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Joannatm: sertraline withdrawal


joannatm

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So difficult for you but at least you will feel different and better off them and hopefully control feelings. I get worse when at home weird feeling of anxiety and being with kiddies on my own. Xxx

May 2003 prozac for six months after having first child. Came off taper slow. No withdrawals.

December 2009 10mg citalopram after second child.

January 2010 up to 20mg kinda helped. Not much.

July 2010 taper off within a month.

Side affects of tiredness tears. Doctor said I depressed still.

Oct 2010 Went back doctor they put me on sertraline 20mg and went to cbt therapy. Doctor kept upping it as wasn't feeling better to 200mg.

December 2014 felt better started to reduce by 4 tablets to 3 then to 2 then 1 and half. Four five weeks gap between. Stopped at 25mg in April 2015.7 months no meds.

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So blooming tired today head in fog. X

May 2003 prozac for six months after having first child. Came off taper slow. No withdrawals.

December 2009 10mg citalopram after second child.

January 2010 up to 20mg kinda helped. Not much.

July 2010 taper off within a month.

Side affects of tiredness tears. Doctor said I depressed still.

Oct 2010 Went back doctor they put me on sertraline 20mg and went to cbt therapy. Doctor kept upping it as wasn't feeling better to 200mg.

December 2014 felt better started to reduce by 4 tablets to 3 then to 2 then 1 and half. Four five weeks gap between. Stopped at 25mg in April 2015.7 months no meds.

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These waves are so blooming difficult. Why can't we just have NORNAL days. The anxiety and sadness is a nightmare at times then I get a few good days then back to waves. At lesst I'm getting windows which is good sign. X how's everyone doing?

May 2003 prozac for six months after having first child. Came off taper slow. No withdrawals.

December 2009 10mg citalopram after second child.

January 2010 up to 20mg kinda helped. Not much.

July 2010 taper off within a month.

Side affects of tiredness tears. Doctor said I depressed still.

Oct 2010 Went back doctor they put me on sertraline 20mg and went to cbt therapy. Doctor kept upping it as wasn't feeling better to 200mg.

December 2014 felt better started to reduce by 4 tablets to 3 then to 2 then 1 and half. Four five weeks gap between. Stopped at 25mg in April 2015.7 months no meds.

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SquirrellyGirl

I had fog head this morning, so groggy.  Mirtazapine is sedating, but I usually sleep well and wake feeling pretty refreshed.  Not this morning, took a good while to pull out of it.

 

I'm glad you are getting windows, Joanna!  I had a couple of good days and then had a mood swingy day last Thursday that took me by surprise.  

 

Are you now 10 months out from jumping off cit?  Month 10 is when I reinstated Effexor out of desperation, so I'd like to say "CONGRATULATIONS!!!" for making it this far!  I think you're rounding the corner now!

 

SG

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

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Yes 10 months is great but really thought I be back to norm by then. It's all this anxiety tears negative thoughts get to you and when you are feeling better your thinking is it coming back feels like lingering in background. I know I go on about same thing but just typing it makes you feel a little better as feel can't say to hubby all the time. Will it ever go hey.

 

You've got foggy head. That's strange feeling too. How's anxiety?

 

I feel like I should go back on then I get a lovely message from you and others encourage me to keep going. Thank u.

 

Hope you have a better day.

 

Jo x

May 2003 prozac for six months after having first child. Came off taper slow. No withdrawals.

December 2009 10mg citalopram after second child.

January 2010 up to 20mg kinda helped. Not much.

July 2010 taper off within a month.

Side affects of tiredness tears. Doctor said I depressed still.

Oct 2010 Went back doctor they put me on sertraline 20mg and went to cbt therapy. Doctor kept upping it as wasn't feeling better to 200mg.

December 2014 felt better started to reduce by 4 tablets to 3 then to 2 then 1 and half. Four five weeks gap between. Stopped at 25mg in April 2015.7 months no meds.

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Yeah it's like you have no control over this terror. It's like your mind has completely taken over.

