abster728: Zoloft Taper

[abster728]

Today was just plain awful!!!!! My eyes will not focus, the feeling off my ears being full and the awful pressure in my eyes and not to mention the feeling of terrible anxiety. I hope this mess clears before tomorrow I start a new job, granted it's just a temp position right now but it can lead into full time possibly.

[abster728]

Anyone have any good ideas for insomnia?! ????????????????????

[abster728]

Well finally today after reinstating 2 days ago back to original dose of 100mg I am feeling better. The brain fog has lifted and the tightness in my ear and head are gone. It's at times like these I feel I will never get off this medication. I feel like crap on the meds and crap off the meds. This is not okay :/ How could have I been so trusting at such a young age. That exactly it... I "trusted" my doctor and at the time my pediatrician thought he was doing what was right. Panic Disorder in a child was not known then he was treating my symptoms the best he knew and I don't blame him because he refered me to a psychiatrist and that is where the problem was she kept prescribing and upping my dose. Never treating the problem just drugging me. I do thank my lucky stars that I never gave in to poly drugging. I lived my life on 2 drugs and it's all I have ever known. About 5 years ago I tapered off Valium after 14 years of use. My regular doctor at the time added Metoprolol and that pretty much stopped my anxiety attacks. I still take metoprolol and I think it helps. I have been a pharmacy technician for 9 years and I see everyday people falling victim to the use of these so called "safe" drugs. It's really heart breaking... you go to the doctor thinking they are helping you and some do genuinely care out their oath they took but some are just like the kickbacks so much and these things the drug reps tell these doctors boggles my mind. Honestly as horrible as this sounds I would rather have anxiety than to feel numb. At least with Anxiety you feel something granted it's pure hell but at least you feel. There really was no point to this post, honestly it's the first time my thoughts have been clear enough to actually stare at the screen an type. Their is so much built up emotion in me and bitterness towards not being able to get off this medication. It's robbed me of a lot. I don't do drugs I have never even smoked and I don't even drink and to know I am "addicted" to this medication is so heartbreaking.. all these years I have just ignored the thoughts of being on the medication and just have been a robot living day to day. I want my life back that those drug so desperately took from me at such a young age. I guess today I had a window where I could describe how I feel and actually feel the pain as I was typing this. Anyways if anyone ever needs to talk and have someone there for them please don't hesitate to message me. We are all in this together!!! Sorry I started rambling and the words just kept flowing.... it's been too long????