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Coopergirl1 off Lexapro, with emotional anesthesia


Coopergirl1

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Why am I having such a hard time today? Why is my brain convincing me to just run away so you don't get hurt..this guy would never hurt me. Please help

Started Prozac 20 MG March 2014-Sept 2014

New doctor switched me to Lexapro 10 MG and it helped from Sept 2014-Feb 2015 and then I felt the Lexapro wasn't helping as much so he changed the dose to 20 MG and I took that from Feb 2015-July 2015 when I decided to get off pills completely.I had to reinstate as I was feeling so bad and very pressured to go back on pills. My Dr put me on 50 MG zoloft and I took it for about a week..made me feel brain dead. Went down to 25 before I really learned the trouble of fast tapering..finally got a jewelry scale to properly weigh out my pills. Looking to just feel OK. Unsure where to go next.

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Why am I having such a hard time? I thought things would get better since being off Lexapro? Does anyone else feel like this? I am so impatient

Started Prozac 20 MG March 2014-Sept 2014

New doctor switched me to Lexapro 10 MG and it helped from Sept 2014-Feb 2015 and then I felt the Lexapro wasn't helping as much so he changed the dose to 20 MG and I took that from Feb 2015-July 2015 when I decided to get off pills completely.I had to reinstate as I was feeling so bad and very pressured to go back on pills. My Dr put me on 50 MG zoloft and I took it for about a week..made me feel brain dead. Went down to 25 before I really learned the trouble of fast tapering..finally got a jewelry scale to properly weigh out my pills. Looking to just feel OK. Unsure where to go next.

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  • Moderator

Hi Coopergirl--  "Why am I having such a hard time?"  Because you're fighting too hard. What you are experiencing is pretty standard Lexapro WD.  There is no quick fix for this, it's going to take a lot of time, but it will get better.  Patience is something you will have to develop, because if you don't, you'll make yourself craze and cause yourself an undue amount of pain. 

 

One very effective technique to use is referred to as AAF. Acknowledge, Accept, Float. 

 

First the situation/symptoms need to be Acknowledged.  Through no fault of your own you are now very sick and there are going to be a lot of very unpleasant symptoms to deal with, and like any major illness getting better will now be your primary focus.  Mentally explore the situation, feelings or lack there of, symptoms etc. and get to know them.

 

Secondly you have to truly accept that is happening.  The symptoms and feeling or lack there of are going to happen no matter what you say about it, there is nothing you can do about them or the situation.

 

Lastly, let the symptoms and unpleasantness float off as you go on about your life as best as you can, believing that it will get better in time.

 

Like every other skill  this will take practice, but it does work and once learned is a skill that will last a lifetime.

 

We're all pulling for you, but can only offer support and the advice we have see work many times, the true healing has to come from within you.

 

(((((((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))

20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013.

Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks.  The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better.

Final Dose 0.016mg.     Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017

 

"It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general."  Stephen Hawking

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Thank you so much Tom. I appreciate all of your help in this hard time. It is so crazy the medicine had done this to me and how badly I have to fight to get myself back. I feel like my brain is telling me no you're fine this is the way it's always going to be and the medicine didn't effect you but why am I invincible? I am not and I am sick now. I was never this way before.

Started Prozac 20 MG March 2014-Sept 2014

New doctor switched me to Lexapro 10 MG and it helped from Sept 2014-Feb 2015 and then I felt the Lexapro wasn't helping as much so he changed the dose to 20 MG and I took that from Feb 2015-July 2015 when I decided to get off pills completely.I had to reinstate as I was feeling so bad and very pressured to go back on pills. My Dr put me on 50 MG zoloft and I took it for about a week..made me feel brain dead. Went down to 25 before I really learned the trouble of fast tapering..finally got a jewelry scale to properly weigh out my pills. Looking to just feel OK. Unsure where to go next.

