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Lex1992: 4 months off Lexapro, extreme anxiety/ruminating, can't function properly

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DrugfreeProf

Another positive update on Lex1992's withdrawal journey. As I write this, she is out on the town with friends celebrating at a bachelorette party, as one of her best friends is getting married next month, and Lexi is one of the bridesmaids. Lexi's long (going on two years) WD story is available on this thread and so I won't reiterate it here.  I (her mom) have been the one to make most of her posts because she has been too overtaken by WD symptoms to do so herself. After stopping Lexapro too quickly (but not CT) in Feb. of 2016 along with a failed, quite disastrous RI attempt in July 2016 and a forced drugging in August of 2016, she spent many months suffering from DP/DR, high anxiety, terror, etc., especially in the first year of withdrawal, and then spent the next year pretty much bed (or couch) ridden with almost all of her time devoted to watching youtube videos, generally in complete silence.   BUT as I posted a couple of months ago, around the beginning of 2018, she at last began to s-l-o-w-l-y and gradually emerge from her withdrawn, silent, frightened state, and as began "looking" more normal and expressing a range of emotions. She also, finally, is showing her sense of humor, which was always wicked and delightful, one of her best characteristics pre-WD.

Best of all, when she went to her friend's bridal shower a week ago, she dressed, looked, and acted COMPLETELY normal, as though WD had never occurred. As her mother and her carer, seeing her in a normal state like that is like revisiting heaven. Although she is not yet her old self, that old self is finally, finally re-emerging. 

As I've said before, time, and TLC, heals.

In the meantime, this incredible ordeal has led me, as a psychology professor for the past 26 years, to teach very different material to my students than I did in the years before I vicariously experienced Lexi's horrific withdrawal process. In fact, just this past week, I taught my students a module named after Peter Breggin's wonderful book, Your Drug May Be Your Problem. I tried to attached the powerpoint slides to this post but the file is too large.  If you are interested in seeing this powerpoint presentation, which is an easy to understand, basic guide as to the dangers of using SSRIs, feel free to PM me. 

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LexAnger

You are a true hero, as a mother, pchocology professor, and a human Being!

 

Congratulations to Lexi and you for surviving this most horrodous war and thanks for the inspiring update!

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Miracle123

Hi Drugfree Prof, You are such a wonderful, strong and so caring mother. I really paid my respect to you for your effort of taking care and helping her to going through withdrawals and recovery  journeys. This is a hard task and really not easy as you have to going through yourself with your daughter. Thanks you for your updated and everything about your daugther recovery process make me feel i also can feel better and healing one day like your daughter too. Its such a inspiration and great stories for me. Keep it up and i hope one day u can post you and your daughter successful stories. Congratulations.

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Glosmom

So happy to have found the story about your daughter! I am helping my daughter taper off risperidone.  It is wonderful to hear that Lexi is enjoying life again!  I wish and dream that my Glo will one day return to her former self as well.  Peace to you!

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FarmGirlWorks

The Lexi update is inspiring as is your shifted perspective on teaching psychology!

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DrugfreeProf

Thank you for your kind feedback, Miracle123, Glosmom, and FarmGirlWorks!  Being the parent and carer of a person in withdrawal is an ordeal from hell. My many hours of despair and anguish over Lexi's condition and constant uncertainty about what would hapopen next  must be similar to the very WD symptoms people like Lexi experience. Almost two years ago, I watching my odaughter, merely as a result of tapering off Lexapro over the course of a year,  go from being a very sane, high-functioning person and successful artist to losing touch with reality, losing all sense of who she is, becoming paranoid, crazy-anxious, and wholly negative, with the only silver lining being that we had already found this site when she began diving into the depths of WD and I was able to clearly see that what she was going through was, indeed, withdrawal. This site has been the only roadmap I've had while going through this treacherous territory.  You literally have to make up the map as you are going along.

I really believe there are parallels between what someone goes through in WD and what the carer--a parent like me, or a partner or spouse--goes through as they walk through hell with the person in WD.  I know oftentimes I felt like I "caught" some (not all) of Lexi's symptoms as she was going through them--the sadness, lack of motivation, spaciness, inability to eat, etc.

NO ONE should have to go through this--not the person in WD and not the people who love and are caring for the WD sufferer. 

