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Hisame: withdrawal syndrome from Paxil

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Hisame

Hi everybody,

 

My name is Grégory, I'm french, 35 years old. Here's my story :

 

I started Paxil (paroxetine in France) in 2002 because of anxiety, 40 mg for 5 years, and then 20 mg for 5 another years. In 2012 I tried a withdrawal in 1 month, and I started to suffer from pain and burning sensations in my legs, and depression.

One month later I reinstated Paxil 20 mg, and after some weeks, I felt better. I stayed 2 years like this.

 

In november 2013 I retried a withdrawal, 20 mg a day, 10 mg the next day, 20 mg again the next day etc during 3 months -> then 10 mg for 3 other months -> then 10 mg/5 mg/10 mg for 3 months -> then 5 mg for 3 months -> then 5 mg/2,5 mg/5 mg for 3 months -> then 2,5 mg for 3 months.

 

During this withdrawal (a year and a half) I had some back pain, I thought it was my discopathy that got worse, and when I was in 2,5mg for 4 months, the pain in my legs suddenly reappeared strongly, and the depression. I tried to reinstate 5 mg for a week, but a morning I had been wake by a short ring in my ears. I made an anxiety attack and I felt so bad that my family send me to a psychiatrist that sent me to a psychiatric hospital.

 

They gave to me a lot of medication, they stopped paxil and gave to me chlomipramine, abilify, tranxene and a sleeping drug (I forgot the name) I was like a zombie. So I decided to leave one week later. I suffered from akathisia, and a lot of side effects. It was really horrible. So I stopped all the drugs and I decided to go back to paxil, 20 mg because I thought it was the best for me.

Of course it was a big, big mistake. I didn't made the connection with the short ring in my ears 3 weeks ago. 1 hours after taking the only pill, a constant tinnitus appeared in my ears...

 

So I decided immediately to stop everything, and day after day the tinnitus decreased. 3 weeks later it was completely gone, it lasted one week.

After that it reappeared slowly, it was 3 months ago.

 

Since that the tinnitus increase slowly, sometimes I can't sleep. Because of that I have a nervous breakdown.

The pain in my back and my legs are a little less intense but I have no windows since I stopped Paxil.

I read a lot of information about antidepressant withdrawal, a lot of testimony, in particular in your forum, the tinnitus topic, the 'reinstating and stabilizing' topic, etc.....

 

Now please could you give me your advice ? Because I think that the pains are withdrawal symptoms and the tinnitus an adverse reaction, isn't it ? But isn't it strange that an adverse reaction goes away after a moment, then reappears and increases ? It's more like a withdrawal symptom !  I'm really lost.

 

Thanks for your help !

Edited by scallywag
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KarenB

Bonjour Gregory and welcome to s/a,

 

Withdrawal symptoms and adverse reactions can actually present with very similar effects.  So you can get tinnitus and pains both as adverse reactions and as withdrawal symptoms.  This is because they are both caused by a Central Nervous System that is out of balance (as a result of drugs).

 

It's great you've done some reading round the site.  You will have seen that withdrawal syndrome can last for months or years, and that reinstatement this far out would be less likely to work.  However, depending on how bad things are for you - and it sounds like they are pretty bad - you may like to try it anyway.  We've had a couple of people lately who've tried it at about 6 months after their last dose.  

 

At this stage, a small dose would be best - something around 2-5mg.  What are your thoughts on that?  I'm so sorry that you got to the break-down stage.  Do you have a supportive family or friend there?  

 

Whichever way you decide, providing yourself with some very focused self-care is going to be paramount.  Fish oil and magnesium are recommended.  Plenty of rest, drink plenty of water,.  Avoid stressful situations, alcohol, coffee and strenuous exercise.  Your CNS does best with stability, and while you can't 'fix' the w/d, you can ease your way through it. 

 

Let us know what you think.  This will be your thread to record your progress and discuss your situation.  It's good to have you here Gregory.

