Godiswithme: I'm very scared

[Godiswithme]

I don't know who told you reinstatement can help symptoms by 50%.

 

As you have observed, 1/10 mg is too strong for you. How are you measuring 1/10 mg?

A member of this forum.

[Godiswithme]

Have you heard of people being successful with less than 1/10 of a mg for a reinstatement? Thank you.

[Altostrata]

You may note that I was wary about reinstating an SSRI and told you several times that the milder Celexa might be preferable.

 

I have no idea if you'll do better with less Lexapro. All you can do is listen to your body and see what works.

 

We don't make any assurances about the benefits of reinstatement. If it works, it works, and you can tell the difference. It appears what you're taking is too strong.

 

That's the best I can do. You ask for answers but then go your own way. Speaking for myself, I find this very frustrating. You know what the principles are, you'll have to make your own decisions.

[Godiswithme]

I did listen to your advice. First, I evened out on the benzos to see if I could become more functional, but I didn't. I couldn't get a prescription for Celexa. I am trying. I am only asking if you have any knowledge of that tiny of an amount working for anyone?

[JanCarol]

GiWM - I hope you get a break for the holiday.

 

If you reacted to 1/10 of a mg, then reinstatement may not be for you.

 

I am so glad you tried a tiny amount instead of what doctors would recommend (they would start you at 10 mg, can you see how disastrous that would have been?).

 

If you persist in trying a reinstatement, try the smallest amount possible.

 

How many drops are in 1/10 mg?

 

Based on that, how much lexapro would be in a drop?

 

Keep in mind that the only way to take less than a drop is to dilute your solution.  This may affect the stability of the solution, so you should only do this a small amount at a time.

 

But overall, it looks like your best answer is to go the way of the cold turkey, and ride it out.  You will still heal - it does get better.  The only function of the reinstatement is to make the healing time more comfortable.  As Alto implied we don't have any statistics as to "how much better" a reinstatement can make, perhaps the member said that was how much it helped them.

I prefer to say it may take the edge off the symptoms.

 

At this point, it would probably be best to ride it out.  I've heard that described as a roller coaster.  You have been locked in for the ride, and you have to stay with it till the end.  You can scream, you can shake, you can cry - but you are on the ride for the duration, so you need to find a mindset which will enable you to endure.

 

Non Drug Techniques for Coping with Emotional Symptoms

 

Sometimes, knowing that the reinstatement did not work can be a relief, the removal of a decision that you no longer need to stress over.  No more "should I? could I? would I? how much?" agonizing.  Just let it go.  I hope that this can be freeing for you, and that you can find ways to distract and wait.  

The symptoms will change; you will have good times and bad - healing comes in Waves and Windows, and the symptoms will adjust as your different systems heal.  Work on self-soothing skills.  Remind yourself of my favourite affirmation: It does get better.  It can get better, it will get better.  

These are symptoms, they are not an indication of a serious problem or brain damage or anything like that - they will pass.  Be patient and kind to yourself, give yourself time.  It will get better.

[Godiswithme]

I have reduced to 1/4 of a drop over the past few days. It relieves tight chest and anxiety ridden stomach. But, still makes me feel foggy. If I find this not to be worth it, do I just stop? No matter how long I do it?

If it stops working, can I increase by tiny amounts?

May I ask, if I would have taken a 10 mg pill from a doctor, could there have been lasting effects?

[Godiswithme]

Can I just stop taking this 1/4 drop if I decide to. I have taken a bit for 4 days and reduced from 1/10th of a ml/mg (approx 3 drops) to 1/4 of one drop. It helps some symptoms, but makes me cry and feel very foggy. Can I just stop today if I want to on such a small amount?

[Godiswithme]

So sorry to bother anyone. Please may I just find out if I can stop the 1/4 drop of Escitalopram I have used in last 4 days? 1/10th of a mg had 3 drops so it is very very tiny.

