TheWayfarer: Zoloft Side Effect + Emotionless

[TheWayfarer]

Sometimes i feel the depression lift and feel a strong emotion that is usually hard to identify, it feels more chemical and not attached to my thoughts. The low libido/absence of maturity is always there/ (mature thoughts, emotions exedra) I'm just posting this information in hopes DKDEREK or others can tell me if this is depression and stress like i am told to believe. 

[Djderek]

Your next goal should be to detach yourself from the idea that your damaged, and that your damned for life. It's simply Not true. That idea alone if you believe it will keep you trapped in the pits of depression and mental torment.

[Djderek]

Walk around with a note pad, and every time you start to think about pssd or anything negative, write it down on your note pad, and Immediately go for a run, or do some push ups. Try to get to a point where your thinking about pleasant things like how bright your future is

[TheWayfarer]

Alright, I'm just debating with myself weather its PSSD or CNS dysregulation or just plain stress anxiety depression placebo. It seems whenever i get a window it is companied by extreme stress and anxiety and pain. thats lasts for a bit then i become numb again

[scallywag]

Wayfarer, I saw this post from a member who has successfully tapered of an SSRI antidepressant. In combination with Derek's suggestion, you may find it helpful

 

...

I don't discuss symptoms at all in any capacity, so I won't be discussing which symptom went away first or which ones I still have. This choice to not speak about symptoms has profoundly and positively impacted my recovery.

...

Derek, that's a great suggestion for observing thoughts and then distracting from them. Thanks!

[TheWayfarer]

Scally whats your take on why my phycolagist said?

[TheWayfarer]

My mistake i said phyciatrist

[ChessieCat]

The thought that came to my mind when I read it was "performance anxiety".

 

From this site which I suggest you read:  "Anxiety is a future-oriented emotion in which you catastrophize about the consequences of a possible future event".

[scallywag]

What did your psychiatrist say, Wayfarer?

[TheWayfarer]

            #214            

[scallywag]

I'm having a hard time reading large blocks of text. Would you summarize what you want feedback on?

[TheWayfarer]

Its fine, in a nutshell she thinks that i was dealing with a ton of stress anxiaty before all this happened.

 

 

Once taking the medication i had a negative reaction.

 

 

 

 

I cotastraphised about the side efffects.

 

 

 

 

After figuring out it was probably pssd i thought i was doomed and so were all my dreams.

 

 

 

 

 

My body was thrown of balenece so all the stress i have been balenecing came tumbling down on me.

 

 

 

 

 

The stress anxiaty and depression along with placebo of pssd has kept me feeling theese symptoms most of wich are brought on by stress and anxiaty

 

 

 

 

Once i solve the stress and am stress free for a long period of time i will see things get better such as sexuality

 

 

 

 

If i can somve depression allso i will see my emotions return

 

 

 

 

She agree sexual side effects of meds do occur and but does not think pssd is a long term side effect of medication.

 

 

 

 

She belives its a combination of stress anxiaty depression and placebo effect. She belives stress and anxiaty and depression can and are causing all my problems.

[TheWayfarer]

She came to this conclusion after doing a considerable amount of research online on pssd.

 

She looked at medicle jounrals and even fourums. She even looked at SA fourums and sevral peoples cases.

 

She is very open minded about the idea but baced on what we know about SSRI's and the human brain she doesnt see how it is possible.

 

And if possible highly unlikly.

[TheWayfarer]

IN a smaller nutshell.

 

Do i have pssd? Or are my symptoms purely STRESS ANXIATY DEPRESSION and PLACEBO EFFECT?

 

(In your opninoun)

[TheWayfarer]

Allso, i find myself crying allot yet i feel nothing in my heart. Can that allso be depression?

[TheWayfarer]

This morning i felt some emotion but when i felt popping in the top of my head it weant away. The popping felt like a twisted blood vesel unstwisted sudengly i felt around 4 before the emottion faded. Now i knly feel emotion in my stomach and its not a good emotion. I feel like i sometimes respond apropropiatlt to situation but the feeling doesnt feel like real feeling. At other times i allso feel like i cant feel the emotion, but i can feel it intalectualy....

