Jump to content
Whistleblower

Citalopram is the divorce drug

Recommended Posts

Whistleblower

Been browsing this site for awhile. Never posted until today. My story is as follows. Married the girl I began dating as a junior in high school. Dated through college. Married in 1996. Was a good marriage. Both of us had careers. Had a child. I wasn't perfect. Neither was she. Career stress yes. Daily life was good. Her love for me was expressed daily as was mine. We had a long history. Both our families were great. Then in 2010 my world changed big time. My once affectionate loving partner started acting different. No affection. Would walk by me and not look at me. Started staying away. Began to find fault with everything about me. Became very selfish and confident. Started arguments about anything. Would pull away from a hug with a look of disgust. I began to notice her family staying away. I talked to her dad and he just stated she was over it. Over what? I asked. No real answer. In October I found a citalopram bottle. I Google it and oh boy did the lights ever come on. I confronted her about my evidence and all I can say is wow. She was hostile. Aggressive. Declared she had never loved me ever. Said she wanted to end the relationship as quickly as possible. Screamed for me to get out with a lot of cussing. I had never heard this woman utter one badword. Needless to say I left. Over the next year I saw horrendous things I can't believe. This loving calm person partied it up. Dated other guys. Put a profile on dating sites. Told everyone in our town I was abusive. That I was an alcoholic. Etc....even had her dad staying in my house with a gun because in her manic no sleep dreaming state could not tell reality from dreams....while all of this was going on my son basically stayed with me. I would hear things and I just couldn't believe it. I would have never believed a drug could do such a thing. She remarried within months. Ran off to vegas. Didnt even include our child. Of course her family believed every crazy lie she uttered and I was so saddened by that. They literally loved me up until the week she began this drug...I saw a woman turn into a selfish self centered crazy person who changed in every way. Even dressed different. Different taste in men. Wanting new things. New 3 new cars. Three hundred and twenty five thousand dollar house, tons of vacations and trips. A woman who was satisfied before with a good book and some relaxing in the hammock was now so different. In 2014 I told her I wanted no contact until she was off the drug...she became enraged stating she hadn't been on it in two years, yet a week later in front of our son told an insurance agent she was on it while filing for life insurance. He was upset that she lied. Fact is she tried to get off. She couldnt. Literally sick in bed. She likes the way she feels on it. My ex wife is gone forever. I have moved on. I met a sweet lady. I was upfront with her. Ssri drugs are my it litmus test. I will never ever be with anyone that has ever used these drugs, is on them, or doesn't understand what they do. They destroy lives, families, and individuals. The drugs are the devil in a bottle. I am damaged forever. But I am healing everyday. If I didn't live it I wouldn't understand it. And that is why this drug is so deceptive. Unless you have lived it you don't see it. The worst isn't over. We have a lot more mass shootings, soldier suicides, mothers killing kids, etc. I believe this is one of the biggest deceptions ever put on humanity. So thus the name whistleblower. Any of you fromm the old marriages destroyed site on topix will remember me as lost. Good luck all and God bless all of you. Sorry for typos or misspelling. I'm in a hurry using a tablet...

Share this post


Link to post
mylifeisback

I know exactly how you feel, the same exact medicine almost destroyed my family.

Share this post


Link to post
Whistleblower

Now that I understand what this drug is, and how it works, I can spot it a mile away. I've seen a lot of divorces and I know what happened, while others including the people going through it do not. I can watch a crime report on the news and see that Prozac stare nearly every time. It's all around us. I wish I knew what I know now before this drug destroyed my family. But I've yet to meet someone who is aware before the damage is done. I've seen dentists try to prescribe this poisen for teeth grinding. Yes! Teeth grinding. How stupid is that? I'm mad. And I always will be.

Share this post


Link to post
TeaBea

I've been reading back through some of the archived Topix discussions and remember seeing "Lost" postings.  I'm so sorry for your loss.  Thanks for telling your story again.  

