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  1. Hello guys, I'm Giuseppe from Italy. I've stumbled upon your website when looking for some help with the withdrwal sindrome that I'm experiencing in this period. I've finished tapering the Citalopram last week and now I feel some side effects (mostly dizziness). Just wonder if somebody is experiencing the same and how he/she is coping with that. Thanks to anybody who would like to give me some advices. best to all, Giuseppe
  2. Hi everyone, I had a manic episode which was induced by bad mistakes involving alcohol and cocaine. I was still drug when I was sectioned and given a cocktail of pills. I was going through a really testing stage in my life where I had discovered my partner might have been cheating on me. This lead me down spiral path which and I stupidly took coke and alcohol. It was the first and last time ever. By making this horrible mistake I ended up doing a weekend in the mental health ward. Upon release i was prescribed respiridone which i stopped after two weeks as i got an allergic reaction in the form of a rash. Rather than realising my manic episode was a one off (I've never had them in my life before and was otherwise healthy) I was thrown in to the dark murky waters of psychiatry. In hind sight I wished I had been more vigilant as to what they were saying and prescribing. The mental health ward made me believe i was bipolar even though my episode had been drug and drink induced and led me to believe i had no choice in the matter but to take the medicines they suggested. As i wasnt sleeping well, this was used against me and i was prescribed 10mg olamzapine to be taken at 2.5mg at 9am, 2.5mg 3pm, and 5mg at 7pm. At first it felt great being able to sleep so much as I had always been a light sleeper and didnt question the effects this drug would have on me. So I took them for 5 months but ended up reducing the dosage to 7.5mg as I was feeling so tired and groggy through out the day which was starting to effect my duties around the house and my own self care. My psychiatrist was a horrible, condescending and argumentative woman who kept saying i had a mental illness and likely needed olamzapine for up to 2 years or for life. I questioned their diagnosis several times as i know my own bad choices prior had led me to having my break down. They were uninterested in any opinion or my thoughts and kept writing me off. After 5 months on olamzapine my periods stopped, and this worried me but again i was told olamzapine doesnt have this effect. I also developed dry eyes or bleptharitus. Previously to taking this med i had never had these issues. Each time I addressed my concerns they were dismissed and i was put in a position where my psychiatrist even said 'i have a medical degree, i know what im talking about and you lack this'. I was shocked, she was so cold hearted and made me feel stupid for raising my concerns. I decided that i didnt need these meds interferring in my body any longer and quit them cold turkey at 7.5mg. For 3 weeks i suffered from insomnia and even after i told the community nurse i had stopped them i wasnt given any information that this could be dangerous or have lasting effects. All they kept asking was if i was having racing thoughts. I'd never had racing thoughts prior to my melt down, they were only interested in that because apparently if i was it was a return of mental health symptoms? Not one bit of advice was given on what to expect from stopping the med or that the insomnia was part of withdrawl. After 3/4 weeks of insomnia which was causing me to feel severely low i started olamzapine again but at 5mg at night. It took my nearest and dearest to recognise since i went on these meds i had changed dramatically. All the zest for life was gone, i was a walking zombie and often in bed by 8pm. I avoided any social gatherings, didnt enjoy tv or reading any more. These meds were destroying my outlook on life. So after 3 weeks off 5mg i attempted again to stop. Again i informed the psychiatrist who had also made me try lamotragine & zopiclone during these months. She seemed to throw a pill at any issues i raised whilst i was on olamzapine. Anyway and she had a look of amusement on her face and said fine try it. Again i wasnt told i would need to taper or that there would be any withdrawl effects. I ended up with severe muscular pain in my arms and legs, i would get pins and needles when resting flat on my back, i couldnt eat, i constantly felt sick and had extreme anxiety where every few days i thought i was going to die or that i had numerous of illnesses as i never knew it could be the withdrawl from olamzapine. I ended up in hospital twice for the anxiety and the paramedics just thought i was faking my symptoms because of the medical diagnosis that i was mentally unwell. I was treated like dirt once they saw that on my file. I was told my symptoms above were mental health issues which i disputed heavily. I wasnt showering, eating, sleeping, in constant pain. This took an effect on my mental health and i started feeling so angry towards the mental health team who had been so quick to get me on their choice of poison. I felt suicidal several times, begged for God to take me as i couldnt live this way and become a social recluse compared to the great life i had before. Sitting at my daughters friends birthday party i felt so depleted and jealous of everyone enjoying their lives. I even said to my partner to divorce me and find a new wife as i didnt think i was going to survive. Then he said 'youve come off these meds to fast you need to reduce them first'. In the 6/7 months on these my mind had become so foggy and the trust i had put in to the health care system that i didnt research any of the drugs they prescribed. Had i done that first i wouldnt have felt this awful way which can only be described to a living hell. After this epiphany i started researching online, i think ive read every story, article, journal, forums to do with olamzapine and realised i wasnt alone in this struggle. I self educated myself and realised doing the cold turkey reduction had bought on the severe withdrawl effects. I spent hours reading about tapering methods, other peoples stories and when i confronted my psychiatrist she denied all of the many hundreds or thousands of people going through withdrawl. It was the last time i spoke to her as the debate became so heated as she kept speaking over me. I had patiently put up with her demoralizing character for months and lost all trust and respect for psychiatry. The nurse was just as brain washed and seemed clueless and tapering and gave me the advice to stay on 5mg for 9 days, then 2.5mg for 9 days then to stop. I felt like i had to educate her as she really didnt have knowledge or empathy regarding the situation. I followed her NHS advice, once i got to 2.5mg i cut the tablets in half and took this for 9 days. After that i quatered them and took them for another 9 days. The pills are difficult to cut so its hard to have an accurate measurement of my last week on olamzapine. In the drop down in dosages to half and quater a pill i started getting really bad anxiety. I had never suffered anxiety in my life. I felt like i couldnt breath, i was waking up abruptly in fight or flight mode at 6am every morning. The first week off i felt like a walking disaster. Any little situation made my anxiety heightened. Knowing the research id done i was mentally more prepared the third time to encounter these situations. I just wanted time to pass as quickly as possible to get my old brain and body back. My appetite became so poor i was often just eating a few nuts a day as i felt sick and weak. After a week off the olamzapine the induced anxiety became so much i made a docs appointment with my regular GP who didnt judge me when i told him openly and honestly about my stupid mistake on drugs and drink and he believed it was withdrawl effects. He was reluctant to prescribe anything for sleep as he didnt want me facing another problem and gave me propanalol, a beta blocker which slows the heart rate down. He said i could take these as when required for the anxiety and that they didnt work on the brain the way antipsychotic do. I took 3 at 10mg over the space of a few days in the morning when i felt awful and couldnt shake the anxiety off. They made me feel weird. So ive decided not to take them anymore. I quit all sugary foods, drinks and started taking magnesium, vit d, hemp oil capsules and smoking cbd. My withdrawl this time isnt as bad as it was the first two times. Ive been trying to eat as healthy as possible, taking walks with my daughter and to be patient with the process. I understand it can take time to recover. By cutting out the rubbish food i have felt a difference, my sleep is getting better but it takes time. Going to try detox salt baths and i also started drinking hot water, lemon and honey first thing in the morning which calms my anxiety. Its day 11 off the olamzapine and even though my head and heart has been tested i wont let this bad episode in my life dictate me any further. Some days are so challenging, my house which used to be pristine is a mess. I dont have the drive to do the things i used to in life. But i am now aware these things will heal and with the support of my family and a cleaner diet i will heal.
