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  1. Hello all I started on Mertazapine for some slight insomnia (probably now I realise related to menopause). I had no idea about the drug. I thought it was just a sleeping pill and messed around with the dose and eventually came off 30 mg to 15 mg over a period of 3 weeks. I suffered horrible withdrawal, was then told it was the drug and was taken straight off it to 0 mg at which point I became a total insomniac and suicidal and was detained in the NHS psych ward. In hospital I was forced to reinstate - they put me straight back on 30 mg after 2 days on 15 mg. I felt slightly better and was able to convince them to let me leave after 2 weeks. This took an enormous act of will, but I knew I could not stay in there. I was also given zopiclone, promethezine, and then propanalol. I am now a week out of hospital and suffering all the tortures of hell. I stopped taking the zopiclone, promethezine, propanalol not wanting to add any more to the cocktail. The sleep has returned to the tune of maybe 5-6 hours a night. I take 5 mg of diazapam also at night which I started in February to try and relieve the sleep anxiety which it did temporarily. But the panic, anxiety, numbness in my limbs, burning brain/body and akasthisia have not relented (not even bothering to list all symptoms). So I am 3 weeks into reinstatement of 30 mg mertazapine, and staying on the 5 mg diazepam out of pure fear of adding any withdrawal from that to the horrible reinstatement symptoms. After reading around on this site (when I can at least focus) I've come to the conclusion I have to endure the 30 mg reinstatement and pray for some kind of stablilization, before making any further tapers. Praying for all that are going through this and wishing you strength.
  2. Hi all. I’m writing on behalf of my husband. Bit of background: 2003 was put on Prozac for 3 months- no adverse reaction and subsequently various doses of venlafaxine which he successfully came off of with no issues. 2013 was switched from Venlafaxine to sertraline. Had ‘activation syndrome’ (extreme anxiety) for 8 weeks (always thought it was him) but went away once body used to drug. August 2021 had been on 25mg for years and thought he would taper over 2 months, successfully came off no issues or problems. january 2022- I was having a C section and he was a bit worried, nothing extreme though, just normal worry and decided to reinstate the Sertraline. Within days, ‘activation syndrome’ was back. He stayed on for 5 weeks and then doctor said ‘come off as you weren’t anxious or depressed to start with’ symptoms of withdrawal started but manageable. He thought after 6 weeks that it wasn’t withdrawal as nhs website said it should have gone after 2 weeks! March 2022- started mirtazapine at 15mg going up to 30mg. Fine for 3 weeks, but then developed activation syndrome and quickly came off. GP advised to go back on to sertraline at a bigger dose- ended up in a and e, so agitated! 3 weeks later, he thought that the mirtazapine might be less activating at a smaller dose, so went back on at 15mg… alas, 3 weeks later, activation syndrome is back! june 5th came off and has been battling severe anxiety, but generally, every other day! I am aware of windows and waves but don’t understand this. One day he’s perfect and the next can’t leave the house! He also started propanalol in June which we feel makes it worse as apparently it blocks seritonin to a degree, but makes anxiety a lot worse if he reduces (or maybe he did too big a jump). NHS have left us to it, no help! Have a private appointment on Monday. Questions are: If he is getting windows this early on, is it a good sign?! The only symptom he has is extreme anxiety/agitation which seems more a reaction to lack of seritonin, thus firing out tons of cortisol? Could he go on a low dose of Prozac to see if that helps? Prozac is the only antidepressant he doesn’t think caused activation syndrome?! is there any experiences with propanalol making matters worse? I think there is a slight improvement in the anxiety but considering it’s only been out of his system for 6 weeks I expect takes a lot longer to build new pathways etc/level out. Thanks for reading. Just want my husband back, it’s destroying me and him!
