Jump to content

uncomfortablynumb: withdrawal symptoms or anxiety / depression


uncomfortablynumb

Recommended Posts

  • Moderator Emeritus

When I hadn't been able to sleep for a whole week, I used a sleep hypnosis CD - it worked, but I woke up when it finished, so I would just play it again and again to get through the night.  The one I used was "Achieving Perfect Sleep" by Dr. Hilary Jones.  There are lots of these kinds of recordings available, on YouTube, etc.

2001–2002 paroxetine

2003  citalopram

2004-2008  paroxetine (various failed tapers) 
2008  paroxetine slow taper down to

2016  Aug off paroxetine
2016  citalopram May 20mg  Oct 15mg … slow taper down
2018  citalopram 13 Feb 4.6mg 15 Mar 4.4mg 29 Apr 4.2mg 6 Jul 4.1mg 17 Aug 4.0mg  18 Nov 3.8mg
2019  15 Mar 3.6mg  21 May 3.4mg  26 Dec 3.2mg 

2020  19 Feb 3.0mg 19 Jul 2.9mg 16 Sep 2.8mg 25 Oct 2.7mg 23 Oct 2.6mg 24 Dec 2.5mg

2021   29 Aug 2.4mg   15 Nov 2.3mg

Link to comment
  • Replies 281
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

  • uncomfortablynumb

    101

  • Mort81

    22

  • Altostrata

    19

  • Mirthazard

    17

Top Posters In This Topic

The sleep deprivation became too much.  I broke and took 3.75mg of Remeron.   Worked first night.  Then no sleep the second.  I don't know what to do now.  Feels like this is going to kill me.  

2006-15 Effexor on and off mostly on. Also tried drugs that didn't work; notriptyline, Celexa, Zoloft, Welbutrin, Abilify, Pristiq, Cymbalta. Weaned off Effexor for last time quickly (2015) - horrible depression, anxiety, and insomnia.
Remeron (2016) helped wd symptoms. 
2017 - tapered off Rem over a few mths. Horrible wd symptoms with insomnia. Reinstating Remeron fail. For wd insomnia tried: Trazodone, Elavil, Gabapentin, Seroquel, Doxepin, Valium. Failed. 2mg Ativan at bed intermittent use 4mth.
CT Ativan - off all meds June '17.  Recovered by Oct '17 - well for a yr.
Oct '18-now. Major stresses, drank alcohol. In hell -insomnia, dp/dr, head pressure, anhedonia, no emotions, blank mind.
May/June '19 - 16 doses Rem CT, 10 doses 2mg Ativan. CT

Recovered Oct 2020-June 2022 - fully functional, working.  Only left with head pressure.

Major stresses - mainly financial, living space, relationship - severe insomnia, severe anxiety, depression, dp/dr, emotional numbness, blank mind

Sept 2022 - for sleep - took 8 doses of 15mg Remeron, 3 doses of 7.5mg, 3 doses of 3.75mg, 3 doses of 1.875mg

Link to comment

This is the second time I reinstated Remeron in the past month.  First time I started with 7.5mg and slept 8hrs first night and not at all next 3. Upped to 15mg and slept first night and not the next three.  Stopped it and pretty much only slept once in two weeks.  Was desperate so took 3.75mg two nights ago. Same thing happened.  Slept 8hrs first night and none at all the second.  

 

Anyone know what is happening?  What do I do now?  Should I be stopping and hope I survive the severe sleep deprivation?  

2006-15 Effexor on and off mostly on. Also tried drugs that didn't work; notriptyline, Celexa, Zoloft, Welbutrin, Abilify, Pristiq, Cymbalta. Weaned off Effexor for last time quickly (2015) - horrible depression, anxiety, and insomnia.
Remeron (2016) helped wd symptoms. 
2017 - tapered off Rem over a few mths. Horrible wd symptoms with insomnia. Reinstating Remeron fail. For wd insomnia tried: Trazodone, Elavil, Gabapentin, Seroquel, Doxepin, Valium. Failed. 2mg Ativan at bed intermittent use 4mth.
CT Ativan - off all meds June '17.  Recovered by Oct '17 - well for a yr.
Oct '18-now. Major stresses, drank alcohol. In hell -insomnia, dp/dr, head pressure, anhedonia, no emotions, blank mind.
May/June '19 - 16 doses Rem CT, 10 doses 2mg Ativan. CT

Recovered Oct 2020-June 2022 - fully functional, working.  Only left with head pressure.

Major stresses - mainly financial, living space, relationship - severe insomnia, severe anxiety, depression, dp/dr, emotional numbness, blank mind

Sept 2022 - for sleep - took 8 doses of 15mg Remeron, 3 doses of 7.5mg, 3 doses of 3.75mg, 3 doses of 1.875mg

Link to comment

Perhaps a strange or unique case of ultra fast tolerance? On the other hand you slept 8 hour straight and after 24 hours your brain didnt respond the same way, but then your brain seemed to reach a baseline again, even if you didnt sleep for days, but it worked again. A tought quest you have to discover how your brain is playing with you.

May - october 2017 - Mirtazapine from 7.5 - 12mg mg for insomnia

May - october 2017 Lyrica 100mg a day.

October-november 2017 - both mirt and Lyrica, or one of them went paradoxical, exteme vertigo after Lyrica. Cut down Lyrica to 3x25mg a day, same vertigo, CT Lyrica. Insomnia developed severe on 12 MG mirtazapine, reduced to 7.5, still insomnia, reduced to 3.75 still.insomnia. CT mirt. 

November 2017 - present burning feet, pins and needles, muscle spasms, myoclonus limbs, head, bugs crawling my head burning hands, left side worst. Ears cracking sensation.

May 2019 - put on gabapentin 100mg 4xday to counteract insomnia

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

Have you tried relaxation exercises or sleep hypnosis recordings?

