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Godiswithme

Godiswithme: I'm very scared

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jmncrr

 

but I have such a strong feeling I am going to die? Is this common, do you know?

You CT off 2 mg of Abilify also, so i dont know if anybody has addressed that. CT withdrawals from that can make you feel vulnerable and not secure.

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Godiswithme

 

but I have such a strong feeling I am going to die? Is this common, do you know?

You CT off 2 mg of Abilify also, so i dont know if anybody has addressed that. CT withdrawals from that can make you feel vulnerable and not secure.

 

Thank you so much for responding. I am so scared.

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PoetJester

Godiswithme,

 

 I am 2 1/2 years into a cold turkey wd from Zoloft and zyprexa. I feel better than I did on the meds, but am still not doing terribly well.  I still suffer from insomnia and fatigue, but it is possible to keep going.  I have even had to start drinking again after 15 years of sobriety as a way of getting to sleep at night.  A small reinstatement may be a decent plan, but I am not sure.  I didn't really know about reinstatement when I stopped so it was different for me, but there are plenty of people who as far as 2 years after quitting the drugs have gone back on them and have been able to gain their lives back.  The drugs are lousy, but sometimes are brains grow accustomed to them and pulling them away too quickly can be a shock.  I still think about trying something to help with my sleep, but haven't had much luck when I tried ambien, remeron, or trazadone.  Listen to your soul and figure out what is best for you.  God is proud of you for getting this far and is willing to understand whatever choice you choose to make regarding the drugs.

 

PoetJester

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nz11

I know how ridiculous this sounds and I'm embarrassed, but I have such a strong feeling I am going to die? Is this common, do you know?

Yes i was consumed with similar feelings in wdl  i believe this is a wdl symptom along with the desire to want to die and a fixation with death.

In wdl the brain becomes fixated on lies....dont believe any of it. i would speak back to it.

In time it slowly receded it took about 3  years for me once drug free.

You are going to have to dig deep when it comes to being patient.

 

sorry you are in this difficult place...if you are a person of faith and it appears you are, then this is the time to use it...however faith will not stop wdl trauma and a ri may be an option you could consider if its too much. This is not a failure just a small blip on the drug free trajectory.

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PoetJester

I forgot to add that there are also success stories out there of those who have completely quit the drugs, too.

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PatriciaVP

Feeling like you're going to die is extremely common. When I first started to taper, I went way too fast. It was awful. I was sure I was going into cardiac arrest on several occasions. The heart palpitations were so scary. As if I needed any more anxiety! At that point I reinstated a small amount. I think I went backup from 10 mgs to 11.25, and it really did relieve the worst of the symptoms. I stayed there for quite a while, and tapered off some other meds that were heightening the withdrawal symptoms. It wasn't until several months later (maybe 5?) that I restarted the Lexapro taper. Now I'm down to 8.1 mgs. Just starting to feel a little more like myself.

 

Earlier this year when I was in the worst of it I definitely felt like I was going to die. In fact I would go back and forth between wanting to die and panicking because I actually thought I was dying. What got me through it was reminding myself, often out loud, that it was just withdrawal. My perceptions were not reality, and this would all pass. "This too shall pass" became my mantra.

 

And eventually it did. Nothing is permanent in this life. Sometimes that's a painful reality, but in this case it's a reassuring one.

 

Don't be embarrassed about sharing any of these things here. We've all been there. We've all needed reassuring from time to time. That's what this site is all about. You're not being ridiculous. You're enduring one of the most difficult things any of us has ever gone through. You are incredibly strong for facing it with as much grace and determination as you have.

 

Peace, love and healing.

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Godiswithme

 

Godiswithme,

 

I am 2 1/2 years into a cold turkey wd from Zoloft and zyprexa. I feel better than I did on the meds, but am still not doing terribly well. I still suffer from insomnia and fatigue, but it is possible to keep going. I have even had to start drinking again after 15 years of sobriety as a way of getting to sleep at night. A small reinstatement may be a decent plan, but I am not sure. I didn't really know about reinstatement when I stopped so it was different for me, but there are plenty of people who as far as 2 years after quitting the drugs have gone back on them and have been able to gain their lives back. The drugs are lousy, but sometimes are brains grow accustomed to them and pulling them away too quickly can be a shock. I still think about trying something to help with my sleep, but haven't had much luck when I tried ambien, remeron, or trazadone. Listen to your soul and figure out what is best for you. God is proud of you for getting this far and is willing to understand whatever choice you choose to make regarding the drugs.

