Kiki2015: tapering Abilify

[kiki2015]

On 18/02/2018 at 4:08 PM, Rosetta said:

I understand how angry you feel.  I feel it, too.  I know that some doctors feel so much satisfaction from "helping people" that they don't realize when they should take a step back and see that they could be doing harm.  I also understand the feeling of being tired.  I am so unbelievably tired.  This entire experience has taken its toll.  All I can do is keep going, and that's all you can do, as well.  If I could make your doctors listen to your dystonia complaint I would, but you must demand, in writing, that you see a neurologist to have tests or examinations, Kiki.  You have a right to adequate health care and that includes side effect investigation and amelioration.  Ask for this in writing.  What about your health care advocate?  Can she help you write a request?

Sadly Rosetta, the harm was intentional not an accident. It's made me very very bitter. I had my medical records which they tried to hide but which I managed to get hold of where one consultant wrote to another let's harm her brain mockingly. Yet I was supposed to have no access to this whatsoever. There is a clause where third party information has to be hidden from patients. Why? Why should there be third parties. What I went through was scandalous. It was horrible. Doctors can cause harm and kill without detection and they do, they do. 

[kiki2015]

On 18/02/2018 at 9:08 PM, bhasski said:

 

Kiki,

What you have written is exactly i feel.. 

My necknis pulled with throat feels like strangled.. its like sitff everywhere  and I feel hell tired .. 

Memory is gone .. like my personality i gone.

Sometimes when I try to remember my past , it doesnt give any feeling of myself. It hurts bcoz i knw its mine... and still feels like others memory.

 

Ssris and Aps and snri and then mood  stabilizers .. idiots have ruined me.

 

 

Which medications were you on?

[kiki2015]

Have you stopped them? If so when did you stop them. How long have you been off them?

[bhasski]

Yes .. I have been off all CT. Its been 24 mos..

You can read the drugs in my signature.

Inshort there are many switches in 2.5 yrs of takin them.

 

[Rosetta]

19 hours ago, kiki2015 said:

Sadly Rosetta, the harm was intentional not an accident. It's made me very very bitter. I had my medical records which they tried to hide but which I managed to get hold of where one consultant wrote to another let's harm her brain mockingly. Yet I was supposed to have no access to this whatsoever. There is a clause where third party information has to be hidden from patients. Why? Why should there be third parties. What I went through was scandalous. It was horrible. Doctors can cause harm and kill without detection and they do, they do. 

Oh, I'm very upset to hear that.  Of course you feel bitter. 

[kiki2015]

12 hours ago, bhasski said:

Yes .. I have been off all CT. Its been 24 mos..

You can read the drugs in my signature.

Inshort there are many switches in 2.5 yrs of takin them.

 

You should have withdrawn from them.

[bhasski]

Didn't get you .. by withdrawn?

 

If you saying taper.. then its same as many here at SA. .. I came to know about taper late .. was almost 7-8 months I have been without drugs.. and was in fear and hell suffering to make a decision of reinstatement and taper.

 

I was very unstable then.. unstable now too.. but better 

[kiki2015]

On 20/02/2018 at 5:51 PM, Rosetta said:

Oh, I'm very upset to hear that.  Of course you feel bitter. 

But I have found a nicer psychiatrist now. It just might be too late. Thank you Rosetta for your moral support. What does it feel like to be off medications? I wish I could get there but I know I have a long way to go. 

[Rosetta]

5 minutes ago, kiki2015 said:

But I have found a nicer psychiatrist now. It just might be too late. Thank you Rosetta for your moral support. What does it feel like to be off medications? I wish I could get there but I know I have a long way to go. 

 

Too late for?

 

Being off has been difficult because I didn't taper slowly.  I have a lot more healing to do.

[kiki2015]

On 05/01/2018 at 8:52 AM, UnfoldingSky said:

 

Yes the TD went away.  I understand what you mean about it impacting every aspect of life, my situation was the same way.  I have a few residual issues from the pills--some memory loss, fatigue, overall cog issues.  But am so much better than I was. 

 

 

 

You were on antidepressants. Anti psychotics are worse. 

[UnfoldingSky]

2 hours ago, kiki2015 said:

You were on antidepressants. Anti psychotics are worse. 

 

I agree, they are worse  and I was on them too...given "off label for agitation" for the reaction to the antidepressant.  What I really had was akathisia. 

 

 

 

[kiki2015]

On 25/12/2017 at 10:29 PM, Altostrata said:

Welcome, kiki.