[scallywag]

Ok, thank you for taking the time to make your post easier to read for this foggy-minded moderator.  I don't know much about PSSD except that it exists.  To the best of my limited knowledge, there isn't a consensus about the mechanism of action by which an SSRI causes this condition, nor is there anything resembling a consensus about treatment.

 

Her conjecture about the source of any ongoing symptoms is unfairly dismissive of you and unnecessarily arrogant about her knowledge.  People can and do have strong negative reactions to medication, as you know from your own experience.

 

Your doctor's opinion has one benefit: It's helpful for everyone to learn techniques to cope with and reduce stress and anxiety. 

[TheWayfarer]

I appreciate it, after even further research i have come to the conclusion everything i am experiencing can be caused by stress anxiety, depression and placebo. My brain is dis regulated, that's a fact; the pill threw my brain off balance but it did not alter my brain chemistry like PSSD sufferers like to believe it can. Emotional numbness, De-realization, Denationalization, sexual numbness, fatigue, lack of adrenaline. All thees symptoms are common in those suffering from PTSD and other severe stress disorders.  Although it is disturbing it seems my rare case of half emotional numbness mirrors the emotional numbness of those on SSRI's i guess i just have to ignore that and have faith i will recovery and it is not PSSD.

[JanCarol]

Hey Wayfarer - correct!

 

This numbness, anhedonia are insulation to protect you.

 

DP/DR can be a strategy in the face of trauma - also to protect you - by shifting your perceptions of reality into something which gives you a whole new set of problems.

 

I caution you against using "diagnosis words" to describe anything you are going through.

 

For one thing, it will make you a better writer to be descriptive.  Instead of listing a string of "PTSD, DP/DR, PSSD" acronyms and DSM diagnoses - consider describing what is happening to you, what you are feeling about it, what you want it to be like, how you think you can get there.  In addition to making you a better writer, it will give you better insight into your experience.

 

Start with the DP/DR.  Have you read Shep's thread?  She has some very astute observations of her mental and emotional states when her perceptions shift.

 

What is that perceptual shift you are calling DP/DR?  Maybe not for here - maybe for a journal - but by looking into these "symptoms" in a descriptive way, you can learn more about the who, what, where, how, why and when of your perceptual shifts.

 

You talked about your discomfort in the acupuncture.    I have a different perspective on that. 

 

First of all, that immediate sensation of exhaustion - is gone, now, right?  Or has greatly improved?  What did you do with that exhaustion?  Did you take it home and put it to bed and let it rest for 3 days?  Or did you just keep pressing through it.  This is important - because if you did the former, you are likely to feel better, but if you did the latter, you are likely to feel the same, or worse.

 

In my experience with treatments - there is a slight "crash" after treatment.  I went to the osteopath on Tuesday.  His treatment is gentle, but when I left there, I was in more pain than when I went in.  And yesterday, I felt like I'd been run over by a truck.  But today - things are lining up, the chi is flowing, and I feel better - and I know I will continue to feel better for a number of weeks.

 

It's called a "healing reaction."  When you bang your shin on a table, the first thing your body does (after sending out numbing endorphins) is swell up with inflammation.  The point of the inflammation is to heal the injuury.  Acupuncture works like this, too.

 

When I get off the table from an acupuncture session, I can barely move.  My body is usually hurting and humming in new ways, and that is the redirection of chi.  For the rest of the day, I feel very vulnerable, as if I could injure easily, or fall down.  The best thing for me to do after acupuncture is to get right in a magnesium bath - but I don't always have that luxury.  But I always take the magnesium bath that night.

 

By the next morning, that feeling is gone (I don't know if it would be, if I didn't take the magnesium soak).  And while I may be tired, still, from the treatment, I start to get better again, as my energy "lines up."

 

You quoted some stuff from Dr. Lam's site - his focus is on adrenal fatigue, which you do not have.   Adrenal fatigue is an extreme state caused by long term, multiple stressors.

