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nick1990

nick1990: citalopram crap

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Altostrata
33 minutes ago, nick1990 said:

It’s the hottest summer on record here and constant glaring sunshine. Could this have something to do with the increase in WD symptoms ?

 

Yes, you may be sensitive to the heat.

 

Do you want to try updosing 0.5mg?

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nick1990

@Altostrata it has been 16 months since I stopped tapering. Is that not a bit risky ? 

 

Honestly, an updose had not even crossed my mind. I don’t feel the symptoms are bad enough , it’s just the current pattern of consistent symptoms that is troublesome. 

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nick1990

Lol ! Thanks @brassmonkey 

 

What do do you think Tom ? Just keep holding at the current dose ? I’m really not keen on the idea of an updose. Especially considering symptoms were definitely worse this time last year, so there has been improvement, without a doubt. 

 

Moving to Melbourne is happening in 3.5 months and I don’t want to rock the boat too much for that as it will undoubtedly involve some level of stress. 

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brassmonkey

Glad you enjoyed it Nick.

 

I'm thinking there is a large situational element that is compounded by WD burnout. Holding for that long can take a toll just by itself.  If your symptoms aren't debilitating then I don't see a need for an updose. An updose is different than a reinstatement so doesn't have the same time frame restrictions.  Seems to me that the long hold may be starting to throw you into poopout. So I think some small reductions are in order. I'd start with a 5% Brassmonkey Slide and see how that goes. (1.25% a week for four weeks and hold an additional two weeks).  I think the upcoming move is very important for you and you are in kinda a holding pattern until that happens.  Once that gets rolling there will be a lot of distractions which should help.  Speaking of distractions, hows the tiny house project?

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nick1990

Thanks Tom , I do feel like there is a large situational element at play too . The waiting, the holding , the feeling of not progressing. 

 

So are you saying to wait until I get over there and then slowly resume with the taper ? I don’t feel like i should be tapering just yet - to me it’s just that I’m not mentally in a good enough space right now. As well as having these uncomfortable symptoms coming and going . 

 

The tiny house hasn’t been completed yet. It’s been too hot and I haven’t had the energy to be doing the physical work on it. I’ll be having a calm next few months so hoping to get most of it done before the move :) 

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brassmonkey

I was thinking to go ahead and start the taper now, but you're the one in contact with your body and if it doesn't feel right, then yea, wait for it.

 

I really like the idea of "tiny houses".  We've been throwing around the idea of getting another RV, we sold our old on a few years ago and really miss it.  But then we get thinking and planning and researching and always come back to the idea of building one ourselves. Yet another project to contemplate.

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nick1990

Thanks Tom , I’ll see what happens in the coming weeks. I have to say , im a bit confused . I’ve had WD symptoms for over a year now , how does it suddenly morph into tolerance ? I’ve read your poopout topic , but still am not sure. Is there something I’m missing ? 

 

I think the RV is a great idea. When I’m older and wealthier (maybe) , I plan on buying an RV, I love the whole idea of them. Creating your own one would be amazing ! 

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nick1990

Thanks @brassmonkey, I’ll see what happens in the coming weeks. I have to say , im a bit confused . I’ve had WD symptoms for over a year now , how does it suddenly morph into tolerance ? I’ve read your poopout topic , but still am not sure. Is there something I’m missing ? 

 

I think the RV is a great idea. When I’m older and wealthier (maybe) , I plan on buying an RV, I love the whole idea of them. Creating your own one would be amazing ! 

 

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nick1990

Hey @Altostrata and @brassmonkey

 

Im sorry to be a pain at the moment, I’m just feeling confused.

 

Alto, you suggested a possible updose, suggesting these are WD symptoms and Brass, you suggested I resume tapering as I may be in tolerance. 

 

I need to be very clear here. I have what FEELS like WD symptoms. 

I did not feel like this when I was on a steady dose of Citalopram, (even at 45mg) other than emotional blunting, the drugs didn’t seem to create many issues. 

 

The symptoms are not intense. They are mild to moderate at worst, but just pretty consistent. I was having many periods (sometimes weeks long) of feeling normal and free of symptoms over the last few months. But still had waves when I overdid  things etc. 

 

This consistent wave pattern seemed to start after I was working a relatively physical job for 6 weeks.

It wasn’t daily work, but was 8 hours on my feet and carrying heavy loads. At times I would almost start crying I was so tired. 

