Destroyed: destroyed by olanzapine

[Petunia]

Hi Destroyed,

I joined the new topic you started with your original thread here. Its one intro/update topic per member. Please add information and updates about your changing circumstances, and ask questions here, bookmark or follow your thread it so you can find it again.

 

Its good that you are motivated to get better, that's a great start and the first step in actually getting better. Lack of motivation is common, it goes away in time like all the symptoms. I've got it too. The way I handle it is to force myself to do what I have to do, gently encourage myself to do the things I want to do and ignore the rest. As time goes by, its getting easier.

 

You may find some other ideas here:  Anhedonia, apathy, demotivation - Surviving Antidepressants

[Destroyed]

Are you still in hospital, I am.  I have lost my children home and business.

[Destroyed]

First time in 2 years I am going home to stay overnight at my Mums house. no green light in my room keeping me awake at night.  My tummy is happy because I am hungry  and I can make my sons a spaghetti bolognaise

[apace41]

Great news, Destroyed!

 

Should be great for you.

 

I merged this into your intro topic since we have a one topic per member on the Intro thread rule.

 

Best,

 

Andy

[Destroyed]

hi everyone

 

i did a week of groups and i am staying overnight at my mums and cooking my kids a meal.  most of all i am hoping to sleep well here.  the rehab i am in has banned me from using this site while i am there so they have cut off my support network, great huh. bastards.

[nz11]

Wow that is so disgraceful criminal that they took away online support.

 

I am so sorry to hear about that. In acute wdl it was my only source of hope at times and to imagine not having access to it (or to be banned from it as some were at prior place ) would have been devastating.

 

Destroyed just a gentle reminder in the intro section its only one thread per member.

[bubble]

Hello Sam,

 

as nz said, we have one thread per member policy so I merged your new thread with the original one.

 

I'm very impressed with all the progress you have made since joining us, even supporting others. It's really horrible that they are keeping you away from the site. But I believe this will only motivate you to continue improving so that you can leave from there. 

 

I hope your weekend goes well. Just stay positive. Every little improvement is an important victory. Together we can beat this.

[bubble]

And I forgot to add: now you can ask for your name here to be changed into something that will reflect your strength in beating this I think the way to do it is just send a pm to Alto.

[apace41]

And I forgot to add: now you can ask for your name here to be changed into something that will reflect your strength in beating this I think the way to do it is just send a pm to Alto.

 

Fantastic idea, Bubble!

 

How about we go to "Destroying Olazapine"?

 

Shows a real change in perspective which seems to mirror your change since coming on.

 

Best,

 

Andy

[nz11]

 But I believe this will only motivate you to continue improving so that you can leave from there. 

 

Exactly.

[Destroyed]

Going home for Xmas ???? been banned from using this site by the rehab. Started hot yoga physically am much improved but still no emotions memories are gradually coming. Sleep is slightly better. Tribunal on the 19th.

[ang]

?Wow destroyed, only a month or so and what progress you have made.    Well done!   Gosh I was a blithering mess for months!  12 months is now over, for me, and yes, believe everyone when they say things do improve.

12 months ago?  For me, major hair loss, withdrawal flu, mornings vomiting, horrific diahorrea,  hot and cold flushes,   the worst for me was ruminations, guilt, and of course, chronic fatigue, more than fatigue, just inability to motivate.   

For me, I could not force myself to do things, now I am feeling so much better, finally I can cook, and clean, most days.

 

My youngest is 18, he kept me going when that evil black cloud enveloped me,  he wanted me to live, even though I did not feel worthy to live.  Those thoughts are long gone now....   

 

time to change your name.....   destroyer?   never destroyed, you are a fighter.

[ang]

Oh, I also had no appetite, I never worried about it, as long as I ate something every second day. If you can eat well, of course, do so.   But dont stress if you have no appetite, unless severely underweight.  Me I still got about 10 kilos of Antidepressant induced fat to shed, so not a problem having no appetite for me  

Have a wonderful christmas with your family.................

[Destroyed]

Thanks ang. I still have a long way to go. Today I have set up Facebook cos I think it could help. I do have an appetite now for the last 3 weeks. I can now feel my muscles and sweat now too so physically I am almost there but mentally everything has all gone. God knows if any of it will come back.

[Destroyed]

4 hours sleep dream of being on the x factor wtf had enough of little sleep and feeling no better

[Destroyed]

My eyes have started streaming has anyone else had this in their recovery and what does it mean I don't have a cold.

[Destroyed]

*note, topic moved from symptoms forum because it evolved into a discussion about member's specific situation rather than the particular topic. Please use your own intro/update topic to discuss your own situation and ask questions.