 

SSRIs by any other name are still SSRIs. In our case, it's Effexor.  Luckily, my husband didn't go off the deep end (relationship-wise), but our relationship was worsening because of his apathy and disinhibition, especially when alcohol was concerned (Effexor turned him into an alcoholic) which was all the time there at the end.  He had to go up on his dose after about 8 years, and that's when he got much worse--who knows where it might've ended if something hadn't happened that helped me make the connection with the med to his alcohol abuse and his increasingly inappropriate behavior.  I credit sites like this and people's testimonials about how SSRIs either turned them into alcoholics or ruined their relationships with helping me figure it out.  

 

I agree that doctors are way too quick to pull out the Rx pad to prescribe SSRIs for things like teeth grinding.  My husband went to the doctor hoping for a script for Ativan (or similar) for use AS NEEDED for occasional anxious business situations.  He'd had it for a couple of years in our old location, using it mainly as a security blanket--the bottle in his briefcase let him know that if he felt he might have a panic attack in a big meeting, that help was there.  He had such a stockpile of pills from non-use that he managed for another few years on this stash when we moved out of state.  The new doctor, however, wouldn't give him a script for it alone, for AS NEEDED.  Oh NOOOO.....he HAD to get him on an SSRI and THEN he gave him the benzo script (Klonopin) for EVERY DAY.  WTF!?!?   That will never make sense to me.  

 

An acquaintance of mine told me last year that she went to her doctor because she was starting to have hot flashes...oh, and her husband had called her irritable.  What script did she come home with?  Effexor.  When she started sweating abnormally (due to the Effexor--a common side effect which my husband also had), the doctor said "oh no, that's not Effexor....here--we'll adjust your blood pressure med to see if that helps."  This same person ended up in the ER 3 times last year, hospitalized overnight on one of those occasions because of feeling so horrible--only after the third occurrence did she realize the common denominator to those 3 events:  she'd missed 2-3 days of Effexor.  We both shared our misgivings about the med, but by this time, she was "enjoying" its good effects in her life--she got put on short-term disability, enjoying no anxiety, etc--and chose not to listen.

 

It burns me up to hear about the cavalier way these drugs are handed out--like they're no more bad for you than candy.  

 

I'd like to see this happen:  Except in the case of someone experiencing extreme psychological distress (as determined by a psychiatrist or other mental health professional) who is a danger to themselves or others, these meds need to be dispensed with the full knowledge and participation of a "significant other".  They need to be made aware of what to look for (behavior changes) and allowed to have a say once behaviors are recognized.  If I'd been told, I'd have suspected the connection within the first 6 months, not EIGHT years later.  My husband admits that while on Effexor, he could NOT tell what he was doing was "out of the ordinary" at all.  It was only after reducing to under 50% of his dose did the "fog" lift from his brain and allow him to see it.  

 

I agree with you--I wouldn't want any future relationship to ever include that med again.  I also wish that any presidential candidate had to disclose any SSRI use!   Good judgement is critical, isn't it?  Just last night hearing one candidate say of another that he sweats so much he drenches his suit, that he's never seen anyone sweat that much before in his life.  Could be "normal".....but what if it's Effexor?  My husband agreed, too.  

Share this post


Link to post
Whistleblower

I agree almost entirely with you,except, under no circumstances should these drugs be prescribed. Everything about them is a lie. It not only has been proven that seritonin is not low in depression but high. It's also been discovered that the body's natural reaction to the increase in seritonin is to shut down production thus creating depression. It's a bold faced lie and the drugs eventually do the exact opposite of what they are told to do. Doctors are absolutely ignorant to it. Half of them are on it. Trust me. I work in emergency services and half or more of the er staff are on it. When I see the drugs in the er pharmacy, most are ssri drugs. Nearly every person who comes into the er after self harming or attempting suicide is on it....the ssri drugs are total b.s. they should be banned and the pharma companies who have been skewing data in the name of profits should be held accountable...under no condition should anyone be put on a drug that is a lie and works like these...it's in the drug insert just to cover their butts. But nobody cares.

Share this post


Link to post
Whistleblower

Our prisons are literally full of people who did heinous crimes or acts while in the first month of ssri drugs, or changed dose, or self medicated, who were in a sleep rem disorder and could not distinguish dreams from reality and literally have no memory of the act...want some examples? Hollywood news is full of it...I can name plenty.

