truth, which at the time seemed fantastic and scary. I mean you think all the time that your doctor wants to help you and has years of studying this thing in school and there is the ''science'' to back all this, come on! it's a doctor, a psychiatrist, he must know things, no? and suddenly you see the other face of the coin and here comes the rage. It's hard for me to tamper because i don't have the drugs, they give me the drugs, so my only option it's going cold turkey, made them think that i swallowed the drugs, hiding them in my hand. So now I'm two weeks in cold turkey, trying to stay ''normal'' for family and doctors not to give away that you are in withdrawal, it's pretty hard. I'm going trough hell here and it's been only two weeks. I've been searching for information all this time, when I'm not in severe depression. I've found 5-htp which I'm on for 3 days now and it's good, placebo? i will take everything which will help me I've found meditation which make sense for me, but to try to concentrate on your breath for 5 minutes right now seems pretty hard, reading books on the subject helps me, I'm gonna do everything that i can to stay off the meds even if i need to die in the process.
  22. Hello, I am Sean. Long time depression and anxiety sufferer. 36y/o, male. Have been on various meds since being a young teenager. Have taken most types of psychiatric drugs at some point. Recently been dealing with hard depression and possibly BP2 diagnosis (if that matters), and am currently on lamictal, Wellbutrin, Gabapentin and Abilify. Sadly I stopped Abilify and Gabapentin improperly a month ago, and now am worried I am going through serious withdrawals and don’t know what to do. I have been on the Lamictal for about 6 years, and 1mg of clonazepam for sleep (or bad anxiety) for maybe 7-8 years. Recently, I had been taking 5mg Abilify since last summer (mid 2017) as an adjunct to treat depression and some psychosis, and also was given gabapentin for anxiety at the same time. I took the Abilify 5mg for a while, then would stop and start as I felt it wasn't doing anything to help, but eventually took is steadily throughout the last few months of the year. I would also take the gabapentin usually in the afternoons for anxiety attack flare ups. The gabapentin was prescribed as taking 1-3 300mg capsules 3x a day (for a potential max of 2700). I usually would only take 900mg a day, and that seemed to help me feel better. For the new year, I wanted to stop the Abilify and Gabapentin, and I had been tapering down the Abilify from 5mg a day to 2.5mg, but then forgot to take it with me on my christmas trip (December 22-28) and had to just stop. I also tried to minimize the gabapentin use and don't quite remember how much I took it over the christmas break, probably semi regularly. I came home from christmas on the 28th (2017) and wanted to be off so many meds as they weren't helping the original intent. I was still on the Wellbutrin, but also had these thoughts of stopping/tapering that down too. Well as of today it's been about 4 weeks without the Abilify, and maybe close to 4 weeks without gabapentin, and I am feeling very strange. Upon returning home, I have developed early morning awakening at around 4am every day (even when taking the 1mg clonazepam for sleep) and have extreme fatigue, obviously, through the day. But as I read more about the Abilify (and then gabapentin) withdrawals, I realized that I might have screwed up bigtime in thinking I could stop them. The gabapentin I was never told had to be tapered down, I thought it was an "As needed" for anxiety med, and I had been taking only 1/3rd of what was prescribed (900mg daily instead of 2700mg). So I've been nearly a month off that. At the same time, in my goal to reduce my drug cocktail, I also thought I could take the Abilify down to 2.5mg for a few weeks, then just cut that down to zero. That's been about a month now as well. But, now that I've read all through these forums, I realize that I may have screwed up real bad. It has definitely been a rough month of emotions and symptoms, but I attributed it mostly to some emotional strain over the holidays and a general continuation of my original depression/anxiety. But now I am wondering if I have thrown myself into a total loop by cutting off those two drugs so improperly, without doctor's supervision or advice. I thought I would be ok. So right now, my quandary is: it's been a month, do I restart the drugs and try tapering over again, or do I just realize that I made a big mistake and push through it now instead of starting back over? This is what I'm afraid of, I feel stuck! And I am not sure how much my pdoc knows or is informed on these withdrawal syndromes. Plus it's really hard to get an appointment with her. I just had one this week and I didn't explain myself well (and hadn't read these forums) so I wasn't aware of the 10% rule and the other possible effects of stopping. I could use some advice or insights. I realize if I'd read these forums before, I wouldn't have stopped like this. But now that I'm a month in, I don't know if it's better to try and start back up, and then taper down, or just figure I need to live through it. I am happy to answer more questions here or in other threads. Please help, thank you!