  3. WARNING. This is very long and took me hours to write. I didnt know what to include. I figured more information was more information so.. Here it all is. If anyone has advice on what i should cut please do advise! TLDR is i accidentally went cold turkey off 2.5 1x week Escitalopram, have been treating it all wrong with propanolol, thc and cbd. Countless mood and physical symptoms. Believe I have kindled and made going back on impossible. Scared to wait this out incase of psychosis. Scared to reinstate. Terrified of everything and tired and unable to sleep. Okay, I dont know what to write here, so ill give a small summary background and history I took from my summary for applying for the board. My mental health and my lack of steady GP has made finding dates VERY hard and I went through a lot of patchy on off med periods so its a little unclear, sorry. I did my best to match referrals and old receipts for rough dating. History- Depression and suicidality 2003~2013. 2013, suddenly panic attacks and anxiety, went to psych, was prescribed Sertraline, unsure dose. 2013~ 2016 Sertraline - Felt no better & hated side effects so CT. Didn't notice WD. Tried Desvenfalaxine, then Fluoxetine. No improvement on depression within months like I wanted, side effects too horrible. CT off both. Tried Escitalopram, helped panic attacks. CT off all and no WD noticed. During these years I was bad, very depressed, barely left bed, would hold jobs for months and then drop. Mostly same since 2003. 2016~2019 Mental Health crisis around August 2016 led to being in and out of ER, decided reinstate medication. 40mg Escitalopram initially followed by addition of Wellbutrin, 75 up to 150mg. Escitalopram reduced to 20mg sometime btwn August 2016 and Feb 2017, then down to 10mg by July 2017. All unsupervised tapers, doctors saw my doses changing and were unphased. No WD experienced. Stabilized. Struggled with depression and anxiety, but no panic. No suicidality. 2019-2020 Started to be lax with occasionally not taking meds. Stopped Zyban cold turkey during 2020 or 2019 due to night sweats, feeling stable and feeling like it affected my memory. Ocasional forgetting to take escitalopram for a few days. Mostly stable Escitalopram at 10mg. 2020-2022 Minor depression but the best i had been, even before meds. Have not had suicidal feelings in 6 years, no panic attacks. I spent years slowly working up a reward system for myself to encourage myself to do things like shower daily, cook and eat real food. During this time none of that is an effort and I begin adding to things. I institute a cleaning schedule with WEEKLY house cleaning. I cook. I eat regularly. I exercise on and off. I feel stable and HAPPY for the first time ever. Even my hard days pale in comparison and instead of not leaving bed or eating for 30hrs my worst times are a week where my chores are a bit lax. I get a job by CHOICE. But I begin to notice through this two things - I went on Escitalopram to manage panic attacks and now im only having mild anxiety... But I have TERRIBLE emotional blunting. I can't laugh, I can‘t cry. Bad things will happen and I can feel it like a pressure under the surface. I even listen to sad things to TRY and cry and nothing. I begin to try and taper. To be honest I think I tried CT and the brainzaps put me off. Over 2020 maybe, but mostly 2021, I Taper unsupervised down to 5mg daily... then every other day I try and push it and only take meds when noticing brainzaps. I DO NOT KNOW that means withdrawal or that i am essentially entering withdrawal every few weeks. Noticing 5 is still producing annoying blunting I go down to taking 2.5 1-2x week by late 2021, only when I have brainzaps. I told doctors about this and nobody said anything, nobody said not to do this! During 2020~2021 I start to, in retrospect, have what was probably withdrawal symptoms. My Anxiety has waves and days or weeks of being moderately bad in a way I've never experienced. I latch on to certain almost intrusive worries and struggle with them a lot. I begin to obsess about finances, my weight, healthy food, calories etc. It only gets as bad as mild crying on some intermittent days tho. Its draining but liveable. This makes me more encouraged to try and not take Escitalopram as I have never found it helpful for my general anxiety and rumination and would like to find something not blunting. November through January I feel my best ever. I start a new job and have a week in January this year where I take 5mg because im struggling with anxiety, then went back down to 2.5 “as needed” Mild brain zaps in February, twice I have days where i feel derealized and dizzy, but hours later i have a migraine so unsure if withdrawal or symptons of migraine. Start to feel mildly depressed early March - My contract at my Job is up and its the first job I have managed 2 days a week at without burning out. The depression feels rational though, im worrying about ever having real money or holding down a full time job, since my “best” I still cant handle it. This still feels like my depression. I try and stick to the 2.5 because it wards off brainzaps, but i dont feel emotionally blunted. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ WD AND CURRENT ISSUES START HERE. 17/03 2022 Sudden HARD crash. I feel.. weird.Dizzy, so dizzy i feel like im falling over. Spacey, nauseous. I take my 2.5 but it does not improve. First panic attack in 6 years on the 19th. On 20th Tried reinstate at 5mg, just in a prayer for stability, not knowing what is happening. Maybe mild help at most. I wake up having a panic attack at 4am the 21st and cant calm down. derealization, nausea.. I see the GP on the 21st, he says my dosage was so low as to be pretty much nonexistant and taking the meds again wont give relief. I feel like im going insane because I can feel calm mentally and start having panic attacks out of nowhere. I stil feel okay emotionally but this is eating at me. Put on propanolol every 4 hrs as needed, when i first take it and the physical symptoms calm down I feel INSTANT relief and cry. 21st-But, for the first time ever I have insomnia- Ive always fallen asleep at like 2-4am and awake at 10-12, but during depression usually I am a sleep for 16hrs straight type. Im having migraine headaches, i cant keep food down. Im mixing antiemetics and propnaolol. I feel SO DIZZY i lay in bed all night feeling like im falling. I take a maxalt and manage an hour and a half sleep for the first time in two days. 22ng I begin to suspect withdrawal now. Net says 3wks so I decide to try and hold. I distract myself by cleaning, I start having hot and cold flushes. Laying in bed gives me panic attacks. I get dizzy and scared of more panic attacks and not sleeping ever again, followed by heart pounding and shaking and hot and cold flushes back to back for hours. I take two temazepam i found that expired in 2019 and feel no better, sleep an hour or so. 23rd. Messaging my mum everyday, she wants me to try CBD and THC. I get an appointment. Im starting to feel less panicky per day, only random attacks rather than back to back all day, seemingly untriggered, sudden chills and heart pounding. Except if I lay down, then I always panic. I try the couch and the floor, i try breathing exercises and progressive muscle relaxation. I go buy Restavit. I emotionally collapse. I barely remember this so here is what I sent my mother> “ Last night was ***** at first. Hysterical crying on the floor, felt like I was dying, [partner] even went searching for valium bc i was so ***** but found none. Went to bed early and was exhausted but still could not pass out for an hour of panic(continous chills and feeling like i had been dunked in cold water and shaking and chest felt tight etc). Took the sedatives and still could not, got up and paced around for a bit which felt SO funny bc I was dizzy and struggling to walk but if I stopped I panicked so I was just stumbling back and forth around the kitchen. I went back to bed and eventually somewhere between 5am and 9am passed out and then slept until frickin 6pm. Beginning to suspect its some weird delayed onset ssri discontinuation syndrome. It kinda FEELS physically like getting brainzaps does. The fact its random out of nowhere, no trigger, cant calm myself mwntally, comes in waves, so much worse at night. I feel a lot better today. Not even taken a single beta blocker. Chest has been a bit tight all day and struggling a bit with feeling like nothing is real. Starting to have scalp crawling tingles now so hopefully not gonna be a repeat of last night.”. Prescribed THc and CBD oils. The next few days are a fog and I dont message my mum so Im unsure what happened. I know my panic attacks started to not happen I know they stopped around saturday the 26th so I stop taking propanolol. I know my insomnia sucked. I took restavit a few times during this, it helped twice and didnt twice. I started to feel okay and even good on sunday and monday. My anxiety was a 4~5 on this day from the 7~10 it had been. By 29th of March I begin my THC and CBD and am not feeling good. I take my CBD to no effect. The THC makes me feel GOOD. Not euphoric but the closest to how i felt emotionally and anxiety wise for the first time since this started. But dont even manage the 4hrs of sleep ive gotten the last few days. I think this is a BAD idea bc I start to feel BAD on the 30th and panicky again. I dont remember this week well. I have no messages during this time. I take CBD 0.125ml at 100mg per ml on 29, 30th, 31st and 0.25 on the first. Nothing, maybe minorly more anxiety. THC is a 10thc15cbd per ml mix. I take 0.25ml 29, 30th at 7:44pm AND 144 am And take a restavit and STILL can not fall asleep and feel nothing on the 30th. I try 0.5 on the first, I actually do sleep. I take 0.5 on the 02 and cant sleep at all again. I feel focused and calm and awake so I drop them both. I convince myself all the other websites are right and look to the 7th as a day all will resolve. On and off dizzyness and constant insomnia this week, falling asleep for barely 4 hrs most nights. Tummy and appetite issuesstill but no panic. My mood effects start coming in this week. I flip between total fog inability to engage with or enjoy anything zoned out on the couch for hours exhausted and existing, to crying spells of hours out of nowhere. But I can eat without nausea most days and I can do some cooking, i manage to cook two meals for mt partner. I start to notice fluey symptoms~ body aches and post nasal drip and cough. On the 6th I start thinking about giving up on holding. I cant stop sobbing hystericallt all day. take some thc at 0.25 ml and despite barely any effects on 0.5 I feel kinda high. My mood and appetite feel really good and I have mild warm and fuzzies. I crash though and cant sleep and after the come down im shaky "my nervous system