 

Dystonia is a serious adverse effect of your drugs. You need to calmly and tenaciously communicate this to your doctors. You need to minimize your drugs, but you will also need to manage your behavior so you don't get sent to hospital, where they will give you more drugs.

 

See Tips for tapering off aripiprazole (Abilify)

Thank you for the information Altostrata

[kiki2015]

On 01/01/2018 at 3:10 AM, nz11 said:

If you feel your doctor is not playing ball get a second opinion.

I see you live in the UK then how about seeing someone on the Rxisk Healy team. Could they be more helpful.

 

You could look into finding Joanna Moncrieff I don't know if she is practicing anywhere. Maybe she can point you to someone helpful if not.

 

I tried that. She wouldn't see me. She made excuses. She's only interested in herself. All psychiatrists, from my experience, are only interested in their self aggrandisement. 

[Rosetta]

Hi, Kiki.

[kiki2015]

On 04/03/2018 at 7:23 PM, Rosetta said:

Hi, Kiki.

Hello Rosetta,

I spoke to my psychiatrist. She told me tardive dystonia is reversible. This makes me feel better. 

[kiki2015]

18 hours ago, kiki2015 said:

Hello Rosetta,

I spoke to my psychiatrist. She told me tardive dystonia is reversible. This makes me feel better. 

How are you Rosetta?

 

[Rosetta]

Hi Kiki,

 

I'm ok.  I don't "feel" ok, but I can see that, from an objective point of view, I'm ok.  I'm trying to ignore the "neuro-emotions."  I'm trying to stay off the forum, too, in the hope that something will change so that I can feel ok.  I'm happy that your psychiatrist said something that made you feel better.  My dystonia is very, very slowly getting better.  It's absurd that I am 12 month off the drugs and it's not gone, but this entire experience is the most absurd thing I can imagine.  

 

It's quite difficult for me to think of positive things to say these days.  I'm sure that will change, too.  It's Spring here.  I understand you are still in an intense winter.  I'm hope you are feeling ok and that your Spring will arrive early.  You haven't had much to say here lately.  I hope that means you are doing all right.

 

Peace, Rosetta

 

 

[RealMe]

On 3/7/2018 at 12:08 PM, kiki2015 said:

I spoke to my psychiatrist. She told me tardive dystonia is reversible. This makes me feel better. 

Boy-o-boy!  This is great news.  I cold turkeyed off abilify on my psychiatrist's advice because of tremors and tardive dystonia!  I had been told that it might not have been caused by abilify (unlikely) and that it probably would not go away (by a neurologist and a gp).  It has been 7 months since my last dose of abilify, and although still present, the dystonia has improved.  Your doctor's opinion makes me feel better too.  Thanks for posting hope.

Best,

RM

[kiki2015]

12 hours ago, Rosetta said:

Hi Kiki,

 

I'm ok.  I don't "feel" ok, but I can see that, from an objective point of view, I'm ok.  I'm trying to ignore the "neuro-emotions."  I'm trying to stay off the forum, too, in the hope that something will change so that I can feel ok.  I'm happy that your psychiatrist said something that made you feel better.  My dystonia is very, very slowly getting better.  It's absurd that I am 12 month off the drugs and it's not gone, but this entire experience is the most absurd thing I can imagine.  

 

It's quite difficult for me to think of positive things to say these days.  I'm sure that will change, too.  It's Spring here.  I understand you are still in an intense winter.  I'm hope you are feeling ok and that your Spring will arrive early.  You haven't had much to say here lately.  I hope that means you are doing all right.

 

Peace, Rosetta

 

 

I'm not exactly doing all right. I have just given up hope slightly. Sometimes I just cannot be bothered.

 

 

[Rosetta]

There's a lot of hope, Kiki, but we can't always see it.  I have improved immensely.

[kiki2015]

On 09/03/2018 at 3:30 PM, Rosetta said:

There's a lot of hope, Kiki, but we can't always see it.  I have improved immensely.

How long did it take you?

Were you on any antipsychotics?

[Rosetta]

Well, I'm improving every month it seems.  I get a little better overall every 2-4 weeks or so.  Then I fall back some.  Sometimes it seems like I fall back a lot.  When I'm in a wave, I can't see my through, but when I return to even a small window, I feel hope.  When I'm in a better window I can look back and see what has improved and how much it has improved.  

 

No, I wasn't on anti-psychotics, but I think the main issue -- central nervous system destabilization -- is the same.  Whether you have particular problems because of anti-psychotics or not I think that when the CNS begins to find a balance you will feel much better.  

