☼ Junglechicken

[Junglechicken]

Hey Sunny,

 

Oh no worries at all 😊

 

I don't think we ever get over such a huge loss(es).  

 

We have to allow ourselves to grieve (which isn't easy at all) as society wants us functioning as happy, shiny people. 

 

I have my "public" face, which is to remain professional (in the office), and of course cordial with everyone else.  Inside I am still a mess, but having an amazing therapist is a huge help.

 

Your loss of 2 siblings so close together is unusual.  Add to that a global pandemic, and the fact you are trying to taper off ADs..........

 

I'm back to work on the 26th Oct, boy do we need the income!  Will be a shock to the system, but fortunately, not a high pressure environment.

 

Health-wise, not bad.  My main problem is gut issues.  I think being in the peri-menopause is the cause of the majority of my symptoms.  Blood work has all been fine.  

 

Don't want to bore you with all that.

 

We are off camping to Norfolk on Friday.  Keeping fingers crossed the weather will be kind to us 🌧️🌤️

 

Hugs,

JC

 

 

[Guest]

On 5/23/2019 at 7:55 PM, Peachy said:

i got severe acne both times I came off of Lexapro... it's a WD symptom. 

how bad was your acne and for how long? 

[Junglechicken]

Hey Ryguy,

 

It's never really gone tbh.

 

I get outbreaks due to hormonal shifts, or when stressed.

 

JC

[Guest]

5 hours ago, Junglechicken said:

Hey Ryguy,

 

It's never really gone tbh.

 

I get outbreaks due to hormonal shifts, or when stressed.

 

JC

How long has it been going on

[Junglechicken]

Hi everyone,

 

Its been a while since I was last here, and, well, I'm back.  

 

My "healing journey" nose dived a few months ago due to (A-nother) toxic work situation.

 

I've been diagnosed with C-PTSD (Complex PTSD), and feel on death's door to be honest.

 

Multiple symptoms which never let up.  Whether this is WD, I don't know, but my nervous system is shot to pieces.

 

Apologies for the lack of chit chat, and positive news (I'll get to that later).

 

GP wants to get me back on to AD's..................blah, blah, blah.

 

EDMR therapy is on the cards, and I'm thinking CBD oil to calm the nerves.

 

Anyway, just checking in, and hope you are all well.

 

Take care,

 

JC

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Junglechicken]

Hi again,

 

I hope everyone is doing well.

 

Basically, I'm in recovery from a major PTSD "episode", and have been on long-term sick leave from work for almost 4 months.

 

As to when the PTSD first started, this is unknown.

 

I am having EMDR treatment (trauma therapy) as well as regular therapy. My GP prescribed beta-blockers for the anxiety state as I was experiencing SEVERE panic attacks and adrenaline surges, but I'm using naturopathic remedies instead.

 

What are the implications?

 

My career is F****d, and I don't think I can set foot in the corporate environment again.

 

I have an attorney involved as I believe the episode was "triggered" by my employers negligence.  On top of their negligence, they then tried to "manage me out" of the organisation without any warning.  My therapist labelled them "a narcissistic organisation".

 

Currently dealing with a suspected UTI.

 

It is said that women (in their 40s) who experienced trauma from an early age are highly likely to develop PTSD.  Not help by the peri-menopause/menopause.

 

Thinking of you all, and I'll continue to do updates when appropriate.

 

Take care,

 

JC xxx

 

 

[manymoretodays]

Oh Junglechicken, so sorry to hear that it has been so rough,

 

And oh my, I can relate to the PTS rearing up long after the drugs are gone, and the worst of the WD is over.  It has happened to me as well.  My Mum died too, and somehow that seemed to bring up some early childhood stuff that needed to be gotten after.  I lucked out with finding a wonderful, young tad of a fellow, psychologist, who is worth his weight in gold.  And then still have my mother LCSW on board too.

 

Oh, and the grief.  I expect it's still tough, post your loss of your Dad Jungle.  These things do take time.

 

Sweetie, things may change.  Nothing is ever fixed.  And better things may be coming your way.

(I hope that isn't too trite sounding)

 

So good to see you here too.  Why it's like a reunion!

Pop on back.

Good to see your update, hard to witness your struggle.....but I do understand, and I know you got this one, and will soon be seeing more sunshine......

