CallaLily Posted April 29, 2016 Share Posted April 29, 2016 Hi everyone, I haven't seen much reference to diagnosis on here - is there a reason for this? ie. we are NOT our diagnosis! I'm totally fine with that, however, I'd love to make contact with other people who were 'bipolar' and what their tips are for dealing with hypermania/mania/depression bouts. I'm 2 weeks in with Lithium taper (12.5%) with minimal issues. Cayperz (happy Friday!) Off Lithium (1000mg) since December 2016 Off Lamictal (50mg)since June 2016 Off Abilify (5/10mg) since 2015 It's diagnonsense! So, I threw it to the wind and kept walking... And I will never go back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Emeritus SquirrellyGirl Posted April 29, 2016 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted April 29, 2016 That is a great observation, Cayperz! Being labeled leads to being drugged, and around here we are all coming to see the light, that the psych profession is medicating away the ups and downs that are life. Aside from life throwing us curve balls, there's all kinds of other triggers for emotional upset. For instance, the physiological, not psychological, causes that are misdiagnosed and so psych meds are thrown at the problem. Just chatted with someone on here earlier today who was thrown on an AD after a short interview with a doctor, only to later learn that she had chronic Lymes disease. Or the hypothyroid cases that were depressed due to the hormone balance, but ended up on ADs because the doctor didn't look any further than the label "major depression." I have a friend who is doing a type of cognitive therapy that is based on neuroplasticity and rewiring the brain, and he is bipolar. He has been able to identify when he is starting to get manic and switch it off with great success. It's really about tuning into the feelings and grounding himself with Presence. Peter Breggin writes of being able to help schizophrenics without drugs, through acknowledging that the voices are trying to communicate about a past trauma. I'd always thought that schizophrenia really was a condition that needed to be medicated, but I've since learned that that is absolutely not the case. MadInAmerica.com has loads of articles educating about mental afflictions and alternative paths to healing. And then there's all the bi-polar diagnoses and medicating due to side effects of psych drugs!! Looking at your sig, it looks like your story has a similar plot with marijuana withdrawal. Thanks for posing the question! SG Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac. Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002 Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history. Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots! Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off. Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep. June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened! Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015. Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month. 12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18: 2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679 This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CallaLily Posted April 29, 2016 Author Share Posted April 29, 2016 Thanks SG That makes a lot of sense... I like what you said: "Being labeled leads to being drugged, and around here we are all coming to see the light, that the psych profession is medicating away the ups and downs that are life. Aside from life throwing us curve balls, there's all kinds of other triggers for emotional upset" On top of my withdrawal from weed, my Dad died 8 months before (we were very close - I also became his main carer) and I went on an extended OS holiday (all on my lonesome for the first time in my life) to a country I'd never visited before - America! it was whilst I was there that I had three manic episodes and experienced psychosis for over 3 weeks. I was in a terrible way, to be honest but at the same time, I felt a massive spiritual connection to my life and everyone around me. During all of that, childhood/adult traumas came to life for me in a massive way and I almost fell to pieces. I knew that if I started crying, I would most likely never stop. I still haven't cried about it. (perhaps I will throughout my withdrawal... who knows?!) When I was rescued and returned to Australia, NO ONE asked me how I was FEELING. And no one listened to me either... they just wanted me diagnosed. I then drank the Kool Aid and wanted to know the diagnosis too... I refused meds for DAYS until I finally gave in at the hospital. Human rights blown away. Anyways... I've done away with the label "bipolar". It's Cayperz! Cayperz is my label! I'll look into Mad In America... I'd like to support myself as much as possible through the process... if I'm susceptible to mania and psychosis in drug withdrawal, I need to be prepared for that with Lithium. I was scared but I'm not so much anymore... this can be done! Thanks again! Cayperz Off Lithium (1000mg) since December 2016 Off Lamictal (50mg)since June 2016 Off Abilify (5/10mg) since 2015 It's diagnonsense! So, I threw it to the wind and kept walking... And I will never go back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Emeritus SquirrellyGirl Posted April 29, 2016 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted April 29, 2016 Anyways... I've done away with the label "bipolar". It's Cayperz! Cayperz is my label! I love that, Cayperz! With that attitude you're going to be fine, just fine! SG Started ADs back around 1995 after bad break-up, starting with Prozac. Switched to Wellbutrin, and then to Effexor in 2002 Effexor XR 2002-2014 up to 225 mg at one point, down to 37.5 mg towards end but back up to 75 mg in 2014; now realize I had W/D as I dropped down, memory very poor about history. Extreme emotions, poor concentration as I stepped back down, didn't connect the dots! Summer 2014 reduced to 0 very quickly, was sick of anhedonia/sexual dysfunction due to meds, depression never controlled if not worse. Didn't recognize WD since symptoms built slowly (thought I had ADD! and menopausal on top of it), starting with severe sweats, very bad cog-fog and memory issues, culminating in weight loss, severe anxiety and depression, panic, severe apathy and insomnia by eight months off. Saw p-doc who put me on Remeron, increased from 7.5 mg/day to 37.5 mg by May 22, 2015; still doing very badly though able to sleep. June 1. 