This process has been so incredibly slow and incremental you can hardly detect any changes, although I know that they have been going on in the background. In the meantime, though, today she served as a bridesmaid for one of her best friend's wedding, and her stepfather and I were there with her. Seeing her and watching her interact with everyone looking perfectly normal and very much her old self was really an uplift. You'd never know she'd been through withdrawal--she was, today, the same Lexi everyone has always loved.

 

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bhasski
On 4/21/2018 at 7:33 AM, DrugfreeProf said:

As I've said before, time, and TLC, heals.

In the meantime, this incredible ordeal has led me, as a psychology professor for the past 26 years, to teach very different material to my students than I did in the years before I vicariously experienced Lexi's horrific withdrawal process. In fact, just this past week, I taught my students a module named after Peter Breggin's wonderful book, Your Drug May Be Your Problem.

 

Hi,

It feels great to hear about your daughter on recovery. And how as a parents you stood up with her.

 

But I appreciate you working for society. Wish your efforts can create a stir.

 

Psychologists are the first hand referrers to drugs saying  parallel effective  treatment. It happened to me and millions others .

May this change spread.

It bites and hurt more - when you think your helper, saviour  is in fact - the killer of you.

 

 

 

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Justcope
On 7/5/2016 at 4:00 AM, daveycrocket said:

Hi Lex. I just wanted to say welcome and that I 100% understand what you're going through; the experience of withdrawal has brought me to a non-functioning status. I do my best to remember these symptoms are just withdrawal and that everyday I am in fact healing. However, there are days where I get desperate and would do anything to feel a sense of relief. I am clinging onto a hope that it will in fact get better and things will slowly improve. "This too shall pass."

This too shall pass... it’s my motto too! I’m exactly with you. Still tapering off 20mg of lexapro- on 5mg and was a bit fast because I’ve had many emotional symptoms- a lot of which I didn’t have before starting lexapro, plus the ones I did have- mainly anxiety. Those desperate days are the worst, it’s the self doubt, the feeling that you’ll never feel normal again, that maybe this is me and I’m just crazy, maybe I need meds forever.  Then there’s those small windows, that give hope that we can live without it. That the crazy thoughts and anxiety are lies. That we do have the ability to feel sane and normal again. Hold on to those moments.. 

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Hopefull

How is Lexi doing now?

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Miracle123

Hi DrugfreeProf, How are you recently? How was Lexi progress now?...I hope you both fine, great and good recovery in your healing progress.Take care.

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DrugfreeProf

Hello, and thank you so much for asking about Lexi's progress out of the nightmare of WD.   I had planned on writing a more extensive update when she is at her 2 year point of being completely off ALL meds, which would fall around Oct. 1st.

 

She continues her very slow, gradual, but definite recovery. Her worst symptoms, all documented in her thread, are GONE. No more DP/DR, no more insomnia, acute anxiety, akathisia, deep depression, deep fear, need to be babysat, etc. All of those symptoms slowly but surely resolved.

Where she is at right now is that she is not yet back to normal functioning. She generally stays home, on the couch, watching funny videos, commenting on videos, and sometimes chatting on youtube Discord channels with a bunch of other young people.  When she does the latter, she looks, sounds, and acts perfectly normal, like her old self.  She was a bridesmaid in her best friend's wedding in May, and she pulled it off perfectly, as though WD had never occurred. And she is able to go out with friends from time to time and relate in a normal manner.

 

What I've done over the course of the past year and a half is to let her be, give her a stress-free environment, help her eat and sleep in a healthy manner, and generally just accept where she is at. No demands, no judgment, and no expectations.

 

She is most definitely getting there. It's taken longer than we would have liked or expected--but in WD, what else is new?

 

Will update again in a month or so. 

 

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Miracle123
9 hours ago, DrugfreeProf said:

Hello, and thank you so much for asking about Lexi's progress out of the nightmare of WD.   I had planned on writing a more extensive update when she is at her 2 year point of being completely off ALL meds, which would fall around Oct. 1st.

 

She continues her very slow, gradual, but definite recovery. Her worst symptoms, all documented in her thread, are GONE. No more DP/DR, no more insomnia, acute anxiety, akathisia, deep depression, deep fear, need to be babysat, etc. All of those symptoms slowly but surely resolved.