 

L, P, H, and G,

mmt

 

I'm being told I need to take a wilderness break, by a friend now too, and so will.....I am not going to camp though, it's a bit chilly late fall/early winter here, but will get out and away from screens, people, and commotion, for a brief interlude.

Edited November 25, 2021 by manymoretodays

[Junglechicken]

Hi mmt,

 

Thank you for dropping in on my thread, and for your kindness and support, it is much appreciated 😊

 

I have been getting updates for other people's journey's in my inbox, and am so sorry that you lost your mother, its absolutely brutal I know.   The grief wells up, (seemingly out of nowhere), time and time again.

 

My father was my "anchor" in life, and I am sure he was quickly promoted by God to become one of the angels in heaven helping us earthlings get through life as best we can.  He was an angel.

 

The lady that does the EMDR therapy is a psychologist, and it was my therapist that suggested I could have PTSD, but she couldn't "diagnose" it.  I think this is my third "episode", but can't be sure.

 

Lets just say I am completely out of touch with what I'm supposed to be doing here on earth, and am trying to figure things out.  I can't navigate toxic workplaces (haven't got the tools) anymore.

 

 Yes, you're right, it is a reunion to be back here after a year (just checked my last message), almost a year exactly 🍾

 

Anyway, thanks again mmt, sending you hugs 🙏

 

Take care,

 

JC

 

P.S I envy you doing a wilderness break out there in the desert southwest.  Do you know of the Sasquatch people?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Junglechicken]

To quote MMT a couple of days ago, "Sweetie, things may change.  Nothing is ever fixed.  And better things may be coming your way."

(I hope that isn't too trite sounding)

 

WELL:

 

Yesterday, my employer emailed me saying that they are willing to put in place reasonable adjustments subject to my meeting with occupational health on 1st Dec.  For anyone with a disability (i.e protected characteristic), companies HAVE to put "reasonable" adjustments in place by law or they can be taken to an employment tribunal.

 

This is a BIG step in the right direction, but I still have the probation situation to navigate.

 

Thank you MMT for tempting positive fate 😀

 

Bye for now,

 

JC xxx

 

 

 

[manymoretodays]

 

On 11/25/2021 at 3:06 AM, Junglechicken said:

Do you know of the Sasquatch people?

Hmmm, no I don't know of the Sasquatch people.

I was thinking maybe a Canadian Native Tribe, or of Bigfoot.

So I googled.  Oh boy, sounds very much right up my alley.

https://www.amazon.com/Sasquatch-People-Their-Interdimensional-Connection/dp/0983369534

^ refers to book, available on Amazon.....the blurb sure grabbed me.

 

I did get to Inipi/sweat lodge yesterday.  Yay!  It's been a long, long time......and although I was aware of sweats occurring, just could not, would not budge.  It was powerful!  And needed.  So needed.

 

On 11/26/2021 at 4:05 AM, Junglechicken said:

Yesterday, my employer emailed me saying that they are willing to put in place reasonable adjustments subject to my meeting with occupational health on 1st Dec.  For anyone with a disability (i.e protected characteristic), companies HAVE to put "reasonable" adjustments in place by law or they can be taken to an employment tribunal.

 

I am thrilled that this came about.  And I've always wished for more recognition, for those of us who do get into protracted withdrawal syndrome, and then beyond.......so that we all might be eligible, for helpful services like occupational therapy, or building up on skills during healing- with support from the medical community that got us into this mess to begin with.

I'm not sure we will ever be supported by the pharmacologic executives, or even doctors of psychopharmacology!  Maybe.  Somewhere over the rainbow, eh?

 

Oh Jungle, good news indeed.  Keep up the good, hard work.

 

L, P, H, and G,

mmt

Edited November 28, 2021 by manymoretodays

[Frogie]

Hi @Junglechicken

 

How are you???

[Junglechicken]

17 hours ago, Frogie said:

Hi @Junglechicken

 

How are you???

 

Hi Frogie,

 

I hope you had a Happy Holidays and New Year 😊

 

Thank you for asking - Physically I am a wreck, haven't been to the gym in months.  I'm back on multiple supplements to keep "humpty" together.

 

During the holidays I thought I had CFS/ME.  We had done some cliff-top walking for 4 hours, I hadn't eaten or slept properly for a few days afterwards and I got hit with extreme fatigue for almost 2 weeks.

