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  1. I have been on 3 mg of Risperdal for 13 years due to drug induced psychosis for meth. I decided to finally try to get off the med and have been tapering since December. I did 0.25 mg per month for 4 months but when I hit 2 mg insomnia kicked in for a couple weeks so I waited it out for 2 months and this time went down 0.10 mg for this month. It has been 5 weeks since my last taper and my only real symptoms are fatigue, feeling completely brain dead, and occasionally my vision feels all strange kind of like a very mild acid trip. I am sleeping 9 hours a night and everything is calm I just feel completely flat emotionally, brain dead, and tired for the most part. Would it be better to continue the taper or just hold since my symptoms aren't unbearable but they are just frustrating?
  2. Hi! English is not my first language so I apologize if my texts are confusing, same with my signature. I quit the last 5 mg escitalopram/cipralex 3 weeks ago. When I went down from 10 to 5 mg nothing got better so I started reading about tardive dysphoria which made me very eager to quit my medication completely. I also found out about 6 months ago that quitting 5 mg at a time is way too drastic for someone who has been using the medication for years, but I figured i'd just endure this last time. The problem is that I've now found out from reading on this site and on other places that some of the side effects might become permanent. So my question now is, should I go back up to 5-4 mg, and then slowly go down 1 mg at a time from there? Or should I just wait this out when it has already been 3 weeks. I'm willing to wait it out if it gets better. But if there are big risks about doing what i'm doing right now i'm gonna go back up if that's your advice. Ps: I do feel horrible physically and mentally and can practically not be around people, but as I said i'm willing to endure it if it gets better. I can't trust my doctors anymore, they want to make me go back up to max dosage with both voxra and cipralex + start giving me more benzo for no good reason. Which is why I'm asking here, the people here seem to have good knowledge about this. TL;DR: Go back up to 5 mg and go down 1 mg at a time or endure this and wait for it to get better?
  3. MOD NOTE : Toulouse's Introduction Topic is here --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Hello all. I wanted to come here to give my success story. If you go through my first thread called My Paxil Withdrawal Journey, you can see for yourself the misery and pain that I went through, particularly the first 2 years of getting off of Paxil. I had so many symptoms, ones I've never had before. The main issues I had coming off were anxiety and insomnia. I've had dizziness, tinnitus, heart palpitations, intolerance to alcohol, and a new allergy which almost killed me. I used to feel like my brain was 'slipping' out of my skull. It was a strange feeling. and scary too. Numbness in my fingers, hands, legs. Twitching muscles, twitching hands( I thought I had ALS). I thought I was dying. To make things worse I saw a holistic doc who said I had mold illness and put me on these crazy pills and skyrocketed my anxiety and paranoia about mold (it's everywhere btw), it turned out to be false, and I tried to sue the guy, but I wouldn't have made enough to make the lawyer fees worth it. After that, I slowly focused on my own recovery again, trying to be as healthy as I could. I had many windows and waves. Slowly, the windows became bigger and longer. I slowly started feeling like I had a handle on it. Then I'd have a few months of very rough anxiety and panic and insomnia and nearly got back on something. I almost did. But I decided to try to be patient and gave it a few more weeks. I'm glad I did, otherwise, I might have gotten back on another SSRI and still be on it now. But notably, things that helped me were mindfulness meditation and talk therapy. That really helped calm my brain. Now I don't meditate anymore since I don't have anxiety, except for when it's appropriate maybe. I started working out again after that 3 year mark. I started just walking, then I joined the gym and started lifting weights. The old guys were stronger than me, I had grown so weak. But gradually I started getting stronger again, and lifting heavier, doing treadmill work, etc. And eating pretty healthy for the most part (though I still like my cookies and snacks). I'd say after year 3 I was 80-90% recovered. I mean, feeling like my pre-Paxil days. I say today I am 99% recovered. I think there are some residual things, like I still get some ringing in my ears sometimes. I still have an intolerance to alcohol, and the new allergies (but admit, those body changes will likely never go away at this point). but I'm okay with that. Now I cycle almost every day, I go for long rides. I never think of my anxiety, or the pain I went through anymore. It's a distant memory for me and I'm so glad to be here today and able to share my story. Thank you to the moderators for running this site. It was the most helpful tool in my journey out of this nightmare. I wish everyone here the same success I've had, or better, as my journey was pretty brutal for a while there. Peace and love to you all. Toulouse
  4. Darwin's Success Story Before i begin i'd like to introduce myself. My names Darwin I'm a really easy person to talk to;very sociable when not in a withdrawal induced mind, open minded about various topics,I'm a dancer,and I love learning new things. Early 2013 I began experiencing very obsessive thoughts about small small things. at the time i didn't understand where this was coming from so with the intuition i had then i took action on trying my best at solving these "things" but it eventually led to more anxiety and despair. My mom took notice of this because i was skipping school and having trouble coping with my symptoms. One thing led to another and i was prescribed prozac in which initially i DID NOT want to be prescribed for because i did not like the fact that i had to take meds it made me feel sick and un-normal. I was eventually pushed to try it and take it because of my physician and parents; I was very naive about the causes of antidepressants at the time not one bit did i try to question it. Prozac did not help with my symptoms but only numbed me to the point of personality loss. I Should mention that during this time period i had weekly use of marijuana from peers which may or may not have triggered my sickness. Diet could have played a role also. Summer 2013-Summer 2014 I started to take Lexapro it had the same effects as prozac only this time not so much more profound(maybe due to dependency from prozac) I continued use into my second year of highschool in which i struggled very badly through relationships and academics. I even remember one time in class where i sat beside a female that i had attraction for tell me that my handwriting looked like i was struggling to write!. I was having thoughts of suicide in the school area. it was terrible my anxiety was past 100. I had lots of my sexual experiences during the beginning of 2014 but felt as if there was a missing touch/connection with the person. It then led to separating but because of the mood numbing during that time i had no feelings toward my partner and i separating. I failed with relationships countless of times during this time period with females, acquaintances,friends and family. September 2014 At this time i was prescribed Zoloft and vyvanse for Focus. i had a terrible time during the first 2 weeks but then i suddenly felt a little bit brighter as the weeks would progress the 75-90% of my OCD and depression disappeared for quite some time. October/winter 2014- early 2015 I began experimenting with LSD commonly known as acid. I would say that my first experience was