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  1. Hi my name is Alberto and I’ve tried a ton of ssris and antipsychotics over the past 7 years. Most recently I had a really bad experience with rexulti that gave me akithsia (which went away once I discontinued thank gawd) and my current ongoing bout with Effexor. I’m in a bit of weird situation in that I wasn’t in it for long and am looking for help as I’m at wit’s end and am seriously inching closer to suicide due to my symptoms. I started Effexor June 24 75mg. I immediately noticed really bad headaches and nausea but stayed he course as “that’s the side effects for 2 week”. By 5 days in the headaches had gotten really bad but I also had started getting burning sensations across my whole body and head. After dealing with this for a few days we reduced my dose to 37.5. The symptoms continued and got worse so we discontinued Effexor Monday 7/4. The first two days were a continued hell of body burning headaches nausea anxiety shortness of breath etc. The intense while body burning thankfully went away 2-4 days later tho lighter leg burning remained. The anxiety and shortness of breath have slowly gone away too but the headache and nausea feel worse/like they’ve stagnated. I’m two weeks post stopping this hell drug (for me) and almost a month since starting it but my nausea and headaches are just insane and making it impossible for me to live a good life and function well. It’s really impacting my work but most importantly my wife and kid. Has anyone every heard of or experienced anything like this? Did it go away, when? Did anything help you manage the symptoms til it did ? I have this fear that this is going to be a chronic thing I have to live with forever and tbh I won’t live long if that’s the case. The klonopin, zofran, and advil I take to manage do a meh job and I’m at wit’s end. Guess I’m looking for some success stories related to this and advice to help me get on the right track and ultimately save my life. Thank you and sorry for the really dramatic post, I’m just really hurting.
  2. Hello guys , please spare a few minutes to read it and help me with this. I am from India 25 male In April of 2019 ,during my 3rd semester break, I had a breathing issue (one side nose block )and a sleep (cycle )problem,so I went to ent doc- dx with right sinusitis (not severe ) . For the sleeping cycle issue ,he told to see psychiatry (his wife ) and she prescribed DEP®@n L combination of ( Le×@pro 5 mg + clo≠zepam 0.25 mg ) for 14 days and told to stop After stopping , I had symptoms like - heart pounding ,anxiety , concentration issues, irritability . So I expected it to go away, but it didn't .So I went to another psychiatrist after 6 month (oct 2019),and he prescribed p®@xil (p®@xidep cr 12.5 mg ) ( oct 2019 to Jan 2020) i took for 3 months. while taking this durg my irritability ,anger increased .After stopping the drug I had symptoms of acid reflux ,pounding heart , muscle twitching,anxiety ,anger issue , irritability , indigestion i couldn't eat like before my food consumption decreased,sweating at night , waking at midnight 2am ,mild erectile dysfunction , orgasm decreased slightly ,mild heat intolerance . These severe affects lasted 6 months (aug 2020) and gradually decreased ,but the following symptoms did not -anxiety ,acid reflux, sexual side affects Somehow, I graduated in 2020 Feb 2021 due to exam pressure my sleep cycle changed - anxiety increased so I decided to take it again p®@xil (p®@xidep cr 12.5 mg ) this was the biggest mistake that i have ever made. . While taking the drug I felt dizzy all the time . on 12 th day I got severe gi distress and complete sexual dysfunction that shocked me so I stopped (Feb 2021) that drug cold trukey after that I had total sexual dysfunction ,can't feel emotion,severe acid reflux, heat intolerance ,throat pain ,blurry vision ,fatigue ,muscle pain , shivering, frequent urination ,fear increased , social anxiety ,panic attack,bloating , inability to burp , indigestion,muscle twitching, heart palpitation , headache,bounding pluse , wake up at midnight , can't able to sleep at right time always varies , exercise ability decreased , anger to the peak , irritability, confusion,can't concentrate ,eyelids felt always tired ,anxiety increased . this lasted about 7 to 9 months severely (June 2021) and gradually decreased .now this is my 17 th month slightly improved i can exercise more than 20 mins but still have most of this symptoms especially total sexual dysfunction ,anxiety ,indigestion ,muscle pain , concentration problem . In