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  1. I do not know if this is the right thread, though I have also some new problems with my foot muscles. Around 2 or 3 months ago, I was using a pedal boat with a friend when I was feeling quite fine. Problem is, I got sore muscles in my feet which took 3 to 4 weeks!!! to go away. And now my left foot is weird, i cannot use it 100% correctly. Hard to describe, but it flaps around somehow. I am really losing my faith in recovery and my enjoyment of life. Physically I was 100% fit, trained and feeling great. Is there anyone who had "only" physical symptoms that far out and still recovered? Most of those who have recovered spoke of improvements earlier or at 2 years out, but I get even worse.
  2. I've been on SSRIs (first paxil, then prozac) for 20 years now, and over that time I've had 2 persistent, untreatable nerve injuries, and a bizarre twitch that happens in my thigh. All of these have defied exhaustive attempts at medical diagnosis or treatment; they have just been called neurological issues of unknown origin. After exploring every conceivable option in standard medicine, alternative medicine, multiple surgeries, and every type of treatment I can possibly think of, I've started wondering if the issues could be caused by the long-term usage of SSRIs. Have anyone else experienced bizarre, untreatable chronic pain issues that were caused by their SSRI usage? Or has anyone here encountered such information online? I'm wondering if this is something I should pursue. thanks, Bart
  3. I don't find informations about it in the site (but if it's not a right place to post it, please some moderators to move it). I would to ask if someone tried this supplement often prescribed for fibromyalgic pain (that sometimes could be similar to pain induced by WD) and had some benefits. Here some informations (from Wikipedia): https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Palmitoylethanolamide
  4. Tapering Abilify too fast, now at 5 percent health issues and sleep issues Hi there. Thanks in advance for reading this long post. If it helps you in anyway I am glad. If not please disregard. I am not a health professional or taper expert. What is good for me may not work for you. Tapering on my own because my old prescriber no longer felt I should. I am on a second attempt to taper abilify. The most I took was 7mg. I tapered at a 5 to 10 percent rate jumped off at .7 and wound up in hospital due to sleep issues hearing voices and mother who called ambulance because she. was worried (also was not aware I was tapering). I agreed with my doctor upon discharge to reinstate at 2 mg and lithium 600. I I was on that dose for about 5 months. For the first week took prn of klonapin .5 and seroquel 100(which I stayed on until sleep was normal and less anxiety for about a week then cut in half a couple days and then stooped. I was also taking 600 mg of lithium. When I decided to try a taper again I also switched to lithium orotate 15 mg, which I had done during previous taper over about 8 months. During that 8 month period I felt fine and that the taper was going well. For aches pains and mild anxiety I used cbd thc and kratom. On vacation I went off the weed traveling abroad for one week. Also forgot abilify so jumped off. Upon return decide to stay off abilify. A month later upon returning felt anxious with some voice hearing with only a few hours sleep each night. I felt lost in need of help but unable to get it from either professionals or peers. Now I have a therapist who knows I am tapering and friend and family members who provide support as well as extra help I can call on in the form of a somatic therapist and a med free coach. This time around I want to be smarter. My original cut was 25 percent which I was on for about 5 weeks. At that time I started having severe debilitating pain in my shoulder. I thought it might relate to an old injury. I was taking a turmeric supplement plus cbd and cannabis as was usual for me. I went to a chiropractor. The pain was only affected a bit. I also started pain in spine, back and other old injured areas. It has been a couple of weeks and in this time the pain moved to my gut. I stopped taking the turmeric and added some supplements to remedy my apparent inability to tolerate sulfur foods. Over the past few days I have noticed mood and cognitive issues and sleep issues. I slowed taper