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I feel like I am just not meant to be happy. I feel like nothing in my life is right even though everything is. Lexapro made me lose feelings for the only person who mattered to me and I've been off 2 months and nothing is getting better. Does it ever end? I want to give up

Started Prozac 20 MG March 2014-Sept 2014

New doctor switched me to Lexapro 10 MG and it helped from Sept 2014-Feb 2015 and then I felt the Lexapro wasn't helping as much so he changed the dose to 20 MG and I took that from Feb 2015-July 2015 when I decided to get off pills completely.I had to reinstate as I was feeling so bad and very pressured to go back on pills. My Dr put me on 50 MG zoloft and I took it for about a week..made me feel brain dead. Went down to 25 before I really learned the trouble of fast tapering..finally got a jewelry scale to properly weigh out my pills. Looking to just feel OK. Unsure where to go next.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Coopergirl, I merged your other post into this one. It's one thread per person within the introductions forum. Keep coming back to here if you want to add to it

 

Dalsaan

Please note - I am not a medical practitioner and I do not give medical advice. I offer an opinion based on my own experiences, reading and discussion with others.On Effexor for 2 months at the start of 2005. Had extreme insomnia as an adverse reaction. Changed to mirtazapine. Have been trying to get off since mid 2008 with numerous failures including CTs and slow (but not slow enough tapers)Have slow tapered at 10 per cent or less for years. I have liquid mirtazapine made at a compounding chemist.

Was on 1.6 ml as at 19 March 2014.

Dropped to 1.5 ml 7 June 2014. Dropped to 1.4 in about September.

Dropped to 1.3 on 20 December 2014. Dropped to 1.2 in mid Jan 2015.

Dropped to 1 ml in late Feb 2015. I think my old medication had run out of puff so I tried 1ml when I got the new stuff and it seems to be going ok. Sleep has been good over the last week (as of 13/3/15).

Dropped to 1/2 ml 14/11/15 Fatigue still there as are memory and cognition problems. Sleep is patchy but liveable compared to what it has been in the past.

 

DRUG FREE - as at 1st May 2017

 

>My intro post is here - http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/2250-dalsaan

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  • Moderator Emeritus

It does end and you will get better. You are young and weren't on the drugs for that long compared to others. These two things are on your side. You have to be patient

 

Dalsaan

Please note - I am not a medical practitioner and I do not give medical advice. I offer an opinion based on my own experiences, reading and discussion with others.On Effexor for 2 months at the start of 2005. Had extreme insomnia as an adverse reaction. Changed to mirtazapine. Have been trying to get off since mid 2008 with numerous failures including CTs and slow (but not slow enough tapers)Have slow tapered at 10 per cent or less for years. I have liquid mirtazapine made at a compounding chemist.

Was on 1.6 ml as at 19 March 2014.

Dropped to 1.5 ml 7 June 2014. Dropped to 1.4 in about September.

Dropped to 1.3 on 20 December 2014. Dropped to 1.2 in mid Jan 2015.

Dropped to 1 ml in late Feb 2015. I think my old medication had run out of puff so I tried 1ml when I got the new stuff and it seems to be going ok. Sleep has been good over the last week (as of 13/3/15).

Dropped to 1/2 ml 14/11/15 Fatigue still there as are memory and cognition problems. Sleep is patchy but liveable compared to what it has been in the past.

 

DRUG FREE - as at 1st May 2017

 

>My intro post is here - http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/2250-dalsaan

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I'm sorry. I didn't know! I will keep things on this thread. I hope it all gets better in time and this is just a rough patch. The person I am with I was just happy with 6 months ago and nothing has changed accept my feelings but I feel like it was the med and will recover over time.

Started Prozac 20 MG March 2014-Sept 2014

New doctor switched me to Lexapro 10 MG and it helped from Sept 2014-Feb 2015 and then I felt the Lexapro wasn't helping as much so he changed the dose to 20 MG and I took that from Feb 2015-July 2015 when I decided to get off pills completely.I had to reinstate as I was feeling so bad and very pressured to go back on pills. My Dr put me on 50 MG zoloft and I took it for about a week..made me feel brain dead. Went down to 25 before I really learned the trouble of fast tapering..finally got a jewelry scale to properly weigh out my pills. Looking to just feel OK. Unsure where to go next.

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AnotherAnon- I am so sorry to hear that you went through that. Honestly no one deserves that. If I could give you any advice it would be to not stay on that long. I had the same thing happen to me and that's why I got on these. I wish I would've chose counseling instead of medication. All it did was cover up what I was really feeling inside.