[Shep]

Yes, after only four days, it's safe to simply stop a reinstatement. However, keep in mind it can take 4 days to a week for your CNS to register the drug. 

 

Please see this section of the thread on About reinstating and stabilizing to reduce withdrawal symptoms :

 

 

 

How long should you give reinstatement?

• It takes at least 4 days for your body to fully register the addition of a neuroactive drug. Unless you have an immediate bad reaction, observe your symptom pattern for about a week to see if the reinstatement is helping. If you have an immediate bad reaction, reduce or stop taking the drug.
• After reinstatement, the amount of time needed to alleviate withdrawal symptoms (stabilizing) varies according to the individual. Relief can be felt immediately, after some weeks, or after some months.
• Once you feel withdrawal symptoms are reduced after reinstatement, give your nervous system time to stabilize before attempting dosage reduction. Think in terms of months, not days.
• Be patient after you reinstate. Reinstatement may not immediately eliminate all withdrawal symptoms. You may still experience waves of symptoms, which usually lessen as time goes on. Do not attempt to taper again until you feel symptom-free, or at least until your withdrawal symptoms are mild and tolerable.
• The dose needed for effective reinstatement varies according to the individual.

When to discontinue reinstatement
If, upon reinstatement, you very soon feel worse, most likely you are sensitized to the drug and need to take a smaller dosage or, possibly, none at all.

• Sometimes reinstatement does not work. The nervous system has taken such a hard hit from withdrawal, it's destabilized beyond whatever effect the drug might have had.
• Sometimes reinstatement not only does not work, it causes an adverse reaction from a nervous system sensitized by withdrawal.
• If you have an immediate bad reaction, reduce or stop taking the drug.

 

 

 

 

[Godiswithme]

Shep, I am only taking 1/4 of a drop diluted. It does relieve a couple symptoms. Even if I continue and then decide to stop, how would I taper down? I feel the effects of drinking it within 2 hours. I am still trying to decide if it is worth it. It relieves 2 symptoms, but makes my head feel horrible.

[Godiswithme]

Alto, will you please answer only one question? I am using 1/4 of a drop diluted. It is relieving some symptoms but making my head feel horrible. If I stop after a month or whenever, could I just stop? With that small of an amount, do I need to worry about reducing by smaller or diluted amounts?

[Shep]

Shep, I am only taking 1/4 of a drop diluted. It does relieve a couple symptoms. Even if I continue and then decide to stop, how would I taper down? I feel the effects of drinking it within 2 hours. I am still trying to decide if it is worth it. It relieves 2 symptoms, but makes my head feel horrible.

 

 

Please give this at least a week to see if your headache gets better and makes it worth the reinstatement. Also, you may want to search for ways of handling headaches and other types of pain. Here is one link and I'm sure you can find others: 

 

Non-drug techniques for dealing with physical pain

 

After a week, you can simply stop. The longer you stay on it, of course, the more likely you will need to taper, but it would be best to give it at least a week and rate your symptom relief against any problems, such as headaches. 

 

If it does work, then you'll want to give yourself a number of weeks / months to stabilize. At that point, you'll taper the same as you would with any liquid taper. Please read over: 

• How to make a liquid from tablets or capsules
• Using an oral syringe and other tapering techniques
• Why taper by 10% of my dosage?

Given the severity of your previous cold turkey and the fact that you are also dealing with a benzo, you probably would want to stay on this dose for quite awhile if it's helpful. 

 

Which two symptoms is it helping? How much are you sleeping now? 

[Godiswithme]

Hello, it relieves tight chest and anxiety stomach. I dropped down to 1/8 of one drop today diluted. Head symptom lessened. I appreciate your advice. How would I ever taper down from this? I am asking because if I do this for more than a week, I need to decide? Not sleeping well. Thank you for your time.

[Godiswithme]

Taking 1/8 of a drop. Will I need to taper if on for more than a week? How to taper that small of an amount?

