Bellisimo My whole story, from hell to heaven! There IS hope. (warning: Long)

[servadei]

❤❤❤❤

[joannatm]

My goodness what an inspiration story. I'm so very happy for u. What frightens me is the distance I feel from family friends. Like I'm not here and I feel anxious fed up. I do get windows now but waves are regular. 10 months and feels like forever. I also look back at time years I've lost with my boys and feel sad. Try not to think and then just over think. I do hope I come out of it like u have. You very strong lady reading your story. Thank u so much for sharing. Xx

[AmyK]

Thank you for sharing your story! All lycka till dig!

[Bellisimo]

Thank you for sharing your story! All lycka till dig!

Tack  

[Bellisimo]

My goodness what an inspiration story. I'm so very happy for u. What frightens me is the distance I feel from family friends. Like I'm not here and I feel anxious fed up. I do get windows now but waves are regular. 10 months and feels like forever. I also look back at time years I've lost with my boys and feel sad. Try not to think and then just over think. I do hope I come out of it like u have. You very strong lady reading your story. Thank u so much for sharing. Xx

I understand that feeling. I isolate myself alot before when I were in bad shape. I couldnt meet any friends or family and i was bascially just staying indoors.. it was an awful time. I really hope you will feel better soon. 

Btw and after  I got better and better and healed more and more I could start hangout with friends/family again.

I wish you all luck 

[Hisame]

Hi !

Thanks for telling your story. It gives me hope !

Grégory.

[AmyK]

Can I just ask. Did the buzzing in your head disappear too?

I head to reread your story again. It's just amazing that you feel recovered by now after this horrible situation. You are so worth feeling good, continuing with your life.

--- A buzzing head has followed me thru the whole taper, that's why I ask. It's so annoying.

Take care!

[legan]

I started to write letters to every single person that i cared about, telling them that my time has come and i wont be here for so much longer. Then i laid down and i cried and i prepared for death.

that period was something that i didnt even existed. I went thru my life, started to regret stuff that i had done while i was "living a good life" i tried to make up by calling ppl that i loved , saying sorry , and stuff like that.

and then i waited, in my bed .. for death.

 

Congrats bellismo,

 

Thats exactly how i feel now about death .

 

What a strang world that pills can do that big change in my life .

 

I m looking for one day to also write my success story for quitting all these poisons .

 

Congrats bellismo . I hope you ll have great.life

[Bellisimo]

 

I started to write letters to every single person that i cared about, telling them that my time has come and i wont be here for so much longer. Then i laid down and i cried and i prepared for death.

that period was something that i didnt even existed. I went thru my life, started to regret stuff that i had done while i was "living a good life" i tried to make up by calling ppl that i loved , saying sorry , and stuff like that.

and then i waited, in my bed .. for death.

Congrats bellismo,

 

Thats exactly how i feel now about death .

 

What a strang world that pills can do that big change in my life .

 

I m looking for one day to also write my success story for quitting all these poisons .

 

Congrats bellismo . I hope you ll have great.life

 

I wish you all the best <3 whenever you need to talk or share some thoughts you can just PM me . 

take care

[shelbytrev]

I hope one day I can have your success. It would be so nice to just live. I tried pming you but I think maybe you haven't been on here. It's so crazy reading people's success stories because when you are in wd you can't see anything past that and everyday feels like Im just exhisting the best way I can. I hope you are still doing well. Thanks for coming back and updating. People like me (I feel obsessed with all these symptoms) need something encouraging to read.

[elbee]

Like so many others have said, THANK YOU for sharing your story. I think it's amazing that while you would probably like to just forget about the whole thing and move on, you've come back here to share your message of hope with others. Your story sounds a lot like mine (except I started sertraline and a benzo specifically for panic attacks). But I got off about two years ago and then wow, did things go bad! I got back on, but the meds don't work as well (which I have found out is common). This time I'm getting off much more slowly! It's difficult having the patience to go slowly.

[Bellisimo]

an update! 