Started Prozac 20 MG March 2014-Sept 2014

New doctor switched me to Lexapro 10 MG and it helped from Sept 2014-Feb 2015 and then I felt the Lexapro wasn't helping as much so he changed the dose to 20 MG and I took that from Feb 2015-July 2015 when I decided to get off pills completely.I had to reinstate as I was feeling so bad and very pressured to go back on pills. My Dr put me on 50 MG zoloft and I took it for about a week..made me feel brain dead. Went down to 25 before I really learned the trouble of fast tapering..finally got a jewelry scale to properly weigh out my pills. Looking to just feel OK. Unsure where to go next.

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Also, I weaned off only over a one month period. Could that also be effecting my healing time?

Started Prozac 20 MG March 2014-Sept 2014

New doctor switched me to Lexapro 10 MG and it helped from Sept 2014-Feb 2015 and then I felt the Lexapro wasn't helping as much so he changed the dose to 20 MG and I took that from Feb 2015-July 2015 when I decided to get off pills completely.I had to reinstate as I was feeling so bad and very pressured to go back on pills. My Dr put me on 50 MG zoloft and I took it for about a week..made me feel brain dead. Went down to 25 before I really learned the trouble of fast tapering..finally got a jewelry scale to properly weigh out my pills. Looking to just feel OK. Unsure where to go next.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

That's what caused your withdrawal but I still think a quick taper is better than cold turkey

Please note - I am not a medical practitioner and I do not give medical advice. I offer an opinion based on my own experiences, reading and discussion with others.On Effexor for 2 months at the start of 2005. Had extreme insomnia as an adverse reaction. Changed to mirtazapine. Have been trying to get off since mid 2008 with numerous failures including CTs and slow (but not slow enough tapers)Have slow tapered at 10 per cent or less for years. I have liquid mirtazapine made at a compounding chemist.

Was on 1.6 ml as at 19 March 2014.

Dropped to 1.5 ml 7 June 2014. Dropped to 1.4 in about September.

Dropped to 1.3 on 20 December 2014. Dropped to 1.2 in mid Jan 2015.

Dropped to 1 ml in late Feb 2015. I think my old medication had run out of puff so I tried 1ml when I got the new stuff and it seems to be going ok. Sleep has been good over the last week (as of 13/3/15).

Dropped to 1/2 ml 14/11/15 Fatigue still there as are memory and cognition problems. Sleep is patchy but liveable compared to what it has been in the past.

 

DRUG FREE - as at 1st May 2017

 

>My intro post is here - http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/2250-dalsaan

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2 months off and still feel like crap..no emotions back just very empty..my friends are saying get back on the pills. I do not want to. I want to fight through this. I want my life back.

Started Prozac 20 MG March 2014-Sept 2014

New doctor switched me to Lexapro 10 MG and it helped from Sept 2014-Feb 2015 and then I felt the Lexapro wasn't helping as much so he changed the dose to 20 MG and I took that from Feb 2015-July 2015 when I decided to get off pills completely.I had to reinstate as I was feeling so bad and very pressured to go back on pills. My Dr put me on 50 MG zoloft and I took it for about a week..made me feel brain dead. Went down to 25 before I really learned the trouble of fast tapering..finally got a jewelry scale to properly weigh out my pills. Looking to just feel OK. Unsure where to go next.

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  • Administrator

Coopergirl, obsessing over your lack of feeling may be making you a person who's difficult to be with. Please try to stop worrying about this. It will slowly fade.

 

The more you exercise your "enjoy" capacity, the faster your feelings will come back. Do what you can to enjoy small pleasures from day to day, including your kind boyfriend.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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Coopergirl, obsessing over your lack of feeling may be making you a person who's difficult to be with. Please try to stop worrying about this. It will slowly fade.

 

The more you exercise your "enjoy" capacity, the faster your feelings will come back. Do what you can to enjoy small pleasures from day to day, including your kind boyfriend.