what opened me to many many things. I went from being an overly pessimistic person to optimistic within one week. I also began taking more of a spiritual approach with my sickness and was more and more interested with knowledge and learning new things from day to day. I noticed that taking that Lsd with the zoloft really alleviated that remaining 10% of OCD. I also found that meditating for at least 20mins a day helped me become more mindful and less obsessive. I had this going for about 2 months until i met with my psychiatrist in December in which she upped my dosage of vyvanse which did not work i became very fatigue compared to my original energetic self within one day of usage. During the appointment I had spoken with her and wanted off the zoloft in which she declined because of the thought of me still being sick. Her being the doctor my parents agreed. Still at this time i was still ill informed about the whole psychiatry thing.I eventually Quit with my psychiatrist and therapist i was with because i felt that everything they had been telling me were all lies and not genuine.. We would waste time during our appointment together about USELESS things to pass the time it was LUDICROUS. I had a time where my therapist tried to brainwash me with TOXIC chemicals in LSD when it has been proven through science that it's completely neurotoxic! February 2015 I met a new psychiatrist that prescribed me Effexor and olanzapine i took for 2 weeks then stupidly went C/T because of increasing knowledge on A/D I knew it wasn't correct to go C/T but i was confident in myself not thinking about my past use on anti depressants i thought symptoms where going to dissipate with one month. but it didn't i then took half of what i took before and instantly felt better. the very next morning my mom gave me zoloft 100mg with her worried self which led me to become REALLY irritable with strange head pressure and became violent started punching walls. My parents called 911 where officers came to my home where i spoke to them about my reaction with this drug. I was put into the ER for basically the whole day and transferred to a behavioral center. April 2015 At the behavioral center i basically became a guinea pig to my psychiatrist switching from effexor,zoloft,wellbutrin,olanzapine, within 4 days. my first day was actually fine was hopeful that i'd benefit from the place. Until the drugs started catching up to me and i experienced immediate withdrawal. I was on zoloft 50mg most of the time. i had very little energy but big appetite from the olanzapine. i was constipated and had brain fog it was really bad.Although i did meet some interesting people, i was upset because i wasn't myself!! i felt as if i was the only person experiencing this at the ward because everybody else there was already drugged up or where beginning to be drugged. I continued with zoloft 50mg for 2 weeks then reducing to 25 the next two weeks. I was too afraid to continue the drugs and i was too messed up at the time to try and do a slow taper i felt that i would struggle even more!. At this time i didn't know what i was withdrawing from anymore the effexor,vyvanse or zoloft so i decided to completely get off all drugs since summer was about to begin within a month. May-July 2015 Since then I have failed basically half that school year attending approx 4-5 months within the 9month. I was at a good school too.. with college courses in high school for free; very unfortunate. My intelligence/EQ has severely dropped. I was opted out of school due to feeling of being violent to myself/others from Zoloft and mood swings. All the things you can expect from A/D withdrawal. Thank you for Reading.
  5. MOD NOTE : Toulouse's Success Story is here ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Hello everyone, I am a first time poster, long time Paxil user. I have been on Paxil for about 12 years or so, prescribed by my doctor to combat anxiety. My anxiety was never severe, I just fell down the slippery slope of Paxil use after what should have just been a bump in the emotional road for me. Long story short, I've decided to taper off of the Paxil 20mg (down from 40mg a couple years prior). This year my doc advised me to cut from 20mg to 10mg. (I know now, way too much and too fast). I had brain zaps, irritablilty, and vivid dreams (which I actually don't mind since they are usually pleasant) and some dizziness. After a few weeks I was feeling OK enough to go from 10mg to 5mg. I was good for about 3 weeks. But the next two weeks I suffered from severe anxiety - unlike any kind of despairing feeling I've ever had in my life! I suddenly became an emotional wreck and was just at wits end. So I went from 5mg Paxil back up to 10mg. A week or so later - hives. Hives, - small ones, on my neck or forearms. They'd go away after a couple hours so I didn't put too much worry into it. Then a week after these small hive appearances, I had a really bad outbreak of hives on my legs, which I thought was just a heat rash. I didn't take an anti-histamine, I hate the way they make me feel. Big mistake. I ended up waking up at 4 in the morning, itching terribly all over my body. I was searching for Benadryl downstairs when my wife found me - at which point I was getting dizzy and nauseous. I was going into anaphylactic shock. My wife and I both thought I was dying, my children sobbing as they waited by the front door for the ambulance to arrive. I've never had allergies really. I am allergic to cats, it turns out, but I've had my cat for 3 years (a Persian which I found to not feel allergic reactions to in the past- and who has since been living with my brother till this all gets ironed out). So this anaphylaxis was not something I was prepared for. An amulance ride later, they told me I had some kind of allergic reaction. A few weeks later, after seeing an allergist, he suspected my bizarre reaction to be caused by a medicine (not a food or other allergen). I only take Paxil, and Propecia. (which I've stopped last week to try to rule that out as a cause of the hives). I still get small areas of redness on my skin, primarily when I wake up in the AM. And for now I'm on antihistimines, which I dislike greatly. I am wondering if the traumatic, despair-like anxiety feelings I suffered, and then yo-yo-ing back to a higher dosage of Paxil did a number on my body and made me overly sensitive to histamines, or my cat. Since my allergist suspected Paxil as a possible cause of the hives/anaphylaxis, I have since tapered back down to 5mg, and three days ago down to 2.5mg. I suspect its not the actual Paxil causing the hives, but the withdrawal itself, the toll it takes on my body and mind. Just hoping putting my story out there, if anyone can relate to such a physical reaction like what I experienced, and if they too, think it is related to the Paxil withdrawl. Thanks for reading. Cheers
  6. Hi All I was a member of Paxilprogress.org several years ago; that site and its wonderful members helped me wean off Paxil in 2009 and I remained a member until the site closed. I have since been managing my anxiety disorder through regular therapy and using CBT tools. I view anxiety and depression as a chronic condition like diabetes; it can't necessarily be "cured" but it can be successfully managed. I've had my ups and downs over the years but I have to say I've had a great life. This past September, my wife and I retired early and decided to move from California to Portugal for a few years so we can explore Europe while we're healthy enough to get around. It's a beautiful country and the people are very gracious, but I do find my anxiety has increased due to cultural changes. I'm hoping to join a group similar to Paxilprogress where I can share my story, lend some support, and just spend some time with folks who understand what its like to live with anxiety. Thanks!