my first 2 attempts I couldn't study properly and in my 3rd attempt I did some but not enough, so I failed in all my attempts. I am going to write another one this year .my problem is that i can't study for long (8hrs-10hrs) and have concentration problem .Almost wasted a year and a half of my life .i have read "withdrawal and tapering 101".i am planning to reinstate very low dose ssri ? Anyone here been through something similar and recovered ? What lab tests do I have to take ? Can anyone help me with this ? I am obsessed with my sexual dysfunction always thinking about it makes me sick . My friends passed the exam a year ago ,but I am still struggling . I shouldn't have taken antidepressants 😔 What should I do ? Plz give me some suggestions
  3. Hi I am presently very foggy and unsure how to go about composing this but I’ll do my best. About eight days ago (May 20) I took one dose of a 20mg adderall XR prescription I had recently been given for ADHD. If I’m remembering correctly my focus was improved and I was able to get a lot of things done without incurring much fatigue the way I normally do, but it immediately caused some pretty intense side effects, including elevated anxiety (nearly to the point of panic frankly), sexual dysfunction, appetite suppressing, GI problems, numbness/tingling in my extremities, and insomnia. I discontinued after the first dose and some of the symptoms subsided, but many didn’t and fairly quickly some new ones emerged. Presently I’m experiencing severe brain fog, anhedonia, sexual dysfunction (v low libido and genital insensitivity), difficulty w speech, heavy fatigue, dissociation (maybe depersonalization/derealization? It’s hard to tell), tremors in my hands and head and some involuntary movements, numbness/tingling in extremities (different from when on the med, less of a squeezing more like “drained”, I think I read that adderall affects blood flow), difficulty eating (also a different quality to the appetite suppressing effects of the meds), occasional insomnia, altered perception of time (everything feels much slower) and very intense depression and anxiety. I am very distressed ab these. I’m a trans woman w a history of sexual abuse and medication-induced sexual dysfunction (both very distressing! tho the dysfunction was never quite persistent iirc) as well as long term dissociation due to dysphoria who has only within the last year (since I fully came out and started hormone replacement therapy) that I’ve begun to heal and enjoy being present in my body and to experience a sexuality that doesn’t feel poisonous to me, and it has been more or less heartbreaking to feel as though the like. Fruits of my progress have been taken away from me. Additionally, I’m a survivor of long-term withdrawal from other meds, most notably lamictal, and it’s very triggering to be experiencing symptoms that so closely parallel my experiences with that. I’m hoping very much I’ll experience some relief soon because I don’t feel remotely like myself. I haven’t been able to engage with any of my interests in any sustained way since the dose. I’m very afraid I’ve given myself a case of PSSD in a roundabout way, though I’m trying to stop myself from jumping to conclusions. I am going to pursue specialized treatment for PTSD w/o meds in the meantime. I would appreciate any comfort, reassurance, advice, etc — (until I figure out how to pin a signature I’ll just put one here manually) extensive history of prior psych meds usage for adhd, depression, anxiety lamictal march-august 2018 (abrupt taper over latter four months, don’t remember dose) abilify, three days september 2018 concerta September-October 2018 reinstated lamictal at microdose, then tapered off probably too abruptly May 2019-July 2019 Estradiol, Spironolactone, Progesterone April 2021-present 💗 Adderall XR 20mg May 20, 2022
  4. Hello everyone I developed an anxiety disorder during the pandemic. I didn’t know I was having anxiety at first because I never had it before so it took forever for me to actually start treating it. My anxiety was so bad it caused silent acid reflex. Anyways with time it got better naturally & then I started meditating everyday for about 3 weeks & it really got better the acid reflex was improving too. I got impatient because I wanted my life back already so I thought that taking 10mg celxa pill for a few months to finally get rid of the acid reflex would be ok. I took the pill at night time & felt calm when I woke up, I also noticed my reflex was like 95% gone which just proves it was from anxiety. Anyways later on