Dec 2014 I tried Zoloft 25mg for one week (adverse reaction - extreme anxiety and felt like I was on an amphetamine). Dr. said to quit cold turkey, so I not only quit Zoloft but also 2 weeks of Xanax .25mg -- extreme dizziness, hyperarousal and anxiety began! On Jan. 29, 2015 my psychiatrist put me on new stuff and this is how my next 2 months and 7 days looked like (I was having the same bad reactions to all of these):Effexor XR 37.5mg (3 days) - throwing up, heart palpations, night tremors/convulsions or something where whole body shakes for a second, Prozac 10mg (15 days), Prozac 20mg (7 days) - internal restlessness, electric current through body/brain (not zaps), agitation, intense fear and could no longer nap at this point (still can't today because of this), Lexapro 5mg (4 days) - same as Prozac, a horror show...extreme internal agitation, Lexapro 7.5mg (2 days), Lexapro 10mg (16 days), Zoloft 12.5mg (3 days)...she said try it again since my blood relative does well on it, Zoloft 25mg (7 days) - same as before and getting worse!! Zoloft 50mg (6 days), Zoloft 25mg (4 days and then came off cold turkey on April 8, 2015). I used Xanax .25mg about 7 times per month through all of this until June 30, 2015 (my last benzo dose). Extreme anxiety, nervous system traumatized, mental akathisia, anger triggered by nothing but the brain totally going off on its own, feeling of a pressurized electric current going through me like my brain and body are trying to explode, stress reaction x10000 to everything, waking in terror lasting all day, fear, very sensitive, brain can't keep up, don't know what to do with myself, feeling like everything is going too fast and I can't keep up, helium head, deep depression like something is ripping out my soul, out of my mind, can hardly drive or be alone, cognitive issues, simple tasks are so complex and straining, feel disturbed because the brain can't process anything right even though your brain tries so hard and it makes you go mad, episodes of deep anguish with a sick toxic poison feeling (like you have some unknown virus).

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SquirrellyGirl

Pros and cons either way.  I often wonder, had I known that what I was experiencing was due to Effexor WD, would I have been able to tolerate it and push forward?  After all, I'd put 10 months in!  Now I've started over, essentially.  I am focusing on the mirtazapine taper, nudging the Effexor down now by minute amounts now and again when I weigh my doses.  So, I've got all this time ahead of me just to get all the way off, and HOPE that the slow taper will mean that recovery after I finish will be minimal, but there is worry that withdrawal will happen again anyway.  That is why I offer you encouragement.  IF you can handle it, you've got your time in and are that much closer to being done with withdrawal  

 

Only you can say whether or not you can handle it.  If you decide to reinstate a small amount, it is no failure on your part, really, and nobody will judge you!

 

They say that reinstatement is less likely to work so far out, but I was a lucky one.  37.5 mg fixed me up within an hour, which is pretty scary, really.  I mean, my nervous system was so sluggish about coming back on line that 37.5 mg wasn't too much.  I'd been on it for 12 years, though.  Had I known what I know now, I would have taken a fraction of that to see if it would help, and if you decide to try it, that's what I'd recommend.  That way you have that much less to come off slowly.

 

I hope today is a better day for you, Joanna!

 

SG

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

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Bet you frustrated about the whole thing. I do have lots of windows throughout the day some days and then bad waves. Like you said I've come this far struggling I got to stay strong and carry on as don't want to start all over again. It's websites like this and people like you that keep us going as it can be a lonely place feeling like this. I'm not depressed but anxiety negative thoughts my main concern. Hoping as time goes it it will fade.

 

How you today?

 

How you KT you having real bad time of it. You still completely off sertraline or have u gone back on? X

May 2003 prozac for six months after having first child. Came off taper slow. No withdrawals.

December 2009 10mg citalopram after second child.

January 2010 up to 20mg kinda helped. Not much.

July 2010 taper off within a month.

Side affects of tiredness tears. Doctor said I depressed still.

Oct 2010 Went back doctor they put me on sertraline 20mg and went to cbt therapy. Doctor kept upping it as wasn't feeling better to 200mg.

December 2014 felt better started to reduce by 4 tablets to 3 then to 2 then 1 and half. Four five weeks gap between. Stopped at 25mg in April 2015.7 months no meds.