  7. Hi all, I'm looking for some assistance in getting off of Citalpram. Here's my story: I have been on an SSRI for 10+ years. Started Zoloft to deal with panic attacks brought on by a stressful boss and marijuana use. The zoloft helped with panic attacks, and then helped me get through two pregnancies (one with postpartum depression) but in the last year or so the side effects have outweighed the benefits. I have felt pretty emotionally numb, gained weight, had no libido and had a sweating problem, all attributed to the antidepressant. My doctor suggested that I switch from Zoloft to Citalopram in the last year or two, and I tried that. I didn't see much difference in side effects, in fact, I almost feel like they got worse. I also went on Welbutrin to see if that would curb the sexual side effects. It did, but very little. I could not get up to a therapeutic dose of Welbutrin because I got so angry when I took 300 mg I thought I was going to kill my children. Anyway, I was on like 150 mg Welbutrin and 20 mg Citalopram until a month or so ago, when I started trying to wean from the Citalopram. I took my GPs advice and went from 20 mg t0 10 mg, waited several weeks, then to 5, waited a couple weeks, then to 5 every other day, and pretty quickly after that stopped taking the Citalopram this last week. I had another mom say something like "2.5 mg, that's nothing! You shouldn't even be on it anymore!" and of course I felt embarrassed and decided she was probably right, so I took myself off of it altogether. I had horrible withdrawal symptoms last week. It began with just the brain shocks, but progressed to severe irritability, and emotional sensitivity and instability, and then by this weekend I was yelling at my 4 and 6 year old (of course my husband was out of town on business) for no real reason, and feeling like physically abusing them. This isn't normal behavior for me. I'm normally a mom who is wound pretty tight, but I have patience reserves - and by this Friday they were GONE. I felt like the worst person/mom in the world for screaming at them and getting physically aggressive. I felt completely out of control emotionally. One minute I was screaming and the next I was sobbing. So I made the hard decision to not "tough it out" anymore, and went back on 5 mg of Citalopram a day for the last two days to try and get rid of some of the symptoms. I am trying to get help in weaning the rest of the way off. I've been reading a lot of James Heaney's site, and feeling like weaning 10% a month might be the safest route since I seem so sensitive to the loss of serotonin in my body. I asked my GP today to prescribe Citalopram in a liquid form so I could do this, and she didn't really "hear" me the first time I asked. She sent back a recommendation that I continue on 5 mg every other day for a month, then go down to taking 5 mg for 3 days a week, give it a couple weeks, then go down to 2 days a week of 5 mg, give it two weeks, then go down to 1 day a week of 5 mg, and then give it two weeks, and then take none. I'm concerned about her schedule because I had been reading that it probably wasn't the best idea to skip doses...does anyone know if this is accurate? And I'm wondering if anyone else has had the liquid Citalopram prescribed to them? Does this seem to be a good plan going forward? Do I need to talk to a psychiatrist? I don't feel like I trust my GP to know what's best for my body anymore. She said today that I seem to be more sensitive to this than others. It pissed me off. I see a lot of people online who are having trouble coming off antidepressants, and I don't understand why she doesn't recognize this. Anyway, thanks for any advice. P.S. I also went off the Welbutrin this last week. It doesn't seem to have had any affect one way or another. But who knows, maybe it's wrapped up in this too.
  8. I’m new to this website/forum, but I’ve been researching and finding great information about people getting off their psychiatric medication. I’m 46, and I was 20 years old in college when I experienced my first full blown panic attack (official diagnosis, panic disorder without agoraphobia, generalized anxiety disorder, depression). Looking back (after lots of therapy), I can now understand the stress I was under at that time. But the main point is that I was put on zoloft and lorazepam which, combined with lots of “social drinking” seemed to put a lockdown on the panic attacks (though I would still wake up with some varying degrees of anxiety most mornings). I put my head down and just sort of pushed my way through life, graduating from college with honors, holding a job doing community education / organizing / speaking, shifting gears and going back to school, and then starting my own successful business. Jump to about 4 years ago, 2012 and things just seemed to begin falling apart. The successful company I had created was now failing, a relationship I actually felt invested in was failing, and the hangovers from drinking had become really intense. In short, I ran out of steam. I gave up drinking in the spring of 2014, and that summer decided I was going to get off the damn meds. I did it the “right way,” tapering off the benzos first, and then the SSRI. And though the anxiety would increase while tapering and it was tough, by the end of the summer (early September) I was actually med free! Unfortunately, mid-October the panic attacks returned full force. Again, I can see now that this was a particularly stressful period of my life, but of course I was really disappointed when I decided I just had to get back on the meds (the panic attacks were relentless and excruciating). The problem was that the meds no longer seemed to work like they did before. And now I’m on MORE meds (add in remeron and extra 50 mg of zoloft). I have made some changes, doing lots of therapy, ACA support groups (and looking at childhood issues generally), exercising again regularly, EMDR, meditation, etc. And I want OFF the meds! I know I need to do this slowly, and at this point, I cut the remeron from 15 mg to 7.5 (about 1.5 months ago) and I’ve cut the benzo (now clonazepam) from 2 mg to 1.5 per day (just started that 3 days ago). My thought is to cut the benzos first, then the last of the remeron. I know with the relatively long half-life of the clonazepam, I need to take it slowly. I’m thinking .5 mg every 2 weeks. From the information I've come across, it seems like some taper off even more slowly than that? I'm looking for others to share their experiences with their own clonazepam withdrawal schedules (for panic disorder, preferably). I just don’t know what to do about the SSRI (zoloft). I realize this website is about benzo withdrawal, but I’m hoping to find others with experience on panic disorder and SSRI withdrawal too (as well as benzo withdrawal support). I hope this is OK on this forum? I’ve been “working with the anxiety” (trying to “make friends” with it as they say in the meditation circles). I know I’m less scared of it now, but I'm also not experiencing the full blown panic attacks. My concern is that I would get off everything (including the SSRI/zoloft) and then the panic attacks return, and it takes SO LONG for the SSRI to build up in one’s system. Do I just prepare myself to weather that storm? Will that storm really pass eventually without the meds? After years of trying to make my physiology match the lifestyle I felt I should lead, I’m now accepting the idea that I need to make my lifestyle match my physiology. The panic attacks are just so damn awful when they hit relentlessly all day long, day after day. I’m scared. Is there anyone out there that has had any experience with the meds and panic attacks along the lines that I have had? Are there other resources out there I should know about? Is it really possible that I can live a purposeful (and perhaps at least semi-peaceful) life without meds after 25 years of being on them? Much gratitude . . .
  9. hello everyone, I am a former member of paxilprogress, i went by the username of no_fear if i can remember. I was on paxil for 5 years and 4 months, starting off on 20mg, but for the most part on 10mg, i tapered down to 5mg/day then 5mg/every other day, then stopped, this was back in winter 08/09. to be honest the tapering part for me wasn't too bad, the real problems started after i stopped, probably about 2 months after. i was hit with depression and anxiety, after that came the brain zaps and dizziness (i felt like i was going to fall backwards all the time) that lasted for a good 6 months. i have had bouts of insomnia and moments lying in bed feeling so low and fatigued i would of asked God to end my life right there. it took me a good 4 years after stopping to get to a place and head space to feel what i could consider normal, i have been off paxil for over 7 years now and have never looked back. i currently do have health issues which are possibly related directly or indirectly to coming off paxil, but i feel it is more to do with my clean but not very nutritious diet and not letting myself recover properly. i feel bad typing this because i can see many of you are still in withdrawal and i think this site is more to do with that, but i just wanted to share my story and let people know there is light at the end of the tunnel.