 

For a while back I had another period of symtoms, sadly. 
Doc have now found in  my bloodtests, I have B12 deficiency, lack of D vitamin and lack of potassium.. This may be the cause of the symtoms and the b12 defienncy is prolly because of the huuuuge stress ive been thru since i stopped my ssri.

[LexAnger]

Hi Bellisimo,

 

I'm very sorry about the new hiccup!

I would think it's still not totally unexpected after such a huge shock. I must be one of the final fine tunes that your body needs to make. I believe it's short lived and self limiting. Please keep calm and just wait for it to pass quietly.

 

Wish you peace,

Lex

[NaturalBorn]

an update! 

 

For a while back I had another period of symtoms, sadly. 

Doc have now found in  my bloodtests, I have B12 deficiency, lack of D vitamin and lack of potassium.. This may be the cause of the symtoms and the b12 defienncy is prolly because of the huuuuge stress ive been thru since i stopped my ssri.

sorry for that... what symptoms did you had? were they similar to the ones from withdrawal? do you think it's a wave, or just the vitamines deficiency thing?

[servadei]

I would say this is vitamin deficieny. D and B play huge roles and I'm sure they can mimic WD symptoms. Or like Lex said, this could be the final tunes.

[joannatm]

I'm 19 mo that and still having loads waves windows. How you feeling g now Bellagio? I know you had setback hope you back on track. How long been off xx

[Itzakadoozee]

I'm so happy for you Bellisimo you are my inspiration. I am suffering greatly like you did with daily bouts of confusion and blackouts and I'm not even off the meds yet. Where you are now is where I want to be.

[joannatm]

How are you getting on dear xxx hope better. I'm having a two week wave but before that had really good days. Struggling now. Called doctor and she arranging blood tests and 24 hour urine test hormones. Fingers crossed get answers x

[joannatm]

How you feeling? Hope back to norm? I'm 20 months still getting waves windows. They testing hormones now x

[geoff22000]

Really fantastic to hear a success story!! I want to be AD free in one years time. I have had enough of medication. It hasn't helped at all over the years. I want to become myself again, at any cost. I wish I could have done this years ago as I am now 46. I know how hard it will be as tried and failed many times to come off them. But reading this gives me HOPE. Many thanks Bellisimo

[Happy2Heal]

Thanks everyone! Tonight is a night were I just lay in my bed and  feel so good. My body is so calm , my breathing is so calm, Im listen to reaxed music and I feel so calm and im thinking back of the past two and a half years and i feel so proud over myself.. And this feeling "when you can lay in your bed relaxed and enjoy" is so wonderful. In my first year in w/d I coudlnt really lay still in bed, many times as soon as I was about to relax my body wanted to run away. I wanted to sleep but my body wanted to jump out of bed.. and wake me up as soon as I fell asleep. I remember two years ago, i was thinking to myself,

" How could I take it for granted? to lay in a bed relaxed, being able to sleep.. " And I was scared that this feeling would never come back.. 

And tonight im laying here feeling blessed and so thankful that "this feeling" did come back and iam so enjoying every single second of it.

 

- Feeling good    

 

 

so very happy for you!!

this is what I am hoping for, I've been unable to sleep for 18 mos now and I am glad to see that sleep will finally return, and be as good as I remember and imagine it will be. Ah yes, how did I ever take that for granted, as well?

 

Good for you!!! thank you so much for sharing this, it gives me much hope and will help me get thru the next "how ever many" months before this happens for me.

 

regarding your low potassium, do you take magnesium? taking too much magnesium may lower your potassium, I think.

[Junglechicken]

Gives me hope too, thank you Bellissimo.......

 

As it is, these drugs claim so much time from us - its wonderful that you are happier and living and appreciating every moment.  Its like a re-birth.