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SquirrellyGirl

You have a good attitude, Joanna, and that will get you through.  I know when the fear/anxiety hits it is really hard to be talked out of it, but I have found a lot of comfort in the teachings of Eckhart Tolle, because I learned from him that the thoughts create the suffering, and they arise from the egoic thought "form," or Pain Body, which is like an entity that lives within us and is most active when we are unconscious.  Therefore, when it acts up, we can notice it, observe it.  Doing so takes its power away.  I love how he says that it doesn't like to be noticed LOL!  by stepping back from those thoughts, observing them, and not fighting them but accepting that this is WD and it will pass, it truly does take the power out of it.  If you haven't listened to Eckhart yet, you might find this helpful:

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/10992-eckhart-tolle-the-pain-body-and-mental-suffering-during-withdrawal/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RwNk76JK_oc

 

Granted, our mind is affected by the imbalance of WD so isn't very rational, but this stuff still helps me.  Their are others who espouse the same kind of knowledge so who ever does it for you, doesn't matter - it's all good :-)

 

Me, I've been having quite a lovely window since last Friday or so, feeling less preoccupied with withdrawal and tapering, more connected, no negativity and motivated to tackle some projects around the place, so enjoying that!

 

SG

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

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Nope, I didn't reinstate. The first SSRI destroyed my nervous system and brain so there is no going back. I think you will get better very soon.

Dec 2014 I tried Zoloft 25mg for one week (adverse reaction - extreme anxiety and felt like I was on an amphetamine). Dr. said to quit cold turkey, so I not only quit Zoloft but also 2 weeks of Xanax .25mg -- extreme dizziness, hyperarousal and anxiety began! On Jan. 29, 2015 my psychiatrist put me on new stuff and this is how my next 2 months and 7 days looked like (I was having the same bad reactions to all of these):Effexor XR 37.5mg (3 days) - throwing up, heart palpations, night tremors/convulsions or something where whole body shakes for a second, Prozac 10mg (15 days), Prozac 20mg (7 days) - internal restlessness, electric current through body/brain (not zaps), agitation, intense fear and could no longer nap at this point (still can't today because of this), Lexapro 5mg (4 days) - same as Prozac, a horror show...extreme internal agitation, Lexapro 7.5mg (2 days), Lexapro 10mg (16 days), Zoloft 12.5mg (3 days)...she said try it again since my blood relative does well on it, Zoloft 25mg (7 days) - same as before and getting worse!! Zoloft 50mg (6 days), Zoloft 25mg (4 days and then came off cold turkey on April 8, 2015). I used Xanax .25mg about 7 times per month through all of this until June 30, 2015 (my last benzo dose). Extreme anxiety, nervous system traumatized, mental akathisia, anger triggered by nothing but the brain totally going off on its own, feeling of a pressurized electric current going through me like my brain and body are trying to explode, stress reaction x10000 to everything, waking in terror lasting all day, fear, very sensitive, brain can't keep up, don't know what to do with myself, feeling like everything is going too fast and I can't keep up, helium head, deep depression like something is ripping out my soul, out of my mind, can hardly drive or be alone, cognitive issues, simple tasks are so complex and straining, feel disturbed because the brain can't process anything right even though your brain tries so hard and it makes you go mad, episodes of deep anguish with a sick toxic poison feeling (like you have some unknown virus).

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Thank you I will listen to it tomorrow. Sounds really interesting too.

 

Kr I'm totally gutted for you that your having awful time of it. How is your daughter. You will get longer windows you will I'm sure. X

May 2003 prozac for six months after having first child. Came off taper slow. No withdrawals.

December 2009 10mg citalopram after second child.

January 2010 up to 20mg kinda helped. Not much.

July 2010 taper off within a month.

Side affects of tiredness tears. Doctor said I depressed still.

Oct 2010 Went back doctor they put me on sertraline 20mg and went to cbt therapy. Doctor kept upping it as wasn't feeling better to 200mg.

December 2014 felt better started to reduce by 4 tablets to 3 then to 2 then 1 and half. Four five weeks gap between. Stopped at 25mg in April 2015.7 months no meds.

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  • 3 weeks later...

Update 11 months off ....I've had another great two weeks or so, odd days of negative thoughts and tears anxious distance but most days good... then BANG I've had terrible flu temperature and now today negative and don't feel I here looking at my children as though I'm not theres, feel I'm waiting for something to happen. Weird horrible sensation. Is this WD symptom. As feels too strong and real.xxc

May 2003 prozac for six months after having first child. Came off taper slow. No withdrawals.

December 2009 10mg citalopram after second child.

January 2010 up to 20mg kinda helped. Not much.

July 2010 taper off within a month.

Side affects of tiredness tears. Doctor said I depressed still.

Oct 2010 Went back doctor they put me on sertraline 20mg and went to cbt therapy. Doctor kept upping it as wasn't feeling better to 200mg.

