Hisame Posted February 9, 2016 Share Posted February 9, 2016 (edited) Hi everybody, My name is Grégory, I'm french, 35 years old. Here's my story : I started Paxil (paroxetine in France) in 2002 because of anxiety, 40 mg for 5 years, and then 20 mg for 5 another years. In 2012 I tried a withdrawal in 1 month, and I started to suffer from pain and burning sensations in my legs, and depression. One month later I reinstated Paxil 20 mg, and after some weeks, I felt better. I stayed 2 years like this. In november 2013 I retried a withdrawal, 20 mg a day, 10 mg the next day, 20 mg again the next day etc during 3 months -> then 10 mg for 3 other months -> then 10 mg/5 mg/10 mg for 3 months -> then 5 mg for 3 months -> then 5 mg/2,5 mg/5 mg for 3 months -> then 2,5 mg for 3 months. During this withdrawal (a year and a half) I had some back pain, I thought it was my discopathy that got worse, and when I was in 2,5mg for 4 months, the pain in my legs suddenly reappeared strongly, and the depression. I tried to reinstate 5 mg for a week, but a morning I had been wake by a short ring in my ears. I made an anxiety attack and I felt so bad that my family send me to a psychiatrist that sent me to a psychiatric hospital. They gave to me a lot of medication, they stopped paxil and gave to me chlomipramine, abilify, tranxene and a sleeping drug (I forgot the name) I was like a zombie. So I decided to leave one week later. I suffered from akathisia, and a lot of side effects. It was really horrible. So I stopped all the drugs and I decided to go back to paxil, 20 mg because I thought it was the best for me. Of course it was a big, big mistake. I didn't made the connection with the short ring in my ears 3 weeks ago. 1 hours after taking the only pill, a constant tinnitus appeared in my ears... So I decided immediately to stop everything, and day after day the tinnitus decreased. 3 weeks later it was completely gone, it lasted one week. After that it reappeared slowly, it was 3 months ago. Since that the tinnitus increase slowly, sometimes I can't sleep. Because of that I have a nervous breakdown. The pain in my back and my legs are a little less intense but I have no windows since I stopped Paxil. I read a lot of information about antidepressant withdrawal, a lot of testimony, in particular in your forum, the tinnitus topic, the 'reinstating and stabilizing' topic, etc..... Now please could you give me your advice ? Because I think that the pains are withdrawal symptoms and the tinnitus an adverse reaction, isn't it ? But isn't it strange that an adverse reaction goes away after a moment, then reappears and increases ? It's more like a withdrawal symptom ! I'm really lost. Thanks for your help ! Edited March 19, 2017 by scallywag tags - 2002 -> 2012 : Paxil, 20 mg for anxiety - January 2012 : 1 month withdrawal -> depression, burning sensations in my legs - February 2012 : reinstate 20 mg -> back to normal - January 2014 -> August 2015 : « alternate days » tapering from 20mg to 2,5 mg -> anxiety, back pain and trouble focusing - 4 september 2015 -> panic attack, psychiatric hospital for 1 week, stop Paxil, get Clomipramine, Abilify, Domperidone for 2 weeks, then stop everything - 20 september 2015 : try to reinstate Paxil 20 mg -> permanent tinnitus with only one tablet - Free from paxil since september 2015 ->suffering from permanent side effects : tinnitus, hyperacusis, neuropathic pain, prostatitis, depression, suicidal ideations, akathisia. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus KarenB Posted February 9, 2016 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted February 9, 2016 Bonjour Gregory and welcome to s/a, Withdrawal symptoms and adverse reactions can actually present with very similar effects. So you can get tinnitus and pains both as adverse reactions and as withdrawal symptoms. This is because they are both caused by a Central Nervous System that is out of balance (as a result of drugs). It's great you've done some reading round the site. You will have seen that withdrawal syndrome can last for months or years, and that reinstatement this far out would be less likely to work. However, depending on how bad things are for you - and it sounds like they are pretty bad - you may like to try it anyway. We've had a couple of people lately who've tried it at about 6 months after their last dose. At this stage, a small dose would be best - something around 2-5mg. What are your thoughts on that? I'm so sorry that you got to the break-down stage. Do you have a supportive family or friend there? Whichever way you decide, providing yourself with some very focused self-care is going to be paramount. Fish oil and magnesium are recommended. Plenty of rest, drink plenty of water,. Avoid stressful situations, alcohol, coffee and strenuous exercise. Your CNS does best with stability, and while you can't 'fix' the w/d, you can ease your way through it. Let us know what you think. This will be your thread to record your progress and discuss your situation. It's good to have you here Gregory. Karen 2010 Fluoxetine 20mg. 2011 Escitalopram 20mg. 2013 Tapered badly and destabilised CNS. Effexor 150mg. 2015 Begin using info at SurvivingAntidepressants. Cut 10% - bad w/d 2 months, held 1 month. Micro-tapering: four weekly 0.4% cuts, hold 4 weeks (struggling with symptoms). 8 month hold. 2017 Micro-tapering: four weekly 1% cuts, hold 4 weeks (symptoms almost non-existent). 2020 Still micro-tapering. Just over 2/3 of the way off effexor. Minimal symptoms, - and sleeping well. Supplements: Fish oil, vitamin C, iron, oat-straw tea, nettle tea. 2023 December - Now on 5 micro-beads Effexor. Minimal symptoms but much more time needed between drops. Symptoms begin to increase. 2024 April - Updosed to 6 microbeads - immediate increase in symptoms for 4 days. Decreased to 5 microbeads. 'The possibility of renewal exists so long as life exists.' Dr Gabor Mate. Link to comment