 

I quit over a month ago , due to how exhausted I was getting and not able to surf or do any other physical activities due to the exhaustion. 

The waves have been pretty consistent since around that time. 

 

I guess what im really trying to figure out is , are these waves and just a part of the Stabilization process ? If they are , I can wait them out (im still very functional, it’s more a neuro emotional aspect).

 

Or does this sound more like a tolerance issue ? And only tapering will make it better ? My fear is that I’ve waited this long to stabilise and don’t want to rock the boat by tapering when my body isn’t ready. 

 

Thank you both for the time you put in here. 

 

Nick . 

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Adili13

Hey Nick,

 

I’m not a mod or anything, but here’s my two cents. I personally don’t really feel like it’s likely to feel 100 percent symptom-free once you’ve started the tapering process and are still on the drug. I do think most people come to a very stable place if they wait long enough, but I think most people will have symptoms, to some extent, while still on the drug and after starting a taper. I think starting a taper destabilizes the nervous system, and it is very difficult for it to become 100 percent stable while still on the drug. I think it does it’s best, and you see symptom reduction and marked improvements, but I’m not sure you ever feel like symptoms are gone. I think total and complete healing happens once off the drug entirely, and even a while after that. Tapering is simply incremental healing, meaning you will probably still feel symptoms all the way through it. I could be totally wrong and welcome mods to correct me, of course. I just feel like what you’re describing, after 16 months, is probably WDNormal, since, as you say, you’re still functional and able to do things. 


Adili

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nick1990

Hey @Altostrataand @brassmonkey

 

I was wondering whether you got a chance to look at my last post.

 

I have not been feeling well today. About 15 mins ago I got hit with a pretty intense anxiety, hot flushes and have been having split second depressive thoughts too. I’ve done nothing much but rest over the last few days. It just seems to keep going, this wave.

 

I really don’t want to do anything and just wait it out. Is this normal in WD ? To have such a non linear spike in symptoms? 

 

Im not freaking out too much, I’m just noticing what I’m noticing and getting on with my life as best as I can. 

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nick1990

could this be a sudden reaction or sudden tolerance? I’ve felt very similar to this before when dealing with WD symptoms -

It’s more that they’re coming out of no where after tapering over a year ago. Could this very well be just more delayed WD symptoms @Altostrata

Im ok sitting with the symptoms waiting for them to go , but I’m just freaking out a bit.

 

More than anything , I want to move to Melbourne in May. It’s so important to me - but I’m worrying that if I’m going through an adverse reaction or tolerance then I need to taper now and that will cause too much instability to go to Melbourne to be with my girlfriend. 

I hope this is just WD symptoms -that I need to hold and wait out for a little longer before tapering.  Does it seem likely that is the case?

 

thanks so much everyone. 

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Altostrata

Is it still very hot where you live? You could have some degree of heat intolerance from your earlier destabilization. Your nervous system is sensitive this way.

 

An updose by 0.5mg does not suggest these are withdrawal symptoms or that you are "in tolerance" from 22mg citalopram. It suggests you might be more stable with a little more drug.

 

You might do what you can to stay out of the heat and the sun, and let this rough spot pass. Are you prone to health anxiety?

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nick1990

Thanks for your prompt reply @Altostrata.

It is still around 30 degrees (86 Fahrenheit) and humid most days. It’s uncomfortable at best. 

 

Is there not a lot of risk involved in an Updose? I’ve read so many accounts of people updosing and creating a real problem for themselves. 

 

Do you think that staying out of the heat and just waiting for this to ease would be the best option? 

 

I am prone to health anxiety for sure. Nearly every type of anxiety haha.. 

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nick1990

Well, have been feeling a lot better the last few days .

More energy , far better mood - just a lot more normal. 

I’m away on a little holiday with the family and it’s just so nice being somewhere other than home. 

Thought I should share.

 

Cheers, 

Nick. 

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Adili13

That’s awesome, Nick! Happy to hear your wave seems good be subsiding! I hope you have a great trip!!!

 

Anthony 

Seems to be*

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nick1990

Thank you Anthony :) and thank you for your previous response too. 

I think you’re totally right about having some sort of symptoms whilst still on the drug. 

 

As as of today, I am restarting my taper. A 1.5% reduction. And we’ll reassess in a week and continue with a slide most likely.