December 2014 felt better started to reduce by 4 tablets to 3 then to 2 then 1 and half. Four five weeks gap between. Stopped at 25mg in April 2015.7 months no meds.

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Terrible today. Feel not on this planet. Feel like I'm bidding my time and waiting for something to happen. Very strange feeling. X

May 2003 prozac for six months after having first child. Came off taper slow. No withdrawals.

December 2009 10mg citalopram after second child.

January 2010 up to 20mg kinda helped. Not much.

July 2010 taper off within a month.

Side affects of tiredness tears. Doctor said I depressed still.

Oct 2010 Went back doctor they put me on sertraline 20mg and went to cbt therapy. Doctor kept upping it as wasn't feeling better to 200mg.

December 2014 felt better started to reduce by 4 tablets to 3 then to 2 then 1 and half. Four five weeks gap between. Stopped at 25mg in April 2015.7 months no meds.

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  • Moderator Emeritus
SquirrellyGirl

I'm sorry to hear you are in a wave, Joanna.  I would say yes, this is withdrawal. Had you ever felt this way before withdrawal?  You are at almost 11 months off and definitely folks still have waves this far out, unfortunately.  Time for some self-care and self-compassion :-)  Try not to judge yourself or the withdrawal, and see this as a sign that your nervous system is still actively repairing.  Is there any music you could listen to right now that would make you feel better?  I'm currently a little wavy myself and listening to my Beck station on Pandora.  

 

I was never a big fan of classical music, but someone from another forum suggested that it can actually be helpful (the right kind, of course - not anything too moody!).  I sometimes will listen on the radio while driving, and have found myself enjoying certain pieces, sort of a meditative process listening to the different instruments coming in and telling a musical story :-)

 

I hope this one breaks soon for you, and many hugs to you!

 

SG

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

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I have felt like this many times before then it fades. Horrible feeling makes me very anxious. I try get on with work to keep mind going and it wears off. Doesn't help having awful cold too. I ml try music like you said. How you feeling lately? Can waves really go on after a year being off. Gets ya down hey xx

May 2003 prozac for six months after having first child. Came off taper slow. No withdrawals.

December 2009 10mg citalopram after second child.

January 2010 up to 20mg kinda helped. Not much.

July 2010 taper off within a month.

Side affects of tiredness tears. Doctor said I depressed still.

Oct 2010 Went back doctor they put me on sertraline 20mg and went to cbt therapy. Doctor kept upping it as wasn't feeling better to 200mg.

December 2014 felt better started to reduce by 4 tablets to 3 then to 2 then 1 and half. Four five weeks gap between. Stopped at 25mg in April 2015.7 months no meds.

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I never felt like this before tablets only since being on and coming off them. X

May 2003 prozac for six months after having first child. Came off taper slow. No withdrawals.

December 2009 10mg citalopram after second child.

January 2010 up to 20mg kinda helped. Not much.

July 2010 taper off within a month.

Side affects of tiredness tears. Doctor said I depressed still.

Oct 2010 Went back doctor they put me on sertraline 20mg and went to cbt therapy. Doctor kept upping it as wasn't feeling better to 200mg.

December 2014 felt better started to reduce by 4 tablets to 3 then to 2 then 1 and half. Four five weeks gap between. Stopped at 25mg in April 2015.7 months no meds.

Link to post

Can it really take a year or more for brain to adjust. I been having lots long windows then this weird emotional wave of distance and anxiety. When will things be norm again. So depressing. Husband keeps saying stop dwelling but my brain can't help it x

May 2003 prozac for six months after having first child. Came off taper slow. No withdrawals.

December 2009 10mg citalopram after second child.

January 2010 up to 20mg kinda helped. Not much.

July 2010 taper off within a month.

Side affects of tiredness tears. Doctor said I depressed still.

Oct 2010 Went back doctor they put me on sertraline 20mg and went to cbt therapy. Doctor kept upping it as wasn't feeling better to 200mg.

December 2014 felt better started to reduce by 4 tablets to 3 then to 2 then 1 and half. Four five weeks gap between. Stopped at 25mg in April 2015.7 months no meds.

Link to post

J .      Unfortunately , it can take a while .  Sometimes, longer.   The way I am looking at it now is , it's a very small part of your life in  the long - term , but now that you know the  " truth " , it has saved you a " world of pain", in  the " long term " .  If you had not found out about this , you would be oblivious , and  " hurtling " towards definite  ill - health , if not  a  " total"  break down .