I agree. This is like how I sometimes obsess over getting enough sleep. You can't get more sleep by directly obsessing over it. You also can't persuade yourself into having stronger feelings for your partner. It can only happen indirectly (not to imply that I've mastered this!). If you learn to relax and enjoy life, it will happen. I happened a few days ago to come upon Dr. Stuart Brown's quote as follows: "The opposite of play is not work. It's depression." It's such a profound statement. I realized I haven't played in a long time. Cooper, how often do you just relax and play? If you focus on developing the rest of your life, your romantic life will be improved indirectly in my opinion. I know you want to just directly fix this right away but I think that's like an insomniac staring at the clock and trying to persuade himself to fall asleep.

-I was on an SSRI (most recently Celexa at 40mg/day) for about 15 years for anxiety. I tapered off over about 8 months and in 2015 and had worsened anxiety and well-being once off it. In the fall of 2015 (I believe) I did a low dose reinstatement and was doing better. I stayed on roughly 1 ml (2 mg) for a while but eventually lowered it to .5 ml and was on this for a long time.

-Around late mid May (2017) my anxiety was worse and I increased the Celexa to 1.5 ml. At first, I felt significantly better but I developed a hand tremor. I also was having some attention and concentration difficulties. In mid July (over about 2 weeks) I tapered off of the Celexa and was off it for about 2 1/2 weeks before I started to feel an intense increase in anxiety and my hand tremor returned.

-Aug 13, 2017 I did a low dose reinstatement of 0.5 ml a day and am currently still taking that. Initial response is good.

-Early September 2017 to present - hand tremor returns and attention and concentration are impaired. Feeling of unbalance/unsteadiness from using treadmill. Mild changes to sexual performance too.

-Sept 18, 2017: 0.4 ml Celexa. Everything is generally improving although hand tremor is worse. Attention, concentration, and anxiety are good.

-I am also on Wellbutrin (200 mg/day) for anxiety and take a Benadryl at night for sleep and allergies. Eventually I'd like to be off everything.

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9730-chancelucky-antidepressant-withdrawal-social-anxiety-pessimism/

 

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ChanceLucky-you are right. I honestly just can't control the crying, emotions and confusion. I have always thought I was untouchable like no way these drugs didn't and can't effect me. It's such a hard concept to wrap my head again but I have read my same story over and over again and it is not uncommon. I'm sorry for pestering anyone ever I just feel so down I look for light anyway I can.

Started Prozac 20 MG March 2014-Sept 2014

New doctor switched me to Lexapro 10 MG and it helped from Sept 2014-Feb 2015 and then I felt the Lexapro wasn't helping as much so he changed the dose to 20 MG and I took that from Feb 2015-July 2015 when I decided to get off pills completely.I had to reinstate as I was feeling so bad and very pressured to go back on pills. My Dr put me on 50 MG zoloft and I took it for about a week..made me feel brain dead. Went down to 25 before I really learned the trouble of fast tapering..finally got a jewelry scale to properly weigh out my pills. Looking to just feel OK. Unsure where to go next.

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ChanceLucky-you are right. I honestly just can't control the crying, emotions and confusion. I have always thought I was untouchable like no way these drugs didn't and can't effect me. It's such a hard concept to wrap my head again but I have read my same story over and over again and it is not uncommon. I'm sorry for pestering anyone ever I just feel so down I look for light anyway I can.

I understand things are really hard. Have you read about neuroplasticity and neurogenesis? That's a fancy way of saying your life experiences and behaviors change your brain. If you want a happier life, you have to do things like exercise, meditate, and play. Regardless of the antidepressant, you can develop a healthy brain. It's just harder now.

-I was on an SSRI (most recently Celexa at 40mg/day) for about 15 years for anxiety. I tapered off over about 8 months and in 2015 and had worsened anxiety and well-being once off it. In the fall of 2015 (I believe) I did a low dose reinstatement and was doing better. I stayed on roughly 1 ml (2 mg) for a while but eventually lowered it to .5 ml and was on this for a long time.

-Around late mid May (2017) my anxiety was worse and I increased the Celexa to 1.5 ml. At first, I felt significantly better but I developed a hand tremor. I also was having some attention and concentration difficulties. In mid July (over about 2 weeks) I tapered off of the Celexa and was off it for about 2 1/2 weeks before I started to feel an intense increase in anxiety and my hand tremor returned.

-Aug 13, 2017 I did a low dose reinstatement of 0.5 ml a day and am currently still taking that. Initial response is good.