 

I can handle walking for an hour and yoga yin (not Yang as too intense), but anything else sets me off.

 

Anyway, all the usual nervous system issues really.  And then there are the muscle pains, IBS, migraines, infections, tinnitus, insomnia, inflammatory response to trauma (e.g interstitial cystitis), general gut issues, health anxiety.

 

I'm also on HRT, so have the added complication of hormones being out of whack exacerbating anxiety levels etc.,

 

April will be my annual medical checkup.  Not looking forward to it.

 

How are you Frogie? I hope 2022 is a better year for everyone.

 

Take care,

 

JC xx

[Frogie]

@Junglechicken

 

I'm really sorry you are going through all that. But you are treating it will supplements and yoga. You haven't allowed the dr to treat you with medication. That takes a lot of courage, but you already know what they do.

 

I hope you continue to heal and get better and better everyday.

 

2022 has be better for everyone! But we did enjoy the holidays thanks, hope you did too.

[Junglechicken]

On 1/15/2022 at 3:45 PM, Frogie said:

@Junglechicken

 

I'm really sorry you are going through all that. But you are treating it will supplements and yoga. You haven't allowed the dr to treat you with medication. That takes a lot of courage, but you already know what they do.

 

I hope you continue to heal and get better and better everyday.

 

2022 has be better for everyone! But we did enjoy the holidays thanks, hope you did too.

 

Hi everyone,

 

I hope you are ok.

 

My update is a mixed bag really as I have been struggling for weeks with an uptick in health anxiety, and general decline in health due to the PTSD/perimenopause double whammy.

 

GP keeps offering ADs, and I keep refusing.

 

My GP is sending me to see a urologist (for a cystoscopy) due to likely "Interstitial cystitis (IC)/painful bladder syndrome".  This flared up in November, and has come and gone repeatedly since then.  I reckon I had it 5 yrs ago, but my GP at the time didn't think I had it.

 

Its incurable, and is one of those illnesses that has to be "managed".

 

Also suspect I have fibro..........the IBS/IC/Fibro "trio".

 

I am also starting a new job soon, having left my toxic previous employer.

 

Its tough, as I worry whether I can hold down a job with all this physical stuff going on, and my mental health issues.

 

There is no doubt, that there is only so much stress and tension (in my case from the PTSD/perimeno) the body can take before it goes into a "diseased state".

 

It was only a matter of time.......

 

The positives:

 

New job starting soon

Trip to Germany for a week in a couple of weeks

Keeping a personal goal to walk the Southwest Coast Path here in the UK which is 630 miles long and and takes approx. 3 months (when you're slow like me, lol).  

 

Take care everyone,

 

Bye for now,

 

JC xx

[TrazodoneShouldBeIllegal18]

Can someone tell whether tinnitus goes away when your symptoms resolve?

[Ariel]

Hi @Junglechicken

How are you doing?

Just saying hello and thank you for your many informative posts. You have helped me. 

I'm sorry you are still struggling with various health issues. You have worked so hard and I hope you feel proud of your valiant efforts. 

The courage, patience, perseverance, generosity, kindness demonstrated here are awe-inspiring.

Thank you for all that you share.

I hope you feel better very soon. Wishing you moments of peace along the way,

A.  

[Junglechicken]

On 5/4/2022 at 11:30 AM, Ariel said:

Hi @Junglechicken

How are you doing?

Just saying hello and thank you for your many informative posts. You have helped me. 

I'm sorry you are still struggling with various health issues. You have worked so hard and I hope you feel proud of your valiant efforts. 

The courage, patience, perseverance, generosity, kindness demonstrated here are awe-inspiring.

Thank you for all that you share.

I hope you feel better very soon. Wishing you moments of peace along the way,

A.  

 

Hi Ariel,

 

My apologies for replying so late to your kind message, as I saw it come into my inbox some weeks ago.

 

Truly, I don't feel worthy of your praise, but your kind words are much appreciated - THANK YOU 🙂

 

By way of an update:

 

I think with the recovery journey "you win some and you lose some", and so I am trying to remain positive.

 

Having had some bloodwork done a couple of weeks ago, the results came back with anaemia and very low Vit D, which would explain the fatigue, palpitations, cog fog, weakness, muscle aches, dizziness, headaches and depression etc, etc., 

 

I am very grateful that it wasn't more serious, so I'm on iron and Vit D supplements for a few months.  