 

What you are doing here is, again, catastrophizing, and that will only worsen your condition.  You need to find threads of thought and behaviour which improve your condition, lower your stress, instead of piling a bunch of catastrophe on your already struggling nervous system! 

 

Look to what you can do.  Okay, "junk" not working?  Then ignore it!  Ignore it for months until you forget about it.  Focus instead on art and music and politics and the things that get you fired up.  Enjoy the things that you can - the bright sunshine, the sea breezes, the gardens & trees, the insects - observe the world around you.  It's not the big things that will heal you, but a lot of little things.  A taste of chocolate.  The freedom of walking wherever you want.  The ability to sing and shout and discourse with people. Find the things which bring you pleasure, and your pleasure - even if it is the smallest things (like a cuppa tea) - will lead you in the direction of healing.

 

I hope you see the sun today!

[TheWayfarer]

Thanks for the reply, i do believe i have adrenal fatigue. Because before the meds i was stressed every day. I had adrenaline attacks that lasted around four hours a day. This lasted around two years prior to taking the medication... Stress to that degree day in and day out can definitely cause adrenal fatigue. But i am alright with that. because i know that adrenal fatigue only lasts as long as stress lasts, if i can solve the stress everything will fix itself.

 

As it stands i would describe it as being disconnected, i cant really feel the inside of my body IE emotions and gut feelings. Even when i get emotional i cant feel the emotions i know im emotional as a fact, and i can tell by my voice and skind and sometimes throat but that is about it. I also feel a constant chemicle sensation throughout my body especially in my head. I feel as if my heart has been gouged out...

Since the acupuncture i haven't felt a return of my gut feeling or strong adrenaline, i have been very fatigued since every day. But at this point i blame adrenal fatigue for that.

 

Thank you for the advice though, i just need to get better. This has no relation to the medication, it is out of my system and could have in no way made any permanent changes or even long term.

I am meeting with a physiologist  who is helping me learn coping mechanisms. Once i am over the stress everything will return. I just need to get over it. For my family and my country, for myself. I am not sure how long i can hold on to the man i once was without my emotional compass. And the longer i have this the more it will become a habbit for my brain to be this way.

 

I also am always smelling this putrid smell i cant seem to escape it.

 

I dont need to see someone elses post frankly i am tired of this website and all those PSSD websites . No wonder so many people are sick even if i were healthy i would get sick listening to all there doom and gloom. They call themselves doomed pherhaps that is the exact reason they stay the way they are. There mental paradigm. This website is not life. It is not living. I am tired of being a slave to my stress, to the fear PSSD instills on me. I need to get better. I am getting better i have to it is my destiny. I refuse to be a bystander in life. I will recover this year, everything will return this year and i will move on with my life stronger and more prepared than i ever was before. God will use this experience to prepare me for my dream. I will get my emotions back, i will get my passion anger and inspiration back, i will get my emotional compass back. And i will live life. It cant be any other way it wont be. And when i accomplish my dream, i will not forget everyone who has helped me on this site. And those suffering from SSRI induced long term side effects. I swear.

 

I hate doctors and i hate thees websites, i understand doctors are good people and i admire there empathy, i understand thees websites are helpful. But this is not life. Life is not accepting a half recovery, life is not visiting doctors constantly, life is not tapering, life is not this that humanity conjured up in the name of efficiency.

 

Internet, doctors offices, MRI machines, pills, allergy shots, beandryl shots i am tired of it all.

 

I want nothing more than to be living life, to wake up in the morning know who i am, to have the emotions i once had, the dreams i once had. To travel the world with my brother and friends, study history with my teacher get a doctorate , join the navy,  make a difference in this country, and to retire to the Swiss country side, have a nice log cabin on a lake near a town were everyone knows everyone. And god willing a wife.

 

I don't know what else to say to be frank. This is my last post on this site till i get better or make a great improvement/acquire new info that may be very helpful for others who are experiencing what i am. 

