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  1. Hey all, 36 year old here – trying to sort out withdrawal effects, med side effects and potential underlying medical issues. Current meds: Bupropion (Wellbutrin) IR – 75mg w/breakfast, 37.5 w/ lunch, 37.5 with dinner (150 mg total) Amphetamine salts (Adderall) – 2.5 mg morning, 2.5 mg afternoon (5 mg total) Caffeine – 100 mg late morning Loratadine (Claritin) – 10 mg w/ breakfast Cefuroxime (antibiotic) – 250 mg morning, 250 mg evening Doxylamine Succinate (OTC sleep aid) – 17.5 mg before bed Current / past health issues: Depression – on and off since about 2000, started Bupropion in 2009 Anxiety – has always been low level, much worse since WD started IBS – dx around 2000 Chronic bladder inflammation (interstitial cystitis) – dx in 2010 Prostatitis – sort of chronic, reason for current antibiotics WD history, short version: Started Bupropion (SR) about 10 years ago. 2018 tapered 50 mg at a time from 300 down to 150. 2/2019 tried to taper from 150 to 100 and stopped due to withdrawal effects. Effects returned 4/2019 despite no dose change. Ended up switching from 150 SR to 150 IR on April 26th, and made large cut to my Adderall and Caffeine doses April 29th. Still recovering from symptoms and trying to stabilize fully. WD history, long version: In 2018, I started tapering the Bupropion down 50 mg at a time (at the advice of my doctor) starting at 300 mg. At the time I was taking the SR formulation. Sept/Oct 2018 - I taped from 200 mg to 150 mg around and got fairly sick for a week in October. Upset stomach, fever, flu-like symptoms. At the time I thought it was just a stomach bug, but after having similar symptoms during WD I’ve been wondering if it was WD. Feb 2019 - Tried to taper from 150 mg to 100 mg and experienced severe dizziness, nausea, fever/chills and sinus symptoms. I went back up to 150 mg after 5 days and felt better within a day or two . April 14th - Picked up my Rx refill, and on April 15th I started to feel lightheaded, dizzy and tired. I got worse over the next few days with headache, congestion, fever/chills, nausea and chest pain. I went to an emergency dentist on 4/21 thinking it might be an abscessed tooth (they said tooth looked fine) and went to urgent care due to pain while urinating. Urine culture was normal, and I tested negative for flu. I went to my PCP on 4/23 with very bad shakes in addition to the other symptoms. At this point, I started wondering if my new refill had somehow been a “bad batch” of the generic meds, so I got an Rx for the same meds from a different manufacturer. I tried that for two days with no improvement. 4/26, I switched from Bupropion SR (taken once a day at this point) to Bupropion IR (taken 3 times a day). The total dose didn’t change. Also had blood work done (CBC w/ diff, comp metabolic panel) – results normal. 4/29, following a morning with very rapid heartbeat, I cut my ADD meds (generic Adderall) from 15 mg to 5 mg. I also cut my daily caffeine from 200 mg to 100 mg. I’d reduced both the ADD meds and the caffeine in the past without any apparent ill effects, so I didn’t think it would have any effect this time around. 5/6 – 5/13 - Symptoms mainly resolved, except for some GI issues. 5/14 I had a rash, fever and shaking. Bad anxiety due to symptoms – went to Urgent Care b/c of rash. Over the next week I also started getting nauseous. 5/22 – Had blood work done again - (CBC w/ diff, comp metabolic panel plus ESR-Wes+CRP to check for inflammation). Also had Urine Analysis. All results normal. 5/29 – 6/6 again felt mostly better save for some lasting GI issues including mild belly pain. 6/6 had fever, chills, fatigue, added dizziness and shakiness over the next few days Most of June: occasional dizziness and stomach pains. 6/17 - Tried to taper from 150 to 131. Reinstated after a few days dizziness and nausea. Early July: Feverish, pains in stomach and chest. Occasional tightness in chest and heart palpitations. Lots of anxiety about symptoms. Started antibiotic July 17th. Current (past few days): some pain in stomach and chest, more frequent heart palpitations. Stomach a bit upset (probably due to antibiotics). I’m seeing a therapist every other week, mostly about anxiety. I’d been planning (hoping) to try tapering the Bupropion again this coming week because I have a few weeks off work, but I’ve having second thoughts since I just started the antibiotic. Also wondering if it would be better to taper the caffeine first, since I should be able to get off that more easily. Glad I found this site, very good to know I’m not the only one 😊
  2. I was on paxil for 18 years, my stupid doctor switched me to lexapro without weening the paxil (this happened more than a yer ago) My brain went into total dysfunction. I haven't been close to the same since. Since this time Ive went through a brutal ativan withdrawal and been on 10 different medications. I recently tried to get off paxil 10 mg and made it to 2 1/2 mg and then went into withdraw. I also was weening off abiIify during this time as well. I know now to soon and too fast. I am experiencing extreme fatigue, flu like symptoms, suicidal ideation constantly and some insomnia. Its horrific. I have since bumped my paxil back up to ten mg's about two and a half weeks ago but there is no improvement. As of right now I am also taking 300 mgs of wellbutrin which I've been taken for 6 months. I also take trazadone for sleep. Can someone give me some advice as to what the best path would be from here? I am pretty desperate.