Share this post


Link to post
Whistleblower

Oh btw. Just to show you how bad this really is. Hippa laws protecting patient privacy were put in place by non other than big pharma lobbyists. Kinda hard to sue if you don't know what drug did it. Oh boy are they smart. Remember now, Lilly spent way more on advertising last year than research. I'm ticked people.

Share this post


Link to post
Rhiannon

Now that I understand what this drug is, and how it works, I can spot it a mile away. I've seen a lot of divorces and I know what happened, while others including the people going through it do not. I can watch a crime report on the news and see that Prozac stare nearly every time. It's all around us. I wish I knew what I know now before this drug destroyed my family. But I've yet to meet someone who is aware before the damage is done. I've seen dentists try to prescribe this poisen for teeth grinding. Yes! Teeth grinding. How stupid is that? I'm mad. And I always will be.

 

That's crazy, I was told my SSRI was the cause of the teeth grinding that pretty much wiped out my lower molars.

 

Also, I agree with the rest of what you're saying. I've seen what the drugs did to me. I've also read Peter  Breggin's work and of course Robert Whitaker. These are well documented with extensive citations. The evidence is there. The science has been suppressed, the study results have been suppressed or "spun", but it's there and it's real.

Share this post


Link to post
Whistleblower

It hasn't been suppressed. The studies are cherry picked by the company selling the drug. The fda is bought off...by lobbyists. Please please if anyone is on these drugs please wean off slowly. And everyone will have to go through some pain to get off...these drugs are changing names constantly, along with patents to keep profits up....pay attention. It has nothing to do with your well being, just profits...

Share this post


Link to post
Whistleblower

Every person you talk to says their doctor said something different. Or they were prescribed for this or that reason, often contradicting each other. Doctors are only saying what sexy sells reps in skirts told them. Yes that's right. Pharma uses sexy women in skirts to persuade...it's literally that bad.

Share this post


Link to post
alchemist

https://www.facebook.com/groups/SSRIdivorce/

That is the link of a new group on facebook. This is their description:

This discussion has been going on since 2007 in a Topix forum that has been deleted, so I am starting a new thread in hopes that those who were discussing this topic will find it and continue to support each other. So many people came to that thread because they found themselves married to a stranger after their spouse started taking an SSRI/SNRI. These drugs change the chemical balance of the brain causing people to change almost overnight. Spouses devoted to their husband/wife and children suddenly are no longer connected and no longer feel love. Instead, because of these same chemical imbalances, they are drawn to having affairs, going on spending sprees, gambling, partying, lying, and doing anything that gives an immediate thrill. They become selfish people who leave the well-established, healthy family they helped to build, they tear their family apart and walk away. 

It was this thread where people learned that it was the drugs that caused this shift in their loved ones thinking/behavior. Unfortunately, this is just one of many dangerous side effects of these drugs. We have been duped by the pharmaceutical companies into believing that depression is caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain, but this has since been proven to be a scam as there is no way to measure the chemicals in the brain. If they can't measure them, how do they know there is a deficiency or imbalance? No, instead, big pharma marketed this as being the cause of the epidemic of depression and anxiety and in turn they have made bagillions of dollars in profits while the side effects of these drugs cause things like: 

destruction of marriages
infidelity
gambling addictions
alcoholism
anxiety
suicide and homocide ideation and successful attempts
hot flashes
cold intolerance
heat intolerance
vision loss
hypothyroidism (doctors are prescribing this for Graves' disease now)
MS/Parkinson symptoms
seizures
anhedonia (inability to experience pleasure)
insomnia
sexual dysfunction

just to mention a few.

Unfortunately, even if the unmedicated spouse is able to convince the medicated spouse that the sudden change in affection/behavior has been caused by the drugs (very difficult to convince the drug user of this), stopping this medication or any of the SSRI medications can be absolute torture. If not tapered slowly, the withdrawals can be horrific and last a long, long time, leaving people wondering why they ever started them in the first place. 

These drugs are dangerous. They are being prescribed for everything from hot flashes to fibromyalgia to depression/anxiety. After all is said and done, these drugs do more harm than good.

