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Hi, I’m new hear, I’m sorry if I have any gramatical errors, my native language isn’t English. I’m 18 years old female, I started sertraline at 14 and was been on and off sertraline (I used it total for about 2-3 years) I started when I was 14 and Stopped at 17. My last dose was about 4 months ago and I was on sertraline for 4 months (50 mg I think). I stopped because I learned about pssd. However I don’t think I tappered correctly. I didn’t knew how to. I’m now battling with pssd, a really severe depression, really severe derealization, brain fog, and I’m really suicidal. I don’t know what to do, I’m really really bad mentally and I’m desperate for help, for someone to bring hope to my life, but I don’t want to go with a psychiatrist, should I go with a therapist/ psychologist? I’m extremely depressed and derealized and can’t stop thinking about killing myself. (I’m not sure if I can talk about this here, but I really need help). I just want some hope about pssd, I’ve read here that pssd is just like any withdrawal symptom, it can take years to get better but it will improve and I really wish this happens, I also really wish to be myself again and not want desperately to die.
I don't even know where to begin and I may be one of the worst cases I've seen on here with my plethora of drugs I'm on and my life situation that seems to make it close to impossible to take care of myself. Currently I'm about 8 days (I think) cold turkey off lexapro 10 mgs. I tried tapering but the withdrawals started as soon as I started tapering and then I reinstated back to 10mgs, then went cold turkey because the headache, sinus pressure,anxiety,anger,sadness,tooth and jaw pain were unreal. Of course being cold turkey has not cleared up any of that and if anything it's worse. To add insult to injury literally, and being absolutely stupid I decided to start the process of having a bunch of dental work done while in the throws of withdrawals. I am having 8 veneers, 2 root canals and had my right canine (eye tooth) pulled so not putting two and two together I thought all this dental work was the cause of my withdrawal symptoms. I even went on a heavy duty antibiotic because I thought I had a sinus infection. My dentist has been at a lose as to whats wrong with me because I should not be having such insane headaches,neck and jaw pain a month later from the dental work. This is all lexapro withdrawalls!!!! I also have a script for adderall ir 20mgs twice daily but I stopped that 2 days ago to see if that would decrease my anxiety, it hasn't seemed to. I want off the adderall also but I'm now thinking I can only manage one thing at a time. I have xanax 1mg for occasional use but lately I've needed it almost every 2 days. I luckily do not have a addiction or dependency on benzos. I have Ambein for sleep that typically I only use maybe twice a week but since all this started I've used it almost nightly:( I also have 800 mg Motrin, 5 mg Vicodin that was prescribed for the dental work but actually came in handy for this insane headache from lexapro wds. To make matters more stressful I have a 6 month old sweet baby, 18 month old teething sweet baby and a hormonal 11 year old sweet girl:) THANK GOD I have a amazing, supportive husband but he can only handle so much. Where do I begin?! I have been determined to keep going since I made it this far but I'm not getting much better. My Pdoc is all about drugs so he will say I need to try something new. I know this was a stupid, irresponsible idea to go ct off lexapro I certainly underestimated this drug. I need support and should I not use the Ambein or xanax to combat the insomnia from the lexapro ct? I'm dizzy, foggy and my entire face hurts from tension and anxiety:(