Where she is at right now is that she is not yet back to normal functioning. She generally stays home, on the couch, watching funny videos, commenting on videos, and sometimes chatting on youtube Discord channels with a bunch of other young people.  When she does the latter, she looks, sounds, and acts perfectly normal, like her old self.  She was a bridesmaid in her best friend's wedding in May, and she pulled it off perfectly, as though WD had never occurred. And she is able to go out with friends from time to time and relate in a normal manner.

 

What I've done over the course of the past year and a half is to let her be, give her a stress-free environment, help her eat and sleep in a healthy manner, and generally just accept where she is at. No demands, no judgment, and no expectations.

 

She is most definitely getting there. It's taken longer than we would have liked or expected--but in WD, what else is new?

 

Will update again in a month or so. 

 

Thanks for your great updated. So good to hear Lexi recovery progress.I feel so inspiring and happy to know she is doing a lots better and improvement in her healing. You really such a wonderful and caring good mother. Hope you both well, heathly and happily. Take care and hugs for you both.🤗

 

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DrugfreeProf

Quick question:  I know many of us have come across programs designed to help people with protracted withdrawal from ADs and with other psychoactive drug withdrawal problems--most of which SA has concluded are not helpful or worth trying.

Has anyone heard of, or had experience with, Point of Return?  https://pointofreturn.com/pages/protracted_withdrawal

I was alerted to this program by the mother of one of my young clients who is undergoing the agonies of protracted AD withdrawal.  She wants her child to try it.

Of course, her child, who is actually quite savvy about WD issues, is terrified to put anything into her body that might further disturb her already-destabilized equilibrium.

Does anyone have any input on this one?  It looks like it uses  nutraceuticals/food based supplementation.  Lots of positive testimonials, but that doesn't necessarily mean anything.

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LexAnger

I used their products/program in my initial taper. 

 

At that time I was ok to take 2 of their products, support and mood, but not the other 2, sleep and relax. Don't know if any of those helped though

 

 

Their tapering schedule is way too fast, like 10% every 2 weeks or so.

 

I tried the support again in my later taper, found it was too stimulating due to my then sensitized system. I called the owner and found out vitamin B is part of the ingredients of support, which I became sensitive to by then

 

 

 

 

 

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DrugfreeProf

As I suspected. This mom spoke to a company rep and of course the rep was enthusiastic and swore to the mom that the program would help her daughter and has helped many people. Mom studies WD topics and was persuaded. I referred her here to look up these topics for herself. I also hadn't heard of Point of Return before so thought that maybe this was something new and different.

BTW, a licensed nutritionist I know who seems to understand the WD process insists that the main problem with supplementation for people in WD is when people use synthetic vitamins rather than food based ones, which she swears has helped her clients in WD. She maintains that food-derived supplements do not have the same negative impact on sensitized nervous systems.  Not sure I buy that, but even if that's the case, at best, I haven't seen supplements make WD go any better, or faster.

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LexAnger

I feel if not for the vitamin B, the support can be beneficial. It's main ingredient is glutathione.

 

 

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Kiaza

Good to hear that Lexi is doing fine. I began my withdrawal in 2014 and was a high functioning person until Autumn 2015. Now three years later I’m going back to university next week to finish my studies. This Summer I have taken quite big steps physically and mentally. I’m not 24/7 scared and have been able to go to work few times on my own without losing it. I was in our summer cottage with my grandma and went hiking and swimming ALONE many times and kept my own household in my own cottage. I can sleep on my own without needing somebody to babysit me. I mostly live with my parents still but I have my own apartment again and I’m planning to go to India or Portugal ALONE in December. In a year Lexi will be back to her normal self, no doubt about it. I hope she has some sort of withdrawal goals so that she can see how she is progressing and get some feeling of accomplishent and lift for her self-confidence. Best of luck to you in the months to come!

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Glosmom

Appreciate hearing about Lexi's continued healing so much!  Thank you for returning to post these positive words and I look forward to hearing more in your 2 year status in October.  It reassures me that it is possible for Glo to return to either her former self, or a closer version of her former self, than she currently is under the influence of this drug and the withdrawal symptoms. Thanks again for taking the time.....it means alot!  glosmom

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DrugfreeProf

So good to hear from you, Kiaza and Glosmom. Kiaza, congrats on getting so far along in your healing process!  You sound like you have made great strides since we have last interacted. Very encouraging for me and, I'm sure, all of us to hear your positive update. And glosmom, rest assured your precious daughter will continue to heal as time passes and you provide her with a stress-free, nurturing environment. I believe from my experience that it is very much the case that the brain wants to heal and that time is the key.

