TNTD: Wellbutrin: cold turkey due to debilitating side effect

[tntd]

I was wondering if anyone had any thoughts on this situations.

 

I've been going back into a wave but it hasn't been as bad so far as previous ones. What is new is that I'm feeling a lot more down and apathetic. I'm not sure if it's part of the w/d or if because my anxiety is decreasing the other meds I'm taking are exerting their anti-anxiety attributes and causing me to feel down. They have done it to me before. This makes me wonder if I should continue to hold. I've been debating cutting the Buspar by another 5mg, which would be a little over 10%, to see if that helps. I am taking a higher dose than I ever did previously. They kept increasing it to deal with the side effect from the Wellbutrin. Even while I was on the Wellbutrin it caused some depression at the higher dose. I'm just not sure what to do right now. I do know I don't like how down I've been feeling though. 

 

Hugs and healing,

T

[mammaP]

Hi tndt, I see you stopped bupropion on the 1st June, just 2 weeks ago. I think it would be best to hold for a while longer, changing things now could make things worse. I would give it another few weeks at least, then maybe a very tiny reduction to see how it goes. When the nervous system is unstable the slightest change can cause more symptoms. Often we feel we have to do SOMETHING, ANYTHING, but the best thing to do is nothing, just wait for our brains to adjust and stabilise.  Hopefully you will start to feel better soon, hang in there. 

[Altostrata]

Do your symptoms follow any daily pattern? What time of day do you take Buspar?

[tntd]

Hi mammaP,

 

I actually stopped taking the buproprione a year and two weeks ago . I was in a really good window when I started feeling down and then the anxiety and agoraphobia came back and I'm fully back into a wave. I had a nice approxiamtely three week window though. I have been holding everything now for almost four months. Previous to that I had cut back on the Buspar because of feeling down. I immediately felt better in that regard. I had some additional anxiety for about a week and then went back to my baseline. I would have to look back to see when I cut that but it was quite awhile ago, before I started trying to cut any benzo so before November last year. I do agree that doing nothing is a wonderful way to handle things when they get rough. I'm just concerned that since both of the meds I'm on are downers and I seem to be starting to heal from the CT they could be a cause of this new symptom. 

 

Hi Alto,

 

I take my Buspar three times a day: 30mgs at 10:30pm, 10mgs at 6:30 am, and 5mg at 2:30pm. I take it at the same time as my benzo doses to make things easier. My regular symptoms do follow a pattern. They are worse in the morning and as I've been holding my benzo taper they have started to fade in the afternoon around 2:00 or 3:00. This new symptom of feeling down seems to last all day but is worse in the morning when I first get up. 

 

I accidentally forgot to take my afternoon dose of Buspar yesterday. I've done it before on days when I have appointments and I am out when it is time to take my meds. I didn't realize I had forgotten to take it until I sat down to finish my medication journal from yesterday. I woke up with higher anxiety and agoraphobia but I was not down at all. Of course I don't know if this was causitive or coincidence but I'm tempted to just keep going, though the afternoon dose is not the one that I was planning on cutting. 

 

Thanks for all your help

[tntd]

Just wanted to pop in with an update. I've been feeling really well since last I posted two weeks ago. The change in Buspar helped my depression to go away so I'm pretty sure it was medication induced. I'm going to have to keep an eye on that since the meds, buspar and clonazepam, are what caused my depression in the first place. It would be nice if the doctors would take a look at the situation and not just the depression. I should have had my meds reduced not more meds introduced. Hindsight though and all the things I have learned. 

 

I've been feeling so well that I was able to go to a Strawberry Festival about an hour away from my home. I haven't been able to leave my city except to visit the doctor and the hospital is only 30 minutes away though it feels like it's in the same city since all of the cities in this area have grown into one another. We had a great day with our daughter and her boyfriend. It was nice to feel like I wanted to go. I'm starting to want to plan things but there is still just enough agoraphobia that thinking out too far makes me anxious. I can deal with that though. It's so nice to be functional again. I think my husband is really enjoying it as we are spending a lot more time together. We are back to grocery shopping together and gardening together and just being able to go out and do things together. Unfortunately he has a severly sprained ankle and is in a boot. I would love to go bike riding and kayaking and other outdoor activities. Hopefully next summer.