  3. This is the second time I have tried to reduce my reliance on citalopram and I have sought more help this time. I am also a recovering alcoholic with 23 years sobriety and drugs and withdtawls are the bane of my life. Over the last 2months I have tapered from 30mg down to 10 mg a day. Doing 20 one day and 10 the next seemed to be ok, but been on 10mg for 5 days and the symptoms have got worse, headaches and light heads seem the norm now and i would appreciate any feedback on reducing further or taking a slightly higher dose. I also take BP controlling tablets.
  4. Twenty years ago this fall, I started taking paxil. I was also prescribed clonazapam, and used that for a while: years. But paxil has been my darling. There every day for me in its pink pantsuit, waiting with its special odor and taste "the pink pill" after 20years, is now "the red pill". Much more awake, married (stable), two kids, I don't want to mess a good thing up (stable). And yet (stable), I would like to know of my dear brain's inherent capacity (stable) and its elasticity. I wonder (stable) of who I am now. I am no longer the 25 year old "kid" who was looking for a way to cope with the life she had created. I've learned to more than cope. I've learned to thrive. Is paxil (stable) part of that? If we part ways (stable), will I be me?
  5. Rayh

    Rayh

    Hello! I have been on Cymbalta for several years now, was taking 50mg daily. over the last 6 months, with my doctors help, I’ve weaned down to the lowest dosage, which is 20mg capsule. looking to hear how others have gotten off this horrible medication. Thanks in advance!
  6. Hi there, these are some of the details, and I promise it has a good ending: I have a prolactinoma (period stopped, hormones were off) so the endocrinologist gave me bromocriptine to shrink the tumor so I could get the period back and get pregnant. I took it for about 10 months and he said once I got pregnant to just go cold turkey with the meds. So I did and experienced a very mild withdrawl (though I didn't know that's what it was at the time) and about a year and a half after I gave birth I had my gall bladder removed. Gall bladders have a lot to do with breaking down things you ingest. Well, I took one pill, one tiny little bromocriptine pill because the doctor said I should just take bromocriptine forever, and I think it was the fact that I no longer had a gall bladder or that I had had a previous reaction to an SSRI, but I here are the details: Reaction/Withdrawl to Zoloft (sertraline) July 2016 was onset - palpitations, sinus issues, constant panic, paranoia, vertigo, fatigue, the shocks in the head - lasted full-strength for about 6 weeks and then started to calm down slowly - 3 month after onset I was kind of emotionally and psychologically tired but the symptoms were gone and I was able to drink alcohol and coffee again Reaction/Withdrawl to Bromocriptine (dopamine agonist) January 2017 was onset - sinus issues, constant panic, paranoia, vertigo, fatigue, depersonalizationm, extreme tinitus, loss of concentration, burning scalp, major brain fog - these symptoms all lasted full force for about 6 months. Then it began to get better and slowly got better for about a year and a bit. Then finally, at about 20 months after onset the horrific brain fog finally went away - exactly 2 years after onset I still have tinitus now and then and I have some residual anxiety-related issues, as well as PTSD from the whole situation, but I can enjoy my life again. I still can't drink more than a glass of wine with dinner, or have any caffeine, but I'm myself again. I came back on here because I want all of you to know that it's a waiting game. I'll admit there were a couple of months during the cold, harsh, dark Canadian winter (at 12 months after onset) where I wondered whether I had it in me to keep fighting, but I did keep fighting, and it got better. I can look at the sun again, feel sunshine and like it, I can feel happiness without really focusing on trying to feel it, the horrible brain fog and insomnia that plagued my life are basically gone. I can drive around again. If I lose sleep, it's no big deal. I can only describe those 2 years, the worst 2 years of my life, as the feeling of all of the bad things that have ever happened to me, but instead of them happening over 30-something years, being multiplied by 2 and rolled into 2 years. But it gets better. Things I did to help me cope: - I got as much fresh air as I could - I went out and did stuff even if it hurt. Now, I can't remember the pain of it all, but I do have nice memories of things I did with people. Nearly drove me insane but I did it - guzzled night time tea every two hours to keep the panic down - along with the tea took Holy Basil caps - along with those took L-Theanine tablets, those were amazing. I used to down them like mentos. Truly helpful. - when the night-time tea started making me feel bad I switched to Chamomille - got as much excersize as I could; you have to sweat - read success stories; you have to keep your hope alive - stay active; the withdrawl is going to be there no matter what you do Something that helped me a lot was that I wrote a novel. I got some serious flow out of that, so my suggestion is to find something you love that is work but is also enjoyable, because at some point you're going to crawl out of the haze and I can tell you that it feels good to have something to show for all the pain you went through. It will feel like a lifetime will go by before you are through this, but you will get through it, and it will feel amazing. All the posts that talked about bromocriptine withdrawl said it was 2 years from onset to full recovery, and that has been the case with me too. Not 100% recovered yet, at 24 months, but pretty dang close. So, if that's what you took, then yah, at 20/21 months I was feeling like it was never going to end but then all of a sudden the fog finally lifted and I could experience happiness the way I used to and it was an incredible feeling. I even went to a concert and was totally fine with the noise. Anyways, all the best to any readers out there, and don't lose hope.
