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NaturalBorn

 

naturalborn-successful-story

 

hi i'm new at this forum and i'm brazilian, 20 years old, started effexor when i was 18 for depression, stayed on it for 8 or 10 months, with almost no side effects, after this tried going cold turkey , since then have been dealing with all possible kinds of side effects, i tried reinstatement on january of this year (after 4 months of wd) obviously didn't worked, stayed on them for more 5 months, went to rehab.

 

tapered effexor there and started trazadone and seroquel. now i've been taking 150 mg of trazadone and 25 mg of seroquel, was kind of "ok" so tried to reduce trazadone to 100 mgs, wasn't able to sleep for 3 days, went back on 150 mgs, and added 2 mg of klonopin to use when needed, but since that abruptly quitting of effexor i haven't been the same, dealed

 

with EXTREME anxiety (never was a problem before), SEVERE imsonia, sometimes 5 days without any sleep, chronic pain and numbess and poor coordination on the right side of my body. the left side seems ok, i have no idea why. derealization, poor memory, poor concentration, diahrrea, akastisia, poor stress tolerance, emotional numbess, brain zaps and brain fog, anyway i have been dealing with pretty much all the symtoms you can come up with, pretty hopeless, desesperated, regreted, scared, feeling like it will never be the same.

 

i really want to know what you guys think, is there any hope for me ever being the same again?

Edited by ChessieCat
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nz11

Welcome Fernando

So glad you found sa.

While you wait patiently in the que you may like to take a moment to do a drug signature noting doses timeframes start and stop and tapering methods if any.

 

nz11

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NaturalBorn

first of all i'm brazilian so my english is not that good but i will try my best. I started effexor around 2014 for depression, can't remember exactly when i started taking it, but i started with 37,5 and quickly went up to 300 mg, i noticed very minimal side effects, but i didn't liked the idea of taking them, so after 8 or 10 months being on it, i decided to quit, had no idea this would be a problem (was no longer seeing any doctor), i did it could turkey and the symtoms began to show after probably 3 weeks at least that i noticed, i was VERY agitated, probably hypomaniac, with delusions of greatness, and with the right side of my body completely numbed, i thought that it would be temporary, but then i started reading about the accute withdrawal off effexor and i had all the symtoms listed and maybe even more, this went on for 4 months, where i quit my job, quit college, became really antisocial, it was an unstopabble "wave" of 4 months and i was getting really worried, then in january pretty much hopelles i started again on them and slowly went up to 300 mg again, even knowing that reinstatement shouldn't work but i really couldn't live like that. it didn't nothing for me, all the symptoms were still going on. so in march of this years (i'm 20 years old and live with my parents) my parents got sick of me doing nothing with my life and sended me to rehab, there i started trazadone 150 mg and seroquel 25 mg, and tapered effexor again, this time i didn't felt the withdrawal from effexor, but obviously i was dealing with symtoms from the older attempt of quitting effexor. but this new meds made me sleep and i did some physical therapy in there too, so the numbess and poor coordination got a little better, so i got out of there after 2 months, and was a little bit better, but please keep in mind that i wasn't the same not even close since that time i stopped effexor, but i think i was in some kind of "window", then my doctor cutted the trazadone to 50 mg and after 2 weeks on 50 mg of trazadone and 25 mg of seroquel, the "wave" hitted again REALLY HARD couldn't sleep for 3 days at all, so i went back to him and he reinstated the trazadone on 150. so now i'm taking trazadone 150mg and seroquel 25mg and i'm feeling about 50% of my self, i think the accute phase is gone, because i no longer have depersonalization, and the general crazy/madness that i had in those 4 months. but know i'm dealing with EXTREME poor concentration, and memory, really stressed out really easy and with my right side of my body in some kind of paresthesia or dysthonia or both i don't know. pretty much hopelles at this point, i have no idea what to do, and probably this topic is confusing, this just show how messed up i am. really i just wan't to talk with you guys, i'm pretty sure i missed a lot of details, so feel free to ask anything or just chat.

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scallywag

NaturalBorn -- Welcome to Surviving Antidepressants (SA)
 
I hope you'll find the information in the SA forums helpful for your situation. I'm sorry that you are in the position that you need the information, but am glad that you found us.

 

People do recover from withdrawal from SSRIs/SNRIs and other psychiatric medications. You will too.

A request: Would you summarize your history in a signature -- drugs, doses, dates, and discontinuations & reinstatements, in the last 12-18 months particularly? Any drugs prior to that can just be listed with start and stop years. Please put your withdrawal history in signature
 
Your suspicion is correct -- The symptoms you're experiencing are the result of your cold turkey off a high dose of Effexor. Effexor is a difficult drug to discontinue, especially "cold turkey." You can read more about symptoms in these two topics here at Surviving Antidepressants (SA):
What is withdrawal syndrome
Glenmullen’s withdrawal symptom list  
 

... Just to repeat, people do recover from withdrawal from SSRIs/SNRIs and other psychiatric medications.

You are currently taking Trazodone, Seroquel, and Klonopin.  When a someone is taking multiple medications, we ask that that you post an interactions report.  Follow the link below to get your report. Just select the text, copy it and paste it in a post here.
Drugs-dot-com Drugs Interactions Checker.
 