 

Karen

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Hisame

Hello Karen,

 

I thank you for your welcome.

 

Yes my family helps me, my parents and my sister, but it's also very difficult for them, and it makes me sad to see how they are worrying for me.

I have to say that I'm really traumatized by all of these drugs, and particularly with Paxil. I already asked myself if I should reinstate Paxil in a very small dose, but I don't think it's a good idea because of the adverse reaction I still have. Now I'm scared of Paxil.

I know that the breakdown is a consequence of tinnitus, after all the pains of withdrawal, it's just too much for me. I feel desperate because I made a lot of research and I didn't find a lot of people that fully recovered from constant tinnitus. Most of people have to bear it for many and many years. When I read that, I feel tired of living.

I don't understand why this adverse effect disappeared in a first time, and then reappeared since 3 months.

Maybe someone know a case of recovery from constant tinnitus ? It seems to be really rare.

 

Thanks.

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Altostrata

Welcome, Hisame.

 

Please read What is withdrawal syndrome?
 
The Windows and Waves Pattern of Stabilization

 

It is very common for symptoms to come and go. It is possible your tinnitus will gradually disappear as your nervous system settles down.

 

I sympathize with your disinclination to reinstate Paxil because of tinnitus. You may wish to treat your pain symptoms with acupuncture, osteopathic manual therapy, or chiropractic.

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KarenB

You feel traumatised because a trauma is exactly what you have been through.  You will need time and good care to recover from this, as from any trauma.  I do understand why you are choosing not to reinstate.  Doesn't it make you so angry, the way this is done to people?  You deserve so much better. 

 

Things will start to come right.  What we find here is that people do heal, but it tends to happen slowly.

 

You may find reassurance by learning about neuro plasticity and brain remodeling.  It gave me a lot of hope when I started on this journey.  My own tinnitus was never too bad to start with, but it has improved bit by bit over the last 8-9 months. 

 

Karen

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Hisame

Hi !

 

Thanks for the links Alto. I know the waves and windows pattern, but I don't really feel it. Except in the beginning when tinnitus disappeared, but now I have it everytime since 4 months, and it gets worse. And I have everytime pain and burning sensations, only the intensity is changing.

I tried a lot of alternative medicine, osteopathic makes me feel better for a short time, but acupuncture makes me feel worse. And I like meditation but curiously after, my pains are worse.

 

Karen, I'm sorry that you have tinnitus, is it constant ? You have it since withdrawal ? It seems to be a very common symptom.

Yes of course I'm angry, but now it won't change anything, I'm rather depressed.

I read a lot about neuro plasticity, for people who had cerebrovascular accident, they recover sometimes because they can relearning everything by doing exercices like children. The brain knows where to go.

But how could I help my brain to hear again silence, and have no pain, after 14 years with Paxil ? Not sure that after that, the brain knows where to go.... like for amputated people who have phantom pains....

 

What do you think ?

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KarenB

Well, there are all sorts of variants and possibilities, but I seem to believe whole-heartedly that I will heal.  Oddly, this is probably the most optimistic I've ever been in my life. 

 

Yes, I did have tinnitus since starting w/d, but it is much better these days - only shows up very occasionally at night now. 

 

Just keep giving yourself the best healing conditions that you can - aim for the moon!

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Hisame

Hi Karen !

Thanks for your optimism !

And in the beginning your Tinnitus was constant or also occasionnally ?

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KarenB

It was constant at night, but only occasionally during the day.  Especially if I did too much.

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Hisame

Thanks for this detail Karen. I'm looking for stories about tinnitus healing.

I hope you're fine : )

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SkyBlue

Bonjour Gregory, 

 

I wanted to say welcome to the forum and, although it is difficult, to hang in there. 

 

I have been on Paxil for about 19 years, so I understand how it is to wean off of. 

 

We are all here for you!! :)

Sarah

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Hisame

Hi Sarah !