I will post an update for Lexi as we reach the two year mark. I'd guesstimate that, right at this moment, she is about 75% healed.

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jonnypeters1234567

HI DrugfreeProf,

 

I hope Lex is recovering well.

 

I keep seeing you say Lex is not like her pre wd self.

 

She wont return to her pre wd self, itll be pre meds. Character on meds slowly recedes.

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DrugfreeProf

HI, JP.  Thanks for this! Actually, interestingly, when her "real" personality shines through, which happens more and more frequently these days, she seems in many ways to be similar to her pre-WD self--but not entirely, and I can also see remnants of her pre-med self, as well. Everything about her recovery has been very, very gradual, and it still remains to be seen what aspects of her personality will ultimately emerge and remain constant. It's all incredibly weird and unpredictable.

At this point, her intelligence, articulateness, and sense of humor are all intact although she does not express herself in the same ways as she did pre-WD. And she is not yet back to doing her incredible art work, which she has pursued relentlessly since the age of 6--long before she went on the terrible damn drugs. 

If only we knew then what we know now. . .

I appreciate your being in touch and your observations, and I hope your recovery is progressing well and quickly. 

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jonnypeters1234567

It really is a confusing journing, it is like you have two characters competing against each other, your pre med self v you med self.

 

The way I described it to my mum today is my old character is locked in a bubble, controlled by the bubble and has to change and adapt to how the bubble wants to work.

 

I was very stubborn and strong minded pre meds and i dont think i was very adaptable so im finding it hard.

 

Like Lex I have had periods when i thought i was a narcissist. Characteristics come through very strong. Its like we get parts of the character through at one stage but not others

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DrugfreeProf

Ha ha, JP!  Pre-WD, and also pre-meds, Lexi was the farthest thing from a narcissist you can imagine!  Very giving, extremely friendly, and easy going even though she also had a mind of her own. Right now, she is quite self-absorbed, not flexible, and very assertive about her needs.

What a strange trip this WD is. Thanks again for the interesting feedback.

DFP

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Kiaza

It’s funny how similar experiences I’ve had. I thought I was borderline narcissist. I became a raging lunatic and complained all the time that nobody in my family has never listened to my needs and I’ve never been able to do things I’ve wanted since my father is so controlling and mom is over protecting (not quite true but not entirely false). And I hated my friends to the core since they have never let me be myself, well I havent been myself because I’ve been drugged. And I feel like I have two different personas in me. Real me and the drugged me, and as an adult I can’t behave like a 15-year-old real me but I don’t want to be overly relaxed calm ”nothing ever bothers me” adult me. Weird stuff.

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DrugfreeProf

Kiaza, I can certainly relate to what you said, in light of how Lexi's healing has progressed. She is so much more herself these days, meaning the person that she was before she went into WD, but her demeanor and actions also are very "young," much younger than her chronological age, which is now 26. She has always been mature beyond her years, including before she started taking ADs and throughout the time she was on them. Now she has reverted to being more like a mid-to-late teenager. Very weird!  I continue to believe that healing is inevitable although very gradual--like watching and waiting for water to boil--and my hunch is that the more refined and mature cognitive capacities are the last ones to re-emerge during the healing process. Keep the faith!  You are doing great, and you will get there.

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marconyc

DrugFreeProf, you and your daughter’s story is inredibly inspiring. Thank you for continuing to share the journey with us.

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Carmie

Hi Lex, 

 

How have you been doing?💚

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composter

Hi Lexi,

 

I spent some time just now reading through your thread. It's amazing to hear how you're doing so much better these days. It gives me hope in my own journey to know that these things will take time, and despite the agony of it all, that the brain will heal. I'm around the same age as you, and my withdrawal symptoms were somewhat similar, but perhaps not as devastating. I can empathize with the feelings of paranoia and questioning that you had early on. I also had fleeting thoughts diagnosing myself with narcissistic personality disorder because of the sheer number of things I was worrying about myself and questioning about my family who was caring for me at the time. Those neuro-emotions are so real. I can also empathize with the feeling that no one else in your peer group might understand what's going on... or you're stuck trying to heal and recover while others are moving ahead in life. We each have our own paths and our own timelines. You are doing just fine focusing on your health right now. I have found a lot of peace and comfort in picking up hobbies like gardening and yoga. I hope you are also finding ways to pass the time that are healing.