  7. I was referred here by my therapist after voicing concerns when my general physician put my on venflaxine, the generic for effexor, about a month ago because of my anxiety. Due to my history with SSRIs (below), she wanted to put me on something different, and put me on this SNRI, and the effect was almost immediate. I am on cloud nine every day, have become more extroverted, more confident, happy about everything, full of love and excitement for the world. Honestly its was wonderful, it was like a weight was lifted from me, and suddenly I was free of the anxiety and depression that had been weighing me down for years. I am 21 years old, and I have been dealing with terrible mental health symptoms since I was 14, so having this relief felt like Heaven. But it isn't real. Its unsustainable. And I understand now that coming down from cloud nine is going to feel like Hell. I am on 37.5 mg two times a day, and one day I missed a dose, as happens sometimes, and everything became dark. There was no happiness in anything. Everything was terrible. The weirdest was that was like someone had stuffed cotton balls in my head, even for three days after I continued doses as normal. I was cautious starting this antidepressent, because I have had a bad history with them, and I hate the idea of becoming dependent on a drug. In the fall of 2017 a psychiatrist (who I no longer see after it was revealed he liked to experiment on his patients) started me on lexapro, and after about a month of really bad symptoms he weaned me off and got me on paroxitene. I never finished my perscription, and must have just quit taking them (don't really remember), but I remember having terrible paranoia/anxiety/weight gain while taking the drug. Now with venflaxine, I don't know why I started, but I want off before its too late. I am terrified. I am terrified of throwing myself back into the anxiety and depression that has plagued me for years, but I know I deserve to get better without this drug making me high. I am terrified of the withdrawal effects, because after missing a dose I am thrown off and basically out of commission (paranoid, cotton ball in head feeling, nothing seems to make sense) for days, and I am currently in school studying engineering, which requires I be on top of things every day. I don't know what to do, or how to escape this drug. I need advice. I am scared, because this drug has shifted my entire reality, and I know that shifting things back is going to be horrible. I need advice. How do I get myself off this drug, without completely sabotaging my life, before it is too late?
  8. Hello, my name is Danielle. I am new to this site, but have been reading it for quite some time now. My parents put me on effexor xr when I was 6 years old for severe anxiety and childhood phobias. It worked great for years. I had very little side effects and life was hunky dory. I am now 24 years old and the medication is no longer working. I stupidly tried to come off of the Effexor over the coarse of 3 months under directions from my psychiatrist. Obviously, I crashed and I have been desperately trying to get my life back for the last 10 months. During those months, I was under the impression that I was ‘very ill’ and a ‘special case’ based on the severity of my symptoms, but now I am realizing what has happened to me is not my original illness resurfacing, but the effects of the discontinuation of the medication. I’m an RN and have been out of work for the last 6 months. I have read stories on here of people eventually recovering from ssri and snri withdrawl, but was wondering if anyone has any experience or knows of anyone who was prescribed one of these drugs as a child. Is there hope for me or will I have to live with the consequences of my parents decision for the rest of my life? Will these dehabilitating symptoms ever go away or are my receptors f***ed for life?
  9. Hi there, I am glad that I found this forum and as I am at a very desperate state in my life right now - I am glad that I can find some people relating to my topic. I have first been prescribed Cipralex 5 mg about 10 years ago, when I was 20. I changed from high school to university and started having panic attacks from time to time and a very weird way of feeling myself (like being in a vacuum). Looking back, it was not THAT horrific but a general practitioner prescribed it to me after having a 10 minute-chat with me. I didn´t have any idea what antidepressants were back then - also he did not tell me anything about it. So I took it. I must say that - whether it was placebo or not - it helped. So I got off them (5mg, very small dose). 2 years later I had a similar phase, already working at an agency where I experienced panic attacks and felt very anxious in general. So I thought to myself: Hey that stuff worked the first time - I´ll take that again. I don´t really know if it did anything for me this time because I also quit my job and took a long vacation - I guess that would have done it as well. After maybe a little less than a year I quit again - this time it seemed harder. I always tapered - even with this little dosage. When I quit- the first time in my life ever, I had sort of depressive phases. But it went away. Then again some years later I had a very stressfull time in my life and a trigger-event that got me really freaked out and depression kicked in ...this time I did not want to start medication again but I could not see another way. thankfully shortly after I found my coaching technique that reeeallyyy helped a lot, did some family constellations and really started to understand the whole reason WHY I was dealing with all those problems. I understand now and I don´t feel crazy anymore for having experienced what I have experienced. But okay. So at the maximum I took 10 mg of Cipralex ( i always refused the neurologists wish of taking more and more) because I did not feel that the antidepressants helped. While taking 10 mg I still had very depressive phases, so I thought: Okay, if I take more, will it get better or will I just be damaging my body more and more? I continued working with my coach, working on myself, getting to know myseld and really digging into the hurtful past and reasons. This helped A LOT and was the only reason I felt better. So soon I reduced again to 5mg ( in steps) Eeeevery time I reduced my dose I got a depressive phase following, about 3 weeks later that would last around a month. Including sweating a lot, feeling like having a feaver, being depressed,feeling anxious, feeling