  10. Introduction topic: ☼-mranxious-3-months-off-effexor-xr-6-years-on Heyyyyyy 😊 I am alive !!!!!! Out there living a life that I am proud of and comfortable with. Pheww I am one of the blessed ones to have breached the other side and lived to talk about and YOU WILL TOO !! That was one hell of a ride. One that is FAR FAR FAR in the rearview mirror 🙃 If you have read my story, you will know that I went through literally the most traumatic event in my life and that was "Effexor Withdrawal". From start to finish I was unsure I would make it through this time, but here I am and let me tell you "Its a process". This will not happen overnight...BUT if you make the right moves, eat healthy and take your vitamins, time will heal, only time BUT everything you do in the mean time will make the difference in the end. Here is what I did : -Increased Omega 3:6:9 daily -Lots of purified water -Maximize sleep if you can and set a goof environment to be able to sleep(No sleeping drugs) -eliminated processed foods and to a whole food plant based lifestyle(THE BIGGEST GAME CHANGER for me and healer I believe* -Cut out all toxic people -light walks/bikes/swims daily(Key word "light". -meditation- daily(Prayer as well daily) -Church -daily mantras "I will heal" "I will get better" "I am getting better" -Reading books, occupying my time -Multivitamin and mineral support tablet I went from being a very anxious person once off Effexor for months and months of withdrawal , to now years later, a fully functional human being again 😎 I fully believe that in order to fully heal, you need to be fully off any pharmatheuticals (Per doctors orders of course, my disclosure) ughh 😋 Oh yes and find a good doctor that will listen to you and meet your needs "YOUR NEEDS". I have found a wonderful doctor and he is all about my plant life and healing and he is all about me living my best life drug free. Whatever you are going through right now, just know it gets so much better. It can takes months to years to recover. Realize this is your journey and a special one. Myself personally believes that god has transformed my old life into my new life and I can't be ever more thankful and grateful. One hell of a adventure but "hey" I love who I am more now and have grown exponentially since this ordeal. I have days where I cry happy tears over the smallest things, butterfly on a flower, old person smiling, to the breeze blowing off the lake , to the food on my plate. I never appreciated it before Effexor and I took it for granted, now it just happens and i love it 😊 I guess it all depends how you look at it, but when things get grim and they will, come back here, read my story and just know you are all in good hands😊 The effort you put out now in the throws of this awful withdrawal, will eventually become the reward you see in your future !!!!! YOU ARE GOING TO RECOVER MY FRIENDS, ALL OF YOU !!!! STAY CALM AND SOLDIER ON, stay safe and always consult your doctor before making any moves and if they don't listen to you : FIND A NEW ONE !!!! But always stay in close touch with them please 😎 This website has been a game changer and so are all the admins* Beautiful hard working volunteers 🧡💛💚💜💖 *Taper, taper, taper your mediction , this is most important, don't rush a taper just because you start feeling good. It will catch up to you, stay the course 😎 or possibly suffer grave setbacks * *Feel free to message me* MR. A
  11. Hello everyone! I'm a 23 year old male from Finland My story pretty much goes like this. Got really depressed when I was around 17-18, which led me to see a doctor. They made me see a doctor and I scored really high points on their "depression test". At around 18 years old I was quite suicidal. I was almost instantly put on 20 mg of citalopram and with 3-4 months I was doing a lot better. Fast forward 5 years and I have eaten the same medication for around 4 years now (had some breaks when I tried to quit). I think I ate 20 mg for around 2.5 years and 10mg for around 1.5 years. Troughout these years my depression has become a better, however I've had periods in my life where it got quite bad. Right now I'm studying at a business school and around 8 months ago I really decided that it's the right time to get off the meds. I quit my 10mg citalopram cold turkey, which in hindsight wasn't a good idea and I don't reccomend it to anyone. I got really bored of living in a somewhat medicated state of mind and really just wanted to feel like a normal human being. During these 8 months of withdrawal the first 2 months were filled with the basic withdrawal symptoms that almost everyone has. Month 2-5 was a time period where I felt a lot of anxiety and since around month 5-6 to now I've been in a state where I find it hard to get enjoyment out of life. I think it's called anhedonia or something. And also my emotions haven't come back and I feel a little bit weird still. It's also worth pointing out that both of my previous relationships have ended, while I was in wd, which I completely understand now. So I just pretty much briefly explained my situation atm and I've been thinking of doing this for weeks now. The reason is that after getting over my darkest depression I've been left with a feeling of wanting to help other people going trough the same thing. I created this account in order to show everyone else my progess, what I'm doing, to be able to give advice and to motivate others. Right now I'm in a quite sh*tty situation, where my relationship of 1.5 years is going quite ****, I don't feel that much emotions and I feel a little bit depressed sometimes. I will show you how to get trough this!
  12. Success story: trying-to-havehope-off-latuda-october-2015 Hello everyone. First off I want to say that I know this site is largely about antidepressants and my latest experience is about an antipsychotic but I could really use the support, guidance and insight that you might have. I'm going to try to make this as cLear and short at possible. I've always had depression and I've been on and off antidepressants since I was a teenager. The side effects not being worth the lil they did for me was always why I got off. Well I hadn't been on for 4 years and I just got tired of my depression again. I have ptsd and am in therapy and I thought it would help with the stuff it was kicking up. I have pcos and I told my psychiatrist that I had mood swings. And I should also note that I went to see him the year before and he prescribed me lamictal but I got so scared by the side effects I didn't take it. A year later around the same time (winter/spring when my depression gets worse) I went and he diagnosed me as bipolar still and gave me Latuda. I took the Latuda for 5 months. I wanted to get off of it cause I really couldn't cry on it and I felt so blah about everything. Seemed hard to get interested in anything. Well ironically the day I talked to my pdoc about it...with him obviously not supporting me getting off cause he told me I won't live a quality life without meds...I had some anxiety that was triggered by something but it was electrified. I had never experienced anxiety like this. I was so scared. That weekend I had mood swings and horrible anxiety and I started the taper. I was on 60mg of it. He originally told me if I wanted to come off just go down half for a week and stop. WRONNGGGG. This was the beginning of the most horrible time in my life. This happened at the end of august. What happened going off this med...first the horrible electrified anxiety and mood swings. Then...the depression. I have had depression my whole life. This depression has been worse than anything I thought was humanly possible. The mood swings. I don't understand how going off a med could do that. My perception has been off which I can't really explain. I have had nightmares. It seems like this med distorted my memories (can it even ******* do that???). I'm so scared all the time which I guess is anxiety. My concentration is horrible. I'm obsessive. OH YEA. I completely lost my appetite with the anxiety and lost 30 pounds in 2 and a half months... I have been wondering if I will be forced to go back on meds. How could I manage (hard but was still doable) without meds for 4 years and have this experience and feel so ready to end my life. Between him telling me I can't have a quality life on meds and reading so many experiences of people on meds....it's like what's the point? Will I ever be able to go back to my old depressed self? I used to be able to binge watch tv and enjoy food at least. Will that happen again? I know no one can really anwser these questions right. I have lost so much hope. I don't know if I'm coming or going. I feel like I've been traumatized by this experience. I don't mean to sound dramatic but I really do. How can a med randomly do that and the taper cause all this? I feel like it attacked me. And I am obsessed with researching things online which makes things worse. Can you live well without meds with depression? Also, how do you stop hating yourself for going on meds? I keep thinking please turn back the time. Please god. Why did I do this to me? I knew meds sucked. Why would I think this time they would help? How could I be so niave. Now I'm stuck. Oh and by the way. I ended up going to 40mg for 2 weeks then 1 week 20. Probably still too fast but the med was causing so much **** and I thought I would get immediately better off. It's been 2 months being off and I'm still off. My sleep is now normal. The electrified anxiety is gone but now I'm scared a lot with random terror feelings. The depression has improved but still feels worse than before. I cry all day every day. Eating has improved but not 100 back to normal. Any tips. Insights. Support. Oh and I take vitamin c, vitamin d, and I read on here to do magnesium so I do that at a low dose too. Even if all you did was just read this...thank you.