These threads are also relevant for you:
Tips for tapering off trazodone (Desyrel)
Tips for tapering off Seroquel (quetiapine)

As you may know Klonopin is a benzodiazepine drug. What your doctor may not have told you is that people can become dependent on a benzo drug very quickly. You currently have a prescription for 2 mg "as needed."

A question: How frequently have you been taking Klonopin (clonazepam)?

 

This is YOUR introduction topic -- the place for you to ask questions, record symptoms, share your progress, and connect with other members of the SA community.

 

I've given you a lot to read and a couple of things to do.  If you have to pick just one, please post a signature that lists your medication and withdrawal history. 

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Altostrata

Welcome, NaturalBorn.

 

At what time of day do you take your drugs? Please put ALL the drugs you take in the Drug Interactions Checker http://www.drugs.com/drug_interactions.html
and copy and paste the results in this topic.
 

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NaturalBorn

Using traZODone together with QUEtiapine can increase the risk of an irregular heart rhythm that may be serious and potentially life-threatening, although it is a rare side effect. You may be more susceptible if you have a heart condition called congenital long QT syndrome, other cardiac diseases, conduction abnormalities, or electrolyte disturbances (for example, magnesium or potassium loss due to severe or prolonged diarrhea or vomiting). Talk to your doctor if you have any questions or concerns. Your doctor may already be aware of the risks, but has determined that this is the best course of treatment for you and has taken appropriate precautions and is monitoring you closely for any potential complications. You should seek immediate medical attention if you develop sudden dizziness, lightheadedness, fainting, shortness of breath, or heart palpitations during treatment with these medications, whether together or alone. It is important to tell your doctor about all other medications you use, including vitamins and herbs. Do not stop using any medications without first talking to your doctor.

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NaturalBorn

Welcome, NaturalBorn.

 

At what time of day do you take your drugs? Please put ALL the drugs you take in the Drug Interactions Checker http://www.drugs.com/drug_interactions.html

and copy and paste the results in this topic.

 

i take them before bed

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NaturalBorn

NaturalBorn -- Welcome to Surviving Antidepressants (SA)

 

I hope you'll find the information in the SA forums helpful for your situation. I'm sorry that you are in the position that you need the information, but am glad that you found us.

 

People do recover from withdrawal from SSRIs/SNRIs and other psychiatric medications. You will too.

 

A request: Would you summarize your history in a signature -- drugs, doses, dates, and discontinuations & reinstatements, in the last 12-18 months particularly? Any drugs prior to that can just be listed with start and stop years. Please put your withdrawal history in signature

 

Your suspicion is correct -- The symptoms you're experiencing are the result of your cold turkey off a high dose of Effexor. Effexor is a difficult drug to discontinue, especially "cold turkey." You can read more about symptoms in these two topics here at Surviving Antidepressants (SA):

What is withdrawal syndrome

Glenmullen’s withdrawal symptom list  

 

... Just to repeat, people do recover from withdrawal from SSRIs/SNRIs and other psychiatric medications.

You are currently taking Trazodone, Seroquel, and Klonopin.  When a someone is taking multiple medications, we ask that that you post an interactions report.  Follow the link below to get your report. Just select the text, copy it and paste it in a post here.

Drugs-dot-com Drugs Interactions Checker.

 

These threads are also relevant for you:

Tips for tapering off trazodone (Desyrel)

Tips for tapering off Seroquel (quetiapine)

 

As you may know Klonopin is a benzodiazepine drug. What your doctor may not have told you is that people can become dependent on a benzo drug very quickly. You currently have a prescription for 2 mg "as needed."

A question: How frequently have you been taking Klonopin (clonazepam)?

 

This is YOUR introduction topic -- the place for you to ask questions, record symptoms, share your progress, and connect with other members of the SA community.

 

I've given you a lot to read and a couple of things to do.  If you have to pick just one, please post a signature that lists your medication and withdrawal history. 

thanks for saying this i really hope i get better, i can't face the idea that it might take years... i'm so scared, feeling like a victim, wish i could skip 5 years of my life just to see if it will be better... right now it's awful...  i jus't dont know man i'm freaking out a little bit today, getting my hope sucked away. i REALLY am in that stage where i'm hopelss i'm afraid it might get worst with time i don't know man i wish i had someone to talk about this

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NaturalBorn

Does the time line that you used the drug really influences how long tje wd can last? When i first stopped effexor i was only using it for 8 or 10 months and the wd lenght seemed out of proportion, what i want to know is, can you suffer from wd for more time then the time that you used the drug? Also does being younger will make any difference on my recpver? I'm 20

Edited by scallywag
merged "Timeline and age" topic in Symptoms

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NaturalBorn

Also, tje fact that i went cold turkey and just 4 montjs later reinstated do you guys think i made a mistake? I didn't felt amy healing in those 4 months. Maybe i screwed up even more fpr trying reinstatememt so long after?

Edited by scallywag
merged "Timeline and age" topic in Symptoms

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scallywag

I've moved your post to the Introductions Forum so that more people will see your question and because your questions are about your situation.