like I can´t go to training, feeling weak, etc. but I always got better again. So I did this really slowly..always allowing my body to adjust to the next step. In late August (2015) i took my last „powder 0,000xx mg“ and boom...after 3 weeks I started feeling HORRIBLE. ABSOLUTELY HORRIBLE! I had troubles I never had before (or still have) lik e being totally paranoid, feeling completely deprersonalzed, having terrible brainfog, headaches, ...all that in addition to having all the old **** I am used to when having a down. So for 2 months I felt horrible, then it got a lot better for month, now it is completely terrible again since mid-december. I AM GOING CRAZY! I am very well informed and very convinced that all that is due to withdrawl and that my brain needs time to adjust but OH MY GOD how can one stand this horrible times?I feel so terribly weak! All the time I have to push myself really hard: To get out of bed, to talk to friends, to go outside, to go to work, ...everything is a huge struggle...it is sooooo exhausting. Luckily I do have all the support I could wish for from friends and family and boyfriend! I am very thankful for that! But still I feel alone with all this war inside of me because I feel like they don´t know what I am going through. If I feel really bad for two weeks and then have a window – okay, at least you get a break. But feeling that awful for over a month is draining all my energy. How do you cope? How do you get through this? What do you do when you sit alone at home, feel to weak and terrible to call someone..how do you drag yourself out of this? Ps.: Sorry if my English is not that good:)
  10. Hello Everyone, This is for Fresh, who has coerced me in to finally starting my own forum thread which I will add to over time. Please pull up a chair, sit down and may be get a hot drink and let me begin. History In a galaxy.. far far away.... oh no that's not it. Ah this is it....... I was holidaying in Italy and got a bit too much sun one day, which meant that I got a pretty servere case of heat / sun stroke. I was unable to sleep for days on end as the slightest noise would jar me awake. I was also unable to eat properly at this time and had a bad stomach, which I believe was all brought on by the sun episode. I remember having a feeling that there was a black cloud above my right eye all of the time. I started to get depressed and felt myself getting lower and lower. Until one morning a few days after the incident, I had an ice cold shower. This bought on my first ever panic attack. I first had a feeling of buzzing in my head and then my muscles in my legs and hands started to contract. I now know this is caused by hyperventilation. An ambulance was called and I was taken to the ER in an Italian hospital where I was given Valium to calm me down. When I came round the black cloud had disappeared. (never to return.... well at least thus far). I was sent home and told to take liquid Valium twice a day for 3 further days. My holiday was coming to an end and this would see me through until I was on the flight home. I slept like a baby and felt wonderful when awake. I thought the whole episode was over, but little did I know that the big change in my life was just starting. I came home and was fine for 24 hours. I went to the cinema to watch the movie "Twister" and it was whilst the film was at one of it's high tension moments that I experienced my second panic attack, it was nowhere near as bad as my first but it affected me for the next couple of days as once again I lost my appetite. I started a new job and this put me in to another tailspin, and it seemed as though panic and anxiety ruled my life for the next 8 months or so. I was put on a short course of betablockers, but they didn't do anything. I can't remember the name of that particular medicine. I finally saw a GP and was diagnosed with Anxiety and Depression, I can honestly say that other than the depressive episode whilst on holiday I have never felt depressed in my life. Yes I have had blue days but never what I now think as depression. I was prescribed Seroxat 10mg once a day. Which I started to take in the morning. Early issues involved initial panic attack when first staring the meds and then suicidal ideation which I had never experienced before. I was concerned and spoke to a GP who then prescribed Diazepan to help me "get on to the drug", a strange phrase and if I'd realised at that time what these things were doing then I would have stopped taking them. It took approximately 2 - 4 weeks for me to start to feel relief and during this time I felt the meds entering every organ in my body or at least that's what I swear I felt. I even got in to a stage where I felt myself rocking back and forth but this only lasted a day or so. Anyway after 4 weeks I was better and over the course of a few months I started to feel "normal" (whatever that may be). I stayed on the meds for a few years before attempting to wean / taper myself off, but this was very shortlived as the symptoms soon appeared. Of course the GP said.... "that the original condition was coming back" and "you need to go back on the meds". So like a good patient always does, they follow the doctors orders, because after all, they know what is right for you, right? So I think I was on Seroxat for approximately 4 years and then started to experience what I now know as "poop-out", where the meds stopped working. So my GP moved me over to Escitalopram as it was a "easier" medication to contend with and would stop me feeling the SI's. Yes this was one of the side effects once the Seroxat had stopped working. To be continued..... Namaste. DC.
  11. HI all, I am currently on day 11 of no zoloft. I was pretty much on zoloft since I turned 16 ( 20 years), I went on it for depression but I believe it created me to have anxiety. I have seen many psychiatrist and my GP and no one ever asked why I am on it still. It was not until I started doing some research of my own the last few weeks because I have been increasing tired and my memory is so bad. I found that the zoloft can cause memory loss and anxiety. Since being off zoloft I have noticed a huge increase in energy along with my anixety decreasing. Up until yesterday, I had little side effects. Starting yesterday (day 10 of no zoloft) I have the WORST headache that will not go away. I have tried ibuprofen, claritin, excedrin, magnesium fizz. Anyone else have a similar story? If so, when will these headaches stop??? OR can you suggest something that will help?