In the " grand scheme of things " , a year is not a long time . You will get through it , and be wiser & more knowledgeable , about these things, in the future. Try and look on this as a positive, if you possibly can .

Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014

 

                                                  Psych Drug - free since May 2014
.
         

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How long have you been going through it? Just when think I'm getting on track and get hopes up it crashes on me. Suppose one good thing my pnd not come back as I was a mess all day every day. A year is so long maybe it's the way I'm wired and not wd

May 2003 prozac for six months after having first child. Came off taper slow. No withdrawals.

December 2009 10mg citalopram after second child.

January 2010 up to 20mg kinda helped. Not much.

July 2010 taper off within a month.

Side affects of tiredness tears. Doctor said I depressed still.

Oct 2010 Went back doctor they put me on sertraline 20mg and went to cbt therapy. Doctor kept upping it as wasn't feeling better to 200mg.

December 2014 felt better started to reduce by 4 tablets to 3 then to 2 then 1 and half. Four five weeks gap between. Stopped at 25mg in April 2015.7 months no meds.

Link to post

22 months and counting .   :)    That's " windows and waves " .    It will get better.   Everyone " heals" at their own rate.  You're in a wave , which is never easy . 

Hang in there.  It will get better.  The timeline varies for everyone.

Ali

Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014

 

                                                  Psych Drug - free since May 2014
.
         

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  • Moderator Emeritus
SquirrellyGirl

Joanna, your neuro-emoting which makes it very hard to cope with what is, I know.  That is also part of WD.  But you said that you have been having long windows, which is AWESOME!  There are many here who weren't so fortunate, and would be envious of you, waves and all!  

 

Danged hubby is right ;-)  Acceptance is hard to find at these times, but it is really the most sane thing you can do.  Just remember, your thoughts cause your suffering (thank you, Ekchart Tolle) so engaging in distressing trains of thought about withdrawal will just make it all worse.  Do not journey to the future, fretting over "what if this just keeps going on and on?!"  When I get into that head space, I repeat this mantra:  "I am healing, and I can take one moment at a time." Try some guided meditations, too, along with the uplifting/soothing music <3

 

This wave will end, it really will!

 

Many hugs to you!

SG

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

Link to post

Hi Joahna! Just found your thread and decided that we should be friends;) I was put on lexapro for post partum depression and stayed on it for 20 months. Just like you I have many good days but just as many bad ones. I am now 8 months off. I keep telling myself that this will pass but frankly I getting so emotionally exhausted. I have a two year old and I too sometimes feel like she is not mine. The thoughts of leaving my family and my awesome husband come to me everyday when I am in the wave. I also feel trapped in this life as if there is no escape from what I am and what I feel. It's not that bad when there is a window but waves are getting to me and I just find it harder to deal with them. Lost of ppl saying accepting your feelings and living in the now helps. And it does. But when you have to function and perform as a mother I find it's hard to put them in practice. Sometimes I think I should not be around my kid, I am so afraid I will screw her up with my anger, tears, anxiety. I hope it helps you to know your are not alone. It sure helps me.

Nov 2013 - July 2015 - 2 years on 10 mg of CIPRALEX 

"weaned off" in 2 months even though doctor said I can quit in 2 weeks (haha) 

No physical withdrawal symptoms 

Emotional anxiety, depression withdrawal since August 2015. On and off 

Link to post

Hi Olivia

 

Yes it would be nice to make friends and be able to talk about our waves windows. I do have those same feelings when going through a wave. I feel so sad and distance towards my family and anxious tearful. I don't feel excited about anything and it really does upset me. I try my hardest in those times to focus on activities to keep me busy but it always seems to crop up. Co stance negative thoughts. On the window good side I have really lovely days where there are no thoughts but I still feel it lingering in background. I normally get bad before and after period for a week or so then calms down. We will get there I know as I was much worse at beginning. It's just a slow process. Big hugs hun xxx

May 2003 prozac for six months after having first child. Came off taper slow. No withdrawals.

December 2009 10mg citalopram after second child.

January 2010 up to 20mg kinda helped. Not much.

July 2010 taper off within a month.

Side affects of tiredness tears. Doctor said I depressed still.

Oct 2010 Went back doctor they put me on sertraline 20mg and went to cbt therapy. Doctor kept upping it as wasn't feeling better to 200mg.

December 2014 felt better started to reduce by 4 tablets to 3 then to 2 then 1 and half. Four five weeks gap between. Stopped at 25mg in April 2015.7 months no meds.