[Godiswithme]

GiWM - I hope you get a break for the holiday.

 

If you reacted to 1/10 of a mg, then reinstatement may not be for you.

 

I am so glad you tried a tiny amount instead of what doctors would recommend (they would start you at 10 mg, can you see how disastrous that would have been?).

 

If you persist in trying a reinstatement, try the smallest amount possible.

 

How many drops are in 1/10 mg?

 

Based on that, how much lexapro would be in a drop?

 

Keep in mind that the only way to take less than a drop is to dilute your solution. This may affect the stability of the solution, so you should only do this a small amount at a time.

 

But overall, it looks like your best answer is to go the way of the cold turkey, and ride it out. You will still heal - it does get better. The only function of the reinstatement is to make the healing time more comfortable. As Alto implied we don't have any statistics as to "how much better" a reinstatement can make, perhaps the member said that was how much it helped them.

 

I prefer to say it may take the edge off the symptoms.

 

At this point, it would probably be best to ride it out. I've heard that described as a roller coaster. You have been locked in for the ride, and you have to stay with it till the end. You can scream, you can shake, you can cry - but you are on the ride for the duration, so you need to find a mindset which will enable you to endure.

 

Non Drug Techniques for Coping with Emotional Symptoms

 

Sometimes, knowing that the reinstatement did not work can be a relief, the removal of a decision that you no longer need to stress over. No more "should I? could I? would I? how much?" agonizing. Just let it go. I hope that this can be freeing for you, and that you can find ways to distract and wait.

 

The symptoms will change; you will have good times and bad - healing comes in Waves and Windows, and the symptoms will adjust as your different systems heal. Work on self-soothing skills. Remind yourself of my favourite affirmation: It does get better. It can get better, it will get better.

 

These are symptoms, they are not an indication of a serious problem or brain damage or anything like that - they will pass. Be patient and kind to yourself, give yourself time. It will get better.

Hello, 3 drops were in .1 ml. I am currently taking 1/8 of one drop. So it is .00416667. Would that need to be tapered? Do people taper that small of an amount.

[nz11]

So GIWM what exactly are you saying

 

Are you saying i took 0.00416667 mg and i am having an adverse reaction so i want to stop taking it, or

are you saying i took 0.00416667mg and i am feeling better, i am feeling some therapeutic effects  so i want to stop taking it.

or are you saying i intend to take 0.00416667 for a month or two then stop taking it.

 

First could you just confirm if you are taking 0.00416667 or 0.0041666667 mg

just kidding.

 

I would have thought that dose to be so tiny you could stop it at any time .....Well i have to confess that you have taken me to a whole new galaxy a whole new realm of understanding on low dose ri. I have never heard of such a dose. Then again i'm only a newbee to this type of micro-chemistry.

 Although i have read of KB dealing in one thousands of a milligram.

 

What would you like to do  ?

Sorry im not much help good luck with your decisions.

 

nz11

What exactly are these chemicals people are swallowing?

[Shep]

Now that you and NZ are discussing this written out as .00416667 mg, it does show how incredibly sensitive our nervous system become during withdrawal. 

 

And that's key in answering your question. If you responded positively or negatively to this tiny amount, that means your nervous system is being affected by it. 

 

If you come off in a week or so, no taper would be required. But just like we recommend a quick taper for anyone who's on an AD for a month, if you decide at a month that the reinstatement is not working, you could do a quick 25% reduction taper like what is sometimes recommended for someone who's only taken an AD for a month.

 

If you're seeing an adverse reaction, though, it could be faster. But keep in mind, when your nervous system is registering even this tiny a dose, it's likely to miss it when it's gone. In other words, it could cause withdrawal symptoms. 

 

So the pace of a taper is in relation to the time back on the drug, making allowances for adverse reactions, as well as how you feel.  

 

Question - are you having any signs at all of the tongue symptoms that you had earlier, anything that could anyway resemble TD? 