that day I all of a sudden out of no where I got a headache, rapid heartbeat & shaky hands then I got a “s” thought ( I don’t wanna say the word) which I never had before it was like a voice in my head. I immediately threw all the medication down the drain & didn’t take another one. So I only took ONE pill. After a about a week my acid reflex came back. Since then I’ve had intrusive thoughts, ocd thoughts, brain zaps, memories of bad things that have happened, thoughts focused around violence, fear for no reason, mood swings sad for no reason, crying for no reason, extreme anxiety, frequent urinating, increase of my acid reflex, unable to sit still for long etc. This is obviously all from the pill. this is ridiculous & super scary that just one pill can cause all of this. I don’t know what to do besides wait. I do yoga every morning & breathing exercises & sometimes ride my bike. I had to quit my job. I’m only in my 20’s. Any advice or similar story is welcomed. I took the pill on April 25th so it’s been about a month now
  5. Hello, I am a 27M. In January 2022 I was prescribed generic Bupropion 150mg XL off label for ADHD. Before this I had no major mental health issues other than mild anxiety/depression and ADHD and had never taken any psychiatric medication, or any real prescription drug beyond cold medicine and antibiotics. I did have Covid 2 months prior 11/2021. I wonder if Covid could have prompted this adverse reaction somehow. While taking the medication I experienced fatigue and slight dizziness at first. On the 6th day I experienced complete euphoria that felt like some kind of psychedelic trip. Colors were brighter, things were funnier, It felt like my brain was flooded with dopamine. On the seventh day, I continued to feel euphoric but also fell emotionally flat. I also noticed that my sexdrive was non-existent and I experienced erectile dysfunction for the first time in my life. I immediately stopped the medication. I was not made aware of problematic cold turkeying and didn't think it would be necessary after just a week of medication. Since then, I have experienced all sorts of horrific symptoms that have destroyed my life including: Severe brain fog Complete emotional Anhedonia (Music, food, movies bring zero enjoyment) Loss of inner voice Loss of inner visualization Sexual Anhedonia (feel little to zero sexual pleasure). No sex drive, or feelings of attraction POTS feeling very hot or cold. inner restlessness (mild akathisia?) random "SI" thoughts headaches that last for hours visual snow DP/DR colors appear dulled and I get tunnel vision when over stimulated. waking up many times in the night. These symptoms have all remained for the last 5 months. With some minor improvements in brain fog and some days being better than others. It feels as if my dopamine system is completely broken. I have somehow managed to continue working through all of this but my performance has seriously plummeted. Everyday is a battle. I fear for my future, my career, and my relationship. I fear that I have irreversible brain damage at the age of 27 from simply trying to resolve my ADHD. Id appreciate any advice or words of encouragement. This has by far been the worst experience of my life.
  6. Hello. I'm 21 y.o. male. My story with ADs. I was taking Cytalopram ~8 months in 2019, then I stopped it myself as I was not seeing any effect. 07.07.2022 I took first 30mg of prescribed duloxetine before sleep. (Also I was prescribed it with Lamotrigine, Atarax. I strated them a week or two before.) After 2.5h of sleep I woke up with strange feeling. It was difficult to focus, it was getting dark in my eyes. Seems like my pressure got low so I even called to ambulance, but they said ti is just adverse effect and it's ok. Then it got better, but it was a strange feeling in my head all next day. I drank a lot of water (~6 liters) to decrease this drug effect. I was trying to sleep, but wake up every 1-2 hous. I read about a possible PSSD, even after a few days of taking it. Fortunately, yesturday I tried and it seems like it was ok with orgasm. Also I slept today and seems I'm feeling better, but have slight kind of lightheadedness. Of course, I wouldn't take this drugs anymore. Maybe you can reassure me that nothing terrible will happen to my brain from one pill? I would like advice about some lifestyle changes/supplement/diet to minimize effects of this drugs and reduce anxiety. Btw last few months I used to go to the gym and eat healthy diet. When is the best time for me to exercise? Thank you in advance. I appreciate this community.