Link to post

How you doing lately? I've had a few better days. Xxx

May 2003 prozac for six months after having first child. Came off taper slow. No withdrawals.

December 2009 10mg citalopram after second child.

January 2010 up to 20mg kinda helped. Not much.

July 2010 taper off within a month.

Side affects of tiredness tears. Doctor said I depressed still.

Oct 2010 Went back doctor they put me on sertraline 20mg and went to cbt therapy. Doctor kept upping it as wasn't feeling better to 200mg.

December 2014 felt better started to reduce by 4 tablets to 3 then to 2 then 1 and half. Four five weeks gap between. Stopped at 25mg in April 2015.7 months no meds.

Link to post

Oh do I feel desperate today. Why oh why I really think wow getting better then happens again. A year April can't believe it. How is everyone doing as not heard from anyone. Hoping you having lots windows. Xx

May 2003 prozac for six months after having first child. Came off taper slow. No withdrawals.

December 2009 10mg citalopram after second child.

January 2010 up to 20mg kinda helped. Not much.

July 2010 taper off within a month.

Side affects of tiredness tears. Doctor said I depressed still.

Oct 2010 Went back doctor they put me on sertraline 20mg and went to cbt therapy. Doctor kept upping it as wasn't feeling better to 200mg.

December 2014 felt better started to reduce by 4 tablets to 3 then to 2 then 1 and half. Four five weeks gap between. Stopped at 25mg in April 2015.7 months no meds.

Link to post
  • Moderator Emeritus
SquirrellyGirl

Hi Joanna, 

 

Ugh, it is a grind!  I"m sorry it is another wavy day for you!

 

Holding fairly steady here.  I get to a point where I feel like I should really be getting on with life, but then posts like yours are a reminder that I'm still on the roller coaster, so to be kind to myself and not feel guilty for still being in a holding pattern.

 

You've got a year under your belt (well, next month but close enough, so congratulations!!

 

SG

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

Link to post

Wow so pleased you holding steady. My be you could drop again if steady. That's great.

 

I'm so sorry I feel every few weeks I'm repeating myself. Get so upset with myself when a wave. I just feel need to air my feelings as can't at home any more. X

May 2003 prozac for six months after having first child. Came off taper slow. No withdrawals.

December 2009 10mg citalopram after second child.

January 2010 up to 20mg kinda helped. Not much.

July 2010 taper off within a month.

Side affects of tiredness tears. Doctor said I depressed still.

Oct 2010 Went back doctor they put me on sertraline 20mg and went to cbt therapy. Doctor kept upping it as wasn't feeling better to 200mg.

December 2014 felt better started to reduce by 4 tablets to 3 then to 2 then 1 and half. Four five weeks gap between. Stopped at 25mg in April 2015.7 months no meds.

Link to post
  • Moderator Emeritus
SquirrellyGirl

That's one of the benefits of this place, to have a safe place to share what you are going through when maybe it doesn't feel so safe to do so at home :-)

 

I'm going to hold my Mirt a bit longer as I just got switched to making a liquid, need to be sure nothing crops up from the change before commencing tapering.   It's easy to want to rush onward, but I'm trying hard to not be impulsive and set myself up for success.

 

Don't be hard on yourself, Joanna - you are taking on a big challenge getting off meds, and need to be kind with yourself.  There is nothing to judge in how you are handling things, no right or wrong responses.  One moment at a time!

 

SG

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

Link to post

Hey Joanna

I'm in the same boat as you. 1 year off. Windows last for about 10 days then 3 weeks or so of waves, intense anxiety and depressed thoughts. Work is hard. Family and friends distant. Can't believe I'm caught in this hell. So alarming the medical community blind sided us like this.

Glad I found this site. It showed me I'm not crazy.... Just my body readjusting. I'm trying to keep it together without doing too much damage to my life. My hell started 4 years ago when my Zoloft pooped out. Then Drs put me on every medication they could think of.

I'm walking, swimming, meditating, therapy and magnesium and Omega 3.

I'm waving right now. 10 days in. Bummer

 

LJ

18 years on Zoloft then it quit working and started giving me anxiety.