Thanks for your post. I try to hang on, it's really hard. I have like you suicidal thoughts, every days : (

I think about my whole life and feel like I never get out of this. That damned paxil....

I read your story, so long and difficult ! You're almost free from Paxil !

I wish you the best : )

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romina95

Paxil withdrawal is no joke :( Im sorry you are going through it right now..try to hang in there

Hugs

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Hisame

Hi Romina,

Thanks for your support : )

It's sad to see that a young girl like you took meds since the age of 15 : (

It should not exist.

One day you will be free ! Courage !

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SkyBlue

Hi Sarah !

Thanks for your post. I try to hang on, it's really hard. I have like you suicidal thoughts, every days : (

I think about my whole life and feel like I never get out of this. That damned paxil....

I read your story, so long and difficult ! You're almost free from Paxil !

I wish you the best : )

 

@Hisame, you are very welcome. Thank you for your kind words!!! :wub: Merci. Hisame, do you have resources, 

support for the suicidal thoughts? In other words, while it is extremely uncomfortable, you are safe? 

 

I am confident that you definitely will get out of this. But yes, that damned paxil!!!!!!!   Hugs and keep in touch.

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Hisame

Thanks Sarah for your encouragement. My family supports me, my parents and my sister. It's hard for them too : (

Hugs.

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Hisame

One question please, how can you use emoticons in your message. I see no option when I'm writing ?

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SkyBlue

oh, yes! On my computer, it is right above the text box. There is a happy face icon. It also seems to work if you do

:    )   (but spaced closer together).  :)

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Hisame

Thanks Sarah. I don't see any emoticon, that's strange, maybe my ipad. I will try with my computer........

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SkyBlue

You're welcome! I think the site is different on iPad vs. computer. 

 

How are you doing? 

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Hisame

Hi Sarah,

 

Thanks for asking me how I'm doing. I hope you're ok : )

 

Unfortunately I'm still feeling bad. Tinnitus has slightly increased month after month, like pains throughout my body. I have no windows since 4 months.

I can manage the pains because I live with it since a long time, but the ring in my ears, it's too much, it turns off all of my positive thoughts, it wear me out. I'm crying often, I'm anxious to go to bed because it's worse at night.

I'm a depressed and very anxious person since my childhood, it has always been difficult for me to live and this is why I finally fall in meds. Now things gets more and more difficult, and because of that I feel like I will never be happy in my life : (

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SkyBlue

Hi Hisame, 

 

I'm sorry -- I didn't see this yesterday.

 

The tinnitus sounds very bad. 

 

Please have hope. I know that must sound silly, but -- there are so many people on this site who have gotten better, even though it has taken a while. 

 

It takes a very strong person not to get overwhelmed by this. Hang in there, Hisame. 

 

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SkyBlue

How are you doing, Hisame?

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Hisame

Hi Sarah,

You're very sweet for asking.

It's sad but I feel desperate. Almost 6 months after paxil and it's like things has got worse.

I really have no motivation for posting : (

Sorry.

I hope You're going fine.

Grégory.

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KarenB

Hi Hisame, so sorry things are worse.  For some people - most unfairly - w/d does take longer to end.  There are other members here who are also waiting a long time.  Are there supportive people in your life, or things that you are doing to get yourself through this difficult time? 

 

For you will heal - managing until then is the tricky part.  I hope that you have some hope and belief that you will heal. 

 

Non-Drug Techniques to cope with emotional symptoms.

 

Hugs,

Karen

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SkyBlue

Hi Grégory, 

Please hang in there… You will look back at this and be amazed at how strong you are to survive it.

 

Hugs!!! 

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SkyBlue

Hisame, are you still around? I sent you a message also. Just want to make sure you are still with us. I hope you are ok. 

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Hisame

Hi Sarah, I answered your message. Thanks !

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SkyBlue

:) 

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SkyBlue

Hisame, are you still around? Are you okay?

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Hisame

Hi Sarah,

I send you a pm.