Share this post


Link to post
Whistleblower

This is something that needs said and most of you won't like what I'm about to tell you. ..look this up if you want, I've actually printed it off and kept it. A few scholars have talked about it, but for the most part it's hidden or denied. Ssri drugs dump and suppress dopamine in the brain. Dopamine is what gives you love, attachment, butterflies during a kiss, etc....this is a necessary brain chemical in partners....it's what bonds us. It is our reward and pleasure. It's absolutely critical in relationships....that being said...meth users will tell you their first hit of meth was like their best orgasm times one thousand. That's because meth dumped all the brains dopamine making them feel awsome....but what people are to ignorant to realize is ssri drugs do the same, just takes awhile. A meth user who gets clean takes on average under healthy diet and lifestyle seven years for the body to replenish the dopamine. That's what puberty was all about. So if any ssri user thinks that once they taper off then they are free and clear are dead wrong. Like meth, it will take a long time for your brain and body to replenish the dopamine. Yes folks, ssri drugs are like meth.....and your getting off will take a long time.....rediculous isn't it? And the idiotic psychiatric manuals now after years of denial admit to protracted withdrawl. Look that up. Good grief people. We literally need congressional hearings on this. It's bad.

Share this post


Link to post
TobinEU

Whistleblower,please could you provide a link or source?

Share this post


Link to post
btdt

This is something that needs said and most of you won't like what I'm about to tell you. ..look this up if you want, I've actually printed it off and kept it. A few scholars have talked about it, but for the most part it's hidden or denied. Ssri drugs dump and suppress dopamine in the brain. Dopamine is what gives you love, attachment, butterflies during a kiss, etc....this is a necessary brain chemical in partners....it's what bonds us. It is our reward and pleasure. It's absolutely critical in relationships....that being said...meth users will tell you their first hit of meth was like their best orgasm times one thousand. That's because meth dumped all the brains dopamine making them feel awsome....but what people are to ignorant to realize is ssri drugs do the same, just takes awhile. A meth user who gets clean takes on average under healthy diet and lifestyle seven years for the body to replenish the dopamine. That's what puberty was all about. So if any ssri user thinks that once they taper off then they are free and clear are dead wrong. Like meth, it will take a long time for your brain and body to replenish the dopamine. Yes folks, ssri drugs are like meth.....and your getting off will take a long time.....rediculous isn't it? And the idiotic psychiatric manuals now after years of denial admit to protracted withdrawl. Look that up. Good grief people. We literally need congressional hearings on this. It's bad.

I don't like fb as there is no privacy NONE all tracted Germany is looking into it ;) just heard that on the news... there is the thread here about this topic if you want to read more. 

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/6714-marriages-destroyed-by-ssri-snri-topix/?hl=%2Bmarriages+%2Bdestroyed

Share this post


Link to post
btdt

This is something that needs said and most of you won't like what I'm about to tell you. ..look this up if you want, I've actually printed it off and kept it. A few scholars have talked about it, but for the most part it's hidden or denied. Ssri drugs dump and suppress dopamine in the brain. Dopamine is what gives you love, attachment, butterflies during a kiss, etc....this is a necessary brain chemical in partners....it's what bonds us. It is our reward and pleasure. It's absolutely critical in relationships....that being said...meth users will tell you their first hit of meth was like their best orgasm times one thousand. That's because meth dumped all the brains dopamine making them feel awsome....but what people are to ignorant to realize is ssri drugs do the same, just takes awhile. A meth user who gets clean takes on average under healthy diet and lifestyle seven years for the body to replenish the dopamine. That's what puberty was all about. So if any ssri user thinks that once they taper off then they are free and clear are dead wrong. Like meth, it will take a long time for your brain and body to replenish the dopamine. Yes folks, ssri drugs are like meth.....and your getting off will take a long time.....rediculous isn't it? And the idiotic psychiatric manuals now after years of denial admit to protracted withdrawl. Look that up. Good grief people. We literally need congressional hearings on this. It's bad.

been there done that 

 

it did not work..