[kiki2015]

On 17/03/2018 at 7:02 PM, Rosetta said:

Well, I'm improving every month it seems.  I get a little better overall every 2-4 weeks or so.  Then I fall back some.  Sometimes it seems like I fall back a lot.  When I'm in a wave, I can't see my through, but when I return to even a small window, I feel hope.  When I'm in a better window I can look back and see what has improved and how much it has improved.  

 

No, I wasn't on anti-psychotics, but I think the main issue -- central nervous system destabilization -- is the same.  Whether you have particular problems because of anti-psychotics or not I think that when the CNS begins to find a balance you will feel much better.  

Psychiatrists have lied to me. They told me I could come off medications but I'm still on them. Is was a complete lie. 

[Rosetta]

Yes, that is what they believed.  I'm sorry.  I feel the same sense of betrayal.  They should have been more careful and considered the possible consequences.

[kiki2015]

On 19/03/2018 at 9:31 PM, Rosetta said:

Yes, that is what they believed.  I'm sorry.  I feel the same sense of betrayal.  They should have been more careful and considered the possible consequences.

No, they knew what they were doing was wrong. They did. 

[Rosetta]

You were there.  So, you would know better than I would.  How does it make you feel to think about that fact: that they knew what they were doing was wrong?  Does it make you feel bad?  If so, perhaps you can consider this -- do you want them to continue to hurt you?  I assume not.  

 

Do you have to see them again?  Is there a way to see different people instead of the people that you feel harmed you?  It would be nice if you could.

 

You are in a position of being stuck on the drug for the time being, but remember this: you do not have to think about the fact that those people did something they knew was wrong.  You owe it to yourself to try to ignore that thought, don't you?  If it makes you feel bad, think about something else.  

 

You don't have to live in that moment any longer.  It's in the past.  You could be your own best friend and tell yourself -- that thought is off limits because it makes me feel bad.  It's not useful in any way.  In fact, it hurts.  

 

Yes, it happened.  Yes, you have a right to be angry and sad.  Yes, it affected you and still does, but you do not have to relive it.  You do not have to think about it.  Having the right to feel angry and sad is very different from being required to feel angry and sad.  You can refuse to feel those feelings, and you should because they merely make you unhappy.  They don't make your life better.  Push them away, Kiki.  Refuse to let them affect you.  

 

You could think about something positive and feel better.  It will take some practice, and you will fail a few times, but it's the only way to avoid reliving that experience and feeling the feelings that thought creates over and over.  What happened simply can't be changed.  You can change what happens in your mind when thoughts of that experience surface.  Be kind to yourself and re-direct your attention elsewhere over and over until it works more often than not.  Be your own best friend any time your mind drifts to that subject.  

 

You are not at fault for what happened to you.  So, refuse to suffer for it.  Kick those thoughts out!  It's not denying what happened to do that; it's not letting those people off the hook.  It's refusing to continue to suffer for what someone else did.

[kiki2015]

On 23/03/2018 at 5:55 PM, Rosetta said:

You were there.  So, you would know better than I would.  How does it make you feel to think about that fact: that they knew what they were doing was wrong?  Does it make you feel bad?  If so, perhaps you can consider this -- do you want them to continue to hurt you?  I assume not.  

 

Do you have to see them again?  Is there a way to see different people instead of the people that you feel harmed you?  It would be nice if you could.

 

You are in a position of being stuck on the drug for the time being, but remember this: you do not have to think about the fact that those people did something they knew was wrong.  You owe it to yourself to try to ignore that thought, don't you?  If it makes you feel bad, think about something else.  

 

You don't have to live in that moment any longer.  It's in the past.  You could be your own best friend and tell yourself -- that thought is off limits because it makes me feel bad.  It's not useful in any way.  In fact, it hurts.  

 

Yes, it happened.  Yes, you have a right to be angry and sad.  Yes, it affected you and still does, but you do not have to relive it.  You do not have to think about it.  Having the right to feel angry and sad is very different from being required to feel angry and sad.  You can refuse to feel those feelings, and you should because they merely make you unhappy.  They don't make your life better.  Push them away, Kiki.  Refuse to let them affect you.  

 

You could think about something positive and feel better.  It will take some practice, and you will fail a few times, but it's the only way to avoid reliving that experience and feeling the feelings that thought creates over and over.  What happened simply can't be changed.  You can change what happens in your mind when thoughts of that experience surface.  Be kind to yourself and re-direct your attention elsewhere over and over until it works more often than not.  Be your own best friend any time your mind drifts to that subject.  

 

You are not at fault for what happened to you.  So, refuse to suffer for it.  Kick those thoughts out!  It's not denying what happened to do that; it's not letting those people off the hook.  It's refusing to continue to suffer for what someone else did.