to 5 percent. I am off weed, cbd coffee alcohol too because I can barely tolerate food and I realize I am having withdrawal as well as gut issues possibly from the turmeric. I have had similar gut issues when not tapering in the past so I had a clue to look at sulfur/thiols issues. Where I am now, why I am here, and what I am looking for.. Last night I broke down and took a seroquel 50. I took it because sleep is so important to me and I felt I was in a dire situation., iI did sleep for 4 hours so I took another 50 and woke about 4 or 5 hours later.. I also ate some rice with digestive enzymes that I researched and seemed safe. It feel like a relief and felt at one point like I felt safe for the first time in the past few days. I know seroquel is not the answer. I am motivated to heal my whole self. I want to be off abilify and antipsychotics and if possible all drugs because I want to be the real authentic me. I must say that through this process I have felt glimpses of that. More creative more intuitive more loving more sexy more compassionate. Today I feel okay (though I do not like affects of seroquel). I was able to eat with no pain. I feel relatively stable. My plan is to stay at the 5 percent taper at 1.95 using my digital scale. Which I take at 2 pm daily. I may take seroquel for a few days at 100 before bed with my lithium. The only other changes I plan is to add a probiotic similar to one I have taken before. I plan to stay 6 weeks at this dose provided things are ok. I came here to share my experience and to seek support in any form, and just to say hi. I have read and posted before. Glad to be here. In solidarity, Kathy
  5. Hey everybody, for the third time within a year (and the second time since the middle of june this year) I experienced severe effects from a (low) dose of sertraline on my stomach and it feels like this time I done fucked up. Since three weeks after that last (12,5mg) dose of sertralin (stopped the taking immediately) I'm having a burning sensation as well as a hollow pain in my stomach (not the colon or small intestine), an inability to normally digest just eaten food resulting in burping up stomach content and the feeling of a balloon trapped below the last rib on the left. In addition to that, since the beginning of week 3, I have a nearly constant urge to burp (air), but the inability to do so for most of the time, which drives me crazy! The urge gets more present if I swallow a little sth, be it water or food, and (and thats curious) when I get up, meaning my chest is in a vertical position. I know these conditions since the last time I took a sertraline pill on an empty stomach only (yeah I'm dumb for taking it just with water), but it went away after 2 weeks. Now we are in week 4. Also I had learned sth from the previous mistake and took the pill after food recently - apparently it wasnt enough...or too soon after the meal; cause here we are. To clear things up: I stopped the medication right after the first incident in mid june (was on 50mg sertralin for like 6 weeks until this date) and only wanted to cushion some withdrawal symptoms with the latest low dose in early july and then this happened. In hindsight, I should have sticked with those symptoms instead of losing 6kg in 3 weeks as a 70kg male and all the mean stuff above. I know there are several reports about heartburn etc. but can someone actually explain what's in the sertraline that effects the stomach the moment it's in it (literally felt the balloon getting infalted at that moment) - shouldnt be the active ingredient itself (since it gets absorbed later in the gut) but some other ingredients!? Does it make a difference if I break the pill in pieces? And why the hell does it say "take with or without food" in the leaflet? Does any of you had similar experiences with sertraline (zoloft)? Did it make a difference for you to take it with food, or experienced some of you the same even if they had a meal before (would bring some inner peace to me). I think I have a severe chemical-toxical induced gastritis, probalby getting chronic atm. I'm on 40mg of esomeprazol since last week, no difference since. Would you up the dose? Swallowing the endoscope tomorrow, curious and anxious at the same time about the probable certainty 😕 Thanks much for reading through this and even more gratitude for replying! PS: please forgive eventual mistakes as i am no native speaker! Michael.