  7. Hello everyone I apologize if I don’t write so good I hope I made sense in my writing , English is not my main language … I was at the emergency room last month i. The middle of May due to panic attacks and they refer me to a mental clinic and when I was there last month I had no choice that to take the meds that they were giving me first lexapro 10mg with klonopin I don’t know the mg that was on my first day. on my second day the give me lexapro 10mg and gabapentin 3 times a day I don’t know the mg but it was 1 big pill of gabapentin and the nurse keep giving me the same doses of lexapro and gabapentin for the following week then After that 1 week I got discharged and when I was at home I only took lexapro for 2 more days the I stop cold turkey because of the awful side effects like racing heart ,brain fog ,increased anxiety and insomnia I didn’t sleep at all those 2 days ,,and then like 5 days after I quit I started experiencing weird feelings in my throat(feels very very very dry all the way to my stomach) it’s really hard for me to sleep now I keep waking up with this weird sensation and I have it all day but is more uncomfortable at night also my nose feels kinda dry as well I been having weird stools very soft but the main issue is the feeling of dryness that I feel in the throat I feel like is hard for me to breathe even though I went to ER again recently to see what is going on and they told me my oxigen levels are perfect they check my lungs and they are fine idk what to do i don’t know if I will feel better I regret so much that I took those meds because I feel worse now after I took it than before … oh and also I have slightly head pressure specially in the nights … I had ringing in my right ear the very first days that I stopped taking those meds and it seems like the ringing of ear has been fading .. I forgot to mention that the 3 days after of me stopped the med I was waking up with chills and sweating but I was feeling a little bit cold …I been searching if someone have similar issue as me of this weird dry feeling in the digestive track and throat after stopping lexapro but I haven’t found anything and I’m scared because I only took those meds for just a short period of time I don’t know if a person can experience withdrawal when they only took a few doses it’s been 3 weeks now that I’m feeling this way I stopped taking lexapro on May 26 and this weird symptom started like 5 days after = ( I feel so hopeless
  8. naturegirl

    naturegirl: please help

    Hey everyone. Things are really brutal for me right now. I started having insomnia and anxiety around my cycle each month. It was quite bad. In retrospect, I think it was the 5mg melatonin I had been taking every night for over a year that messed up my hormones and triggered all this. I would also take an additional 5 or 10mg if not sleeping, which after doing a lot of research I now know was really dumb. Anyhow, I should have known better, because I have tried psych meds in the past with disastrous results, but I was feeling badly enough that I sought help. Long story short....After 2 weeks of trying gabapentin, trazodone, doxepin, hydroxyzine and ambien and getting sicker and more mentally destroyed with each new drug, I agreed to start Prozac 5mg. I took it for 5 weeks, and every day was hell but I was trying to hang in there and let it work. After 5 weeks, I cut to 2.5mg for a week, then discontinued. Felt pretty good for 3 weeks, then the gates of hell opened. I feel a horrible chemical anxiety and a crushing feeling in my chest constantly now. I don't sleep much or well. My GI tract is really messed up. I only eat to stay alive. I have a constant vibrating/shaking feeling in my entire body. From 5mg, how is this possible???? My husband is out of town and I am caring for our two small children by myself. I'm also working 3.5 days per week at a high stress job. Please help me, I know the only way through this is one day at a time and no more prescriptions, but this feels impossible right now. I won't even take supplements, I really feel like the melatonin had a part in the initial problem. I really need support...