  12. I have spent the last week in bed reading this site over and over, combing through the words, looking for some sign of hope. In 1997 I was placed on Paxil 20mg after a traumatic event; I was 16 at the time. At the time my parents were told I could come off anytime, no risk of anything. As soon as I was put on, I started experiencing very intense side effects but I was also in the throws of severe PTSD with constant panic attacks, insomnia, terror... So it was hard to say which was which. I remained on the Paxil until 2009. In 2009, I decided I wanted to go off. I never thought to google or look online, I just asked my OBGYN. She said that it's best to go slow, and gave me liquid paxil. She said to go down 5mg a month. I wish I could recall the details of how I tapered down between 20 and 8 but I honestly cannot. All I know is that I never had any side effects at all. Sometimes I would have brain zaps, and weird dreams that started just as I dozed off, but for the most part I was A-OK. NO other side effects at all and the ones I did have only lasted a few days at most. Fast forward to this year. After being on 8mg for years, I decided I wanted to try coming off because I was feeling chubby (if I'm being honest). Let me also state that this last year has been, without a doubt the most stressful time of my entire life. We moved, started new jobs, I was sexually harassed at work, I ended up working 3 jobs, nonstop SNS in overdrive. I say this, because I'm honestly not sure if what I am experiencing is Paxil related so I want to give the full details and story here. On February 3rd 2018 I took my liquid Paxil dose from 8mg - 7.5mg. Again, I had never googled this, I just kind of made it up in my head. I didn't know there was anything to even google because other than my OBGYN saying briefly to go down slow, I didn't even know withdrawal was a thing. Everything was great. ZERO side effects. However, in my life, everything fell apart. My 8 year old daughter get very, very ill, I had to quit one of my jobs due to extreme stress and abuse from a man, and money troubles were up. I was truly in a state of full blown stress - even more hormones were a mess. But still, I was going going going because I just don't know when to quit I suppose. Then, on March 5th, I went to bed and couldn't sleep. Each time I would lay down, I'd get a HUGE surge of adrenaline through my entire body. I'd drift to sleep but be woken by these intense jolts that would leave me throwing up. The first night I was afraid, but I was OK. But then when this happened again the second night, and 3rd night, I began to develop second fears and began to become terrified that something was wrong with me. I went straight to the doctor and begged her to help me. She said my chronic stress had caused me SNS to go into extreme haywire and told me to take Xanax to sleep. That night I took the xanax (I think it was .5) and it didn't help me sleep. Instead I just laid there terrified that I wasn't sleeping. At this point, the ONLY thing I was experiencing was insomnia and anxiety related to the insomnia because I am terrified of not sleeping since I was a little girl. I went to my doctor again, and she said it was just the extreme stress from the year and asked me about my Paxil. I told her I was on 7.5 and she said to go to 14mg. I have since read the incredibly informative post about how this is a horrible idea, but again, I had no reason to even suspect anything at all is wrong with Paxil or with the doctor. None. I went home and took the 14mg liquid Paxil on March 28th. On April 2nd I felt great. April 3rd- 9th I was back to my old self 100%, sleeping nonstop, going about my life. I was still a bit worried by the lack of sleep that happened, but tried not to think about it. And then BOOM two days before my period on April 10th, (sorry if TMI) the insomnia came roaring back - same with the adrenaline surges. I have not been able to sleep more than 1 hour at a time since, and when I do sleep I'm not really sleeping. It's like a half awake thing with adrenaline flashes constantly going off in my body. I'm exhausted. Beyond. I thought it was just my hormones going bananas due to the stress. I called a hormone doctor and she said it sounded just like peri-menopause and to come right in. I went two days ago and she said my hormones were crazy and these symptoms sounded like they were hormonal. But something wasn't right. It wasn't just the insomnia anymore - although I'm wondering if the insomnia is what is causing all of my other symptoms. Possible severe Adrenal Fatigue? Nervous breakdown? PTSD with my SNS stuck on? When I read the list of symptoms of Paxil withdrawal every single one fits - but those same symptoms are in line with SNS response from PTSD as well. Sounds, smells, dizzy, insomnia, burning skin, numb hands and feet, severe depersonalization, OCD obsession with looking up symptoms and possible causes all day every single day... I'm coming to you with my heart broken. I miss my beautiful children. I miss my life. I miss my husband and our family. I wish I could go back in time and figure out where I went wrong. Do you think it is possible that going from 8-7.5 on February 3rd could suddenly cause insomnia on March 5th? Even though it was such a tiny decrease and I'd never had any symptoms of withdrawal before? Also, I *know* I made a HUGE mistake taking the Paxil 14mg on March 28th. I hadn't slept since March 4th and I promise I had no clue this could even be bad. I thought Paxil was like a vitamin that fixed a deficiency I had. (Which I've since read on here, is not the truth). Will I eventually stabilize at 14mg? And then go down again from there? How long until I stabilize? If I go down on the 14mg at this point I'll just freak out my body even more, right? If this is adrenal fatigue or PTSD my SNS won't stabilize on the Paxil until those things are remedied? But this whole thing is causing even more PTSD. The nightmares and visions at night are the most horrifying things I have ever experienced. Night after night. Ugh. What do I do now? I SO respect and appreciate the moderators who give such careful and direct advice on here, and I am wondering how they would approach my situation Thank you. I know this is long. I just want to get it all on here to get the best advice for me and my little family. Thank you so much.