 

It's difficult to predict how long withdrawal will last. Some people have withdrawal symptoms for months after a single dose of a medication or after taking one for a week. Some people who have taken medication for years have symptoms for only a few weeks.

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NaturalBorn

Yes I recovered from my bad withdrawal symptoms after tapering off Effexor XR in 2004/5. I would say that the intense crying sessions for no reason improved and disappeared over 3-4 weeks. They were my worst withdrawal symptom. I did have some brain zaps but they resolved in the same time.

 

My dose was always on the low end of the prescribing range. I don't recall ever going above 75 mg.

good to hear... i'm feeling hopelles man... never heard of anyone going cold turkey from 300 mgs and being alive to tell, i even me being on them for 8 months or something i recall that for 4 months i felt over 50 symptoms, do you think that it's normal me having paresthesia for almost a year now? i can't even play guitar anymore.... idk man i feel like i'm loosing it

Edited by scallywag
moved from scallywag's intro

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NaturalBorn

(ignore my english, i'm brazilian) hi you guys, i'm just going crazy here and want to know what you guys think, is it possible that my body is healing from the effexor withdrawal if i'm on 2 more drugs now? (trazadone 150 and seroquel 50) or am i just stuck in time? never thought life could get this bad, i'm having HORRIBLE cognitive decline, people at work explain the same thing to me 10 times and i still can't do it... also the total loss of coordination and paresthesia is just driving me mad... this has being going on forever since that old attemp to quit effexor 300mgs cold turkey last year, other symptoms come and go, but this never gets easier... should i consider it permanent? also i'm taking seroquel 50mgs (i thought it was 25 but it is 50actually), and i heard that antypsychotis can really cause some movement disorders that are permanent such as tardive dysthenia or something... can this mess up my body from healing? i'm really afraid here guys... i use to play guitar now i can't even hold a pick...going nutts need some help, this is just to many symptoms... i heard that people was uncapable of working for years after paxil of effexor wd. and this is driving me crazy, i'm only 20 years old, never had a real job, tried college but only lasted 6 months and my grades made it impossible to go on, teachers actually thought i was some kind of retard, this is impossible... i also did a lot of recreational drugs while on effexor and after and i jsut don't know what is causing what, anybody plase just say something i can't go on like this...

Edited by scallywag
merged from topic started in symptoms forum

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NaturalBorn

Does anybody ever met one person or heard abput someone getting 100% FULLY recovered? And i mean without any kind of residual effects? Just totally fully recovered? To the point they feel like they never used any drug? I read sucess stories but everybody said even 7 years or more they still have little even that REALLY small symptoms of wd. I would love the idea of being TOTTALLY recovered, even if that takes me 20 years or something... like i just read this succes story where a guy says that 7 years later he is recovered but is more anxious then he was before meds, and this just makes me sad...

Edited by scallywag
merged topic started in symptoms

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scallywag

NB -- I've moved your questions to your introduction topic.

 

The damage is unlikely to be permanent. Your recovery to 100% may be longer than you'd like A cold-turkey stop of any psych drug risks an extended period of withdrawal syndrome which includes the cognitive symptoms you're experiencing.

 

It's unfortunate that doctors who prescribe these drugs don't understand that withdrawal symptoms are a risk without proper tapering and don't know how to advise a proper taper.

 

You asked about people who have recovered completely.  Have you looked in our Success Stories forum?

 

GiaK, a moderator, has recovered from long exposure to multiple medications. Check her website at beyondmeds.com.

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NaturalBorn

NB -- I've moved your question about people who have recovered completely.  Have you looked in our Success Stories forum?

 

GiaK, a moderator, has recovered from long exposure to multiple medications. Check her website at beyondmeds.com.

ok thanks, i will, but just a question where is that topic? i can't find it

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scallywag

The words "Success story" are a link. Just click on it.

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Henosis

Just wanted to add that your English is excellent for a Portuguese speaker.

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ravijaua

Man these doctors just keep doing this all AROUND THE WORLD.

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ravijaua

First of all you were on Effexor for only a short time. I think withdrawal is usually worse but not always if you are on the med longer because that gives the serotonin receptors more time to downregulate. Since you were on it not too long, you should recover faster.

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tntd

Unfortunately everyone is different and there is no way to tell how long withdrawal will last regardless of the amount of time you took it. As Scallywag stated above some people take these meds for years and heal within weeks while others take them for a very short time and it takes months to years to recover. No one knows why.

 

Regardless we will be here to give support and encouragement. We will all heal in our own time. 

 

Hugs

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Rockingchaircat

 

Yes I recovered from my bad withdrawal symptoms after tapering off Effexor XR in 2004/5. I would say that the intense crying sessions for no reason improved and disappeared over 3-4 weeks. They were my worst withdrawal symptom. I did have some brain zaps but they resolved in the same time.