 

Till then

-Wayfarer

Edited December 8, 2016 by ChessieCat
removed obscenities

[TheWayfarer]

Hello, yes i am back already and with no good news. I just would like to ask a question i will soon ask my doctor. I was thinking that if what i have started after taking the SSRI i doubt it is PSSD but it did start then. So could 5-HTP supplements cure me and return me to normal? Or should i start Wellbutrin? I have heard it is a different SSRI and can solve emotional blunting and make people normal again. I cant take this much longer. It is nearing the holidays and i feel nothing, who knows how long my grandmother will live and i may very well be spending my last christmas with her emotionless and confused. I need to get it all back soon. please tell me if this will work and not make things worse. My goal is for my brain to reach its PRE-SSRI state. thank you

 

PS: What bothers me further is that i promised to stay off the forums but I'm back on and feel no guilt. I truly am a terrible person. But its not me its my brain. please help me. Tell me if this will work.

[TheWayfarer]

Does PSSD even exist? As it stands there is only anecdotal evidence and even that evidence is invalid seeing most people with PSSD have severe underlying stress anxiety and depression along with a bad mental paradigm. There are many stages of depression and stress, just like how a depressed combat vet eventually becomes numb(sexually to) due to the constant barrage of stress and depression most people who claim t have PSSD probably have it to. Stress eventually becomes numb stress. It downs out most emotion. Also according to my nabhor who is a phycologist 91% of all sexual dysfunction is caused by stress/anxiety and placebo)

 

I also find that the only time i feel(some) emotion (normally) is in my dreams, it is also the only time i have erections. This could be because my minds "defense" is down during REM. People such as GH0ST claim to have had PSSD after only 4 pills, there are also others who claimed to have it for years after only one pill. But even that doesn't make much sense seeing there is no solid scientific evidence. Look what i am saying is, why should i believe PSSD is real if there is no evidence and almost all anecdotal evidence is from people with extreme stress sanctity and depression? Why should i believe it if Stress anxiety and depression and placebo has been proved to cause every single side effect of PSSD to the T while PSSD has no evidence? 

(To the Administrators who link PSSD websites in others posts) It really does not seem like a good idea to me to lead those suffering from severe stress anxiety depression and(usually) OCD to a website full of people with similar experiences who are either on the verge of suicide or wallowing in each others grief and regret. That website has almost made me commit suicide! And the most foolish part about linking it is there is no official scientific evidence to support it! I don't mean to insult you guys you are very helpful but it just doesn't seem right for such a fact based sight as this to canonize such a vague un-proven disorder.

 

By the way if you can prove me wrong please do, i am starting a discussion on PSSD for both my sake(as i am in the process of breaking down a destructive mental paradigm) and the sake of all those who read this forum after me. PSSD is not proven to be real, only a few people have been confirmed to have something similar but these people had to rule out everything else first and they also took the meds for far longer than one year. 

[AliG]

Wayfarer. I'm not sure what you're trying to achieve here . What is your goal ?

[TheWayfarer]

I have two goals I wish to accomplish with this post. 1) i am currently in the proses of breaking down my own mental paradimg that it may be PSSD, so in order to convince myself it is not I posted a logical argument. If no one can dis-prove it then my mental paradimg will further break down. 2) I know in the future many people will be going through what I am going through now, they will question what it is some will come to the conclusion it is PSSD witch is a dangerous one to come to. Not only is it very very rare and has little evidence supporting it but it can lead the person to hopelessness, and some suicide. I have seen it many times. So this post is also here to persuad them it is not PSSD.

 

This post is not intended to insult people's personal beliefs but question them in a productive manner.

[Shep]

Hi, Wayfarer.

 

 

I have two goals I wish to accomplish with this post. 1) i am currently in the proses of breaking down my own mental paradimg that it may be PSSD, so in order to convince myself it is not I posted a logical argument. If no one can dis-prove it then my mental paradimg will further break down. 