  9. Hello I have been on Anti Depressants since 2016. The only one that made any difference for a few months was Duloxetine 50mg. That stopped working for both depression and anxiety so I discontinued it back in 2019. I was ok for a couple of months but then started feeling anxious again, and the GP reintroduced it. Fast forward to 2021 and a bad dose of Long COVID, and I had to stop the Duloxetine as it was giving me heart disregulation. I then tried Escitalapram for a few weeks but was unable to tolerate it, so the GP prescribed me Mirtazapine. This was put up to 30mg in March 2022, then I developed severe anxiety and discontinued, having a cross taper to Duloxetine again. Whilst cross-tapering, I discovered that the combination of Duloxetine and Mirtazapine seemed to stop my anxiety and so the GP has prescribed this combo. I am only in week 1, but some days I feel fine, and then like today, all I want to do is crash out. I have no job at the moment and feel pretty hopeless. After reading the report in today's news regarding the lack of evidence for the Serotonin hypothesis, I feel like just binning the whole lot of antidepressants, and using diazepam to withdraw off the lot. However, every time I come off antidepressants, I feel like my symptoms rebound. I am starting to feel like a chemistry play set, and don't want to feel this way. I am 47, wife a family.
  10. Just thought I’d share my story and see what your opinions are. (Sorry a bit long) I was diagnosed with panic disorder and GAD back in February, After going to the ER thinking I was dying or was having a nervous break down. I then took some clonazepam .25 mg 1x for two days which really seemed to help me For a couple weeks, then again i experienced the same bad panic attack in March where i took the clonazepam again this time for 4 days 0.25 mg 1x per day. I then felt better for a couple of days. After that i started reading on benzos and decided i should stop taking it and that no matter what panic attack arrised i couldn’t take it again to not become dependent. Well around day 7 of not taking it anymore my body went into full panic mode, i was experiencing light sensitivity , depersonalization, constant nervous and screaming crying worrying i wasn’t going to get any better not knowing what was happening to me. I then said okay it’s time to get on something else that will help me with anxiety. Immediately my doctor prescribed me zoloft. Which i was freaking out about starting it and obsessively reading things online abt peoples experience with it. starting zoloft was hell in itself . I felt all symptoms you name it. It started with feeling of worried for a couple of days aand then feelings of being okay normal self for the next days and it would just be up and down up and down. I did start to notice that around my menstrual cycle the first month i would get deep feelings of sadness. Like a sadness i had not felt before. That would last until my period went away. the second month again, around my menstrual cycle is when i finally decided to cold turkey as per my doctor . I told her i had been experiencing weird thoughts on it, and that i would get moments of like racing thoughts where my mind wouldn’t shut up and I’d wake up with so much anxiety in the morning like in was going to go into another attack. So she suggested it might be some hormonal issues interfering with the med and told me to just stop taking it. I asked her if i could taper since i didn’t want to just stop. She said i wasn’t on it long enough to get any withdrawal .I went down to 25 mg two days and then just stopped. When i stoped i felt instantly better back to my normal self For about 2 days and then around 5th day of stopping is when i started having crying spells, , brain zaps, body shocks ,more wnxiety, feeling like i was losing my mind again very worried about my self and getting better. It was just hell. Fast forward to a month from withdrawal of zoloft , im still having the really bad down depression 10 days before my period started. Idk what to do at this point. I just feel really angry because i shouldn’t have been put in Ssri if i had no symptoms of depression prior to the zoloft. my doctor told me to go on a mood stabilizer which i thought was for bi polar but I’ve never been diagnosed bi polar or had any episodes of mania/ hypomania. I don’t want to go back to the same doctor that prescribed me the zoloft because. I know they will want to prescribe me something else. It’s getting really hard , i just keep trying to find a solution. Seeing that my vitamin d levels are low trying to bring that up. Just looking to see if there’s something else going on. But i cannot think about going another menstrual cycle feeling like this, it’s unbearable i cannot function it makes me feel like a bad wife and mother.once my period stop i noticed my mood starts to slowly lift back to being my normal self. Can someone share their story or a similar experience to an Ssri