  13. Success story: mranxious-update-years-later Hello folks, Wow I came across this website and it definitely helped my outlook on this horrid process of withdrawling from Anti- Depressants. Here is my story. Life was good I was 23 years old, sitting in my University Class seminar, participating with my class, when out of nowhere all these feelings came rushing over me, people started to go sideways, couldn't really talk. Long story short I dropped out of University and went home to parents. I Went to an emerg clinic and was diagnosed with Generalized anxiety disorder(Gad). Immediately I was giving a prescription for Effexor xr 150mg, followed up with my doctor and was up at 225mg for awhile and 150mg for awhile over a 6 year period. I am now 29 years old, about 4 months ago the effexor pooped out, well it may have pooped out a year before that, but we all know how addicting it is. Went through the stigma , perceived personality changes, felt brilliant and ability to talk, got lots of good jobs, was able to be social, felt at times like it was a miracle drug, then slowly over time I lost my jobs, gf's , starting smoking marijuana heavily, took up smoking cigarettes and had anger and frustration issues, never had this before the medication. My doctor just refilled my prescriptions and never really questioned how I was doing on this medication. If I missed a dose one day I would have horrible symptoms. Long story short I feel effexor got me through the first initial espisode I had, but eventually ruined my social life, career life etc. It's been a tough trip. So after this medication pooped out 5 months ago I figured lets try to go off this and tapered off during a two months period.150mg to 75mg to 37.5 then half of 37.5 and then half of that,then off. I quit Effexor on March 22/2012 after being on it since 2005. Wow Lets just say after I came off it I felt so amazing, I saw everything in a fresh new light- like this is what life is like off this? Colors are brighter, Smell is better, everything changed for the positive after coming off it. Rose colored glasses you should say came off. I quit my 2 addictions of Cigs and pot immediately, was so proud of myself, fixed up debts that I wouldn't have touched on effexor. I felt like I had total control of my life, except for how to deal with these raw emotions , felt like a brand new person. Until... The 3 month mark being off Effexor, wow. Anxiety, Insomnia( not sleeping til 730am), not being able to look at somebody and talk to them in a normal light( was never a issue all my life). One week ago I tried Wellbutrin for 5 days and then withdrawled off it 150mg xl. It was just making me more anxious etc. Now the biggest problem I face is feeling like my memory/words have disapeared, can't make sentences or think of what to say and this was never a problem in my life and it's bothering me big time and I don't know what to do, as I feel like my brain has been messed up by 6 years of effexor highest dose 225mg but mostly 150mg. How do I get this back? I need some good responses here because I feel like a complete dummie as my mind has been erased. Thank you for reading this extremely long post, but I didn't want to leave anything important out, and I really want to move on with a life that I can accept and enjoy. Where has my memory gone? Will it comeback? How long if so? My words and ability to talk to people and come up with things to say? Very scared, What can I do? Use to be so smart I am Martin and that is my story, Glad to be a part of this group (29 years old) ^6 years on effexor , now 3months off 2005-2012 , March 22/2012 Off Effexor
  14. Blujay's success story: bluejay-i-survived-you-can-too Hello Everyone, I was pretty much amazed and so thankful when I stumbled upon this website a month ago. I read so many posts from people going through the same challenges as me and I am so grateful to get feedback and support and optimism from those who actually know what it is like to come off anti-depressants. So first off, thanks so much for reading and helping me with your advice. I'll try to make my story quick. In 2009 when I was 28 years old, I suffered a vertigo episode and noticed I was constantly dizzy. I went through many tests, brain MRI's and the physician assistant I saw told me he could 'fix crazy' if none of the tests showed anything. We;; guess what? I was apparently crazy! (sarcasm) Mind you, my boyfriend and I had recently separated, my dog had died, I had moved, my friend co-workers switched to a new job and I had a new position at my job--lots of stress. He never explained therapy, CBT or anything. He said I'd need to be on it for life that I was anxious and it was my nature to need the medicine. So I was prescribed 10 mg of Celexa and .5 mg of Klonopin. I did not take the Klonopin everyday. Around 2011 I was upped to 20 mg of Celexa. In 2016 the meds didn't work and a new doctor wanted me switching. I began to wonder if I could manage life without them since I went 28 years without them in the first place. So I also wanted to get pregnant. A year a a half ago my dr said get off the pills in two weeks. Online, I read about horrifying things if I did that with extreme withdrawls so I made my own taper. Honestly I can't remember exactly, but it took me 6 months to go from 20 to 10 mg then I stayed on 10 mg for 6 months to stabilize and then I weaned from 10 mg to 0 in 6 months. A total of 1.5 year taper. Unfortyuantelu had I known about this site, maybe my taper and experience woyuld be better now but the last month of my taper I was at 2.5 mg and felt great, was looking forward to summer and so I stopped the meds. This same week I had a pelic/back injury to my SI Joint. So I went into a spiral of panic from the injury and I feel like my well planned taper backfired. I spent two months going from several doctors to get a diagnosis on my back and so I was freaking out about my back but all the while this heightened my anxiety and my depression. I've been off the Celeza since mid May 2018. I still have a 15 pill prescription of Klonopin that I only take a 1/2 dose if it is extreme and have only taken about 5 pills total in the past 5 months. I've been having many symptoms and the most hard to deal with currently is the feeling as though I cannot breathe. I looked it up as dypsnea. I feel like the only way to fully breath is to yawn very deeply, but that doesn't always work and I still have such tightness in my chest. This has been going on for about 2 months now and I can't figure out how to get past it. Also my jaw gets so tight and I get a lump in my throat. I also have wobbly shaking legs, jitteryness, some dizziness, shaking hands. My thoughts are very dark, I am constantly thinking about death, not hurting myself, but the sadness of things ending and not seeing those I love. I feel like I cannot be happy. I am crying so much even about silly things like undercooking salmon the other day! I feel hysterical but also, I am going to work, putting on a clam face, driving to my three therapies a week (two PT and one CBT) so I am doing a routine but it is so hard. I wonder if this is my new normal or will I level out and get a grip and feel better. Currently because of my anxiety and my injury I can't possible have a child and at 37 years old I really feel like I don't know what to look forward to in my life. I just don't know how to deal with stress and not let it take a hold of me. I'm the type of person who likes to plan and well, that's a bad thing when you don't know how your future looks. Meaning I guess I realizing how boring life can be at least this is how my outlook is on life right now and I am frustrated by it. I am also thankful to be off the meds, too, though because I feel like I am fully analyzing my life and realizing I need to make more positive changes like eating healthy, doing hobbies and not relying on my boyfriend to make me happy, but this is a slow change and I am someone who wants results so fast. I'm scared, honestly because I really don't want to live on anti-depressants and though I've been off of them completely since mid May 2018, four months, I hope things improve and am here to help others with my story and seek help from you, too. Thank you so much for reading my story and I wish you healing and love. Any suggestions or advice will be so GRATEFULLY appreciated!!