  6. First of all thank you for the support you give on this site. I am from Spain, using Google translator. I started with psychiatric medications at age 16 from panic attacks, I'm currently 37. I've been trying to quit the medications for two years. Before starting the last withdrawal I was taking: EFFEXOR XR 150 mg1-0-0; TRANKIMAZIN RETARD 1mg 1-0-1; MIRTAZAPINE 15 mg 0-0-1. In January 2019 I started withdrawing TRANKIMAZIN 0.5 mg every 15 days; at the end of the cone I did not recover from withdrawal symptoms but despite that when the withdrawal of TRANKIMAZIN ends I began with the withdrawal of EFFEXOR. I removed 0.75 mg of EFFEXOR for two months. At this point I was very tired, I had muscular stiffness in my neck and many pains and had gained a lot of weight, I decided to remove MIRTAZAPINE first to see if the symptoms described above were solved. From there I eliminate MIRTAZAPINE in just one week, five months ago. There begins the greatest abstinence hell I've ever lived; panic attacks every thirty minutes, vomiting, diarrhea, sensitivity to light and sound, itching and skin sensitivity, burning eyes, lack of appetite, muscle aches throughout the body, extreme fatigue, anhedonia, depersonalization, dizziness ... As the symptoms were intolerable, reading in this forum that a benzodiazepine can help I start with DIAZEPAM. 2.5 mg - 0 - 2.5. The benzo works and the symptoms become more tolerable. the panic attacks almost disappear and I start eating a little. From this moment I try to hold on to see if the symptoms disappear. Today, sensitivity to light and sound, skin sensitivities have improved, I have no insomnia, no vomiting or diarrhea. However, I have had to abandon all my daily activities because any effort makes me feel very sick (flu symptoms). prolonged anhedonia and depersonalization have led me to a deep depression. My life is to be asleep as long as possible because the reality is too distressing, I have no appetite, I live with demotivation and hopelessness and ideas of death. I do not know if all these symptoms are an accumulation of the different withdrawals or are due exclusively to MIRTAZAPINE. I am afraid of restoring medication because my quality of life with her was very poor, the EFFEXOR caused my personality changes and psychic changes that wreaked havoc on my life. I would like to know what you think and what you would do in these difficult times. It is very difficult in Spain to find medical support that belives my story. Thanks for your support.
  7. Hi everyone. I've been browsing this site for a couple of years and thought I'd finally join. I'd love to be able to talk with others about what I'm going through. I'm only 22 but I've pretty much been through every hell imaginable in terms of SSRI use (I started when I was 5--not by choice, obviously). It really frustrates me because I never even chose myself to go on these medications, I had very bad tantrums and anxiety as a small child and a psychiatrist put me on them. As I got older, instead of being told to get therapy and try getting off them, she just kept raising the dosage. By age 12 I was on the maximum dose even though my problems weren't that severe. I remember being in middle school gaining weight, feeling tired CONSTANTLY, just not feeling like a kid at a ll, and at the time no one thought that the medication could be the reason for it. It's so upsetting because I feel as though my entire life up until this point has been taken from me and Ill never experience what it's like to be young and happy. Like I said I never showed depressive symptoms before the medication but as the dose was raised I would occasionally get depression symptoms. When I was 15/16 I was switched to celexa which actually "worked" quite a bit better for me, I lost a lot of weight and felt energetic and motivated, but by the time I was 18 I really wanted off of these drugs that weren't even my choice to go on. However, as I learned the hard way psychiatrists don't have a good understanding of what's required for a successful taper. I was then on 40mg, and she lowered it all the way to 30, and then quickly after that to 20. This all happened right before I went away to university for the first time, so it was just horrible timing. My first month of college I noticed I began to feel severe chest pain. I didn't know what was happening and it was very scary. My entire freshman year I essneitllay spent in severe burning pain all across my chest and upper back. I would be doubled over crying for much of the day because of the pain. I went to see SO many doctors about it but they all said I was perfectly healthy and it must be from anxiety or just 'in my head'. I had to leave college after my first year because of the pain. By this point I was completely off of the celexa because I didn't know what was happening and I thought the pain was being caused solely by the drug itself. But the pain didn't get any better, it got worse. I basically spent the next 3 years (not an exaggeration) bedridden crying in pain. I cannot even describe in words how severe the pain was. And the problem was no one even considered that it was due to withdrawal because every doctor I went to said no, withdrawal wouldn't cause pain like that. So it was just a constant 'search' to figure out why I was having this mysterious pain. Even when I went back on the celexa to see if it would help, it wouldn't get rid of the pain, but I believe that's because (as I later found), the only way to get rid of it is by