Congress Hammers FDA Over Handling of SSRIs -- Rosack ...
www.antidepressantsfacts.com/2004-10-15-Congress-hammers-FDA-SSRIs....
Oct 15, 2004 - Congress Hammers FDA Over Handling of SSRIs ... During a dramatic pair of hearings before the House Energy and Commerce Committee's ...
Expert FDA Report: SSRI Suicide risk – SF Chronicle / NYT ...
ahrp.org/expert-fda-report-ssri-suicide-risk-sf-chronicle-nyt-nj-ledger-ap/
  •  
Expert FDA Report: SSRI Suicide risk_SF Chronicle / NYT/ NJ Ledger/ AP. Fri, 16 Apr 2004. FDA officials have provoked congressional hearings at which they ...
Cong Hearing Re: Disclosure Pediatric SSRI Trials | AHRP
ahrp.org/cong-hearing-re-disclosure-pediatric-ssri-trials/
  •  
Cong Hearing Re: Disclosure Pediatric SSRI Trials ... by the House subcommittee on oversight and investigations, chaired by Congressman James Greenwood.
SSRI Antidepressant Drug Induced Suicide in the Military ...
jeffreydachmd.com/2015/03/ssri-antidepressant-induced-suicide-military/
  •  
Mar 23, 2015 - Both sides of the debate were examined in a recent Congressional Hearing at the VA Affairs Hearing Feb 2010. Left image courtesy of Time ...
Article: SSRI Experts Head to Washington to Testify Before ...
www.opednews.com/.../genera_evelyn_p_061205_ssri_experts_head_to....
  •  
Dec 5, 2006 - In between the February and September 2004 hearings, Ms Menzies met with members of Congress to discuss SSRI related suicidality and the ...
 
 
Antidepressants, A Cure Worse Than the Disease ...
www.baumhedlundlaw.com/articles/cure_menzies.php
  •  
  •  
The FDA announced and directed SSRI manufacturers to include a black-box ... Incongressional testimony related to Vioxx, an FDA epidemiologist, David ...
 
 

Share this post


Link to post
btdt
Peter R. Breggin, MD - Antidepressants & Suicide - Congressional Testimony

 

Share this post


Link to post
btdt

I've been reading back through some of the archived Topix discussions and remember seeing "Lost" postings.  I'm so sorry for your loss.  Thanks for telling your story again.  

 

SSRIs by any other name are still SSRIs. In our case, it's Effexor.  Luckily, my husband didn't go off the deep end (relationship-wise), but our relationship was worsening because of his apathy and disinhibition, especially when alcohol was concerned (Effexor turned him into an alcoholic) which was all the time there at the end.  He had to go up on his dose after about 8 years, and that's when he got much worse--who knows where it might've ended if something hadn't happened that helped me make the connection with the med to his alcohol abuse and his increasingly inappropriate behavior.  I credit sites like this and people's testimonials about how SSRIs either turned them into alcoholics or ruined their relationships with helping me figure it out.  

 

I agree that doctors are way too quick to pull out the Rx pad to prescribe SSRIs for things like teeth grinding.  My husband went to the doctor hoping for a script for Ativan (or similar) for use AS NEEDED for occasional anxious business situations.  He'd had it for a couple of years in our old location, using it mainly as a security blanket--the bottle in his briefcase let him know that if he felt he might have a panic attack in a big meeting, that help was there.  He had such a stockpile of pills from non-use that he managed for another few years on this stash when we moved out of state.  The new doctor, however, wouldn't give him a script for it alone, for AS NEEDED.  Oh NOOOO.....he HAD to get him on an SSRI and THEN he gave him the benzo script (Klonopin) for EVERY DAY.  WTF!?!?   That will never make sense to me.  

 

An acquaintance of mine told me last year that she went to her doctor because she was starting to have hot flashes...oh, and her husband had called her irritable.  What script did she come home with?  Effexor.  When she started sweating abnormally (due to the Effexor--a common side effect which my husband also had), the doctor said "oh no, that's not Effexor....here--we'll adjust your blood pressure med to see if that helps."  This same person ended up in the ER 3 times last year, hospitalized overnight on one of those occasions because of feeling so horrible--only after the third occurrence did she realize the common denominator to those 3 events:  she'd missed 2-3 days of Effexor.  We both shared our misgivings about the med, but by this time, she was "enjoying" its good effects in her life--she got put on short-term disability, enjoying no anxiety, etc--and chose not to listen.