is so fried. went to bed at 4, fell asleep at 1030am. slept from then till 11:40, then 12:25 to 1:30 then 1:40 to 4:30. maybe 4 and a half hours total. I feel wide awake but also tired the whole time and cant tell if im falling asleep. Im scared of benzos as a solution tho" Im beginning to be scared of how im effecting my partner and his mood and sleep as my only support. I had two good days again that week and went out one day. I am struggling emotionally more and more. I cant be alone or I spiral. I sit in my partners room on the floor while I scroll, being in a room with someone helps. I take restavit for the fifth time in two weeks on the 7th. Ive had mixed results and groggyness 12hrs later but im desperate so I take 50mg. I SLEEP. The next few days I take 25mg, I wake up every two to four hours but I manage 6 hours. Even if I take restavit at midnight I dont fall asleep till 8 am most days but SLEEP IS SWEET RELIEF. Still anhedonic and weepy. Dont manage chores this week. ~~~~~~~~~~~~ Which brings us to the last few days. A fresh hell. Im struggling. Not distracting myself. Thoughts start to get worse. 10th i cry and obsess till bed time about how I will be stuck like this forever. I get stuck on the idea that even if I go back on my meds I can only work 2 days a week. I get stuck on obsessing about money. All the therapists in my area are 100~800$. How will I ever get therapy and get better. How will I ever get on disability with no proper history. 11th is my worst day yet. I cry about that some more. I cry about being stuck like this. About a two year possible taper. About why am i having WD symptoms. About fear of waiting this out and it not getting better. Fear of going back on and kindling happening bc I ***** myself up with the once a week bullsh*t. And then having to go through this anyway. About a two year taper of no emotions. About not having sleep at all without restavit no matter what I do. I take 0.25 mg of thc in the afternoon. I feel euphoric and quite high. Then I feel BAD about that. What if i have to get high every day to cope? My boyfriend has addiction history, this is wrong to do around him. Etc. I cry a LOT FOR HOURS. I finally calm down for a few hours. I have an existenstial crisis about turning 30 and only having worked part time jobs and my mental health and having not ever lived. About finally feeling like I was coping enough to keep my emotions and house i order and now this. Im inconsolable for hours and cry till mt partner falls asleep. I dont sleep. I have intrusive thoughts. I feel suicidal for the firsy time in years. I consider going to the ER, second time i consider that recently. I take THC at 1030, hoping for a nap or at least relief for a few hours. BAD BAD BAD. When it kicks in, despite being the same dose i couldnt feel two weeks ago or was happy on yesterday I start.. hallucinating, I guess? Its all the symptoms of tripping on LSD. Letters on my keyboard mildly glow, words wiggle, afterimagea when I blink. I PANIC. THC ISNT MEANT TO DO THIS. I start to shake, like intense shivering, can barely type to my partner. He comes home from work for lunch. I worry that ive induced psychosis. we talk about the hospital. Im having paranoia now, that i've induced psychosis, that if I go in theyll put me on benzos, that im never going to be okay again. I cant eat. I feel like throwing up. My stomach is bad. Hours later I calm down. I feel fragile as glass. I keep crying on and off. Im actually stable enough by 10pm to enjoy playing some games with mt partner for the first time ina week. But I cry a lot. I apply here. I read a lot. Food tastes bad still. No appetite. Feel exhausted but wired. I take half a restavit. I spend hours writing this. I argue with my mum about whether to reinstate or whether ive made things too bad for that. Ive been awake 30 hours now. Im going to take another half a restavit. I know I shouldnt. I know how much I have done wrong. I know Ill be groggy till 4pm tomorrow. I know Im in a very bad place. The panic attacks are gone, I still get mild dizzyness on and off. I still get chills. But mostly my emotions are now a mess. I have never cried this much in my life. I feel like i have no control over my thoughts and emotions. I spiral and ruminate and feel depressed the last few days. My mum wants me to go to an inpatient hospital, or talk to the ER. I am afraid of being put on benzos by someone who doesnt understand. My boyfriend wants me to hold for two more weeks, since its changing so rapidly and i have new symptoms every day and ive passed the headaches and panic attacks. I am very scared. I dont know what to do. Taking two years to taper down and having to suffer withdrawals anyway sounds like hell. The risk of kindling and the fact I didnt feel better with the 2.5 or 5 the first week scares me so much. I dont know if im more afraid of living like this for much longer in the hope it will resolve, or of trying to go on meds and that kindling and being even WORSE, or of years of suffering when i might resolve in a few more weeks when i have already made it through almost four weeks of hell. I am scared though. And this week I am suffering. And I need advice. I know I wrote a lot. Im sorry. Ive been so scared and nobody around me understands and all want me to find help from a doctor and i am so afraid the doctors will make it worse. The THC sure did and the advice to not reinstate might have.