2001–2002 paroxetine

2003  citalopram

2004-2008  paroxetine (various failed tapers) 
2008  paroxetine slow taper down to

2016  Aug off paroxetine
2016  citalopram May 20mg  Oct 15mg … slow taper down
2018  citalopram 13 Feb 4.6mg 15 Mar 4.4mg 29 Apr 4.2mg 6 Jul 4.1mg 17 Aug 4.0mg  18 Nov 3.8mg
2019  15 Mar 3.6mg  21 May 3.4mg  26 Dec 3.2mg 

2020  19 Feb 3.0mg 19 Jul 2.9mg 16 Sep 2.8mg 25 Oct 2.7mg 23 Oct 2.6mg 24 Dec 2.5mg

2021   29 Aug 2.4mg   15 Nov 2.3mg

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus
12 hours ago, uncomfortablynumb said:

The sleep deprivation became too much.  I broke and took 3.75mg of Remeron.   Worked first night.  Then no sleep the second.  I don't know what to do now.  Feels like this is going to kill me.  

 

Are you still doing the Remeron or did you just do it those first and second nights?

*I'm not a doctor and don't give medical advice, just personal experience
**Off all meds since Nov. 2014. Mentally & emotionally recovered; physically not
-Dual cold turkeys off TCA & Ativan in Oct 2014. Prescribed from 2011-2014

-All meds were Rxed off-label for an autoimmune illness.  It was a MISDIAGNOSIS, but I did not find out until AFTER meds caused damage.  All med tapers/cold turkeys directed by doctors 

-Nortriptyline May 2012 - Dec 2013. Cold turkey off nortrip & cold switched to desipramine

-Desipramine Jan 2014 - Oct. 29, 2014 (rapid taper/cold turkey)

-Lorazepam 1 mg per night during 2011
-Lorazepam 1 mg per month in 2012 (or less)

-Lorazepam on & off, Dec 2013 through Aug 2014. Didn't exceed 3x a week

-Lorazepam again in Oct. 2014 to help get off of desipramine. Last dose lzpam was 1 mg, Nov. 2, 2014. Immediate paradoxical reactions to benzos after stopping TCAs 

-First muscle/dystonia side effects started on nortriptyline, but docs too stupid to figure it out. On desipramine, muscle tremors & rigidity worsened

-Two weeks after I got off all meds, I developed full-blown TD.  Tardive dystonia, dyskinesia, myoclonic jerks ALL over body, ribcage wiggles, facial tics, twitching tongue & fingers, tremors/twitches of arms, legs, cognitive impairment, throat muscles semi-paralyzed & unable to swallow solid food, brain zaps, ears ring, dizzy, everything looks too far away, insomnia, numbness & electric shocks everywhere when I try to fall asleep, jerk awake from sleep with big, gasping breaths, wake with terrors & tremors, severely depressed.  NO HISTORY OF DEPRESSION, EVER. Meds CREATED it.

-Month 7: hair falling out; no vision improvement; still tardive dystonia; facial & tongue tics returned
-Month 8: back to acute, incl. Grand Mal seizure-like episodes. New mental torment, PGAD, worse insomnia
-Month 9: tardive dystonia worse, dyskinesia returned. Unable to breathe well due to dystonia in stomach, chest, throat
-Month 13: Back to acute, brain zaps back, developed eczema & stomach problems. Left leg no longer works right due to dystonia, meaning both legs now damaged
-7 years off: Huge improvements, incl. improved dystonia

Link to comment

I took it for the third night.  May have gotten 30m to an hour sleep.  Do I stick with it or quit?

2006-15 Effexor on and off mostly on. Also tried drugs that didn't work; notriptyline, Celexa, Zoloft, Welbutrin, Abilify, Pristiq, Cymbalta. Weaned off Effexor for last time quickly (2015) - horrible depression, anxiety, and insomnia.
Remeron (2016) helped wd symptoms. 
2017 - tapered off Rem over a few mths. Horrible wd symptoms with insomnia. Reinstating Remeron fail. For wd insomnia tried: Trazodone, Elavil, Gabapentin, Seroquel, Doxepin, Valium. Failed. 2mg Ativan at bed intermittent use 4mth.
CT Ativan - off all meds June '17.  Recovered by Oct '17 - well for a yr.
Oct '18-now. Major stresses, drank alcohol. In hell -insomnia, dp/dr, head pressure, anhedonia, no emotions, blank mind.
May/June '19 - 16 doses Rem CT, 10 doses 2mg Ativan. CT

Recovered Oct 2020-June 2022 - fully functional, working.  Only left with head pressure.

Major stresses - mainly financial, living space, relationship - severe insomnia, severe anxiety, depression, dp/dr, emotional numbness, blank mind

Sept 2022 - for sleep - took 8 doses of 15mg Remeron, 3 doses of 7.5mg, 3 doses of 3.75mg, 3 doses of 1.875mg

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus
9 hours ago, uncomfortablynumb said:

I took it for the third night.  May have gotten 30m to an hour sleep.  Do I stick with it or quit?

 

It doesn't sound like it's helping much.  

2001–2002 paroxetine

2003  citalopram

2004-2008  paroxetine (various failed tapers) 
2008  paroxetine slow taper down to

2016  Aug off paroxetine
2016  citalopram May 20mg  Oct 15mg … slow taper down
2018  citalopram 13 Feb 4.6mg 15 Mar 4.4mg 29 Apr 4.2mg 6 Jul 4.1mg 17 Aug 4.0mg  18 Nov 3.8mg
2019  15 Mar 3.6mg  21 May 3.4mg  26 Dec 3.2mg 

2020  19 Feb 3.0mg 19 Jul 2.9mg 16 Sep 2.8mg 25 Oct 2.7mg 23 Oct 2.6mg 24 Dec 2.5mg

2021   29 Aug 2.4mg   15 Nov 2.3mg

Link to comment
  • Administrator

UN, what was your sleep pattern? When did you take 3.75mg mirtazapine, when did you sleep, and when did you wake up? What happened to make you wake up?

 

It sounds to me like a paradoxical reaction. You might try 3mg mirtazapine, you need to find a low enough dose to sneak under your hypervigilant nervous system.

 

Also, did you try Music for self-care: Calms hyperalertness, anxiety, aids relaxation and sleep  or even leave the TV on at a very low volume? (The latter is risky because of explosions and loud commercials.)