Hisame Posted February 10, 2016 Author Share Posted February 10, 2016 Hello Karen, I thank you for your welcome. Yes my family helps me, my parents and my sister, but it's also very difficult for them, and it makes me sad to see how they are worrying for me. I have to say that I'm really traumatized by all of these drugs, and particularly with Paxil. I already asked myself if I should reinstate Paxil in a very small dose, but I don't think it's a good idea because of the adverse reaction I still have. Now I'm scared of Paxil. I know that the breakdown is a consequence of tinnitus, after all the pains of withdrawal, it's just too much for me. I feel desperate because I made a lot of research and I didn't find a lot of people that fully recovered from constant tinnitus. Most of people have to bear it for many and many years. When I read that, I feel tired of living. I don't understand why this adverse effect disappeared in a first time, and then reappeared since 3 months. Maybe someone know a case of recovery from constant tinnitus ? It seems to be really rare. Thanks. - 2002 -> 2012 : Paxil, 20 mg for anxiety - January 2012 : 1 month withdrawal -> depression, burning sensations in my legs - February 2012 : reinstate 20 mg -> back to normal - January 2014 -> August 2015 : « alternate days » tapering from 20mg to 2,5 mg -> anxiety, back pain and trouble focusing - 4 september 2015 -> panic attack, psychiatric hospital for 1 week, stop Paxil, get Clomipramine, Abilify, Domperidone for 2 weeks, then stop everything - 20 september 2015 : try to reinstate Paxil 20 mg -> permanent tinnitus with only one tablet - Free from paxil since september 2015 ->suffering from permanent side effects : tinnitus, hyperacusis, neuropathic pain, prostatitis, depression, suicidal ideations, akathisia. Link to comment
Administrator Altostrata Posted February 10, 2016 Administrator Share Posted February 10, 2016 Welcome, Hisame. Please read What is withdrawal syndrome? The Windows and Waves Pattern of Stabilization It is very common for symptoms to come and go. It is possible your tinnitus will gradually disappear as your nervous system settles down. I sympathize with your disinclination to reinstate Paxil because of tinnitus. You may wish to treat your pain symptoms with acupuncture, osteopathic manual therapy, or chiropractic. This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner. "It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has surpassed our humanity." -- Albert Einstein All postings © copyrighted. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus KarenB Posted February 10, 2016 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted February 10, 2016 You feel traumatised because a trauma is exactly what you have been through. You will need time and good care to recover from this, as from any trauma. I do understand why you are choosing not to reinstate. Doesn't it make you so angry, the way this is done to people? You deserve so much better. Things will start to come right. What we find here is that people do heal, but it tends to happen slowly. You may find reassurance by learning about neuro plasticity and brain remodeling. It gave me a lot of hope when I started on this journey. My own tinnitus was never too bad to start with, but it has improved bit by bit over the last 8-9 months. Karen 2010 Fluoxetine 20mg. 2011 Escitalopram 20mg. 2013 Tapered badly and destabilised CNS. Effexor 150mg. 2015 Begin using info at SurvivingAntidepressants. Cut 10% - bad w/d 2 months, held 1 month. Micro-tapering: four weekly 0.4% cuts, hold 4 weeks (struggling with symptoms). 8 month hold. 2017 Micro-tapering: four weekly 1% cuts, hold 4 weeks (symptoms almost non-existent). 2020 Still micro-tapering. Just over 2/3 of the way off effexor. Minimal symptoms, - and sleeping well. Supplements: Fish oil, vitamin C, iron, oat-straw tea, nettle tea. 2023 December - Now on 5 micro-beads Effexor. Minimal symptoms but much more time needed between drops. Symptoms begin to increase. 2024 April - Updosed to 6 microbeads - immediate increase in symptoms for 4 days. Decreased to 5 microbeads. 'The possibility of renewal exists so long as life exists.' Dr Gabor Mate. Link to comment
Hisame Posted February 12, 2016 Author Share Posted February 12, 2016 Hi ! Thanks for the links Alto. I know the waves and windows pattern, but I don't really feel it. Except in the beginning when tinnitus disappeared, but now I have it everytime since 4 months, and it gets worse. And I have everytime pain and burning sensations, only the intensity is changing. I tried a lot of alternative medicine, osteopathic makes me feel better for a short time, but acupuncture makes me feel worse. And I like meditation but curiously after, my pains are worse. Karen, I'm sorry that you have tinnitus, is it constant ? You have it since withdrawal ? It seems to be a very common symptom. Yes of course I'm angry, but now it won't change anything, I'm rather depressed. I read a lot about neuro plasticity, for people who had cerebrovascular accident, they recover sometimes because they can relearning everything by doing exercices like children. The brain knows where to go. But how could I help my brain to hear again silence, and have no pain, after 14 years with Paxil ? Not sure that after that, the brain knows where to go.... like for amputated people who have phantom pains.... What do you think ? - 2002 -> 2012 : Paxil, 20 mg for anxiety - January 2012 : 1 month withdrawal -> depression, burning sensations in my legs - February 2012 : reinstate 20 mg -> back to normal - January 2014 -> August 2015 : « alternate days » tapering from 20mg to 2,5 mg -> anxiety, back pain and trouble focusing - 4 september 2015 -> panic attack, psychiatric hospital for 1 week, stop Paxil, get Clomipramine, Abilify, Domperidone for 2 weeks, then stop everything - 20 september 2015 : try to reinstate Paxil 20 mg -> permanent tinnitus with only one tablet - Free from paxil since september 2015 ->suffering from permanent side effects : tinnitus, hyperacusis, neuropathic pain, prostatitis, depression, suicidal ideations, akathisia. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus KarenB Posted February 12, 2016 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted February 12, 2016 Well, there are all sorts of variants and possibilities, but I seem to believe whole-heartedly that I will heal. Oddly, this is probably the most optimistic I've ever been in my life. Yes, I did have tinnitus since starting w/d, but it is much better these days - only shows up very occasionally at night now. Just keep giving yourself the best healing conditions that you can - aim for the moon! 2010 Fluoxetine 20mg. 2011 Escitalopram 20mg. 2013 Tapered badly and destabilised CNS. Effexor 150mg. 2015 Begin using info at SurvivingAntidepressants. Cut 10% - bad w/d 2 months, held 1 month. Micro-tapering: four weekly 0.4% cuts, hold 4 weeks (struggling with symptoms). 8 month hold. 2017 Micro-tapering: four weekly 1% cuts, hold 4 weeks (symptoms almost non-existent). 2020 Still micro-tapering. Just over 2/3 of the way off effexor. Minimal symptoms, - and sleeping well. Supplements: Fish oil, vitamin C, iron, oat-straw tea, nettle tea. 2023 December - Now on 5 micro-beads Effexor. Minimal symptoms but much more time needed between drops. Symptoms begin to increase. 2024 April - Updosed to 6 microbeads - immediate increase in symptoms for 4 days. Decreased to 5 microbeads. 'The possibility of renewal exists so long as life exists.' Dr Gabor Mate. Link to comment
Hisame Posted February 14, 2016 Author Share Posted February 14, 2016 Hi Karen ! Thanks for your optimism ! And in the beginning your Tinnitus was constant or also occasionnally ? - 2002 -> 2012 : Paxil, 20 mg for anxiety - January 2012 : 1 month withdrawal -> depression, burning sensations in my legs - February 2012 : reinstate 20 mg -> back to normal - January 2014 -> August 2015 : « alternate days » tapering from 20mg to 2,5 mg -> anxiety, back pain and trouble focusing - 4 september 2015 -> panic attack, psychiatric hospital for 1 week, stop Paxil, get Clomipramine, Abilify, Domperidone for 2 weeks, then stop everything - 20 september 2015 : try to reinstate Paxil 20 mg -> permanent tinnitus with only one tablet - Free from paxil since september 2015 ->suffering from permanent side effects : tinnitus, hyperacusis, neuropathic pain, prostatitis, depression, suicidal ideations, akathisia. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus KarenB Posted February 14, 2016 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted February 14, 2016 It was constant at night, but only occasionally during the day. Especially if I did too much. 2010 Fluoxetine 20mg. 2011 Escitalopram 20mg. 2013 Tapered badly and destabilised CNS. Effexor 150mg. 2015 Begin using info at SurvivingAntidepressants. Cut 10% - bad w/d 2 months, held 1 month. Micro-tapering: four weekly 0.4% cuts, hold 4 weeks (struggling with symptoms). 8 month hold. 2017 Micro-tapering: four weekly 1% cuts, hold 4 weeks (symptoms almost non-existent). 2020 Still micro-tapering. Just over 2/3 of the way off effexor. Minimal symptoms, - and sleeping well. Supplements: Fish oil, vitamin C, iron, oat-straw tea, nettle tea. 2023 December - Now on 5 micro-beads Effexor. Minimal symptoms but much more time needed between drops. Symptoms begin to increase. 2024 April - Updosed to 6 microbeads - immediate increase in symptoms for 4 days. Decreased to 5 microbeads. 'The possibility of renewal exists so long as life exists.' Dr Gabor Mate. Link to comment
Hisame Posted February 14, 2016 Author Share Posted February 14, 2016 Thanks for this detail Karen. I'm looking for stories about tinnitus healing. I hope you're fine : ) - 2002 -> 2012 : Paxil, 20 mg for anxiety - January 2012 : 1 month withdrawal -> depression, burning sensations in my legs - February 2012 : reinstate 20 mg -> back to normal - January 2014 -> August 2015 : « alternate days » tapering from 20mg to 2,5 mg -> anxiety, back pain and trouble focusing - 4 september 2015 -> panic attack, psychiatric hospital for 1 week, stop Paxil, get Clomipramine, Abilify, Domperidone for 2 weeks, then stop everything - 20 september 2015 : try to reinstate Paxil 20 mg -> permanent tinnitus with only one tablet - Free from paxil since september 2015 ->suffering from permanent side effects : tinnitus, hyperacusis, neuropathic pain, prostatitis, depression, suicidal ideations, akathisia. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus SkyBlue Posted February 16, 2016 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted February 16, 2016 Bonjour Gregory, I wanted to say welcome to the forum and, although it is difficult, to hang in there. I have been on Paxil for about 19 years, so I understand how it is to wean off of. We are all here for you!! Sarah 2020: After 18+ years (entire adult life) on Paxil, a dangerous doctor-led "taper" in 2015, and four years tapering off the last 1 mg thanks to SA and the Brassmonkey slide, I AM COMPLETELY FREE OF PAXIL! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Forever. 2021: Began conservative, proper, CNS-respecting taper of Zoloft, led by the only expert on me -- me. Making own liquid. 5-10% plus holds. 2022: Holding on Zoloft for now. Current dose 47 mg. Hanging in, hanging on. Severe protracted PAWS, windows and waves. While I may not be doing "a lot" by outside standards, things are graaaaadually getting better. Yoga (gentle to medium); walks; daily breath practice; nutrition, fruits/veg; nature; water; EastEnders (lol); practicing self-compassion, self-care; boundaries; connection; allowing feelings; t r u s t ing that I, too, will heal. (--> may need to be reminded of this.) "You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story." - Baylissa Link to comment
Hisame Posted February 16, 2016 Author Share Posted February 16, 2016 Hi Sarah ! Thanks for your post. I try to hang on, it's really hard. I have like you suicidal thoughts, every days : ( I think about my whole life and feel like I never get out of this. That damned paxil.... I read your story, so long and difficult ! You're almost free from Paxil ! I wish you the best : ) - 2002 -> 2012 : Paxil, 20 mg for anxiety - January 2012 : 1 month withdrawal -> depression, burning sensations in my legs - February 2012 : reinstate 20 mg -> back to normal - January 2014 -> August 2015 : « alternate days » tapering from 20mg to 2,5 mg -> anxiety, back pain and trouble focusing - 4 september 2015 -> panic attack, psychiatric hospital for 1 week, stop Paxil, get Clomipramine, Abilify, Domperidone for 2 weeks, then stop everything - 20 september 2015 : try to reinstate Paxil 20 mg -> permanent tinnitus with only one tablet - Free from paxil since september 2015 ->suffering from permanent side effects : tinnitus, hyperacusis, neuropathic pain, prostatitis, depression, suicidal ideations, akathisia. Link to comment