  3. I'm a 25 year old female. I began taking Wellbutrin 75 mg in February 2019. I realized that my anxiety increased significantly, so my doctor suggested adding on another medication. I began Pristiq 25 mg at the end of November 2019. It made me calm down, but lowered sex drive. Could get turned on but not masturbate. In late December 2019 I developed Serotonin Syndrome, because I used St. Johns Wort along with these medications and accidentally took two Pristiq one day. I couldn't feel or think. I was almost catatonic. I was numb from my face to my feet. My ****** included and I didn't even find anyone attractive. No interest in sex. Emotionally, I couldn't feel much, but cry sometimes out of fear. I couldn't remember things or focus. I couldn't feel when I had to pee or poop. My doctor wanted me to wean off the Pristiq. She told me to take my pill every three days for two weeks. I began doing that Tuesday January 6th. I saw minor improvements throughout the week and the Sunday January 12th, it seemed as though it all lifted. I felt like me again. I could laugh and cry. I felt desire for love and a relationship again. I could masturbate and orgasm and they were intense. I was so relieved and happy that I only had one more week of taking Pristiq. I was happy that I felt like a person again. I took my Pristiq the next day, Monday, January 13th. I was weary about it, but figured I should wean myself off it one more week like the doctor instructed. I heard the withdrawals were brutal anyways. I felt great Monday. Tuesday and Wednesday it slowly went downhill. I could still masturbate and orgasm until Wednesday evening. My ****** became dry. I couldn't get turned on. My head felt heavy and my forehead became numb. I didn't feel like myself. Again. I can display very few emotions, except to cry sometimes. I don't care about anything and feel detached. Today, I could *****************, but I don't feel anything. I felt a little more like myself in the morning, was able to cry during a tv show and feel slight sensation when someone kissed. I But now going into the evening, I am losing these feelings again. I spoke with the doctor and she told me to stop taking the Pristiq. So the last one I took was on the 13th. Is this normal? The beginning of PSSD? (I know it's early, but this is odd) Anyone experience anything similar? Any support while I go through this would be wonderful. I will keep everyone updated on my progress if they are interested. I have a comprehensive list of my symptoms and medications I was taking up to this point included. Untitled 3.pdf
  4. Zpssd

    Zpssd: Plz help

    I stopped fluvoxamine 2 months ago and started expiriencing sexual dysfunction so i went to my psychiatrist and he added bupropraon(wellbutrin).its been 4 days and i am not noticing any improvement.i need to know that my syptoms wont worsen as long as i am on ssri again
  5. Hello, I am a 50 year old woman with a history of depression. Here is my story and it is a long one, be warned - if you aren't in the mood for a long history, skip this now LOL! I'm one of those people whose family relations have also had histories of depression, and depression became an issue for me from maybe 10 years old and up, though no one really recognized it. I became bulimic at 16 and remained so for much of my adult life until about eight years ago. My adult-hood has been one of perfectionism, low self-esteem and under-performing, with all the self-hatred that that generates. My first experience with medication came after a rough relationship where I ended up feeling suicidal. I was put on Prozac. I think back to that being the beginning of the rest of my adulthood with virtually no libido. A major move after marriage led me to more depression, and at that time Wellbutrin was being marketed heavily, so I asked my GP to put me on it. No tapering of the Prozac, if I recall. Wellbutrin didn't work, but now I realize it was probably in part because I was having withdrawal from the Prozac - not sure and I don't have a lot of memories about that period one way or another. I forget if I continued the Wellbutrin up to the next change, but I had gotten the flu which turned into pneumonia for a month, and when I went to the doctor after that long of not getting better, he said "you are depressed." Well, yes, I said, I am depressed because of being sick this long! And he said, No, you are clearly a generally depressed person and you should see a p-doc. So, I did, and that doc put me on Effexor. This was somewhere back around 11 years ago. I upped the dose as they directed. I never felt like my depression was well-controlled because none of the therapy I had over the years was CBT - talk therapy would make me feel better for the moment but no change took place, so the low self-esteem and negative thinking remained. I guess the Effexor somehow made my life more tolerable, but I never felt happy or satisfied with myself. Somewhere along the line I began to taper down on the Effexor, and I have very few memories of when, how or why, other than that I hated needing ADs, and my libido sucked. A move and the loss of an old dog sent me into another bad depression, but this well could have coincided with stepping down the Effexor. Three years ago, I lost my job, and then my husband lost his, but then he got a new one which required relocating to a very hot climate where we were able to afford a home with acreage, the first time we were ever able to own, but it was very rural and the isolation quickly got to me, with anxiety increasing for various reasons. Again, I don't remember the stepping down process, but two years ago a new GP refilled my Effexor but prescribed the non-extended release version. Since these tablets were able to be broken, I began taking just half (37.5 mg). Last summer I had a bought of shingles and became very depressed and stressed again from the pain. I also was clearly in menopause and having severe hot flashes. My whole adult life had been marred by low libido since going on Prozac way back when, and the shingles were actually on my private parts (tested positive for zoster, not herpes) and I became very concerned that I didn't want the rest of my life to be joyless where sex was concerned, so I decided to go off BCPs and Effexor. In hind sight, that was madness! I stepped down the Effexor, going to every other day with the 37.5 mg. I wasn't aware of any severe symptoms, and this was last summer. Well, meanwhile, I was going through some stresses regarding a health crisis with one of my dogs. I found myself totally scatter-brained, forgetful, unable to concentrate, and also I had trouble articulating myself, unable to complete thoughts when talking with people, words hard to reach. A friend told me he always thought I was ADD, and indeed at this time I was losing things, forgetting what I was doing halfway through doing it, easily distracted, etc. I'm also a total clutter-bug who can't face doing the dishes or cleaning the house, though I've been that way for years. I had started taking Sam-e and tryptophan as a way to up serotonin. I was having a terrible time with insomnia. So, I went to get tested for ADD. I tested negative, but the psychologist doing the testing said I didn't have ADD, but that I did have OCD, depression, and GAD. He said, the good news is that there are medications that can make you "normal!" I bit, and went to a p-doc on a list he gave me. She put me on Viibryd. I stopped the serotonergic supplements. The first week at 10 mg was ok, but when I went up to 20 mg as instructed, all hell broke loose! My insomnia worsened, with the most severe anxiety I think I had ever experienced! All night I was thrashing around with racing, troubling thoughts. During the day, I would have squirts of adrenalin for no reason. I had days where I was so distressed and troubled, I couldn't stand to exist. I had global anxiety about climate change, getting old, my parents getting old losing them some day, the drought and how horrible life was! I have never experienced anxiety like that in my life! I stepped the Viibryd back down to 10 mg for about a week and then stopped it, and went back on the supplements. This time I was trying to follow the supplement plan laid out in the Mood Cure, adding GABA and some other stuff. I'd do ok for awhile, but the insomnia was still bad, and the general feeling of being ill-at-ease was so disturbing, I just couldn't stand it. So, I stopped the supplements and started taking 37.5 mg of Effexor again. After three days, I was in serotonin syndrome almost to the point of having to go to the ER! I stopped the Effexor and got an appointment with another p-doc who is a DO and actually not into psych meds. He said I'd been through about 3 years' worth of med changes in a very short period of time and that my nerves were very sensitive and that I needed consistency. He went through the meds and supplements I had a history with, and told me which supplements were safe to take (non-serotonergic). Since I had not been able to eat and lost weight, and the insomnia was so bad, he put me on Remeron, saying it was a very gentle med that worked on a different part of the serotonin pathway, and that it would help with