Search the Community

After my too-fast taper 8 months ago, I spent about 4 months in bed. Since then, I experience waves of not being able to do much and having to spend a lot of time in bed. A couple weeks ago a very stressful event happened that really set me back. I've been in bed almost all day every day since then. I've gained about 20 lbs in the 8 months I've been in withdrawal. I'm about 40 lbs overweight, now. Compared to the severity of the other symptoms I experience though, weight loss is not at the top of my list of priorities right now. I recently saw my mother several times and every time she told me I needed to lose weight. As though I don't already know that. I'm not comfortable or proud of the weight I've gained. It hurt my feelings that during the most difficult time of my life she would focus on criticizing me. It is a pattern of hers to be overly critical and negative, but I need her support and kindness right now more than ever. I explained that I knew I had gained weight and that I've not been able to do as much as I normally do. She just wouldn't stop criticizing my weight, and I got very angry. I told her to stop. I've given her resources to help her understand what I'm going through, but she just doesn't get it. I have talked to her a lot about withdrawal and how difficult this process has been. I think she's tired of me talking about it. I live alone and don't have much social support. I've had to rely on my parents a lot during the past year. It's been unhealthy and demoralizing, but I've had to in order to survive. Has anyone else faced this kind of lack of empathy and understanding? How have you dealt with it and was how you dealt effective? I would love your feedback.

Hello, I came across this site and im hoping I can just vent to you guys and get to know some people who may be going through something similar to what I am going through. So, a little about my situation: I'm 23 years old, I was in an abusive relationship for two years, in this relationship I was physically abused, sexually abused but most importantly, I was psychologically and emotionally abused. I FINALLy grew the courage to leave. I was in therapy after that to deal with the aftershock of everything that happened to me. One day I went to my family doctor and told him about what happened to me and that I had panic attacks and anxiety. He prescribed Lexapro. After five or six weeks of being on the drug I noticed I was starting to look like a cow. (and after FINALLY having reached my goal weight before going on lexapro, this was heart breaking) I went to my doctor and told him I wanted to go off of the drug... He told me to take half of a pill (5mg.) per day for five days and to go off of it entirely after. Well, five days of 5mg. and then two days of nothing and on the night of the seccond lexapro free day I tried to commit suicide by cutting myself and overdosing on a bunch of different drugs. I HAVE NEVER BEEN SUICIDAL! Never, never, ever! I have always been able to handle things. I dont want to die! I have never wanted to die! I was in the hospital for 4 days and I didnt feel better untill they put me back on lexapro. I am not suicidal! It had never even crossed my mind! So what in the world happened to me!?!?!? They quickly diagnosed me with depression... and so ive been back on lexapro for another 7 weeks... and getting fatter by the day! im trying to keep an eye on what I eat, and im trying to excersize! im trying everything but I keep getting bigger.... its making me so depressed... Im going to talk to my doctor tomorrow and ask him to take me off of it and put me on something else... I know I should be happy that im better menatlly and to just endure the weight gain but its just so heart breaking to me because I have been struggling with my weight since I was about 12 years old! If I had never gone on lexapro, I would probably be in a better place than where I am today. I should have just done things how I am used to doing them and that is medication-free and just by being tough... Lexapro made me such a coward.... I tried to end my life! so pathetic!!! I FINALLY was able to wear a bikini and feel amazing in it... well, that feeling didnt even last a week... because I went on lexapro the same week I reached my goal weight. I hate lexapro, I want to go off of it ASAP. At least now I have a good doctor who is actually a psychiatrist and not a family doc.) Ive learned to ALWAYS see a PSYCHIATRIST if you are taking ANY psychotic drugs. I hope and pray I can loose the weight.... its a huge deal for me... Ive gained almost 30 lbs in 3 months. xoxo Kayem