romina95 Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 Paxil withdrawal is no joke Im sorry you are going through it right now..try to hang in there Hugs 2011~ lexapro 40-60 mg (mom,why didn't you stop me I was 15..) 2013~ prozac 40mg ,seroquel 25mg (here we go poop-out and merry-go-round! 2014~ paxil 40mg, seroquel 100mg (thanks psych ward for the benzo trial and WD too) 2015~ (worst year of my life): - basically CT'd from paxil (40 to 20mg in one day,then 10 then 0 in one month total) and seroquel (cold turkey) in May, horrible withdrawals with every decrease. I said " well Imma ride this out", yeah right.. Two weeks off I couldn't take it anymore. - Drs. Lab rat( they tried prozac,lexapro,also for a few days cymbalta,venlafaxine,and for anxiety olanzapine and different doses seroquel) - started wellbutrin (which "cured" my by then 1/2 year withdrawal in a few days,what?) 2016~zoloft 100mg,wellbutrin 300mg,seroquel 50mg I hope to be med-free one day,I started at such a young age so, Who am I? No idea. Link to comment
Hisame Posted February 18, 2016 Author Share Posted February 18, 2016 Hi Romina, Thanks for your support : ) It's sad to see that a young girl like you took meds since the age of 15 : ( It should not exist. One day you will be free ! Courage ! - 2002 -> 2012 : Paxil, 20 mg for anxiety - January 2012 : 1 month withdrawal -> depression, burning sensations in my legs - February 2012 : reinstate 20 mg -> back to normal - January 2014 -> August 2015 : « alternate days » tapering from 20mg to 2,5 mg -> anxiety, back pain and trouble focusing - 4 september 2015 -> panic attack, psychiatric hospital for 1 week, stop Paxil, get Clomipramine, Abilify, Domperidone for 2 weeks, then stop everything - 20 september 2015 : try to reinstate Paxil 20 mg -> permanent tinnitus with only one tablet - Free from paxil since september 2015 ->suffering from permanent side effects : tinnitus, hyperacusis, neuropathic pain, prostatitis, depression, suicidal ideations, akathisia. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus SkyBlue Posted February 18, 2016 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted February 18, 2016 Hi Sarah ! Thanks for your post. I try to hang on, it's really hard. I have like you suicidal thoughts, every days : ( I think about my whole life and feel like I never get out of this. That damned paxil.... I read your story, so long and difficult ! You're almost free from Paxil ! I wish you the best : ) @Hisame, you are very welcome. Thank you for your kind words!!! Merci. Hisame, do you have resources, support for the suicidal thoughts? In other words, while it is extremely uncomfortable, you are safe? I am confident that you definitely will get out of this. But yes, that damned paxil!!!!!!! Hugs and keep in touch. 2020: After 18+ years (entire adult life) on Paxil, a dangerous doctor-led "taper" in 2015, and four years tapering off the last 1 mg thanks to SA and the Brassmonkey slide, I AM COMPLETELY FREE OF PAXIL! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Forever. 2021: Began conservative, proper, CNS-respecting taper of Zoloft, led by the only expert on me -- me. Making own liquid. 5-10% plus holds. 2022: Holding on Zoloft for now. Current dose 47 mg. Hanging in, hanging on. Severe protracted PAWS, windows and waves. While I may not be doing "a lot" by outside standards, things are graaaaadually getting better. Yoga (gentle to medium); walks; daily breath practice; nutrition, fruits/veg; nature; water; EastEnders (lol); practicing self-compassion, self-care; boundaries; connection; allowing feelings; t r u s t ing that I, too, will heal. (--> may need to be reminded of this.) "You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story." - Baylissa Link to comment
Hisame Posted February 20, 2016 Author Share Posted February 20, 2016 Thanks Sarah for your encouragement. My family supports me, my parents and my sister. It's hard for them too : ( Hugs. - 2002 -> 2012 : Paxil, 20 mg for anxiety - January 2012 : 1 month withdrawal -> depression, burning sensations in my legs - February 2012 : reinstate 20 mg -> back to normal - January 2014 -> August 2015 : « alternate days » tapering from 20mg to 2,5 mg -> anxiety, back pain and trouble focusing - 4 september 2015 -> panic attack, psychiatric hospital for 1 week, stop Paxil, get Clomipramine, Abilify, Domperidone for 2 weeks, then stop everything - 20 september 2015 : try to reinstate Paxil 20 mg -> permanent tinnitus with only one tablet - Free from paxil since september 2015 ->suffering from permanent side effects : tinnitus, hyperacusis, neuropathic pain, prostatitis, depression, suicidal ideations, akathisia. Link to comment
Hisame Posted February 20, 2016 Author Share Posted February 20, 2016 One question please, how can you use emoticons in your message. I see no option when I'm writing ? - 2002 -> 2012 : Paxil, 20 mg for anxiety - January 2012 : 1 month withdrawal -> depression, burning sensations in my legs - February 2012 : reinstate 20 mg -> back to normal - January 2014 -> August 2015 : « alternate days » tapering from 20mg to 2,5 mg -> anxiety, back pain and trouble focusing - 4 september 2015 -> panic attack, psychiatric hospital for 1 week, stop Paxil, get Clomipramine, Abilify, Domperidone for 2 weeks, then stop everything - 20 september 2015 : try to reinstate Paxil 20 mg -> permanent tinnitus with only one tablet - Free from paxil since september 2015 ->suffering from permanent side effects : tinnitus, hyperacusis, neuropathic pain, prostatitis, depression, suicidal ideations, akathisia. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus SkyBlue Posted February 23, 2016 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted February 23, 2016 oh, yes! On my computer, it is right above the text box. There is a happy face icon. It also seems to work if you do : ) (but spaced closer together). 2020: After 18+ years (entire adult life) on Paxil, a dangerous doctor-led "taper" in 2015, and four years tapering off the last 1 mg thanks to SA and the Brassmonkey slide, I AM COMPLETELY FREE OF PAXIL! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Forever. 2021: Began conservative, proper, CNS-respecting taper of Zoloft, led by the only expert on me -- me. Making own liquid. 5-10% plus holds. 2022: Holding on Zoloft for now. Current dose 47 mg. Hanging in, hanging on. Severe protracted PAWS, windows and waves. While I may not be doing "a lot" by outside standards, things are graaaaadually getting better. Yoga (gentle to medium); walks; daily breath practice; nutrition, fruits/veg; nature; water; EastEnders (lol); practicing self-compassion, self-care; boundaries; connection; allowing feelings; t r u s t ing that I, too, will heal. (--> may need to be reminded of this.) "You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story." - Baylissa Link to comment
Hisame Posted February 27, 2016 Author Share Posted February 27, 2016 Thanks Sarah. I don't see any emoticon, that's strange, maybe my ipad. I will try with my computer........ - 2002 -> 2012 : Paxil, 20 mg for anxiety - January 2012 : 1 month withdrawal -> depression, burning sensations in my legs - February 2012 : reinstate 20 mg -> back to normal - January 2014 -> August 2015 : « alternate days » tapering from 20mg to 2,5 mg -> anxiety, back pain and trouble focusing - 4 september 2015 -> panic attack, psychiatric hospital for 1 week, stop Paxil, get Clomipramine, Abilify, Domperidone for 2 weeks, then stop everything - 20 september 2015 : try to reinstate Paxil 20 mg -> permanent tinnitus with only one tablet - Free from paxil since september 2015 ->suffering from permanent side effects : tinnitus, hyperacusis, neuropathic pain, prostatitis, depression, suicidal ideations, akathisia. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus SkyBlue Posted February 27, 2016 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted February 27, 2016 You're welcome! I think the site is different on iPad vs. computer. How are you doing? 2020: After 18+ years (entire adult life) on Paxil, a dangerous doctor-led "taper" in 2015, and four years tapering off the last 1 mg thanks to SA and the Brassmonkey slide, I AM COMPLETELY FREE OF PAXIL! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Forever. 2021: Began conservative, proper, CNS-respecting taper of Zoloft, led by the only expert on me -- me. Making own liquid. 5-10% plus holds. 2022: Holding on Zoloft for now. Current dose 47 mg. Hanging in, hanging on. Severe protracted PAWS, windows and waves. While I may not be doing "a lot" by outside standards, things are graaaaadually getting better. Yoga (gentle to medium); walks; daily breath practice; nutrition, fruits/veg; nature; water; EastEnders (lol); practicing self-compassion, self-care; boundaries; connection; allowing feelings; t r u s t ing that I, too, will heal. (--> may need to be reminded of this.) "You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story." - Baylissa Link to comment
Hisame Posted February 28, 2016 Author Share Posted February 28, 2016 Hi Sarah, Thanks for asking me how I'm doing. I hope you're ok : ) Unfortunately I'm still feeling bad. Tinnitus has slightly increased month after month, like pains throughout my body. I have no windows since 4 months. I can manage the pains because I live with it since a long time, but the ring in my ears, it's too much, it turns off all of my positive thoughts, it wear me out. I'm crying often, I'm anxious to go to bed because it's worse at night. I'm a depressed and very anxious person since my childhood, it has always been difficult for me to live and this is why I finally fall in meds. Now things gets more and more difficult, and because of that I feel like I will never be happy in my life : ( - 2002 -> 2012 : Paxil, 20 mg for anxiety - January 2012 : 1 month withdrawal -> depression, burning sensations in my legs - February 2012 : reinstate 20 mg -> back to normal - January 2014 -> August 2015 : « alternate days » tapering from 20mg to 2,5 mg -> anxiety, back pain and trouble focusing - 4 september 2015 -> panic attack, psychiatric hospital for 1 week, stop Paxil, get Clomipramine, Abilify, Domperidone for 2 weeks, then stop everything - 20 september 2015 : try to reinstate Paxil 20 mg -> permanent tinnitus with only one tablet - Free from paxil since september 2015 ->suffering from permanent side effects : tinnitus, hyperacusis, neuropathic pain, prostatitis, depression, suicidal ideations, akathisia. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus SkyBlue Posted February 29, 2016 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted February 29, 2016 Hi Hisame, I'm sorry -- I didn't see this yesterday. The tinnitus sounds very bad. Please have hope. I know that must sound silly, but -- there are so many people on this site who have gotten better, even though it has taken a while. It takes a very strong person not to get overwhelmed by this. Hang in there, Hisame. 2020: After 18+ years (entire adult life) on Paxil, a dangerous doctor-led "taper" in 2015, and four years tapering off the last 1 mg thanks to SA and the Brassmonkey slide, I AM COMPLETELY FREE OF PAXIL! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Forever. 2021: Began conservative, proper, CNS-respecting taper of Zoloft, led by the only expert on me -- me. Making own liquid. 5-10% plus holds. 2022: Holding on Zoloft for now. Current dose 47 mg. Hanging in, hanging on. Severe protracted PAWS, windows and waves. While I may not be doing "a lot" by outside standards, things are graaaaadually getting better. Yoga (gentle to medium); walks; daily breath practice; nutrition, fruits/veg; nature; water; EastEnders (lol); practicing self-compassion, self-care; boundaries; connection; allowing feelings; t r u s t ing that I, too, will heal. (--> may need to be reminded of this.) "You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story." - Baylissa Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus SkyBlue Posted March 9, 2016 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted March 9, 2016 How are you doing, Hisame? 