 

PS Post questions about your particular situation here in your Intro topic, we need to see the context.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

Link to comment

Hi Alto,

I am guessing the same with the paradoxical reaction.  It didn't even work at 3mg.  I then did something potentially stupid but further proves that drugs are going paradoxical on me.  I took Ativan for the first time in 2yrs.  It did nothing.  So it seems like I am at a dead end.  I am at God's mercy and the insomnia will either kill me or damage my brain or I will somehow survive. 

 

I go to sleep between 10 and 12. Was taking the mirt 30m before bed.  First time it worked and I was asleep within an hour.  Next time no sleep.  Third time up to 1hr between 6 and 7.  I stay in bed til 11am to rest because I am not working right now.

 

I could never sleep with any lights or noise when healthy or in withdrawal.

 

This is all a nightmare with no emotions, blank mind, dp/dr, memory problems, and head pain.  7 months of this and hope fades.  

2006-15 Effexor on and off mostly on. Also tried drugs that didn't work; notriptyline, Celexa, Zoloft, Welbutrin, Abilify, Pristiq, Cymbalta. Weaned off Effexor for last time quickly (2015) - horrible depression, anxiety, and insomnia.
Remeron (2016) helped wd symptoms. 
2017 - tapered off Rem over a few mths. Horrible wd symptoms with insomnia. Reinstating Remeron fail. For wd insomnia tried: Trazodone, Elavil, Gabapentin, Seroquel, Doxepin, Valium. Failed. 2mg Ativan at bed intermittent use 4mth.
CT Ativan - off all meds June '17.  Recovered by Oct '17 - well for a yr.
Oct '18-now. Major stresses, drank alcohol. In hell -insomnia, dp/dr, head pressure, anhedonia, no emotions, blank mind.
May/June '19 - 16 doses Rem CT, 10 doses 2mg Ativan. CT

Recovered Oct 2020-June 2022 - fully functional, working.  Only left with head pressure.

Major stresses - mainly financial, living space, relationship - severe insomnia, severe anxiety, depression, dp/dr, emotional numbness, blank mind

Sept 2022 - for sleep - took 8 doses of 15mg Remeron, 3 doses of 7.5mg, 3 doses of 3.75mg, 3 doses of 1.875mg

Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus
32 minutes ago, uncomfortablynumb said:

the insomnia

 

I'm sorry you're having such a hard time.  I imagine you've tried just about everything but just in case--I've had some success sleeping with a low dose of Melatonin before bed taken with a low dose of magnesium glycinate.  You might start with .25mg Melatonin and work up if necessary to maybe 1mg (higher doses can go paradoxical).  When I wake up a few hours later I take more magnesium.

Gridley Introduction

 

Lexapro 20 mg since 2004.  Begin Brassmonkey Slide Taper Jan. 2017.   

End 2017 year 1 of taper at 9.25mg 

End 2018 year 2 of taper at 4.1mg

End 2019 year 3 of taper at 1.0mg  

Oct. 30, 2020  Jump to zero from 0.025mg.  Current dose: 0.000mg

3 year, 10 month taper is 100% complete.

 

Ativan 1 mg to 1.875mg 1986-2020, two CT's and reinstatements

Nov. 2020, 7-week Ativan-Valium crossover to 18.75mg Valium

Feb. 2021, begin 10%/4 week taper of 18.75mg Valium 

End 2021  year 1 of Valium taper at 6mg

End 2022 year 2 of Valium taper at 2.75mg 

End 2023 year 3 of Valium taper at 1mg

Jan. 24, 2024: Hold at 1mg and shift to Imipramine taper.

Taper is 95% complete.

 

Imipramine 75 mg daily since 1986.  Jan.-Sept. 2016 tapered to 14.4mg  

March 22, 2022: Begin 10%/4 week taper

Aug. 5, 2022: hold at 9.5mg and shift to Valium taper

Jan. 24, 2024: Resume Imipramine taper.  Current dose as of April 1: 6.8mg

Taper is 91% complete.  

  

Supplements: multiple, quercetin, omega-3, vitamins C, E and D3, magnesium glycinate, probiotics, zinc, melatonin .3mg, iron, serrapeptase, nattokinase


I am not a medical professional and this is not medical advice but simply information based on my own experience, as well as other members who have survived these drugs.

Link to comment
  • Administrator

Gridley's suggestion is a good one. Also. get off the computer by 6 p.m.

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

Link to comment

Thanks.  I am gonna hang on as tight as I can and try any advice.  I will turn off electronics early.  I sometimes use the blue blocking glasses without much help.  

@Alto, you see my symptoms list is pretty brutal. Do you know of anyone who has experienced all of these and recovered?  Particularly the emotions and blank mind and super-severe insomnia?  

2006-15 Effexor on and off mostly on. Also tried drugs that didn't work; notriptyline, Celexa, Zoloft, Welbutrin, Abilify, Pristiq, Cymbalta. Weaned off Effexor for last time quickly (2015) - horrible depression, anxiety, and insomnia.
Remeron (2016) helped wd symptoms. 
2017 - tapered off Rem over a few mths. Horrible wd symptoms with insomnia. Reinstating Remeron fail. For wd insomnia tried: Trazodone, Elavil, Gabapentin, Seroquel, Doxepin, Valium. Failed. 2mg Ativan at bed intermittent use 4mth.
CT Ativan - off all meds June '17.  Recovered by Oct '17 - well for a yr.
Oct '18-now. Major stresses, drank alcohol. In hell -insomnia, dp/dr, head pressure, anhedonia, no emotions, blank mind.
May/June '19 - 16 doses Rem CT, 10 doses 2mg Ativan. CT

Recovered Oct 2020-June 2022 - fully functional, working.  Only left with head pressure.

Major stresses - mainly financial, living space, relationship - severe insomnia, severe anxiety, depression, dp/dr, emotional numbness, blank mind

Sept 2022 - for sleep - took 8 doses of 15mg Remeron, 3 doses of 7.5mg, 3 doses of 3.75mg, 3 doses of 1.875mg

Link to comment
  • Administrator

It appears you kindled your nervous system with alcohol or some other drug.