  11. mod note: Lzieb's introduction topic here (additional topic by Lzieb: Lzieb's son: Withdrawing my 11 year old son from fluoxetine ) I just want to share my story to everyone who has had an ADR and is looking for hope. 2 years and 3 months ago I had an immediate ADR to Zoloft. Like many of you reading this, I was terrified I wouldn't heal and swore I must be the worst. My injury and suffering was profound...something I didn't know was possible to experience. I was literally in the worst place I've ever been but by God's grace I've recovered. I started climbing out of that pit at 6 months and then by 10 months, I really had turned a corner. By 12 months life had begun to return to normal and since then has only improved. At this point I'd say while I'm not 100% who I was prior to injury (minor memory and occasional dr/dp), I am doing well, life has moved forward and this is behind me. If I didn't heal the last minor things, I'd be ok. I know if you are reading this, it seems really dark and hopeless and maybe you're afraid...but I promise you it's not hopeless. Time is our friend...slowly our brain returns to homeostasis. We get there so just hold on and don't give up. I want you to know I've personally been in contact with many ADR survivors who have recovered. I know of doctors who have treated hundreds over the course of their practice...we get there and you will too. So don't give up! Press on everyday and just get to the night. Every morning gets you closer to having this behind you. Some tips and truths that helped me: - Eat well. I ate food that was healthy and good for my brain. - Rest as best you can (insomnia is difficult but your body can rest some without moving even if you're not sleeping) - Avoid alcohol, recreational drugs, more psyche drugs, ..let you body heal itself. Be very careful with supplements too! Stick to the magnesium and fish oil. - Be careful on how often you are on forums...especially if you can't filter. Remember many people on forums only post while suffering - Adrs are similar but not exact to WDs. We really don't cycle through totally different symptoms. Often the symptoms we have, we keep and feel them to a greater and less degree during the healing process - Some people who speak about having an ADR, may also have a history of other psyche meds so be careful assuming you are similar even if they took the same medication as you for the same amount of time. Everyone here is different - Recovered adrs are out there...it's just we stop posting and don't update once life gets back to normal...also this is traumatic so not everyone returns to share their updates - Be mindful who you listen to...protect your subconscious - Everyone heals on their own timeline. - Your body will do whatever it needs to recover. - Distraction and being busy is your friend. Serving others gets your focus off yourself. Also, doing a gratitude journal really helped me. - Find safe people to help you and be gentle/kind to yourself. This experience is very hard. - It gets easier...You will get there! ****If I can heal, you can heal!!!**** Thank you to everyone on SA that helped me. Thank you to the moderators who answered all my questions. I am so thankful for everyone of you. You helped me tremendously. I thank Jesus for giving me another chance and healing me. He is able! Please feel free to contact me if you need encouragement. I would love to help if I can! A Survivor of ADR, Lzieb
  12. Hi. So, I had been having some health anxiety over 2021. It resulted in me getting a colonoscopy in November 2021. Leading up to it I had intense anxiety, a few panic attacks and perhaps even a nervous breakdown. The night before I woke at 3 am and had a panic attack. I really thought I was dying this time, so we called 911, and I luckily, not dying. During the procedure they did take a biopsy, and while waiting for the results (2weeks) I had very intense anxiety. It was benign. I'd had intense panic and anxiety for almost a whole month at this point. Around Dec 17, 2021 I contracted covid. It was pretty uneventful, but near the end of it I was waking around 5 am with adrenaline and diarrhea and I couldn't go back to sleep, this was creating anxiety in me that was getting harder and harder to control. So I went to a Dr on December 30 2021 who prescribed me Zoloft 50mg and Xanax 0.25mg. They were filled pretty fast and I took one of each as soon as I got home (around 1-2pm) I felt ok at first, but a few hours later all the side effects started. Irritable/uncomfortable, anxiety, nauseous, no appetite, chills, diarrhea, invasive thoughts that started pretty quick and intensely, and soon to find out - insomnia. I'd lay there with invasive thoughts and if I happened to drift off I'd be jerked awake and there was no sleeping for at least a week. I lived in a panic for around 2 weeks. I never took another dose of Zoloft. But I did take around 9 doses (some halved) of Xanax over the next 2-3 months. Sometimes to help sleep, but it was never worth it as I'd only get a 2-3 hours and then have intense anxiety the next