 

I am planning on starting to taper, micro taper, my benzo in July. I'm going to start with .0038mg over two days and then hold for a couple of weeks to see how things go. Hopefully it won't change anything and I'll remain just as functional. If so I'll do the same thing again to see if it remains the same and then go from there to find what is the best taper schedule for me so that I can remain in a functional state. I'm nervous about it but excited too. I am looking forward to getting off of these medications.

 

Hugs and healing,

T

[scallywag]

More great news!  I'm so glad that your symptoms are diminishing and that you're getting to enjoy more and more of life!

[tntd]

Thanks Scally,

 

I am still doing pretty well but have fallen into a bit of a wave since I wrote that. Not bad enough that I'm not functional though so a light wave. Lots of good stressors going on that I think are causing a bit of an issue. I'm just glad it's not a bad wave at the moment. Still healing. At just a little over one year out from my CT I think I'm doing amazingly well

 

Hugs and healing,

T

 

 

[tntd]

Well, this wave has been deepening. I'm hoping it doesn't last long. It has been a month since I reduced my Buspar but I do wonder if it isn't contributing to the severity of the wave. I know that w/d sxs can show up awhile later so it  has me wondering. I am still not as down as I was before I reduced the Buspar so I still think it was the right choice. I have to get off of all these meds eventually anyway. A little here and a little there and I'll get there eventually. Right now it appears it will be years before I am done with the tapering. Hopefully I will find a place where I am functional most of the time and can taper at a rate that keeps me in that place. Things don't seem as bad when I'm in a window. Right now I look at my meds and I get anxious about haivng to take them. When I'm in a window it's just something I have to do. I find it interesting that a wave can make such a difference in the way we view things.

 

I was watching Dr. Oz today and J.J. Virgin was on. Her son was in a hit and run accident and was given a .25% chance of living. She said that through the power of being positive that she had and that she had taught her sons he is now back and even better than he was before he was hit. It was very inspiring and I wrote down the things she recommends doing. I'm also going to look for her book. It's called "Miracle Mindset". 

 

Hugs and healing,

T

[tntd]

Windows and waves. I went through another pretty nice window and now am in a really deep wave. It does make a person wonder if it will ever stop and the windows will stay permanently. All in good time I suppose. I just try to hold on to the memories of the windows and know that more will come. 

 

Hugs

T

[Shep]

13 hours ago, tntd said:

I just try to hold on to the memories of the windows and know that more will come. 

 

Great advice. I hope the wave ends soon and another window opens. From my own experience, I'm finding that the worse waves are leading to the baseline healing. I hope that's true for you, too. 

[tntd]

Hi Shep,

 

Thanks for the encouraging words. I'm not sure I understand what you are saying about the worse waves though. I have to admit that I have had extremely bad cog fog with this wave and have had a hard time understanding a lot of things when I read them. Are you saying that the worse waves seem to be leading to a better baseline level for you recently? I hope that is what you are saying as you really deserve to be getting to a better place. 

 

Hugs and healing,

T

[Shep]

On 8/3/2017 at 5:44 PM, tntd said:

Are you saying that the worse waves seem to be leading to a better baseline level for you recently? I hope that is what you are saying as you really deserve to be getting to a better place. 

 

 

Thank you for your kind words, tntd. Yes, you are correct. My worst waves led to a better baseline. And now my waves aren't nearly as intense and my partial windows are expanding. 

 

Wishing you a better day today. It really does get better. 

[tntd]

Thanks Shep,

 

I'm still really struggling with this wave. I am beginning to wonder if it is from the stressors I'm still having including going to a wedding this upcoming Friday. We will be stopping in the city that we moved from and that is bringing up some intense feelings for me. Plus the anxiety of not knowing how I'm going to be feeling next Friday when we travel up to the area where the wedding is happening. I think I will be happy when it is over. I probably have a lot of anticipatory anxiety that is being amplified by my withdrawal. Sigh. I'll get through it and I'm sure I'll be happy that I went. I'll looking forward to having better baselines and less intense waves

 

Thank you so much for everything.

 

Hugs,

T

[tntd]

Wow, I didn't realize it had been that long since I had popped into this thread. 