 

How much Ativan did you take? Do you have only a few tablets? What is your doctor's policy on refilling the prescription?

This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner.

"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein

All postings © copyrighted.

Link to comment

Hi Alto, 

I took 2mg of Ativan.  It was the last dose that worked when I took it almost 2yrs ago.  I was prescribed 20 1mg tablets.  I don't know my doctor's policy on refilling.  

 

Do you know of recovery cases of what I am going through?  

2006-15 Effexor on and off mostly on. Also tried drugs that didn't work; notriptyline, Celexa, Zoloft, Welbutrin, Abilify, Pristiq, Cymbalta. Weaned off Effexor for last time quickly (2015) - horrible depression, anxiety, and insomnia.
Remeron (2016) helped wd symptoms. 
2017 - tapered off Rem over a few mths. Horrible wd symptoms with insomnia. Reinstating Remeron fail. For wd insomnia tried: Trazodone, Elavil, Gabapentin, Seroquel, Doxepin, Valium. Failed. 2mg Ativan at bed intermittent use 4mth.
CT Ativan - off all meds June '17.  Recovered by Oct '17 - well for a yr.
Oct '18-now. Major stresses, drank alcohol. In hell -insomnia, dp/dr, head pressure, anhedonia, no emotions, blank mind.
May/June '19 - 16 doses Rem CT, 10 doses 2mg Ativan. CT

Recovered Oct 2020-June 2022 - fully functional, working.  Only left with head pressure.

Major stresses - mainly financial, living space, relationship - severe insomnia, severe anxiety, depression, dp/dr, emotional numbness, blank mind

Sept 2022 - for sleep - took 8 doses of 15mg Remeron, 3 doses of 7.5mg, 3 doses of 3.75mg, 3 doses of 1.875mg

Link to comment
  • Mentor

Hi Uncomfortably Numb,

 

I am sorry to hear you’re suffering so badly.

 

I don’t know if you have heard of CBTI, which is cognitive behavioural therapy for insomnia? It might be something you could consider. It is backed up by evidence, if you want to see the evidence you could read this:-

 

https://www.med.upenn.edu/cbti/assets/user-content/documents/Morin et al. 2017 Meta-Analysis.pdf

 

I hope that, whatever you try, you recover soon. 

 

R

 = medication taken now

2007 quetiapine to March 2019 200mg

2019 quetiapine March to present 225mg 

2007 citalopram to present 40mg 
2018 March Abilify 5mg  
2019 Abilify February rapid taper over 3 weeks from 5mg to off

2019 March Clonazepam as required, taken very occasionally, then taken 0.5mg for 2 days 28th and 29th March, now phased out

2019 1st April reinstated Abilify 0.5mg / day 

2018 to 2020 Liquid B12 2g twice daily (diagnosed B12 deficiency) 

2020 July reduced quetiapine to 200mg

2022 October began taper of Abilify
 

Link to comment

Thanks for trying to help.  I tried CBT last time I dealt with this without success.  I am so anxious and worn down.  I don't know how to keep going on completely sleepless nights.  

2006-15 Effexor on and off mostly on. Also tried drugs that didn't work; notriptyline, Celexa, Zoloft, Welbutrin, Abilify, Pristiq, Cymbalta. Weaned off Effexor for last time quickly (2015) - horrible depression, anxiety, and insomnia.
Remeron (2016) helped wd symptoms. 
2017 - tapered off Rem over a few mths. Horrible wd symptoms with insomnia. Reinstating Remeron fail. For wd insomnia tried: Trazodone, Elavil, Gabapentin, Seroquel, Doxepin, Valium. Failed. 2mg Ativan at bed intermittent use 4mth.
CT Ativan - off all meds June '17.  Recovered by Oct '17 - well for a yr.
Oct '18-now. Major stresses, drank alcohol. In hell -insomnia, dp/dr, head pressure, anhedonia, no emotions, blank mind.
May/June '19 - 16 doses Rem CT, 10 doses 2mg Ativan. CT

Recovered Oct 2020-June 2022 - fully functional, working.  Only left with head pressure.

Major stresses - mainly financial, living space, relationship - severe insomnia, severe anxiety, depression, dp/dr, emotional numbness, blank mind

Sept 2022 - for sleep - took 8 doses of 15mg Remeron, 3 doses of 7.5mg, 3 doses of 3.75mg, 3 doses of 1.875mg

Link to comment

How long can complete sleep deprivation last?  

2006-15 Effexor on and off mostly on. Also tried drugs that didn't work; notriptyline, Celexa, Zoloft, Welbutrin, Abilify, Pristiq, Cymbalta. Weaned off Effexor for last time quickly (2015) - horrible depression, anxiety, and insomnia.
Remeron (2016) helped wd symptoms. 
2017 - tapered off Rem over a few mths. Horrible wd symptoms with insomnia. Reinstating Remeron fail. For wd insomnia tried: Trazodone, Elavil, Gabapentin, Seroquel, Doxepin, Valium. Failed. 2mg Ativan at bed intermittent use 4mth.
CT Ativan - off all meds June '17.  Recovered by Oct '17 - well for a yr.
Oct '18-now. Major stresses, drank alcohol. In hell -insomnia, dp/dr, head pressure, anhedonia, no emotions, blank mind.
May/June '19 - 16 doses Rem CT, 10 doses 2mg Ativan. CT

Recovered Oct 2020-June 2022 - fully functional, working.  Only left with head pressure.

Major stresses - mainly financial, living space, relationship - severe insomnia, severe anxiety, depression, dp/dr, emotional numbness, blank mind

Sept 2022 - for sleep - took 8 doses of 15mg Remeron, 3 doses of 7.5mg, 3 doses of 3.75mg, 3 doses of 1.875mg

Link to comment

For how long are you deprived since last dose?

May - october 2017 - Mirtazapine from 7.5 - 12mg mg for insomnia

May - october 2017 Lyrica 100mg a day.

October-november 2017 - both mirt and Lyrica, or one of them went paradoxical, exteme vertigo after Lyrica. Cut down Lyrica to 3x25mg a day, same vertigo, CT Lyrica. Insomnia developed severe on 12 MG mirtazapine, reduced to 7.5, still insomnia, reduced to 3.75 still.insomnia. CT mirt. 