 

My dose was always on the low end of the prescribing range. I don't recall ever going above 75 mg.

good to hear... i'm feeling hopelles man... never heard of anyone going cold turkey from 300 mgs and being alive to tell, i even me being on them for 8 months or something i recall that for 4 months i felt over 50 symptoms, do you think that it's normal me having paresthesia for almost a year now? i can't even play guitar anymore.... idk man i feel like i'm loosing it

 

It's been well over a year since the last of my antidepressant, and I'm STILL getting parathesia in the usual spots. It's been lightening up, but I'm still getting it.  Normal? Define normal...we all have a tough road to walk.  I've felt like I've losing it for almost the entire withdrawal. You just hold onto it.  You've survived 100% of all of your previous bad days. Hold on for one more.

Edited by scallywag
moved from scallywag's intro

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NaturalBorn

 

 

Yes I recovered from my bad withdrawal symptoms after tapering off Effexor XR in 2004/5. I would say that the intense crying sessions for no reason improved and disappeared over 3-4 weeks. They were my worst withdrawal symptom. I did have some brain zaps but they resolved in the same time.

 

My dose was always on the low end of the prescribing range. I don't recall ever going above 75 mg.

good to hear... i'm feeling hopelles man... never heard of anyone going cold turkey from 300 mgs and being alive to tell, i even me being on them for 8 months or something i recall that for 4 months i felt over 50 symptoms, do you think that it's normal me having paresthesia for almost a year now? i can't even play guitar anymore.... idk man i feel like i'm loosing it

 

It's been well over a year since the last of my antidepressant, and I'm STILL getting parathesia in the usual spots. It's been lightening up, but I'm still getting it.  Normal? Define normal...we all have a tough road to walk.  I've felt like I've losing it for almost the entire withdrawal. You just hold onto it.  You've survived 100% of all of your previous bad days. Hold on for one more.

 

yeah man, it's the time factor that scares me out... i'm only 20 years old, so i'm loosing a lot of my youth do to this, this weekend i pretty much just doped myself with klonopin,  beer and hash. didn't left my room since fryday, i actually thought today was saturday lol i just don't know what else to do... i wish so bad that i would just die, SO BAD, i'm not thinking about killing myself or anything, in fact i have almost zero emotions, except for fear and agony.... today i heard someone entering my house and wished so bad that was a murderer. this is too much for me, i have no libido, horrible cognitive issues and paresthesia, this didn't showed any sign of improvement in one year.... if this is the way i'm going to live, i rather just die.... if i was an old man, with family and stable financial situation, i'b probably be ok with that, cuz life sucks anyway....but i'm just freaking 20, i don't know guys someone should go to jail for this, this is not fair at all

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NaturalBorn

** moved from Ketiperri's Intro

 

Yes, symptoms of any type can arise a year after your last dose.
 
We need you to create a signature that has your medication and withdrawal history.

A request: Would you summarize your history in a signature -- drugs, doses, dates, and discontinuations & reinstatements, in the last 12-18 months particularly? Any drugs prior to that can just be listed with start and stop years.

Please put your withdrawal history in signature

If you are using a phone, please read these two posts for detailed instructions:
Post number 8;

Post number 9

is it true that one year later you can't get new symptoms, and more severe ones? like psychosis? like i thought that what you expirienced during the accute withdrawal was the worst that it could get, plus can accute withdrawal last more then 6 months? and after accute withdrawal, is it possible that you go BACK into expiriencing symptons of the accute phase? i heard one woman saying that after 13 months off lexapro she started having brain zaps AGAIN.... and she told that the was sure that she was back into accute withdrawal... so if i survive let's say, the first 6 months of withdrawal or the first year, is it possible that NEW synmptoms can show up? OR that they just get more severe then ever?

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Daisy1

Hi Naturalborn, From what I've read on here, people's symptons change quite often during withdrawal. You may find one sympton improves or goes away, then to fi d a new sympton develops, it is part of the healing process. We are all different though, everybody's journey through this is younique.

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scallywag

NaturalBorn, your youth is to your advantage.

 

It seems that reading about others' challenges in withdrawal is a source of worry for you. It might be a good idea to take a break from reading about other peoples' symptoms.

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NaturalBorn

NaturalBorn, your youth is to your advantage.

 

It seems that reading about others' challenges in withdrawal is a source of worry for you. It might be a good idea to take a break from reading about other peoples' symptoms.

yeah i agree on that one, but i'm just worried about if it can get any worst, i mean the idea of having psychosis just freaks me out, because if i go psychotic i'll be put on multiple drugs again and then all the progress is over...i'm just thinking can it get worst after 1 year or a long period? I know that i'm being annoying, but... plus how can my age be on my advantage?

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Daisy1

It's highly unlikely you will go into psychosis, a lot of people fear they will during withdrawa. That's what it is fear. Age is on your side as your body has the ability to repair itself more quickly.

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scallywag

NB if it gets worse, you'll find a way of dealing with it.  One of the best things you can do is to keep track of your symptoms on paper. I use an Excel spreadsheet based on the one in this topic: Glenmullen’s withdrawal symptom list

 

I added a row at the top, so it's easy to find, for "didn't feel like tracking or forgot." That's a useful indicator too.

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ChessieCat

Worrying about "what might be" is a massive waste of mental energy and causes a lot of stress.  And look at it this way, even if you made "x" number of plans of how you were going to deal with the situation, you may need plan "x+1".  Besides, the situation you are worrying about may not actually end up happening.