 

Here are some research papers about PSSD:

 

Papers about Post-SSRI Sexual Disorder (PSSD)

 

Post-SSRI sexual dysfunction (PSSD)

 

 

 2) I know in the future many people will be going through what I am going through now, they will question what it is some will come to the conclusion it is PSSD witch is a dangerous one to come to. Not only is it very very rare and has little evidence supporting it but it can lead the person to hopelessness, and some suicide. I have seen it many times. So this post is also here to persuad them it is not PSSD.

This post is not intended to insult people's personal beliefs but question them in a productive manner.

 

 

Why is it dangerous to find out that your problem is related to the drugs you take?

 

For me, it was a relief, as I'd thought for years there was something wrong with me. To find it it's the drugs I was taking was a relief. 

 

What you may be dealing with are catastrophic thoughts that come from having an illness that can take awhile to resolve. Thinking you will never heal - especially from only taking one dose - is a lot of weight to carry on your shoulders. You are most likely going to heal, but it may take awhile. Take care of your CNS in the meantime. Learn some non-drug coping skills. 

 

As far as it being rare, please link to some research on this. It's reported quite commonly on this site, as well as other withdrawal sites.

 

There are success stories:

 

Success: Recovery From Protracted Zoloft Withdrawal and PSSD

 

Success story for PSSD and ongoing discontinuation symptoms, please read

 

If you've been checked out to rule out other medical conditions, then I would assume it's PSSD and take care of yourself as much as possible until you're feeling better.

 

 

Hello, yes i am back already and with no good news. I just would like to ask a question i will soon ask my doctor. I was thinking that if what i have started after taking the SSRI i doubt it is PSSD but it did start then. So could 5-HTP supplements cure me and return me to normal? Or should i start Wellbutrin? I have heard it is a different SSRI and can solve emotional blunting and make people normal again. I cant take this much longer. It is nearing the holidays and i feel nothing, who knows how long my grandmother will live and i may very well be spending my last christmas with her emotionless and confused. I need to get it all back soon. please tell me if this will work and not make things worse. My goal is for my brain to reach its PRE-SSRI state. thank you

 

PS: What bothers me further is that i promised to stay off the forums but I'm back on and feel no guilt. I truly am a terrible person. But its not me its my brain. please help me. Tell me if this will work.

 

 

You're not a terrible person. You're struggling, as most of the people on this forum are.

 

Here is some information on 5-HTP:

 

5-HTP

 

We do not recommend Wellbutrin or any other drug for resolving withdrawal. And considering you had a severe reaction to just one small dose of Zoloft, I would say you in particular should stay away from any serotonin drug or supplement. If you're reaction was this severe with one dose, this is not a type of drug you want to get a dependency on. 

 

If you want to spend some quality time with your grandmother over Christmas, just having you around is enough. Read to her, talk to her, tell her you love her.

 

For most of us, it's a matter of faking it until we feel better. I'm sorry this has happened to you, but the fact that you now know how dangerous these drugs are at your young age of 18 is really a benefit to you. Give yourself time to heal, knowing you know more than most of your peers about these drugs. Your future is going to be bright, but it's going to take some time for your CNS to recover from this severe reaction.

 

 

 

 

 

[TheWayfarer]

This may sounds sassy and a pit antagonistic i really dont mean it in that way, but i had a medical professional who is very open minded read most of the articles you have sent me, she spent allot of time researching PSSD going on forums visiting sites exct, and she came to the conclusion as a medical professional that for the most part PSSD is stress anxiety depression and placebo. She is not a a fan of pharmaceuticals and believes the best way to recover from thees issues is the natural way. So i will personally will put more weight in the words of a medical professional. 

 

As for it not being rare, you said it is common on this site, of course it is people dont come on this site unless they hare having an issue with medication. So it will be naturally bias. I am saying it is dangerous because 9 out of 10 people who believe they have PSSD  have major depression, stress and anxiaty. The mental paradigm of PSSD keeps them form recovering.

 

 

Anyway thanks for the reply

-WF

[Shep]

You're welcome, Wayfarer. 

 

I'm glad you have a medical professional who isn't a fan of pharmaceuticals, but do keep in mind that the same research that promotes the use of these drugs is done by medical professionals, so it's good to research anything before taking it.