-Early September 2017 to present - hand tremor returns and attention and concentration are impaired. Feeling of unbalance/unsteadiness from using treadmill. Mild changes to sexual performance too.

-Sept 18, 2017: 0.4 ml Celexa. Everything is generally improving although hand tremor is worse. Attention, concentration, and anxiety are good.

-I am also on Wellbutrin (200 mg/day) for anxiety and take a Benadryl at night for sleep and allergies. Eventually I'd like to be off everything.

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9730-chancelucky-antidepressant-withdrawal-social-anxiety-pessimism/

 

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My boyfriend came home last night with a kitten and honestly we played the whole night and I didn't think once about anything terrible. I feel you are right I just need to keep active and not dwell so much. I know this HAS to pass in time. I was lucky to only have been on the drugs 1

.5 years. It has to get better.

Started Prozac 20 MG March 2014-Sept 2014

New doctor switched me to Lexapro 10 MG and it helped from Sept 2014-Feb 2015 and then I felt the Lexapro wasn't helping as much so he changed the dose to 20 MG and I took that from Feb 2015-July 2015 when I decided to get off pills completely.I had to reinstate as I was feeling so bad and very pressured to go back on pills. My Dr put me on 50 MG zoloft and I took it for about a week..made me feel brain dead. Went down to 25 before I really learned the trouble of fast tapering..finally got a jewelry scale to properly weigh out my pills. Looking to just feel OK. Unsure where to go next.

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Thinking about the reasons you're lucky is a great idea!

-I was on an SSRI (most recently Celexa at 40mg/day) for about 15 years for anxiety. I tapered off over about 8 months and in 2015 and had worsened anxiety and well-being once off it. In the fall of 2015 (I believe) I did a low dose reinstatement and was doing better. I stayed on roughly 1 ml (2 mg) for a while but eventually lowered it to .5 ml and was on this for a long time.

-Around late mid May (2017) my anxiety was worse and I increased the Celexa to 1.5 ml. At first, I felt significantly better but I developed a hand tremor. I also was having some attention and concentration difficulties. In mid July (over about 2 weeks) I tapered off of the Celexa and was off it for about 2 1/2 weeks before I started to feel an intense increase in anxiety and my hand tremor returned.

-Aug 13, 2017 I did a low dose reinstatement of 0.5 ml a day and am currently still taking that. Initial response is good.

-Early September 2017 to present - hand tremor returns and attention and concentration are impaired. Feeling of unbalance/unsteadiness from using treadmill. Mild changes to sexual performance too.

-Sept 18, 2017: 0.4 ml Celexa. Everything is generally improving although hand tremor is worse. Attention, concentration, and anxiety are good.

-I am also on Wellbutrin (200 mg/day) for anxiety and take a Benadryl at night for sleep and allergies. Eventually I'd like to be off everything.

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9730-chancelucky-antidepressant-withdrawal-social-anxiety-pessimism/

 

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My friend is telling me " you don't look happy " ..even in withdrawal you should be somewhat happy..how the hell.....would I be happy in withdrawal??

Started Prozac 20 MG March 2014-Sept 2014

New doctor switched me to Lexapro 10 MG and it helped from Sept 2014-Feb 2015 and then I felt the Lexapro wasn't helping as much so he changed the dose to 20 MG and I took that from Feb 2015-July 2015 when I decided to get off pills completely.I had to reinstate as I was feeling so bad and very pressured to go back on pills. My Dr put me on 50 MG zoloft and I took it for about a week..made me feel brain dead. Went down to 25 before I really learned the trouble of fast tapering..finally got a jewelry scale to properly weigh out my pills. Looking to just feel OK. Unsure where to go next.

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  • Moderator

"how the hell.....would I be happy in withdrawal??"  You were last night with the kitten.

20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013.

Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks.  The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better.

Final Dose 0.016mg.     Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017

 

"It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general."  Stephen Hawking

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  • Administrator

Stop listening to your friends' dumb comments.

 

Take care of yourself, enjoy the little moments, accept it that it will take a while for you to feel like your old self.

 

As ChanceLucky pointed out, dwelling on how bad you feel is no way to make yourself feel better.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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I just wanted to thank everyone on this thread for all of your help and I truly believe I would've been fooled into going back onto medication if not for all of you. I pray for recovery, and for happiness in my relationship again. I know there is a plan for me and you have helped me keep waking up every morning and trying again.