Thank you Rosetta for your kind words. I cannot handle how I feel on this medication. I really can't. I feel like I want to jump off a cliff. 

It's just too much now. It's just too much. 

[Rosetta]

I understand.  The medicine can cause people to feel things they would not normally feel.  Remember that .  We have all been there. You will get through this.  What is your dose.  Have you made any changes or skipped any doses?

[AliG]

On 3/20/2018 at 7:15 AM, kiki2015 said:

Psychiatrists have lied to me. They told me I could come off medications but I'm still on them. Is was a complete lie.

 

Yes, it was a lie ~ and we have all been there - lied to.    You can taper off these medications, but it can take some time and a lot of patience. You will get there.

[Happy2Heal]

17 hours ago, kiki2015 said:

Thank you Rosetta for your kind words. I cannot handle how I feel on this medication. I really can't. I feel like I want to jump off a cliff. 

It's just too much now. It's just too much. 

 

I know it FEELS really bad but feelings are ALWAYS temporary. you feel bad now, but you will not always feel this way

 

as you slowly taper off the drug you will feel better and eventually you will be fine, you will be well again and have a regular normal life.

 

it helps to try to distract yourself when the feelings seem overwhelming.

take super good care of yourself, as Rosetta said so well, be a good friend to yourself.

 

Kiki, please look at my signature. I was put on antipsychotics over 40 years ago when I was just 18

I am 62 now and have been on many many drugs of all kinds, and I am almost fully recovered. I stopped my last psych med last October, it's been almost 6 mos and I continue to feel better every day

 

you will recover too, you are going to be fine, it may take awhile to get there, but you're going to get thru this

 

It can help to adopt a kind of warrior attitude, an attitude of "I'm tougher than the drug, and I'm going to beat this!!"

because you are tough and strong, much stronger than you know; we all are.

this is a tough journey, getting off these drugs but we are doing it.

 

we are coming out the other side stronger and happier and free of the chemicals and all their adverse effects.

 

hang in there, you're going to be ok. I have not read your full thread, have you had a look at the non drug coping threads? 

[kiki2015]

On 28/03/2018 at 6:15 PM, Happy2Heal said:

 

I know it FEELS really bad but feelings are ALWAYS temporary. you feel bad now, but you will not always feel this way

 

as you slowly taper off the drug you will feel better and eventually you will be fine, you will be well again and have a regular normal life.

 

it helps to try to distract yourself when the feelings seem overwhelming.

take super good care of yourself, as Rosetta said so well, be a good friend to yourself.

 

Kiki, please look at my signature. I was put on antipsychotics over 40 years ago when I was just 18

I am 62 now and have been on many many drugs of all kinds, and I am almost fully recovered. I stopped my last psych med last October, it's been almost 6 mos and I continue to feel better every day

 

you will recover too, you are going to be fine, it may take awhile to get there, but you're going to get thru this

 

It can help to adopt a kind of warrior attitude, an attitude of "I'm tougher than the drug, and I'm going to beat this!!"

because you are tough and strong, much stronger than you know; we all are.

this is a tough journey, getting off these drugs but we are doing it.

 

we are coming out the other side stronger and happier and free of the chemicals and all their adverse effects.

 

hang in there, you're going to be ok. I have not read your full thread, have you had a look at the non drug coping threads? 

I'm still on the meds..I'm taking 10mg of abilify. I am desperate for help to withdraw. I spoke to a psychiatrist over the phone, he told me to withdraw by missing doses every 2 days then every 3 days etc and then go back on 10mg then miss 4 days. Etc. But I think this is wrong advice. 

[ChessieCat]

1 minute ago, kiki2015 said:

. I spoke to a psychiatrist over the phone, he told me to withdraw by missing doses every 2 days then every 3 days etc and then go back on 10mg then miss 4 days. Etc. But I think this is wrong advice. 

 

Yes, you are correct this is very wrong advice.  Skipping Days vs Every Day Dosing Graph

 

Tips for tapering off aripiprazole (Abilify)

[Happy2Heal]

4 hours ago, kiki2015 said:

I'm still on the meds..I'm taking 10mg of abilify. I am desperate for help to withdraw. I spoke to a psychiatrist over the phone, he told me to withdraw by missing doses every 2 days then every 3 days etc and then go back on 10mg then miss 4 days. Etc. But I think this is wrong advice. 

 

of course it is wrong, did you read the link to how to taper off abilify?

http://survivingantidepressants.org/topic/1896-tips-for-tapering-off-abilify-aripiprazole/

 

 

You don't need a psychiatrist to do this, in fact, you'd be hard pressed to find one who is willing to do anything to help you get OFF a drug, they only increase doses, add more drugs or switch you back and forth on new drugs, will nilly

 

You can taper on your own using the 10% reduction (of current dose) very slowly, every four weeks or less, depending on how you are doing.