going on the HIGHEST possible dose because that's the highest dose my body was accustomed to. Finally last year I tried Zoloft out of desperation (I was missing my whole youth...I feel like my situation is a lot different because I spent 18-21 bedridden in pain. I know I could "wait it out" a few more years...but I'm missing my entire youth, a period fo my life I won't get back, and I don't know how much longer my college is going to let me take time off. I should have already graduated by now :(. It's so painful to be in so much pain while other people your age are having the time of your lives.) So even though I hate these medications, I tried Zoloft in a desperate attempt to just be out of pain and be able to move forward with my life. By the time I reached 150mg my pain went away completely (after 4 months on it), but of course I have other side effects on it I do not like like loss of creativity (I want to be a musician, and I love art), not feeling emotions as deeply, and almost feeling like your'e living life in a fog. To be blunt I don't feel "myself" on it. My individual spark is gone. But, I was just so desperate to get rid fo the physical pain. Anyway I made a freaking stupid decision in May to go off of it. At this point me and my doctors still didn't 100% make the connection between the pain and withdrawal, it was just a 'theory'. I thought my pain could have lessened because I had a boyfriend and friends now, was in school, feeling better, was out of pain to the point I was exercising consistently, etc. Well, nope lol. All of my pain returned this month. I'm back to being in bed with pain I'm in a huge dilemma because I know from past experience the pain DOES NOT go away. It's weird because I don't have any mental symptoms from going off the medication. I don't feel any more anxious/depressed/etc. The symptoms are all physical for me. It's just the most severe pain imaginable. I'm sure it's some type of nerve damage because it feels like burning knives stabbing into me..no words can describe the pain. I just want the pain gone as soon as possible, but I know if I go back on the medication I have to say goodbye to who I am as a person and my musical talent. I don't know what I'm supposed to do. Like I said, I have already missed so much of my life. I don't want to be bedridden from pain anymore 😞 It just hurts so much. And it's not even my fault because I never chose to go on this medication!! I feel like I'm screwed for life, and will never have a full life devoid of both pain and of the medication. What if I just never adjust to being off of it because I started so young? I just hope some people here can offer me advice on how to eliminate it without having pain like this. I just cannot stand the pain... I'm sorry this is so long but like all of you, my story is long! To make it easier if someone is just skimming, withdrawal symptoms include - severe burning / stabbing pain in upper back, chest, shoulders - occasional hip pain and inability to walk because of it - digestive problems (extreme bloating, heartburn) - lightheadedness when standing up at times - basically feel like all my nerves are on fire - chest tightness 24/7
  8. I wanted to share my story, hopefully I can find someone that can identify themselves with my ordeal and possibly help each other. I still can't believe I'm typing this out, its all very surreal to me, I never in my life would have imagined that, at age of 21, I'd be tossed into this mess. Not only dealing with anxiety but now terrible thoughts of suicide ever since getting PSSD. I was given Trazodone 50mg after having problems sleeping on July, I told my doctor I had some issues sleeping, she then proceeded to ask some mental health questions and I told her I had minimal anxiety and that whether I had depression was debatable.I only took the pills 3 times, I stopped after realizing I could barely get an erection. Then came the initial crash, there was pain in my testicles that felt like blue balls, the veins in my testicles got inflamed and painful especially when I got an erection. I ended up jerking off, I thought it would alleviate the pain and go away, the semen was unusual, I never came so much in my life but the consistency was watery. I also suffered from terrible abdominal and pelvic pain which has gone at least 90% away in the two months that followed, it was annoying and really hard to concentrate on my studies but I thank God that’s gotten better. I'm not sure how common this is but I feel like my left ******** shrunk, I wonder if anyone on trazodone or other anti-depressants has had shrinkage of only one of their testicles. I also have Urinary incontincancy.It got to a point where I had to tell my parents, it was embarrassing, I cried and told them these pills changed me and that I'm not ok. I was pretty much saying my goodbyes, it's so easy to just end the pain and kill myself but after a long discussion I'm going to wait this out as long as I possibly can. I can't just do this to them, they’ve suffered so much and given me more than I could ever ask for, I can't end my life knowing I'd leave them in so much emotional suffering.I posted my story on another forum as well. Could this be PSSD, chemical epididimytis, prostatitis, pelvic floor dysfunciton? The symptoms with many of these conditions seem to over lap, What I do know is these problems are directly due to Trazodone. I'm just not sure where to go with this problem now, I honestly can't see myself living a whole year with this.