 

- On another note I'm wondering is a voice in my head telling me bad thoughts normal during 2 months of withdrawal? I feel as if I ignore it everyday gets better. I know this can't be me. I know it is neuro emotion I just feel so silly for thinking 1.5 years on Lexapro could do this to me. But it can and is..I believe.

Started Prozac 20 MG March 2014-Sept 2014

New doctor switched me to Lexapro 10 MG and it helped from Sept 2014-Feb 2015 and then I felt the Lexapro wasn't helping as much so he changed the dose to 20 MG and I took that from Feb 2015-July 2015 when I decided to get off pills completely.I had to reinstate as I was feeling so bad and very pressured to go back on pills. My Dr put me on 50 MG zoloft and I took it for about a week..made me feel brain dead. Went down to 25 before I really learned the trouble of fast tapering..finally got a jewelry scale to properly weigh out my pills. Looking to just feel OK. Unsure where to go next.

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  • Administrator

The reason this site is here is because people often suffer strange symptoms going off drugs and after they go off.

 

Why has your relationship become unhappy?

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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I've just been reading your thread, Coopergirl1--. Yes, absolutely, 1.5 years on any antidepressant can do this. It takes time for your brain to return to the way it was before you were on the Lexapro. All of this can be a part of the withdrawal process. I know it seems that 2 months like this is forever, but it is really not such a long time, where withdrawal is concerned.

 

XOXO

Zoloft 100 mg. daily for Chronic Fatigue Syndrome since Oct. 1994 / Synthroid 88 mcg. daily / Supplements: Neptune Krill Oil-1,000 mg. twice daily/Astaxanthin 10 mg. twice daily/Ubiquinol 100 mg. twice daily (These 3 have allowed me to discontinue (approved by doctor) bp meds I was on. Calcium Citrate 500 mg. daily/Vitamin D3 2,400 iu daily/K2 (MK7) 100 mcg daily (osteopenia and fam. hist. of severe osteoporosis). Stress B Complex (1/2 dose)/Quercetin (for allergies/asthma)/Magnesium (400 mg. oral glycinate and about 50 mg. magnesium chloride spray oil a day, divided throughout day).

Tapered Zoloft about 6 wks. Totally off since the end of July (25-29, 2014). 3 wks. vertigo at end of taper, then 3-4 wks. OK, followed by withdrawal symptoms increasing in severity (nausea, gastric disturbances, loss of appetite, insomnia, restlessness, jitters, anxiety, agitation--jumping out of my skin--possible akathisia?) Seem to have paradoxical reactions to everything new, even Vitamin C. Severity of akathisia comes and goes, but is constant to some degree. Hard to leave house, and cannot be home alone. (Retired)

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To be honest I feel the reason I am unhappy is because I am unable to feel right now. My boyfriend has been nothing but supportive. And thanks Luv2knit♡♡ I appreciate your feedback so much

Started Prozac 20 MG March 2014-Sept 2014

New doctor switched me to Lexapro 10 MG and it helped from Sept 2014-Feb 2015 and then I felt the Lexapro wasn't helping as much so he changed the dose to 20 MG and I took that from Feb 2015-July 2015 when I decided to get off pills completely.I had to reinstate as I was feeling so bad and very pressured to go back on pills. My Dr put me on 50 MG zoloft and I took it for about a week..made me feel brain dead. Went down to 25 before I really learned the trouble of fast tapering..finally got a jewelry scale to properly weigh out my pills. Looking to just feel OK. Unsure where to go next.

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  • Administrator

Coopergirl, please try to appreciate your boyfriend for what he's giving you right now -- supportiveness during a rough patch -- and stop focusing on your inner life. You being absorbed in yourself may eventually discourage him.

 

If you tell your boyfriend over and over you are unhappy despite his love and efforts, what do you think will happen?

 

And that's not even true!!! Did you take photos of the two of you playing with your kitten? Look at these photos whenever you feel down and "change the channel" from feeling down to "I have good spells, I can do this, I can be patient."