day. It worked ok for panic during the day, but then I feel it intensified my anxiety for the next few days. I found some old Valium 5mg from a dental procedure, there were only 2 doses. They helped sleep some, but they left me feeling so sluggish, it didn't feel good. And it wasn't helping me sleep enough to want to try to get more, I was prescribed Restoril 15mg in April by a sleep Dr. I only took half doses 3 times. Again, it didn't help my sleep enough to ever make it worth it and just gave me bad rebound anxiety. Then I was prescribed hydroxyzine May 2021 (forgot about that when I wrote my signature, will add later). I've taken it around 5 times. It helped me sleep the first night, then not so much the next. Waited a week and tried again, it helped a little for sleep and calming, but not that much. It was mostly disappointing. Luckily it didn't seem to cause any rebound anxiety. But it doesn't help with much so I really don't take it. So, I did take my last Xanax around 1 month ago for a bad panic attack. And that was last time I took a benzo. My last hydroxyzine was around 1 week ago. My current symptoms are anxiety, depression, anhedonia, depersonalization/derealization (I'm never sure on the terms, it's the one where I feel like I'm in a dream, I can react to everyone normally and everything seems normal, but I just feel ... off, like I'm not connected to it all). Agoraphobia, I can push past it but it's hard and only if it's close to home or my husband and children are with me. Which really sucks because I used to love going out by myself or with my children, go on vacations etc... now I feel like I can't leave the house without forcing myself. This fear feeling is so horrible and there really is no reason, I just feel it. And intense insomnia, I can't fall asleep, can't nap, I get adrenaline rushes continuously as I'm trying to fall asleep, or less common are the hypnic jerks, and I wake early around 3-6am and can't fall back to sleep even if I've only slept for 1-2 hours. I like to think my sleep is getting better, as there some rare nights when I will get 5-7 hours. But those are followed the next night by not being able to fall asleep because of adrenaline surges. So, I'm probably only getting those nights from severe sleep deprivation, not that I'm actually getting better =( At one point I thought it was just anxiety keeping awake, but there have been plenty of nights I go to sleep with NO worries at all. I'm not over thinking or thinking of anything provoking and I still get the adrenaline surges at the point of falling asleep. It's seriously so maddening. It's going into 6 months since that day and my sleep is still not good. I thought it would last a few days, then weeks, then got my hopes for a few months. Now it's going into half a year. It started with panic and anxiety, but now depression is setting in and I just don't know what to do. I try to keep my hopes up, but it's so hard. I also have anhedonia and agoraphobia although I can push past it as long as it's close to home, but it takes a lot of effort. I do get some windows I stay home with my 3 small children and am not able to be the mother I want to be for them by feeling this way. Which again adds to the depression. So that's where I am. I hate that I took that zoloft and xanax. And for a long time now i was just blaming the zoloft. And now I've been wondering if the benzos have been negatively affecting me as well? I know I can't beat myself up over it. I try and accept my situation and believe that I will heal. But it's so hard and it all feels so dark sometimes.
  13. Hay, my name is Jernej and I come from Slovenia, so sorry for my English language in advance. I was a binge drinker and marijuana user from 2014 which lead to anxiety attacks next days after smoking and drinking, until I realized I had to quit for good... so I stopped everything and was left with quite of a ride with high anxiety and low stress response. Things started to improve, but I had huge stress year after, when my gf left me and with still low stress intolerance and without coping skills I decided I should try AD. I went to psychiatrist and he prescribed me Zoloft (march 2018) and was ordered to raise my dose to 100 mg in few weeks. It didn't really worked as I hoped, I could sleep better, but my morning anxiety was still there. In the meantime my gf came back, I raised my dose to even 200 mg at that time following doctors orders as he believed it has to work for me. He said I could just taper in few weeks if I wasn't happy with it, and that was it, I did exactly that. If I know better that time. Well, I had some PAWS at that time for like three months, mainly some jerking legs, brain zaps and again more pronounced anxiety, but things was promising after that time. I was quite ok for more than a year, I still had some mild anxiety and low stress tolerance, but was quite happy, I could even drink some alcohol again and didn't get a kick next day. Someday in March 2020 I had car accident, and right after