 

Also of note, It was pointed out to me by a friend on here, that I should maybe get my thyroid checked. 

I have an appointment in a couple of days.

I will report back once bloods are in. 

 

 

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Adili13

Wow, Nick! That’s exciting! I’m happy you’ve decided to take the plunge and start up again. I think you’ll do well! 
 

I think getting your thyroid checked is a good idea. There are always other health issues that could be compounding WD. I got my blood tested and while back and was low on both b12 and vitamin d. Unfortunately, I can’t handle those supplements, but if you haven’t been tested for that, I’d recommend that as well.

 

Ant

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nick1990

Hi all. 

 

Well its been pretty uneventful since the last reduction I did. Was nearly 5 days ago and haven’t noticed any worsening in symptoms. 

 

On another note, I saw a GP on Friday and he is almost certain that I have an issue with my thyroid. He said I have a “Thyroid Bruit”, where he listened to my thyroid with a stethoscope and could here it going bananas. 

I have had bloods done and awaiting results within the next couple of days. 

Im not getting too hopeful, but if it comes back that I have hyperthyroidism (the doc said if he was a betting man, he’d put money on it), it could really explain a lot of what I have been going through symptom wise over the past many months. 

 

Cheers, 

Nick . 

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nick1990

Thyroid update.

 

Blood results are in, and I have a reading of 38 U/mL  for Thyroperoxidase Antibodies.  As far as I can tell, the presence of these antibodies indicates an autoimmune condition. 

 

I have a doc appointment in a couple of days, so will likely be referred to an endocrinologist.

 

@Altostrata, you have experience with thyroid issues do you not ? Its all very new to me and doctors freak me out a little. 

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Altostrata

Having elevated thyroid antibodies is not very meaningful. I've had elevated antibodies for 15 years.

 

Yes, have your thyroid checked out.

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nick1990

Thanks @Altostrata

 

Well it seems I may have nailed down a problem here. Thyroid seems relatively ok - I will be having some further tests. BUT , I have now got a clear platform to look over all my blood work, past and present. I have low Ferritin, low b12, low folate and suspected low Zinc. I have seem a naturopath/ nutritionist today, she was a bit taken aback by the levels, even though within the "normal" range, she says some people wouldn't be able to get out of bed with these levels.  We will be undergoing some more testing. 

Looking at my records, it seems I have been deficient in these things for years. Pity the doctors never mentioned it to me. 

 

Meanwhile, I have started a Methylcobalamin B12 supplement and an Iron supplement. 

 

Regarding my 1.5% drop I did a week ago, I haven't noticed any change in symptoms - if anything I've had moments of feeling a little better and less fatigued. Im just focusing on sorting out these deficiencies first, then ill get back to the tapering . 

 

Cheers, 

Nick. 

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nick1990

UPDATE 

 

Hey all, been a very interesting month. After seeing a naturopath and nutritionist, we have agreed that this is likely not a thyroid issue. However, we had a good look through my last few years of blood test results and it seems I have been very low in a few essential vitamins and minerals. B12 has been low for years, Ferretin too, and also Folate. 

 

I was started on a really good quality, practitioner only multi supplement, as well as Maltofer (Iron supplement) and honestly, my energy has come right back for the most part. I have been sleeping well, being able to do lots more things through the day, not needing to sleep at all through the day and just feeling better mentally/emotionally too. 

I have also had 3 weeks of B12 injections. They make me feel warm and fuzzy and relaxed afterward for about an hour. I have been advised to continue these, once a week for 6-8 weeks. 

Either way, I'm definitely noticing a lot of improvement. I am still having some waves, especially when overdoing things, but they're more identifiable and don't include the debilitating fatigue.

 

Also, headaches and migraines are lessening too, I have been doing some back strengthening exercises and they are helping a tonne. I even managed to surf yesterday for 4 hours and feel fine today, which has been unheard of for a fair while.

 

I have resumed tapering slowly and am not too far off 20mg now. I think I am starting to feel  better as a result of slow tapering. I'll continue with the supplements and B12 shots, as well as slow tapering - but all in all, things are finally starting to look up. 

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brassmonkey

Excellent update Nick- I'm so glad things are falling into place. Pay attention to the B12 though, don't want to over do a good thing. Watch your symptoms and if they start to increase after an injection that would indicate it's time to back off a bit.

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