  4. Seroquel Abillify Wellbutrin Prozac Lexapro Zoloft Paxil Buspar Hydroxyzine Trazedone Cymbalta Lamictal Propanolol Oxcarbazepine Prazosin Xanax Celexa Amitriptylin Ambien Mirtazapine Hi, 33/F Ive been on all of the above medicines at some point or another from 2002 to recently. I have stopped them all with no withdrawl issues..... except for something very strange has happened recently. Is this withdrawl? Current Meds: Prilosec (GERD), Lasix (IIH) , Lisinopril (BP) I was taking zoloft a couple months ago, and a bit after i started that, i started mirtazapine. I had Covid around this time too. It was very mild. Biggest symptoms were being a mucus fountain, sore throat, a little bit muscle weirdness, and weird headaches, including headaches WHILE sleeping. a couple weeks later my situation changed, im in a much better, happier place (unrelated to meds), so i stopped zoloft. (I have been on zoloft before and had no withdrawl symptoms). Not long after that, i had a weird depersonalization with my hands. Now, i am a very scientific person, i do not act based upon emotions as much as i can... I have no body dysphoria. I was riding in a car on a day i was kind of tired, didnt sleep much (hard night of minecraft), and all of a sudden my hands felt like they weren't my hands. If I'm on my phone texting, my brain just goes "HEY WHY ARE THOSE FINGERS MOVING? THOSE ARENT MINE. WOW!" and my brain is amazed that they are moving every 10 seconds. It's the most disturbing thing Ive ever felt. I don't feel it if I can't see my hands, so for example, if I'm texting In the dark or at my PC. This feeling primarily happens when texting on my phone. Wearing fingerless gloves dampens the effect slightly. I've been really upset over it, and I feel my back and arms be really tense and sore, which is normal for when I'm upset . The only Injuries to happen recently was I was cut by my washing machine, and my cat scratched me. No numbness or tingling at that time. I've been going to therapy since 2003, and have only ever been diagnosed with anxiety and depression, so I am not insane. I have not gone through anything traumatic recently. If anything, I've been having a really good time this month, for the first time in years. Fearing it could be the mertazpine, i stopped it. about a week later, i started sweating profusely at night. drenched. No nightmares. no anxiety. just DRENCHED. a few days after i started to get drenched every night, i woke up SOAKING wet one day, my spine started feeling cold and numb and i had a panic attack. My muscles didnt work, it was as if i were drunk. my head was fuzzy and confused, and i stumbled BARELY into the bathtub. I managed to get into the bathtub, still clothed, and into hot water. I felt a little better, still confused. arms and spine still feel a bit weird,. I went to the ER for the first time in my life. They found nothing wrong. EKG, Chest Xray, Blood work, pee test, and they gave me an IV for hydration. while im glad its nothing seriously wrong (i guess), i am still freaked out by waking up drenched. I still get really upset being cold by being drenched. My arms and hands feel very twitchy. sometimes my legs. I had some mild tingly-ness in my fingertips for a couple days, but thats gone now. It feels the more days go on, the more twitchy i get, and IDK if its med withdrawl from mertazepine, since i only took it for a month. I LOVED the med. i slept really good and had AWESOME dreams.... I have an appt with my general dr on the 30th, but im afraid theyre going to tell me more of "we dont know whats wrong" Feeling twitchy and cold and fuzzy and panicy all the time is absolutely ruining this change in my life that is the happiest ive been in a long time. I am just -so scared-. Also for the record, i keep my house around 70F, so i dont get hot or cold due to environmental factors. I do not get hot or sweat while i am awake. I do not feel hot at night. I seem to feel a bit better as time goes on throughout the day, and im scared to sleep because i know im going to be drenched and panicing. The only thing that has seemed to have improved, is i dont know if i just got used to it or what, but when texting, i dont get a lot of the "My hands arent mine" feeling anymore. but my arms and hands still FEEL physically weird being twitchy. Im holding myself tight and having soreness in my shoulders... I am well aware that i should not be stopping meds cold turkey, but i have never had a problem before this, so i am curious if it could be the issue? Medicine withdrawl? tetanus from my washing machine? Cat scratch fever? Am i finally going crazy? I am scared. what do you all think?>