[joannatm]

How are you feeling now? I'm 2 years and get lots good days and then BANG nwgative crying anxious the next day bette. Now trying primrose oil. X

[Bellisimo]

Iam now 5years free from this drug and doing just fine. I have been fine since 2016. 
Not much to mention and I cant remember last time I cried, I used to cry alot and had this intense fear of what was going on. 
Not anymore. 

 

[India]

On 4/27/2014 at 8:26 PM, Bellisimo said:

I still cannot consider myself as a fully recovery story, I have a long way to get there i belive BUT i will tell you all that for a few months ago i could never even imagine i would feel like this today.. Im much better ..

The thing that was worrying me the MOST was the bad memory i had and i forgot things all the time and had massive blackouts and was SOO confused, i can tell you that this is almost completly gone, also my feeling of loosing my half body and indentity, i havent suffer from those things in a few months now..

and THAT means so much for me that im not atleast going demental lol

 

Soon its 9 months free, i feel SO PROUD what a journey!!

Joy to my ears!!! Also, suffering memory issues.

 

So wonderful you are experiencing this. These words are like a melody to the ears!

[Kittygiggles]

17 hours ago, Bellisimo said:

Iam now 5years free from this drug and doing just fine. I have been fine since 2016. 
Not much to mention and I cant remember last time I cried, I used to cry alot and had this intense fear of what was going on. 
Not anymore. 

 

 

This is amazing and gave me so much hope: your story is so valuable and has definitely helped me. Thank you for coming back to post!

[Liamb123456]

21 hours ago, Bellisimo said:

Iam now 5years free from this drug and doing just fine. I have been fine since 2016. 
Not much to mention and I cant remember last time I cried, I used to cry alot and had this intense fear of what was going on. 
Not anymore. 

 

Congrats were youvstill bad with symptoms at 14 months out?? 

[Fighter33]

Hello, if someone can answer this I’d appreciate it. How long was Bellisimo on meds and what was the taper or was it cold turkey? I have been trying to figure this out but can’t.

[Bellisimo]

On 10/19/2018 at 3:02 PM, Fighter33 said:

Hello, if someone can answer this I’d appreciate it. How long was Bellisimo on meds and what was the taper or was it cold turkey? I have been trying to figure this out but can’t.

I was on the meds for 6 years and was tapering for about a year. I tried docs schedule a few times but i ended back on meds everytime so I told doc i will taper it very slowly and for a longer of time he said ok. It worked for me, still withdrawal hit me pretty bad but I got really sick if i was tapering too quick. 

[GirlfromD]

On 10/18/2018 at 4:03 PM, Bellisimo said:

Iam now 5years free from this drug and doing just fine. I have been fine since 2016. 
Not much to mention and I cant remember last time I cried, I used to cry alot and had this intense fear of what was going on. 
Not anymore. 

 

This is just great news  thank you for keeping us updatet.

[Hibari]

On 10/18/2018 at 10:03 AM, Bellisimo said:

Iam now 5years free from this drug and doing just fine. I have been fine since 2016. 
Not much to mention and I cant remember last time I cried, I used to cry alot and had this intense fear of what was going on. 
Not anymore. 

 

Thank you for mentioning the crying part. I am crying so much these days-sobbing at least twice a day.  

 

Even though I know its withdrawal, it was making me concerned.  It's good to know that it stopped with you.  

 

 

[JackieDecides]

On 10/18/2018 at 7:03 AM, Bellisimo said:

Iam now 5years free from this drug and doing just fine. I have been fine since 2016. 
Not much to mention and I cant remember last time I cried, I used to cry alot and had this intense fear of what was going on. 
Not anymore. 

 

I am so glad for you, Bellisimo, this is the first thread I have read through since joining this forum because I am looking for this kind of example. I stopped Lexapro last May and had much less WD than you (I was on a tiny dose) but still expecting it to be awhile til I am whatever normal turns out to look like. 

so thank you for sharing! 😍

[ChessieCat]

Hi there,

 

The staff at SA are wondering how you are.  We'd love to hear how you are doing now.   Would you mind dropping by and giving an update?

 

Thanks.

CC