 

It burns me up to hear about the cavalier way these drugs are handed out--like they're no more bad for you than candy.  

 

I'd like to see this happen:  Except in the case of someone experiencing extreme psychological distress (as determined by a psychiatrist or other mental health professional) who is a danger to themselves or others, these meds need to be dispensed with the full knowledgeI  and participation of a "significant other".  They need to be made aware of what to look for (behavior changes) and allowed to have a say once behaviors are recognized.  If I'd been told, I'd have suspected the connection within the first 6 months, not EIGHT years later.  My husband admits that while on Effexor, he could NOT tell what he was doing was "out of the ordinary" at all.  It was only after reducing to under 50% of his dose did the "fog" lift from his brain and allow him to see it.  

 

I agree with you--I wouldn't want any future relationship to ever include that med again.  I also wish that any presidential candidate had to disclose any SSRI use!   Good judgement is critical, isn't it?  Just last night hearing one candidate say of another that he sweats so much he drenches his suit, that he's never seen anyone sweat that much before in his life.  Could be "normal".....but what if it's Effexor?  My husband agreed, too.  

" what if it's Effexor?"

I watched a documentary awhile ago called The Man Who Saved the World ... a man who was in control of the system to launch bombs can't recall if it was nuclear or not.. sorry brain issues... but everything pointed to them being under attack... all the machines said so... but he did not launch a counter attack... on careful thought and instinct something held him back... to me it is the careful thought and instinct that is missing at some point during drug use and in wd... 

the machines had a glitch that day hence the title

 

There are some and I am one who believes side effects pooped out or wd... pick what one you want.. looks just like Post Traumatic Stress Disorder and in that state competency declines ... it is a scary thought. 

 

Who do you think would be the best leader to take on this issue and actually do something about it ... I wonder often "what would it take... could any leader make this change... 

I am not so sure it is the leader but the established systems that stay in place no matter who the leader is.. but I really don't know I don't even live in the States I am curious as to what others think of this.

peace

Share this post


Link to post
Whistleblower

Some very interesting comments. As far as dopamine connection you can Google it and get a lot of information. I will try to share my stuff privately over time. Very busy at the moment and I do not have a smart phone. I refuse to get one. As far as who can change things in this whole mess. One person at a time. The whole pharma and psychiatric thing in today's world is absolutely screwed up. Pharma is billions per quarter profit companies profit driven. They spend more money on advertising than they do research. Lobbyists influence policy makers before it is even really looked at. The diagnostic manuals have ran rampant adding stupid new conditions to prescribe for such as work shift disorder, shyness is now a mental condition. Sweaty palms in public is a new condition. Really? Work shift disorder? Sleep is the needed drug. SHYNESS. They spend more time trying to figure out ways and reasons to prescribe a drug than they do trying to heal a real problem. It's entirely profit driven. Pretty hard to convince me we have had any real concrete government oversight or hearings on the matter. Ssri and index to crime is a real concern and should be for everyone. I have no doubt the Fbi crime statistics show a correlation, but it's so deep rooted of a problem, likely many in our legislature are drugged as well. But it's not fair to all of the victims of the German wings flight. It's not fair to the families of columbine. It's not fair to the ft. Hood victims. It's not fair to Andrea Yates kids. And it's not fair to me. I'm one person and I am shouting angry. It's in the headlines every day and nobody talks about it. It's on the drug insert and nobody believes it. This is part of the deception. Look, not everybody becomes homicidal on the drugs. But let's look at the facts. The drug is admitted to be no better than the placebo. Yet we put millions on it. If a mere two percent go postal, that's a lot of people. But remember folks, it's not addiction it's discontinuation syndrome. How stupid is that. Very deceptive. Taper slow and don't make big decisions or lifestyle changes while drugged. That's my two cents.