sleep and appetite. He started me on 7.5 mg and said I could step it up as needed, that it was safe up to 60 mg. Well, I felt much better and it was nice to sleep all through the night without anxiety again. Yeah! But after a week, I was feeling down again so started upping the dose. Two weeks later I was at 37.5 mg, feeling totally apathetic and on the couch, unable to do anything I had previously enjoyed in life. I couldn't understand why the med wasn't working anymore! I was in a desperate way and called this p-doc's assistant, the fastest way to get to him, he said. I left four messages and never heard back! I suffered through to my next scheduled appointment with him two weeks later, and suffering it was! My family members were greatly concerned. The only thing that kept me going through this spell was the fact that a therapist I had recently seen told me about Emotional Brain Training, which I joined. It was developed by Laurel Mellin at UCSF and is based on neuroplasticity and rewiring the brain. It was perfect for me because I lived in the country, was isolated, and the city is 40 minutes away, so I was able to get support from home with weekly phone-in meetings with a coach and group members, daily work online, and daily phone-connections with group members. I am not hawking this, but if you want to learn more about it, go to www.ebt.org. Anyway, EBT kept me from going down the tubes through all of this. When I saw my p-doc, he said "let's add Effexor back to the remeron since you tolerated it well in the past." I started on 37.5 mg. The day I took it, I was having a non-functional couch day, and I would say within an hour of taking it, my mood lifted, like a light switch had been flipped! It was miraculous! Now, everyone knows that ADs are supposed to take weeks to start working. I now realize that the reason it worked so fast was because I was in withdrawal and it was like a junkie getting a hit of the drug they are withdrawing from - instant fix! Ok, I know my story is long but the final chapter is here: I added the Effexor back about 12 days ago. I actually had one day, about a week into it, where I was on the couch again. The next day, I saw a third p-doc my therapist said I should see since I had such a bad experience with the last guy's non-responsiveness when I left those messages. So, I saw this new guy on Wednesday. I didn't yet realize that all of the craziness I had endured since last fall was because of the withdrawal. I was convinced that genetically, I just had to be on ADs, that I had relapsed in a big way. I did think that the Viibryd had damaged me, since I had never experienced anxiety to that degree before, nor had I had depression this debilitating. This new guy said, "let's stick with this for now, since you haven't been on the Effexor long enough to see how it will work for you, but I want to up it to 75 mg (thanks to that couch day). We may end up changing you to other meds, but let's see how this goes for now." So, I began taking 75 mg Effexor ER on Thursday. It just so happens that one of my EBT connection buddies is going through withdrawal from ADs that she was put on for post-partum depression 8 years ago. She told me about this, and referred me to a neat video about neuroplasticity on beyondmeds.com. Her point in doing so was to point out about how EBT is so dead-on about retraining the brain, but in fact I had locked on to concept of withdrawal, and I began to realize that this was so much of what I had and am still going through, and this is why the Effexor worked immediately! So, I am faced with the fact that I am now back on the drug that I was hooked on. For now, I need to be consistent and not change anything, though I am going back to 37.5 mg Effexor since I'd only been on the higher dose for a couple of days. I will ride this out until my next appointment with the p-doc in five weeks. I am worried that he will be one to poo-poo withdrawal. I feel like, for the first time in my life, I am getting the cognitive help I need to eliminate the poor self-esteem and my negative black and white thinking that has ruined my life and got me started on ADs to begin with. I feel this will be critical to getting off these drugs some day. I feel so grateful to the universe for bringing me together with my connection buddy who brought this all to light for me. And beyondmeds.com brought me here.
  6. Hi everyone, I'm so glad to have found this community. My drug history should be in my signature, but in short I've been on antidepressants and other drugs to augment them from the age of 18 to today, when I'm 32. I'm down to just Zyban 150mg twice daily now, which I'm very proud of as coming off Duloxetine was awful. I'd like to come off the Zyban as I'm feeling well and I have been for about eight years now, but I'm very scared of what drug-free life might be like. In the past psychiatrists have told me that because I didn't find most drugs helpful I have "treatment resistant depression" and if I try to come off the drugs, find it difficult and then go back on them, they may no longer work for me. I know from a recent report released by Public Health England that the severity of antidepressant withdrawal effects are now being recognised for the first time, so maybe doctors might become more informed/helpful. But I haven't found them to be good so far. The irony is I'm a mental health professional myself. I'm confused by the idea of reducing by 10pc when the pills come in one 150mg dose - I have a pill splitter that could potentially quarter them, but going any lower sounds like it would be difficult to do accurately. I think I'll have to figure it out though, as reducing faster is just too risky. I work in a very demanding, meaningful, responsible role supporting children who have experienced trauma, and i don't want to risk my work being compromised or having to take time off work. I'm still in an ambivalent, deciding stage. I may start my journey now, or in a few months' time. I'll post updates as I go.
  7. I'm a 27 year old female and I was prescribed to Wellbutrin a year and a half ago. I had never taken any type of psychiatric medication previous to this, and was prescribed to Wellbutrin by a physician that insisted it would help with the depressive symptoms that I was experiencing due to a generalized anxiety disorder (GAD). My primary disorder at the time was GAD, and the only reason that I was experiencing depressive symptoms, is because of the change in my demeanor since becoming constantly worried about the possibility of having an anxiety attack in any social situation. The first time that I went to see a general practitioner about my general anxiety disorder, she immediately wrote me a prescription for Prozac, I took the medication a grand total of three days before having a pretty bad car accident while driving my brother to school. I went back to the doctor and she decided that it would be better if I tried going the antidepressant route. At the time I started Wellbutrin I was in my first semester of graduate school and the effects of Wellbutrin were welcome. I was able to concentrate better than ever before, and was getting all A's in school. It went this way for a little over a year, until 3 months ago when I started seeing a return of my panic attacks. I went back to the doctor and she told me that it sounded like I was building up a resistance to the dosage of medication that I was taking. I was taking a once daily immediate release dosage of 75 mg of Wellbutrin at the time and she decided it would be a good idea to up my dosage to 100 mg of sustained release in order to get me back to a base line. I went home with the medication and thought about what the up dosage meant. I had a lot to consider... I didn't want to be dependent on the medication for the rest of my life. Especially since I was taking an antidepressant medication when I didn't even actually have depression. That day I decided that I was going to quit the medication altogether.. without my doctor’s consent… I had NO IDEA how bad of an idea that would turn out to be. Fast forward to a week and a half after trying to quit wellbutrin cold turkey and I was a COMPLETE DISASTER. I was experiencing suicidal ideation (the first time I’d ever had ANY thoughts like this), MAJOR anhedonia, memory issues and extreme fatigue. I went back to my doctor to get help, because I was scared of what I was going to do. Long story short, she ended up putting me on the Wellbutrin SR 100 mg anyways so that I could level out before I started my taper process. I took the 100 mg SR every day for about 2 weeks and was having some really uncomfortable side effects. So I decided it was time for me to start weening myself off of it. I took the 100 mg SR every other day for two weeks and then every two days for another two weeks, so all in all I tapered off of the medication over a month. I know now that this was WAY too fast, but it’s too late for me to try to go back on it for a slower taper. I’m just wondering if anyone else has a similar story to mine, that can tell me what kind of recovery timeline I’m looking at. I’m experiencing some pretty sever anhedonia and memory/concentration issues that present themselves in waves.