  15. Success story: cocopuffz-11-years-on-paroxetine-its-nothing-but-a-bad-memory-now-i-am-now-free Hello, I am new here. I really appreciate everyone posting their stories, struggles or successes. It helps me understands what I have been through WAY better. I was on paroxetine(20 mg) for 11 years for social anxiety. I was told by my psychiatrist that it would be "a vitamin I take for the rest of my life". Little did I know it would rob me off all my emotions in life. Over the last 11 years I have had a decent amount of "we dont know why this happens" health conditions. I now look back and blame alot of it on this drug. Since coming off of this drug my health conditions have improved, but some of the withdrawal symptoms kick my butt here and there. Reading the success stories, I know these will get better with time. So I am keeping my nutrition dialed in and my attitude positive. Thanks!
  16. Success story: karenrose-i-successfully-came-off-after-years-of-trying Hi everyone. It is great to have a forum like this. I am so grateful to find qualified help. I was given an antidepressant 13 years ago to help with a deep depression that no psychotherapy or alternative approach would help with. Paxil was a godsent at the time. However, with my first attempt to come off, I learned how destructive these drugs can be and had to go to Cymbalta, then Lexapro. I came off again, this time with aminoacids and was succesful for about 6 months. I got very depressed again and went back on Lexapro. After several traumatic events I learned that I had Hashimoto's and finally understood how to treat this. My depression abated. Over the last two years I have tapered off Lexapro - very difficult, but succesful to the point that I am now on 1mg instead of 45. I am struggling with the last mg and have horrible symptoms when I try to go off. Looking in this forum to try to find ways to taper more slowly off 1mg. Will elaborate on this later. This is my quick intro for now. Thank you so much for this life saving forum.
  17. Hello everyone I am new to this site, and am really really appreciative of all the information shared and support given. I am undergoing protracted withdrawal syndrome, after 21/2 years on lexapro. Began taking it after stressful circumstances. This is my second attempt at withdrawal. the first attempt was too quick (these were doctor's instructions! , and I returned to the drug - Also doctor's instructions...). The second attempt, I tapered over 10 months following recommendations from peer websites. I understood that doctors know nothing and refused to see a doctor again.( I am furious about this) The tapering (10% of the current dose) worked quite well. But, after I stopped completely from a seemingly infinitesimal amount of the drug, I got the worst symptoms: mainly generalized anxiety, irritability, crying spells, feelings of doom, insomnia, tinnitus, hot flushes, muscle pains, head zaps, dizziness, head fog, the works. I have never had these symptoms, and that quality of emotions before, and it took a long time beofre I understood them to be part of a syndrome. No one had ever informed me of that possibility, and I found out by myself, by surfing. I was scared out of my wits, and really believed I am losing it. Luckily, I did managed to function at work and at home. In fact, I discovered that keeping busy was one of the best ways to deal with my symptoms I am now 7 months after complete discontinuation, and still experiencing waves and windows. Strangely, these can happen over the course of one day. I may wake up feeling extremely anxious and/or depressed, then after a few hours will feel more of a well being. Then, the next day, terrible crying spells and feeling hopeless, sometimes having thoughts about my life not worth living. Then - a pleasant dinner with friends.. I never know what will happen next. I have dealt with the syndrome mainly by daily physical activities (walking, jogging, yoga, meditation, taking hikes in nature), supplements (Omega, Vitamin B complex, magnesium), psychotherapy, getting informed, keeping a log of symptoms, observing and listening to what's happening, and a lot of support from a few friends and family members. Sometimes I am afraid this will never end. At times I get more hopeful. At the moment, my most troubling symptom is my fear of my own rumbling thoughts (obsessive thoughts about a bleak future, fear of death, fear of being alone, fear of disaster or things going terribly wrong, for me and my dear ones. I do know that these thoughts have no relation to reality, but I still feel them). These thoughts typically arise when I am alone, mainly in my own home. Weekends are especially a nightmare. I deal with this by keeping busy, trying to be around friendly and sensitive people, staying away from stressful situations, making pleasant weekend plans with friends. But that is not always possible. Does anyone have any thoughts/suggestions? Will this ever end? Thank you everyone for the support.