November 2017 - present burning feet, pins and needles, muscle spasms, myoclonus limbs, head, bugs crawling my head burning hands, left side worst. Ears cracking sensation.

May 2019 - put on gabapentin 100mg 4xday to counteract insomnia

Link to comment

It has been like 10 days straight with no perceived sleep.  It is no way to live. 

2006-15 Effexor on and off mostly on. Also tried drugs that didn't work; notriptyline, Celexa, Zoloft, Welbutrin, Abilify, Pristiq, Cymbalta. Weaned off Effexor for last time quickly (2015) - horrible depression, anxiety, and insomnia.
Remeron (2016) helped wd symptoms. 
2017 - tapered off Rem over a few mths. Horrible wd symptoms with insomnia. Reinstating Remeron fail. For wd insomnia tried: Trazodone, Elavil, Gabapentin, Seroquel, Doxepin, Valium. Failed. 2mg Ativan at bed intermittent use 4mth.
CT Ativan - off all meds June '17.  Recovered by Oct '17 - well for a yr.
Oct '18-now. Major stresses, drank alcohol. In hell -insomnia, dp/dr, head pressure, anhedonia, no emotions, blank mind.
May/June '19 - 16 doses Rem CT, 10 doses 2mg Ativan. CT

Recovered Oct 2020-June 2022 - fully functional, working.  Only left with head pressure.

Major stresses - mainly financial, living space, relationship - severe insomnia, severe anxiety, depression, dp/dr, emotional numbness, blank mind

Sept 2022 - for sleep - took 8 doses of 15mg Remeron, 3 doses of 7.5mg, 3 doses of 3.75mg, 3 doses of 1.875mg

Link to comment

When you had this problem a year ago, for how long were you in this ups and crashes before suddenly being ok with sleep again? A month? Two month? Three? More?

May - october 2017 - Mirtazapine from 7.5 - 12mg mg for insomnia

May - october 2017 Lyrica 100mg a day.

October-november 2017 - both mirt and Lyrica, or one of them went paradoxical, exteme vertigo after Lyrica. Cut down Lyrica to 3x25mg a day, same vertigo, CT Lyrica. Insomnia developed severe on 12 MG mirtazapine, reduced to 7.5, still insomnia, reduced to 3.75 still.insomnia. CT mirt. 

November 2017 - present burning feet, pins and needles, muscle spasms, myoclonus limbs, head, bugs crawling my head burning hands, left side worst. Ears cracking sensation.

May 2019 - put on gabapentin 100mg 4xday to counteract insomnia

Link to comment

It was around 4 months of Hell once off meds.  First month I only had 2 nights of no more than two hour sleep.   

This time around sleep has been very rare in past 4 months.  I mucked around with trying the mirtazapine several times over past while.   

I am already completely drained and can't function.  I don't know what to do. 

2006-15 Effexor on and off mostly on. Also tried drugs that didn't work; notriptyline, Celexa, Zoloft, Welbutrin, Abilify, Pristiq, Cymbalta. Weaned off Effexor for last time quickly (2015) - horrible depression, anxiety, and insomnia.
Remeron (2016) helped wd symptoms. 
2017 - tapered off Rem over a few mths. Horrible wd symptoms with insomnia. Reinstating Remeron fail. For wd insomnia tried: Trazodone, Elavil, Gabapentin, Seroquel, Doxepin, Valium. Failed. 2mg Ativan at bed intermittent use 4mth.
CT Ativan - off all meds June '17.  Recovered by Oct '17 - well for a yr.
Oct '18-now. Major stresses, drank alcohol. In hell -insomnia, dp/dr, head pressure, anhedonia, no emotions, blank mind.
May/June '19 - 16 doses Rem CT, 10 doses 2mg Ativan. CT

Recovered Oct 2020-June 2022 - fully functional, working.  Only left with head pressure.

Major stresses - mainly financial, living space, relationship - severe insomnia, severe anxiety, depression, dp/dr, emotional numbness, blank mind

Sept 2022 - for sleep - took 8 doses of 15mg Remeron, 3 doses of 7.5mg, 3 doses of 3.75mg, 3 doses of 1.875mg

Link to comment
  • Mentor

Hi Uncomfortably Numb,

 

what you’re going through sounds almost unbearable. I hope you get some relief soon.

 

I noticed that your symptoms ramped up in October last year. Is it possible that one of the triggers was the coming of winter? I don’t you know if you are sensitive to the weather, but a lot of people are, including me.

 

R

 = medication taken now

2007 quetiapine to March 2019 200mg

2019 quetiapine March to present 225mg 

2007 citalopram to present 40mg 
2018 March Abilify 5mg  
2019 Abilify February rapid taper over 3 weeks from 5mg to off

2019 March Clonazepam as required, taken very occasionally, then taken 0.5mg for 2 days 28th and 29th March, now phased out

2019 1st April reinstated Abilify 0.5mg / day 

2018 to 2020 Liquid B12 2g twice daily (diagnosed B12 deficiency) 

2020 July reduced quetiapine to 200mg

2022 October began taper of Abilify
 

Link to comment

And now did you reach or are post the 4 months mark? Trying to find a pattern here

May - october 2017 - Mirtazapine from 7.5 - 12mg mg for insomnia

May - october 2017 Lyrica 100mg a day.

October-november 2017 - both mirt and Lyrica, or one of them went paradoxical, exteme vertigo after Lyrica. Cut down Lyrica to 3x25mg a day, same vertigo, CT Lyrica. Insomnia developed severe on 12 MG mirtazapine, reduced to 7.5, still insomnia, reduced to 3.75 still.insomnia. CT mirt. 

November 2017 - present burning feet, pins and needles, muscle spasms, myoclonus limbs, head, bugs crawling my head burning hands, left side worst. Ears cracking sensation.

May 2019 - put on gabapentin 100mg 4xday to counteract insomnia

Link to comment

It has been over 4 months now.  But I desperately tried meds over this time.  