  13. Hello there, I am a 30 year old female, 5'4", current weight 108lbs. After being diagnosed with depression at the age of 19, I was prescribed antidepressants. Paxil was the first drug I believe I was put on, with little success. Cipralex was the next drug that I was on for a few years until they didnt seem to be working anymore. I experienced severe trauma at age 24, and developed PTSD as well as severe anxiety/panic disorder. I was then prescribed effexor 300mg and lorazapam for sleep. There were a few other drugs for anxiety that I tried but none of them seemed to work. After the loss of my father February 13,2013, I again experienced trauma and was diagnosed with a second case of PTSD and rebounded into severe depression. My physical state has been declining since 2010, beginning with severe gastrointestinal problems. I constantly had heartburn and was vomiting acid on a daily basis. I was prescribed Tecta, which is used to treat patients with ulcers and acid problems. After over a year taking Tecta, my stomach problems continued to worsen. I had gastroscopys and colonoscopys, ultrasounds, xrays and nuclear dye testing. After several different doctors, I was diagnosed with a Mallory Weiss Tear (a tear in the esophagus which occurs from vomiting too much, acid erosion of the intestines and esophagus), but no other explanation for my stomach problems. Then after experiencing severe stress, i ended up in the emergency room with horrific pain in my abdomen, nausea, vomiting, high fever and severe irritation and irritability. I had a panic attack that lasted for almost 4 hours, until i was given a dose of Valium. The test results from that hospital visit revealed a Hemangioma (a benign tumor on my liver, which sent me into absolute panic). After a discussion with my family doctor it was decided it was time to try and come off my anti-depressants, to see if they were the cause of my problems. On November 14 2014 I took my last dose of effexor ( i was weaned off by reducing my prescription to 150mg, then 75mg. He then prescribed me Seroquel at 25 mg to help with some of the side effects I began experiencing. They only got worse. Brain zaps, night sweats soaking my sheets and clothes, fevers, chills, shaking, dizzyness, nausea, vomiting, you name it, I experienced it in the first 3 months of withdrawl. Since taking my last effexor dose, I have lost over 40lbs (which I had gained mostly during my use of Effexor), currently weighing 108lbs as of this morning. My anxiety is horrific at times, inabling me to do simple tasks such as going to the grocery store, especially alone. I immediately start feeling anxious, sweaty and sometimes light-headed. My stomach problems have amplified, I am unable to eat a lot of foods I used to, and have a hard time absorbing nutrients and digesting food. Sometimes I feel nautious the entire day, others in periods of hours. I have a b12 deficiency which makes me tired all the time, and feeling gassed after going for short walks or doing household chores. The physical pain and problems I am experiencing are surely influencing and adding to my anxiety and relapsing depression, especially since I have been an active person my whole life. I have not been able to work for the past 6 years because of all of the issues I faced while on antidepressants, and now continuing into withdrawal. I feel as though I am lost in my own horrible nightmare that I cannot awake from. Feeling sick everyday has made me very isolated, I am not as social as i used to be, nor am I able to do a lot of things as I'm either in pain in my stomach, or am experiencing severe nausea and anxiety. I dont know what to do anymore. I dont have much of a support system as after my fathers passing, my mother moved in with my half sister, and now refuses to speak to me. My entire life as I knew it has been changed. I have been seeing a new dr for my stomach problems after recently having to move citys, and am awaiting test results. Though I am very pessimistic that he will be able to solve my issues as my suffering has gotten the best of me. I know this post is just a mess of information about my current and past history, but it is a reflection of who I am now, a mess. I tried asking for a referral to a psychiatrist or psychologist in my area and was told there is a 2 year waiting list. I dont know where else to try to find help and resources to attempt to pull myself out of this horrible nightmare. I have read many articles and posts on websites, so I finally decided to join here and throw my story up to see if anyone else has exeperienced any of the things I have. As well as any help, advice, or even just someone to talk to about what Ive been feeling. The few people I have left in my life are seemingly "overwhelmed" with all the things ive been going through, and although they try to be there, their inability to understand whats happened to me and relate to the things ive gone though and am going through makes it very hard. It has strained my few remaining relationships and im afraid if one more person gives up on me as everyone else has, then I will too. I barely have any fight left, but what I do have I am using to write this post today. I hope that someone reading this might be able to help or relate. I will gladly answer any questions that i may not have covered in my ramblings. thanks for taking the time to read this -freya13
  14. Hello everyone, I feel so lost right now. I was very stressed out August 2015 and was put on 10 mg of Lexapro for anxiety. About a month on the pills I met an amazing guy. Oh my goodness I was so crazy about him and I loved him so so much. About 9 months later I decided to get off the pills cause I didn't think I needed them anymore and I stopped cold turkey. About a month later I woke up one morning and all my feelings I had for him were gone. It was out of nowhere, no warning, nothing. The man I couldn't wait to marry and start a life with was like a stranger to me. I feel sick, I can't eat, all I wanna do is sleep. This has been going on for 4 months now. I really want reassurance that this will get better but it's so hard. How can you have the love of your life right in front of you and then during withdraw feel nothing? I just don't understand. Thank you in advance!
  15. Hi all, I've been on and off Citalapram for the last 9 years. Its a 10mg dose and I am desperate to be rid of them. I am worried about how long this is going to take me due to how long I have been on them. Also? The sode effects and how long they will take to go. What to expect etc