  8. I'm rating my symptoms and trying to decide when to make a reduction. I switched from Wellbutrin extended release to immediate release, same dose, and had quite a few increased symptoms for a few weeks (suicidality, headaches, sleep disturbance, low mood). Now I'm wondering how I decide I'm stable enough to try a small, like 3% cut. I'm only a little suicidal, no headaches, still sleep disturbance and low mood. But, I wasn't all that stable when I started, so... I may never get to a more stable place... When is stable enough? HA
  9. Hi. I have been reading different posts on here for about a month. I want to taper off Lexapro, but I've been on it for over 10 years. In 2005, I was put on a very short, and ended up with brains apps and went back on it because I was super agitated. When I told my doctor I wanted to Lexapro, her idea was to switch me to Prozac. Initially, she was going to help me switch to 20 mg, but I knew that the equivalent was 40 mg, so I asked if we can do that and she said yes. I am on day two of switching from 20 mg of Lexapro to 40 mg of Prozac. I feel dizzy and have a UTI. I don't know if that can be caused by this medication switch. It kind of creeps me out. The test only showed barely any evidence of the UTI, but the doctor said I was experiencing symptoms so gave me an antibiotic. I am thinking about a post I read on here that suggested people try wean off their current drug rather than bridging to Prozac. So now I am kind of freaking out thinking that I should just go back on Lexapro and when I see my doctor in a week and a half ask if she will prescribe the liquid. I think I asked that in A message, but she suggested Prozac. I have wanted to wean off the drugs for a long time, but actually had resigned myself to staying on it for life. I felt like I was stuck. But then it was getting migraines, and my family doctor wanted to add another antidepressant Pamelor, for the migraines. At that point, I did not want to add any more, and so now I decided it was time to try to taper down. I have seen that on some sites it says Lexapro can cause migraines.
  10. Spring 2014: Effexor ? mg for 2 months then cold turkey (didnt know better at the time). Originally put on this for depression after a break up. Fall 2014: Dizziness, extreme memory issues, pins and needles in hands and feet. Occasional adderall use. Working 2 jobs to pay for engineering school. Health anxiety started when doctors couldn't find cause of symptoms. Tried samE, 5htp. Winter 2014-2015: tried molly with a friend. Ended up in the ER. Months that passed included many ER visits and eventually klonopin (? mg) Spring 2015: after researching benzo dangers wanted off. Tried to taper. Horrid withdrawal. Switched to diazepam 6mg. Dog/best friend died of cancer. Started celexa 10 mg. Rest of 2015: Moved back in with mom, slowly tapered diazepam, stopped daily on new years 2016. Winter-Spring 2016: back in school. Stopped celexa 10mg in January. Pins and needles and depression in February. Started on wellbutrin 150mg. Increased anxiety but allowed me to finish school. Graduated. Stopped wellbutrin after graduation. Summer 2016: quit job too much stress while going through what I now know to be withdrawal. Drove for ride share service when feeling well enough. Felt like living with chronic fatigue syndrome. No doctors could find cause. Fall 2016: started back on celexa 15mg after rock bottom depression. Eventually wellbutrin added back at 75mg. Moved to a new state. PM panic attacks started after going back on celexa. Started full time engineering job. Winter 2016 - Winter 2018: wellbutrin gradually increased to 300mg. Started celexa taper. 15 down to 10mg. Increase in depression but tolerable. Spring 2019: tapered celexa down to 5mg. Extremely depressed. Affected relationship. Found a psychiatrist who wanted to switch me to zoloft. Relationship break up the week of starting zoloft. Zoloft lifted depression at first. Summer 2019: got back together with boyfriend. zoloft increased to 50 then 75 then 100. Horrible reaction to 100mg. Worst anxiety of my life. Stopped cold turkey. Back on 2.5mg celexa. Dr Then tried liquid zoloft increase from 0 by 1mg every few days to cross taper with celexa. Able to stop wellbutrin easily. Also had tooth extraction during all of this (infected root canal). Fall 2019: up to 8mg zoloft 1mg celexa. Horrible anxiety. Stopped zoloft cold turkey after getting suicidal thoughts from severe anxiety. Current: trying to find a celexa dose to stabilize on. Trying 2.5 mg. Anxiety and fatigue battles daily. going to write more soon. Just wanted a quick recap to start.
  11. HI, here santking, 34y "manic" diagnosed episode in 2004. treated w lithium, benzos and prozac. 1000 mg of depakote+benzos+prozac jun-ago 2004. ago-dec 750. + prozac Dec: just 500 depakote (treatment produced strong acne. treated with roaccutan between nov 2004 to oct 2006) 2005: depakote 500 (some months w 750) + prozac and benzos- (lorazepam) dec 2005 - aug 2007: depakote 500 mg aug 2007 - 2009 alternated depakote 500 mg to 250 mg jan 2010 i started with a new psychiatrist: depakote 500 mg until sep 2012 sep 2012 started depakote + antidepressants: depakote 500 + etifoxina / paroxetine and propanodol (?) (until jun 2013) jun 2013: depakote 500mg with paroxetine and propanodol. oct 2013: change paroxetine for trazadone. until Jan 2014. jan 2014: depakote 500mg and leave trazadone jan 2014-oct 2015: depakote 500 mg oct 2015: psychiatrist introduces sertraline. suicidal attempt with sertraline overdose in jan 2016. psychiatrists increases depakote to 750 mg and introduces wellburtin. jan 2016 - dec 2017: 750mg depakote + wellburtin dec 2017 consulting another psychiatrist changed wellburtin to seroquel 25 mg dec 2017 . until jun 2018: 750mg depakote and seroquel 25 mg in jul 2018 I meet the Peter BReggin's books and SA forum and start the withdrawal process. this included consuting with psycotherapist and intense researching meeting content like Icarus project, mad in america, Rachel Aviv articles and Laura Delano's Withdrawal Project (a daily reference) ago 2018: start tapering: depakote 500 mg and seroquel in 12mg dosages (cutting to half) until nov. in dec 2018 I felt the withdrawl synthoms of seroquel leaving (insomnia, vertigo, suicidal thoughts, paranoia, anxiety, fear) Jan 2019: changed depakote dosage -tablets o sprinkles- (125 mg) taking 4 pills daily. May 2019: tried tapering without scale (reducing "half" of sprinkle aprox 437 mg) causing a week of insomnia and panic. returned with 500 mg in June. Aug 2019: started tapering with scale. sep 2019: 450 mg Oct 400 mg. Nov: 375 mg (3 pills daily) DUring November I have been taking 375 mg I have been feeling intense laziness, lack of motivation and fatigue. I tried changing diet: avoiding caffeine, alcohol, sugar, dairy and ultraprocessed foods. I had a week w insomnia and next week felt sleepness and lack of motivation (after Dec 1) RIght now I'm worried because I still feeling down and need increase energy due to personal compromises. I'm doubting if back to 400 mg or still reducing the dosage. THis based on how I'm feeling and listening the body sensations. I'm doing the tapering based on the 10% standard seeing in Breggin books, TWP and here. This is my history w psychiatry treatments and I would appreciate your help and recommendations for my case. If you need some explanations I will do it. Thank you.