 

Acceptance


Acceptance and Mindfulness

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NaturalBorn

Worrying about "what might be" is a massive waste of mental energy and causes a lot of stress.  And look at it this way, even if you made "x" number of plans of how you were going to deal with the situation, you may need plan "x+1".  Besides, the situation you are worrying about may not actually end up happening.

 

Acceptance

Acceptance and Mindfulness

what worries me the most is that this withdrawal don't seem to go better with time, i mean it changes, but never improves, this just sucks the hope out of me... for an example, i see people saying "i was sleeping 2 hours a day in the first month, then in the second month 3 hours a day," an so on..this is not the case with me, at the fourth month of withdrawal all the symptoms hitted me HARD, that's what made me go back on effexor in the beggining of this year, if i could see just one linear and solid improvement with time, i wouldn't be so hopelless and scared, sometimes every cell of my body is telling me that i WILL not recover properly of this... like i was on the drug for 8 months and the withdrawal keeped getting worst until it hitted rock bottom AT THE 4TH month. what should i think about that? plus i was just 19 at the time, so my brain was not fully grown...

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scallywag

From "Help Me" topic started by NaturalBorn in Finding meaning:
 

yes i have read the all haha, and i just couldn't find a story like mine, somebody being nutts enought to go cold turkey from 300 mgs of effexor.... plus everybody seems to be partial healed and that's what's scaries me... i wanna be 100% and everybody talks about being healed but still worst then they were before drugs, that's my fear... yesterday i read about a lady who was on 75 mgs of effexor, tappered until 8 mgs, and then stopped and went psychotic... sometimes i fear that some other crazy symptom may pop in years after, but of course i don't know.... i know that for a period i went hypomaniac, and did all kinds of embarassing things.... sometimes i can see how i'm overworried about this, but just can't help it, memories of those 4 months of cold turkey keep coming back to me and i just feel like a roller coaster of symptoms . in my most positive thoughts i think that after this i will be "stronger" and that's what encourages me... if i could just find someboody saying like "after years i dont have ANY residual symptom" i would be glad, but anyway thanks a lot tntd you are the person that have helped me the most in this... i wish the best for you



Hi NB,

Thank you, I'm glad I've been able to help in some small way. I tried to respond to you yesterday but our internet service was down all day. They were fixing some server in our neighborhood.

I have to admit that when I first was on here I looked for someone, anyone with a similar story to mine as well. I think it's natural to want to know if someone else has gone through somethinig close to what we are going through so we can see what happened to them. I haven't been able to find anyone who had a problem cold turkeying off of Wellbutrin so I know the frustration. I quit looking after awhile. Plus I found reading all the stories at the time scared me just too much so I quit reading those and instead focused on the strategies of how to get through this horror.

It sounds like your first four months were awful. Have you been able to talk with anyone about your experience? Do those thoughts come unbidden as in intrusive thoughts. Being in withdrawal our minds conjur all sorts of horrible possibilities and I think it uses past experiences as it is trying to heal. This may be why you are thinking about what happened so early on. Your brain is healing and trying to deal with everything. It is not fun and I have called the windows and waves experience a rollercoaster. Have you had any windows? some people do and some people don't.

I have read some stories, I can't remember which ones, of people that are 100% better but they are not the same as they were. This experience changes us so your 100% better may be different than what you imagine it to be. It also may take awhile to get there. I know a lot of the stories I read said that they felt they are better in many ways than they were before they went through this.

I think it is a common fear that either we will never get better or we won't be as good as we were. Especially since we are all ramped up with symptoms and fear is one of the symptoms so it makes the worst case scenario seeem possible. When I find myself thinking this way I try to use a lot of the coping skills that I have learned in the past, breathing, meditation, grounding, changing the channel. There are lots. I do find the one that always works is getting on the computer and reading postive posts or doing some research on a supplement I am interested in or finding a subject that I find interesting and doing research on that. My brain is pretty bad cognitively so I don't retain a lot of it but it keeps my brain off my symptoms for the time being. I also find that journaling my day, or my experiences is a helpful distraction. I either do that here or in a paper journal I have at home. I often journal while I'm watching TV. That really keeps my mind busy :) Fortunately for us our minds can only focus on one thing at a time so if you can find something that absorbs you that is not symptom related you will have some relief.

Do you have any things that you like to do that keep your mind off your symptoms?

I hope you are finding some sort of relief today.

You are in my thoughts often and when I meditate I send healing energy and compassion your way.

{{{Hugs}}}



Hi NB

I found some success stories. The first one on this page is someone who is recovered 100%. I haven't read many of the others so I don't know how many there are.

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1226-recovery-success-stories-from-around-the-web/page-4

I remember a story of a woman who cold turkey I think it was four meds all at once and her story ends with her being 100% recovered as well. I wish I could find it for you.

Cold turkey 100% recovery stories are out there. I can't remember how I found the ones I did. Probably a search parameter I used. I have really bad memory problems from the benzo I'm taking, it's really frustrating. I have up and down days with it and today is kind of bad so I'm not going to even hazard a guess as to how I found that story.

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1602-whatever-quit-six-meds-cold-turkey-and-lived-to-tell-about-it/ This is Whatever's recovery story, she is 100% and she cold turkey off of six meds.