that I was getting some chest burning, probably high anxiety at nights so I wasn't getting enough sleep, and me idiot thought I could try something whatever my personal doc would prescribe me... so I went there and she prescribed me Paxil, as I told her I have problems sleeping and low stress tolerance. I split that 20 mg pill on half and took it before sleep and woke two hours later with panic attack and some dizziness. Next day i repeat and same result, so I stopped everything and was never the same from that day. I thought everything will settle in few days, but boy I was wrong. My gp didn't believe me one pill could do that, she prescribed me Lorazepam, which I took split pill for two days just to get some sleep. I was having anxiety attacks daily, some depression, even lower stress response, I could barely work... I had few days I was somehow better from the beginning, but I think things got worse this year. In February this year, I developed fear, I had to push myself to go to work, I started CBT, fear did lessen a bit, but now 19 months out, I am struggling even more. I did had antibiotic treatment 9 months back for stomach, two different at the same time, but didn't have difficulties with it. Well, back to this week, I developed more debilitating symptoms like pain and needles, jerking legs and arms, twitching in muscles, burning and some pain inside my limbs, anxiety through the roof, trouble sleeping, depression kicking in, moderate fatigue, can't exercise anymore, and I think I am developing some kind of intolerance for meds and some vitamins (hope it's not CMAS ). So i am really struggling at the moment, as before this week, I was sleeping better, I could exercise some, lower anxiety, no burning and pins & needles, no inner trembling, no depression and fatigue and probably no med intolerance. I was a long time lurker here, so you don't know me, but I already read probably most of yours stories, so I am familiar with your struggles too... hope u all get better soon. I already read important things, like coping with emotions (not working right now), how long this is gonna take, about kindling, abour ADR, so I am mostly covered with knowledge. I have a question, if this is adverse reaction, why the heck I am getting worse after 19 months in? Shouldn't it be more linear healing? 😔 This is just pure torture. Thanks for listening and your replies in advance.
  14. Posting this success story is long overdue. I am pleased to say that I am fully recovered. I was mostly recovered at around 18-24 months but still suffered the odd niggling wave. I have been entirely symptom free for over 2 years now. I have so much respect for the people on here, giving support to those who are suffering. Thank you. I don't come on here much but I do check in. I'm open to PMs, especially if I can help anyone suffering during and after a reaction.
  15. Hello all, In 2009 I had an adverse reaction to only 4 pills of Lexapro (Escitalopram) which took me around 4.5 years to recover from. My road was a very bumpy one as I had lots of waves, so it was very difficult for me to see where I was in the recovery process. And though it took a lot of time to really feel recovered, in the end I did. So to everyone who is still in the thick of it, keep on going and remind yourself that even if you do not feel well at the moment, the next big recovery step can be right around the corner. I cannot recount how often I was about to lose hope when the next bad wave struck and I thought that this is my life now. But it isn't. I wish you all a steady recovery. As hard as it may seem now, it will get better eventually! All the best, Maybe
  16. It was 1980, and started to develop severe headaches (Clusters?) like a hot knife in my head on a daily basis. I thought I had a brain tumor. I wound up at a neurologist and was prescribed Tofranil, for head/neck pain, without being told about side effects. There was no internet/side effects papers with the meds that I could look up. Shortly after taking them I started to feel foggy, (which I thought was normal) then I experienced ringing in my ears, electric feeling in my nerves, nightmares, feeling depersonalized, hallucinations. I remembering saying to myself it cant be Torfranil, the doctor said it was for pain. After 1-2 months I stopped taking Tofranil, and anything else (vitamins etc). It took a year plus, for the symptoms to subside, some quicker than others, yet it was like I was at times observing myself when I would be at work or home. Very scary/unnerving experience. Lots of exercise, progressive relaxation helped me, but there was a lot of trial and error. I recently saw somebody from that time in my life and these memories flooded back. I felt the need to understand what happen to me, and with some Google research I discovered the symptoms were a adverse side effect to Tofranil. I wanted to share this, to provide some insight/hope to others that are experiencing troubling symptoms.
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