Share this post


Link to post
moonstoneblue

I just came across this by chance and 'oh wow'.

My mum has just gone from Prozac to citalipram, and well she's difficult to handle at the moment. She argues with my dad (he also is very moody at the moment though as he's newly retired), she's very touchy you can't say anything to her. She's miserable and doesn't laugh at anything, and she usually has a great sense of humour. I'm currently around 2 months into Prozac withdrawal and well we clash a little at the moment. I'm more likely to say how it is and she takes offence to everything.

I was on citalipram years ago (around 8years ago) and they made me so angry and that's why I came off.

So yeah if they say it causes divorces I'm not surprised.

Sorry I don't have anything smart to contribute but I just had to say what's going on with my mum at the moment.

Share this post


Link to post
btdt

you may want to send her and your father a link to the thread hereat SA called 

Marriages Destroyed by SSRI 

see if for yourself before talking to them about it...

peace

Share this post


Link to post
Firestorm

I wouldn't recommend this drug to anyone. Was on it for 3 years before I knew what it had done to myself, my loving supportive wife, my marriage, my health and my mental well being.

 

Talking to my lovely wife and seeing pictures of how I used to exist it is heart braking to think of all the sorrow that my mood changes inflicted on her whilst I was on them. The effects were that bad that I don't remember it.  This drug changed me, in a bad way, into a whole thing, can't call it a person.  It got so bad that when my wife asked for a divorce I had no emotions and said yes. I lost the person who means the most to me due to this evil drug, I wish I had never starting it. It effected my love, my sexual feelings towards her, my weight, my emotions, my memory, my everyday functions. Speaking to my wife I didn't wash, shave, shower, I would sleep all day or just sit in front of the TV and stare into space, start things and forget all about them- would leave pans on the stove etc. It turned me into a living zombie. 

 

Since coming of the pills, my choice- one clear moment in 3 years of fog, I have been seeing my lovely wife again. All those feeling of love and desire have returned. There is a long way to go to heal the wounds I inflicted on her but there is light at the end of the tunnel. Hopefully one day she'll forgive me or at least understand that i didn't know what i was doing.

 

I wish that none of this had ever happened and I could turn back the clock to before I starting taking these pills.

 

Please please please read this this before even thinking about taking them or some one you know taking them, they not ruin and steal your life but they ruin the lives of people close to you.

 

 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Madeleine

I wouldn't recommend this drug to anyone. Was on it for 3 years before I knew what it had done to myself, my loving supportive wife, my marriage, my health and my mental well being.

 

Talking to my lovely wife and seeing pictures of how I used to exist it is heart braking to think of all the sorrow that my mood changes inflicted on her whilst I was on them. The effects were that bad that I don't remember it.  This drug changed me, in a bad way, into a whole thing, can't call it a person.  It got so bad that when my wife asked for a divorce I had no emotions and said yes. I lost the person who means the most to me due to this evil drug, I wish I had never starting it. It effected my love, my sexual feelings towards her, my weight, my emotions, my memory, my everyday functions. Speaking to my wife I didn't wash, shave, shower, I would sleep all day or just sit in front of the TV and stare into space, start things and forget all about them- would leave pans on the stove etc. It turned me into a living zombie. 

 

Since coming of the pills, my choice- one clear moment in 3 years of fog, I have been seeing my lovely wife again. All those feeling of love and desire have returned. There is a long way to go to heal the wounds I inflicted on her but there is light at the end of the tunnel. Hopefully one day she'll forgive me or at least understand that i didn't know what i was doing.

 

I wish that none of this had ever happened and I could turn back the clock to before I starting taking these pills.

 

Please please please read this this before even thinking about taking them or some one you know taking them, they not ruin and steal your life but they ruin the lives of people close to you.

 

I hope you make up with your wife. There are cases of people remarrying.  If you love her, why not!?  Tell her to come to this site and get her to understand that you were "disabled" by these drugs during the time you were on them.  Marriage is for "in sickness and in health" and you were not healthy on them.  How did you get off them? 