  9. I've had a bad day today and have spent most of it looking for help with acceptance, which might have been a subtle way of trying to avoid what I was actually feeling, but anyway, this was helpful, so I thought I would share it. In this video, Eckhart Tolle, talks about how to surrender to the circumstances of life, even the painful ones, and in this way we are able to transform the way we experience life, creating peace for ourselves rather than suffering. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BqQ5USouOq0
  10. Hello, people! I ask you that question in the topic title, so I am pretty sure what exactly is my problem and it is supressed deep fear and aslo not feeling the pain which i am sure is healthy to feel in my situation. But when i try to feel the pain or the fear i can't do it to the point i know i should. I am taking Zyprexa and Abilify for 3 years and for these 3 years i was strugling searching, trying to understand what is going on with me and what exactly is my problem. i read a lot of books and articles. watched a lot af videos and now i finally realized what i needed. But i think Zyprexa and Abilify are blocking my negative emotions. i am not sure this but i think it is true. That is my question. Do these drugs actually supress negative emotions like pain and fear? Thank you in advance!
  11. I'm not really looking for advice but just musing here! There is something that makes withdrawal/side effect thoughts 'painful'. When people say they are just thoughts they cannot hurt you, that doesn't seem altogether true. I can detach myself from thoughts some of the time and dismiss them as thoughts but the thoughts that come in a bad wave and have plagued me throughout the yrs on ad's do seem to be painful, excruciating even and I don't seem to be able to distance myself from them at all. Wonder what that's about.
  12. I just watched this video of an interview with Philip Jacobs. I found some of his ideas helpful for understanding illness as part of a larger, more positive picture, he writes: 'I had always previously thought that it was possible to change my attitude to any situation. With the illness, I realized that there was a stage where you couldn't. You could have a good attitude either side of the experience, but not while you were in it. This was when the illness was deep in the brain, there was no way out until it passed and you just had to allow the experience to be what it was and if it was darkness then it was just darkness.' I was having to assimilate the idea of illness and suffering as a gift - what looked like suffering on the physical and psychological levels could often have a transforming effect on the deeper spiritual levels, that may not be apparent to the casual observer.'
  13. Hello all! I am very new to this forum. I found it while searching for help tapering and managing withdrawal symptoms. From what I have read so far, I am not alone here. I was diagnosed with Bipolar II disorder, major depression, and generalized anxiety disorder between 2006 and 2008. I used to have horrible panic attacks(that would even cause ticks), and I almost never left the house. Since then, my psychiatrist has tweaked doses of anti-depressants, mood-stabilizers, benzodiazapines, and more recently added Pregabalin to the mixture. I feel as if though I can function much better, and I have even been able to go for my AA degree. Here's my problem: I do NOT want to be on the Pregabalin. I know very little about it, and yet it has caused me serious pain and discomfort. It helps greatly with the anxiety, but my body is dependent upon it and my memory is very foggy. I feel trapped, because I just cannot come off of it alone. Stopping it completely is NOT an option. Around 48 hours after stopping, serious withdrawal kicks in--nausea, vomiting, join pain, head pain, GI problems and pain, serious fatigue, suicidal thoughts and much more. This is by far the worst sickness that I have ever been through. It feels worse than the flu. I don't know much about tapering, but I think if I want to stick with capsules, I can go down 25mg at a time with it. If that's too much, I could possibly ask for it in liquid form. I am afraid. Any encouraging words will help. The suicidal thoughts are the worst part..
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