2006-15 Effexor on and off mostly on. Also tried drugs that didn't work; notriptyline, Celexa, Zoloft, Welbutrin, Abilify, Pristiq, Cymbalta. Weaned off Effexor for last time quickly (2015) - horrible depression, anxiety, and insomnia.
Remeron (2016) helped wd symptoms. 
2017 - tapered off Rem over a few mths. Horrible wd symptoms with insomnia. Reinstating Remeron fail. For wd insomnia tried: Trazodone, Elavil, Gabapentin, Seroquel, Doxepin, Valium. Failed. 2mg Ativan at bed intermittent use 4mth.
CT Ativan - off all meds June '17.  Recovered by Oct '17 - well for a yr.
Oct '18-now. Major stresses, drank alcohol. In hell -insomnia, dp/dr, head pressure, anhedonia, no emotions, blank mind.
May/June '19 - 16 doses Rem CT, 10 doses 2mg Ativan. CT

Recovered Oct 2020-June 2022 - fully functional, working.  Only left with head pressure.

Major stresses - mainly financial, living space, relationship - severe insomnia, severe anxiety, depression, dp/dr, emotional numbness, blank mind

Sept 2022 - for sleep - took 8 doses of 15mg Remeron, 3 doses of 7.5mg, 3 doses of 3.75mg, 3 doses of 1.875mg

Link to comment

It might be a good idea checking with a neurologist specializing in sleep. You seem to have tried many things without success. You can be frontal and open with him and say you recovered sleep without drugs and suddenly you developed this sleep deprivation again, and mention what you may think that trigger it. Be honest to him, them about drugs and ask what can you do to check what is going on with your brain. They might give you help or not, but at least you are trying, you have nothing to loose, the decision on what to do is always yours, but since your are waiting that sleep comes and drugs are not working, why not give doctor neurologist a try again? Psychiatrists on the other hand wont help you, unless you want drugs. And remember whatever he advises or says it is always you who decides what to do ok? Research and keep trying man.

 

I found this in you area do you know it?

 

https://sunnybrook.ca/content/?page=bsp-sleep-home

 

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.ratemds.com/amp/best-doctors/%3fprovince=on&specialty=sleep-disorders

 

https://css-scs.ca/

 

http://www.sleepontario.com/doctor_ong.php

 

 

May - october 2017 - Mirtazapine from 7.5 - 12mg mg for insomnia

May - october 2017 Lyrica 100mg a day.

October-november 2017 - both mirt and Lyrica, or one of them went paradoxical, exteme vertigo after Lyrica. Cut down Lyrica to 3x25mg a day, same vertigo, CT Lyrica. Insomnia developed severe on 12 MG mirtazapine, reduced to 7.5, still insomnia, reduced to 3.75 still.insomnia. CT mirt. 

November 2017 - present burning feet, pins and needles, muscle spasms, myoclonus limbs, head, bugs crawling my head burning hands, left side worst. Ears cracking sensation.

May 2019 - put on gabapentin 100mg 4xday to counteract insomnia

Link to comment
On 5/5/2019 at 8:19 PM, uncomfortablynumb said:

Hi Alto,

I am guessing the same with the paradoxical reaction.  It didn't even work at 3mg.  I then did something potentially stupid but further proves that drugs are going paradoxical on me.  I took Ativan for the first time in 2yrs.  It did nothing.  So it seems like I am at a dead end.  I am at God's mercy and the insomnia will either kill me or damage my brain or I will somehow survive. 

 

I go to sleep between 10 and 12. Was taking the mirt 30m before bed.  First time it worked and I was asleep within an hour.  Next time no sleep.  Third time up to 1hr between 6 and 7.  I stay in bed til 11am to rest because I am not working right now.

 

I could never sleep with any lights or noise when healthy or in withdrawal.

 

This is all a nightmare with no emotions, blank mind, dp/dr, memory problems, and head pain.  7 months of this and hope fades.  

Passiflora helped me at certain points . Everyone is different, I know. 

1999:  Paroxetine (20mg). Age 16. 2007-2008: Fluoxetine (Prozac) for 1.5 years (age 25) Citalopram 20mg 2002-2005, 2009: Escitalopram (20mg), 2 weeks, (age 26) (adverse  reaction)/*Valium 5mg/Temazepam 10mg 2010: Mirtazipine (Remeron)( do not remember dosage) 2010, 5 months.                     2010-2017: Citalopram (20mg) (age 27 to 34) 2016: i.1st Sept- 31st Oct Citalopram 10mg , ii.1st November 2017-30th November 2017, Citalopram 5mg iii.1st December 2017- 4th February 2018, Citalopram 0mg, iv.5th February 2018- March 2018 Citalopram 5mg (10mg every other day) 28th February- tried titration of 5mg ( some adverse effects)

2018: 1st March 2018- 1st June Citalopram 10 mg (tablet form) /started titration 8mg , then 7 mg.2018: June 15th- 10th July Citalopram 10 mg pill every other day 2018: 10th July - 13th Sept Citalopram- 0mg  (CBD oil first month of 0mg, passiflora on and off) 2018 13th Sept Citalopram  2mg ,  approx 16th Sept 4mg , approx 25th Sept 6mg held.  2019: 11 Feb 19: 7mg (instant bad rxn) 12 Feb 19 6mg held 1 May 19 5.4mg held 5 Oct 19 5.36mg 22 Oct 19 5.29mg 30 Oct 19 5.23mg 4/NOV/19 5.18mg 12 Nov 19 5.08mg 20 Nov 19 4.77mg 7 May 22 2.31mg 17/09/2023 0.8mg

(Herbal/Supplements since 1st September: Omega Fish Oil 1200mg, 663mg of EPA- 2 tablets a day, magnesium and magnesium bath salts)

I did not die, and yet I lost life’s breath
- Dante
Link to comment
  • Moderator Emeritus

2001–2002 paroxetine

2003  citalopram

2004-2008  paroxetine (various failed tapers) 
2008  paroxetine slow taper down to

2016  Aug off paroxetine
2016  citalopram May 20mg  Oct 15mg … slow taper down
2018  citalopram 13 Feb 4.6mg 15 Mar 4.4mg 29 Apr 4.2mg 6 Jul 4.1mg 17 Aug 4.0mg  18 Nov 3.8mg
2019  15 Mar 3.6mg  21 May 3.4mg  26 Dec 3.2mg 

2020  19 Feb 3.0mg 19 Jul 2.9mg 16 Sep 2.8mg 25 Oct 2.7mg 23 Oct 2.6mg 24 Dec 2.5mg

2021   29 Aug 2.4mg   15 Nov 2.3mg

Link to comment

Mirthazard - thanks for those sleep clinic links.  I had a study done at another clinic last time I was going through Hell.  Had over 30 arousals every hour so basically not getting anything past microsleep or stage 1.  Getting a referral for a sleep study at that hospital would take months and months.  