2020: After 18+ years (entire adult life) on Paxil, a dangerous doctor-led "taper" in 2015, and four years tapering off the last 1 mg thanks to SA and the Brassmonkey slide, I AM COMPLETELY FREE OF PAXIL! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Forever. 2021: Began conservative, proper, CNS-respecting taper of Zoloft, led by the only expert on me -- me. Making own liquid. 5-10% plus holds. 2022: Holding on Zoloft for now. Current dose 47 mg. Hanging in, hanging on. Severe protracted PAWS, windows and waves. While I may not be doing "a lot" by outside standards, things are graaaaadually getting better. Yoga (gentle to medium); walks; daily breath practice; nutrition, fruits/veg; nature; water; EastEnders (lol); practicing self-compassion, self-care; boundaries; connection; allowing feelings; t r u s t ing that I, too, will heal. (--> may need to be reminded of this.) "You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story." - Baylissa Link to comment
Hisame Posted March 12, 2016 Author Share Posted March 12, 2016 Hi Sarah, You're very sweet for asking. It's sad but I feel desperate. Almost 6 months after paxil and it's like things has got worse. I really have no motivation for posting : ( Sorry. I hope You're going fine. Grégory. - 2002 -> 2012 : Paxil, 20 mg for anxiety - January 2012 : 1 month withdrawal -> depression, burning sensations in my legs - February 2012 : reinstate 20 mg -> back to normal - January 2014 -> August 2015 : « alternate days » tapering from 20mg to 2,5 mg -> anxiety, back pain and trouble focusing - 4 september 2015 -> panic attack, psychiatric hospital for 1 week, stop Paxil, get Clomipramine, Abilify, Domperidone for 2 weeks, then stop everything - 20 september 2015 : try to reinstate Paxil 20 mg -> permanent tinnitus with only one tablet - Free from paxil since september 2015 ->suffering from permanent side effects : tinnitus, hyperacusis, neuropathic pain, prostatitis, depression, suicidal ideations, akathisia. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus KarenB Posted March 12, 2016 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted March 12, 2016 Hi Hisame, so sorry things are worse. For some people - most unfairly - w/d does take longer to end. There are other members here who are also waiting a long time. Are there supportive people in your life, or things that you are doing to get yourself through this difficult time? For you will heal - managing until then is the tricky part. I hope that you have some hope and belief that you will heal. Non-Drug Techniques to cope with emotional symptoms. Hugs, Karen 2010 Fluoxetine 20mg. 2011 Escitalopram 20mg. 2013 Tapered badly and destabilised CNS. Effexor 150mg. 2015 Begin using info at SurvivingAntidepressants. Cut 10% - bad w/d 2 months, held 1 month. Micro-tapering: four weekly 0.4% cuts, hold 4 weeks (struggling with symptoms). 8 month hold. 2017 Micro-tapering: four weekly 1% cuts, hold 4 weeks (symptoms almost non-existent). 2020 Still micro-tapering. Just over 2/3 of the way off effexor. Minimal symptoms, - and sleeping well. Supplements: Fish oil, vitamin C, iron, oat-straw tea, nettle tea. 2023 December - Now on 5 micro-beads Effexor. Minimal symptoms but much more time needed between drops. Symptoms begin to increase. 2024 April - Updosed to 6 microbeads - immediate increase in symptoms for 4 days. Decreased to 5 microbeads. 'The possibility of renewal exists so long as life exists.' Dr Gabor Mate. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus SkyBlue Posted March 14, 2016 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted March 14, 2016 Hi Grégory, Please hang in there… You will look back at this and be amazed at how strong you are to survive it. Hugs!!! 2020: After 18+ years (entire adult life) on Paxil, a dangerous doctor-led "taper" in 2015, and four years tapering off the last 1 mg thanks to SA and the Brassmonkey slide, I AM COMPLETELY FREE OF PAXIL! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Forever. 2021: Began conservative, proper, CNS-respecting taper of Zoloft, led by the only expert on me -- me. Making own liquid. 5-10% plus holds. 2022: Holding on Zoloft for now. Current dose 47 mg. Hanging in, hanging on. Severe protracted PAWS, windows and waves. While I may not be doing "a lot" by outside standards, things are graaaaadually getting better. Yoga (gentle to medium); walks; daily breath practice; nutrition, fruits/veg; nature; water; EastEnders (lol); practicing self-compassion, self-care; boundaries; connection; allowing feelings; t r u s t ing that I, too, will heal. (--> may need to be reminded of this.) "You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story." - Baylissa Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus SkyBlue Posted April 28, 2016 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted April 28, 2016 Hisame, are you still around? I sent you a message also. Just want to make sure you are still with us. I hope you are ok. 2020: After 18+ years (entire adult life) on Paxil, a dangerous doctor-led "taper" in 2015, and four years tapering off the last 1 mg thanks to SA and the Brassmonkey slide, I AM COMPLETELY FREE OF PAXIL! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Forever. 2021: Began conservative, proper, CNS-respecting taper of Zoloft, led by the only expert on me -- me. Making own liquid. 5-10% plus holds. 2022: Holding on Zoloft for now. Current dose 47 mg. Hanging in, hanging on. Severe protracted PAWS, windows and waves. While I may not be doing "a lot" by outside standards, things are graaaaadually getting better. Yoga (gentle to medium); walks; daily breath practice; nutrition, fruits/veg; nature; water; EastEnders (lol); practicing self-compassion, self-care; boundaries; connection; allowing feelings; t r u s t ing that I, too, will heal. (--> may need to be reminded of this.) "You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story." - Baylissa Link to comment