2015 Reinstated Effexor XR 37.5 mg, Remeron dropped to 30 mg PM. Immediate relief of symptoms, like nothing had ever happened! Joined SA and began on advice of friend who recognized it was WD all along! Began tapering in July 2015. Been tapering both meds ever since, focusing on one more than the other or doing no more than 5% of each per month. 12 mg Effexor and 5.8 mg Remeron (mirtazapine SolTabs to make a solution with OraPlus) as of 5/4/2017 Update 3/14/18: 2.9 mg Remeron and 6 mg Effexor; 6/10/18: 2.6 mg Remeron and 4.9 mg Effexor My intro: http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/9313-squirrellygirl-effexor-withdrawal-etc/page-2#entry196679 This is not medical advice. Discuss any decisions about your medical care with a knowledgeable medical practitioner. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CallaLily Posted April 29, 2016 Author Share Posted April 29, 2016 Thanks SG - I blorry well hope so! hahaha Off Lithium (1000mg) since December 2016 Off Lamictal (50mg)since June 2016 Off Abilify (5/10mg) since 2015 It's diagnonsense! So, I threw it to the wind and kept walking... And I will never go back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
btdt Posted April 30, 2016 Share Posted April 30, 2016 Seems it all started with a drug so from the get go this has been a drug induced experience for you and a lot of stress to top it off. After all I haver read about shrinks and lived... I do wonder about them and the dx they give. I had a friend of mine call and tell me her dx ... I told her I can't take it seriously given all I have lived and know... I was not much help to her I am afraid she was very stressed by a dx that I could tell but I could not go back 30 in time and recall what that felt like. Maybe I am missing the empathy gene now... I told her not to worry about it if she were to see 3 more shrinks she would get 3 more dx... it would not matter cause whatever it was antidepressants would likely be the answer if not there were a few other answers all pills. That is my take on dx maybe in some cases they make sense I can't speak to that but I know this woman for 30 years... she needs a vacation not drugs... who could not use a vacation. If you have to have a label you picked a good one I think I would pick Jaded... cause I am. Rest with it and check the self care files for ideas pick what sounds good... I wish you peace If you want to read something this may be a good start.. http://blog.garynull.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/03/Manufacturing-Madness.pdf WARNING THIS WILL BE LONG Had a car accident in 85 Codeine was the pain med when I was release from hosp continuous use till 89 Given PROZAC by a specialist to help with nerve pain in my leg 89-90 not sure which year Was not told a thing about it being a psych med thought it was a pain killer no info about psych side effects I went nuts had hallucinations. As I had a head injury and was diagnosed with a concussion in 85 I was sent to a head injury clinic in 1990 five years after the accident. I don't think they knew I had been on prozac I did not think it a big deal and never did finish the bottle of pills. I had tests of course lots of them. Was put into a pain clinic and given amitriptyline which stopped the withdrawal but had many side effects. But I could sleep something I had not done in a very long time the pain lessened. My mother got cancer in 94 they switched my meds to Zoloft to help deal with this pressure as I was her main care giver she died in 96. I stopped zoloft in 96 had withdrawal was put on paxil went nutty quit it ct put on resperidol quit it ct had withdrawal was put on Effexor... 2years later celexa was added 20mg then increased to 40mg huge personality change went wild. Did too fast taper off Celexa 05 as I felt unwell for a long time prior... quit Effexor 150mg ct 07 found ****** 8 months into withdrawal learned some things was banned from there in 08 have kept learning since. there is really not enough room here to put my history but I have a lot of opinions about a lot of things especially any of the drugs mentioned above. One thing I would like to add here is this tidbit ALL OPIATES INCREASE SEROTONIN it is not a huge jump to being in chronic pain to being put on an ssri/snri and opiates will affect your antidepressants and your thinking. As I do not update much I will put my quit date Nov. 17 2007 I quit Effexor cold turkey. http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1096-introducing-myself-btdt/ There is a crack in everything ..That's how the light gets in Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Emeritus Shep Posted April 30, 2016 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted April 30, 2016 Hi everyone, I haven't seen much reference to diagnosis on here - is there a reason for this? ie. we are NOT our diagnosis! I'm totally fine with that, however, I'd love to make contact with other people who were 'bipolar' and what their tips are for dealing with hypermania/mania/depression bouts. I'm 2 weeks in with Lithium taper (12.5%) with minimal issues. Cayperz (happy Friday!) I'm seeing two issues being addressed here: 1. How to let go of the (mis)diagnosis. 