  18. Brooke Hi everyone! I'm thrilled to finally be posting here. I've been lurking here and there since 2016, when I first found Surviving Antidepressants when I was considering getting off of the Effexor XR and Wellbutrin XL I'd been taking from age 15-30. Like so may of you, withdrawal was hell on Earth. I experienced everything from homicidal visions to extreme noise sensitivity to rage to a bizarre blood vessel disorder called nodular vasculitis. Combined with the tsunami of pain and trauma that came gushing out after I removed my antidepressant band aid, and I was a barely functioning, terrified mess with no psychiatric support. I was lucky, though, to have some resources outside the traditional mental health system that helped me work through my experience, and today I am proud to say that I consider myself cured of chronic depression haven't taken a prescription drug since 2016. It's taken me until now to actually participate in the forum because I needed to know that I was in a solid place. So much of the internet (I'm looking at you Twitter...) can be a triggering environment, and had to make sure that I could mentally handle it. But I trust in the work I've put in, and I'm ready! I say all this not to boast, but to wave from the distance and do my best to act as an example of success. I know that when I was in withdrawal and working through all the trauma, I would have done anything to know that there were people out there who were thriving after spending half their life on antidepressants. Instead, it felt like I was in uncharted waters. I wrote about this for the Washington Post earlier this year, and the flood of support and stories I got in response was overwhelming and heartbreaking. Anyway, happy to answer any questions, and much love to you all. Brooke
  19. JanCarol ☼ Reboxetine first, then Lithium I’ll start with the Success Part, before I unfold the story. I am a classic poster-girl story of “Why You Should Taper.” I thought I couldn’t come off the drugs, I was convinced I was a “biological bipolar” – but by using SA’s conservative 10% or less tapering system, I hardly had any withdrawals this time, and could control my symptoms and make space for my stressors by holding. I’m a living example of why anyone should taper and hold in order to come off. And there is no such thing as too slow. I attribute my success to the SA taper, and a number of coping strategies. I got support. I had a psychologist, who was wholly supportive. I bullied my psychiatrist to do the taper “my way” instead of her way. She actually had helpful suggestions for lifestyle changes, too. I got an acupuncturist, a massage therapist, and later added an orthomolecular doctor and osteopath. I told my husband and all of my friends. I prepared for my taper. I owe so much to those who walked this path before me: AltoStrata, GiaK, Rhiannon, Petunia, BrassMonkey, MammaP, Bubble, Dalsaan, MeiMeiQuest, CymbaltaWithdrawal5600, and many more. And – to go further afield – Robert Whitaker for his excellent book, “Anatomy of an Epidemic,” and Will Hall for the “Icarus Harm Reduction Guide to Coming off Psychiatric Drugs” for showing me that it could be done, and how. And for helping me to accept that I may be different – but that different is not a medical condition. I got curious and read everything I could on the web, and learned a lot. I learned the most from SA and Beyondmeds.com. Most of what I have written as a moderator is not original – but is something I learned here or in my researches, that I applied to my life, and which I found effective. My psychiatrist resisted my desire to taper, but she told me she would support me if I put some things in place. We established a contract with my hubby, so that if I went off the rails, he would be able to get help for me. She would not taper me unless I made a commitment to take sun walks for light therapy and mood stabilization. I also eat meat and fish for mood stabilization & brain nutrition. I took up a tai chi practice and found a yoga studio which supports me. My karate mates have always supported me, even when I was too sick to participate. Meanwhile, my psychologist went to hear Robert Whitaker talk, and she came to realize how many of the cases she saw were people suffering from drug effects. She wrote glowing letters of progress to my psychiatrist, who really had no choice but to say, “Okay, I guess she’s doing well.” Nuts and bolts, I took a year to come off a low dose of reboxetine (it’s the least effective SNRI in the world, actually less effective than placebo), and another 2.5 years to come off the lithium. As I was suffering lithium toxicity (diabetes insipidus), I alternated some of my SNRI tapers with lithium tapers. I tapered 10% per month, or if while dry cutting, I had to drop by 15% (my largest taper), I would hold an extra month. I held an extra month if I had any upsets or stressors – funerals, travel, illness, bad news, etc. I held 3 months after the SNRI was gone before tapering the lithium again. My tapers were relatively symptom free. Most of my symptoms were from worry that I really was crazy – and there were mood spikes until I learned to manage my mood on my own. That’s what I should’ve learned when I got diagnosed 20 years ago. Nobody tells you that you can manage your own mood. In fact, nobody tells you that you are the only person who can manage your own mood! I greatly reduced gluten, especially wheat, and dairy. I cut the coffee way back. I start my day with protein (good for adrenals), and finish my day with carbs. I take magnesium baths whenever I feel "crunchy" and after every exercise session. I have raw food smoothies 2x a week. I take a number of supplements to manage my health without drugs. Most important: magnesium and fish oil. For mood & energy: NAC. I couldn’t take up meditation exactly, because of cult abuse in my past, but I can do tai chi and yoga, and I love breathing and mindfulness meditation. I found a great benefit to shamanic practice, because it is not worship of any foreign deity or guru, and my own inner experience is the guide to what I am learning and how I am growing. I took up creativity practices, like music, coloring, drawing, painting and writing. I took up correspondence with special people here on SA and in other places, so I could learn and grow by sharing with others. I was well supported by all of these people and practices, and I feel I have a web which will catch me if I ever fall down again. Sometimes now, I miss a practice. I might not get all the sun walks in, or I might eat wheat or dairy. But now I am well enough – I am buoyant enough – and I have enough practices – that missing one or two Jenga blocks doesn’t make the tower fall. (it also helps to not have a tall tower - our society asks too much of us, I believe, it's inhuman sometimes) When I come back, I’ll give more of my history – how crazy, abused, wild, suicidal, depressed, with unrelenting fatigue, and how I was convinced I was “bipolar.” Now, I have no diagnosis (I leave it on the medical charts so that I can refuse drugs – “No doctor, you can’t give me that, I’m bipolar!”), my body is broken from surgeries, abuse, accidents and pain. My major lasting drug effect is metabolic and autonomic dysfunction but those are compounded by surgeries, too. I still have severe delayed cycle sleep (but I always did: it is my difference), and unrelenting tinnitus. But my mental and emotional life is healthier than I’ve ever been before. I have compassion for my fellow human in a way I couldn’t before. I have passion for what I am doing, and a sense of purpose. I am driven to create, to share, to learn, to grow. I love meeting with people and listening, and feel so incredibly fortunate. I’m older and wiser than ever before, and I still have a lot of healing to do. But I am awake, alive, and grateful to be so.
  20. Just wanted to introduce before I jumped in and started posting. I was on Effexor at varying doses for roughly 18 years. I did a taper that lasted over two years, and have been completely off for 11 months. Even though I did a slow taper, I ended up developing anxiety, depression, as well as physical health problems. That's the basics, and I can add more later if necessary.