This deprivation is driving me to my limits and my head pressure is insane. When I say zero sleep I mean it. How can one even survive this?   

 

India - haven't tried passionflower.  Does it work on extreme insomnia?  

 

Songbird - thank you for sharing your tips. I have tried guided meditation and progressive muscle relaxation.  I am sure it can help people but it never worked for me.  :( Really scared.  

2006-15 Effexor on and off mostly on. Also tried drugs that didn't work; notriptyline, Celexa, Zoloft, Welbutrin, Abilify, Pristiq, Cymbalta. Weaned off Effexor for last time quickly (2015) - horrible depression, anxiety, and insomnia.
Remeron (2016) helped wd symptoms. 
2017 - tapered off Rem over a few mths. Horrible wd symptoms with insomnia. Reinstating Remeron fail. For wd insomnia tried: Trazodone, Elavil, Gabapentin, Seroquel, Doxepin, Valium. Failed. 2mg Ativan at bed intermittent use 4mth.
CT Ativan - off all meds June '17.  Recovered by Oct '17 - well for a yr.
Oct '18-now. Major stresses, drank alcohol. In hell -insomnia, dp/dr, head pressure, anhedonia, no emotions, blank mind.
May/June '19 - 16 doses Rem CT, 10 doses 2mg Ativan. CT

Recovered Oct 2020-June 2022 - fully functional, working.  Only left with head pressure.

Major stresses - mainly financial, living space, relationship - severe insomnia, severe anxiety, depression, dp/dr, emotional numbness, blank mind

Sept 2022 - for sleep - took 8 doses of 15mg Remeron, 3 doses of 7.5mg, 3 doses of 3.75mg, 3 doses of 1.875mg

Link to comment

I did not meant only a sleep study, but simply get professional opinion of what could be going on. There are other problems they can find. MRI? Just a thought.

 

 

May - october 2017 - Mirtazapine from 7.5 - 12mg mg for insomnia

May - october 2017 Lyrica 100mg a day.

October-november 2017 - both mirt and Lyrica, or one of them went paradoxical, exteme vertigo after Lyrica. Cut down Lyrica to 3x25mg a day, same vertigo, CT Lyrica. Insomnia developed severe on 12 MG mirtazapine, reduced to 7.5, still insomnia, reduced to 3.75 still.insomnia. CT mirt. 

November 2017 - present burning feet, pins and needles, muscle spasms, myoclonus limbs, head, bugs crawling my head burning hands, left side worst. Ears cracking sensation.

May 2019 - put on gabapentin 100mg 4xday to counteract insomnia

Link to comment

Would love to know what is going on.  CT scan didn't reveal anything.  Wonder if MRI or EEG would explain why I cannot fall asleep at all and why I lost my emotions and have a blank mind.  Doc thinks depression and anxiety is causing all this stuff.  These symptoms I have experienced after meds so I don't know.  Hard to believe depression or anxiety could cause extreme sleep deprivation.  

2006-15 Effexor on and off mostly on. Also tried drugs that didn't work; notriptyline, Celexa, Zoloft, Welbutrin, Abilify, Pristiq, Cymbalta. Weaned off Effexor for last time quickly (2015) - horrible depression, anxiety, and insomnia.
Remeron (2016) helped wd symptoms. 
2017 - tapered off Rem over a few mths. Horrible wd symptoms with insomnia. Reinstating Remeron fail. For wd insomnia tried: Trazodone, Elavil, Gabapentin, Seroquel, Doxepin, Valium. Failed. 2mg Ativan at bed intermittent use 4mth.
CT Ativan - off all meds June '17.  Recovered by Oct '17 - well for a yr.
Oct '18-now. Major stresses, drank alcohol. In hell -insomnia, dp/dr, head pressure, anhedonia, no emotions, blank mind.
May/June '19 - 16 doses Rem CT, 10 doses 2mg Ativan. CT

Recovered Oct 2020-June 2022 - fully functional, working.  Only left with head pressure.

Major stresses - mainly financial, living space, relationship - severe insomnia, severe anxiety, depression, dp/dr, emotional numbness, blank mind

Sept 2022 - for sleep - took 8 doses of 15mg Remeron, 3 doses of 7.5mg, 3 doses of 3.75mg, 3 doses of 1.875mg

Link to comment

If you tried meds for anxiety, how could it be anxiety? I would ask, Right? Did you ask him that?

 

Could it be that you are having sleep and not being aware of it? I saw a post on benzobuddies about that, that it might be possible you are sleeping without perceving it?  Did you look at the watch to sometimes check if suddenly it seems there was a large difference in the ammount  of time that passed between closing and opening the eyes?

 

 

 

 

May - october 2017 - Mirtazapine from 7.5 - 12mg mg for insomnia

May - october 2017 Lyrica 100mg a day.

October-november 2017 - both mirt and Lyrica, or one of them went paradoxical, exteme vertigo after Lyrica. Cut down Lyrica to 3x25mg a day, same vertigo, CT Lyrica. Insomnia developed severe on 12 MG mirtazapine, reduced to 7.5, still insomnia, reduced to 3.75 still.insomnia. CT mirt. 

November 2017 - present burning feet, pins and needles, muscle spasms, myoclonus limbs, head, bugs crawling my head burning hands, left side worst. Ears cracking sensation.