 

PoetJester

Thank you for the response. I don't know what to do. I am frozen in terror.

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Godiswithme

I know how ridiculous this sounds and I'm embarrassed, but I have such a strong feeling I am going to die? Is this common, do you know?

Yes i was consumed with similar feelings in wdl i believe this is a wdl symptom along with the desire to want to die and a fixation with death.

In wdl the brain becomes fixated on lies....dont believe any of it. i would speak back to it.

In time it slowly receded it took about 3 years for me once drug free.

You are going to have to dig deep when it comes to being patient.

 

sorry you are in this difficult place...if you are a person of faith and it appears you are, then this is the time to use it...however faith will not stop wdl trauma and a ri may be an option you could consider if its too much. This is not a failure just a small blip on the drug free trajectory.

Was it 3 years of pure hell like this is? Thank you for responding to me. Did it lessen during the 3 years?

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Godiswithme

Please someone answer. I quit 2 mg Abilfy and 30 mg Generic Lexapro Cold Turkey Sept 4th.

I have akathisia so bad, I can't describe it. Is the rule about reinstatement the same for Abilify as AD's?

I know I would be taking a bit of a risk going back on a small dose of generic Lexapro.

What about Abilify? Do I go back on 2mg of Abiligy or smaller and taper? Please help.

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Godiswithme

63 days ago

Edited by ChessieCat
corrected typo

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scallywag

You would reinstate a much, much smaller dose than your last one. Please read up on what's involved in reinstatement (RI) and its benefits+risks:
About reinstating and stabilizing to reduce withdrawal symptoms

The same guideline applies across psych medication categories: Reinstatement is more likely to be effective the sooner it is done after the last dose. As time passes, it becomes harder to gauge whether RI will be effective, and what the "Goldilocks" dose is -- not too much, not too little, but just right to ease withdrawal symptoms.

 

note added December 8, 2016:

after getting more information about this member's (Godiswithme) medications and symptoms, reinstatement seems to pose a higher risk for her. Posts about that start with this one -- link.

Edited by scallywag
note added

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ChessieCat

From Scallywag's post #50:

 

"The same guideline applies across psych medication categories: Reinstatement is more likely to be effective the sooner it is done after the last dose."

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Godiswithme

From Scallywag's post #50:

 

"The same guideline applies across psych medication categories: Reinstatement is more likely to be effective the sooner it is done after the last dose."

What kind of adverse reaction am I risking? Thank you for responding. I just took Benadryl. I am terrified. Do I reinstate both? At micro doses?

What is the worst case scenario? Could I have a stroke or die? Thank you.

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Godiswithme

 

From Scallywag's post #50:

 

"The same guideline applies across psych medication categories: Reinstatement is more likely to be effective the sooner it is done after the last dose."

What kind of adverse reaction am I risking? Thank you for responding. I just took Benadryl. I am terrified. Do I reinstate both? At micro doses?

What is the worst case scenario? Could I have a stroke or die? Thank you.

Hello ChessyCat? Do you know the answer? I know you can't tell me what to do.

But what kind of adverse reaction could I have? Do you know? Is it life threatening?

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Godiswithme

I can't take another day like today. Please someone help me?

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nz11

Sorry i missed your question to me.

It was very rough for two years then became manageable thereafter receding slowly.

Im doing better now.

 

What do you think about the idea of doing a drug signature?

 

Sorry you are in this bad place.

You ask what can happen in wdl well in wdl you can experience akathisia -an uncontrollable restlessness, uncontrollable psychological turmoil an overwhelming desire to commit suicide all iatrogenic in nature.

 

If you end up in hospital make no mistake about it they will drug you to multiples of previous levels.

 

What are your current symptoms?

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Godiswithme

 

Sorry i missed your question to me.

It was very rough for two years then became manageable thereafter receding slowly.

Im doing better now.

 

What do you think about the idea of doing a drug signature?

 

Sorry you are in this bad place.

You ask what can happen in wdl well in wdl you can experience akathisia -an uncontrollable restlessness, uncontrollable psychological turmoil an overwhelming desire to commit suicide all iatrogenic in nature.