  21. Aria's recovery from poly drugs. I had no idea when I walked into a psychiatrist's office 25 yrs ago the horrible labyrinth I'd entered. Slam dunked at a point in my life when I was feeling low and the loss of future possibilities taken away. Being told I was mentally ill, would never function again, needed to be on disability and poly drugged for the rest of my life repeatedly took it's toll. All this impacted my relationships with family, friends and enjoying life. The pdoc constantly added new psych drugs, changed doses and took me off the old drugs at an alarming rate. I became a morbidly obese woman who mumbled or talked rapidly and it was obvious to everyone but the pdoc I was totally messed up on something. I had Seroquel Induced Acute Pancreatitis that landed me in the hospital for quite awhile and my pdoc put in my open med chart I was crazy. I didn't know this till later but ill as I was I did notice some of my physicians were treating me oddly. One good thing about being so ill was I referred to a neurologist for chronic pain and found out my problem was profound drug induced Akathsia. This neurologist actually screamed at me, these psych drugs are killing you, they're killing you. I knew I had to get off these drugs not matter what it took and reclaim my life. At my next appointment I asked my psychiatrist why he was drugging me like this and he looked directly at me (probably for the first time in years he saw "me"). He started sobbing, loudly sobbing, "Oh God what have I done to you", over and over. I'm sitting there thinking oh crap, I don't need this. Our 15 minute med check was up and this guy calmly goes to the front desk to get the next patient and proceeds without any other fanfare. He's robot. A robot. All this in itself was mind boggling. Hell, closure?? No way. I found out I had Tardive Dyskinesia and a few other psych drug induced issues. My face was a road map with twitches and jerking that yelled hey, I'm on massive psychiatric drugs. Will my face be like this forever?? The TD has mostly gone away and I'm so grateful (the pdoc adamantly said I did not have Tardive Dyskinesia from psych drugs). Well, guess what?? The psychiatrist was wrong...horribly wrong. Other doctors, psychiatrist, therapists said you're not mentally ill and never had been. The sad but very scarey part is I'm labeled as profoundly mentally ill and that info is in my medical charts. One pdoc did this...one. I've gone through the gambit of emotions dealing with this. I will probably always be mad at this jerk for what he did to me and for what he still does to others. It affected years of my life and he was wrong. I'm a Success Story because I'm psych drug free and have been for several years. My journey was extremely difficult and I did it on my own hit or miss tapering off numerous psychiatric drugs. I endured drug withdrawals that paralyzed me month after month. Was it worth the hell of tapering? Yes, very much yes. My reward was my clarity of mind, my passions for life returned and I have hopes for my future. I mended fences with family and have made new friends. I strive everyday to be productive. I'm me but a different me because no one could go through all this and not be changed by it. (for more in-depth conversations about my struggles, coping and self awareness with surviving psychiatry please visit my ongoing thread Aria's Psych Journey http://survivinganti...psych-journey/)
  22. Hi everybody. My name is Gus from Australia. I think i may have found the right site here. I've been on effexor 150mg/day (most of the time. 200mg/day at worst times, 100/day at better times)for about 11 years, was on zoloft, aropax and citolopram for short times beforehand. I wish i'd found this site earlier as it has some great advice for tapering. Too late though as i've already done that with a set of ebay scales and a calculator. Tapered over about 4 months(yeah i know, too fast according to this site). Even still, a lot slower than the doctors would have me do it. I'd just got down to 75mg and a dr told me to go on 37.5 for 2 weeks then just stop. I took his precription to avoid an arguement and threw it in the bin once i got home. Once i got down to about 60mg/day i only dropped it by about 5mg/week. I've been on zero for just over 9 weeks. If my wife hadn't suggested i try her magnesium powder(as it may help with stress) i'd be a complete mess. This stuff really helps. Are there many people out there who can please tell me how long it took to get back to where you were before you started effexor? What kind of symptoms, waves and windows you had and how often did you have each and how long did they last each time you had them? Also, i've heard omega 3's are usefull. Can anyone please tell me how so? What do they relieve and how much to take? Any informed/positive replies are very welcome. Regards, Gus.
  23. Hi all, this is my first post on this forum I am confused and am looking for some advice regarding possibly tapering off of St. John's Wort. I was put on SJW by a naturopath back in June (2018) to help ease the withdrawal symptoms of tapering off of Paxil (10mg) which I had been on for 10 years. I basically began tapering off of Paxil starting in Feb 2018 and I believe I went a bit too fast; I definitely started to feel all of the typical WD symptoms once I got down past half of my original dose and by June (at the end) I was feeling pretty crappy. I went to see my naturopath who put me on a supplement to support mood (Thorne product "Mood Plus") which contains 100 mg of 5-HTP and 100 mg of GABA, 400 mg of L-Tyrosene, 100 mg of Rhodiola, and 100 mg of ginseng among other, more minor vitamins (including b12). She also gave me St. Johns Wort and told me to take one 400 mg capsule 3 times per day (total of 1200 mg) . I can't really say that I felt a huge difference in my mood after starting these supplements (nor that I do now), but I think there was some 'lift' to my spirits, bearing in mind that other factors that boosted my mood may have been the fact that it was summer, the sun was shining, and I was going on a big adventure in July (trip to Morocco). The one thing I have noticed since June / July is that I have had a lot of trouble with sleep. It is hard to really tell if it is the SJW though because there have been some good nights of sleep...and there are so many factors that influence mood and sleep. Generally speaking, my 'withdrawal symptoms' tend to be more on the anxiety and agitation end of the spectrum as opposed to depression... recently, I have begun to wonder about the SJW and if that wasn't causing or at least exacerbating my symptoms. I spoke with my naturopath just the other day and she said that this should't be the case and I should keep taking it (it has been basically 5 months now). She said that SJW is calming and most people really derive a soothing effect from it. But, after having read things on this site re how the sensitized nervous system can have different reactions to things versus the 'typically functioning' nervous system, I still have my doubts. I am also more than a bit peeved to read that SJW can cause withdrawal symptoms if it is stopped too abruptly. Given the hell the past few months have been after coming off the Paxil, I am not keen to go through another 'withdrawal saga'... I don't know what to do...should I keep taking the SJW? If not, how would it be best to taper, given that it has been 5 months on it? Right now I have decided to only take 2 capsules (so 800 mg) per day and only up to 1 pm...maybe that's too much of a drop, but I don't know how else to do it since the capsules cannot be cut. I figure I can do this for a few weeks then go down to 1 capsule..? Again, I am not sure it IS the SJW that is causing me symptoms, but I feel like I need to minimize what I have in my body at this point so that it can regulate / heal itself. Any advice / thoughts would be much appreciated. Oh, and BTW, when I asked the naturopath about tapering off of SJW she said she had never heard of people having adverse reactions to quitting SJW cold turkey...sheesh! Thanks!
  24. This site is a go-to to reassure myself that others are traveling and have traveled this road. The discussions about emotional spirals (check) and anxiety, rumination and dread on waking up (check) and depression even worse than before medication (check) have been helpful. I am being extra mindful now of taking Mag powder in the morning and before bed. I started AA and kundalini yoga in mid-May which have both been helpful. Although I really didn't drink much, it was enough (and mostly alone, not social) and any depressant when you are coming off an antidepressant can't be helpful. Also, I changed from hatha/vinyasa yoga to kundalini yoga which is more focused on the spiritual component of yoga. I won't lie: at 4 months, I still fall daily into waves of depression and loneliness. But I do find that there are glimmers of happier times and I am getting clearer -- I hope -- about how to handle the tough times (for instance, I just now think that my beloved dog has a fever and am trying not to emotionally spiral -- ugh). I will be reading this site like mad just to remind myself that I am not alone. Farm Girl Works Tapered 75mg Sertraline March 2017 in 4weeks after 6 years mostly on with a few unsuccessful WD Stopped Sertraline April 1, 2017
  25. please help, what supplement should i take, how much exercises should i do, i am feeling nothing from the medication at 4mg/day,will i get back to who i am before with all my memories back etc?i am so scared guys, at the same time, i am having memory problems from the medication due to misdiagnose , is cold turkey a better approach?
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