 

Sending healing vibes your way. 

[JanCarol]

Hey Wayfarer - 

 

 This has no relation to the medication, it is out of my system and could have in no way made any permanent changes or even long term.

 

Actually, having the drug in your bloodstream, fat or tissues is completely irrelevant to the side effects from the drugs.

 

The drugs work by restructuring the way your nervous system works, so recovery is about repairing those changes, even though the drugs may be long gone.

 

So symptoms like:

I also am always smelling this putrid smell i cant seem to escape it.

 

are very common experiences in withdrawal.

 

It was this symptom actually which gave me a clue that you are still probably suffering drug withdrawal.

 

Because of that, I would not make too much fuss about the PSSD stuff.  While you may have interrupted functioning for a time, time is the best healer for these things.  Be patient and kind to yourself, try not to Dr. Google too much, and try not to put labels on your symptoms.  They will pass, they will change.

 

And with sexual functioning, the best advice is to leave it alone.  Ignore it until it no longer wishes to be ignored.  Focus on other things, other passions, other interests.  It will come back, but it will take time.

 

Here is a list of possible symptoms to look at.  When you have a symptom, you can look at this list, and realize - yep.  That, too, is a symptom of withdrawal.  Dr. Joseph Glenmullen's Most Common symptoms of Withdrawal

 

 So could 5-HTP supplements cure me and return me to normal? Or should i start Wellbutrin? I have heard it is a different SSRI and can solve emotional blunting and make people normal again. 

 

First, you cannot use drugs to treat a drug symptom.

 

Second, you were so sensitive to the zoloft, I would avoid anything which affects your serotonin.  Forever.  So no 5HtP, no SAM-e, no St. John's Wort.  NOTHING.  This includes recreational drugs, should you ever be so inclined.

 

Time is the best healer.

 

You need to find out new ways to use your time, so that you are focused on the good parts, and spend less time diagnosing a drug reaction and catastrophizing about possible ways you could be damaged.

 

You mention that you are having feelings in dreams again.  That's good - you're the one who posted the excellent video about paying attention to your dreams is an important key to recovering from emotional numbing. Having feelings in your dreams is a good sign that you are healing.  Don't try to rush a good thing!

 

I hope you see the Sun today.

[TheWayfarer]

Thank you for the advice but i doubt one pill can change my CNS to this point. i have looked it up and parentally the stench is also a symptom of prolonged stress and anxiety. One thing i can't seem to understand though is the emotional symptoms its as if i am only experiencing 10% of each emotion and that emotion is achopanied by a chemical feeling. Its as if i feel a chemical reaction instead of an emotion. The way i see it there are only four possibilities. One is i am having a brain infection, the second is i am experiencing stress, anxiety and depression to an extreme degree, the third i have developed Negative Schizophrenia, or fourth i am experiencing PSSD.

 

According to my phycologist i don't have Schizo, even though i am expenrcing all the symptoms of NS. Also according to two phycologists who are very intelligent and open minded and have spend time actually reading PSSD forums and sites such as RISX, PSSD probably doesn't exist and if it does it would only affect those who are exposed to SSRI's for a very long time IE over a year at the least. 

 

The other two possibilities are the more likely ones. 

 

My doc believes i don't have a brain infection because there is a simpler explanation. That makes me weary because if i do have one its time critical. 

 

What they believe it is as i said before is i was balancing allot of stress and anxiety for a long time, the pill gave my brain a crutch, when the crutch was taken away my brain fell. All the stress and anxiety i had been holding at bay for so long came down on me. My brain to defend itself turned off my emotions and sexuality, everything that connected me to reality. The sudden shock of it sent me into a spiral of panic attacks and wrying about it being PSSD and eventually severe depression. Since then the constant stress anxiety and depression along with my mental paradigm that my brain is damaged has kept me like this. And once i accept it isn't anything else it is stress anxiety and depression i will recover. But that also means learning coping skills. 

 

What do you think?