  5. Hello all, I have been browsing the site and thought i would now try introducing myself and asking the community here for any advice on next steps. About me - My name is Joe, i live in the UK just outside London. My mental health Journey started in February 2020, when i suffered Panic Attacks, followed by severe general anxiety and depression. I was initially given 40mg of Propranolol to help with the Panic Attack episodes. Then 50mg Sertraline for anxiety and depression. These medications helped me stabilize but not improve. i Also had 10 sessions of CBT, which included EMDR Therapy to help my deal with previous Trauma and to disassociate certain situations with Panic Attacks etc. After my dosage was increased twice up to 150mg with little to no effect, i was switched to 20mg of Citalopram in December 2020. I can honestly say Citalopram changed me for the better, i had almost no side effects. I gradually improved to a point where i was enjoying life again, my sex life improved to a point where it was better than i could remember. I had almost no re-occurrence of Panic like symptoms, plus my general anxiety and depression had improved dramatically. I even got Married while taking this mediation (Oct 2021). Previously i was petrified about my Anxiety ruining the day, but i had no problems on the day and couldn't believe how calm and collected i was. Now on to the issue - Because i felt so confident and was in such a good place, On December 1st i dropped to 10mg, and on 1st January i stopped altogether. I soon after experienced Post SSRI Sexual Dis-function (Premature Ejaculation, Loss of Libido and attraction) this quickly expanded to general emotional numbness. I felt disconnected from life, work and my Wife. i was still able to function correctly (go to work etc) but was not enjoying anything like i was before. Around 10 days ago, quickly and suddenly Anxiety/Panic symptoms stated again, i started obsessing about my breathing again (problem i had after my initial panic attacks). I have had to leave work multiple times, i feel overwhelmed and panicky when i feel either trapped or isolated (at work, stuck in traffic, in public). I experience chest pains and stiffness all over. I am also full of regret and negative thoughts, i feel scared and im obsessively worrying about this downward spiral and the impact its having on my health and my relationship with my Wife. I have gone from such a high, to a massive low. I'm seeing a psychiatrist next Tuesday. After much reading on here i feel like i have screwed myself over by trying to do something which i thought was good, stopping the medication!! My initial questions for anybody, although any input at all is appreciated - Given the fact that i tolerated Citalopram very well, Should i start taking it again? in the hope it will help like it did before, and then attempt to taper much much more slowly (my GP has already suggested starting a 10mg dose again). However i am concerned this may compound the problems of PSSD even further. - Any thoughts on whether this may be a relapse of symptoms or simply SSRI withdrawal? - Does anybody have experience with PSSD after stopping Citalopram, and how they dealt with this? Thank you all so much.
  6. Hi friends! Thankful to discover this forum. I’ve had a heck of a year and been through many SSRIs, SNRIs, benzos and betas. I had been on lexapro for about 7 months until recently when I just felt like I was laying in bed a lot and not motivated to do much. It had either stopped working or never really was. I was also on propanolol for a few mos with the lex and that helped a lot with extreme panic moments. When I talked to a psychiatrist last week she said I could stop taking lex and prop and switch to buspirone to try. I told her I wanted to at least taper the lex while trying buspirone. So I did that and was on it for a week at same dose and then she said do one week every other day. The first day I skipped my lex was a nightmare. Went to urgent care and they did negative flu and COVID tests because symptoms were so bad. They said they don’t know what to recommend for the meds but it’s likely withdrawal. Called my psychiatrist and she had me stop the lexapro and buspirone and start effexor and hydroxyzine. So I started effexor at 37.5 7 days ago with hydroxyzine 3x daily. It was fine until this week (1 week later) when she recommended Increasing to 75mg effexor. It was Awful and I suffered all day. Tried to get a hold of psych and she didn’t call back didn’t call back and then this morning I just took 37.5 mg because that was the lower dose and i wasn’t about to double it again. Her staff finally called back and said I could just stop effexor. When I asked what I should do next or if I should just lower back down to the dose I started with they had to ask and call back. So then they called back and said I could go back to the lower dose. So today I’ve heard two different things. I can stop taking it or I can go back to lower dose. I just want to be off. It’s only been a week but I’m over it. I’ve tried too much and my body just isn’t handling it. Do I need to taper having only been on the lowest dose for a week? I have a video call with her on Monday but I don’t want to just “stick it out” on the low dose til then if I’m planning on getting off of it Monday anyways. I’m going to suggest starting propanolol again by itself. I just don’t know what to do at this point with the effexor.