 

If you end up in hospital make no mistake about it they will drug you to multiples of previous levels.

 

What are your current symptoms?

I have SEVERE akathisia. I am in withdrawal.

I cold turkeyed off of 30 mg generic Lexapro and 2mg Abilify on September 4th. I don't know what to do. Today was so horrible. I won't make it. I took Benadryl. I have some relief right now.

If I take a chance and reinstate both drugs at a very low dose, I could get a severe adverse reaction. I am trapped. It seems like I have no way out.

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nz11

What do you think about the idea of doing a drug sig?

 

Sorry you are going through this.

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ChessieCat

If you decide to reinstate, I suggest you reinstate only one drug at a time.  If you reinstate 2 drugs at once and you have an adverse reaction you will not know which one caused it.

 

My thought is that it would be best to reinstate Lexapro.  As AliG said previously you could try 1mg and see if that makes any improvement.  It takes about 4 days for the drug to get to full state in the blood and a bit longer for it to register in the brain.  You may feel some improvement within the first day.

 

Please take notes daily as per this example:  Keep Notes on Paper.  Keep note of what improves, what worsens and what stays the same.  This will help us to assess whether reinstatement is working.

 

As NZ has posted, please complete your drug signature as soon as you are able to.  It will make it easier to offer suggestions.

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Godiswithme

What do you think about the idea of doing a drug sig?

 

Sorry you are going through this.

I will do it tomorrow. Thank you.

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Godiswithme

If you decide to reinstate, I suggest you reinstate only one drug at a time. If you reinstate 2 drugs at once and you have an adverse reaction you will not know which one caused it.

 

My thought is that it would be best to reinstate Lexapro. As AliG said previously you could try 1mg and see if that makes any improvement. It takes about 4 days for the drug to get to full state in the blood and a bit longer for it to register in the brain. You may feel some improvement within the first day.

 

Please take notes daily as per this example: Keep Notes on Paper. Keep note of what improves, what worsens and what stays the same. This will help us to assess whether reinstatement is working.

 

As NZ has posted, please complete your drug signature as soon as you are able to. It will make it easier to offer suggestions.

Thank you for answering. I will do the signature.

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Shep

It has been 8.5 weeks since I ct'd off 30 mgs of generic lexapro and 2mg of Abilify.  I was depressed because my father who lived with us had died and marriage was getting rocky from the stress.  I had been taking  the generic lexapro for 2 years. This doctor added Abilify in Jan '16. I trusted her.  I was depressed over life issues.  I have no previous mental health diagnosis other than some anxiety which I had taken Xanax over the past 5 years.  Most .5 three times per day. varied in usage - often less.

I quickly became dysfunctional and family doctor prescribed .5 Ativan twice per day or I would have died.  I have only become a bit more functional. but barely. I don't know what to do.  I am very scared.

 

Hi, Godiswithme.

 

In reading over your thread, it looks like you may be having some rebound anxiety from Ativan. Ativan has an extremely short half-life with peak concentration hitting at about 2 hours.

 

Some people find that spreading their Ativan dose throughout the day to be helpful.

 

You may wish to start a thread for yourself in the members-only benzo forum. Benzo withdrawal can take a number of months to resolve, and many people report very intense anxiety and fear symptoms. 

 

 

Members only benzo forum

 

 

The Ashton Manual will give you more information on what to expect with benzo withdrawal:

 

The 2002 Ashton Manual is at http://www.benzo.org...anual/index.htm

 

The April, 7 2011 Ashton Manual Supplement is at http://www.benzo.org.uk/ashsupp11.htm

 

Ashton and Beyond in Benzo Tapering

 

 

The fear I felt during benzo withdrawal was beyond anything I can describe, but that level of fear is completely gone now. Even after 30 years of heavy benzo use, a lot of the symptoms are getting better now. 

 

Just thinking of the fear and anxiety as being "chemical" and a result of a drug was helpful to me. I would encourage you to find some healthy non-drug ways of self soothing such as mindfulness, yoga, Tai Chi, or calming music. This thread will get you started:

 

Non-drug techniques to cope with emotional symptoms

 

Please do go ahead and fill out your signature. 

 

Sending healing vibes your way. 

