Moderator brassmonkey Posted May 5, 2017 Moderator Share Posted May 5, 2017 We go through it to get back to that wonderful window you had on Tue and Wed. The days when the things we care about are there and really matter. You should make a third card that says "I felt wonderful today" at the top of it and list those dates too. I've seen on your thread that these windows are showing up more often, so they need to be at least recognized and better celebrated each time they show up. One of then lessons of WD is to recognize those things that really matter to us and cherish them, because we truly understand what it means to lose them. WD is a time of sorting and redefining as we rebuild from the chaos we have been thrown into. You have a good plan and lots of tools, now it's just a matter of letting it happen. Keep up the walks, observe the "little things" a flower, a leaf, some clouds and let the enjoyment and wonder happen for a brief moment then move on. It can work like an Emotional Spiral except in a good way. (((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))) Brass 20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013. Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks. The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better. Final Dose 0.016mg. Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017 "It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general." Stephen Hawking Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus SkyBlue Posted May 6, 2017 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted May 6, 2017 You are so very right Brass!!! Thank you. I was so very thankful for the window on Tues, Wed. I did some journaling about it but also just enjoyed the time. I was even able to be more present with people. I'd like to write more but am going to head to bed. I have a lot to be grateful for and my friendships here are definitely on that list!!! Thanks again. <<<<HUGS>>>> I love this: "Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017" 2020: After 18+ years (entire adult life) on Paxil, a dangerous doctor-led "taper" in 2015, and four years tapering off the last 1 mg thanks to SA and the Brassmonkey slide, I AM COMPLETELY FREE OF PAXIL! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Forever. 2021: Began conservative, proper, CNS-respecting taper of Zoloft, led by the only expert on me -- me. Making own liquid. 5-10% plus holds. 2022: Holding on Zoloft for now. Current dose 47 mg. Hanging in, hanging on. Severe protracted PAWS, windows and waves. While I may not be doing "a lot" by outside standards, things are graaaaadually getting better. Yoga (gentle to medium); walks; daily breath practice; nutrition, fruits/veg; nature; water; EastEnders (lol); practicing self-compassion, self-care; boundaries; connection; allowing feelings; t r u s t ing that I, too, will heal. (--> may need to be reminded of this.) "You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story." - Baylissa Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus SkyBlue Posted May 7, 2017 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted May 7, 2017 Hi everyone, an update -- I'm doing just fine now. Some thoughts in random order: 1. My experience on Friday of having suicidal thoughts and still going-through-the-motions of things that I would usually love, like a walk by the river, being outside, seeing a friend -- that was important because even though I was feeling bad at the time, now that those bad feelings have cleared, what I'm left with is the memory of a beautiful sunny day, being with a friend, walking, the beginning of my favorite time of year, etc. And honestly none of those things individually made me feel much better (the main thing that seems to clear the withdrawal-induced suicidal thoughts is time) I still feel it was important to keep putting one foot in front of the other and like I said, now I have those good memories. 2. Yesterday was a pretty great day! (Same person, same life = in other words, more evidence that the "si" (suicidal ideation) is chemical/hormonally based). 3. Today was (still is) a beautiful day. Sunny and everything is green and days like this are why you live in Minnesota and stick out the winters. 4. A "gift" of withdrawal is just enjoying the absolute amazing beauty of a normal day. I just appreciate it so much. 5. In terms of mindfulness, I think it's way easier said than done to "separate from your thoughts" and in my case, to know that the suicidal feelings aren't true -- but each time, even though they wash over me 99%, there is still a teeny bit of me there, and that's all I really need. I mean I need my SA friends' support, and the support of ppl close to me in real life, but even if only 1% of me is there and that part is very quiet, it's still there. So if you're reading this and are thinking, "So you just separate yourself from the suicidal thoughts and you're fine?" Well, not exactly. I mean, for me it is extremely challenging because it feels so real. So my intention in writing this is to let someone out there that if this feels hard and challenging for you… I get it. It is for me too. Keep fighting and I believe you will be glad you did. 6. Also, it's not, in my case, a cognitive thing. Like I don't think myself down into a place where I'm suicidal. That's not it at all. Again a clear indication that this is withdrawal-related. However it is so very strange! Hope you're all doing well. Thanks again for your support. I'm off to relax outside and enjoy this beautiful day. 2020: After 18+ years (entire adult life) on Paxil, a dangerous doctor-led "taper" in 2015, and four years tapering off the last 1 mg thanks to SA and the Brassmonkey slide, I AM COMPLETELY FREE OF PAXIL! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Forever. 2021: Began conservative, proper, CNS-respecting taper of Zoloft, led by the only expert on me -- me. Making own liquid. 5-10% plus holds. 2022: Holding on Zoloft for now. Current dose 47 mg. Hanging in, hanging on. Severe protracted PAWS, windows and waves. While I may not be doing "a lot" by outside standards, things are graaaaadually getting better. Yoga (gentle to medium); walks; daily breath practice; nutrition, fruits/veg; nature; water; EastEnders (lol); practicing self-compassion, self-care; boundaries; connection; allowing feelings; t r u s t ing that I, too, will heal. (--> may need to be reminded of this.) "You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story." - Baylissa Link to comment