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Hisame
Posted (edited)

Hi !
It has been a long time since I came here to make an update.
I'm in a withdrawal syndrome for four years. No really improvement, symptoms have been added slowly, one after another.
I became extremely sensitive to noises, that gives me a lot of stress, and that turned into akathisia. And I got sick in early 2018, this turned into chronic nausea and prostatitis that caused me a lot of pain.
This year, akathisia fall asleep and neuropathic pain was a little better.
But, this august, I had to go to the dentist for a broken filling. He made a local injection and since that, I'm in hell. (I called few days later to have the name of the product : Septanest -> articaïne and adrenaline) This has increased my neuropathic pain that are located in my cheeks when I sit. Now, It's in addition in all my back, and my arms and feets are numb when I lie down. The pain has highly increased. It's been two weeks and it has worsened. I can't relax when I sit, I can't sleep more than two hours. I'm afraid that this will last for so long.
I'm really really bad, so much that I think about reinstatement or another drugs, just in order to give me the last chance.
I read Ashton, Shipko, the reinstatement topic, I know it's really risky. But I'm desperate. I have wait 4 years, I have made considerable efforts to cope with suffering, and to end up like that just for a visit to the dentist, It's horribly discouraging.
Sorry for that sad testimony.
Feel free to give me your advice.
Thanks.

 

Edited by ChessieCat
reworded obscenity

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ChessieCat

Seems like you are still in WD from all the changes you made several years ago and you are in a very sensitive state so any medication could trip things off.  You should give the injection a month of so to stabilize and wear off.  Adding anything new would just stir the pot.

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Hisame

Thanks ChessieCat,

I know all of that, the voice of reason. This is why I didn't touch anything since 4 years.

It's just.... I'm tired.

As you suggest I will wait a month and see if it moves.

And I'm sure it will move, but to where ? When I see the evolution since these 4 years...

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ChessieCat

That was actually BrassMonkey's voice of reason so I don't want to take the credit for it.  😉

 

BrassMonkey wrote these in 2018 so you probably haven't seen them:  are-we-there-yet-how-long-is-withdrawal-going-to-take

 

We can get battle weary.  When we aren't well it seems like forever.  As Alto often says it is going to take time, much longer than you want it to and can be very frustrating.

 

 

Are you doing any non drug calming techniques to soothe your nervous system?  I suggest that you set a reminder for several times throughout the day and do some relaxation and/or breathing exercises.

 

It's also important to learn to accept that it is what it is at this time.  Learning to accept can help reduce the stress we create in our body.  Acceptance

 

If in the future you do decide to take something, please be sure to start with a small dose to see how it affects you.

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Hisame

Thanks ChessieCat, you’re very sweet.

 

3 hours ago, ChessieCat said:

BrassMonkey wrote these in 2018 so you probably haven't seen them:  are-we-there-yet-how-long-is-withdrawal-going-to-take

Wow I didn’t read Brassmonkey, he could write a book 😉

 

3 hours ago, ChessieCat said:

We can get battle weary.  When we aren't well it seems like forever.  As Alto often says it is going to take time, much longer than you want it to and can be very frustrating..

This is so true. I realized this a lot of time. It’s more easy when symptoms lasts only several days, and then is replaced by others, like a rubik’s cube. I’m living it everydays with all the symptoms that affect me. Tinnitus was the only continuous  symptom. 

What scares me is that’s a sort of « neurotoxic adverse reaction » this time , this is more serious 😔

 

3 hours ago, ChessieCat said:

Are you doing any non drug calming techniques to soothe your nervous system?  I suggest that you set a reminder for several times throughout the day and do some relaxation and/or breathing exercises.

I walk in nature.

 

3 hours ago, ChessieCat said:

If in the future you do decide to take something, please be sure to start with a small dose to see how it affects you.

If pain remains unbearable and last for too long, I think I will have no choice.

I only read one successfully reinstatement after a long time off the drug, that’s Mappleleafgirl, and she doesn’t post anymore 😥

 

Thanks again.

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