  12. Hello 🙂 So long story short(not that short lol) I was put on wellbutrin 300mg xl a year ago because I was working night shifts and needed "energy"(wish I never asked tbh). Its increased my anxiety if anything ever since being on it so about 8 months ago I then was able to cut my dosage with the help of my doctor to 150mg xl. After a few months of that I went to the lowest dosage of 75mg hcl(instant release?) again under the supervision of my psychiatrist and have been on this dosage for about two months. Now that I am at the lowest dosage my last visit just last friday, I was told I can just stop taking it which I did not feel comfortable with knowing the reductions were never that easy. So my dr said to take it every other day for two weeks and then to stop taking it. So far its been 4 days out of this two week period, didnt take any today or just the other day. Today wasnt as bad as the first time I went without, but damn that fatigue and irritability was still noticeable. Sorry for the extremely long post, basically I just wanted to ask if there are any supplements that can help with withdrawal symptoms for the days I go without or in general especially before I stop taking it in about a week and a half. I would probably be ok if I didn't have to work and I've also thought about maybe splitting the wellbutrin if need be when I am at the end of this taper but most likely I will just stop taking it. I know with extended release you can not but from my research it seems 75mg is an instant release that can be cut in half. Has anyone tapered off an antidepressant with this every other day method before? I'm used to gradually tapering off medications so this is a first for me. Though the pristiq I take is at the lowest dose and that's something I'm going to have to take every other day when I'm ready to. So I kind of see this as a challenge to prove to myself that I can get off the pristiq as well, just need to get through this first. Thank you for anyone who took time out of their day to read this, any help is truly appreciated! I already meditate multiple times a day, and exercise everyday so I have that down just have no idea which supplements may help or if that's even possible.
  13. Hello, I have been lurking for a few days on the forum. There is some incredibly useful information here, so thank you to all who have taken the time to share your experience and wisdom. I have been on Cipralex (Lexapro) and Wellbutrin for a few years, and now want to at least reduce them because of increased migraines. I have spoken to my family doctor about this and she does not agree, but did agree to refer me to a neurologist and to a psychiatrist. However, the wait times for appointments are long. I have had to go on medical leave because I am getting 2-4 migraines a week, so I have decided to start tapering one of the antidepressants on my own. (Both Cipralex and Wellbutrin may cause migraines. I am already doing diet and lifestyle changes, but to no avail. I have tried two types of triptans, which did not help, and I would rather take less meds than more. Migraine meds plus antidepressants can lead to serotonin syndrome.) In the past, I have only made changes to medication under the supervision of a doctor, so I am feeling a bit like a renegade right now. I decided to start with the Cipralex. Last night I attempted to take 90% of my regular dose by making a liquid. I found the tablet dissolved quickly enough but it wasn't a true dissolution, and I couldn't keep the particles evenly distributed enough to feel that I got an accurate dose. I will try to get my hands on some of the Ora-Plus. When I reduced the dosage of Cipralex a few years ago (under doctor supervision), I did not taper it and experienced some withdrawal symptoms. I hope to minimize the symptoms this time.
  14. Hi All, I recently stumbled upon this site in hope that it would shed some light on my withdrawal experience. To start, I will give a background on my medication history. I started Lexapro in 2013 and went from 10 mgs to 20mgs. Xanax as needed for panic attacks (which would happen once in a blue moon). This year I dealt with a lot of stress from work and I started having frequent panic attacks and headaches in July/August of 2019. Then in August, I went to the ER for the headaches and enlarged pupil (to rule out stroke, etc. - I have a history of DVT blood clot). Went to my PCP a week later, told him I was worried the Lexapro was giving me the headaches and that I wanted to try something different to help with the anxiety. Knew nothing about weaning off ADs - went down to 10mgs of the Lexapro in a week and then to 0 as per the DR, while adding 150mgs of Welbutrin. I had withdrawal symptoms for about 2-3 weeks, and the Welbutrin was not helping after about a month so I stopped taking it. From there, I could feel my anxiety and some depression creeping back in, but the headaches were gone. I was starting a new project with work in October which is where things dramatically went downhill with my anxiety. I would come home and be so paralyzed with anxiety that I could barely get off the couch. I could barely eat or carry out my daily functions, let alone leave the house. The worst of the symptoms was the morning anxiety. I would wake up feeling very overwhelmed, fidgety, and start immediately feeling nauseous. I’d also feel terrified/fearful for most of the day. The only thing that helps with any of the symptoms is Xanax - I’ll take anywhere from .25mgs to .5mgs, once, usually in the morning/early afternoon. I am also a Type 1 Diabetic and I’m lucky my blood sugars have been okay, but I should be eating more. I’ve lost almost 15 lbs since October. PCP put me on Prozac 6 weeks ago and I was just upped to 40mgs by my Psychiatrist last week. Symptoms have been better - appetite and nausea has been better, but I still am not eating as I should be. Still feeling very fearful for the most part and I’m really scared it’s going to interfere with my job, especially since it gives me most of my anxiety. Started taking 200mgs of Magnesium 2 weeks ago, especially since being in ketosis really depletes your body of it...not sure if it is that or the Prozac but sleep has been better. I’m worried that I’m going to have to depend on the Xanax to get me through most days until I stabilize on the Prozac. I’d like to be able to start yoga/meditation/exercising but I have little motivation to do anything. My family and the friends that I do have have been very supportive, which has been really helpful and reassuring. I also see a therapist who has been trying to give me techniques to help reduce my anxiety. As far as my Psychiatrist, he believes that what I am feeling right now is a return of anxiety and not from withdrawal, which I do not agree with after reading numerous posts on this website. I think most of this is debilitating withdrawal and a small percentage is a return of anxiety. At this point I am looking for any suggestions or support from those who have and are going through similar experiences. It is not easy finding people who are, and talking to those who have never gone through this just don’t understand what it’s like so it’s hard to relate. I’d like to think there is light at the end of the tunnel for me, but it feels like I will never reach that point. And one day I’d like to be off of ADs for good, but right now that doesn’t feel like an option for me...😢
  15. Hi, I was on Effexor for 2.5 years (the last year only on 37.5 mg ) and also combined with Wellbutrin 150mg. I went off both in February 2019 with no taper because I was unaware at all that we could just not stop. There its been been a year of worsening conditions then the ones I even wanted to get off the medication for. I took some Effexor and Wellb a few times during the year, but usually just for a day or two (which I also know now is bad). I really don’t want to go back on meds, but I have sever dry eye, very lethargic, and worst of all a very flat and sad melancholy baseline. For those who were not aware of tapering and have been withdrawing for almost a year, does anyone have recommendations? I have already been eating pretty clean, exercise, and supplement with D, Mag, and Omega, but I basically feel awful every day. Anyone been thru this as well?