 

when you are no longer able to cut your tablets to make a smaller dose, you can see the instructions for making a liquid. For abilify, you may need a suspending solution, this can be purchased online.

 

if you want to taper off the abilify, you can do it, you don't need a dr to help you. 
VERY very few of us have had any medical help tapering, we've had to do it on our own.
We just continue to see the provider in order to get a prescription so that we can taper, and IF we are lucky, to try to convince them to give us the liquid or compounded form to make it easier

 

but we are all essentially going it on our own. If you wait for a psychiatrist to help you taper off, it will most likely NEVER happen. it's not what they do.

 

 

you can get a lot of help here in your taper if that's what you decide to do.

 

many others have gotten off of antipsychotics  and are doing fine. I've done it. It wasn't easy but I didn't have the help that you have now- with this forum and this harm reduction technique.

 

all the best to you!

 

[kiki2015]

3 hours ago, Happy2Heal said:

 

of course it is wrong, did you read the link to how to taper off abilify?

http://survivingantidepressants.org/topic/1896-tips-for-tapering-off-abilify-aripiprazole/

 

 

You don't need a psychiatrist to do this, in fact, you'd be hard pressed to find one who is willing to do anything to help you get OFF a drug, they only increase doses, add more drugs or switch you back and forth on new drugs, will nilly

 

You can taper on your own using the 10% reduction (of current dose) very slowly, every four weeks or less, depending on how you are doing.

 

when you are no longer able to cut your tablets to make a smaller dose, you can see the instructions for making a liquid. For abilify, you may need a suspending solution, this can be purchased online.

 

if you want to taper off the abilify, you can do it, you don't need a dr to help you. 
VERY very few of us have had any medical help tapering, we've had to do it on our own.
We just continue to see the provider in order to get a prescription so that we can taper, and IF we are lucky, to try to convince them to give us the liquid or compounded form to make it easier

 

but we are all essentially going it on our own. If you wait for a psychiatrist to help you taper off, it will most likely NEVER happen. it's not what they do.

 

 

you can get a lot of help here in your taper if that's what you decide to do.

 

many others have gotten off of antipsychotics  and are doing fine. I've done it. It wasn't easy but I didn't have the help that you have now- with this forum and this harm reduction technique.

 

all the best to you!

 

Bless you bless you 

[kiki2015]

22 hours ago, kiki2015 said:

Bless you bless you 

I contacted Joanna Moncrieff, she had almost no interest and denied that the medications caused so much harm despite writing a book about the harms of anti psychotics. Says a lot about her. 

[kiki2015]

On 01/04/2018 at 2:15 PM, Happy2Heal said:

 

of course it is wrong, did you read the link to how to taper off abilify?

http://survivingantidepressants.org/topic/1896-tips-for-tapering-off-abilify-aripiprazole/

 

 

You don't need a psychiatrist to do this, in fact, you'd be hard pressed to find one who is willing to do anything to help you get OFF a drug, they only increase doses, add more drugs or switch you back and forth on new drugs, will nilly

 

You can taper on your own using the 10% reduction (of current dose) very slowly, every four weeks or less, depending on how you are doing.

 

when you are no longer able to cut your tablets to make a smaller dose, you can see the instructions for making a liquid. For abilify, you may need a suspending solution, this can be purchased online.

 

if you want to taper off the abilify, you can do it, you don't need a dr to help you. 
VERY very few of us have had any medical help tapering, we've had to do it on our own.
We just continue to see the provider in order to get a prescription so that we can taper, and IF we are lucky, to try to convince them to give us the liquid or compounded form to make it easier

 

but we are all essentially going it on our own. If you wait for a psychiatrist to help you taper off, it will most likely NEVER happen. it's not what they do.

 

 

you can get a lot of help here in your taper if that's what you decide to do.

 

many others have gotten off of antipsychotics  and are doing fine. I've done it. It wasn't easy but I didn't have the help that you have now- with this forum and this harm reduction technique.

 

all the best to you!

 

The last time I came off anti psychotics, I realised I had no memory. I did repetitive things. I became frustrated because I felt alone and helpless. When my mother went to the gp she would not disclose information to her, yet mental health services made it their business to make decisions on my behalf without informing or involving my parents. I'm scared I might be one of the unlucky ones, severely and permanently damaged by anti psychotics. Where would I turn if I lost my memory and developed dementia.