Hope some of these help you feel better about your prospects of returning to 100%. Just remember that we all have different time lines so don't try to compare.

Hugs and healing to you.

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NaturalBorn

 

From "Help Me" topic started by NaturalBorn in Finding meaning:

 

yes i have read the all haha, and i just couldn't find a story like mine, somebody being nutts enought to go cold turkey from 300 mgs of effexor.... plus everybody seems to be partial healed and that's what's scaries me... i wanna be 100% and everybody talks about being healed but still worst then they were before drugs, that's my fear... yesterday i read about a lady who was on 75 mgs of effexor, tappered until 8 mgs, and then stopped and went psychotic... sometimes i fear that some other crazy symptom may pop in years after, but of course i don't know.... i know that for a period i went hypomaniac, and did all kinds of embarassing things.... sometimes i can see how i'm overworried about this, but just can't help it, memories of those 4 months of cold turkey keep coming back to me and i just feel like a roller coaster of symptoms . in my most positive thoughts i think that after this i will be "stronger" and that's what encourages me... if i could just find someboody saying like "after years i dont have ANY residual symptom" i would be glad, but anyway thanks a lot tntd you are the person that have helped me the most in this... i wish the best for you

 

Hi NB,

 

Thank you, I'm glad I've been able to help in some small way. I tried to respond to you yesterday but our internet service was down all day. They were fixing some server in our neighborhood.

 

I have to admit that when I first was on here I looked for someone, anyone with a similar story to mine as well. I think it's natural to want to know if someone else has gone through somethinig close to what we are going through so we can see what happened to them. I haven't been able to find anyone who had a problem cold turkeying off of Wellbutrin so I know the frustration. I quit looking after awhile. Plus I found reading all the stories at the time scared me just too much so I quit reading those and instead focused on the strategies of how to get through this horror.

 

It sounds like your first four months were awful. Have you been able to talk with anyone about your experience? Do those thoughts come unbidden as in intrusive thoughts. Being in withdrawal our minds conjur all sorts of horrible possibilities and I think it uses past experiences as it is trying to heal. This may be why you are thinking about what happened so early on. Your brain is healing and trying to deal with everything. It is not fun and I have called the windows and waves experience a rollercoaster. Have you had any windows? some people do and some people don't.

 

I have read some stories, I can't remember which ones, of people that are 100% better but they are not the same as they were. This experience changes us so your 100% better may be different than what you imagine it to be. It also may take awhile to get there. I know a lot of the stories I read said that they felt they are better in many ways than they were before they went through this.

 

I think it is a common fear that either we will never get better or we won't be as good as we were. Especially since we are all ramped up with symptoms and fear is one of the symptoms so it makes the worst case scenario seeem possible. When I find myself thinking this way I try to use a lot of the coping skills that I have learned in the past, breathing, meditation, grounding, changing the channel. There are lots. I do find the one that always works is getting on the computer and reading postive posts or doing some research on a supplement I am interested in or finding a subject that I find interesting and doing research on that. My brain is pretty bad cognitively so I don't retain a lot of it but it keeps my brain off my symptoms for the time being. I also find that journaling my day, or my experiences is a helpful distraction. I either do that here or in a paper journal I have at home. I often journal while I'm watching TV. That really keeps my mind busy :) Fortunately for us our minds can only focus on one thing at a time so if you can find something that absorbs you that is not symptom related you will have some relief.

 

Do you have any things that you like to do that keep your mind off your symptoms?

 

I hope you are finding some sort of relief today.

 

You are in my thoughts often and when I meditate I send healing energy and compassion your way.

 

{{{Hugs}}}

 

Hi NB

 

I found some success stories. The first one on this page is someone who is recovered 100%. I haven't read many of the others so I don't know how many there are.

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1226-recovery-success-stories-from-around-the-web/page-4

 

I remember a story of a woman who cold turkey I think it was four meds all at once and her story ends with her being 100% recovered as well. I wish I could find it for you.

 

Cold turkey 100% recovery stories are out there. I can't remember how I found the ones I did. Probably a search parameter I used. I have really bad memory problems from the benzo I'm taking, it's really frustrating. I have up and down days with it and today is kind of bad so I'm not going to even hazard a guess as to how I found that story.

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1602-whatever-quit-six-meds-cold-turkey-and-lived-to-tell-about-it/ This is Whatever's recovery story, she is 100% and she cold turkey off of six meds.

 

Hope some of these help you feel better about your prospects of returning to 100%. Just remember that we all have different time lines so don't try to compare.

 

Hugs and healing to you.