  16. Hello Everyone, I am very glad to have found this forum. As you will see in my signature, I am a 28 year old female with a long history for Sertraline use. I began taking Sertraline at age 15 for severe OCD/anxiety and have been on it ever since then. At one point, probably around 18 or so, I maxed out at 200 mg/day of Sertraline and stayed on that does to about age 25. Around age 25 I was able to taper from 200 mg to 100 mg successfully without really any symptoms of withdrawl that I can recall. I have worked extremely hard to overcome my illness, and am finally at a point in life where I feel I have amassed enough tools through therapy and support to try to come off of Sertraline completely, especially because we would like to have children within the next 5 years. With the support of my doctor, I am tapering down to 75 mg from 100 mg. It has been about a week and a half since I began the reduced dose and the past few days I have experienced very serious dizziness, headaches, nausea, and fatigue. I have joined this forum with hopes that someone may be able to provide me with tips for dealing with these uncomfortable symptoms. It is so bad that I really should not be driving and had to stay home from work today. My understanding is that pain relievers such as advil and aleve can make SSRIs less effective, so I don't want to take any pain relievers for the headache if it will make the situation worse. I am determined to get off of this medication though it seems it will be a difficult journey. *I would just like to mention that perhaps there is one confounding factor in my situation - I began Gabapentin about 3 weeks ago to help with numbness/tingling in my forearm from cubital tunnel neuropathies. I know this is also a neuro drug, so I figured I would mention it as well. Any tips, support, or encouragement that you can provide would be a huge help! Thank you in advanced! Mademoiselle
  17. Hi there! I'm rather new to the community and have not posted yet since starting my withdrawal from Effexor. It's been a little over a month from when I went from 75mg down to 9.375mg a day (one quarter of 37.5mg pill). The initial decrease was not too bad with the occasional lightheaded-ness and night sweats. At this point, my symptoms are gone and I intend to decrease again very shortly once I figure out how that can be done smoothly. The only symptom that still seems to be prevalent is my intolerance to exercise. I'm used to exercising regularly (3-4x/week, an hour at a time) and now can barely stand 15 minutes of normal exercise. I'll get very dizzy, cold sweats, and have vomited on occasion. I assume this is due to the withdrawal as nothing else has changed. There's a lot of info out there and I know many people have found supplements that help in certain situations and was wondering if anyone has had similar symptoms and found relief in some way. I've gained about 10 lbs since starting Effexor in January, 2017 and want to get this unneeded weight off as soon as I can as it impedes my ability to continue practicing aerial silks. Any help would be much appreciated! Thank you, Brenna
  18. Hi everyone -- I am currently on week 7 of being off of 20 mg of Escitalopram. The issue is, I'm not getting better as far as my mood. I'm extremely weepy, have lost a desire to cook (I barely eat or feel hungry), have lost a drive for basically anything except exercise and work (because I need it to survive of course). Further, this summer (right before I quit the drugs) my boyfriend broke up with me (due to his own depression/issues), I moved into a new apartment in a new city on my own (with not many friends in said city besides my ex-boyfriends family), and my job title changed/wasn't what I expected/lacks a routine every day (which I need to feel stable.) Because of this, I am uncertain as to whether my sadness is truly depression/anxiety or if it's just a withdraw symptom that will go away. I hopped on the medicine about a year ago (September 2016) because of PMDD -- I found that i was extremely down right before my periods. I got on birth control as well to control my hormones, but I stopped that this past month as well. I got off the medicine this past July -- cutting down to 10 mg for two weeks then off. (My doctor said one week of 10 mg and then off but that scared me...) Anyway I had weird reactions as far as feeling extremely dizzy, not feeling like i was in my body, and having a hard time talking to people/interacting. (Those have since gone away) I'm needing advice on whether I should reinstate or just wait it out. I'm beginning to feel helpless because everyone says "just give it time" but when I don't feel better over time -- I begin to feel like a failure and feel worse. I now feel super hopeless and begin getting anxious about situations that may or may not be real (mostly relating back to my previous relationship.) I have friends and family who support me being off of it -- I am taking calcium, magnesium, b12 and vitamin c supplements daily. I also have friends who tell me I got off at the wrong time and think I need to be on it. Quite frankly, I feel worse now on a daily basis than I did before I even got on the medicine and I'm just regretting ever starting to be honest. Any advice from people who actually have experience on this would be so helpful. Thank you!
  19. OK so I need some input on tapering off from 20mgs of Lexapro. I asked my doctor for the liquid version so it would be easier to measure the mg's but she told me there is not a liquid. There is though! So that made me mad. So I decided I'm going to have to break each tablet and weigh it to be accurate. Then my doctor told me to reduce the mgs by quarters. I feel like that is too big of a taper so instead I'm going to do it by mg every week or 2 weeks. I am on ~18mg now. Has anyone tapered off Lexapro before? How did you do it? Did you have awful withdrawl symptoms? I want this process to be as painless as possible. I feel like I can deal with the mental symptoms better than the physical (nausea, vomiting, etc.) Also, my last q-- is one is more likely to experience the worst withdrawl symptoms during a certain mg decrease? Please help I can't take this anxiety and fear of getting ill any more. I'm going to turn into a hermit if things don't get better.
  20. I don't know if this is the right place to post this but I'm curious to know why does SSRI withdrawal last longer than that from heroine or cocaine? Heroine or cocaine withdrawal can last a few months where as SSRI withdrawal can take years. This just doesn't seem right to me.
  21. Hello, I am new here, I came across your forum as I was searching for people who have had the same effects as I have had from prolonged use of citalopram. I have never used a forum before so please forgive me if I am not doing this right? The breaking point really is that my relationship (a very loving supportive one at that) is on the rocks due to how the drug has affected me over the years, my partner has had enough and so have I. I was put on Citalopram 8.5 years ago, started at 40mg, went down to 10mg at one point, back to 40mg and now of rthe past 5 years stable at 20mg. Have tried to come off them with only negative effects, docs no use in advice. Essentially I feel this: Bored, blank, terrible libido, no motivation, unable to complete tasks, disinterested, bad sleep, very sweaty, short tempered, no enthusiasm. It's ruining my life and I need help - after reading posts from other members I certainly feel like I am not alone, that I am not crazy and that I can get off these drugs before it's too late.