Nothing else has worked for me at all

prescribed: pristiq, lexapro , Abilify with zoloft, Remeron, Lithium, Vybriid, Prozac, lamactil, Celexa, Paxil and Luvox

TAPERS

Zoloft - switched to Paxil after 2 week taper - big mistake

Paxil - 10% Reduction over 20 weeks. Started Luvox on week 18

Luvox - too fast of taper directed by PDoc- 25% reduction over 6 weeks because of short time on- 4 months, never worked

-tapered off everything except Lithium 300mg by April 11, 2015

Link to post

Nice to meet you lucyjed and to also know someone else feels the same after a year. Sounds like you going through hell too. Why did you go on them in first place? Mine was post natal depression. I sometimes think now it's just me now and not WD. It's so frustrating when you have few good days or a week or do then BANG it hits again. How can WD take this long. I know emotional neurons need to heal but can't get my head round it. X

May 2003 prozac for six months after having first child. Came off taper slow. No withdrawals.

December 2009 10mg citalopram after second child.

January 2010 up to 20mg kinda helped. Not much.

July 2010 taper off within a month.

Side affects of tiredness tears. Doctor said I depressed still.

Oct 2010 Went back doctor they put me on sertraline 20mg and went to cbt therapy. Doctor kept upping it as wasn't feeling better to 200mg.

December 2014 felt better started to reduce by 4 tablets to 3 then to 2 then 1 and half. Four five weeks gap between. Stopped at 25mg in April 2015.7 months no meds.

Link to post

Do you get extreme doom feelings? And througout the day symptoms fluctuate?

Dec 2014 I tried Zoloft 25mg for one week (adverse reaction - extreme anxiety and felt like I was on an amphetamine). Dr. said to quit cold turkey, so I not only quit Zoloft but also 2 weeks of Xanax .25mg -- extreme dizziness, hyperarousal and anxiety began! On Jan. 29, 2015 my psychiatrist put me on new stuff and this is how my next 2 months and 7 days looked like (I was having the same bad reactions to all of these):Effexor XR 37.5mg (3 days) - throwing up, heart palpations, night tremors/convulsions or something where whole body shakes for a second, Prozac 10mg (15 days), Prozac 20mg (7 days) - internal restlessness, electric current through body/brain (not zaps), agitation, intense fear and could no longer nap at this point (still can't today because of this), Lexapro 5mg (4 days) - same as Prozac, a horror show...extreme internal agitation, Lexapro 7.5mg (2 days), Lexapro 10mg (16 days), Zoloft 12.5mg (3 days)...she said try it again since my blood relative does well on it, Zoloft 25mg (7 days) - same as before and getting worse!! Zoloft 50mg (6 days), Zoloft 25mg (4 days and then came off cold turkey on April 8, 2015). I used Xanax .25mg about 7 times per month through all of this until June 30, 2015 (my last benzo dose). Extreme anxiety, nervous system traumatized, mental akathisia, anger triggered by nothing but the brain totally going off on its own, feeling of a pressurized electric current going through me like my brain and body are trying to explode, stress reaction x10000 to everything, waking in terror lasting all day, fear, very sensitive, brain can't keep up, don't know what to do with myself, feeling like everything is going too fast and I can't keep up, helium head, deep depression like something is ripping out my soul, out of my mind, can hardly drive or be alone, cognitive issues, simple tasks are so complex and straining, feel disturbed because the brain can't process anything right even though your brain tries so hard and it makes you go mad, episodes of deep anguish with a sick toxic poison feeling (like you have some unknown virus).

Link to post

Yes very much. Worse in morning then try and be positive then terrible negative thoughts on and off especially when home. Havw you had any windows lately I've had a few. Maybe I'm bipolar but not sure what that like. Xx

May 2003 prozac for six months after having first child. Came off taper slow. No withdrawals.

December 2009 10mg citalopram after second child.

January 2010 up to 20mg kinda helped. Not much.

July 2010 taper off within a month.

Side affects of tiredness tears. Doctor said I depressed still.

Oct 2010 Went back doctor they put me on sertraline 20mg and went to cbt therapy. Doctor kept upping it as wasn't feeling better to 200mg.

December 2014 felt better started to reduce by 4 tablets to 3 then to 2 then 1 and half. Four five weeks gap between. Stopped at 25mg in April 2015.7 months no meds.