  23. Hey this is my first post on this site and wanted to post about ability. I feel it has made my illness, if you want to call it that, much worse than I was in the past. I am impulsive, compulsive, and more serial than I was. I feel it has torn my 20s away. I feel it is setting me back. I was alarmed when I saw lawsuits about it on commercials. Anyway I am on 10mg of abilify since April 2011. Finally had a psychiatrist convinced I need to reduce it even though she was hesitant. She increased it back to 10mg when I told her I smoked bud, which I want to stop as well. (Too much going illicit or not). I want to talk to her about going back to 7mg even though I have enough of the 5mg and 2mg to wean off of. Also, I am on 75 MG of welbutrin which I am told is the lowest dose. Also clonezepam.5 MG, 2x a day as needed. I take about 1 MG a day. I would like to first wean off the abilify. Then welbutrin. Then clonezepam. How do I go about this with the 10% reduction in meds ( I'm not great at math) and at what point do I stop smoking, or slowly wean off as well. Thanks in advance, all answers are appreciated.
  24. Hey everyone! My name is Cat and I've been taking antidepressants since I was 13. I'm now 19 and I've been on more medications than I can remember, as I say in my signature. I'm currently coming off of abilify , but taking viibryd and lamictal to keep my depression /anxiety combo at bay. I'm also taking ritalin for ADHD. I really hated the side effects of the abilify - at a higher dose (15 mg) it was making me extremely fatigued, and it's made me hungry all the time at pretty much all doses, leading to significant weight gain (Over the course of taking, if I'm remembering correctly, I've gone from 150ish to about 190). I kind of quit it cold turkey do to some pharamacy mix ups and for the first few days I didn't feel any adverse effects so I asked my psychiatrist how she'd feel about me coming off of it. Her response was that she agreed that I could continue off my dose of 7.5 mg and then we'd see how I felt when it was totally out of my system. Now, however, I'm feeling like my brain is fried and foggy. Concentrating and motivating myself are becoming hard, I'm worried that I came off the drug too quickly and, as I'm in college, I'm really worried about the effects this might have on my ability to learn, do homework, and get good grades. I don't really know how to approach this site, so I guess I'll just go exploring and see what I can find! On another note, I definitely want to look at my medication history now. It's probably huge and I think it'd be interesting to share it with you all.
  25. My journey started 23 years ago when I had postpartum depression and my doctor told me I was bipolar. In and out of hospitals for the next 23 years and a barrage of medications. At one point I was on seven antidepressant two mood stabilizers and two anti-anxiety pills. I was still trying to kill myself or find a way to do it everyday. I was locked in my own mind of a living hell. About four years ago I decided to wean down from the medications to just Abilify and Effexor. The Effexor stay because everytime I try to wean off of it I never could because of the side effects. August of 2015 I was faced for the first time with not having insurance. I was unable to afford my effexor. I was forced into a withdrawal. For the next 4 months as most of you know I was in a living hell of vertigo throwing up aches and pains like I've never had before. As the vertigo and other symptoms subsided my pain became more and more excruciating to the point of intolerable. Now after a year-and-a-half at times I am unable to lift my arms. I have constant pain in all of my joints and muscles. Not just flu like pain but excruciating debilitating pain for I cannot function. I cry all the time because it is so intense. I have been to Mayo Clinic and all my test came back inconclusive. I'm actually extremely healthy. I've always let a healthy lifestyle and used to be a bodybuilder. Now I have pain everywhere everyday. So I asked the doctor if this could be a result of being on Effexor. He said absolutely. As I left that answer resonate I knew I had a friend who was a psychiatric nurse. I asked her the same question. Could I be experiencing this horrendous pain because of taking Effexor for so long. Her answer was the same. Yes. So for the last year of being off Effexor I have never been happier. I smile everyday. I had 23 years of my life taken away from me because of a misdiagnosis bipolar 1 and actuality it was just hormones. Now I'm free from trying to kill myself every day. Trying to survive everyday. Weaning off of the Effexor. And now I am faced with living the rest of my life with no quality of life period excruciating pain where I have to go to the emergency room constantly to get relief. Dilaudid Percocet Oxycontin nothing works for the pain. And I know it was due to the Effexor. I don't know what to do now. I don't know how to go on. But I will tell you I have never had one day and the last year of depression or suicidal ideation like I did when I was on Effexor. I'm so happy finally.
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