 

My therapist explained that I was experiencing a full blown "PTSD episode", which triggered horrendous health anxiety along with an "end of life" mindset.  EMDR therapy has been very tough, and it meant my energy levels took even more of a beating.

 

My initial consultation with the urologist is on the 7th July.

 

The positives:

 

My energy levels are starting to pick up again (did so immediately after getting the bloodwork results)

Have resumed yoga and walking longer distances

I quit sugar/junk food at the beginning of March (3 months ago), and am also on an anti-inflammatory diet.  

Have taken a break from EMDR (its a marathon not a sprint), as it was having negative repercussions on my body.  Plan to resume once energy levels are more "normal".

Feeling more optimistic

Plan to get cycling with my husband and work on the allotment again.

Hopefully my work performance will improve (this is always a concern)

 

Anyway, that's it from me.

 

Wishing you all continued steady recovery. 

 

It does get better, don't lose hope 🙂

 

JC xx 

 

 

 

[Ariel]

Hi @Junglechicken

Thanks for posting an update. It's great to read how you're doing!

 

Sounds like you really are doing a good job of staying positive. Kudos!

Glad you're seeing improvements from the supplements and also noticing results from your other initiatives, such as quitting sugar and resuming exercise. Well done.

 

Continued steady recovery to you, too <3

 

[Junglechicken]

By way of a footnote:

 

I started reading "The Body keeps the score" by Bessel van der Kolk.

 

Highly recommend it, extremely well written.

 

I am finding that many of the questions I had about my life, and the physical health issues I have experienced lie within this book.

 

For years I couldn't even focus on reading a book, so recovery is definitely happening, as I am now able to ready pretty quickly and remain focused on the content without losing concentration.

[Junglechicken]

8 minutes ago, Ariel said:

Hi @Junglechicken

Thanks for posting an update. It's great to read how you're doing!

 

Sounds like you really are doing a good job of staying positive. Kudos!

Glad you're seeing improvements from the supplements and also noticing results from your other initiatives, such as quitting sugar and resuming exercise. Well done.

 

Continued steady recovery to you, too ❤️

 

 

Thank you Ariel 😍

 

Congrats are in order on your becoming a Mod! 

 

I'm way out of date on staff changes etc.,

[Pepms]

Hi @Junglechicken how have you been? i was reading your story and it is very encouraging! i have a question, do you remember  if when you did the cipralex incorrect tapering you got paresthesia kind of symptoms? burning sensations? tingling etc? 

[Junglechicken]

1 hour ago, Pepms said:

Hi @Junglechicken how have you been? i was reading your story and it is very encouraging! i have a question, do you remember  if when you did the cipralex incorrect tapering you got paresthesia kind of symptoms? burning sensations? tingling etc? 

 

Hi Pepms,

 

Thanks for your message, I'm glad Mondays over!

 

I do recall experiencing stinging and electric shock sensations when I incorrectly tapered off Cipralex.

 

Funnily enough, I experience it more now that I am in the perimenopause.  There are no underlying medical causes either.

 

Hope this helps.

 

Hugs,

 

JC

 

 

[Pepms]

1 hour ago, Junglechicken said:

 

Hi Pepms,

 

Thanks for your message, I'm glad Mondays over!

 

I do recall experiencing stinging and electric shock sensations when I incorrectly tapered off Cipralex.

 

Funnily enough, I experience it more now that I am in the perimenopause.  There are no underlying medical causes either.

 

Hope this helps.

 

Hugs,

 

JC

 

 

Thanks a lot for your answer, i have a question, back then when you reinstated 2.5mg, did it get better? ive been off after probably incorrect tapering 3 months and considering reinstating 

[Junglechicken]

8 hours ago, Pepms said:

Thanks a lot for your answer, i have a question, back then when you reinstated 2.5mg, did it get better? ive been off after probably incorrect tapering 3 months and considering reinstating 

 

Hi,

 

Yes, it got better immediately after re-instating.

 

Not sure what I would have done without the folk at SA guiding me through the process.

 

They are the most knowledgeable on how to do it.

 

Best,

 

JC

[peaceandlove]

Hello I see in your posts you’ve struggled with ibs & reflex. I was wondering if that cleared up for you eventually with time??