Blondiee1915 Posted May 7, 2017 Share Posted May 7, 2017 Amazing update. You should be proud of yourself despite those feelings you still went out for a walk and this is what you remember. This is a true essence of a fighter. Little victories like this will make a difference. And yes separating yourself from the thought is very difficult and this is where mindfulness practice comes in. The thoughts are just thoughts and they are not who we are. Keep on going SkyBlue we are here for you I started reading a book and I highlight paragraphs that stand out to me and I want to share one on your wall if you don't mind " Always know that no matter what are you going through, at deepest level the essence of who you are still exists. Irrespective of the drug's effects that have resulted in temporary challenges, you remain that special person who entered this world as a beautiful, healthy baby" 04/10 Luvox 25 mg PM, Nortriptyline 1 mg PM 03/08/19: Buspar 2.5 mg AM, 5 mg PM 01/01/19: Xanax 0.125 AM 5 times a week. Occasionally, 0.125 twice a day AM & noon 12/18 Armour Thyroid 60 mg (for hypothyroidism) Supplements: B Complex, B12 (adeno), multi-vitamin, D, Adrenal Cortex, iron Lexapro 20 mg 2007 - 2013 with various attempts to stop 2013 found a new Dr and started trying other meds: Prozac, Notryptoline, Effexor, Buspar, Gabapentin, Paxil, Nardil Lexapro 15 mg 2015 - 04/2016 Vibryiid 10 - 15mg 05/16-06/16 NO MEDS 07/16 - 10/31/16 Reinstated 10/31/16 at 2.5 mg lexapro, increased to 5 mg 1/13/17 switched to Luvox 50 mg before bed 1/20/17 Luvox 37.5 mg PM 12/18 Luvox 10 mg PM, Nortriptyline 2 mg (started Nortriptyline 06/17 at 10 mg) Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus SkyBlue Posted May 8, 2017 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted May 8, 2017 Thanks very much Blondie!! I really appreciate it. <3 What an absolutely perfect quote to share that relates to what I was talking about. I have that book too! I'll have to take it down from my shelf and reread it. 2020: After 18+ years (entire adult life) on Paxil, a dangerous doctor-led "taper" in 2015, and four years tapering off the last 1 mg thanks to SA and the Brassmonkey slide, I AM COMPLETELY FREE OF PAXIL! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Forever. 2021: Began conservative, proper, CNS-respecting taper of Zoloft, led by the only expert on me -- me. Making own liquid. 5-10% plus holds. 2022: Holding on Zoloft for now. Current dose 47 mg. Hanging in, hanging on. Severe protracted PAWS, windows and waves. While I may not be doing "a lot" by outside standards, things are graaaaadually getting better. Yoga (gentle to medium); walks; daily breath practice; nutrition, fruits/veg; nature; water; EastEnders (lol); practicing self-compassion, self-care; boundaries; connection; allowing feelings; t r u s t ing that I, too, will heal. (--> may need to be reminded of this.) "You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story." - Baylissa Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus KarenB Posted May 9, 2017 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted May 9, 2017 So happy for you Skyblue - thanks for taking the time to share how you have been working things out. And thanks to Brass for that quotation - a vital understanding for all of us. 2010 Fluoxetine 20mg. 2011 Escitalopram 20mg. 2013 Tapered badly and destabilised CNS. Effexor 150mg. 2015 Begin using info at SurvivingAntidepressants. Cut 10% - bad w/d 2 months, held 1 month. Micro-tapering: four weekly 0.4% cuts, hold 4 weeks (struggling with symptoms). 8 month hold. 2017 Micro-tapering: four weekly 1% cuts, hold 4 weeks (symptoms almost non-existent). 2020 Still micro-tapering. Just over 2/3 of the way off effexor. Minimal symptoms, - and sleeping well. Supplements: Fish oil, vitamin C, iron, oat-straw tea, nettle tea. 2023 December - Now on 5 micro-beads Effexor. Minimal symptoms but much more time needed between drops. Symptoms begin to increase. 2024 April - Updosed to 6 microbeads - immediate increase in symptoms for 4 days. Decreased to 5 microbeads. 'The possibility of renewal exists so long as life exists.' Dr Gabor Mate. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus SkyBlue Posted May 9, 2017 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted May 9, 2017 <3 <3 Thanks so much, Karen, dear. Hope you are doing well. 2020: After 18+ years (entire adult life) on Paxil, a dangerous doctor-led "taper" in 2015, and four years tapering off the last 1 mg thanks to SA and the Brassmonkey slide, I AM COMPLETELY FREE OF PAXIL! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Forever. 2021: Began conservative, proper, CNS-respecting taper of Zoloft, led by the only expert on me -- me. Making own liquid. 5-10% plus holds. 2022: Holding on Zoloft for now. Current dose 47 mg. Hanging in, hanging on. Severe protracted PAWS, windows and waves. While I may not be doing "a lot" by outside standards, things are graaaaadually getting better. Yoga (gentle to medium); walks; daily breath practice; nutrition, fruits/veg; nature; water; EastEnders (lol); practicing self-compassion, self-care; boundaries; connection; allowing feelings; t r u s t ing that I, too, will heal. (--> may need to be reminded of this.) "You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story." - Baylissa Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus SkyBlue Posted May 9, 2017 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted May 9, 2017 My magnesium obsession continues…. I found these recently at a co-op: Dead Sea salts, similar to Epsom salts but supposed to be even better. They were amazing! I put a small amount in the tub and soaked only my feet (less commitment! lol) and wowwwwwww. I feel really really relaxed. (Here is an Amazon link but your local co-op might have them: https://www.amazon.com/Dead-Sea-Warehouse-Moisturizes-Exfoliates/dp/B005U5JPM4/ref=cm_cr_arp_d_product_top?ie=UTF8) Gotta go; almost time for Better Call Saul!!! Anyone else a fan? 2020: After 18+ years (entire adult life) on Paxil, a dangerous doctor-led "taper" in 2015, and four years tapering off the last 1 mg thanks to SA and the Brassmonkey slide, I AM COMPLETELY FREE OF PAXIL! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Forever. 2021: Began conservative, proper, CNS-respecting taper of Zoloft, led by the only expert on me -- me. Making own liquid. 5-10% plus holds. 2022: Holding on Zoloft for now. Current dose 47 mg. Hanging in, hanging on. Severe protracted PAWS, windows and waves. While I may not be doing "a lot" by outside standards, things are graaaaadually getting better. Yoga (gentle to medium); walks; daily breath practice; nutrition, fruits/veg; nature; water; EastEnders (lol); practicing self-compassion, self-care; boundaries; connection; allowing feelings; t r u s t ing that I, too, will heal. (--> may need to be reminded of this.) "You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story." - Baylissa Link to comment
Blondiee1915 Posted May 9, 2017 Share Posted May 9, 2017 Hi SkyBlue ! Oh I have to check those out . I tried taking magnesium twice and not sure if I felt any difference . To be honest I am nervous I will be even more tired on it . I do use Epsom salt for bath though . I've heard good feedback about that show I should check it out . Hope u r well 04/10 Luvox 25 mg PM, Nortriptyline 1 mg PM 03/08/19: Buspar 2.5 mg AM, 5 mg PM 01/01/19: Xanax 0.125 AM 5 times a week. Occasionally, 0.125 twice a day AM & noon 12/18 Armour Thyroid 60 mg (for hypothyroidism) Supplements: B Complex, B12 (adeno), multi-vitamin, D, Adrenal Cortex, iron Lexapro 20 mg 2007 - 2013 with various attempts to stop 2013 found a new Dr and started trying other meds: Prozac, Notryptoline, Effexor, Buspar, Gabapentin, Paxil, Nardil Lexapro 15 mg 2015 - 04/2016 Vibryiid 10 - 15mg 05/16-06/16 NO MEDS 07/16 - 10/31/16 Reinstated 10/31/16 at 2.5 mg lexapro, increased to 5 mg 1/13/17 switched to Luvox 50 mg before bed 1/20/17 Luvox 37.5 mg PM 12/18 Luvox 10 mg PM, Nortriptyline 2 mg (started Nortriptyline 06/17 at 10 mg) Link to comment
Moderator brassmonkey Posted May 9, 2017 Moderator Share Posted May 9, 2017 Since the first episode. I really love the way it's foreshadowing Breaking Bad. It will be interesting to see what happens when the timelines actually meet. 20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013. Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks. The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better. Final Dose 0.016mg. Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017 "It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general." Stephen Hawking Link to comment
AmyK Posted May 10, 2017 Share Posted May 10, 2017 A very interesting update on the 7Th of May. Well done, SkyBlue. Love, Amy Current dose: 0! Free! Quit June 2017. 2017: Last dose zoloft: 17 June 0,00065 mg 18 May 0, 001 mg 14 May 0,002 mg 9 May 0,003 mg 28 April 0,006 mg 19 April 0,009 mg 8 April 0,013 mg 25 March 0,019 mg 22 March 0,039 mg 18 March 0,052 mg 16 March 0,079 mg 4 March 0,086 1 March 0,099 mg 22 February 0,11 mg 15 February 0,13 mg 6 February 0,145 mg 24 January 0,15 mg 19 January 0,19 mg 10 January 0,20 mg 3 January 2016: 0,98 to 0,22 mg; 2015: 2,35 to 1,01 mg; 2014: 4,9 to 2,5 mg; 2013: 9,1 to 5,1 mg; 2012: 15,7 to 9,7 mg; 2011: Started on 25 mg - then 50 mg- dropped to 25- to 12.5 mg - back to 25 mg - after 18.75 mg started tiny tapering to 16.6 mg Started on 25 mg Zoloft in March 2011 due to stressrelated tinnitus that gave me panicattacks. Had a terrible reaction to Zoloft from start, but was told to "hold on". After four months I was stuck. Therefore the long taper. Crazy, I know... Super sensitive to drops and have dropped by 4-6 % from the previous dose. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus SkyBlue Posted May 12, 2017 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted May 12, 2017 Thanks so much, Amy! Blondie, Maybe give it a try but start slow? Go with your instincts. I think that magnesium deficiency (which because of the stress of WD we all most likely have) can cause fatigue. So maybe a tiny bit of magnesium and build up from there? Brass--it's such an amazing show! I couldn't watch Breaking Bad -- too violent-- so I'm glad that I gave Better Call Saul a try because it's now my favorite show that's on. I watched all of Season 1 and 2 on Netflix in like a week or two!! And I'm watching with people who know Breaking Bad, so they fill in the bits and pieces for me of who each character becomes later on. Not having watched Breaking Bad, it was somewhat lost on me when in episode 1 the con artist skateboarders rang the doorbell of none other than… Tuco Salamanca!!! Enjoy your trip! 2020: After 18+ years (entire adult life) on Paxil, a dangerous doctor-led "taper" in 2015, and four years tapering off the last 1 mg thanks to SA and the Brassmonkey slide, I AM COMPLETELY FREE OF PAXIL! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Forever. 2021: Began conservative, proper, CNS-respecting taper of Zoloft, led by the only expert on me -- me. Making own liquid. 5-10% plus holds. 2022: Holding on Zoloft for now. Current dose 47 mg. Hanging in, hanging on. Severe protracted PAWS, windows and waves. While I may not be doing "a lot" by outside standards, things are graaaaadually getting better. Yoga (gentle to medium); walks; daily breath practice; nutrition, fruits/veg; nature; water; EastEnders (lol); practicing self-compassion, self-care; boundaries; connection; allowing feelings; t r u s t ing that I, too, will heal. (--> may need to be reminded of this.) "You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story." - Baylissa Link to comment