Hisame Posted April 28, 2016 Author Share Posted April 28, 2016 Hi Sarah, I answered your message. Thanks ! - 2002 -> 2012 : Paxil, 20 mg for anxiety - January 2012 : 1 month withdrawal -> depression, burning sensations in my legs - February 2012 : reinstate 20 mg -> back to normal - January 2014 -> August 2015 : « alternate days » tapering from 20mg to 2,5 mg -> anxiety, back pain and trouble focusing - 4 september 2015 -> panic attack, psychiatric hospital for 1 week, stop Paxil, get Clomipramine, Abilify, Domperidone for 2 weeks, then stop everything - 20 september 2015 : try to reinstate Paxil 20 mg -> permanent tinnitus with only one tablet - Free from paxil since september 2015 ->suffering from permanent side effects : tinnitus, hyperacusis, neuropathic pain, prostatitis, depression, suicidal ideations, akathisia. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus SkyBlue Posted April 30, 2016 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted April 30, 2016 2020: After 18+ years (entire adult life) on Paxil, a dangerous doctor-led "taper" in 2015, and four years tapering off the last 1 mg thanks to SA and the Brassmonkey slide, I AM COMPLETELY FREE OF PAXIL! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Forever. 2021: Began conservative, proper, CNS-respecting taper of Zoloft, led by the only expert on me -- me. Making own liquid. 5-10% plus holds. 2022: Holding on Zoloft for now. Current dose 47 mg. Hanging in, hanging on. Severe protracted PAWS, windows and waves. While I may not be doing "a lot" by outside standards, things are graaaaadually getting better. Yoga (gentle to medium); walks; daily breath practice; nutrition, fruits/veg; nature; water; EastEnders (lol); practicing self-compassion, self-care; boundaries; connection; allowing feelings; t r u s t ing that I, too, will heal. (--> may need to be reminded of this.) "You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story." - Baylissa Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus SkyBlue Posted March 17, 2017 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted March 17, 2017 Hisame, are you still around? Are you okay? 2020: After 18+ years (entire adult life) on Paxil, a dangerous doctor-led "taper" in 2015, and four years tapering off the last 1 mg thanks to SA and the Brassmonkey slide, I AM COMPLETELY FREE OF PAXIL! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! Forever. 2021: Began conservative, proper, CNS-respecting taper of Zoloft, led by the only expert on me -- me. Making own liquid. 5-10% plus holds. 2022: Holding on Zoloft for now. Current dose 47 mg. Hanging in, hanging on. Severe protracted PAWS, windows and waves. While I may not be doing "a lot" by outside standards, things are graaaaadually getting better. Yoga (gentle to medium); walks; daily breath practice; nutrition, fruits/veg; nature; water; EastEnders (lol); practicing self-compassion, self-care; boundaries; connection; allowing feelings; t r u s t ing that I, too, will heal. (--> may need to be reminded of this.) "You are not alone, and this is not the end of your story." - Baylissa Link to comment
Hisame Posted March 18, 2017 Author Share Posted March 18, 2017 Hi Sarah, I send you a pm. - 2002 -> 2012 : Paxil, 20 mg for anxiety - January 2012 : 1 month withdrawal -> depression, burning sensations in my legs - February 2012 : reinstate 20 mg -> back to normal - January 2014 -> August 2015 : « alternate days » tapering from 20mg to 2,5 mg -> anxiety, back pain and trouble focusing - 4 september 2015 -> panic attack, psychiatric hospital for 1 week, stop Paxil, get Clomipramine, Abilify, Domperidone for 2 weeks, then stop everything - 20 september 2015 : try to reinstate Paxil 20 mg -> permanent tinnitus with only one tablet - Free from paxil since september 2015 ->suffering from permanent side effects : tinnitus, hyperacusis, neuropathic pain, prostatitis, depression, suicidal ideations, akathisia. Link to comment
Hisame Posted August 29, 2019 Author Share Posted August 29, 2019 (edited) Hi ! It has been a long time since I came here to make an update. I'm in a withdrawal syndrome for four years. No really improvement, symptoms have been added slowly, one after another. I became extremely sensitive to noises, that gives me a lot of stress, and that turned into akathisia. And I got sick in early 2018, this turned into chronic nausea and prostatitis that caused me a lot of pain. This year, akathisia fall asleep and neuropathic pain was a little better. But, this august, I had to go to the dentist for a broken filling. He made a local injection and since that, I'm in hell. (I called few days later to have the name of the product : Septanest -> articaïne and adrenaline) This has increased my neuropathic pain that are located in my cheeks when I sit. Now, It's in addition in all my back, and my arms and feets are numb when I lie down. The pain has highly increased. It's been two weeks and it has worsened. I can't relax when I sit, I can't sleep more than two hours. I'm afraid that this will last for so long. I'm really really bad, so much that I think about reinstatement or another drugs, just in order to give me the last chance. I read Ashton, Shipko, the reinstatement topic, I know it's really risky. But I'm desperate. I have wait 4 years, I have made considerable efforts to cope with suffering, and to end up like that just for a visit to the dentist, It's horribly discouraging. Sorry for that sad testimony. Feel free to give me your advice. Thanks. Edited August 30, 2019 by ChessieCat reworded obscenity - 2002 -> 2012 : Paxil, 20 mg for anxiety - January 2012 : 1 month withdrawal -> depression, burning sensations in my legs - February 2012 : reinstate 20 mg -> back to normal - January 2014 -> August 2015 : « alternate days » tapering from 20mg to 2,5 mg -> anxiety, back pain and trouble focusing - 4 september 2015 -> panic attack, psychiatric hospital for 1 week, stop Paxil, get Clomipramine, Abilify, Domperidone for 2 weeks, then stop everything - 20 september 2015 : try to reinstate Paxil 20 mg -> permanent tinnitus with only one tablet - Free from paxil since september 2015 ->suffering from permanent side effects : tinnitus, hyperacusis, neuropathic pain, prostatitis, depression, suicidal ideations, akathisia. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus ChessieCat Posted August 30, 2019 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted August 30, 2019 Seems like you are still in WD from all the changes you made several years ago and you are in a very sensitive state so any medication could trip things off. You should give the injection a month of so to stabilize and wear off. Adding anything new would just stir the pot. * NO LONGER ACTIVE on SA * MISSION ACCOMPLISHED: (6 year taper) 0mg Pristiq on 13th November 2021 ADs since ~1992: 25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq: 50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity) Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021 LAST DOSE 0.0025mg Post 0 updates start here My tapering program My Intro (goes to tapering graph) VIDEO: Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome and its Management Link to comment
Hisame Posted August 30, 2019 Author Share Posted August 30, 2019 Thanks ChessieCat, I know all of that, the voice of reason. This is why I didn't touch anything since 4 years. It's just.... I'm tired. As you suggest I will wait a month and see if it moves. And I'm sure it will move, but to where ? When I see the evolution since these 4 years... - 2002 -> 2012 : Paxil, 20 mg for anxiety - January 2012 : 1 month withdrawal -> depression, burning sensations in my legs - February 2012 : reinstate 20 mg -> back to normal - January 2014 -> August 2015 : « alternate days » tapering from 20mg to 2,5 mg -> anxiety, back pain and trouble focusing - 4 september 2015 -> panic attack, psychiatric hospital for 1 week, stop Paxil, get Clomipramine, Abilify, Domperidone for 2 weeks, then stop everything - 20 september 2015 : try to reinstate Paxil 20 mg -> permanent tinnitus with only one tablet - Free from paxil since september 2015 ->suffering from permanent side effects : tinnitus, hyperacusis, neuropathic pain, prostatitis, depression, suicidal ideations, akathisia. Link to comment
Moderator Emeritus ChessieCat Posted August 30, 2019 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted August 30, 2019 That was actually BrassMonkey's voice of reason so I don't want to take the credit for it. 😉 BrassMonkey wrote these in 2018 so you probably haven't seen them: are-we-there-yet-how-long-is-withdrawal-going-to-take We can get battle weary. When we aren't well it seems like forever. As Alto often says it is going to take time, much longer than you want it to and can be very frustrating. Are you doing any non drug calming techniques to soothe your nervous system? I suggest that you set a reminder for several times throughout the day and do some relaxation and/or breathing exercises. It's also important to learn to accept that it is what it is at this time. Learning to accept can help reduce the stress we create in our body. Acceptance If in the future you do decide to take something, please be sure to start with a small dose to see how it affects you. * NO LONGER ACTIVE on SA * MISSION ACCOMPLISHED: (6 year taper) 0mg Pristiq on 13th November 2021 ADs since ~1992: 25+ years - 1 unknown, Prozac (muscle weakness), Zoloft; citalopram (pooped out) CTed (very sick for 2.5 wks a few months after); Pristiq: 50mg 2012, 100mg beg 2013 (Serotonin Toxicity) Tapering from Oct 2015 - 13 Nov 2021 LAST DOSE 0.0025mg Post 0 updates start here My tapering program My Intro (goes to tapering graph) VIDEO: Antidepressant Withdrawal Syndrome and its Management Link to comment
Hisame Posted August 31, 2019 Author Share Posted August 31, 2019 Thanks ChessieCat, you’re very sweet. 3 hours ago, ChessieCat said: BrassMonkey wrote these in 2018 so you probably haven't seen them: are-we-there-yet-how-long-is-withdrawal-going-to-take Wow I didn’t read Brassmonkey, he could write a book 😉 3 hours ago, ChessieCat said: We can get battle weary. When we aren't well it seems like forever. As Alto often says it is going to take time, much longer than you want it to and can be very frustrating.. This is so true. I realized this a lot of time. It’s more easy when symptoms lasts only several days, and then is replaced by others, like a rubik’s cube. I’m living it everydays with all the symptoms that affect me. Tinnitus was the only continuous symptom. What scares me is that’s a sort of « neurotoxic adverse reaction » this time , this is more serious 😔 3 hours ago, ChessieCat said: Are you doing any non drug calming techniques to soothe your nervous system? I suggest that you set a reminder for several times throughout the day and do some relaxation and/or breathing exercises. I walk in nature. 3 hours ago, ChessieCat said: If in the future you do decide to take something, please be sure to start with a small dose to see how it affects you. If pain remains unbearable and last for too long, I think I will have no choice. I only read one successfully reinstatement after a long time off the drug, that’s Mappleleafgirl, and she doesn’t post anymore 😥 Thanks again. - 2002 -> 2012 : Paxil, 20 mg for anxiety - January 2012 : 1 month withdrawal -> depression, burning sensations in my legs - February 2012 : reinstate 20 mg -> back to normal - January 2014 -> August 2015 : « alternate days » tapering from 20mg to 2,5 mg -> anxiety, back pain and trouble focusing - 4 september 2015 -> panic attack, psychiatric hospital for 1 week, stop Paxil, get Clomipramine, Abilify, Domperidone for 2 weeks, then stop everything - 20 september 2015 : try to reinstate Paxil 20 mg -> permanent tinnitus with only one tablet - Free from paxil since september 2015 ->suffering from permanent side effects : tinnitus, hyperacusis, neuropathic pain, prostatitis, depression, suicidal ideations, akathisia. Link to comment
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