May 2019 - put on gabapentin 100mg 4xday to counteract insomnia

Link to comment

Yeah,  even though I am anxious and depressed I am not sure if that is causing the insomnia, DP/DR, blank mind, no emotions etc.  Hard to prove what is happening.  I really want to know if people recover from these symptoms.  If not, quality of life is almost 0.  Add no sleep to that and it is truly Hell. 

I figure I must be getting microsleep or I would be dead by now.  

2006-15 Effexor on and off mostly on. Also tried drugs that didn't work; notriptyline, Celexa, Zoloft, Welbutrin, Abilify, Pristiq, Cymbalta. Weaned off Effexor for last time quickly (2015) - horrible depression, anxiety, and insomnia.
Remeron (2016) helped wd symptoms. 
2017 - tapered off Rem over a few mths. Horrible wd symptoms with insomnia. Reinstating Remeron fail. For wd insomnia tried: Trazodone, Elavil, Gabapentin, Seroquel, Doxepin, Valium. Failed. 2mg Ativan at bed intermittent use 4mth.
CT Ativan - off all meds June '17.  Recovered by Oct '17 - well for a yr.
Oct '18-now. Major stresses, drank alcohol. In hell -insomnia, dp/dr, head pressure, anhedonia, no emotions, blank mind.
May/June '19 - 16 doses Rem CT, 10 doses 2mg Ativan. CT

Recovered Oct 2020-June 2022 - fully functional, working.  Only left with head pressure.

Major stresses - mainly financial, living space, relationship - severe insomnia, severe anxiety, depression, dp/dr, emotional numbness, blank mind

Sept 2022 - for sleep - took 8 doses of 15mg Remeron, 3 doses of 7.5mg, 3 doses of 3.75mg, 3 doses of 1.875mg

Link to comment

Did you crashed last days?

May - october 2017 - Mirtazapine from 7.5 - 12mg mg for insomnia

May - october 2017 Lyrica 100mg a day.

October-november 2017 - both mirt and Lyrica, or one of them went paradoxical, exteme vertigo after Lyrica. Cut down Lyrica to 3x25mg a day, same vertigo, CT Lyrica. Insomnia developed severe on 12 MG mirtazapine, reduced to 7.5, still insomnia, reduced to 3.75 still.insomnia. CT mirt. 

November 2017 - present burning feet, pins and needles, muscle spasms, myoclonus limbs, head, bugs crawling my head burning hands, left side worst. Ears cracking sensation.

May 2019 - put on gabapentin 100mg 4xday to counteract insomnia

Link to comment
On 5/17/2019 at 2:43 AM, uncomfortablynumb said:

Yeah,  even though I am anxious and depressed I am not sure if that is causing the insomnia, DP/DR, blank mind, no emotions etc.  Hard to prove what is happening.  I really want to know if people recover from these symptoms.  If not, quality of life is almost 0.  Add no sleep to that and it is truly Hell. 

I figure I must be getting microsleep or I would be dead by now.  

Hi I'm sorry you are going through this, I don't understand you CT Avitan? But you didn't take it everyday

2007-2016 citalopram 20mg -40mg

tappered and discontinued all of oct 2016 6 month taper  (wd symptom  insomnia and some ocd anxiety)

Nov.2016 -May 2017 cipralex 20mg

June-Sept 2017  xanax 0.25- 0.50mg   3 times a week

June 2017- Sept. 25.2017  Paxil  20mg - last week was 30mg bc of drug feeling reaction

Sept 27 - Oct 12 2017 Fluxatine 20mg

discontinuation Oct 13-18th 2017 withdrawal  from paxil and fluxatine

Reinstated Oct 19- 23 Fluxtine 10mg, Oct 24- 2 2017 Fluxatine 5mg,  Nov 2-19 2017   Fluxatine 10mg Dec-Jan 4 2018 Fluxatine 20mg, Reinstated Feb 18 2018  fluxatine 1mg, didnt work  June 6  Celexa  5mg than 10mg, June 3 Klonopin  .5 - 1mg,    june 11 oxazepam 5-10mg,   zopiclone in june  7.5mg  on and off,    June 24 reduced  to  5mg Celexa 

Nov. 20 2018 titration k  0.02mg reduction from 0.5- 0.380mg,  Nov.  25 2018  mourol 1 dose for cystitis

March started Brassmonkey method   0.30 k   current 0.28 kcelexa 5mgNov.2021 0.08 updose  0.09 feb. 2022 0.085k  march. 0.08 april 0.075k may0.070k june 0.065 june23  0.060

NOTE: using liquid Rivotril - 2 drops of (2.5mg) rivotril  with 20ml water 

 

 

Link to comment

I was taking Ativan once a week then up to twice on for the insomnia caused by withdrawal from other meds.  Living on microsleeps now.  Please somebody let me know if people recover from these symptoms.

2006-15 Effexor on and off mostly on. Also tried drugs that didn't work; notriptyline, Celexa, Zoloft, Welbutrin, Abilify, Pristiq, Cymbalta. Weaned off Effexor for last time quickly (2015) - horrible depression, anxiety, and insomnia.
Remeron (2016) helped wd symptoms. 
2017 - tapered off Rem over a few mths. Horrible wd symptoms with insomnia. Reinstating Remeron fail. For wd insomnia tried: Trazodone, Elavil, Gabapentin, Seroquel, Doxepin, Valium. Failed. 2mg Ativan at bed intermittent use 4mth.
CT Ativan - off all meds June '17.  Recovered by Oct '17 - well for a yr.
Oct '18-now. Major stresses, drank alcohol. In hell -insomnia, dp/dr, head pressure, anhedonia, no emotions, blank mind.
May/June '19 - 16 doses Rem CT, 10 doses 2mg Ativan. CT

Recovered Oct 2020-June 2022 - fully functional, working.  Only left with head pressure.

Major stresses - mainly financial, living space, relationship - severe insomnia, severe anxiety, depression, dp/dr, emotional numbness, blank mind

Sept 2022 - for sleep - took 8 doses of 15mg Remeron, 3 doses of 7.5mg, 3 doses of 3.75mg, 3 doses of 1.875mg

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

Terms of Use Privacy Policy