Blondiee1915 Posted May 12, 2017 Share Posted May 12, 2017 Hi SkyBlue - I did not know that . Maybe I'll give it a try over the weekend and see what happens . If I get too tired my bed is right there . I actually took a bath last night I had some epsolm salt and got so tired after went to bed an hour later but slept the whole night so that is good . Hope you are doing good <3 have a wonderful weekend hugs ! 04/10 Luvox 25 mg PM, Nortriptyline 1 mg PM 03/08/19: Buspar 2.5 mg AM, 5 mg PM 01/01/19: Xanax 0.125 AM 5 times a week. Occasionally, 0.125 twice a day AM & noon 12/18 Armour Thyroid 60 mg (for hypothyroidism) Supplements: B Complex, B12 (adeno), multi-vitamin, D, Adrenal Cortex, iron Lexapro 20 mg 2007 - 2013 with various attempts to stop 2013 found a new Dr and started trying other meds: Prozac, Notryptoline, Effexor, Buspar, Gabapentin, Paxil, Nardil Lexapro 15 mg 2015 - 04/2016 Vibryiid 10 - 15mg 05/16-06/16 NO MEDS 07/16 - 10/31/16 Reinstated 10/31/16 at 2.5 mg lexapro, increased to 5 mg 1/13/17 switched to Luvox 50 mg before bed 1/20/17 Luvox 37.5 mg PM 12/18 Luvox 10 mg PM, Nortriptyline 2 mg (started Nortriptyline 06/17 at 10 mg) Link to comment
Cheeky Posted May 13, 2017 Share Posted May 13, 2017 Hey Sky blue, Just chimming in to say thanks for the words of encouragement. It helps a lot to have people understanding. I'm here if you every need to talk xxx 1995 started Paxil 20mg slowly increasing to 50mg 2014 I decided to tapper myself not knowing how too and crashed , DR added 50mg of Seroquel Through the years made many mistakes tapering Started Tapering Both drugs at the same time 7.5% per month Paxil 9% Seroquel doing daily micro-taper Guided by Mark Horowitz 31/3/24 Paxil 10.31mg 31/3/24 Seroquel 9.9mg Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus SkyBlue Posted May 15, 2017 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted May 15, 2017 Cheeky, you're so very welcome. My pleasure. Blondie, hope your weekend was good! I'll hop over to your thread when I get a sec. The last few days have been all over the place! Thurs: Emotionally all over the place but some windows of feeling fine! Late at night, s.i. (chemical/hormonal--nothing bad happened. Got through it.) Fri: Extremely tired (and very emotional because of that), but once I got home and was able to rest: great. just resting, clear thinking, sleepy, but good! Sat: Pretty great! Worked for a few hours. Enjoyed some time in the hammock; beautiful weather. Sleeeepy and about to go to bed at 8:30 (lol!) when a friend called--want to come over for some games? Sure. I'm glad I did. (Unfortunately suicidal rage awakening at 1 am on Saturday night/Sun morning. My mom helped me. I'm very grateful for her and my dad's support.) Sun: Morning cortisol spike didn't subside -- I was ragey (took some magnesium and did grounding and managed not to break anything or tear any clothes). Then bad nausea and headache (hormones definitely) most of the day). Grateful for my windows. Things I'm keeping in mind: - Meditating on being grateful for my windows. I've written about them in my journal (I'm big into journaling). When I get some clarity -- WOW -- it just feels so amazing. Being able to think absolutely clearly, wow. (And makes me realize how much I've been really pretty darn confused/foggy/awful not only in withdrawal but in what I now know was "poop-out" as well.) - Trying to give myself the same compassion/patience/positive self-talk I would give anyone else. If I'm having a bad day, I don't get to criticize myself, because I wouldn't criticize anyone else for having a bad day. Working on this!!!!! Hope you all are doing well. <3 2020: After 18+ years (entire adult life) on Paxil, a dangerous doctor-led "taper" in 2015, and four years tapering off the last 1 mg thanks to SA and the Brassmonkey slide, I AM COMPLETELY FREE OF PAXIL! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Forever. 2021: Began conservative, proper, CNS-respecting taper of Zoloft, led by the only expert on me -- me. Making own liquid. 5-10% plus holds. 2022: Holding on Zoloft for now. Current dose 47 mg. Hanging in, hanging on. Severe protracted PAWS, windows and waves. While I may not be doing "a lot" by outside standards, things are graaaaadually getting better. Yoga (gentle to medium); walks; daily breath practice; nutrition, fruits/veg; nature; water; EastEnders (lol); practicing self-compassion, self-care; boundaries; connection; allowing feelings; t r u s t ing that I, too, will heal. (--> may need to be reminded of this.) "You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story." - Baylissa Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus SkyBlue Posted May 15, 2017 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted May 15, 2017 Thanks to whoever (mods? Alto?) changed the title of this thread to the now more appropriate "Paxil Taper." Appreciate it! 2020: After 18+ years (entire adult life) on Paxil, a dangerous doctor-led "taper" in 2015, and four years tapering off the last 1 mg thanks to SA and the Brassmonkey slide, I AM COMPLETELY FREE OF PAXIL! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Forever. 2021: Began conservative, proper, CNS-respecting taper of Zoloft, led by the only expert on me -- me. Making own liquid. 5-10% plus holds. 2022: Holding on Zoloft for now. Current dose 47 mg. Hanging in, hanging on. Severe protracted PAWS, windows and waves. While I may not be doing "a lot" by outside standards, things are graaaaadually getting better. Yoga (gentle to medium); walks; daily breath practice; nutrition, fruits/veg; nature; water; EastEnders (lol); practicing self-compassion, self-care; boundaries; connection; allowing feelings; t r u s t ing that I, too, will heal. (--> may need to be reminded of this.) "You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story." - Baylissa Link to comment