  16. Cigarettes at age 11. Alcohol periodically from age 13 to age 30. Valium episodically from age 18 to age 27. I have been on myriad anti-depressants since 1982 for major depression and generalized anxiety. Imipramine, desyrel, ativan. Off drugs from 1984 till 1995. Started Prozac 1995 till 2014 (did well from 1995 to 2011). Tried Wellbutrin, Cymbalta. Abilify and Trintellix from March 2014 till August 8, 2017 (depression free). Had to withdraw due to cervical dystonia and tremors which still persist. Terrible experience withdrawing from Abilify and Trintellix. Started Wellbutrin 150 mg. and Prozac 10 mg. for one week to help with withdrawal. Then increased Wellbutrin to 300 mg. and experienced ringing in ears; stopped the Wellbutrin and increased Prozac to 20 mg. (10 in A.M.; 10 in P.M.) Now on Prozac 20 mg. per day, occasional Propranolol for tremors (doesn't help). I've read that coming off Abilify can take up to 3 months or more, and it has been 2 months so far. I feel like I've spent (wasted) my entire adult life trying to feel better, first by self-medicating, then by psychiatric medicating. I'm 72 years old. I wonder if there is any hope for me.
  17. Hi there, I have been reading quite a few topics on this website, and would like to see if anyone has suggestions for my situation. I was put on effexor and wellbutrin over 5 years ago. I am not exactly sure of the exact time length I have been on it, and what doses I have tried, but the past few years I have been on 150mg of effexor and 150 mg of wellbutrin. My dr and I decided I can come off the effexor on a tapered schedule. Basically I was tapered from 150 to 75 to 37.5 to nothing in just over a month or there abouts. I didnt keep a track of the dates, which I probably should have. The tapering was ok, I didnt really notice anything happening. Then when I went from 37.5 to nothing, it really hit me. I had all the discussed symptoms and was a mess. I think July 25 was my last day on effexor. In August I think I had two or three good days, and I use the term good loosely here. September I had about 10 good days, October, is only at 8 good days so far. These day are not all in a row, they are very sporadic. I recently started a new job, but it only goes for another month. That has me really stressed out, as I have no savings to fall back on and no job lined up yet. My job I am currently at is good though, it has me outside in the forest, getting lots of exercise and lots of fresh air. Since about October 11, I have been having these crazy crying fits. I just cry, and cry. When I am not crying, I feel ok, but then I start crying hours later. I did go to the walk in clinic, as I cannot get into see my fam dr with my work schedule, and the dr at the walk in suggested I try doubling my wellbutrin either every day, or I could double it up every second day. He said this will still take a month before I start feeling any better, if I do. This morning, out of desperation, I took a second pill and I will continue with this, unless someone has another suggestion... Does anyone have any experience with this? When I have a good day, I still have a tightness in my chest, and I know I am so close to tears, but I am able to ward them off. I find I have to keep myself super busy to not cry, or think, as htinking leads to tears. Today is another rough day, lots of crying already. I do not want to go back on effexor, as my mind has never felt so crisp and clear. I feel unfogged and alert, I do not remember ever feeling like this. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.
  18. Hi, I'm new to this website. I have been trying to withdraw from antidepressants for about 18 months. When I started by withdrawal, I was taking 20 mg of Prozac, 300 mg of Wellbutrin (to treat side effects of prozac), and 100 mg of Trazadone. A year ago, I told my doctor I wanted to get off my medications because they were not helping and I was feeling increasingly fatigued. She gave me a taper scheduled that had me off the drugs within 2 months. I suffered terribly with anxiety, insomnia, and the worst depression I ever experienced. After trying to persevere, I eventually went back on 10 mg of Prozac and 50 mg of Trazadone to relieve the anxiety and allow me to sleep. Having reduced my dosages and completely eliminated Wellbutrin, I felt better and had more energy than when I was taking the higher doses. Lab tests ordered by a functional medicine doctor revealed that I many nutritional deficiencies despite my healthy diet. She prescribed supplements, including magnesium, fish oil (DHA and EPA), B vitamins, glutathione, and vitamin C. My energy and strength increased and I was able to begin an exercise program. Long story short, because I was feeling better, I began to taper the remainder of my drugs. I am now down to 25 mg of Trazadone and 8 mg of liquid Prozac. I have been taking 25 mg of Trazadone for over 6 months and only just started weaning off the Prozac. Since I reduced Prozac from 10 mg to 8 mg, I have felt fine except for insomnia. I joined this forum because I want to succeed with stopping the drugs for good this time. Thank you so much for this forum and the information you have provided. Past Medications: Paxil 25 mg 2010-June 2012 Prozac 20 mg January 2013 Wellbutrin 300 mg January 2013 Trazadone 100 mg January 2013 Current Medications: Prozac 8 mg Trazadone 25 mg
  19. Tapered from 15mg Lexapro starting in May 2019, completed withdrawal from that in September 2019, then began withdrawal from 300 mg Welbutrin and now down to less than 100mg. No zaps or other acute symptoms at all, but some GI pain I'm managing with an integrative wellness doc with the object of regenerating the gut biome to normal/optimal. Some days I'm OK, but more often quite lately am super irritable and depressed -- much moreso than when I first started this stuff 30 years ago. Does this sound like withdrawal or relapse? I hate the idea of going back on this stuff and willing to stay the course but would love some advice on how long it might be before I feel OK. THANKS!
  20. Alexi319

    Alexi319

    Hello! Glad this resource exists. I am a 29 y/o female. I have a stable job I’ve held for the last 7 years. Very health conscious. Work hard on self care, mindfulness, meditation, therapy, etc. I have complex trauma, as many people do, that I’m currently working through with my therapist. I was an anxious child. I had intense separation anxiety, panic attacks, stomach aches. I was in talk therapy from the age of 8 to about 13-14. I struggled with paranoia and the fear of people not liking me, talking about me when they really weren’t, etc. I wasn’t put on medication until my freshman year of college. I went to my GP complaining of issues concentrating, brain fog, problems with visually focusing and anxiety. Some depressive episodes as well of feeling very down. Started on Celexa for “imbalanced brain chemistry”. Lol. Stayed on that for about a year, didn’t feel a significant effect. More life events later, was put on lexapro. Had issues with substance abuse and went to treatment for a catatonic depressive episode with suicidal ideation. Was put on Zoloft in treatment. Terrible drug. Lost libido, felt like a zombie, gained weight. 300 mg/gabapentin 3 times per day was added to the mix after a couple of months. Stayed on gabapentin for about 6 months then tapered off - worst withdrawals ever. Then another GP put me on Prozac (10 mg) and Wellbutrin 150mg XR. I have been on that combo for about 1.5 years now. Currently I am experiencing high anxiety, paranoia, fear, irritability and rage in some instances. Surprisingly, no insomnia. I feel like I am constantly preoccupied. It won’t stop. When I asked my GP about getting off of the Prozac, he told me to stop taking it for a couple of days and see how I felt. I’m sorry, that sounds like a TERRIBLE IDEA. I am struggling. I can’t be present for life. I would like to eventually be off both of these drugs, but definitely Prozac first. Thanks for listening. 2011-2012 - 20 mg/Celexa. No tapering. 2013 - 2014 - 20 mg/Lexapro. No tapering. 2016 - 2017 - 20 mg/Zoloft - 2 months. Added 300mg/gabapentin 3x per day in addition to the Zoloft. 2018-tapered off of gabapentin. Then changed to 10 mg/Prozac and 150 mg/Wellbutrin XR. Tapered off of Zoloft. 2019 - still currently taking 10mg/Prozac and 150 mg/Wellbutrin XR.