 

you are on my thoughts as well tntd, i can't express how much i aprecciate your concern, you have been more helpfull then any doctor i have ever seen haha, yes i was able to talk to some people, but i'm really embaressed about this, mainly i have just opened about this to my mom and doctors, of course a lot of people just realized that there was something wrong with me, even my 8 years old nephew came to me and said i was weird and that she was scared of me (that was during the hypomaniac stage) and i have a twin brother, everybody just keeps saying how skinny i am compared to him, i used to be bigger then him in my workout days, some people actually suggested to my mom that i was on coke. i don't recall any windows in that 4 month period, but i did got a little better while on rehab, probably because i didn't had to deal with anybody and could request a sleeping pill whenever i needed, plus i was on  more meds. i guess i really have some intrusive thoughts sometimes i keep thinking the same thing robotically for hours... i have no idea how to talk to people about this so i just don't, even tho i asked to my mom to not talk about this to anybody she just did. she mentioned pretty much to almost everybody in the family, and i can understand that, but i just hate everybody thinking that i'm somekind of depressed crazy guy, i stopped talking to 90% of people during that period, today i was remembering my hypomaniac stage, and oh my god i wish i had no memories of that, i said a LOT of crap to family members and friends and posted the most kind of ridiculous things on my social medias, after that i just went and deleted them all... the only one i kept was my twitter, sometimes i go there and see the thing i posted on october of 2015, and i'm like oh my god, i sure did lost my mind...

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NaturalBorn

 

 

From "Help Me" topic started by NaturalBorn in Finding meaning:

 

yes i have read the all haha, and i just couldn't find a story like mine, somebody being nutts enought to go cold turkey from 300 mgs of effexor.... plus everybody seems to be partial healed and that's what's scaries me... i wanna be 100% and everybody talks about being healed but still worst then they were before drugs, that's my fear... yesterday i read about a lady who was on 75 mgs of effexor, tappered until 8 mgs, and then stopped and went psychotic... sometimes i fear that some other crazy symptom may pop in years after, but of course i don't know.... i know that for a period i went hypomaniac, and did all kinds of embarassing things.... sometimes i can see how i'm overworried about this, but just can't help it, memories of those 4 months of cold turkey keep coming back to me and i just feel like a roller coaster of symptoms . in my most positive thoughts i think that after this i will be "stronger" and that's what encourages me... if i could just find someboody saying like "after years i dont have ANY residual symptom" i would be glad, but anyway thanks a lot tntd you are the person that have helped me the most in this... i wish the best for you

 

Hi NB,

 

Thank you, I'm glad I've been able to help in some small way. I tried to respond to you yesterday but our internet service was down all day. They were fixing some server in our neighborhood.

 

I have to admit that when I first was on here I looked for someone, anyone with a similar story to mine as well. I think it's natural to want to know if someone else has gone through somethinig close to what we are going through so we can see what happened to them. I haven't been able to find anyone who had a problem cold turkeying off of Wellbutrin so I know the frustration. I quit looking after awhile. Plus I found reading all the stories at the time scared me just too much so I quit reading those and instead focused on the strategies of how to get through this horror.

 

It sounds like your first four months were awful. Have you been able to talk with anyone about your experience? Do those thoughts come unbidden as in intrusive thoughts. Being in withdrawal our minds conjur all sorts of horrible possibilities and I think it uses past experiences as it is trying to heal. This may be why you are thinking about what happened so early on. Your brain is healing and trying to deal with everything. It is not fun and I have called the windows and waves experience a rollercoaster. Have you had any windows? some people do and some people don't.

 

I have read some stories, I can't remember which ones, of people that are 100% better but they are not the same as they were. This experience changes us so your 100% better may be different than what you imagine it to be. It also may take awhile to get there. I know a lot of the stories I read said that they felt they are better in many ways than they were before they went through this.

 

I think it is a common fear that either we will never get better or we won't be as good as we were. Especially since we are all ramped up with symptoms and fear is one of the symptoms so it makes the worst case scenario seeem possible. When I find myself thinking this way I try to use a lot of the coping skills that I have learned in the past, breathing, meditation, grounding, changing the channel. There are lots. I do find the one that always works is getting on the computer and reading postive posts or doing some research on a supplement I am interested in or finding a subject that I find interesting and doing research on that. My brain is pretty bad cognitively so I don't retain a lot of it but it keeps my brain off my symptoms for the time being. I also find that journaling my day, or my experiences is a helpful distraction. I either do that here or in a paper journal I have at home. I often journal while I'm watching TV. That really keeps my mind busy :) Fortunately for us our minds can only focus on one thing at a time so if you can find something that absorbs you that is not symptom related you will have some relief.

 

Do you have any things that you like to do that keep your mind off your symptoms?

 

I hope you are finding some sort of relief today.

 

You are in my thoughts often and when I meditate I send healing energy and compassion your way.

 

{{{Hugs}}}

 

Hi NB

 

I found some success stories. The first one on this page is someone who is recovered 100%. I haven't read many of the others so I don't know how many there are.

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1226-recovery-success-stories-from-around-the-web/page-4

 

I remember a story of a woman who cold turkey I think it was four meds all at once and her story ends with her being 100% recovered as well. I wish I could find it for you.

 

Cold turkey 100% recovery stories are out there. I can't remember how I found the ones I did. Probably a search parameter I used. I have really bad memory problems from the benzo I'm taking, it's really frustrating. I have up and down days with it and today is kind of bad so I'm not going to even hazard a guess as to how I found that story.

 

http://survivingantidepressants.org/index.php?/topic/1602-whatever-quit-six-meds-cold-turkey-and-lived-to-tell-about-it/ This is Whatever's recovery story, she is 100% and she cold turkey off of six meds.