 

Can anyone relate to this, did your emotions or memories ever come back, I can't stand this anymore I've tried everything and nothing helps, I can't enjoy being with my children please help me some one I cannot go on

Edited December 29, 2015 by Petunia
added note

[kup0]

for memory the best are the phospholipids, particularly phosphatidylserine and phosphatidylcolina, anhedonia is because you have no frontal lobe, I too passed, neuroleptics destroy the frontal lobe creating apathy, but this is corrected over time and motivation returns. Best to recover the frontal lobe is the omega 3-6 NKO is very important to be NKO, as this has phospholipids and astaxantina, I have taken 4-5 months ago and motivation is driving me. If you are really bad you can try mucuna puriens, at most 3 times a week, leaving a day room for the brain does not get used, it contains synthetic dopamine, which is the basis of motivation and movement.

 

Become an analysis of all amino acids and rebalance, you have an excess of tryptophan, and low taurine and phospholipids.

 

PS: mucuna puriens can create psychosis if you are very sensitive, be careful with the dosage.
I run my me, but I have not psychosis, but would not recommend to anyone with real psychosis. take very small doses, 50-100mg. if and only if it is really too bad this has a lot of motivation or extrapyramidal symptoms.

 

This is what I think at least from what I've studied videos of Javier Aizpiri.

 

sorry my english, original text:

 

 

para la memoria lo mejor son los fosfolipidos, en concreto fosfatidilserina y fosfaditilcolina, la anhedonia es debido a que ya no tienes lobulo frontal, a mi tambien me pasa, los neurolepticos destruyen el lobulo frontal creando apatia, pero esto se corrige con el tiempo y la motivación vuelve. Lo mejor para recuperar el lobulo frontal es el omega 3-6 NKO, es muy importante que sea NKO, ya que este tiene fosfolipidos y astaxantina, yo lo he tomado hace 4-5 meses y la motivacion me esta volviendo. Si estas muy mal puedes probar mucuna puriens, como mucho 3 veces a la semana, dejando un dia de espacio para que el cerebro no se acostumbre, esto contiene dopamina sintetica, que es la base de la motivación y el movimiento.

 

Hazte un analisis de todos los aminoacidos y re-equilibrar, debes tener un exceso de triptofano, y baja la taurina y fosfolipidos.

 

[Destroyed]

thank you i shall order some asap.  i just cant believe those pills have caused me to have 0 quality of life

[KarenB]

Have you seen this thread?  Anhedonia, apathy, demotivation, emotional numbness

 

I'll merge these topics so all the discussions stays in one place and is easier for people to find. 

[brassmonkey]

DO NOT TAKE mucuna puriens if you are currently taking ssris, snris, or maois as it can cause severe adverse reactions. 

Taking it to help with recovery after quitting ALL psychotropic drugs is not recommended because it acts on the same receptors that you are in the process of repairing.

 

As for the phospholipids, phosphatidylserine and phosphatidylcolina, they are of no documented use in recovery from ADWD or in "rebuilding the brain".  They have very little experimental validation to be of any use for anything other than general health.

 

The one study that "showed that neuroleptics destroy the frontal lobe" was discredited years ago.

[kup0]

if you are taking any psychiatric drug, do not take mucuna puriens, very dangerous, but I worked my eight months after leaving all medication. Always consult your doctor.

 

all neuroleptics damaged dopaminergic receptors, which are found mainly in frontal lobe and basal ganglia (substantia nigra, or why you think appear movement disorders?), frontal lobe shuts down, this has been shown with PETs (Positron Emission Tomography) if you want to try it, tell your doctor to PET and watch as your frontal lobe and the whole brain works.

http://www.bonkersinstitute.org/graymatter.html

PET on diverse drugs: https://youtu.be/l2bUSbqhU-M?t=1m53s

 

There are many studies on Phosphatidylserine it helps memory and cognition, helps prevent Alzheimer's and dementia.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Phosphatidylserine#Memory_and_cognition

 

search for "phosphatidylserine memory", and see the amount of investigation.

 

 

but you do not believe me, I'm not a doctor, ask your doctor, or take charge of your life, you investigate and decide. It will certainly be healed, and it will improve, try to be optimistic, this is solvable. Take care and remove all toxic, including nicotine, coffee, etc .. psychoactive stimulant not take anything, and that includes mucuna puriens. See improvement and is quieter.

[Destroyed]

I'm on no drugs at all. My body is recovering well but the lack of emotions and memory is killing me.