Administrator Altostrata Posted May 16, 2017 Administrator Share Posted May 16, 2017 It was one of our wonderful mods. This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner. "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein All postings © copyrighted. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus SkyBlue Posted May 16, 2017 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted May 16, 2017 2020: After 18+ years (entire adult life) on Paxil, a dangerous doctor-led "taper" in 2015, and four years tapering off the last 1 mg thanks to SA and the Brassmonkey slide, I AM COMPLETELY FREE OF PAXIL! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Forever. 2021: Began conservative, proper, CNS-respecting taper of Zoloft, led by the only expert on me -- me. Making own liquid. 5-10% plus holds. 2022: Holding on Zoloft for now. Current dose 47 mg. Hanging in, hanging on. Severe protracted PAWS, windows and waves. While I may not be doing "a lot" by outside standards, things are graaaaadually getting better. Yoga (gentle to medium); walks; daily breath practice; nutrition, fruits/veg; nature; water; EastEnders (lol); practicing self-compassion, self-care; boundaries; connection; allowing feelings; t r u s t ing that I, too, will heal. (--> may need to be reminded of this.) "You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story." - Baylissa Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Shep Posted May 17, 2017 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted May 17, 2017 Things I'm keeping in mind: - Meditating on being grateful for my windows. I've written about them in my journal (I'm big into journaling). When I get some clarity -- WOW -- it just feels so amazing. Being able to think absolutely clearly, wow. (And makes me realize how much I've been really pretty darn confused/foggy/awful not only in withdrawal but in what I now know was "poop-out" as well.) - Trying to give myself the same compassion/patience/positive self-talk I would give anyone else. If I'm having a bad day, I don't get to criticize myself, because I wouldn't criticize anyone else for having a bad day. Working on this!!!!! Hope you all are doing well. <3 This is a great list, SkyBlue. Thanks for sharing it with us. "Trying to give myself the same compassion/patience/positive self-talk I would give anyone else" is simply brilliant. Over time, it's amazing how telling ourselves we're going to okay really helps. If we do it enough, it can even tie into those annoying looping thoughts, but instead of looping self-blame and ridicule, it can loop "I'm going to be okay" again and again until we believe it. Because it's true. Link to comment
AliG Posted May 17, 2017 Share Posted May 17, 2017 Sky. It's great that you're working on that critical voice as we all tend to have one, particularly in withdrawal. It is going to be okay and you already have one of the most important qualities, being gratitude, that helps get us through this. Many SSRI's and SSNRI's over 20 years. Zoloft for 7 years followed by Effexor, Lexapro, Prozac, Cymbalta, Celexa, Pristiq, Valdoxan, Mianserin and more - on and off. No tapering. Cold turkey off Valdoxan - end of May 2014 Psych Drug - free since May 2014 . Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus SkyBlue Posted May 18, 2017 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted May 18, 2017 I wrote at 3:35 am and it is now 4 am and I made it through another episode of suicidal rage: I think this deserves documentation, even though I am going to be so embarrassed when I wake up in the morning and realize that I posted this. I am in a suicidal rage and woke up screaming. It's very hard to see around this right now. Seriously, who wakes up in a rage wanting to leave this world? I have to see if I can calm down and if not I have to go wake up a family member to come sit with me and remind me that God hasn't forgotten me. We've done this many times and this family member has brought me through it Okay I breathed through it even though I hated every second of it. It's like Jekyl and Hyde, seriously. What a joke it is to think this will ever end. Because every cycle this always happens. I always think I'm better, yep, magnesium, calming, I feel so bad that my family has to support me through this. 2020: After 18+ years (entire adult life) on Paxil, a dangerous doctor-led "taper" in 2015, and four years tapering off the last 1 mg thanks to SA and the Brassmonkey slide, I AM COMPLETELY FREE OF PAXIL! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Forever. 2021: Began conservative, proper, CNS-respecting taper of Zoloft, led by the only expert on me -- me. Making own liquid. 5-10% plus holds. 2022: Holding on Zoloft for now. Current dose 47 mg. Hanging in, hanging on. Severe protracted PAWS, windows and waves. While I may not be doing "a lot" by outside standards, things are graaaaadually getting better. Yoga (gentle to medium); walks; daily breath practice; nutrition, fruits/veg; nature; water; EastEnders (lol); practicing self-compassion, self-care; boundaries; connection; allowing feelings; t r u s t ing that I, too, will heal. (--> may need to be reminded of this.) "You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story." - Baylissa Link to comment
AmyK Posted May 18, 2017 Share Posted May 18, 2017 Sending a warm hug. Amy Current dose: 0! Free! Quit June 2017. 2017: Last dose zoloft: 17 June 0,00065 mg 18 May 0, 001 mg 14 May 0,002 mg 9 May 0,003 mg 28 April 0,006 mg 19 April 0,009 mg 8 April 0,013 mg 25 March 0,019 mg 22 March 0,039 mg 18 March 0,052 mg 16 March 0,079 mg 4 March 0,086 1 March 0,099 mg 22 February 0,11 mg 15 February 0,13 mg 6 February 0,145 mg 24 January 0,15 mg 19 January 0,19 mg 10 January 0,20 mg 3 January 2016: 0,98 to 0,22 mg; 2015: 2,35 to 1,01 mg; 2014: 4,9 to 2,5 mg; 2013: 9,1 to 5,1 mg; 2012: 15,7 to 9,7 mg; 2011: Started on 25 mg - then 50 mg- dropped to 25- to 12.5 mg - back to 25 mg - after 18.75 mg started tiny tapering to 16.6 mg Started on 25 mg Zoloft in March 2011 due to stressrelated tinnitus that gave me panicattacks. Had a terrible reaction to Zoloft from start, but was told to "hold on". After four months I was stuck. Therefore the long taper. Crazy, I know... Super sensitive to drops and have dropped by 4-6 % from the previous dose. Link to comment