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doggiemama

GODiswithme my heart goes out to you because I know what you are going through. The anxiety is most terror any human can take I know it doesn't help right now but it does get better when I was very bad I thought this would never end and I was going to die.but it does get better . What helped me was getting into a warm bath with a cup of epsom salts and I smelt lavendrer oil and frankincese oil. I also learnt self acupuncher to release stress you will find pressure points on internet. I am not 100% yet but far better than was. GOD has also carried me

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Altostrata

Hello, GIWM.

 

Yes, you could try reinstating a small amount of Abilify rather than Lexapro. But first, we need to determine if possibly some of your symptoms are caused by the benzo. Sometimes people get anxiety rebound when the benzo wears off. This can be very severe and make withdrawal symptoms even worse.

 

Do you take any other drugs? What do you mean by akathisia? At what times of day do you take your benzo? Do your symptoms follow any daily pattern? Please keep daily notes on paper about your symptoms, your drugs, and their dosages.

 

Please try to stay calm and answer these questions.

 

Here's a link to that audio file catnapt posted, you'll have to copy and paste in your browser to hear it:

http://www.getselfhelp.co.uk/music/FirstAidPanicF.mp3

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Shep

GIWM, 

 

In addition to answering Altostrata's questions, it will be really helpful if you could list your drugs and symptoms in the way described by this post:

 

Keep notes on paper about your drug dosages and daily symptom pattern

 

 

I know you're scared and in the midst of a severe crisis state, but in order for us to help you, you need to give us this information. 

 

 

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nz11

Any update...?

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Godiswithme

Could someone please give me the link for completing my signature? I can't figure it out. Probably due to severe stress right now.

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Godiswithme

I stopped the Ativan after 2 weeks 2 days last week

took 20 mg escitalopram in august and Sept 2014

it was upped to 30 mg of escitalopram around Nov 2014

added 2mg Abilify Jan 2016  

was taking Xanax .5 Am .5 PM for a few years

currently down to .125 AM and .125 PM of Xanax - want to stop this

cold turkeyed off Escitalopram and Abilify on September 4th, 2016

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Godiswithme

I don't know how to do it

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Godiswithme

Will someone please copy and paste it for me?  I need help desperately 

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Godiswithme

 

Hello, GIWM.

 

Yes, you could try reinstating a small amount of Abilify rather than Lexapro. But first, we need to determine if possibly some of your symptoms are caused by the benzo. Sometimes people get anxiety rebound when the benzo wears off. This can be very severe and make withdrawal symptoms even worse.

 

Do you take any other drugs? What do you mean by akathisia? At what times of day do you take your benzo? Do your symptoms follow any daily pattern? Please keep daily notes on paper about your symptoms, your drugs, and their dosages.

 

Please try to stay calm and answer these questions.

 

Here's a link to that audio file catnapt posted, you'll have to copy and paste in your browser to hear it:

http://www.getselfhelp.co.uk/music/FirstAidPanicF.mp3

 

Please please help me  I was a little depressed  This psychiatrist has ruined my life.  I am not functional  please help me

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Godiswithme

 

 

Hello, GIWM.

 

Yes, you could try reinstating a small amount of Abilify rather than Lexapro. But first, we need to determine if possibly some of your symptoms are caused by the benzo. Sometimes people get anxiety rebound when the benzo wears off. This can be very severe and make withdrawal symptoms even worse.

 

Do you take any other drugs? What do you mean by akathisia? At what times of day do you take your benzo? Do your symptoms follow any daily pattern? Please keep daily notes on paper about your symptoms, your drugs, and their dosages.

 

Please try to stay calm and answer these questions.

 

Here's a link to that audio file catnapt posted, you'll have to copy and paste in your browser to hear it:

http://www.getselfhelp.co.uk/music/FirstAidPanicF.mp3

 

Please please help me  I was a little depressed  This psychiatrist has ruined my life.  I am not functional  please help me

 

Xanax 11 AM and 11PM  Its so small a dose iam just terrified to stop right now

I posted my signature but I didn't do it right

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Godiswithme

Is it possible for someone to cut and paste my post above into my signature?

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jmncrr

 

Could someone please give me the link for completing my signature? I can't figure it out. Probably due to severe stress right now.

 

Click on your name in upper right hand corner. You will see settings and click on that. Then click on signature. It will be on the left side of your settings page.

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