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Hello everyone. I’ve been lurking around this site since 2015 when my life came crashing down. I was close to joining last year (2019) to post a success story but unfortunately I am now here looking for some answers and help. Here is my history: 2007 - 2015 Zoloft 50mg for mild anxiety 2015 - ct. severe symptoms 6 weeks later reinstated, stabilized, began slow taper 2015 -2017 slow taper with window and wave patterns of stabilization Completed taper in March 2017 After completing my taper I began to slowly improve until tinnitus struck in May of 2017. Tinnitus became the center of my life for the next year and a half. It was all I could think about. Looking back at it now I realize it bothered me so much because I was still in withdrawal and the severity of the tinnitus at the time was actually a withdrawal symptom. By the end of 2018 I was still improving and 2019 I felt I was recovered. I stopped thinking about withdrawal. This is where I started making my regretful mistakes. I began a new stressful job in September of 2019. From the very start of the job my nervous system was telling me no but I didn’t listen, I kept pushing forward. By February I started to feel a little down so I tried taking St. John’s wort. Took it for two days and stopped because I thought I was having a bad reaction. Still to this day don’t know if I had a bad reaction or if I would have started feeling that way anyways. But that was the first taste of withdrawal again since my recovery. I “recovered” from that, kept my job and kept pushing forward. Had a few decent months but then around July - August began to feel off, a weird type of depression that is hard to explain began to creep in, then in mid October things took a nose dive. I became severely depressed, anxious, and began losing sleep. It felt like the depression I had during withdrawal, it felt chemical. I have had a few days since then where symptoms seem to just instantly disappear for a few hours to a day then just as quickly come back. Almost like a quick window/wave period. It feels different though, it doesn’t feel like it did during withdrawal, there no feel good manic stage. I’m currently in a deep state of depression which is probably being exacerbated from being sick with covid for the past 3 days. I feel completely hopeless and have so much regret for throwing my recovery away. So I guess I’m here looking for some positive vibes or some reassurance that this is a temporary setback because at this point I really don’t know what is going on. My mind is telling me “this is the new you”. Are setbacks like this common this far out? Does anyone know of anyone who had similar setbacks and gone on to recover? Is this withdrawal or could this be a new condition? Please, no stories of anyone suffering 5 years later from a setback. Just too much to hear right now. Thank you