Blondiee1915 Posted May 18, 2017 Share Posted May 18, 2017 SkyBlue - you got through this and this is the most important thing . You are such an amazing soul . Do not feel bad for relying on your family members this is what they are for . They love you and want you to be well . I need to catch up on your thread (like from the beginning ) but I am wondering did you have these episodes from the beginning of being on Paxil or did it start when you withdrew or maybe when you started Zoloft ? Trying to see if there is a connection . I remember you post from few days ago when in times like this there is this tiny 1% of you that needs to push through this no matter how hard it is . Let me know how you are doing today sky . I am thinking of you 04/10 Luvox 25 mg PM, Nortriptyline 1 mg PM 03/08/19: Buspar 2.5 mg AM, 5 mg PM 01/01/19: Xanax 0.125 AM 5 times a week. Occasionally, 0.125 twice a day AM & noon 12/18 Armour Thyroid 60 mg (for hypothyroidism) Supplements: B Complex, B12 (adeno), multi-vitamin, D, Adrenal Cortex, iron Lexapro 20 mg 2007 - 2013 with various attempts to stop 2013 found a new Dr and started trying other meds: Prozac, Notryptoline, Effexor, Buspar, Gabapentin, Paxil, Nardil Lexapro 15 mg 2015 - 04/2016 Vibryiid 10 - 15mg 05/16-06/16 NO MEDS 07/16 - 10/31/16 Reinstated 10/31/16 at 2.5 mg lexapro, increased to 5 mg 1/13/17 switched to Luvox 50 mg before bed 1/20/17 Luvox 37.5 mg PM 12/18 Luvox 10 mg PM, Nortriptyline 2 mg (started Nortriptyline 06/17 at 10 mg) Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus SkyBlue Posted May 18, 2017 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted May 18, 2017 Hi friends, Today, pretty fine, thankfully. I'm so glad I could write that here and not feel embarrassed. Blondie, thanks for the kind words about relying on my family. <3 This rage-awakenings absolutely started immediately with the worst of my Paxil cold-turkey (20 mg to 10 to 5 mg; thank God I stopped at 5mg). They come with each cycle so they are hormonally related. They will stop someday. Shep, thanks for the kind words. Brilliant, I like that! <3 Ali, thanks--I really do try to be grateful. Amy, thans for the hugs! Just so thankful for all of you lovely friends. <3 <3 2020: After 18+ years (entire adult life) on Paxil, a dangerous doctor-led "taper" in 2015, and four years tapering off the last 1 mg thanks to SA and the Brassmonkey slide, I AM COMPLETELY FREE OF PAXIL! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Forever. 2021: Began conservative, proper, CNS-respecting taper of Zoloft, led by the only expert on me -- me. Making own liquid. 5-10% plus holds. 2022: Holding on Zoloft for now. Current dose 47 mg. Hanging in, hanging on. Severe protracted PAWS, windows and waves. While I may not be doing "a lot" by outside standards, things are graaaaadually getting better. Yoga (gentle to medium); walks; daily breath practice; nutrition, fruits/veg; nature; water; EastEnders (lol); practicing self-compassion, self-care; boundaries; connection; allowing feelings; t r u s t ing that I, too, will heal. (--> may need to be reminded of this.) "You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story." - Baylissa Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus SkyBlue Posted May 21, 2017 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted May 21, 2017 Hi friends, A rough few last days. Hanging in there. - a degree of confusion (not like "where am I?," but difficulty thinking) - strange sleep stuff ; nightmares; then huge cortisol rush in a.m. - extreme daytime anxiety (terror really) and not being able to think. Terror waiting behind every corner, every turn. - I think MOST of the above is due to fatigue. Yesterday when I came home I fell asleep and it got quite a bit better (from panic to anxiety). I went to a comedy show last night and experimented with something. The anxiety was gnawing at me and I was so frustrated, but didn't want to go home. So I practiced the idea of, "Okay, you know what, anxiety? You've been with me for days. You can sit next to me in this chair and say all you want, but I don't have to believe you, and we're just going to watch this show." The anxiety didn't go away, and it was difficult to separate from it, but it did give me moments of peace. It's the beginning of mindfulness in this respect. I'd like to write more about that when I'm feeling more clear. Still so sleepy today. 2020: After 18+ years (entire adult life) on Paxil, a dangerous doctor-led "taper" in 2015, and four years tapering off the last 1 mg thanks to SA and the Brassmonkey slide, I AM COMPLETELY FREE OF PAXIL! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Forever. 2021: Began conservative, proper, CNS-respecting taper of Zoloft, led by the only expert on me -- me. Making own liquid. 5-10% plus holds. 2022: Holding on Zoloft for now. Current dose 47 mg. Hanging in, hanging on. Severe protracted PAWS, windows and waves. While I may not be doing "a lot" by outside standards, things are graaaaadually getting better. Yoga (gentle to medium); walks; daily breath practice; nutrition, fruits/veg; nature; water; EastEnders (lol); practicing self-compassion, self-care; boundaries; connection; allowing feelings; t r u s t ing that I, too, will heal. (--> may need to be reminded of this.) "You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story." - Baylissa Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Shep Posted May 21, 2017 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted May 21, 2017 I went to a comedy show last night and experimented with something. The anxiety was gnawing at me and I was so frustrated, but didn't want to go home. So I practiced the idea of, "Okay, you know what, anxiety? You've been with me for days. You can sit next to me in this chair and say all you want, but I don't have to believe you, and we're just going to watch this show." The anxiety didn't go away, and it was difficult to separate from it, but it did give me moments of peace. It's the beginning of mindfulness in this respect. I can relate to this, SkyBlue. This is definitely the beginning of mindfulness and maybe even more than at the beginning because you are piecing things together and using it to cope. And that's very good. This is how mindfulness can become less of an academic exercise and more of a lifestyle. You are in training to become a guru. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus SkyBlue Posted May 22, 2017 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted May 22, 2017 Thanks so much, Shep! <3 2020: After 18+ years (entire adult life) on Paxil, a dangerous doctor-led "taper" in 2015, and four years tapering off the last 1 mg thanks to SA and the Brassmonkey slide, I AM COMPLETELY FREE OF PAXIL! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Forever. 2021: Began conservative, proper, CNS-respecting taper of Zoloft, led by the only expert on me -- me. Making own liquid. 5-10% plus holds. 2022: Holding on Zoloft for now. Current dose 47 mg. Hanging in, hanging on. Severe protracted PAWS, windows and waves. While I may not be doing "a lot" by outside standards, things are graaaaadually getting better. Yoga (gentle to medium); walks; daily breath practice; nutrition, fruits/veg; nature; water; EastEnders (lol); practicing self-compassion, self-care; boundaries; connection; allowing feelings; t r u s t ing that I, too, will heal. (--> may need to be reminded of this.) "You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story." - Baylissa Link to comment
Moderator brassmonkey Posted May 23, 2017 Moderator Share Posted May 23, 2017 Wonderful way to AAF. (((((((((HUGS)))))))))) 20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013. Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks. The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better. Final Dose 0.016mg. Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017 "It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general." Stephen Hawking Link to comment
AmyK Posted May 23, 2017 Share Posted May 23, 2017 Excellent way of handling anxiety, SkyBlue! Current dose: 0! Free! Quit June 2017. 2017: Last dose zoloft: 17 June 0,00065 mg 18 May 0, 001 mg 14 May 0,002 mg 9 May 0,003 mg 28 April 0,006 mg 19 April 0,009 mg 8 April 0,013 mg 25 March 0,019 mg 22 March 0,039 mg 18 March 0,052 mg 16 March 0,079 mg 4 March 0,086 1 March 0,099 mg 22 February 0,11 mg 15 February 0,13 mg 6 February 0,145 mg 24 January 0,15 mg 19 January 0,19 mg 10 January 0,20 mg 3 January 2016: 0,98 to 0,22 mg; 2015: 2,35 to 1,01 mg; 2014: 4,9 to 2,5 mg; 2013: 9,1 to 5,1 mg; 2012: 15,7 to 9,7 mg; 2011: Started on 25 mg - then 50 mg- dropped to 25- to 12.5 mg - back to 25 mg - after 18.75 mg started tiny tapering to 16.6 mg Started on 25 mg Zoloft in March 2011 due to stressrelated tinnitus that gave me panicattacks. Had a terrible reaction to Zoloft from start, but was told to "hold on". After four months I was stuck. Therefore the long taper. Crazy, I know... Super sensitive to drops and have dropped by 4-6 % from the previous dose. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus SkyBlue Posted May 24, 2017 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted May 24, 2017 Thanks, Brass! Hugs right back! Thank you, Amy! I appreciate it. <3 <3 <3 Feeling so grateful for this community. 2020: After 18+ years (entire adult life) on Paxil, a dangerous doctor-led "taper" in 2015, and four years tapering off the last 1 mg thanks to SA and the Brassmonkey slide, I AM COMPLETELY FREE OF PAXIL! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Forever. 2021: Began conservative, proper, CNS-respecting taper of Zoloft, led by the only expert on me -- me. Making own liquid. 5-10% plus holds. 2022: Holding on Zoloft for now. Current dose 47 mg. Hanging in, hanging on. Severe protracted PAWS, windows and waves. While I may not be doing "a lot" by outside standards, things are graaaaadually getting better. Yoga (gentle to medium); walks; daily breath practice; nutrition, fruits/veg; nature; water; EastEnders (lol); practicing self-compassion, self-care; boundaries; connection; allowing feelings; t r u s t ing that I, too, will heal. (--> may need to be reminded of this.) "You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story." - Baylissa Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus SkyBlue Posted May 26, 2017 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted May 26, 2017 Hi friends, Have been in a terror today. Why in the world that would be, not sure. It has now faded to merely high anxiety so I am going on with the evening. I also had a most unwelcome "suicidal rage awakening" last night. Will be so glad when those are over. Statements I wrote down: I don't have to feel hopeful at all times in order for there to be hope. (This I worked out with my therapist since sometimes feeling like I need to be hopeful just adds another layer of stress/pressure.) It's possible to not feel okay but still be okay. (Nothing has really changed since yesterday or since my last good days. It is just my body figuring things out.) I'm going to a get-together; the victory will be in getting there and participating; if I have to come home early that is okay. Hugs to all! 2020: After 18+ years (entire adult life) on Paxil, a dangerous doctor-led "taper" in 2015, and four years tapering off the last 1 mg thanks to SA and the Brassmonkey slide, I AM COMPLETELY FREE OF PAXIL! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Forever. 2021: Began conservative, proper, CNS-respecting taper of Zoloft, led by the only expert on me -- me. Making own liquid. 5-10% plus holds. 2022: Holding on Zoloft for now. Current dose 47 mg. Hanging in, hanging on. Severe protracted PAWS, windows and waves. While I may not be doing "a lot" by outside standards, things are graaaaadually getting better. Yoga (gentle to medium); walks; daily breath practice; nutrition, fruits/veg; nature; water; EastEnders (lol); practicing self-compassion, self-care; boundaries; connection; allowing feelings; t r u s t ing that I, too, will heal. (--> may need to be reminded of this.) "You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story." - Baylissa Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus Gridley Posted May 26, 2017 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted May 26, 2017 Good luck on your get-together. I have the same feelings about get-togethers. If you come home early, that is absolutely fine. I do it all the time. Gridley Introduction Lexapro 20 mg since 2004. Begin Brassmonkey Slide Taper Jan. 2017. End 2017 year 1 of taper at 9.25mg End 2018 year 2 of taper at 4.1mg End 2019 year 3 of taper at 1.0mg Oct. 30, 2020 Jump to zero from 0.025mg. Current dose: 0.000mg 3 year, 10 month taper is 100% complete. Ativan 1 mg to 1.875mg 1986-2020, two CT's and reinstatements Nov. 2020, 7-week Ativan-Valium crossover to 18.75mg Valium Feb. 2021, begin 10%/4 week taper of 18.75mg Valium End 2021 year 1 of Valium taper at 6mg End 2022 year 2 of Valium taper at 2.75mg End 2023 year 3 of Valium taper at 1mg Jan. 24, 2024: Hold at 1mg and shift to Imipramine taper. Taper is 95% complete. Imipramine 75 mg daily since 1986. Jan.