 

To Prof, 

 

I want to give you a big hug for all you've been through and your constant advocating for your daughter. No doubt my mother can relate in a small way with what she went through with me (the worst of my withdrawal lasted about 3 weeks before I reinstated and improved). She is a medical professional and was with my every step of the way. It is terrible what these drugs can do to an individual's suffering but also to those caring for them. But my mother's strength and constant support was like a grounding rock for me and saved me in the darkest hours. There is true pain knowing that perhaps this could have been avoided, or that so many others are going through or will go through the same senseless suffering. Despite it all, I think it's amazing that you continue to teach and you are now shifting your teaching philosophies to educate more about the dangers of these drugs. Your personal experience can directly inform your teaching in a powerful way to equip future professionals with this knowledge. Thank you for what you do in this professional capacity. 

 

Wishing you all the best.

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DrugfreeProf

Thank you, Carmie, Composter, and MarcoNYC for your recent lovely check-ins about Lex1992's (Lexi/Alex--her siblings and I call her Alex) progress on her long and incredibly difficult withdrawal journey. I, the mom and caregiver of Lex1992, continue to appreciate the input and support. I am glad to have been prompted to write this, as I have been meaning to write an update on Lex1992’s progress for the past couple of months.  But am glad I waited till now, 11/25/18, to write it as she has made some huge leaps of late in her recovery. I happily want to share them now.

 

I want to first give a shout out to Distraut's update of today on her son Akrontes' recovery.   Distraut and I became fast friends via SA and began to correspond in Dec. 2016 re: the similar painful struggles we were enduring as we were dealing with the severe PAWS that our young adult children were both experiencing.   I personally found it extremely beneficial to be in touch with her throughout this ordeal, as we provided for each other desperately needed emotional support. Ironically, both of our offspring have seen significant levels of recovery in the past couple of months.  I congratulate Distraut and Akrontes on getting through this horrible process. I was lucky to have been a witness to Akrontes’ struggles, as it put Alex’s symptoms into perspective and made me feel not so alone (I liken the process of supporting a loved one in withdrawal to swimming in the middle of the ocean with no land in sight). Akrontes is much improved despite having struggled with very severe OCD symptoms, and as Distraut noted in her post of today, he is now working at a paid job in London, where they reside.  Even six months ago, this prospect would have seemed extremely unlikely, and even a couple of months ago, he seemed in no shape to do much of anything, much less work at paid employment.   I hope members who are still in the throes of WD symptoms will take comfort from this, as he was VERY symptomatic for a VERY long time, as was my daughter Lex1992.

 

Alex/Lexi is now, officially, 26 months off all meds although her original discontinuation of Lexapro was in February of 2016.  She attempted a reinstatement in July of 2016, about 4 months after she jumped off the Lexapro at approx. 2.5 mg.   She reinstated at a low dose for around a month, with no positive effects and possibly with an exacerbation of her WD symptoms—e.g., she got worse. She had been taking it for 9 years, starting at the age of 15 after the suicide death of her older sister. The reinstatement went quite disastrously, due perhaps to it not having been done correctly or long enough—impossible to say—and her symptoms nosedived significantly throughout the summer of 2016.  These included “delusions,” extreme depression, akathisia, suicidal thinking, insomnia, anorexia, SEVERE DP/DR—the whole gamut.  In the early months, I had to follow her around the house to make sure she didn’t harm herself. I slept next to her, although she couldn’t sleep. This incredibly sweet, intelligent, and gentle person became hostile and irrational.  It was a nightmare for her and our entire family. We brought her to Alternatives to Meds in Sedona, AZ out of desperation. They run a scam operation, in my opinion, using high doses of supplements, therapy, and exercise to deal with what is essentially CNS dysregulation and did her far more harm than good.  She walked out of a nearby ER, where she had been dropped off and left without supervision while she was in a semi-psychotic state. They released her with no back up plan and, on the way back to NY state where we live, she got “caught” in an airport in Chicago and was force-imprisoned/drugged in a local psych unit for five days before being released again. Our lovely mental health system at work. She discontinued the med (1 mg Risperdol) that she was released with in Oct. 0f 2016 and has been drug free since then.