  21. Hi all. Found this site a few months ago. I am beginning to attempt getting off ADs and Benzo. I have been taking antidepressants for 17 years. I am 44. I do not work outside the home. My goal is to incorporate healthy activities (suggestions please) to help lessen the withdrawal symptoms. I am realistic about the amount of time it will take and hope everyone here can be a support system. I am married. Hubby is supportive, but doesn't really understand what is going with my body. I have really bad health anxiety currently. I was diagnosed with bipolar about 5 years ago and was put on lamictal 200mg. Wellbutrin was added shortly after. I tapered of Zoloft over about 18 months. I had my first anxiety attack exactly 2 weeks after the last dose. So we decided to stay in 25 mg. which held off the anxiety attacks since then. About 8 months ago I started having increased anxiety along with some peri menopausal symptoms. Then the health anxiety followed, probably because of all the weird symptoms I was having. I went up to 50mg on the Zoloft and taking Ativan to help me sleep. I realized I was building a tolerance to it, so I weaned myself back off and was doing fine. Then the cycle started again. New symptom (breast pain this time), then the health anxiety and back on Ativan. I only take .125mg at a time. If I don't feel much relief in about 30 minutes, I will take another one. That usually does it. Then I stop when I feel better. However a couple of weeks ago, I noticed I was having muscle twitches and jerks. Don't google that!! Now looking back I think they may be related to stopping the Ativan after taking it for several days. I really don't know. So I decided today to take a dose to see if it settles down over the next few days and go from there. 3 days ago I started a taper on the Wellbutrin 150 mg xl. My doctor wrote prescription for 100mg sr tabs...and I started taking 75 in the morning and 50 in the afternoon. I am hoping this won't be too fast, but I am going to try it. I also started having stomach upset a couple of days ago with some diarrhea today. Very unusual for me. Is that possibly Ativan w/d? Thank everyone. Not sure how to add signature. Attach a file maybe?
  22. Hi friends! I am a 24 year old male. I had been using Venlafaxine XR 225mg capsules for around a year and a half ( July 2017- April 2019). I'd started Venlafaxine for my chronic fatigue which was thought to be depression (it most probably was). Other drugs I used: -Pre Workouts(PW): Mix of Caffeine, PEAs, and a variety of nootropics. I used these almost daily to try to stay awake. They helped me enormously with school and social life; to the point that I got psychologically addicted. -Modafinil(rarely): Best antidepressant I've ever felt in my life when it was combined with the Venlafaxine. Not stimulating like the PWs, just made me feel completely normal. - 4 LSD trips over 1 year In March of this year I had decided that the Venlafaxine had not been having any major positive effects and that I was better off stopping it. Together with my psychiatrist we decided to taper off of it. At the time I didn't know about the importance of proper tapering and neither does my psyhiatrist. Her plan consisted of reducing to 150mg for 2 weeks and then 75mg for another two, after which I went down to 0. I had the classical 1-2 weeks of acute withdrawal with the brain zaps, nausea, depersonalisation, derealisation, extreme depression and anxiety etc. Followed by this I went through about 2 weeks of what I would consider complete normality and I thought I was out of the woods. Following those 2 weeks it got really bad. I got severe parestethias, numbness, extreme fatigue, anxiety, lack of concentration. Over a period of 1 month I failed 3 exams in med school. I was trying to keep myself focused and alert with the PWs and Modafinil but I seemed to be hyper-reactive to them. Sometimes they worked really well but sometimes they gave me this intense head pressure where I could theoretically see but it was more like a brain and "eye" fog. Before the withdrawal, and before every taking Venlafaxine, my tiredness, or low mood, or anxiety could be temporarily fixed by taking PW. I was not getting any of the functional use anymore. Since then, I've been getting waves of this sort of state, with waves of feeling "better", but I haven't felt close to how I used to feel on Venlafaxine since, or even before starting Venlafaxine. In other words I'm doing worse now than before starting the VF. In the worst parts of the wave I can't even take caffeine anymore without getting head pressure and a sense of overstimulation. Before all this it was like I didn't even have a threshold for how high I could go with stimulants without adverse effects, but now I take 1/4-1/8 of what I used to, and even that's risky. I'm not looking for the "rush" again, I'm just trying to be as transparent as possible with how my body reacts. For my last exam in July, I had a 3 week period where I took Wellbutrin IR 150mg so I wouldn't fail again. It seemed to help bring me a bit closer to stability, but again nothing like before. On Jul 5th I quit Wellbutrin cold turkey. As far as I can tell I've had no withdrawal symptoms at all. Nowadays I try maintaining stability by Meditating, taking Mg Glycinate( 400 - 800 mg ) and Fish Oil. I've also had another 2 LSD trips and one Mushroom trip. All of these have helped me with accepting my symptoms and powering through the day. I'm still taking low doses of PW to get any sort of semblance of energy and focus through the day. However, I'd ideally like to reinstate VF so I can taper properly and be stable. These symptoms are very disruptive and I'd love to go back to any semblance of my old stable self. Would it still make sense for me to try reinstating something like 37.5mg or 75mg Venlafaxine now and starting tapering? Is my only other option waiting it out? Sorry for the long block of text. Any advice is appreciated.
  23. Hello, I ve been attempting to discontinue ssri's for quite some time with mixed results. Currently reduced my celaxa from 2.6 to 2.4. My brain isnt really liking it. Judging from past experience its not that severe. But severe is relative. It doesnt really feel good and can be quite frightening at times, increased depression, apathy and a little/lot of fear. I expected it to be a little easier judging from my last cut in Oct. 2013. Its frustrating that such a small reduction can have such a pronounced effect. My current meds are listed in my sig. Hopefully, with some help I ll be able to be med free one of these days. I already know its a long process. Me...