-Sept. 2016 tapered to 14.4mg March 22, 2022: Begin 10%/4 week taper Aug. 5, 2022: hold at 9.5mg and shift to Valium taper Jan. 24, 2024: Resume Imipramine taper. Current dose as of April 1: 6.8mg Taper is 91% complete. Supplements: multiple, quercetin, omega-3, vitamins C, E and D3, magnesium glycinate, probiotics, zinc, melatonin .3mg, iron, serrapeptase, nattokinase I am not a medical professional and this is not medical advice but simply information based on my own experience, as well as other members who have survived these drugs. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus SkyBlue Posted May 27, 2017 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted May 27, 2017 Hi Gridley, thanks for stopping by and for your kind words. I did end up going, talked and socialized a bit, and came home. Glad I went but even more glad to be home! lol 2020: After 18+ years (entire adult life) on Paxil, a dangerous doctor-led "taper" in 2015, and four years tapering off the last 1 mg thanks to SA and the Brassmonkey slide, I AM COMPLETELY FREE OF PAXIL! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Forever. 2021: Began conservative, proper, CNS-respecting taper of Zoloft, led by the only expert on me -- me. Making own liquid. 5-10% plus holds. 2022: Holding on Zoloft for now. Current dose 47 mg. Hanging in, hanging on. Severe protracted PAWS, windows and waves. While I may not be doing "a lot" by outside standards, things are graaaaadually getting better. Yoga (gentle to medium); walks; daily breath practice; nutrition, fruits/veg; nature; water; EastEnders (lol); practicing self-compassion, self-care; boundaries; connection; allowing feelings; t r u s t ing that I, too, will heal. (--> may need to be reminded of this.) "You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story." - Baylissa Link to comment
AmyK Posted May 27, 2017 Share Posted May 27, 2017 Skyblue, you are doing so well working with your self in this way. It's true mindfulness and self compassion. Good for you going to that get- together...the feeling of it afterwards. Lots of Love and hugs! Current dose: 0! Free! Quit June 2017. 2017: Last dose zoloft: 17 June 0,00065 mg 18 May 0, 001 mg 14 May 0,002 mg 9 May 0,003 mg 28 April 0,006 mg 19 April 0,009 mg 8 April 0,013 mg 25 March 0,019 mg 22 March 0,039 mg 18 March 0,052 mg 16 March 0,079 mg 4 March 0,086 1 March 0,099 mg 22 February 0,11 mg 15 February 0,13 mg 6 February 0,145 mg 24 January 0,15 mg 19 January 0,19 mg 10 January 0,20 mg 3 January 2016: 0,98 to 0,22 mg; 2015: 2,35 to 1,01 mg; 2014: 4,9 to 2,5 mg; 2013: 9,1 to 5,1 mg; 2012: 15,7 to 9,7 mg; 2011: Started on 25 mg - then 50 mg- dropped to 25- to 12.5 mg - back to 25 mg - after 18.75 mg started tiny tapering to 16.6 mg Started on 25 mg Zoloft in March 2011 due to stressrelated tinnitus that gave me panicattacks. Had a terrible reaction to Zoloft from start, but was told to "hold on". After four months I was stuck. Therefore the long taper. Crazy, I know... Super sensitive to drops and have dropped by 4-6 % from the previous dose. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus SkyBlue Posted May 27, 2017 Author Moderator Emeritus Share Posted May 27, 2017 Thanks very much, Amy. <3 Love and hugs to you! 2020: After 18+ years (entire adult life) on Paxil, a dangerous doctor-led "taper" in 2015, and four years tapering off the last 1 mg thanks to SA and the Brassmonkey slide, I AM COMPLETELY FREE OF PAXIL! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Forever. 2021: Began conservative, proper, CNS-respecting taper of Zoloft, led by the only expert on me -- me. Making own liquid. 5-10% plus holds. 2022: Holding on Zoloft for now. Current dose 47 mg. Hanging in, hanging on. Severe protracted PAWS, windows and waves. While I may not be doing "a lot" by outside standards, things are graaaaadually getting better. Yoga (gentle to medium); walks; daily breath practice; nutrition, fruits/veg; nature; water; EastEnders (lol); practicing self-compassion, self-care; boundaries; connection; allowing feelings; t r u s t ing that I, too, will heal. (--> may need to be reminded of this.) "You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story." - Baylissa Link to comment
Moderator brassmonkey Posted May 28, 2017 Moderator Share Posted May 28, 2017 The important thing is that you went, stayed and came back. Well done. 20 years on Paxil starting at 20mg and working up to 40mg. Sept 2011 started 10% every 6 weeks taper (2.5% every week for 4 weeks then hold for 2 additional weeks), currently at 7.9mg. Oct 2011 CTed 15oz vodka a night, to only drinking 2 beers most nights, totally sober Feb 2013. Since I wrote this I have continued to decrease my dose by 10% every 6 weeks (2.5% every week for 4 weeks and then hold for an additional 2 weeks). I added in an extra 6 week hold when I hit 10mg to let things settle out even more. When I hit 3mgpw it became hard to split the drop into 4 parts so I switched to dropping 1mgpw (pill weight) every week for 3 weeks and then holding for another 3 weeks. The 3 + 3 schedule turned out to be too harsh so I cut back to dropping 1mgpw every 4 weeks which is working better. Final Dose 0.016mg. Current dose 0.000mg 04-15-2017 "It's also important not to become angry, no matter how difficult life is, because you can loose all hope if you can't laugh at yourself and at life in general." Stephen Hawking Link to comment
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