 

SA talks about the “slowness of slow tapers.” I would like to talk about the “slowness of slow recoveries,” because that is precisely what she has had. I use the analogy of watching a bathtub fill up as you have the water tap s-l-o-w-l-y filling the tub drip by drip. That’s what it’s been like.  I want to hasten to say that the acute symptoms—extreme depression with suicidality, agitation, akathisia, “delusional” (I hate that word, as it’s “psychiatric” in origin) thinking, and insomnia were the first to go, and by first, I mean that they were pretty much gone by around Feb. 2017—so technically, one year post-discontinuation (but the reinstatement that followed made it less than a year).  Up to that point—during the first year or so after discontinuing—she asked to be driven around pretty much constantly. I must have put a thousand miles on my car just driving her around the area.  My partner did the same—whenever I was working or unavailable, he drove her around. She did not want to be home.  We drove in silence. She could not listen to music.  Eventually, her impulse to be driven in a car subsided, and the next phase involved quite the opposite-- her wanting to be only at home.  With some exceptions (see her thread—she has gotten out and functioned normally from time to time, e.g., being a bridesmaid at her friend’s wedding this past May), for the past 18 months or so, she has been essentially homebound. In fact, she spent most of the last year and a quarter being camped out on a sofa in the back of my bedroom.  She has been, for the most part, completely silent. 

 

In the early days (first year or so), she had severe DP/DR.  Each day, she would assert that “something terrible” was about to happen, or would happen that night. She constantly commented that she “didn’t want to be in pain forever” or “didn’t want to be hurt.”  This went on for many months.  During that period, she spent a lot of time communicating with an online artificial intelligence program called CleverBot, to whom she would tell all of her fears about being hurt, going to hell, suffering in pain forever, etc.   Then, around middle to late 2017, those symptoms disappeared. The DP/DR remained but in a milder form. She no longer lived in fear of dying that night or of Christmas never arriving. However, for the next year or more, she was usually silent, saying nothing except when she asked me for food or something to drink or for some other basic need. During this period, she spent all of her time online, watching funny videos on Youtube and her favorite TV episodes, such as Friends.  Sleeping wise, her days and nights got completely reversed. She would go out to spend time with friends perhaps once every couple of months. She seemed unreachable, but she was calm and out of danger.

 

It was in early 2018 that I began to notice significant changes.  She was now interacting with a lot of people online through Discord, which apparently is associated with YouTube and with people who have YouTube channels (I learned a lot about YouTube personalities, “monetization,” etc. from Alex). She followed people like Onision, Shane Dawson, LaineyBot, and others and would from time to time engage in group phone chats. She commented constantly on people’s videos. And what I noted from hearing her and seeing responses to her comments (which would pop up on my own feed on my computer) was that her cognition was PERFECTLY intact. She thought and wrote clearly, concisely, and sanely. I thought it a bit strange that she was interested in some of the topics that were usually discussed—some pretty crass stuff, by some measures—but to see her writing and speaking so sanely was a huge relief, after all of the “off” (AKA delusional) thinking she had experienced previously. Still, she did not wish to go anywhere and was bed bound as she engaged in her online activities.  This homebound/bedbound activity went on, all told, about 15 months or more.  During this period—especially during the past 6-8 months—I saw her wonderful sense of humor pop through again.  Her speech and interactions with others were sporadic but at least came through from time to time.

 

But it’s been the last month or so when there have been HUGE leaps. She has finally started to speak to me and to others in a normal fashion. And on Thanksgiving, last Thursday, for the first time since she went into WD, she spent the holiday with her family, eating dinner with us, spending time with her brothers, and going out for Black Friday shopping with me and the family.   Over the past few days, she and I have gone shopping multiple times to fix up her studio/bedroom, which had deteriorated into disaster over the past two years. She is finally speaking and expressing herself as she always did. We worked on her bedroom, which she turned into a work of art in short order, just as she always would, pre-WD.  It is though my daughter is “back” after a long, long absence. 