  24. TNnightowl

    TNnightowl

    Hi there, everyone. I have been hanging around this site for a few weeks now, and I've discovered so much valuable, helpful information. Actually putting myself out there is a big step for me, but I am convinced that this is where I belong. I have recently made the decision, after much research & thoughtful/prayerful consideration, to come off all the psych meds I am taking. I understand this will take time, but I'm in it for the long haul. So much of what I have learned over the past few weeks, and much of it from this site, is terrifying...and very much an eye-opener. I was first prescribed antidepressants back in 1989, and I may not be able to recall all the different meds I've taken since then nor the exact time frames taking each one. I will try to be as accurate as possible. Major Depression 1989, hospitalized for 22 days Amitriptyline (strength/dosage ?) Can't recall the anti-anxiety med prescribed. Maybe Xanax. Since that time I have been prescribed numerous antidepressants & anti-anxiety meds over the years. I am unable to be more specific than to name a few that I can recall. Time frames are impossible to recall as well. Lexapro Xanax Paxil I was med-free for a few years and functioned very well...even as a single mom of three very active boys. Then, approximately 10 yrs. ago I went down into that pit of depression again. Began antidepressants again and have been on them ever since. About 5-6 years ago, I resigned myself that I would need these meds for the rest of my life. I have lived in my own little world, functioning, but I have realized I want my life back. Currently: Sertraline (generic Zoloft) 100mg. 2 X a day Bupropn (gen. Wellbutrin) HCL 150mg. XL 1 X a day Lorazepam (gen. Ativan) 1mg. 1/2 - 1 tablet up to twice daily as needed. Have been taking a whole tablet before bed each night for about a year. As of 4 weeks ago, I am in the process of tapering and will begin tonight with a nightly dose of 1/2 tablet. (Was taking this dosage until a major event in my life about a year ago, then I began with one whole tablet at bedtime.) I have a pill cutter and have tapered slowly. I intend to hold it at this dosage until I have my med check appt next month, then go from there. Abilify 5mg. (on and off this one for about 3 years at different strengths, 5mg. being the highest) Started tapering off about 3 months ago but as I discovered on this site, taper wasn't slow enough. Experienced nightmarish w/d symptoms for 2-3 weeks, then began slowly to feel better. Symptoms have since subsided...ups and downs, though, over a few weeks. Will NEVER put this poison in my body again! I am making changes in my diet, exercising, and being mindful of & rerouting my thought patterns...and socializing more, which is very difficult for me. My grown sons & daughters-in-law, brothers & sis-in-law, and a couple close friends are aware of my goals. They are all very supportive and are "there" for me...24/7. This is very comforting to me. I have my faith, and I have a wonderful therapist who has been & is extremely helpful to me and is supportive of my efforts to become psych meds-free. I am very thankful to have found this site. Reading others' experiences helped me to survive the w/d symptoms after tapering off Abilify. So thank you to all who share here!
  25. So I have been a member of this cite since i started my taper in May of 2018. Almost 6 years ago (age 18) I went into a deep depression from panic attacks that were induced by weed. The anxiety from that was so unbearable. I was in fear of everything. felt like i lost control of my body and my mind! Hid under my covers praying that it would all end. A year into not being functional, dropping out of college, and having suicidal thoughts I got placed on an SSRI along with Xanax (as needed). At the age of 19 I was on medication for my anxiety and got sober after getting out of a treatment center (forced upon my parents since i didn't stop smoking pot and drinking). I remember trying so my medications, a lot of them not on my signature because i forgot or got off of them easily with a switch to another medication. It started with one SSRI! then i started to have side effects. the main side effect was low sex drive, ED, and no orgasms. I couldnt have that being a young adult male. NO THANK YOU. so my psych added Remeron to the mix. Dont know why? probably because it has less sexual side effects, and was good for sleep. Remeron, though came with a handful of side effects too. GREAT! started with crazy tiredness. I remember starting this stuff and sleeping 16 hrs a day because i was so knocked out. I also couldnt stop eating carbs and sweets. I little felt like i was high with the munchies without the paranoia of being high. Kind of awesome until the weight gain started to come into play. Im a Fitness Trainer and very cautious with my weight and what i put into my mouth. So i started to really hate that all i was eating were sweets an hr before bed, felt sugar hangover and literally couldnt stop munching!!! The only thing I loved about Remeron was it put me to sleep fast. SO after I have been on Lexapro and Remeron, my psych added Wellbutrin to counteract the side effects of Remeron. Great... So now, somehow i went from 1 to now being on 3, WTF? I stayed on this combination of meds for a couple of months until I said "I quit, i dont want to do this anymore". What really turned my opinion, a couple of things that came into my life that opened my mind to new possibilities: #1 I told myself I live to much of a healthy lifestyle to be on all these meds. I workout everyday, I eat extremely healthy with a side of fun, I'm sober, etc. #2 I started to read literature about SSRI and psych meds. (Dr. Joe Dispenza's You are the placebo , MAD in America Anatomy of an Epidemic, Lost Connections) This really got my motivated to look at my life and see what action i could take. I didnt want to become dependent on medication for the rest of my life, I wanted to at least try to come off of this stuff. #3 And this PAGE!!!! Reading a lot of people's success stories and seeing what people were going through, I could relate. On May 20th 2018, I started my taper. my plan was to go the 10% taper a month, alternating between each medication. because I wanted to equally reduce all three as i went through my taper instead of doing one drug at a time, (Dont know if that was the best decision but it has worked so far) The taper has gone pretty well, Im actually impressed and proud of myself for taking this journey and getting through the problems with tapering so far. I have had all the WDnormal symptoms. some of them manage others not quite so much. I think some of my worse symptoms have been the psyhological symptoms. I was in relationship before the start of my taper, I was so sick of not being able to perform in bed that i decided to taper. Well during my taper my emotions have been all over the place! have you had this problem? It scares me so much, i scared im bipolar or crazy, i just try to keep telling myself its the taper. I had to end that relationship, the stress of the relationship was hurting me. I have thoughts to this day about what if i just stayed on the medication? and dealt with the side effects, could the emotions have not gotten so out of control for me to break up with her? Who knows, All i know is that this is something that i need to do for ME and my life (To try and come off of these medications). So its September 21st 2019, and im now on: Lexapro 2.2mg (started 10mg) Remeron 9mg (started 22.5mg) Wellbutrin SR 0mg (started 250mg) Im taking a break from tapering at the moment, because honestly im overwhelmed with the taper and im in fear that my panic is coming back because i have had a couple of small panic attacks that have hit. Im praying that its just the medication adjusting, and not my passed coming to haunt me again. Its very concerning!!! Would love to hear if you have had thoughts of this? I will say that though even so the anxiety and panic has been a little high, i also have had great moments of clarity and connection, sometimes tears or joy. Also I feel like im digging up emotions that were trapped when the medication was numbing me. Crying a lot, don't really care if its bad or not, just lots of emotions. I so badly do not want to be depressed, or have anxiety. But i guess those are natural things in life that we all go through and need to combat. This forum has helped me alot more times when i'm down and hopeless and scared that i won't be able to live a drug free life. I'm scared, I know God is telling me to be strong and show bravery, and Im doing but its just hard guys, do you ever feel like this? My next step: is to stay stabilized on the above dosages for a couple of months and see if my symptoms stay the same or get a little better hopefully. All the reasons i had for wanting to get off the medication (Sexual dysfunction, numbness, weight, excessive eating, to tired, lack of emotion, unempathetic) those have all really gone down as i have lowered the dosages, Which is a really good thing! Im grateful for that! So there is no rush to get off these medications at the moment, i dont want to be not functional, because i was there 6 years ago and it was the worst place to be. Thank you for taking the time to read my intro! I hope i get some positive words from you guys right now because honestly i need hope . Thank you i Dont even know you put i feel you and i can say i love you guys, i see, i hear, i feel your struggles, but i also see feel and hear all your little wins! Keep it up! One day ill be a success story.
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