 

Hope some of these help you feel better about your prospects of returning to 100%. Just remember that we all have different time lines so don't try to compare.

 

Hugs and healing to you.

 

you are on my thoughts as well tntd, i can't express how much i aprecciate your concern, you have been more helpfull then any doctor i have ever seen haha, yes i was able to talk to some people, but i'm really embaressed about this, mainly i have just opened about this to my mom and doctors, of course a lot of people just realized that there was something wrong with me, even my 8 years old nephew came to me and said i was weird and that she was scared of me (that was during the hypomaniac stage) and i have a twin brother, everybody just keeps saying how skinny i am compared to him, i used to be bigger then him in my workout days, some people actually suggested to my mom that i was on coke. i don't recall any windows in that 4 month period, but i did got a little better while on rehab, probably because i didn't had to deal with anybody and could request a sleeping pill whenever i needed, plus i was on  more meds. i guess i really have some intrusive thoughts sometimes i keep thinking the same thing robotically for hours... i have no idea how to talk to people about this so i just don't, even tho i asked to my mom to not talk about this to anybody she just did. she mentioned pretty much to almost everybody in the family, and i can understand that, but i just hate everybody thinking that i'm somekind of depressed crazy guy, i stopped talking to 90% of people during that period, today i was remembering my hypomaniac stage, and oh my god i wish i had no memories of that, i said a LOT of crap to family members and friends and posted the most kind of ridiculous things on my social medias, after that i just went and deleted them all... the only one i kept was my twitter, sometimes i go there and see the thing i posted on october of 2015, and i'm like oh my god, i sure did lost my mind...

 

oh yes and about the things i like to do to distract myself from symptoms is listening to music, i'm REALLY into music, when i was better after rehab i would watch netflix and hangout with my friends a little, but now just music again, also playing guitar but that is really frustrating, i feel like i don't improve like i should and forget songs really easily plus the paresthesia makes it harder and a little unconfortable... i can say that trying anything new to me sounds awfull, because i just feel like i won't be able to do it good, you know? i'm a little bit of a perfeccionist haha

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fuerza

Hey! I'm here to offer my support. We were on the same drug for the same amount of time and found this forum at the same time, ha. I can relate to your pain and especially to what you said about losing your youth. I'm a bit older than you (25), but I lost my first good job to this crap and I'm also in my first REAL relationship, where I really feel I want to be with this person. However, I've found a silver lining for myself. I'm still young and so is my brain. And that means my brain can heal itself faster. Also, I can't imagine the horror of going though this when you have children and have to provide for someone. At leat in your youth you're mostly responsible for yourself only.

 

Another thing which I can relate to is the cognitive decline. I used to be a sharp girl, my quick wit and intelligence was one of my best assets, but right now I feel sooooo slow. I constantly find myself at a loss of words. But again, this symptom is normal. I don't think it's only the drugs. It's also the stress of having been through all this crap and worrying about it every second of every day. This will get better. Especially for you, hon. My boyfriend's mother is an excellent neurologist and she told me that the human brain reaches maturity at 25 and you reach your mental peak at 30. She also works with children who have suffered brain trauma and says she has seen immense improvement with time and therapy. Everything is possible.

 

You also asked about changing your doses and reinstanting. I don't have exactly the same experience, but I was on 75mg and suddenly experienced derealisation after something I would describe as mania-ish. Then my GP accidentally gave me a presciption for 37,5mg. I unknowingly took that for a week and thought I was gonna die. I found out and went back on 75mg. A couple of months later I tapered off in a few months (way too fast). I try not to think about too much about the impact this might've had, because it's done already. This only feeds the negative 'what-if' thoughts. And these are the thoughts I'm personally having the most trouble with.

 

Lastly, I see you're also supplementing. I just wanted to say that I've found some relief with Silexan. It's a natural lavender and lemon balm supplement which has been tested in clinical trials next to placebos and antidepressants/benzos. It has shown very impressive results in lowering anxiety. Silexan is the more expensive version, but there's also CalmAid that contains the same stuff and is a lot more afoordable. Of course, I'm not a doctor and if you decide to use this, please make sure there's no interaction with your medicine. Yesterday I took one capsule before sleep along with 500mg vitamin C and some magnesium and I didn't wake up in a state of complete panic. I still feel quite bad, but still a lot better and waking up yesterday.

 

All in all, I'm sure we'll get through this. Every new day is another step. This may very well be the most difficult time of our lives, but it may also be the biggest lesson we've ever learned about ourselves and the world around us. What I've found a bit helpful is run daily errands and keep myself busy with something. Even though I feel agoraphobia, I still go out not to lose touch with the outside world and feed the fear. I've literally went out and been completely sure that I was gonna die or experience psychosis, but that didn't happen. I don't feel any gratitude from doing this in the the short-term, but I know this will help me heal in long-term as I won't have to start my life from scratch.

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peng

I am 71 have had guitars for over 40 years and still cannot play!

Never mind, I'm with you on the pleasure of listening to music.

Love many types - Jobim and all those other guys give great delight.

Don't despair and you have plenty of time to work towards your dreams, young man.

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