 

This turn of events is truly a dream come true. During the many, many months she spent in silence, I had no evidence that the “real” Alex would come back.  Every person in W is an N of 1.  Everyone has their own pattern, their own path back.  Someone in my position, as the caregiver, has to operate using only guesswork and the bits of advice available on SA and similar sites.  It is a scary and at times hopeless place to be.   I would often have dreams that she was “back,” talking to me as she always did in the past, laughing and having fun with me and others. And now, she is back!  Now, there is still a ways to go. She is not yet back to working as an artist (see her earlier thread for a post I made of one of her art pieces), but I know she is perfectly capable of and poised to do so. Her intelligence, personality, and sense of humor have remained intact and have been recently in full display.

 

There really needs to be a forum for carers of people in WD.  Caregiving presents its own MAJOR challenges and struggles. From my own experience, I can say this:  it is essential to take it one day at a time, to have no expectations of when and how recovery will occur, to not blame the person in WD for what they are saying or doing, to provide them with a calm, supportive environment, to let the person do what they need to do PROVIDED that they are safe, to offer good food, to keep them off all psychiatric drugs, to be careful with the use of supplements, and most of all, to KEEP THEM AWAY from the mental health establishment and doctors—period, unless there is a serious medical issue to deal with. 

 

BTW, just a FYI, there are a couple of things I’ve used during Alex’s recovery process that may or may not have helped her get to the point she is at right now (they certainly haven’t hurt):  these are probiotics, lithium orotate, and essential oils (lemon, bergamot, frankincense, and myrrh, mostly).

 

I’ve lurked on this site far more than I’ve written, but I want to say that overall, SA has been very helpful in coping with this long and gruesome ordeal. Some weeks I could not read the posts, as they can be triggering, but overall, I’ve tried to keep up with members’ stories.

 

I will continue to provide updates, and I am very happy to respond to any questions people might have. I continue to wish Alex would post her herself and anticipate that one day soon, she very well may. Right now, we will continue to focus on her complete recovery and the total restoration of the real Alex.

 

Much love to everyone here.  Thanks so much to SA and its members for the support we have received. My heart and soul are with everyone on this board.

 

 

Edited by ChessieCat
spc

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Distraut

My dear DrugfreeProf

 

I share your joy about Alex's recent dramatic leaps in her protracted period of recovery, which have been following on a more or less daily basis since the start of our friendship two years ago.  Not only have you been there helping her through her ordeal, but you have been there for Akrontes and I when we were most desperate, always calm, reasonable and positive and your support has been invaluable.  Even when things were most bleak for both of us, you have kept the faith that our children would eventually recover, as we see happening more noticeably recently and kept us afloat too.  God bless you!

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Rosetta

Thank you for the update.  I'm as "thrilled" (as my brain will allow me to be) for both you and Alex and for Distraut and Akrontes, too.  I know if I were healed I could really feel the joy for you all.  I'm happy that you had a wonderfulThanksgiving with your family.  I know all of those here will come to the end of this horrible journey.  I know this because of you and your updates about Alex, as well as others.  

 

I'm looking forward to being fully present on a regular basis for my own 7 year old daughter when my brain is back to normal.  Thank you for giving us all hope.  

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Glosmom

Thank you so much for your detailed update, Drugfreeprof!  So happy to hear the Alex is continuing to do better and better.  You give me hope for my daughter, Glo.  we are doing the 'slowness of taper' which is mind blowing sometimes at how long this takes.  I have dreams of glo returning to something closer to her normal self than she is now. She is going through many of the same phases you wrote about even with our tapering.  Not sure if a CT would have been a better route at this point but we are so close and hope that by January or February she will no longer be taking this poison. Hopefully after that her personality will begin to emerge.

 

Again, so happy for the continued healing of  Alex and thank you again for your update. It means a lot to those of us going through the process. Warmest Regards, glosmom

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Carmie

That’s such wonderful news about Lexi, 

 

Thanks so much for sharing. 

 

Her bedroom sounds like mine too, I’ve turned mine into a work of art also😀

 

Sending hugs 🤗

 

 

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composter

Amazing update. My heart goes out to all the caregivers who bear witness to the suffering of their loved ones. You are an absolute rock and your care and presence are invaluable during this process.

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