Link to post
  • Moderator Emeritus
SquirrellyGirl

Nice to meet you lucyjed and to also know someone else feels the same after a year. Sounds like you going through hell too. Why did you go on them in first place? Mine was post natal depression. I sometimes think now it's just me now and not WD. It's so frustrating when you have few good days or a week or do then BANG it hits again. How can WD take this long. I know emotional neurons need to heal but can't get my head round it. X

 

Joanna, I think it is the fact that the neurons remodeled and down regulated, paring back receptors - it is basically brain damage, though don't take that to mean it will never be repaired.  And it isn't just the serotonin receptors.  Changes in one neurotransmitter system cause changes in others like dopamine, GABA and norepinephrine - they interact with each other, so all those need to heal as well.  And when the body finally up regulates/repairs one a bit, now the others have to respond in kind and it probably causes another wave.  All these little adjustments going on in response to one thing changing.

 

Think about people with brain injuries who can't walk but are relearning, or can't speak but are relearning.  It takes a very long time for their brains to remodel and recover these abilities.   For some reason, our nerves respond very quickly to the presence of the drug, but very slowly to rebuild when the drug is gone.  The slow taper is meant to help us make small adjustments back to baseline, but when you come off too fast it just sets all the balls in motion.

 

Hang in there!

SG

Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac.  Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002
Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history.  Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots!
Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off.  Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep.

June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened!  Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015.

Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month.

12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 

Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18:  2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor

 

My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

Link to post

Thank you so much you are so helpful and kind and explain in such a detailed and helpful way. I just can't get my head round it at mo that's all. Trouble is when on sertraline I felt this way all the time so doctor upped it and I just put up with side effects so it's been six years and I can't remember what I was like before now and it frightens me x

May 2003 prozac for six months after having first child. Came off taper slow. No withdrawals.

December 2009 10mg citalopram after second child.

January 2010 up to 20mg kinda helped. Not much.

July 2010 taper off within a month.

Side affects of tiredness tears. Doctor said I depressed still.

Oct 2010 Went back doctor they put me on sertraline 20mg and went to cbt therapy. Doctor kept upping it as wasn't feeling better to 200mg.

December 2014 felt better started to reduce by 4 tablets to 3 then to 2 then 1 and half. Four five weeks gap between. Stopped at 25mg in April 2015.7 months no meds.

Link to post

OMG awful. Had every emotion under the sun like old days. Lower than low and gutted as out with friends and just wanted to cry and 3 gen had a thought I need to go hospital. What happened I was doing good fairly good. On pmt doesn't help but hate this feeling z

May 2003 prozac for six months after having first child. Came off taper slow. No withdrawals.

December 2009 10mg citalopram after second child.

January 2010 up to 20mg kinda helped. Not much.

July 2010 taper off within a month.

Side affects of tiredness tears. Doctor said I depressed still.

Oct 2010 Went back doctor they put me on sertraline 20mg and went to cbt therapy. Doctor kept upping it as wasn't feeling better to 200mg.

December 2014 felt better started to reduce by 4 tablets to 3 then to 2 then 1 and half. Four five weeks gap between. Stopped at 25mg in April 2015.7 months no meds.

Link to post

Hi Joanna

I'm sorry you're not feeling well. Don't read too much into it. It's just simply your brain and nervous system adapting themselves to life without drugs.

 

I started taking Zolift in 1994 after being fired from an aggressively stressful job. I was sad, fatigued and anxious and was directed to a therapist who introduced me to a psychiatrist. Like others, He told me that i had a seratonin imbalance so I need to take the ssri . He was the head psychiatrist for the Peace Corps so of course he was credible....

The drugs were also new at the time . Anyway, the Z worked, got me better then , but through the years lost its efficacy .

In 2012 it quit working and all the meds later prescibed made me much much worse.

 

Perhaps there's a spiritual and character growth silver lining in this. I like to hope that when we are well and thriving possibly we will be more enlightened human beings. As suffering is often a catalyst for growth in many religions and doctrines.

 

Let's hope for quick recoveries and silver linings.

You'll be OK. As will I .

 

LJ

18 years on Zoloft then it quit working and started giving me anxiety.

Nothing else has worked for me at all

prescribed: pristiq, lexapro , Abilify with zoloft, Remeron, Lithium, Vybriid, Prozac, lamactil, Celexa, Paxil and Luvox

TAPERS

Zoloft - switched to Paxil after 2 week taper - big mistake

Paxil - 10% Reduction over 20 weeks. Started Luvox on week 18

Luvox - too fast of taper directed by PDoc- 25% reduction over 6 weeks because of short time on- 4 months, never worked

-tapered off everything except Lithium 300mg by April 11, 2015

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