[Petunia]

Destroyed, I'm sorry you are still having memory and emotion problems. I understand how difficult it is, I've been going through the same thing as I've been recovering, I'm also no longer on any drugs and having to be patient as I recover.  Like you, I feel like there are huge chunks of my memory missing, from when I was medicated and since I've been recovering, but very slowly memories are coming back. Its difficult to know how accurate they are, but when something does come back, it makes me feel like I'm starting to make connections again.

 

I also lost most of my emotional feelings towards my daughter and family. I knew I still loved them and cared about them, but I couldn't feel it and had to function from how I remembered I used to be, but it was very hard, it still is at times, but like with memory, these emotional feelings are slowly coming back.

 

Recovery can take quite a long time for some people and our full range of emotions are one of the last things to come back online. You are going to recover, and the best way to do this is to accept your symptoms, be patient and do the best you can to take care of yourself with a healthy diet and lifestyle. Throwing unpredictable herbs and supplements at your nervous system will just make you worse and slow your recovery.

 

kup0, please don't recommend other members take substances which may harm them, people can get hurt if they listen to your advice. You may discuss your own experiences in your own thread or in the relevant topic, but you are not a doctor and not qualified to know what would help anyone else, we are all different and many of us have been made worse by trying supplements and herbs which others have recommended.

 

A nervous system sensitized by withdrawal functions in unpredictable ways. Herbs and supplements which can sometimes be helpful in a healthy nervous system can sometimes cause paradoxical effects if someone is in withdrawal.

 

If you do decide to try a herb or supplement, start with a fraction of the recommended dose to see how it will effect you.

[kup0]

He has petunia reason. It was foolish on my part, all I can say is that amino acid analysis is done to see if you have any deficiency or excess, this causing the failure memory.

 

test example: http://www.healthlinkpartners.com/testkits/images/test-pdf/Amino%20Acids%20Urine.pdf

 

Recommendations that do not need drugs or supplements are:

 

for anhedonia:

Try finding motivating things can remaining few things, but try to go looking, music, any activity should be something that makes you feel something, look it up and try to do everything I can to stimulate the brain.

 

for memory:

Make puzzle games, brain training, cognifit.com try eg think 10 animals that start with the word C, etc .. relate socially, and physically active.

[Destroyed]

Am doing all of these things. Thank you petunia and kupo.

[KarenB]

Hello Destroyed,

 

It can feel so very disheartening when you are doing everything you can think of, but still finding no relief.  I'm sorry you're in that place.  From what I've read on this site from people who are further down the track, things do improve.  The fact that you've had some improvements such as appetite is encouraging.  You will continue to heal.  Be gentle with yourself - you are a precious person. 

 

Hugs,

Karen

[kup0]

Sorry my bad English.

But if it does not improve much I insist that amino acid analysis is made, as amino acids are the building blocks the body uses to build.

 

If you are doing all that and no improvement is a sign to look more food, and see what is wrong, and that the analysis should be done, because the eye is very difficult to see, even for an expert.

 

So I understand. If I get to do much physical exercise to get strong, but not as protein and eat a poor diet, the body that will do is destroy the muscle and fat to get the energy spent in physical exercise, and instead gain muscle you will lose and will be counterproductive.

 

It is very important to make sure you have all the correct balance to start doing mental exercises amino acids, because if will not only heat but the brain become stressed and more.

 

When taking the drug changes the brain to function with the drug, when removed, the brain has to re-adapt, and for that you need the amino acids starts to consume to re-adapt more intensely so exhausted faster, and shortages and excesses of others appear.

[KarenB]

Amino acids are discussed at this link:  http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/2637-amino-acids/

 

And in particular from Alto:  Withdrawal is an entirely different animal from plain ol' depression. Remedies that are supposed to treat depression, including amino acids, often backfire in people whose nervous systems are sensitized by withdrawal.

 

Kup0 we recognise that you are trying to help - your heart is in the right place - but we need to stick to what has been learned here by large numbers of people.  Otherwise people could get hurt.   

[kup0]

Human beings are not so different from an animal, like the drugs tested in rats and monkeys is something because we are very similar.

 

Of course after taking the drug, many amino acids are very high, if you take these amino acids is going to get much worse.

You need to know exactly which amino acids are missing, and being with a control diet a few weeks / months, and recovery will appear.

 

I doi realize this now, my recovery has been very fast compared to many here, I've had a very good diet, and am worried about taking things that I need, I look at the past and realize that here is the key. And this is supported by several experts neurologists, as Gurutz Linazasoro and Javier Aizpiri.