  7. Quilter1011

    Quilter1011

    Hello all! I'm popping over from the Lyrica Survivors group on FB, that's taking a bit of a pause. I am happy to report that I'm almost finished getting off 4 meds over the course of about 4 yrs! Lyrica is my last one and I should be done next week after a 14 mth long taper. Before that, it took me about 18 mths to taper off a benzo. And before that, I came off Gabapentin and Flexeril. It's been such a long road with all the ups and downs of withdrawal symptoms. It's been a very emotional journey. I will work on my signature but need to figure out all the dates. Thanks for the inclusion.
  8. Hello I will give a brief summary of what has happened after taking most recent drugs. I am a 21 yr old college student, low-income and person of color who recently had to drop their studies (September) due to what I think is OCD and quit their job (November) due to never before experienced debilitating and frightening symptoms. These began after stopping Luvox 50 mg and Prozac 20 mg. I have never been warned or informed or properly tapered off any psychotropic drug by any psychiatrists I have seen including the one (due to insurance I can only speak with him once a month) who prescribed me the last four recent drugs. I was unfortunately very naive in my decisions surrounding these drugs. For clarity: I was being treated for "depression" and anxiety. Started at age 17. My signature is copied off records of prescription dates. For the most part I did not take pills regularly, I remember last year organizing my room and seeing that I had bottles full of pills I never took. A lot of prescriptions were what the psychiatrists called trial and error, so I was trying pills to see their effects which were miss which made me realize they were making me sick so I stopped. I unfortunately cannot remember which ones I did take consistently prior to this year (2021). Up until summer I was taking propranolol as needed for anxiety/stress (it had been I think ~1 yr more or less since I had taken any drug). During the summer I needed and wanted guidance to cope with anxiety/stress in the form of therapy. Through my insurance I emailed and left calls for many people but did not get responses and was getting discouraged. I was so desperate for relief that I was prescribed buspirone 10 mg, which did initially provide a calming relief. In the beginning of September 2021, I was overwhelmed with work and inability to properly cope with my internal problems which was taking a toll on my studies. *Here is where details become very blurry. I let the current psychiatrist know and he prescribed me Fluvoxamine 50 mg. The first two times I took it in the evening and found that it made me restless, it did not let me sleep. So I switched to taking it in the mornings and cut it in half; it still made me restless and I would be very sleepy during the day. I let the psychiatrist know and he told me to switch to Prozac 20 mg. I took it once it the morning before work and the restlessness was awful, I could not sleep at all. Note: I do remember taking advil pm and even buspirone alongside the fluvoxamine at the same time to abate the restlessness. I ceased all medications and after that and since then I have been experiencing things I have never experienced before. -acute short-term memory loss and other gaps in memory* -frightening confusion* -cognitive problems* -weird thinking and feelings I do not know the words to describe* -vision problems (after-image, visual snow/static, visual distortion, stars in vision)* -loss of personality and identity* -head ache/pain/pressure mostly* (this has been consistent, I remember waking up one day before work in October to a sharp pain only in the right side of my head, then afterwards feeling pressure localized around only the right side of my head/eye, and now a bit of the top of my head) -slipping in and out of consciousness when closing my eyes* -dpdr* -auditory problems (cannot focus on what I'm listening)* -feeling stuck in my head* -intrusive thoughts like never before* -hypnagogia -disorientation -delirium -coordination and balance problems -fear and dread -lack of motivation -bizzare dreams -heart/chest pain -dreadful anxiety for no reason -severe depression/anhedonia (I have never in my life experienced actual depression)* -crying so much There are more but I cannot remember right now. The ones with asterisks are the most concerning for me. Everything came on so suddenly and abruptly and unprecedentedly. I am so afraid that I am developing a more serious mental illness and that I will have to take more drugs which I do not want. I have no support system, my family is busy and other people I know are as well. The psychiatrist doesn't think the drugs did anything. With what strength I have, I was able to schedule a neurologist appointment and will be getting studies done. I feel that I am wasting their time. I think deep down I want this to be something physical that can be cured. Which I know is wishful and doesn't serve me good. I am trying my best to not let my fear get to me but I am constantly reminded of my decisions. I am beyond heartbroken, this is not who I am. I am a spirited and passionate person, I do not know what to do as I wait for answers.