  22. Hi everyone! Well, here is my story ... I am a 21 year old female, and I have been on Paxil since I was 6 years old, and have maintained on about 40-60mg ever since. I was put on Paxil due to my anxiety disorder and OCD, as I refused to eat in a school cafeteria and would be in a sheer panic everyday about going to school. Apparently they tried to put me on Zoloft at some point early on, but it gave me headaches and nausea, so that is why Paxil was chosen. The Paxil worked wonders for me, and I was able to go to school and live a very normal and happy childhood. In 2010, I was diagnosed with Chronic Lyme disease that was making me feel pretty ill. I saw a Lyme specialist in 2011, and he suggested that I stop taking Paxil. It was attempted to switch my medication to another SSRI (I do not remember what it was), and I ended up with Serotonin Syndrome and had to go to the hospital. While following one Lyme doctor's protocol, I was taking over 25 pills and supplements a day, and I accidentally forgot to take my Paxil for a few days in a row. As you all probably know, I began experiencing severe withdrawl from stopping my medication cold-turkey. I could barely stand up unsupported, I had severe dizziness and nausea, I was light-headed and weepy, and I didn't eat for about three days, I just layed in my bed in the dark and slept and cried. My mom thought that I may have been experiencing what is called a "Herxheimer Reaction," which is a periodic exacerbation of symptoms in response to treatment. We later realized that I had been off of my medication for about 3-5 days, and I immediately started taking my Paxil again and was feeling back to my old self within a day. I experienced some depression and anxiety when my Lyme was diagnosed, and my Paxil dosage was raised to about 80mg for a time. I also experienced some patterns of disordered eating while on some strict diets to help my Lyme's, but for the past 3 or 4 years, I have basically been anxiety and depression free. Anyways! I was talking to my Psychiatrist this week, and I mentioned how I have been trying to lose some weight, as I have become quite unhappy with my body. She mentioned that Paxil may very well be causing my metabolism to be slow, and suggested I switch to Lexapro. Thinking ahead about 6-8 years, I asked her if Lexapro would be something I would be able to take during pregnancy one day, as I already knew Paxil would not be safe for having children one day. She said that when I want to have children, I would probably be switched to Zoloft, so I suggested that we just start there, instead of making me change medication again, to which she agreed. I am a bit scared of switching from Paxil to Zoloft, due to the bad experience I had when forgetting to take my medication before, as well as the experience with Serotonin Syndrome. I am afraid of experiencing withdrawl, and all of the horror stories I have heard about. I am also scared that if the Zoloft doesn't work from me or I am having a hard time, that I will try to go back on Paxil and it will not work anymore. So I joined this site to hopfully learn about anyone else's experience with changing from Paxil to another medication, specifically Zoloft. So far, here is the plan.... Week 1: Drop 10mg of Paxil (watch for withdrawl) 30mg Paxil morning, 10mg Paxil night Week 2: Add Zoloft (watch for reaction to Zoloft) 30mg Paxil morning, 10mg Paxil and 25mg Zoloft night Week 3: 20mg Paxil morning, 10mg Paxil and 50mg Zoloft night Week 4: 20mg Paxil morning, 75mg Paxil night Week 5: 10mg Paxil and 50mg Zoloft morning, 50mg Zoloft night
  23. I am currently withdrawing from Paxil. Did a too fast taper, crashed bad, and have reinstated. I seem to be somewhat (compared to being out of my mind) stabilized after 3 months of reinstatement. However, my daily routine aside from poor sleep quality, is that I feel very anxious with panic barely under control from about 5:00 AM until noon'ish. The rest of the day I am functional and actually have periods where I feel almost normal. Does anybody experiencing Paxil (or any SSRI) withdrawal have this symptom pattern? Before using Paxil I never had any of these symptoms. I took it for mild seasonal depression annually for 4 months. Each year it was harder and harder to get off. I should have paid closer attention.
  24. So, after about 7 years on varying dosages of Zoloft (varied during pregnancy), I've spent the last 9 months stepping down from 100mg to 75mg (no withdrawl symptoms then) to 50 (insomnia, irritability, visual twitches). My provider helped ease those symptoms with supplements: Thorne's cortisol manager and 5HTP --these made a HUGE difference for me. Simultaneously started a very low dosage of plant based progesterone (am in early perimenopause). I inadvertantly missed three doses of the Zoloft at the beginning of the week (I sometimes fall asleep putting my little one to bed and feel too sleepy if I take the sertraline in the morning). Since, I have been feeling pretty dizzy and irritable and somewhat weepy. I am trying to decide whether to just forge ahead with added Pharma Gabba and extra 5 htp supplements suggested by my provider or to reactivate the Zoloft at 25 mg. My provider has indicated she supports either decision as long as i "feel safe." I started on Zoloft in the first place because of post-partum depression and anxiety. I now have two young children, a middle school-aged boy and a rocky marriage resulting from poor choices I've made, I think, because I was seeking stimulation -- to feel something again. That's why I decided to get off the ZOloft. I am hoping that feeling some hghs and lows instead of stable -- but flat and dulled, will help me be more present in my life. While I trust and like my main health care provider and am in marriage counseling with my husband, I do not have an individual counselor or psychaitrist. Am I taking too big of a risk by not continuing to taper? I have a refill waiting for me of the 50 mg pills to break inhalf ...
  25. Hello. I am Bipolar, With situational Anxiety and PMDD and (they implied that i have "mild PTSD" if thats even a thing). I have been receiving treatment for 3 years now. So, due to losing my insurance and working through a clinic who made me wait months at a time for doctor appointments I couldn't get my medication refilled early January. (The clinic often had issues getting me my meds. During these times and would often make me taper down till they came in.) as a result I would be sick for weeks at a time each switch. Then I couldn't get help at all. i tapered off as best i could over a 3 week period (its all i had left) I finally secured new insurance, found a new doctor, I see them in a week. But i have had 2 months now without meds and I am falling apart. The first month was OK, nothing too extreme, i actually felt better than ever (ie i suddenly went manic) then suddenly after that it was all Death thoughts, depression, hours of crying, nausea/dryheaving, tension, headaches, appetite loss, excessive sleeping, tremors, disorientation, rage, etc. I even gritted my teeth so hard freaking out one day i broke a tooth! everything has the volume cranked up in my head. It's scaring me from even leaving the house. It's too much like before i had treatment at my lowest points and it scares me. I understand some is the perspective of suddenly having to deal with this mental space again suddenly. But This is clearly not normal for me. The fact I was being tossed from one med to another constantly can't help. I have been switched on and off between several over a 3 year span! I have been praised for my many healthy coping mechanisms, so I know I'm -usually- treating myself properly. i take walks, When i can think properly i make art, i try my best to eat well, take hot showers, talk to my husband, focus on caring for my pets, and move around and take my day only a few hours at a time. I even quit my job to focus on healing. But it's gotten pretty terrifying. No matter how much compassion I want for myself I can't stop being depressed for long, and it's getting worse. It comes in waves, lasting for hours at a time and then suddenly it is gone again. I feel so drained and uncertain how to treat myself anymore. My biggest challenge is just to be kind to myself while I ride it out. My self compassion goes right out the window the minute the "clouds" form in my mind. Nice to meet you all.
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