2. How to handle the mood swings that result from withdrawal. These are two very separate issues; however, they do play off each other. I think as you are able to handle the highs and lows and other symptoms of withdrawal and recovery, you're going to naturally let go of the diagnosis. The diagnosis is based on the flawed "chemical imbalance" theory and as you find yourself handling your symptoms without meds, that theory makes less and less sense. And you'll begin to fill in your own narrative and write your own story. I have a feeling you're going to leave any psychiatric diagnosis out of your vocabulary. I know I have - it's a lighter weight to carry through life. Because I found a lot of help and a sense of peace using mindfulness, the vocabulary of mindfulness is beginning to appear in my inner dialogue. My self talk is now much kinder and gentler. I would never call myself "bipolar" or "manic depressive" or say I have a "schizoid personality", all labels handed down to me by psychiatrists. But those labels are self-defeating and inaccurate. This journey off meds and into recovery is a process in which you'll find your own way. I'm sorry for the death of your father. The fact that you were his "main carer" says a lot about you. It says you were strong enough to take care of someone else even during your own pain. Define yourself by your actions and your deeds. The vocabulary will come later. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Emeritus Petunia Posted May 2, 2016 Moderator Emeritus Share Posted May 2, 2016 On top of my withdrawal from weed, my Dad died 8 months before (we were very close - I also became his main carer) and I went on an extended OS holiday (all on my lonesome for the first time in my life) to a country I'd never visited before - America! it was whilst I was there that I had three manic episodes and experienced psychosis for over 3 weeks. I was in a terrible way, to be honest but at the same time, I felt a massive spiritual connection to my life and everyone around me. During all of that, childhood/adult traumas came to life for me in a massive way and I almost fell to pieces. I knew that if I started crying, I would most likely never stop. I still haven't cried about it. (perhaps I will throughout my withdrawal... who knows?!) When I was rescued and returned to Australia, NO ONE asked me how I was FEELING.... What you've written here reminds me of a video I watched. Have you heard of Sean Blackwell and his Bipolar or Waking Up YouTube channel? You might be interested in his alternative views on the cause of Bipolar disorder in this video: The REAL Cause of Bipolar Mania / Bipolar Disorder Here is a link to the web site where you can access all the videos and his free book about his own experiences: Bipolar or Waking Up I'm not necessarily advocating any of the services offered, but thought your may find the videos interesting. I'm not a doctor. My comments are not medical advise. These are my opinions based on my own experience and what I've learned. Please discuss your situation with a medical practitioner who has knowledge of tapering and withdrawal...if you are lucky enough to find one. My Introduction Thread Full Drug and Withdrawal History Brief Summary Several SSRIs for 13 years starting 1997 (for mild to moderate partly situational anxiety) Xanax PRN ~ Various other drugs over the years for side effects 2 month 'taper' off Lexapro 2010 Short acute withdrawal, followed by 2 -3 months of improvement then delayed protracted withdrawal DX ADHD followed by several years of stimulants and other drugs trying to manage increasing symptoms Failed reinstatement of Lexapro and trial of Prozac (became suicidal) May 2013 Found SA, learned about withdrawal, stopped taking drugs...healing begins. Protracted withdrawal, with a very sensitized nervous system, slowly recovering as time passes Supplements which have helped: Vitamin C, Magnesium, Taurine Bad reactions: Many supplements but mostly fish oil and Vitamin D June 2016 - Started daily juicing, mostly vegetables and lots of greens. Aug 2016 - Oct 2016 Best window ever, felt almost completely recovered Oct 2016 -Symptoms returned - bad days and less bad days. April 2018 - No windows, but significant improvement, it feels like permanent full recovery is close. VIDEO: Where did the chemical imbalance theory come from? VIDEO: How are psychiatric diagnoses made? VIDEO: Why do psychiatric drugs have withdrawal syndromes? VIDEO: Can psychiatric drugs cause long-lasting negative effects? VIDEO: Dr. Claire Weekes Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CallaLily Posted May 4, 2016 Author Share Posted May 4, 2016 Thanks Petunia, Fingers and Shep I have watched Sean's videos and they made SO much sense to me. I was lucky enough to have seen the videos before my experience last year so, whilst I was going through everything, I basically loved myself through it. Threw all caution to the wind and followed my heart. Many themes reappeared for me but it was cathartic. I needed to go through it again because I knew I didn't face up to much 3 years ago. Marijuana withdrawal was involved both times. Anyhoo... I'm still angry. I know I'll deal with it in time... I was treated with fear by almost everyone in my life. And all I really needed was someone to hold me and tell me it was going to be okay - and that what I was experiencing was to do with my inner (and outer!) life and the changes that needed to be made. It's made me a bit jaded also. And it's also shown me that not many people can handle true emotion and that I'll have to go through most of that alone. Too many people want to medicate away strong feelings! I fell into that trap also... I know better now. I look forward to the diagnosis drifting away and embracing my own balance and experience of life... Off Lithium (1000mg) since December 2016 Off Lamictal (50mg)since June 2016 Off Abilify (5/10mg) since 2015 It's diagnonsense! So, I threw it to the wind and kept walking... And I will never go back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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