Share this post


Link to post
dewayne76

Back after a long break. Living my life. Suddenly been missing my friend (my ex) very much, next thing I know, I'm googling the subject again. For some reason I thought this board was closed?? Anyway, back to topic. I hope you find what you're looking for out of this situation. I hope things work out great for you. As for me, however, after reviewing the b/s my ex wife did to our family, as much as I'd like to "see my old friend" again, I could never, WOULD NEVER, go back to her. 

Way too much risk. I have a woman who loves me and my kiddo and just as soon as I feel "normal" again, I may ask her to marry me. But, that's a different story. She knows about my ex, about the meds etc. The greatest thing? She's got a master's in psychology (of some sort, forget technical name of it) but she knows full well of the meds and how bad they are... when I met her she knew a lot, but now she understands the full scope of them. 

Anyway, just felt like posting. 

Share this post


Link to post
Konjo

It is great to see you here Dewayne again. Thanks for your update. 

Could you tell me - is there any change in your ex behavior?  Is she still married to this young guy and lives in trailer park?

Share this post


Link to post
Liz1978

I realize this is quite an old post, but while researching how to help my husband come off of citalopram, this came up, and I feel I need to respond.

 

I don't feel any SSRI has the capacity to break up a marriage by itself.  It is odd to me she wouldn't discuss the medication with her husband (though she's certainly in her legal rights to).  For my own marriage, we discuss medical issues with each other constantly, and none more than SSRIs lately.  I feel that, perhaps, she had issues before taking the medicine; people don't take these things for no reason.  Usually, it's an underlying issue of depression or anxiety, possibly obsessive thoughts.  The fact that the husband had no clue that she was possibly dealing with these issues seems odd to me.

 

I also don't feel that judging people for taking SSRIs is a good litmus test of anything, beyond knowing that the person probably struggles with depression or anxiety in some form, or perhaps had a rough patch where they needed to be on something in order to make it through their everyday lives. 

 

As far as personality changes go, I've not witnessed my husband go through such a change.  It's been hard on him, but he's still the same person, just less anxious.  If anything, sexuality seems to be MORE difficult for those who get on it rather than LESS.  But I already know from getting off my own meds that it will be a process, and will see a vicious return of anxiety issues - but again, he will still be the same person. 

 

Again, I know this may seem odd to bring up, but this was one of the first two searches that came up when I Googled "How to help husband off of citalopram", and felt it was important to speak up about my common experience. 

 

While I can definitely see that SSRIs (and getting off them) may cause divorce in a lot of cases because of rage attacks, crying fits, and other intense emotional difficulties, I think this kind of divorce - where the person completely turns their back on the marriage and literally turns into a completely different human being - is very, very rare.  But I could be wrong. 

 

In the end, all of these things can and have happened in marriages long before SSRIs existed.  We need to be educated and perfectly clear and brutally honest about ourselves and the meds, and not just blame SSRIs for everything that goes wrong in our families.  We have to be willing to accept that sometimes people just leave.  They decide they want to try something different.  It could have happened even without drugs.  Not taking them is no guarantee of a happy, successful marriage, because that takes work.  It takes willingness to listen and understand each other.  Without that, it won't succeed...regardless of if SSRIs are in the picture or not. 

Share this post


Link to post
Ydgully

Not sure why im back here i noticed the post by liz .

I hope your journey connected with an ssri is ok .

From my point of view i think you’re wrong ,the drugs messing relationships up are not a rare event , i can relate to the events written about on here and if hadn’t lived it myself as a spouse would not have believed them , i have seen it with friends , acquaintances and work colleagues , now I know what to look for and usually my gut tells me first ! 

Anyway my point is that trying to communicate with a person who is rageing  and angry is impossible i liken it to trying to have an adult conversation with a six year old .

Looking back I should have believed more about the divorce drug effects  and taken action as some suggested like making financial plans , looking for affairs  and narcissistic tendencies , etc 

anyway my second point is indirectly these drugs haven’t ruined my life just steeply changed its direction and made me a stronger wiser person  so for any partner  going through this mess there is hope and anyone thinking of using an ssri please first try counselling. 

rant over thanks . 

 

 

Share this post


Link to post

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use.