 

I do not know because it will be wrong to take an amino acid which has a large deficit, on the contrary, it should improve to anyone. But to know that you lack the analysis you need, because if you're wrong, bad consequences.

[kup0]

but hey, if it bothers you hear so much talk about this, which is what is being used quite successfully to detoxify people psycho drugs, because here was because the Basque government could not pay the bill of neuroleptics are some super expensive drugs, and had to detoxify a lot of people and for that hired Javier Aizpiri, expelled and fined him after several years to speak of amino acids and detoxification.

 

Other things that may help:

 

Sleep in complete darkness. If you sleep with a light brain does not produce melatonin and we'll ****.

 

Sleep with total silence, especially just when you sleep you. Many people sleep with the radio or the radio under the pillow, that's the best way to break your brain. because you do not rest and wake altered nothing. Buy earplugs.

 

Breakfast very important, if not eat breakfast, very bad business.

Take plenty of fruits and vegetables contain flavonoids, which are a powerful antioxidant and purifies the body.

 

Now I do not remember more.

[Destroyed]

There's a green light in the room that I cannot turn off so sleeping in darkness is not possible

[kup0]

Solution:

[brassmonkey]

We won't dispute the virtues of getting good sleep, healthy eating and gentle exercise.  They are the back bone of recovery.  We have extensive experience with just about every supplement/cure made and have found that in most cases they do not help and quite frequently cause even more problems.  That is why we can't recommend that people try them.

 

I am very glad that these things have worked for you and am truly happy that you are recovering.

[kup0]

okay, I do not want to discuss, I'm the first to be wrong here with my first posts and recommendations, and acknowledge my mistake, especially with mucuna puriens, can cause much damage.

I understand that I can not know supplement can make you right or wrong, that is precisely why I say that the analysis is done, because so you can know with 100% certainty and consulting with a doctor / nutritionist.

 

Here we are with severe cognitive problems because of these drugs so the first thing we should know is that little attention should be asking each other. But you say that if you sleep well and exercise ... but so far nobody seems to have asked her if she sleep with light or not, because if sleeping with the light is like not sleeping. If not produce melatonin on sleep not regulate serotonin and can not correct all its chemical imbalance, if it significantly delay recovery.

 

I recommend here, so that instead of drowning in your sorrows and symptoms, things begin to ask, because she said that sleeps well, but be sleeping with the light, warn that it is impossible to recover well.

Now I understand why this so upset, so nervous and so angry, is that if you sleep with this light the brain for disaster.

 

If everything is done right, and you're not destroying the brain with bad habits in 6-12 months you have all the symptoms disappear, after having left the drug in a progressive way 10% or less. (Except cognitive and some other that are the most persistent) And what I see here is that there are people with problems for many years, something bad is doing all these people.

[Petunia]

If everything is done right, and you're not destroying the brain with bad habits in 6-12 months you have all the symptoms disappear...

 

 

This is just not true. Some people recover faster and other people take longer. We don't know why this is. Some people doing everything 'right' can still take a long time. Its impossible to know how long each person will take. Some factors involved may be related to individual genetics, what drugs were taken and for how long, how the drugs were stopped, other medical conditions, current situation, stress levels, the person's age.

 

If you do the best you can to improve the factors you have some control over, things we have found helpful, from the thousands of experiences shared here, and on other sites, then you are giving yourself the best possible chance to recover faster, rather than slower. But having said that, remember that everyone is different and what helps one person, could make someone else feel worse. But no short cuts to recovery have been found, only things which can sometimes improve symptoms a little as we wait for recovery. Beyond taking care of ourselves sensibly, patience and acceptance as we let time pass is the best way to provide the calming attitude needed for recovery.

 

Destroyed, if you are sleeping ok with a small green light in your room and its not bothering you, then don't worry about it. If your sleep is disturbed, then you may want to try the suggestion kup made of the sleep mask.

 

If we look hard enough, we can find studies about every environmental factor and how it effects some aspect of our functioning, including brain activity. But its impossible to know how accurate much of this research is and quite often there are inconclusive results from different studies and conflicting opinions about what these results mean. Test subjects are people with healthy, normally functioning brains, so even if the results are accurate, its impossible to know what they might mean for a person with a sensitized, erratically functioning nervous system.

 

kup, as Karen said, I know you mean well and are trying to help, but telling someone what they need to do based on unreliable information is not helpful. Nor is saying that sleeping with a light is a disaster for the brain and they wont recover. This is not true, you are frightening people, please stop.

 

As I wrote previously:

 

You may discuss your own experiences in your own thread or in the relevant topic, but you are not a doctor and not qualified to know what would help anyone else...