 

You don't have to deny you're feeling odd, but being balanced about your symptoms -- don't make them into a catastrophe -- will strengthen your relationship. Letting your symptoms overcome your thinking and behavior will undermine your relationship.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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I know you're right. I can be patient I will get through this. It is so hard to tell myself the meds changed me but they did. I would've never second guessed my relationship before. I will heal.

Started Prozac 20 MG March 2014-Sept 2014

New doctor switched me to Lexapro 10 MG and it helped from Sept 2014-Feb 2015 and then I felt the Lexapro wasn't helping as much so he changed the dose to 20 MG and I took that from Feb 2015-July 2015 when I decided to get off pills completely.I had to reinstate as I was feeling so bad and very pressured to go back on pills. My Dr put me on 50 MG zoloft and I took it for about a week..made me feel brain dead. Went down to 25 before I really learned the trouble of fast tapering..finally got a jewelry scale to properly weigh out my pills. Looking to just feel OK. Unsure where to go next.

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Exactly!

 

You're very young, it's too bad you have to learn this lesson so soon, but you need to be brave and patient, you will get through this.

 

People can be in a happy relationship yet individually have bad things happen that make them feel down for a time.

 

A sick relationship is another thing entirely....

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

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I know you are right. It is terrible to think I was so happy 6 months ago, and take my daily pill as directed by a doctor and one day a switch went off it seems. I feel lucky to have recognized it is the pills and happy I decided to get off them. Neuro emotions are so real feeling but with all the help I have received here I know it is false emotion associated with the Lexapro. I have never had such a trusting, loyal and caring person like my boyfriend. Neuro emotions are saying "leave" but I am never going to listen to it and one day once I'm healed I will be able to look back on this and be thankful I didn't make any decisions that I'd regret.

Started Prozac 20 MG March 2014-Sept 2014

New doctor switched me to Lexapro 10 MG and it helped from Sept 2014-Feb 2015 and then I felt the Lexapro wasn't helping as much so he changed the dose to 20 MG and I took that from Feb 2015-July 2015 when I decided to get off pills completely.I had to reinstate as I was feeling so bad and very pressured to go back on pills. My Dr put me on 50 MG zoloft and I took it for about a week..made me feel brain dead. Went down to 25 before I really learned the trouble of fast tapering..finally got a jewelry scale to properly weigh out my pills. Looking to just feel OK. Unsure where to go next.

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When you feel that way, you might post in Lost my feelings for my boyfriend and want them back

Edited by Altostrata
updated link

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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  • Moderator Emeritus

Hi Coopergirl, I am going to answer your message here in your thread if that's ok?  It is a common thing to happen with drugs. Guilt and shame are part of depression that the drugs are given for, they change the way the brain works so those feelings are lessened or go away completely. But it doesn't end there, love is also eradicated, along with most emotions.  Those emotions do return and you will get feelings back again. There have been people who no longer felt love for their children but it has resolved. It is hard to believe that maternal love can be quashed but it often is, along with romantic love. 

 

Your boyfriend sounds very supportive and is helping you through this, don't throw that away because feelings will come back.

I was devoid of feelings for a long time and thought I no longer loved my husband. Sadly he died before the feelings returned and that upsets me because now those feelings have returned and he isn't here. I can remember him now with fondness and look forward to the time when I will be able to see him again. Not in the sense of waiting to die, but just looking forward to the time when I will see him and my parents again, but for a long time I felt nothing.

 

Don't be tempted to find someone else and look for excitement in an affair, which is also quite common, just to feel SOMETHING. You would regret it later and have more heartache when you have stabilised. Try not to force the feelings, and try not to keep looking for them because it will be frustrating. Keep going, live your life as well as you can and do things together that you enjoy. You will get better, I wish I could say when that is likely but everyone is different and healing happens at it's own pace, it can't be rushed but it is happening right now, your brain and nervous system are trying to get back to normality and will keep trying until it makes it! 

**I am not a medical professional, if in doubt please consult a doctor with withdrawal knowledge.

 

 

Different drugs occasionally (mostly benzos) 1976 - 1981 (no problem)

1993 - 2002 in and out of hospital. every type of drug + ECT. Staring with seroxat

2002  effexor. 

Tapered  March 2012 to March 2013, ending with 5 beads.