 

So it turned out that the wave was actually w/d due to a change in generic brands of my benzo. It took awhile to get through it probably partly because I knew that some people struggle with changing generics so I tapered over to the new generic. Unfortunately it appears that the change was a lot more than I had thought it would be and the taper wasn't slow enough. I ended up with really bad w/d's for about a month after I finally finished tapering over. I just kept holding though, my doctor kept telling me I could updose. No thank you! I made it through and finally got a window. It lasted for awhile and I started to do some tiny tapering but ran into another wave so stopped the tapering again. However I did also stop taking a dose of Taurine, I take two 500mg pills a day. I am super sensitive to changes in my benzo's, my tiny taper that still causes sxs is only .0019mg once a week. Anyway Taurine also affects the GABA and I think dropping the dose may have caused my wave to intensify. In any case I seem to be starting to stabilize again so I just keep holding. 

 

Another reason to hold is that my husband is leaving on another business trip and will be gone for a week. That always stresses me out. Fortunately the stress doesn't always cause a wave. I'm hoping it doesn't cause the improvement I'm having to reverse. If it does I will survive.

 

Does anyone have any thoughts on the Taurine. I did go and read the whole thread on Taurine again so my mind has been refreshed on that information. 

 

Thanks for any comments or thoughts.

 

Hugs and healing to everyone,

T

[ChessieCat]

It sounds like you are really becoming aware of your body and know what to when the symptoms worsen.

 

I don't know anything about taurine, but anything which affects the brain I would  think could affect our withdrawal symptoms and/or cause their own withdrawal symptoms.

 

Another member ate some KFC and felt she worsened not long afterwards.  She also said that she has to be careful what she eats.  KFC contains MSG and what a lot of people don't realise is that MSG is a neuro toxin.  It tricks the brain into making flavours taste stronger.  I got hooked on Sour Cream and Chives Pringles many years ago and became so glutamate intolerant that I couldn't eat foods containing natural glutamates (peas, corn, grapes, hard cheeses, mushrooms, tomatoes, fish and soy sauces, soy protein).  My intolerance has improved/gone but I steer well clear of MSG.

[tntd]

Thanks so much ChessieCat,

 

I didn't realize all those foods had natural glutamates in them. My husband and daughter are super sensitive to MSG it gives them both almost instant migraines. It's crazy what they put in our foods to make us crave them. I've never considered that we could become intolerant of some of the additives but it makes sense, espcially with the neurotoxic ones. 

 

I hope you are doing well, thanks for you input I really appreciate it.

 

Hugs and healing,

T

[tntd]

Wow, I can't believe it's been so long since I posted. 

 

I did a long hold and then after going through withdrawal from the generic crossover I held again. I did a little tapering before the holidays and it went pretty well. I still got w/d sxs but not too bad. I decided to hold through the holidays so I wouldn't have any symptoms and could just enjoy the time with  my family. 

 

Things went really well at first but I started to go into a wave on Dec 24th. There were a number of stressful things that happened along with some hormonal issues, peri-menopause is rough. Now I'm wondering if I should continue to try to taper or wait out whatever this is. I have an appointment with my NP on Friday because I've been "on my period" since Dec 24th and I'm wondering if that is part of the problem.

 

I"m wondering if anyone has had hormonal issues that have made tapering harder and what they have done about it. I have heard that going on HRT or using progesterone can make w/d sxs worse and I've also heard that it has helped some people. My anxiety and agoraphobia are really high again so all of this is making me really scared.

 

I was really hoping that the next time I posted I would be tapering and doing ok. 

 

Hope my everyone is doing well,

 

Hugs and healing,

T

[tntd]

I had intended to post on June 1st as that is the anniversary of my CT from buproprian (Wellbutrin). It has now been two years. It's amazing to me how much better I'm doing. I can remember when I first joined SA. I really wondered if I was going to make it. Just getting from one moment to the next was so difficult. I made it though and if not for having to taper from benzos I would probably be back to my regular life. I'm still getting occasional waves but I don't know if that's from the CT or the continued injury to my brain from tapering my clonazepam. I'm lucky though, my pdoc lets me taper at my own rate and hold when I need to. It has made a huge difference for me. I started coming out of the severe withdrawals around the middle of May last year. I've had some pretty severe waves since then but most of the time things are good. I'm tapering my benzo so slowly that I'm pretty much functional most of the time. Unfortunately hormones can throw things into a mess and deliver me into a wave but even though it's still really hard to deal with a wave I do know that it will pass and that knowledge really helps.

 

I hope all are doing well.

 

Healing and hugs,

 

T

[FarmGirlWorks]

Hope for us CT people -- thanks!

[Altostrata]

Hello, @tntd, how are you doing with your tapering?