 

 

[Godiswithme]

Now that you and NZ are discussing this written out as .00416667 mg, it does show how incredibly sensitive our nervous system become during withdrawal.

 

And that's key in answering your question. If you responded positively or negatively to this tiny amount, that means your nervous system is being affected by it.

 

If you come off in a week or so, no taper would be required. But just like we recommend a quick taper for anyone who's on an AD for a month, if you decide at a month that the reinstatement is not working, you could do a quick 25% reduction taper like what is sometimes recommended for someone who's only taken an AD for a month.

 

If you're seeing an adverse reaction, though, it could be faster. But keep in mind, when your nervous system is registering even this tiny a dose, it's likely to miss it when it's gone. In other words, it could cause withdrawal symptoms.

 

So the pace of a taper is in relation to the time back on the drug, making allowances for adverse reactions, as well as how you feel.

 

Question - are you having any signs at all of the tongue symptoms that you had earlier, anything that could anyway resemble TD?

No tongue symptoms at all. Will my nervous system ever get any better than it is right now? Could it possibly be permanent? I know no one knows for sure, but is it a possibility it could be permanently this sensitive? from what I did?

Thank you for your detailed response.

[Shep]

Permanent? That's doubtful. It may take a long time to resolve, though.

 

Here are some recovery stories off the Beyond Meds website. Lots of hope there.

 

Beyond Meds - Recovery Stories

 

I'm glad you're not having any tongue symptoms. That right there is a sign that this isn't permanent. 

 

 

[Godiswithme]

Permanent? That's doubtful. It may take a long time to resolve, though.

 

Here are some recovery stories off the Beyond Meds website. Lots of hope there.

 

Beyond Meds - Recovery Stories

 

I'm glad you're not having any tongue symptoms. That right there is a sign that this isn't permanent.

So recovery is synonymous with the desensitization of my nervous system?

[Godiswithme]

can I do anything about this? Anything? About my CNS? I am dying. Please, I mean maybe in a medical hospital, not drugs?

[Shep]

What does "I am dying" mean in terms of symptoms? If this is literal, then yes, you do need to seek medical treatment, as we cannot do anything more than provide information for you to read, as this is an an online forum.

 

But if "I am dying" means "I am suffering greatly", please read over your thread with all of the links that are provided to see if there are non-drug things that might help you. Distraction is one of the best techniques for many people to get through withdrawal, but it takes a lot of work before it becomes habit. 

 

If "I am dying" means you are having severe symptoms from your reinstatement, then please stop taking it.  

 

What are your symptoms after you take it? Are they getting progressively worse? 

 

 

[Godiswithme]

What does "I am dying" mean in terms of symptoms? If this is literal, then yes, you do need to seek medical treatment, as we cannot do anything more than provide information for you to read, as this is an an online forum.

 

But if "I am dying" means "I am suffering greatly", please read over your thread with all of the links that are provided to see if there are non-drug things that might help you. Distraction is one of the best techniques for many people to get through withdrawal, but it takes a lot of work before it becomes habit.

 

If "I am dying" means you are having severe symptoms from your reinstatement, then please stop taking it.

 

What are your symptoms after you take it? Are they getting progressively worse?

No, since I dropped to 1/8th of a drop, the tight chest, anxiety stomach are improved. I should not have written that line. You are right, that sentence is not clear. So is it just time and/or drugs that can help a sensitized nervous system?

[Godiswithme]

May I please get some help? I am 4 mos into WD. In the AM, my chest is so tight, it feels like it is in a vise. My throat feels very constricted also. my stomach is also full of anxiety.

On Dec 19th, I reinstated .1 ml of Lexapro. Gradually I have decreased to 1/8 drop over the last 5 days. It relieved those symptoms. I may need to increase to 1/4 drop because this AM the symptoms were back before it was time for the dosage.