Withdrawal April 2013 . Reinstated 5 beads reduced to 4 beads May 2013

Restarted taper  Nov 2013  

OFF EFFEXOR Feb 2015    :D 

Tapered atenolol and omeprazole Dec 2013 - May 2014

 

Tapering tramadol, Feb 2015 100mg , March 2015 50mg  

 July 2017 30mg.  May 15 2018 25mg

Taking fish oil, magnesium, B12, folic acid, bilberry eyebright for eye pressure. 

 

My story http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/4199-hello-mammap-checking-in/page-33

 

Lesson learned, slow down taper at lower doses. Taper no more than 10% of CURRENT dose if possible

 

 

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Wow MammaP..I cried reading your response. I appreciate all your words of wisdom and advice. I trust other people who have been in my shoes. I really do. You all have saved my life and keep me hanging on. I will not make any decisions as I know I will not be happy with the results later. I really want to thank you from the bottom of my heart!

Started Prozac 20 MG March 2014-Sept 2014

New doctor switched me to Lexapro 10 MG and it helped from Sept 2014-Feb 2015 and then I felt the Lexapro wasn't helping as much so he changed the dose to 20 MG and I took that from Feb 2015-July 2015 when I decided to get off pills completely.I had to reinstate as I was feeling so bad and very pressured to go back on pills. My Dr put me on 50 MG zoloft and I took it for about a week..made me feel brain dead. Went down to 25 before I really learned the trouble of fast tapering..finally got a jewelry scale to properly weigh out my pills. Looking to just feel OK. Unsure where to go next.

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I feel like my brain is telling me what I do not want to hear..like that this is just a regular break up I should do because I'm unhappy but I don't want this. I want my relationship and want to be happy again. I hate these drugs.

Started Prozac 20 MG March 2014-Sept 2014

New doctor switched me to Lexapro 10 MG and it helped from Sept 2014-Feb 2015 and then I felt the Lexapro wasn't helping as much so he changed the dose to 20 MG and I took that from Feb 2015-July 2015 when I decided to get off pills completely.I had to reinstate as I was feeling so bad and very pressured to go back on pills. My Dr put me on 50 MG zoloft and I took it for about a week..made me feel brain dead. Went down to 25 before I really learned the trouble of fast tapering..finally got a jewelry scale to properly weigh out my pills. Looking to just feel OK. Unsure where to go next.

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  • Administrator

Coopergirl, please post in Lost my feelings for my boyfriend and want them back regarding relationship advice.

Edited by Altostrata
updated link

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

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Hi everyone- having another bad day..crying spells, bad thoughts and not happy. I want my relationship to be back to normal as it was before Lexapro messed me up. What I don't get is why was I able to meet my boyfriend and be happy as I ever have been and then after awhile on Lexapro lose my feelings all of the sudden. Everyone besides my boyfriend is telling me to get back on meds bc I am clinically depressed but I don't find that to be a solution as I already am two months off ssri. Please help.

Started Prozac 20 MG March 2014-Sept 2014

New doctor switched me to Lexapro 10 MG and it helped from Sept 2014-Feb 2015 and then I felt the Lexapro wasn't helping as much so he changed the dose to 20 MG and I took that from Feb 2015-July 2015 when I decided to get off pills completely.I had to reinstate as I was feeling so bad and very pressured to go back on pills. My Dr put me on 50 MG zoloft and I took it for about a week..made me feel brain dead. Went down to 25 before I really learned the trouble of fast tapering..finally got a jewelry scale to properly weigh out my pills. Looking to just feel OK. Unsure where to go next.

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Hello coopergirl, I believe what you are going through is withdrawal induced and not the real you since you have said that you were happy with your boyfriend before. Have you tried looking into mindfulness and meditation maybe that will help. Here is the thread: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/5873-mindfulness-and-acceptance/

Know that this too shall pass and you will regain your feelings when the time is right for your CNS to heal.

Celexa 20mg 2008-2012 for Social Anxiety

Failed attempt to stop reinstated

1 year taper skipping doses

Celexa free 12/2013

1/2014-5/2014 took 5 htp every other day

Failed Reinstatement 5mg of Celexa on 12/2014 for 5 days only

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