  9. I’m new to the site and looking for some guidance and insight into my taper. I started taking fluoxetine in July of 2018 for depression and anxiety. I started at 10mg a day and over a 6 month period worked up to 40mg. Over the course of the pandemic i continued to up my dosage until I got to 80mg a day in January of 2021. I also take propranolol as a migraine preventative 10mg twice a day and as needed for anxiety/panic attacks which is usually once a week. And I take dextroamphetamine XR as needed for focus, but I avoid it if I feel my anxiety is kicking back in. Sometimes I’ll take it for 4 days in a row and sometimes I won’t take it for a month. I also cut caffeine out of my diet. I’ve been in therapy since February and have developed a bunch of good coping mechanisms and lifestyle changes that made me feel like I could try going off of the SSRI’s. I’ve been going down 10mg each week since mid July, but after reading a few posts I’m wondering if that’s too fast. I’m currently down to 30mg a day. Some days are totally fine and I feel really good about the taper and some days I wake up in a totally nebulous depression. I’m currently in a sort of an emotional haze. I can’t really say I’m depressed about anything in particular which is typical of my depression. I just stop caring. Unfortunately one of my coping mechanisms for depression in the past has been to self medicate with alcohol and I feel myself slipping back into that. I’ve been so up and down though the last few weeks I don’t know if maybe this current feeling of apathy will fade away tomorrow. Right now I feel like I could just stare at a wall all day or sleep for a week. Thanks for reading.
  10. Hi, my name is Brianna. I’m 24 years old and a mom of 3. I have always suffered with anxiety. For many years I treated my anxiety with marijuana and that seemed to work although I would still have anxiety in certain situations. Mid/late last year I got fed up with the outside judgment of being a mother that smokes & being told I should be on medication so that’s what I did. A “holistic doctor” prescribed me Effexor 37.5 for a week then up to 75 and I think I got to 100 and something mg. Then I started to feel terrible! So I decided to stop taking them, (big mistake, I know but I was new & naive) I went 3 days without anything and then reinstated at 37.5 after having unbearable withdrawals. It took me over 2 months to become stable on 37.5. During those 2 months i was put on hydroxyzine at night to help me sleep & I was diagnosed with hyperthyroidism and put on Methimozole as well as propranolol (beta blocker) to help with the hyperthyroid symptoms. Eventually I stabled out and joined the Effexor support group on facebook. That’s when I realized I needed to get off Effexor safely and slowly. I then did my first 10% taper. It messed me up for 2 weeks. Symptoms included- constipation, diarrhea, loss of appetite, nausea, racing heart, muscle tremors, anxiety, etc.. It was awful and I was advised by the support group to try to taper less next time after I stable out since 10% may be too much for me. But here I am about 4/5 months later and having those same withdrawal symptoms again and I have NOT done another taper. Some people have called it tolerance withdrawal, others have said it could be from my other medications I’m taking. 4 days ago I started magnesium glycinate supplements, & last night I added a omega 3 to that before bed. I’m not sure if the supplements are helping at all yet but I’m just looking for some kind of relief. That’s when I was advised to come here and for advice. I don’t know what to do and I’m extremely overwhelmed by all this. I’m praying somebody here can help me pin point the cause of my issues.
  11. Hi all, I am searching for information/experiences relating to propanolol and weaning off of it. I have a diagnosis of chronic/intractable miraine and propanolol is a first line treatment even though it's off labeI. 'm currently a year into a regular Botox regimen and my head has been a lot better. So at my last neurologist appointment I decided to try to wean off of propanolol since it is notorious for weight gain and fatigue and I struggle with both. Of course the doctor's taper was pretty rapid- basically a 50% reduction every week then jumping off at 20 mg BID (I was at 80mg BID for a year.) I was doing great until I got down to 20 mg BID. Suddenly, I was hit with a ton of physical anxiety, insomnia, racing heart and a deep sense of depression all at once. I started sleeping 2-3 hours a night. After a week of this I reluctantly went back up to 40mg BID 4 days ago and now I feel completely normal again. I'm fully aware of the problems with rapid tapering ADs and other psych drugs but I didn't realize a beta blocker could be problematic to wean off of. I'd really love to get some more info on propanolol (beyond the basic info on drugs.com) Especially in terms of psychological side effects, sleep, and of course taperin it. Has anyone else had difficulty weaning off- both physically and mentally? I read some of the thread about tapering Beta blockers and it says they require a 10% rate like psych drugs.Why is this? PS I had a p-drug history relating to pregnancy and post partum. It was all a big mess and I am not able to tolerate most psychoactive drugs, which I learned the hard way. My zoloft withdrawal story came to a close a few years ago and I've completely moved on and made a full recovery. My goal is to be able to quit the propanolol and later the gabapentin and just rely on Botox. I've had migaines for years, they went chronic in 2016.
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