 

 

 

[TheWayfarer]

I just don't see how one pill can really do all of this and if medical professionals don't see it either, i have a hard time finding merit in the CNS argument. But what explains the weird sensations in my head?

[ChessieCat]

My suggestion would be to check out where the pharmaceutical companies, and therefore the $$$, fit into the picture.

Interview:  Confessions of an Rx Drug Pusher (51 minutes Gwen Olsen - ex pharmaceutical representative)

 

Video:  Ex-Big Pharma Rep:  We’re Trained To Misinform -The Drugs ARE Dangerous (6 minute video)

 

And:

 

Excerpt:

How Did These Drugs Get Approved?
....
The FDA requires two adequately conducted clinical trials showing a significant difference between drug and placebo.  But there is a loophole:  there is no limit to the number of trials that can be conducted in search of these two significant trials.  Trials showing negative results simply do not count.  Furthermore, the clinical significance of the findings is not considered.  All that matters is that the results are statistically significant.
....
(NB:  emphasis in abstract and excerpt are mine)

 

Irving Kirsch (link to full article)

 

At 7.20 in the video linked below Kirsch explains how they gained information from the FDA via the Freedom of Information.

 

Video:  Irving Kirsch:  Emperor's New Drugs:  Antidepressants and the Placebo Effect (1 hour 20 minutes)

[TheWayfarer]

Yes my phycologist did agree that eventually these medications do affect the central nervous system and change it in the long term, she also agreed that the drugs don't fix anything at all that they are just a crutch. She also recognized that these meds do have really bad withdrawal symptoms and she recognizes the corruption of big pharmaceuticals but she does not believe it is possible at all for one pill or even a month of pills to permanently change a mind or in the long term. She believes it is almost imposable just because the brains CNS can't change that fast. 

 

That is why i don't believe it is PSSD or CNS deregulation.

[TheWayfarer]

It just isn't a logical conclusion its what my OCD/Medical anxiety wants me to believe but thats not it i am certain. If you believe you have information that proves it is possible for the CNS to be impacted in the long term after one pill then feel free to tell me. But coming from my doctor who has studied the human brain longer than perhaps most people on this forum and my nabor who has practiced it for over 30 years it is not possible. No offense but they have seen this information before(what you have sent me) they are not ignorant. But unlike most people who are anti SSRI they also know the positives. They understand both sides of the story and are experts in the field with more experience than anyone on this website. (i don't mean to offend) But as much as my OCD wants to catastrophise i believe it is wise to put there word above this forum.  

[TheWayfarer]

I have pretty much ruled out PSSD, i believe and CNS deregulation. I know what caused this or atlas i believe i do. I had intense OCD stress and anxiety before this, medical anxiety in particular. And since the severe reaction i had i have been traumatized and have catastophised witch has lead to worsened stress anxiety depression and OCD. That is what caused this and continues to cause this. 

 

Though that is not what i am worried about. I am worried that i may have either Bi-Polar disorder, borderline personality disorder or Negative Schizophrenia... I am told i am first of all much to long to develop it. Bt what if a dramatic event such as me believing my emotions and dreams were lost for good along with the intense stress brought it on early? I am told i don't exit the sings of NS because i question my past behavior and my current behavior. My nebahor who has treated people with S for many years and doesn't see it in me. He believes all my psychotic symptoms are from stress, anxiety depression and OCD. I must have faith in that. 

 

Even if i had bi polar my entire life bi polar can't get worse like this. I had a pretty stable personality and when i was depressed it was only momentary a week at the most so i think i can rule that out also. 

 

So my greatest concern is one of course i can't prove exists or doest exist. That being PSSD. I just have to have blind faith i don't have it. 

[Djderek]

I'm not sure how it happened or why it happens, but i understand from personal experience that its not permanent. I also understand that everyone who develops it all seems to have a few things in common.

 

Ocd tendencies, or nuerotic behavior

Lack of sleep

Inability to be Present

[Djderek]

The day you've left all your worries and fears behind may be the day you regain your presence.

 

Overworked, overburdened minds tend to demand more than the brain can handle. This leads to dysregulation.