 

im having the same stomach issues 

[Junglechicken]

Hi Peace and love,

 

Sorry to hear you're suffering with gut issues.  It's miserable I know.

 

I quit refined sugar and processed foods 6 months ago, and the reflux has stopped (with the exception of certain yoga poses after breakfast).

 

The IBS is linked to hormones and mood/anxiety levels.

 

I am also on Ferrous fumarate and  ferrous bi-glycinate for anaemia which can cause gut issues, but I am taking a probiotic (s.Boulardii) to try and counter this.

 

Can you look into whether you have any intolerances?  Remove inflammatory foods and see if that helps?

 

Best,

JC

 

[Junglechicken]

Hi SA warriors,

 

Thought I'd do a bit of an update as it's been a while.

 

So, I've come to the end of the "treatment" for anaemia and low Vit D and am waiting for my bloodwork results.  GP requested FBC as well to be on the safe side I think (and hope).  Feeling a lot better now except......

 

Then the heatwave in Europe (and the UK hit), mid-July which threw my anxiety a curveball, and I ended up in a PTSD episode again or with heat intolerance anxiety (hyperthermia).  

 

Still dealing with the fallout from this, as I ended up with a lot of symptoms caused by heat intolerance anxiety (hyperthermia), and had crampy and painful legs, a varicose vein came up on my left quad, my lymph nodes went up for a week, had BV (ladies know this one) which hung around for a few weeks and I was prescribed ABs (Metronizadole) for 7 days and I also developed IBS in my small intestine which has caused pain in my pelvic area; and my hair is falling out.  I have also missed 2 periods, had panic attacks, along with sweating and palpitations.  Now I have caught a cold from my beloved SO.

 

I also had a bladder ultrasound and urinary tract ultrasound, urinary flow test as I thought I had interstitial cystitis and spoke to a consultant urologist.  Everything was clear which again was fortunate.

 

Weight loss is going well in as much as it's on a steady downward trajectory and I have lost something like 17Ibs in total on the anti-inflammatory /no refined sugar or processed food diet.  The weight loss has taken a lot longer due to the anaemia, anxiety and my age.  Any "high anxiety" episodes or illness slow down progress as the body is working hard on those things and will put a stop on any weight loss as part of survival.

 

Fortunately, I'm still working and am moving into the 6th month of employment.   I still have difficulty interacting with people, and don't trust people.  The last 3 employers were a total toxic nightmare, but I also played a part (re-enacting past trauma) which I'm working on in therapy.

 

I'm still dreaming of walking the Southwest Coast Path (all 630 miles of it) here in the UK, solo when I turn 50.

 

My biggest blocker is me - FEAR has overshadowed much of my life for about a decade now.

 

I was diagnosed with Generalised Anxiety Order by my therapist (who specialises in trauma), and my GP, and of course I also have health anxiety and PTSD.  They are co-morbid mental health illnesses.

 

Hopefully I'll be "well" enough to do the "long walk" as I call it when the time comes.

 

Hang in there everyone, this is a journey, and there are and will be setbacks, but we're all still here and carrying on.

 

Hugs,

 

JC xx

 

 

 

 

[manymoretodays]

Yay!  Thanks for the update and sounds pretty good Jungle.

Oh my gosh, so sorry about the loss of the Queen.  Whoosh......that was a biggie.  What a reign too!  Wow.

Hugs back to you.

L, P, H, and G,

mmt

[Junglechicken]

5 hours ago, manymoretodays said:

Yay!  Thanks for the update and sounds pretty good Jungle.

Oh my gosh, so sorry about the loss of the Queen.  Whoosh......that was a biggie.  What a reign too!  Wow.

Hugs back to you.

L, P, H, and G,

mmt

 

Thanks mmt,

 

Yes historic changes for the UK.

 

Not sure if you guys tuned in to the Queen's funeral on TV on the 19th.  We watched it the whole day.  No wonder it took years to plan.

 

Beautifully done and very moving.  Especially when the cortege passed her horse "Emma" and the corgis at the end.

 

Still getting use to saying "King Charles III" which seems odd.

 

The end of an era.......

 

Back to the mundane - blood work all fine and I suspect I still have IC which wouldn't have shown up in the ultrasounds.

 

Hugs,

 

JC