Does anyone have these physical symptoms? They are severe. Do these type of symptoms ever go away and could they while I am continuing to take the small amounts of Lexapro?

Please someone tell me if reinstating a small amount of Abilify at 4 mos out could possibly help me with the panic and terror I am experiencing. I know I was afraid of TD. It could be a risk I am willing to take. I can't find anything about reinstating Abilify. I am begging for help.

[scallywag]

I've read posts in this thread from the last week or so.

• You reinstated 1 mg Lexapro on Dec. 19, 11 days ago.
• You experienced new and/or intensified symptoms within the first day of reinstating 1 mg Lexapro
• You have reported some decrease in symptom intensity of the new symptoms when you decreased the reinstated dose.

It seems to me that the chest tightness and increased anxiety is an adverse effect ("side" effect) of the reinstated Lexapro and that reinstatement hasn't provided any symptom relief for you -- in fact it seems to have made things worse.  What you decide to do about that is up to you.

 

Because you seem to be very sensitive to neuroactive medications, the prescription pad and the pharmacy are unlikely to provide solutions for you. In your situation, I wouldn't go near even the idea of reinstating Abilify. You may need to develop levels patience and fortitude you didn't know you had. I'm sorry you're in such a difficult spot.

[Godiswithme]

Thank you for responding Scallywag.

It's not exactly as you understood. But I see why.

I reinstated 1/10 th of a ml on Dec 19th. It was too strong.

Gradually reduced to 1/8 of a drop and have found relief of pre-EXISTING symptoms along the way.

That is why I am thinking about Abilify. Is there any history on a reinstatement of Abilify 4 mos out? May I please get a suggestion as to how much if I was on 2 mg for 8 months?

Thank you for your time.

I took 2 mg of Abilify for 8 mos and C/T'd on Dec 4th.

[Dez]

Godiswithme,

 

When I had my panic and anxiety attacks, along with first serious derealization, I swore up and down I was going to die. Sometimes I still feel like that. But I'm still here. You WILL get through this! Baby steps! We're here for you!

[RachelSusan]

Godiswithme,

I have been following your posts.  I have had the same experiences you are currently having.  It is horrible, nothing worse, however it will get better. I don't know how I made it through some of my tapers and my big withdrawal, but I did. Offering you my support, I know you are suffering.

Rachel

[Godiswithme]

May I please get some input on my question above? I will need to decide, but can I get some guidance from mods please?

[Chicago77]

I get the the constricted throat thing all the time. I have it right now in fact. It comes and goes and feels like there is a lump in my throat. I don't think mine has to do with anxiety bc my anxiety has subsided awhile ago. I definitely think it's a WD symptom though. 

[scallywag]

Thank you for the corrections to my summary of your recent dosage and changes. Those corrections don't change my suggestion:

• You are sensitive to medication -- adding a new or reinstating a previous medication is unlikely to be helpful.
• You would be wise to carefully discontinue the Lexapro.
• You will likely need to rely on non-drug techniques to cope with withdrawal symptoms.

[Godiswithme]

Thank you again for answering Scallywag. I am very confused as to why there isn't a chance a small amount of Abilify may help me if a tiny amount of Lexapro does.

[Godiswithme]

I am having a very hard time. Would it be that bad to try?

[Godiswithme]

Please tell me why you think I should carefully discontinue the Lexapro? It has relieved 2 symptoms?

[scallywag]

GIWM you've said that you are sensitive to medication. Your reports of symptoms support that assessment. You are currently experiencing symptoms of destabilization. Why would you want to risk further destabilization by adding back a medication?

[Godiswithme]

Well, I guess I am very confused. The tiny amount of Lexapro relieves the tight chest and horrible anxiety stomach for the day. I thought if A small amount of Abilify could relieve a panic or terror symptom, maybe it would be worth a try? I didn't realize it would be risking further destabilization. Since I C/T'd, I thought maybe it could help?